Mirta Narosky es.Profesora y licenciada en Artes Plรกsticas (orientaciรณn pintura), recibida en la Universidad Nacional de La Plata.Desde pequeรฑa, recibe premios en poesรญa y pintura nacionales e internacionales. En pintura se destacan: 1967- Manchas pavimentales (3ยบ premio, no alcanzando la edad mรญnima), 1968-1ยบ premio Pintura rupestre. Cรณrdoba, 1971-3ยบ premio internacional de pintura y grabado. Bruselas. Bรฉlgica. 1ยบ premio concurso nacional de manchas. Salta.
Mirta Narosky is a Professor and holds a Licentiate in Visual Arts (specializing in painting) from the National University of La Plata. Since childhood, she has received national and international awards in both poetry and painting. Her notable achievements in painting include: 1967โManchas pavimentales (3rd Prize; awarded despite not meeting the minimum age requirement); 1968โ1st Prize for Pintura rupestre (Rock Painting) in Cรณrdoba; and 1971โ3rd International Prize for Painting and Engraving in Brussels, Belgium, as well as 1st Prize in the National Manchas (Inkblot) Competition in Salta.
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Actividades seleccionadas de Mirta Norowsky/Selected Activities of Mirta Narosky
Exposiciones individuales/Individual Expositions
1987.- โAcuarelasโ, Direcciรณn de Cultura de Lomas de Zamora. 1988.– โAcuarelasโ, Escuela de Bellas Artes de Lanรบs. 1990.- โDe la tierra y otros planetasโ, Sheraton hotel, BsA. 1997.-โEspacios virtualesโ, Centro Cultural Gral. San Martรญn Bs. As. 1999.- โCajas virtuales โ contenidos realesโ, Galerรญa Espacio Buenos Aires.Museo de Bellas Artes de Chivilcoy, pcia. Buenos Aires. โ 2000.- โRetratos y rostrosโ Gal. Adriana Budich. Buenos Aires, Argentina. 2001.- โEntre materia y espรญritusโ en Gal. Alejo Carpentier, Camaguey (Cuba).โRaรญces y tangoโ (inaugura espacio de Arte y Tango), Hotel Continental. Bs.As. 2000.- Bs. As. 2004.-โInstantรกneas de vidaโ Galerรญa Braque. (Bs.As.) Realiza dos murales. 2006.- โEstados del almaโ Centro Cultural Borges. 2007.- โImรกgenes de la Riveraโ. Conventillo Verde de La Boca (pinta en la vรญa Pรบblica). 2008.- Mis mujeresโ (Inaugura Gal. La Imprenta con conferencia y pintura en vivo). 2009.- โVรณrticesโ Centro Cultural Borges. 2010.- โVรณrticesโ Museo Municipal. de Bellas Artes E. Pettoruti. La Plata. 2011.- โDesde el Vรณrticeโ Galerรญa Nes.Bs. As. Pintura de murales, (Coordinando a alumnado) Universidad Jaureche. 2014.- Pinta en vivo en Congreso de Medicina.โ Medicinaโฆ del Humanismo a la Ciencia y el Arteโ (Integra una mesa redonda: habla del Arte como sanador del individual Dos + Una (Invitada especial por Buenos Aires) Casa de Cรณrdoba en Bs. As. โConjugaciรณn: Formas y Lรญneasโen Distal Arte. Recoleta. 2015.-โPercepciones del Futuro 0.5โ, Abstracciones figurativas-figuraciones abstractas. Gal. Raรญces Americanas. 2016.- โVรณrtices y Percepciones del Futuro 0.5โ (dibujos y pinturas) INNOVA, Espacio de Arte. Punta del Este. Uruguay. 2018.- โFragmentacionesโ dibujos. Galerรญa Liliana Rodrรญguez. โMirta Narosky โMaestra-Artista Contemporรกnea invitada especial de Brea Studio. 2019.- โSACHโ Estudios abiertos de Chacarita.โInterpelando lo Ilusorioโ Invitada exposiciรณn individual Gal. PalermoH. 2020- Objetos y tramas tejidas en el espacio Performance, Bs. As. 2022- โConfluenciaโ. Serie Fragmentaciones. Museo del ojo. Cerro de las Rosas. Cรณrdoba. โMicro Vรณrticesโ pinturas e instalaciรณn Areatec. Edificio Cassarรก. Avellaneda. โFragmentaciones e improntas de la pandemiaโ Pcia de Bs A2023- Semana del Arte en CABA. โBarbaro bar. Mirta Narosky dibujos y pinturasโ 2024– โVรณrticesโ Pje de la Luna (inaugura Centro Cutural). โMis Mujeresโ Galerรญa Palermo H. Dibujos en el Bรกrbaro. 2024/25- โEspacios virtualesโ (serie de los 90s) en Galerรญa Roseum Contemporรกnea. 2025-โFragmentaciones y Microvรณrticesโ Museo Provincial Emilio Caraffa. Cรณrdoba.
Inherente a su hacer artรญstico/Related to her artistic work:
1983/2000 Es profesora de tesis en la Escuela de Bellas Artes de Lanรบs. Diseรฑa y realiza numerosas escenografรญas para teatro y tv. 1986/1987.- Viaja un aรฑo por Europa donde dicta cursos (Inglaterra e Italia) y a Marruecos, Egipto, Israel, India y Nepal, oportunidad en que se nutre del Arte Oriental. 1986/A la fecha. –Participa como jurado, dicta conferencias y forma parte de mesas redondas. Le realizan numerosas notas en diarios, revistas, radio y tv de todo el paรญs en el exterior. IIlustra libros y sus obras se encuentran en numerosos libros de Arte.Colabora con artรญculos de Arte. Escribe โDuendes por la dignidadโ libro para niรฑos sobre la Historia del Bauen como Fรกbrica recuperada1996/1997.- Es invitada especial a los encuentros nacionales de artistas plรกsticos (Catamarca, Sgo. del Estero y Cรณrdoba). 1999.- Dos documentales de su obra realizados por el cineasta Jorge Coscia. 2005.- Invitada como jurado Acadรฉmico para concurso de puesto docente de Dibujo en la Universidad de la Plata. 2012.- Es convocada por la Secretarรญa de la Industria para asesorar de Arte Plรกstica de Negocios. 2013.- Jurado en el 1ยบ Salรณn Nacional de pintura, Municipalidad de Florencio Varela. Entrega de un gruya intervenida por Mirta Narosky al Embajador de Japรณn. 2016.- Recibe la distinciรณn โLa Orden del Buzรณnโ, como personalidad de La Cultura. 2018.-Artista invitada como artista referente en el Encuentro de Pintores y Escultores por Direcciรณn de Juventud de Dolores. Chivilcoy. 2021- Diรกlogo entre artistas (zoom en vivo con Mรณnica Goldstein.Proyecto de AAVRA). 2023.- Exposiciรณn de sus alumnos de taller y clรญnica en Facultad de Derecho. UBA. 2024- Clรญnicas grupales para artistas. 2025- Pinta en vivo sobre el escenario en recital de Rock de grupo Fierr
Como solo la muerte es pasajera titulรณ su libro Alberto Szpunberg en 2013 y ante su desapariciรณn fรญsica, ocurrida hoy en Barcelona, se torna verdadero el aserto de la supervivencia en la obra, en la palabra, la materia candente que Alberto Szpunberg templara con sutil delicadeza. Periodista, militante combativo, docente, pero siempre poeta, deja sus palabras inscriptas en el fragor de los tiempos. Desde Poemas de la mano mayor de 1962 y Juego limpio de 1963, Szpunberg fue desgranando esa estรฉtica suya, tan reconocible, al acecho del exilio, del regreso y del olvido. Recibiรณ, entre otros, el premio Alcalรก de Henares de poesรญa 1983 por Su fuego en la tibieza y en 1993 el Premio Internacional de Poesรญa Antonio Machado por Luces que a lo lejos. Dirigiรณ la carrera de Lengua y Literaturas Clรกsicas en la Universidad de Buenos Aires, donde fue profesor de Literatura Argentina. Y fue director entre 1975 y 1976 del mรญtico suplemento cultural del diario La Opiniรณn. — Biblioteca Nacional Mariano Moreno
Only Death Is Fleetingโsuch was the title Alberto Szpunberg chose for his book in 2013; and now, following his physical passing today in Barcelona, โโthe assertion of survivalโwithin one’s work, within the word, that incandescent matter which Alberto Szpunberg tempered with subtle delicacyโproves profoundly true. Journalist, militant activist, educator, yet always a poet, he leaves his words inscribed amidst the tumult of the times. From Poemas de la mano mayor (1962) to Juego limpio (1963), Szpunberg steadily unfolded that aesthetic of hisโso instantly recognizableโever poised in the shadow of exile, of return, and of oblivion. Among other honors, he received the 1983 Alcalรก de Henares Poetry Prize for Su fuego en la tibieza and, in 1993, the Antonio Machado International Poetry Prize for Luces que a lo lejos. He directed the program in Classical Languages โโand Literatures at the University of Buenos Aires, where he also served as a professor of Argentine Literature. Furthermore, between 1975 and 1976, he served as the director of the legendary cultural supplement of the newspaper La Opiniรณn. โ Mariano Moreno National Library
Noรฉ Jitrik naciรณ en Rivera, provincia de Buenos Aires, en 1928. Fue profesor en diversas universidades y, desde 1997, director del Instituto de Literatura Hispanoamericana de la Universidad de Buenos Aires. Dirigiรณ la obra Historia Crรญtica de la Literatura Argentina, que se publicรณ en doce tomos. Es autor de mรกs de 50 libros (ensayos, novelas, poemarios y relatos). Colaborรณ en diversos medios, entre otros en LA GACETA Literaria. Ganรณ tres premios Konex y recibiรณ doctorados honoris causa de varias universidades. Falleciรณ en 2022.
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Para muchos, es el crรญtico literario mรกs importante de Argentina. En este texto, analiza el proceso de convertirse en lector y las consecuencias de una concepciรณn errรณnea de su naturaleza. Tambiรฉn aborda las ideas equivocadas sobre el descubrimiento de Amรฉrica y su propia concepciรณn del cristianismo como resultado de un acontecimiento poรฉtico. Alejandra Crespรญn Argaรฑaraz – LA GACETA
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Noรฉ Jitrik was born in Rivera, Buenos Aires Province, in 1928. He was a professor at various universities and, since 1997, director of the Institute of Hispanic American Literature at the University of Buenos Aires. He edited the twelve-volume work Critical History of Argentine Literature. He is the author of more than 50 books (essays, novels, poetry collections, and short stories). He contributed to various publications, including LA GACETA Literaria. He won three Konex Awards and received honorary doctorates from several universities. He passed away in 2022.
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He is, for many, Argentina’s greatest literary critic. Here he analyzes the process of becoming a reader and the consequences of a mistaken conception of its nature. He also discusses the misconceptions related to the discovery of America and his conception of Christianity as the result of a poetic event. Alejandra Crespรญn Argaรฑaraz – LA GACETA.
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Entrevista, 31 Enero 2016
-ยฟPor quรฉ afirma que โel lector no existeโ?
-Sรญ, es una expresiรณn un poco escandalosa, pero creo que tiene sustento. La crรญtica mรกs habitual hace una pequeรฑa operaciรณn mencionando la palabra โlectorโ, entonces el crรญtico cuando algo no le gusta o no entiende dice โel lector no entiende…โ Como si el lector fuera una categorรญa objetiva, mensurable, que se sabe quiรฉn es. Y eso influye sobre las editoriales que empiezan a caracterizar a los lectores en un momento determinado y publican libros para los que ellos creen que son esos lectores. Pero resulta que el lector estรก cuando lee, no es algo de existencia previa a la lectura. ยฟPor quรฉ suponer que la gente que pasa por la calle son lectores? Probablemente sepan leer, pero no necesariamente son lectores en el sentido literario de la palabra. Entonces, se convierten en lectores cuando empiezan a leer y cuando empiezan a leer literatura, por lo tanto, no existen previamente. Es el libro el que los crea, empieza uno a ser lector cuando se conecta con un texto. Entonces el texto es el que hace la operaciรณn natalicia, se nace a cada momento como lector si en cada uno de esos momentos hay un nuevo texto que se pone ante sus ojos. Es una manera de dar una existencia que tiene luego una ubicaciรณn perversa, porque supone toda una red tรญpicamente comercial en relaciรณn con el libro, de una crรญtica fรกcil, de la arrogancia de pretender saber quiรฉnes son los lectores y quรฉ quieren leer. La lectura es una operaciรณn compleja y lo interesante de esa operaciรณn es que no puede renunciar a esa complejidad y, por el contrario, hay que provocarla. Porque mediante el acercamiento a esa complejidad y el intento de desentraรฑar la red que implica esa complejidad el que lee, ya convertido en lector, empieza a ser una persona de otra naturaleza.
-Y ahรญ nos adentramos en la filosofรญa…
-Sรญ, la literatura nos cambia. En realidad, el lector no existe, es el texto el que genera al lector. Esa es la provisoria explicaciรณn de un concepto que suele chocar a mucha gente porque estรกn mรกs acostumbrados a lugares comunes. Yo escribรญ un libro en Mรฉxico sobre el diario de Colรณn cuyo tรญtulo era Los dos ejes de la cruz. Una vez que apareciรณ fui a buscarlo a una librerรญa muy buena, Gandhi, que en Mรฉxico tiene miles de consumidores, y lo habรญan puesto en religiรณn porque se suponรญa que si dice โcruzโ es para lectores de religiรณn. Es decir, presuponรญan el universo de lectores. El libro no merecรญa esa suerte porque no tenรญa nada que ver con religiรณn salvo develar la relaciรณn que hubo en el momento llamado โdescubrimientoโ entre la fe, la empresa, la mirada, el mundo que se abrรญa y todo eso.
-ยฟFue realmente un descubrimiento el descubrimiento de Amรฉrica?
-Es una palabra que trata de sintetizar lo que implicรณ la llegada de los europeos a este continente cuya existencia ignoraban. Hay algunas teorรญas segรบn las cuales la parte norte ya habรญa sido conocida por viajeros nรณrdicos, pero eso no tuvo trascendencia. Lo que tuvo transcendencia fue la llegada de Colรณn y como esa tierra no era conocida -porque Colรณn suponรญa que por ese trayecto llegaba al Oriente-, entonces se hablรณ de descubrimiento. Es una palabra tรญpica no del que es descubierto sino del descubridor; es la palabra que el que llega a un lugar puede emplear para explicar lo que se le estรก presentando, pero el que estรก en ese lugar no siente necesariamente que le corresponda, no se siente descubierto necesariamente. Lo que pasa es que tampoco hay testimonios de cรณmo se sintieron los naturales de estas islas cuando vieron a los espaรฑoles, lo รบnico que se sabe es lo que los espaรฑoles dijeron. Hubo tentativas de recuperar palabras de los pueblos originarios, en Mรฉxico sobre todo, en la poesรญa, en mitos, en las inscripciones, en los templos. Hay fuertes tradiciones que existรญan antes de que los espaรฑoles llegaran, pero fueron ocultadas o borradas o tardaron en conocerse, y se necesitaron investigaciones muy profundas mucho tiempo despuรฉs. Pero lo que sabemos de todo eso es lo que dijeron los llamados descubridores.
-ยฟCuรกl es tรบ opiniรณn respecto a los pueblos originarios?
-Si los espaรฑoles hubieran llegado a las costas de Cuba, a las islas, al continente, cien aรฑos despuรฉs, hubiera sido otra cosa. Habrรญan tenido que reconocer la existencia de mundos organizados como era el de los Mayas, de los Aztecas o de los Incas que eran imperios con estructura, organizaciรณn, lenguaje y hasta incluso en momentos con comienzo de escritura. Cien aรฑos despuรฉs la historia hubiera sido completamente diferente, que es lo que les ocurriรณ cuando llegaron a Oriente, donde habรญa culturas ya consolidadas. Ellos llegaron en un momento en el que arrasaron con todo y lo preexistente fue liquidado o reducido, convertido hasta cierto punto, pero no pudieron terminar con todo. Introdujeron enfermedades, esclavitud, servidumbre, cosas que pueden ser entendidas como el primitivismo, el salvajismo de sociedades para las que la apropiaciรณn es como la razรณn de ser. Al mismo tiempo, esa operaciรณn es como una de las penรบltimas de los comportamientos que vienen de la antigรผedad mรกs remota, porque siempre hubo pueblos que se apropiaron de otros, que esclavizaron y crearon imperios sobre la base de la ocupaciรณn de territorios. Eso fue como un penรบltimo coletazo de esa inveterada costumbre de la historia europea de ocupar tierras, apropiarse de ellas y de la gente.
-Hablamos de la โcruzโ ยฟquรฉ concepto tiene de Dios?
-Hace un tiempo saquรฉ un artรญculo en Pรกgina 12, que se llama โPasionesโ, donde comento la pasiรณn segรบn San Mateo de Juan Sebastiรกn Bach en particular, de ahรญ voy y me meto mรกs en la redacciรณn de los evangelios y la creaciรณn del cristianismo. La hipรณtesis que marco ahรญ es que la creaciรณn probablemente mรกs importante de la civilizaciรณn humana, la Iglesia Catรณlica, surge de un hecho poรฉtico. El hecho poรฉtico es la versiรณn que dan los evangelios de un episodio ocurrido, que habรญan recogido por tradiciones orales y que correspondรญa a un pequeรฑo lugar de un inmenso planeta, el universo judรญo, en el cual un sujeto hablรณ de la paternidad de Dios Padre, que era el de objeto de culto de ese lugar tan pequeรฑo y que se distinguรญa de todo lo que lo rodeaba. En ese universo surgieron muchรญsimos tipos, algunos probablemente esquizofrรฉnicos, otros iluminados, profetas. Uno de ellos pudo despuรฉs ser conocido como Cristo. Esos actos que habrรญan ocurrido en ese momento fueron recogidos por poetas y escritores que les dieron una estructura y eso dio lugar a la creaciรณn mรกs poderosa de la civilizaciรณn humana. El fundamento de eso es una creencia previa, la existencia de Dios, que recorre toda la genรฉtica humana desde tiempos remotos y que surge como una necesidad primaria de una explicaciรณn que se va concretando en mitos y leyendas, que poco a poco comienzan a ordenar la vida de la gente y a tener cabida en el orden de la escritura que la recoge. Entonces la palabra โDiosโ, en realidad, es una explicaciรณn de un conjunto de causas que no solo son inexplicables sino que generan angustia. Esa explicaciรณn calma la angustia, sobre todo si se ordena en forma de un rito especรญfico que es el que establece una conexiรณn con uno mismo y que sofoca la angustia del tiempo, de la muerte, de la existencia, del otro. Eso pone las cosas en un terreno y deja de lado el otro aspecto de la cuestiรณn que es la natural tendencia que tenemos todos a tratar de sofocar esa angustia que nos hace pensar que hay enigmas, pero que no son de carรกcter necesariamente mรญstico. Esos enigmas generan una actitud que podemos llamar de religiosidad, la voluntad, la conexiรณn con esos enigmas y la voluntad de entregarse a ellos aceptรกndolos, considerando que existen y que son inabordables y que eso determina una cierta actitud de respeto frente a lo desconocido.
ยฉ LA GACETA
-Why do you claim that โthe reader doesn’t existโ?
-Yes, it’s a somewhat provocative statement, but I think it’s well-founded. The most common form of criticism performs a subtle manipulation by using the word โreader.โ When a critic dislikes or doesn’t understand something, they say, โthe reader won’t understandโฆโ As if the reader were an objective, measurable category, whose identity is known. And this influences publishers, who begin to characterize readers at a given moment and publish books for those they believe these readers to be. But the truth is, the reader exists only when they are reading; their existence isn’t prior to the act of reading. Why assume that the people walking down the street are readers? They probably know how to read, but they aren’t necessarily readers in the literary sense of the word. They become readers when they start reading, and when they start reading literature; therefore, they don’t exist beforehand. It is the book that creates them; one becomes a reader when one connects with a text. So the text is what performs this act of creation; one is born as a reader at every moment if, in each of those moments, there is a new text placed before one’s eyes. It’s a way of granting an existence that then takes on a perverse dimension, because it implies an entire network, typically commercial, in relation to the book, of facile criticism, of the arrogance of pretending to know who readers are and what they want to read. Reading is a complex operation, and the interesting thing about this operation is that it cannot relinquish that complexity; on the contrary, it must be embraced. Because through approaching that complexity and attempting to unravel the network that this complexity entails, the person who reads, now transformed into a reader, begins to be a person of a different nature.
-And that’s where we delve into philosophyโฆ
-Yes, literature changes us. In reality, the reader doesn’t exist; it’s the text that creates the reader. That’s the provisional explanation of a concept that often surprises many people because they’re more accustomed to clichรฉs. I wrote a book in Mexico about Columbus’s diary, titled The Two Axes of the Cross. Once it was published, I went to look for it at a very good bookstore, Gandhi, which has thousands of customers in Mexico, and they had placed it in the religion section because they assumed that if it said “cross,” it was for readers interested in religion. In other words, they presupposed the universe of readers. The book didn’t deserve that fate because it had nothing to do with religion except for revealing the relationship that existed at the time of the so-called “discovery” between faith, enterprise, perspective, the world that was opening up, and all of that.
-Was the discovery of America truly a discovery?
-It’s a word that tries to summarize what the arrival of the Europeans on this continent, whose existence they were unaware of, entailed. There are some theories according to which the northern part had already been known by Nordic travelers, but that didn’t have any lasting impact. What did have an impact was the arrival of Columbus, and since this land was unknownโbecause Columbus thought that this route would take him to the Eastโthe term “discovery” was used. It’s a word typical not of the discovered but of the discoverer; it’s the word that the one who arrives at a place can use to explain what is being presented to him, but the one who is already in that place doesn’t necessarily feel that it applies to them, doesn’t necessarily feel discovered. The thing is, there are no accounts of how the natives of these islands felt when they saw the Spaniards; all we know is what the Spaniards said. There have been attempts to recover words from the indigenous peoples, especially in Mexico, in poetry, in myths, in inscriptions, in temples. There are strong traditions that existed before the Spaniards arrived, but they were hidden or erased or took a long time to become known, and very in-depth research was needed much later. But what we know about all of this is what the so-called discoverers said.
-What is your opinion regarding the indigenous peoples?
-If the Spanish had arrived on the coasts of Cuba, the islands, the continent, a hundred years later, it would have been a different story. They would have had to recognize the existence of organized worlds such as those of the Mayans, the Aztecs, or the Incas, which were empires with structure, organization, language, and even, at times, the beginnings of writing. A hundred years later, history would have been completely different, which is what happened when they arrived in the East, where there were already established cultures. They arrived at a time when they swept everything away, and what pre-existed was liquidated or reduced, transformed to a certain extent, but they couldn’t completely eradicate everything. They introduced diseases, slavery, servitude, things that can be understood as the primitivism, the savagery of societies for which appropriation is like their reason for being. At the same time, that operation is like one of the penultimate manifestations of behaviors that come from the most remote antiquity, because there have always been peoples who appropriated others, who enslaved and created empires based on the occupation of territories. That was like a penultimate gasp of that inveterate custom of European history of occupying lands, appropriating them and the people.
-We talked about the “cross,” what is your concept of God?
-Some time ago I published an article in Pรกgina 12, called “Passions,” where I discuss the Passion according to Saint Matthew by Johann Sebastian Bach in particular, and from there I delve further into the writing of the Gospels and the creation of Christianity. The hypothesis I put forward there is that the probably most important creation of human civilization, the Catholic Church, arises from a poetic event. The poetic event is the version given by the Gospels of an episode that occurred, which they had gathered through oral traditions and which corresponded to a small place on an immense planet, the Jewish world, in which a man spoke of the fatherhood of God the Father, who was the object of worship in that very small place and who was distinguished from everything that surrounded it. In that universe, many different types of people emerged, some probably schizophrenic, others enlightened, prophets. One of them would later become known as Christ. The events that supposedly occurred at that time were recorded by poets and writers who gave them structure, and this led to the most powerful creation of human civilization. The foundation of this is a prior belief, the existence of God, which runs through all of human genetics from ancient times and arises as a primary need for an explanation that gradually takes shape in myths and legends, which little by little begin to order people’s lives and find their place in the written tradition that records them. So the word “God,” in reality, is an explanation for a set of causes that are not only inexplicable but also generate anxiety. This explanation calms the anxiety, especially if it is structured in the form of a specific ritual that establishes a connection with oneself and suppresses the anxiety of time, of death, of existence, of the other. This places things on a certain footing and sets aside the other aspect of the matter, which is the natural tendency we all have to try to suppress this anxiety that makes us think there are enigmas, but which are not necessarily mystical in nature. These enigmas generate an attitude that we can call religiosity, the will, the connection with these enigmas, and the willingness to surrender to them, accepting them, considering that they exist and are unfathomable, and that this determines a certain attitude of respect towards the unknown.
Marina Mariasch Nace en Buenos Aires en una familia judรญa. Licenciada en Letras y docente en la carrera de Artes de la Escritura (UNA). En los aรฑos 90 fundรณ el sello editorial Siesta. Publicรณ poesรญa (El zig zag de las instituciones, Paz o amor, Mutual sentimiento, entre otros), novela (El Matrimonio, Estamos unidas, Efectos personales), cuentos y ensayos que fueron traducidos al alemรกn, inglรฉs, finlandรฉs. Escribe e interviene en diversos medios culturales.
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Marina Mariasch was born in Buenos Aires to a Jewish family, She holds a degree in Literature and teaches in the Creative Writing program at the National University of the Arts (UNA). In the 1990s, she founded the publishing house Siesta. She has published poetry (El zig zag de las instituciones, Paz o amor, Mutual sentimiento, among others), novels (El Matrimonio, Estamos unidas, Efectos personales), short stories, and essays that have been translated into German, English, and Finnish. She writes for and contributes to various cultural media outlets.
sparks, locks of hair. Anguished, she came and went
carrying and bringing boxes and orders
and my mother already a ghost but still
alive shook her head
looked at my friends, shook her head
that that was something to do to
a friend the day that you enter
a new house. Trouble
recently sown. In the hall
there was a a virgin from some religion or other
a fertility goddess and a cross
on a bright-colored rosary
I decided to keep them, to throw them away
I thought of what survives
and has a name before you do.
I wanted only that the days
Psss, go around in baggy pants,
tee shirt and a mug of coffee with milk,
what is called around the house, although
that sounds silly, the words are
useless devises for the
morning peace. Itโs not that
I venerate them. I had bought
ghosts, long before
itโs necessary to hate a bit
what you love. They continue here
among us, seeing how
they love us and leave,
they bring flowers of those
that rot and others that
stay alive every season.
The variable becomes
static never permanent
durable, things arrived
from other homes. The
epoch changed. It ceased being the
same, there are no hammocks
or games that arenโt
mental, table.
The house of honey
is this one, not the one to the side
it isnโt the one in front.
That closed, the other navigates
a drunken ship. Here the honey
is never lacking, it is ours
crossed three houses
three avenues toward poverty
it is our amalgam
our amalga, the word that never
appears when I want to
name it. It remains.
IO the chain of trembling
that we walk in pajamas
with cups of cover in hand
some things continue here
we continue here, we not
the same, but not so much
either, going to sleep
getting up, without knowing
very well when it ends
but knowing well
when we move together
near the oven to get
warm, when we share
drying washed hair
by hands, that ends
in a different path.
________________________________________________
No le tengas miedo a las tormentas. Los truenos son espectaculares tienen que ver con el cine. Si tenรฉs miedo, venรญ a mi cama nos tapamos con dos frazadas. Los relรกmpagos. El flash de una cรกmara que le saca una foto a la ciudad. Los balcones se iluminan por un segundo y se apagan como cuando es navidad. Las tormentas son buenas. un preรกmbulo o conclusiรณn que tranquiliza porque llegรณ.
___________________________
Donโt be afraid of the storms.
The thunder
Is spectacular
They are like the movies.
If you are afraid, come to my bed
Weโll cover ourselves with two blankets.
The lightening bolts. The flash of a camera
that takes a photo of the entire city.
The balconies are illuminated for a second
and go dark
as when it is Christmas.
The storms are good.
A preamble or a conclusion
that quiets because it arrived.
___________________________________
Hace calor a esta hora. En el patio de abajo corre viento como en los lugares de playa. La perra lame sus cachorros para refrescarlos. despuรฉs de comer nos tiramos en la cama hacemos la siesta, la cama es un barco la alfombra es el mar. Las sierras de la obra hacen de chicharras los obreros tocan el toc-toc.
Itโs hot at this hour.
In the patio below
wind runs
as in those places on the beach.
The bitch licks its pups
to cool them off.
after eating
we throw ourselves on the bed
we take a siesta
the bed is a ship
the rug is the sea
The mountains of the work
act like cicadas
the workers play knock-knock.
Estรกs sentado, estรกs leyendo En la mesa del comedor hay una canasta con pan y manteca Y vos-naranja Sos suavecito en los dedos cuando hablรกs por telรฉfono Si estamos resfriados nos damos besos aรฉreos Si estamos mojados nos damos besos mojados. Clic-clic es el ruido de la puerta cuando me late mรกs fuerte y cruzo las piernas. De los gajos de una naranja saliรณ el ombligo.
Los dรญas nublados tenรฉs los ojos como pasto mojado. Tu piel es suave como la parte de adentro de los brazos y tenรฉs pecas en la boca, ยฟte comiste una torta de pecas? Ahora te mirรกs en un espejo chiquito te saca la lengua, te devuelve una risa. Cerca de casa hay un รกrbol de moras. Un dรญa voy a ir a la maรฑana Y te voy a juntar muchas moras para el desayuno. Cuando llegue el invierno cada uno tendrรก sus pantuflas tendrรก los pies tibios.
You are seated, you are reading
On the dining room table
there is a basket
with bread and butter
and you-orange
You are very soft with your fingers
When you speak
on the telephone
If we have a cold
We give each other air kisses
If we are damp
We give each other damp kisses.
Click-click is the sound of the door
when it throbs in me stronger
and I cross my legs.
Some of the orange peel
came out of my belly button.
On cloudy days you have
Eyes like damp grass.
Your skin is soft like the part
Inside your arms and you have
freckles on your tongue. Did you eat a
freckles cake?
Now you look at yourself
In a small mirror
It takes out your tongue
It gives back to your smile.
Near the house there is a blackberry
Bush. One day
Iโm going to go in the morning
and Iโll gather for you many blackberries
for breakfast.
When the winter comes
each one of us will have slippers
will have warm feet.
____________________________________________
Libros de Marina Mariasch/Books by Marina Mariasch
Mario Diament es escritor, periodista y profesor universitario,. Naciรณ en Buenos Aires, ha vivido en Israel y en varias partes de Estados Unidos. Trabajรณ como corresponsal en Europa, Medio Oriente y EEUU. Fue director del diario La Opiniรณn y de la revista Expreso. Es miembro correspondiente de la Academia Nacional de Periodismo de Argentina. En 2014 recibiรณ el Premio Konex, que lo ubicรณ entre los 10 dramaturgos mรกs relevantes de la dรฉcada. Ha recibido numerosos reconocimientos por sus obras de teatro, que se han representado en Europa, Australia, Estados Unidos y Amรฉrica Latina. Algunas de sus piezas son: Esquirlas, Crรณnica de un secuestro, El libro de Ruth, Cita a ciegas, Un informe sobre la banalidad del amor y Tierra del fuego. Su pieza Cita a ciegas llegรณ a la pantalla grande en dos oportunidades: Puzzle (, e Inevitable. Entre sus obras narrativas se encuentran el libro de cuentos El Exilio, la novela Martรญn Eidรกn y los ensayos Conversaciones con un judรญo y El Hermano Mayor โ Crรณnicas norteamericanas.
_________________________________________
Mario Diament is a writer, journalist and university professor. Born in Buenos Aires, he has lived in Israel and various parts of the United States. He worked as a correspondent in Europe, the Middle East, and the United States. He was the director of the newspaper La Opiniรณn and the magazine Expreso. He is a corresponding member of the National Academy of Journalism of Argentina. In 2014, he received the Konex Award, which placed him among the 10 most important playwrights of the decade. He has received numerous awards for his plays, which have been performed in Europe, Australia, the United States, and Latin America. Some of his plays include: Esquirlas (Splinters), Crรณnica de un secuestro (Chronicle of a Kidnapping), El libro de Ruth (The Book of Ruth), Cita a ciegas (Blind Date), Un informe sobre la banalidad del amor (A Report on the Banality of Love) and Tierra del Fuego (Land of Fire). Cita a ciegas was adapted into two films: Puzzle and Inevitable. His narrative works include the short story collection Exilio (Exile), the novel Martรญn Eidรกn, and the essay collections Conversaciones con un judรญo (Conversations with a Jew) and El Hermano Mayor โ Crรณnicas norteamericanas (The Older Brother โ North American Chronicles.)
Esta obra es esencialmente una pieza de ficciรณn. Muchos de los episodios yreferencias estรกn basados en hechos reales en la vida de Yulie Cohen, perootros son inventados o imaginados.Todas la escenas tienen lugar en el aรฑo 2000, excepto la รบltima, que sucedeen 2005.
_______________________________________
Oscuridad. Se escuchan disparos de ametralladora y unos rayos de luz, similares a los de balas trazadoras, cruzan la escena. Mรกs disparos. Se escucha la sirena de autos policiales y de ambulancias. Murmullos de horror. Gritos.
LOCUTOR DE TV
โLos atacantes abrieron fuego con ametralladoras y arrojaron granadas en el momento en que los 21 miembros de la tripulaciรณn del vuelo de El Al 061, proveniente de Nueva York, se disponรญan a ingresar al Hotel Europa, en la capital britรกnica. Uno de los terroristas muriรณ al instante cuando una de las granadas que portaba explotรณ prematuramente. El otro terrorista, Hasรกn el- Fawzi, de 22 aรฑos, fue arrestado pocos momentos despuรฉs. En el ataque perdiรณ la vida una de las auxiliares de a bordo, Nirit Golรกn, de 25 aรฑos. Otra de las auxiliares, Yael Alรณn, de 22 aรฑos resultรณ herida.โ
Se encienden las luces.
YAEL estรก esperando en la pequeรฑa sala, sentada ante una mesa, en el nivel mรกs alto. Hay una silla vacรญa del lado opuesto. Una puerta invisible se abre y entra HASAN. La observa un instante y se sienta frente a ella, con las manos ocultas detrรกs de la mesa.
YAEL
Hola. Soy Yael.
HASAN
Yo soy Hasรกn.
YAEL
Lo sรฉ. Te reconozco. (Le tiende la mano) Mucho gusto.
HASAN
(Le da tรญmidamente la mano a su vez.) Mucho gusto, tambiรฉn.
Pausa.
YAEL
ยฟCรณmo estรกs?
HASAN
Ya lo ves. (Pausa.) ยฟY vos?
YAEL
Nerviosa. Es natural.
Pausa.
HASAN
ยฟTuviste un buen viaje?
YAEL
Sรญ, muy bueno.
Pausa.
YAEL
(Cont.) No debรฉs recibir muchas visitas.
HASAN
No.
YAEL
ยฟNo tenรฉs familia?
HASAN
No. No tengo a nadie.
Pausa.
YAEL
Te habrรก sorprendido mi pedido, me imagino.
HASAN
Mi abogado me dijo que tenรญas algo importante que preguntarme.
YAEL
Bueno, sรญ. Importante para mรญ, por lo menos.
HASAN
ยฟDe quรฉ se trata?
YAEL
(Toma coraje.) Hace veintitrรฉs aรฑos trataste de matarme, asรญ que decidรญ venir hasta aquรญ para que me expliques por quรฉ.
Silencio.
HASAN
Yo no tratรฉ de matarte.
YAEL
Todavรญa tengo una cicatriz bastante fea en el brazo. (Se la muestra). Y mataste a mi amiga Nirit.
HASAN
Yo no tratรฉ de matarte, ni tampoco a tu amiga. Tratรฉ de matar lo que representaban.
YAEL
ยฟLo que representรกbamos?
HASAN
El enemigo, la ocupaciรณn. (Se controla.) Pero eso fue hace mucho tiempo. Ya no soy la misma persona.
YAEL se queda silenciosa.
HASAN
(Cont.) Tuve mucho tiempo para pensar. Es lo que uno hace aquรญ. Pensar. A veces uno piensa tanto que siente que va a estallarle la cabeza.
YAEL
ยฟY quรฉ pensaste?
HASAN
Muchas cosas. Pensรฉ en lo que sucediรณ ese dรญa y en las razones que me llevaron a hacer lo que hice.
YAEL
ยฟY a quรฉ conclusiรณn llegaste?
HASAN
La violencia no arregla nada. Es responder a una injusticia con otra injusticia.
Silencio.
YAEL
Tenรญa veintidรณs aรฑos.
HASAN
Yo tambiรฉn.
YAEL
Era mi primer viaje a Londres.
HASAN
Tambiรฉn el mรญo.
YAEL
Despuรฉs de eso, no me atrevรญ a volver. Es la primera vez que vengo desde entonces.
HASAN
Yo, como verรกs, quedรฉ atrapado aquรญ.
YAEL saca una fotografรญa de un sobre. Se la enseรฑa.
YAEL
Mirรก, รฉsta era yo, en ese entonces
YAEL
(Cont.) Me acuerdo que te vi cuando bajaba del รณmnibus. Llevabas un bolso negro. Nuestras miradas se cruzaron. Supe que ibas a hacer algo. Se lo comentรฉ a uno de mis compaรฑeros.
HASAN
No me acuerdo mucho de los detalles. Estaba muy nervioso. Todo el cuerpo me temblaba.
YAEL
(Saca otra foto del sobre.) Esta es Nirit. La chica que mataste. ยฟQuerรฉs verla?
HASAN toma la foto, la estudia unos instantes, inexpresivo, y se la devuelve sin decir nada.
YAEL
(Cont.) Tenรญa veinticinco aรฑos. Estaba a punto de casarse. (Pausa.) Todavรญa me siento muy culpable con ella.
HASAN
ยฟPor quรฉ te sentรญs culpable?
YAEL
Porque nunca fui a visitar a sus padres. Lo fui postergando y postergando y al final ya me daba vergรผenza. Estรกbamos una al lado de la otra. La muerta podรญa haber sido yo. (Pausa.) ยฟTe incomoda que hable de todo esto?
HASAN
Ya te lo dije, soy otra persona. El Hasรกn que cometiรณ esos crรญmenes no existe mรกs.
YAEL
ยฟDe verdad pensรกs eso?
HASAN
ยฟQuรฉ cosa?
YAEL
Que quien hizo todo aquello es otra persona.
HASAN
Sรญ. Claro que lo pienso. (Pausa.) No fue fรกcil. Nada fue fรกcil. Me tomรณ muchos aรฑos comprenderlo. (Recoge la fotografรญa de YAEL.) Esta es la que eras entonces y รฉsta es la que sos hoy. Pensรก en todo lo que hiciste desde entonces. Las cosas que te pasaron. Tuviste novios, te casaste, tuviste hijos, viajaste, fuiste al cine, a bailar. Yo no hice nada de eso. Todo cuanto vi en estos veintidรณs aรฑos fueron las paredes de mi celda.
YAEL
Nirit no pudo ver ni siquiera eso.
HASAN: Lo lamento mucho, de verdad. ยฟQuรฉ puedo decirte? ยฟQue no pasa una noche sin que me arrepienta de lo que hice? Por lo menos, ahora estรก en paz.
YAEL
El muchacho que iba a casarse con ella quedรณ nunca pudo recuperarse.
HASAN
Todos somos vรญctimas, Yael.
*****************
YAEL
ยฟCรณmo fue que te metiste en esa operaciรณn?
HASAN
Querรญa hacer algo.
YAEL
(Con ironรญa.) ยฟHacer algo?
HASAN
Me sentรญa frustrado, lleno de rabia, impotente. ยฟAlguna vez estuviste en un campamento de refugiados?
YAEL
Estuve en varios. Durante un tiempo trabajรฉ acompaรฑando a corresponsales extranjeros a los territorios ocupados.
HASAN
Bueno, no es lo mismo. Pero sabrรกs a lo que me refiero. El hacinamiento, la basura, el barro, la humillaciรณn, la desesperanza. Esa fue mi infancia.
YAEL
ยฟDe dรณnde eran tus padres?
HASAN
De Jaffa. Toda mi familia era de allรญ. Mi viejo, mis abuelos y los abuelos de รฉl.
YAEL
ยฟQuรฉ hacรญa tu padre?
HASAN
Era comerciante. Tenรญa una mueblerรญa cerca de la Torre del Reloj. La Gran Mueblerรญa El-Fawzi. Todo el mundo la conocรญa. Mi viejo era un tipo muy respetado en la comunidad. Vivรญan en una casa grande de piedra, con un gran jardรญn donde crecรญan รกrboles frutales. Pero cuando los judรญos llegaron en el 48, tuvieron que dejarlo todo y escapar. Nunca les permitieron volver.
Terminaron en un campamento de refugiados en Ramallah. Ahรญ nacรญ yo. (Pausa.) ยฟY vos?
YAEL
ยฟYo?
HASAN
ยฟDรณnde naciste?
YAEL
En Tel Aviv.
HASAN
ยฟY tus padres? ยฟDe dรณnde vinieron?
YAEL
Mi padre naciรณ en Haifa; mi madre en Tel Aviv. Yo soy la quinta generaciรณn.
HASAN
(Sorprendido.) ยฟDe veras?
YAEL
ยฟTe asombra?
HASAN
Yo creรญ que todos los judรญos venรญan de Europa.
YAEL
Pues estรกs mal informado.
Pausa.
HASAN
Estoy seguro que tu infancia fue mucho mejor que la mรญa.
YAEL
Seguramente.
HASAN
La vida en el campamento era un infierno. No podรฉs imaginarte. Mi viejo nunca se recuperรณ de la Nakba, de la catรกstrofe. Siempre fue un tipo muy orgulloso. No pudo soportar verse de repente convertido en un refugiado, viviendo de las limosnas de las Naciones Unidas. Primero vino la depresiรณn, despuรฉs la bebida y despuรฉs la violencia. Cualquier discusiรณn, cualquier incidente por insignificante que fuera, era motivo para que nos golpease a mi madre y a mรญ. (Pausa.) Lo รบnico que lo mantenรญa vivo era su odio a los sionistas, que lo habรญan despojado de sus bienes y de su dignidad, y la esperanza de algรบn dรญa poder regresar a Jaffa. Pero era demasiado cobarde para rebelarse, asรญ que pasaba la mayor parte del tiempo borracho y sacaba su resentimiento con nosotros.
YAEL
ยฟQuerรญas a tu padre?
HASAN
ยฟSi lo querรญa? No, no lo querรญa. Lo odiaba. Al รบnico que querรญa de verdad era a mi abuelo. Era un hombre muy dulce. Me contaba historias.
YAEL
ยฟQuรฉ clase de historias?
HASAN
De joven se habรญa ido a la Argentina y me contaba cosas de allรก. Muriรณ cuando yo tenรญa diez aรฑos, pero me acuerdo de todas las cosas que me contaba.
Despuรฉs de la muerte de mi abuelo, mi viejo se puso insoportable. Yo trataba de mantenerme lo mรกs lejos posible de รฉl.
YAEL
ยฟQuรฉ hacรญas?
HASAN
Pasaba todo el dรญa en la calle con mi amigo Bashir. Jugรกbamos a la pelota entre los escombros y nos metรญamos entre las montaรฑas de basura a buscar tesoros. Hacรญamos planes de irnos a recorrer el mundo, como mi abuelo. Mirรก.
Del interior de su camisa saca una pรกgina de revista arrugada. La despliega y la alisa frente a YAEL.
HASAN
(Cont.) ยฟSabรฉs quรฉ es esto?
YAEL
No.
HASAN
Tierra del Fuego.
YAEL
ยฟTierra del Fuego?
HASAN
Ahรญ es donde viviรณ mi abuelo. ยฟSabรฉs dรณnde queda?
YAEL
No estoy segura. Lejos.
HASAN
Muy lejos. Es donde se juntan los dos ocรฉanos, el Atlรกntico y el Pacรญfico. Estuve leyendo mucho sobre esto en la biblioteca de la prisiรณn. Leo todo lo que puedo. Trato de educarme. Ahรญ รญbamos a irnos con Bashir, a Tierra del Fuego. En mi celda tengo un mapa enorme que pintรฉ sobre la pared. (Dibuja con el dedo sobre la mesa.) El estrecho de Magallanes, el Cabo de Hornos, Usuahia.
YAEL
ยฟPor quรฉ Tierra del Fuego?
HASAN
Porque es el fin del mundo. ยกImaginate, llegar al fin del mundo! Ibamos a meternos a marineros y asรญ llegar hasta allรญ. Mi abuelo me contaba que hay ballenas y lobos de mar y bosques subterrรกneos y grutas submarinas. Y que el aire es tan puro que marea.
Silencio. YAEL estudia la foto.
**********************
YAEL
ยฟQuรฉ sentiste al disparar contra nosotros?
HASAN
ยกQuรฉ se yo! ยฟPara quรฉ querรฉs saberlo?
YAEL
Quiero saberlo. Es importante.
HASAN
ยฟImportante para quiรฉn?
YAEL
Para mรญ. Para vos.
HASAN
No me acuerdo.
YAEL
No te creo.
HASAN
De veras que no me acuerdo.
YAEL
Hacรฉ un esfuerzo.
Pausa.
HASAN
(Repentinamente, intenso.) Odio. Sentรญ odio.
YAEL
ยฟCรณmo se puede odiar lo que no se conoce?
HASAN
Conocรญa los uniformes. No importa quiรฉn los llevaba.
YAEL
Todas las tripulaciones llevan uniformes. No รฉramos soldados.
HASAN
Una ocupaciรณn no se mantiene solamente con soldados. Todos colaboran. Por lo tanto, todos son responsables.
***********
Ya le dije: no lo sรฉ. Lo sabrรฉ cuando esto termine o tal vez no lo sabrรฉ nunca. Evidentemente, tenรญa necesidad de hacerlo. Mi vida cambiรณ despuรฉs del atentado. Vivรญa en un estado constante de ansiedad. ยกAumentรฉ veinticinco kilos en el primer aรฑo! Sufrรญa de insomnio y cuando lograba dormir, tenรญa unas pesadillas espantosas. Todavรญa me cuesta dormir mรกs de dos o tres horas. Los mรฉdicos me diagnosticaron Trastorno por estrรฉs postraumรกtico. Estoy condenada a tomar pastillas el resto de mi vida. Al principio sentรญ un gran resentimiento hacia los รกrabes. Me producรญa nรกuseas cruzarme con alguno por la calle. Pero despuรฉs de la primera invasiรณn al Lรญbano empecรฉ a ver las cosas desde otra perspectiva. Esa no era una guerra defensiva. La imagen de Arik Sharon montado sobre un tanque mirando a travรฉs de un largavista cรณmo la artillerรญa israelรญ bombardeaba Beirut me sacudiรณ. Despuรฉs vino la masacre de Sabra y Shatila y me enfermรฉ. Pasรฉ semanas en cama en una depresiรณn profunda. Estaba como paralizada. No podรญa pararme ni mover los brazos. Mi familia no sabรญa quรฉ hacer. Finalmente, mi marido decidiรณ que nos fuรฉramos a los Estados Unidos. Vivimos dos aรฑos en Nueva York, durante los cuales leรญ mucho y aprendรญ mucho. Pasaba tardes enteras en la biblioteca, devorando libros como si estuviera poseรญda. Descubrรญ que habรญa crecido entre mentiras y mitos y que tambiรฉn los palestinos habรญan crecido entre mentiras y mitos, y que los polรญticos de ambos lados nos han estado mintiendo y envenenando y avivando el odio hacia el otro. Decidรญ que si volvรญa a Israel serรญa para trabajar por la paz, por el entendimiento. Es lo que hice.
*******************
HASAN
Pasรณ que un dรญa entendรญ.
YAEL
ยฟY eso cuรกndo fue?
HASAN
Hace unos aรฑos, cuando conocรญ a Joska, el polaco.
YAEL
ยฟA quiรฉn?
HASAN
Joska, el polaco. Es un preso, como yo. Trabaja en la biblioteca. Creo que es judรญo. No estoy seguro. El sabรญa bien quiรฉn era yo y quรฉ habรญa hecho, pero nunca dijo nada. No hablamos mucho; apenas lo necesario. Al principio, yo pedรญa los libros y รฉl me los traรญa. Seguramente le llamรณ la atenciรณn que pidiera libros sobre la Segunda Guerra Mundial. Un dรญa me acercรณ uno y me dijo que lo leyera. El autor era uno de los comandantes de la resistencia judรญa en Varsovia. Marek Edelman, ยฟEscuchaste hablar de รฉl?
YAEL
No sรฉ. Creo que sรญ.
HASAN
Uno de los pocos que quedaron vivos. Me leรญ el libro en una noche. No podรญa parar. Por primera vez entendรญ por lo que habรญan pasado los judรญos durante la guerra. Tambiรฉn me di cuenta que la lucha de ellos era muy parecida a la nuestra. No tenรญan ninguna esperanza, pero peleaban igual, por su dignidad. Peleaban con revรณlveres, con cuchillos, con bombas Molotov contra un ejรฉrcito que tenรญa caรฑones, tanques y aviones. Nosotros hacemos lo mismo.
ยฟNo te parece una ironรญa? Y este Edelman era un hรฉroe de verdad, un gigante. Cuando terminรณ la guerra no quiso emigrar a Israel. Eligiรณ quedarse en Polonia. Ahรญ habรญa nacido y reclamaba el derecho de seguir viviendo ahรญ. (Pausa.) Habรญa algo que รฉl decรญa que me quedรณ grabado. (Recita:) โPeleรกbamos con una determinaciรณn sin esperanza pero nuestras armas nunca fueron dirigidas contra la poblaciรณn civil indefensa, nunca matamos mujeres o niรฑos. En un mundo despojado de principios y de valores, a pesar del constante peligro de muerte, nosotros permanecimos fieles a estos valores y a estos principios morales.โ ยฟVos preguntรกs quรฉ me cambiรณ? Ese libro me cambiรณ.
This work is essentially a work of fiction. Many of the episodes and references are based on real events in Yulie Cohen’s life, but others are invented or imagined. All scenes take place in 2000, except for the last one, which happens in 2005.
__________________________________________
Darkness. Machine gun fire is heard, and flashes of light, similar to tracer bullets, cross the scene. More gunfire. Police and ambulance sirens wail. Murmurs of horror. Screams.
TV ANNOUNCER
โThe attackers opened fire with machine guns and threw grenades as the 21 crew members of El Al Flight 061, arriving from New York, were about to enter the Europa Hotel in the British capital. One of the terrorists died instantly when one of the grenades he was carrying exploded prematurely. The other terrorist, 22-year-old Hassan el-Fawzi, was arrested moments later. One of the flight attendants, 25-year-old Nirit Golan, was killed in the attack. Another flight attendant, 22-year-old Yael Allon, was wounded.โ
The lights come on.
YAEL is waiting in the small room, seated at a table on the top floor. There’s an empty chair on the opposite side. An invisible door opens and HASAN enters. He observes her for a moment and sits down opposite her, his hands hidden behind the table.
YAEL
Hello. I’m Yael.
HASAN
I’m Hasan.
YAEL
I know. I recognize you. (She extends her hand) Nice to meet you.
HASAN
(Shyly shakes her hand in return.) Nice to meet you too.
Pause.
YAEL
How are you?
HASAN
You can see that. (Pause.) And you?
YAEL
Nervous. It’s natural.
Pause.
HASAN
Did you have a good trip?
YAEL
Yes, very good.
Pause.
YAEL
(Cont.) You shouldn’t receive many visitors.
HASAN
No.
YAEL
Don’t you have any family?
HASAN
No. I have no one.
Pause.
YAEL
My request must have surprised you, I imagine.
HASAN
My lawyer told me you had something important to ask me.
YAEL
Well, yes. Important to me, at least.
HASAN
What is it?
YAEL
(Gathering courage.) Twenty-three years ago you tried to kill me, so I decided to come here so you could explain why.
Silence.
HASAN
I didn’t try to kill you.
YAEL
I still have a rather ugly scar on my arm. (She shows it to him.) And you killed my friend Nirit.
HASAN
I didn’t try to kill you, nor your friend. I tried to kill what they represented.
YAEL
What we represented?
HASAN
The enemy, the occupation. (He composes himself.) But that was a long time ago. I’m not the same person anymore.
YAEL remains silent.
HASAN
(Cont.) I had a lot of time to think. That’s what you do here. Think. Sometimes you think so much you feel like your head is going to explode.
YAEL
And what did you think about?
HASAN
Many things. I thought about what happened that day and the reasons that led me to do what I did.
YAEL
And what conclusion did you reach?
HASAN
Violence doesn’t solve anything. It’s responding to injustice with another injustice.
Silence.
YAEL
I was twenty-two years old.
HASAN
Me too.
YAEL
It was my first trip to London.
HASAN
Mine too.
YAEL
After that, I didn’t dare to return. This is the first time I’ve been here since.
HASAN
As you can see, I’m trapped here.
YAEL takes a photograph out of an envelope. He shows it to her.
YAEL
Look, this was me back then.
YAEL
(Cont.) I remember seeing you when I got off the bus. You were carrying a black bag. Our eyes met. I knew you were going to do something. I told one of my classmates.
HASAN
I don’t remember many details. I was very nervous. My whole body was shaking.
YAEL
(Takes another photo out of the envelope.) This is Nirit. The girl you killed. Do you want to see her?
HASAN takes the photo, studies it for a few moments, expressionless, and hands it back without saying anything.
YAEL
(Cont.) I was twenty-five years old. I was about to get married. (Pause.) I still feel very guilty about her.
HASAN
Why do you feel guilty?
YAEL
Because I never went to visit her parents. I kept putting it off, and in the end, I was ashamed. We were right next to each other. I could have been the one who died. (Pause.) Does it bother you that I’m talking about all this?
HASAN
I already told you, I’m a different person. The Hasan who committed those crimes doesn’t exist anymore.
YAEL
Do you really think that?
HASAN
What?
YAEL
That the person who did all that is someone else.
HASAN
Yes. Of course I think that. (Pause.) It wasn’t easy. Nothing was easy. It took me many years to understand. (He picks up Yael’s photograph.) This is who you were then, and this is who you are today. Think about everything you’ve done since then. The things that have happened to you. You had boyfriends, you got married, you had children, you traveled, you went to the movies, dancing. I didn’t do any of that. All I saw in these twenty-two years were the walls of my cell.
YAEL
Nirit didn’t even get to see that.
HASAN:
I’m so sorry, truly. What can I say? That not a night goes by that I don’t regret what I did? At least she’s at peace now.
YAEL
The young man who was going to marry her never recovered.
HASAN
We’re all victims, Yael. **********YAEL
How did you get involved in that operation?
HASAN
I wanted to do something.
YAEL
(Ironically.) Do something?
HASAN
I felt frustrated, full of rage, powerless. Have you ever been in a refugee camp?
YAEL
I’ve been in several. For a while, I worked accompanying foreign correspondents to the occupied territories.
HASAN
Well, it’s not the same. But you know what I mean. The overcrowding, the garbage, the mud, the humiliation, the hopelessness. That was my childhood.
YAEL
Where were your parents from?
HASAN
Jaffa. My whole family was from there. My father, my grandparents, and his grandparents.
YAEL
What did your father do?
HASAN
He was a shopkeeper. He owned a furniture store near the Clock Tower. The Great El-Fawzi Furniture Store. Everyone knew it. My father was a very respected man in the community. They lived in a large stone house, with a big garden where fruit trees grew. But when the Jews arrived in ’48, they had to leave everything and escape. They were never allowed to return.
They ended up in a refugee camp in Ramallah. That’s where I was born. (Pause.) And you?
YAEL
Me?
HASAN
Where were you born?
YAEL
In Tel Aviv.
HASAN
And your parents? Where did they come from?
YAEL
My father was born in Haifa; my mother in Tel Aviv. I’m a fifth-generation Jew.
HASAN
(Surprised.) Really?
YAEL
Are you surprised?
HASAN
I thought all Jews came from Europe.
YAEL
Well, you’re misinformed.
Pause.
HASAN
I’m sure your childhood was much better than mine.
YAEL
Definitely.
HASAN
Life in the camp was hell. You can’t imagine. My father never recovered from the Nakba, from the catastrophe. He was always a very proud man. He couldn’t bear to suddenly find himself a refugee, living off UN handouts. First came the depression, then the drinking, and then the violence. Any argument, any incident, no matter how insignificant, was enough for him to beat my mother and me. (Pause.) The only thing that kept him going was his hatred for the Zionists, who had stripped him of his possessions and his dignity, and the hope of one day being able to return to Jaffa. But he was too cowardly to rebel, so he spent most of his time drunk and took out his resentment on us.
YAEL
Did you love your father?
HASAN
Did I love him? No, I didn’t love him. I hated him. The only person I truly loved was my grandfather. He was a very sweet man. He told me stories.
YAEL
What kind of stories?
HASAN
When he was young, he went to Argentina and told me things about it. He died when I was ten, but I remember everything he told me.
After my grandfather died, my dad became unbearable. I tried to stay as far away from him as possible.
YAEL
What did you do?
HASAN
I spent all day in the street with my friend Bashir. We played ball among the rubble and went into the mountains of garbage looking for treasure. We made plans to travel the world, like my grandfather. Look.
He takes a crumpled magazine page out of his shirt pocket. He unfolds it and smooths it out in front of YAEL.
HASAN
(Cont.) Do you know what this is?
YAEL
No.
HASAN
Tierra del Fuego.
YAEL
Tierra del Fuego?
HASAN
That’s where my grandfather lived. Do you know where it is?
YAEL
I’m not sure. Far away.
HASAN
Very far away. It’s where the two oceans meet, the Atlantic and the Pacific. I’ve been reading a lot about it in the prison library. I read everything I can. I try to educate myself. We were going to go there with Bashir, to Tierra del Fuego. In my cell, I have a huge map that I painted on the wall. (She draws with her finger on the table.) The Strait of Magellan, Cape Horn, Ushuaia.
YAEL
Why Tierra del Fuego?
HASAN
Because it’s the end of the world. Imagine, reaching the end of the world! We were going to become sailors and get there. My grandfather told me that there are whales and sea lions and underground forests and underwater caves. And that the air is so pure it makes you dizzy.
*************
The prison room. YAEL and HASAN are sitting facing each other, as in the previous scene.
YAEL
What did you feel when you shot at us?
HASAN
How should I know! Why do you want to know?
YAEL
I want to know. It’s important.
HASAN
Important to whom?
YAEL
To me. To you.
HASAN
I don’t remember.
YAEL
I don’t believe you.
HASAN
I really don’t remember.
YAEL
Try to remember.
Pause.
HASAN
(Suddenly, intensely.) Hate. I felt hate.
YAEL
How can you hate what you don’t know?
HASAN
I knew the uniforms. It doesn’t matter who wore them.
YAEL
All the crews wear uniforms. We weren’t soldiers.
HASAN
An occupation isn’t sustained by soldiers alone. Everyone collaborates. Therefore, everyone is responsible.
************
YAEL
I already told you: I don’t know. I’ll know when this is over, or maybe I’ll never know. Obviously, I needed to do it. My life changed after the attack. I lived in a constant state of anxiety. I gained 25 kilos in the first year! I suffered from insomnia, and when I did manage to sleep, I had terrible nightmares. I still struggle to sleep more than two or three hours. The doctors diagnosed me with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. I’m condemned to take pills for the rest of my life. At first, I felt a great deal of resentment toward Arabs. It made me nauseous to pass one on the street. But after the first invasion of Lebanon, I began to see things from a different perspective. That wasn’t a defensive war. The image of Arik Sharon on top of a tank, looking through binoculars as Israeli artillery bombarded Beirut, shook me to my core. Then came the Sabra and Shatila massacre, and I became ill. I spent weeks in bed in a deep depression. I was paralyzed. I couldn’t stand or move my arms. My family didn’t know what to do. Finally, my husband decided we should go to the United States. We lived in New York for two years, during which I read a lot and learned a great deal. I spent entire afternoons in the library, devouring books as if possessed. I discovered that I had grown up surrounded by lies and myths, and that the Palestinians had also grown up surrounded by lies and myths, and that politicians on both sides had been lying to us, poisoning our minds, and stoking hatred toward each other. I decided that if I returned to Israel, it would be to work for peace, for understanding. That’s what I did.
***********
HASAN
It happened that one day I understood.
YAEL
And when was that?
HASAN
A few years ago, when I met Joska, the Pole.
YAEL
Who?
HASAN
Joska, the Pole. He’s a prisoner, like me. He works in the library. I think he’s Jewish. I’m not sure. He knew perfectly well who I was and what I had done, but he never said anything. We didn’t talk much; just enough. At first, I would ask for books and he would bring them to me. He was probably intrigued that I asked for books about World War II. One day he handed me one and told me to read it. The author was one of the commanders of the Jewish resistance in Warsaw. Marek Edelman. Have you heard of him?
YAEL
I don’t know. I think so.
HASAN
One of the few who survived. I read the book in one night. I couldn’t stop. For the first time, I understood what the Jews had gone through during the war. I also realized that their struggle was very similar to ours. They had no hope, but they fought anyway, for their dignity. They fought with revolvers, with knives, with Molotov cocktails against an army that had cannons, tanks, and airplanes. We do the same.
Don’t you find that ironic? And this Edelman was a true hero, a giant. When the war ended, he didn’t want to emigrate to Israel. He chose to stay in Poland. He was born there and claimed the right to continue living there. (Pause.) There was something he said that stuck with me. (Recites:) โWe fought with hopeless determination, but our weapons were never directed against the defenseless civilian population; we never killed women or children. In a world stripped of principles and values, despite the constant danger of death, we remained true to these values โโand these moral principles.โ You ask what changed me? That book changed me.
Liliana Mizrahi, nacida en Buenos Aires, Argentina en 1943. Desde 2004, colabora con la pรกgina Mujeres sin Fronteras, escribiendo una columna mensual. Desde 2006 es columnista de radio. Ha publicado notas periodรญsticas en Tiempo Argentino, La Razรณn y Pรกgina 12. Y en Revistas: El Porteรฑo, Para Ti, Claudia, Viva y otras. Premio Coca-Cola para las Artes y las Ciencias, menciรณn en poesรญa, 1983. Recibiรณ en 1988, la Beca Nacional de Poesรญa otorgada por el Fondo Nacional de las Artes. Menciรณn de Honor en Poesรญa del Fondo Nacional de las Artes, 1995. Fue finalista del concurso de poesรญa del diario La Naciรณn 1995. Sus poemas fueron traducidos al francรฉs, al inglรฉs y al hebreo.
Obras:
La Mujer Transgresora, Las Mujeres y La Culpa, Mujeres en Plena Revuelta, Madres en Desuso, Libro De Humor, Ilustrado, Los Mรกgicos Juegos, Bautismos y Fundaciones, Hembras del Ave del Paraรญso, Quiรฉn me Matรณ Madre
_______________________________________
Liliana Mizrahi was born in Buenos Aires, Argentina, in 1943. Since 2004, she has contributed to the website “Mujeres sin Fronteras,” writing a monthly column. Since 2006, she has been a radio columnist. She has published articles in Tiempo Argentino, La Razรณn, and Pรกgina 12, and in magazines such as El Porteรฑo, Para Ti, Claudia, Viva, and others. She received the Coca-Cola Award for the Arts and Sciences, with a mention in poetry, 1983. In 1988, Mizrahi received the National Poetry Fellowship from the National Endowment for the Arts. She gained and Honorable Mention in Poetry from the National Endowment for the Arts, 1995. She was a Finalist in the 1995 La Naciรณn newspaper poetry contest. Her poems have been translated into French, English, and Hebrew. Works:
La Mujer Transgresora, Las Mujeres y La Culpa, Mujeres en Plena Revuelta, Madres en Desuso, Libro De Humor, Ilustrado, Los Mรกgicos Juegos, Bautismos y Fundaciones, Hembras del Ave del Paraรญso, Quiรฉn me Matรณ Madre
____________________________________________
____________________________
El cantar de los cantares, una รฉtica del amor*
ยฟA quiรฉn llamar?
ยฟA quiรฉn llamar en el camino
tan alto y tan
desierto?
JACOBO FIJMAN, El canto del cisne
Ser una escritora judรญa y sefaradรญ es una experiencia compleja. Implica, al menos para mรญ, asumir exigencias, reconocer ambigรผedades y recorrer laberintos.
A veces, el pasado oriental de mis abuelos y de mis padres se me escapa de las manos. Damasco o Estambul se convierten en la oscura memoria de un origen que funda la precoz conciencia de ser una extraรฑa. A veces, tambiรฉn desespero de la tierra prometida.
Mis ensayos tratan de la mujer y la transgresiรณn, del amor y la soledad. Intentan descifrar.
Las mujeres y la culpa a afectividad que se nutre de voces ancestrales que me incitan a la ruptura de mandatos: el silencio, la pasividad, la secundariedad o el sometimiento.
Mi necesidad de ser una mujer transgresora se realimenta todos los dรญas, cada maรฑana, cuando los varones rezan:
โGracias Dios mรญo, por no haberme hecho mujerโ.
A esa hora, me convierto en Lilith, en Eva, en Dรฉbora o en Judith. Y pienso: no convirtamos este universo en un gran destierro. No amputemos mรกs cuerpos ni mรกs geografรญas. Tratemos de achicar el repertorio de estereotipos y prejuicios.
Los varones ortodoxos repiten esta oraciรณn desde la presunciรณn de que han sido liberados de una situaciรณn precaria.
No quiero tener mรกs en contra de mรญ a mis propios judรญos y tampoco a los hombres de otros pueblos que en nombre de las mismas ideas persiguen y denigran.
Esa doble servidumbre; la dependencia de las fuerzas hostiles del mundo que nos rodea y de los propios hermanos que paradojalmente forman una extraรฑa coaliciรณn.
Sรฉ tambiรฉn de mis propios prejuicios y estereotipos contra los que lucho por constituirme la mujer de Lot; Sara, la estรฉril o la que engaรฑa al enemigo; soy Ester y soy Rebeca. Busquรฉ a estas mujeres para apropiarme de ellas, no para ser una destinataria fatรญdica de versiones heredadas.
El discurso bรญblico me constituye, aunque me cueste reconocerlo; habla a travรฉs de mรญ y de cada uno de nosotros. Entiendo entonces que se trata de conocerse y reconocerse en las propias resistencias y dificultades. Tengo que sostener el coraje de balbucear, fundar silencios y romper viejos condicionamientos. Mis ensayos tambiรฉn se aproximan al tema del cambio.
El pueblo judรญo, en su larga historia, ha atravesado por transformaciones que significaron verdaderas mutaciones y acerca de las cuales la literatura bรญblica, por suerte, ha dejado constancia. Cambio, para mรญ, es metamorfosis. Mutaciรณn de valores. Incursiรณn en lo desconocido; comprometerse con hechos futuros que no son previsibles y enfrentar sus consecuencias. Este encuentro de escritores judรญos me sorprende sumergida literariamente en el tema del amor.
Elegรญ entonces una pareja: la Sulamita y el rey Salomรณn. Elegรญ un poema: โEl cantar de los cantaresโ. Y los elijo porque sobre la base de la transgresiรณn que ellos dramatizan se constituye una รฉtica del amor basada en la libertad y la autonomรญa de ambos, quizรกs por primera vez en la literatura amorosa universal.
El cantar de los cantares. Me pregunto: ยฟno serรก que una de las claves del amor, y que creo vislumbrar en la Sulamita y Salomรณn, es comprender a tiempo que todos los vรญnculos estรกn hechos para deshacerse?
Entonces pienso en su opuesto: la separaciรณn, en el mundo de las almas, no existe. Dice Salomรณn en el Eclesiastรฉs:
โPara todas las cosas hay sazรณn
y todo lo que se quiere debajo del cielo tiene su tiempo:
โTiempo de nacer y tiempo de morir.
โTiempo de abrazar
y tiempo de alejarse de abrazar. โ
Tiempo de amar y tiempo de aborrecer. una รฉtica del amor basada en la libertad y la autonomรญa de ambos, quizรกs por primera vez en la literatura amorosa universal.
โTiempo de guerra y tiempo de paz.โ Esta sagrada pareja, tan polรฉmica para la ortodoxia religiosa, nutre esta extraรฑa paradoja en la que estoy meditando. No afirmo. Interrogo.
Me aproximo a un tema y por ahora lo dejo abierto. Pienso que el amor es cosa de gente decidida a entregarse, no un deporte cruel donde uno intenta vencer al otro. Toda posesiรณn, ademรกs de insuficiente, es inรบtil.
Esta pareja bรญblica contiene en su esencia los elementos fundantes de lo que para mรญ es una concepciรณn รฉtica del amor: el reconocimiento y la aceptaciรณn del otro como de un profundo misterio.
Este texto expresa, entre otras cosas, mi aspiraciรณn al diรกlogo, apertura al extraรฑo. En el diรกlogo se modela el espacio de una interioridad recรญproca. En la palabra, en el silencio, el amor se convierte en hogar imaginario de la vida interior de la pareja. La tensiรณn del diรกlogo en โEl cantar…โ no es dramรกtica sino lรญrica y amorosamente cultivada. La temรกtica erรณtica, en este poema, queda fuertemente unida a la ausencia:
โCorre, amado mรญoโ, dice la Sulamita.
El rey huye de la fusiรณn: โEn el lecho, entre sueรฑos, por la noche busquรฉ al amado y no le hallรฉโ. Aun en la fugacidad de la presencia no temen la incertidumbre. Paradojalmente, lo inasible del amante se convierte en plenitud de certezas.
El texto bรญblico nuevamente confirma y realimenta mis ensayos. Nuevamente me constituye y habla. No podrรญa estar pensando en una รฉtica del amor que no se apoyara en una concepciรณn de la soledad como plenitud del conocimiento y del encuentro con uno mismo. โEl amor consiste en que dos soledades mutuamente se protejan, se limiten y se reverencienโ, dice Rilke.
Me nutre la polรฉmica lectura que se puede hacer de esta obra. Julia Kristeva, en el ensayo “Una santa locura”, ella y รฉl, plantea la convergencia de una mentalidad judรญa religiosa, ideologรญa guardiana de su identidad, una estรฉtica pagana y algunos signos del esoterismo y las religiones y algunos signos del esoterismo y las religiones encarnadas. El Cantar se convierte en sagrado en cuanto contiene deseo y Dios. Se trata entonces de aprender a verlos juntos como parte de la aventura amorosa bรญblica.
Se ha legitimado lo imposible. La transgresiรณn se ha convertido en ley de amor. La verdad es poesรญa. A travรฉs de la transgresiรณn me reconcilio con lo que para mรญ es lo mejor del judaรญsmo y encuentro en รฉste un espacio alentador para mi propio despliegue.
Me adueรฑo y recreo la tradiciรณn a travรฉs de la conquista, cada maรฑana, de mi propia libertad. Como una vieja oraciรณn a rezar, cuyas palabras se deletrean con exactitud, pienso: que este discurso bรญblico que hoy nos convoca sirva para unir, para olvidar y para aprender a abrirnos y amar de nuevo, lo desconocido, lo extraรฑo.
* Presentado por primera vez en el Segundo Diรกlogo de Escritores Judeo Argentinos y Latinoamericanos, Buenos Aires, 1988.
_______________________________________________
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The Song of Songs, an Ethics of Love*
Who to Call?
Who to Call on the Road
so High and So
deserted?
JACOBO FIJMAN, Swan Song
Being a Jewish and Sephardic writer is a complex experience. It involves, at least for me, assuming demands, recognizing ambiguities, and navigating labyrinths.
Sometimes, the Eastern past of my grandparents and parents slips through my fingers. Damascus or Istanbul become the dark memory of an origin that grounds the precocious awareness of being a stranger. Sometimes, I also despair of the Promised Land.
My essays deal with women and transgression, with love and loneliness. They attempt to decipher.
Women and the guilt of an affectivity that feeds on ancestral voices that incite me to break mandates: silence, passivity, secondary importance, or submission.
My need to be a transgressive woman is rekindled every day, every morning, when the Orthodox men pray:
“Thank you, my God, for not having made me a woman.”
At that hour, I become Lilith, Eve, Deborah, or Judith. And I think: let’s not turn this universe into a great exile. Let’s not amputate more bodies or more geographies. Let’s try to narrow down the repertoire of stereotypes and prejudices.
The men repeat this prayer from the presumption that they have been liberated from a precarious situation.
I no longer want to have my own Jews against me, nor the men of other peoples who, in the name of the same ideas, persecute and denigrate me.
That double servitude: the dependence on the hostile forces of the world around us and on our own brothers who, paradoxically, form a strange coalition.
I also know of my own prejudices and stereotypes, against which I struggle to become Lot’s wife; Sarah, the barren one; or the one who deceives the enemy; I am Esther and I am Rebekah. I sought out these women to make them my own, not to be a fateful recipient of inherited versions.
The biblical discourse constitutes me, even if I find it hard to recognize it; it speaks through me and through each of us. I understand then that it’s about knowing and recognizing oneself in one’s own resistances and difficulties. I must maintain the courage to stammer, to establish silences, and to break old conditioning. My essays also approach the theme of change.
The Jewish people, in their long history, have undergone transformations that represented true mutations and about which biblical literature, fortunately, has left a record.
Change, for me, is metamorphosis. A mutation of values. A foray into the unknown; committing to future events that are not foreseeable and facing their consequences. This meeting of Jewish writers surprises me, literarily immersed in the theme of love.
I then chose a couple: the Shulamite and King Solomon. I chose a poem: “The Song of Songs.” And I chose them because, based on the transgression they dramatize, an ethic of love is constructed based on the freedom and autonomy of both, perhaps for the first time in universal love literature.
The Song of Songs. I wonder: could it be that one of the keys to love, which I think I glimpse in the Shulamite and Solomon, is understanding in time that all bonds are made to be broken?
Then I think of its opposite: separation, in the world of souls, does not exist. Solomon says in Ecclesiastes:
“To everything there is a season,
and a time to every purpose under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die.
A time to embrace,
and a time to turn away from embracing.”
A time to love, and a time to hate. An ethic of love based on the freedom and autonomy of both, perhaps for the first time in universal love literature.
โA time of war and a time of peace.โ This sacred couple, so controversial for religious orthodoxy, nourishes this strange paradox I am meditating on. I don’t affirm; I question.
I am approaching a theme and for now I leave it open. I think love is a matter of people determined to surrender, not a cruel sport where one tries to defeat the other. All possession, besides being insufficient, is useless.
This biblical couple contains in its essence the founding elements of what for me is an ethical conception of love: the recognition and acceptance of the other as a profound mystery. This text expresses, among other things, my aspiration for dialogue, openness to the stranger. In dialogue, the space of reciprocal interiority is modeled. In words, in silence, love becomes the imaginary home of the couple’s inner life. The tension of the dialogue in โThe Song of Songsโฆโ is not dramatic but lyrical and lovingly cultivated. The erotic theme in this poem is strongly linked to absence:
โRun, my beloved,โ says the Shulamite.
The king flees from fusion: โOn my bed, between dreams, at night I sought my beloved and did not find him.โ Even in the fleetingness of presence, they do not fear uncertainty. Paradoxically, the elusiveness of the lover becomes a plenitude of certainty.
The biblical text once again confirms and nourishes my essays. Once again it constitutes and speaks to me. I could not be thinking about an ethics of love that did not rest on a conception of solitude as the plenitude of knowledge and the encounter with oneself. โLove consists in two solitudes mutually protecting, limiting, and revering one another,โ says Rilke.
I am nourished by the polemical interpretation that can be made of this work. Julia Kristeva, in her essay “A Holy Madness, She and He,” raises the convergence of a religious Jewish mentality, an ideology that guards its identity, a pagan aesthetic, and some signs of esotericism and incarnated religions. The Song becomes sacred insofar as it contains desire and God. It is then a matter of learning to see them together as part of the biblical love adventure.
The impossible has been legitimized. Transgression has become the law of love. Truth is poetry. Through transgression, I reconcile myself with what for me is the best of Judaism and find in it an encouraging space for my own unfolding.
I take ownership of and recreate tradition through the conquest, each morning, of my own freedom. Like an old prayer to be recited, whose words are spelled out precisely, I think: may this biblical discourse that calls us together today serve to unite, to forget, and to learn to open ourselves and love again, the unknown, the strange.
* First Presented at the Second Dialogue of Jewish-Argentine and Latin American Writers, Buenos Aires, 1988.
Mi nombre es Denise Leรณn. Nacรญ en Tucumรกn, Argentina, en 1974. Soy descendiente de inmigrantes sefardรญes. He publicado Poemas de Estambul (2008); El trayecto de la herida (2011); El saco de Douglas (2011); Templo de pescadores (2013); Sala de espera (2013); Poemas de Middlebury (2014), Mesa de pรกjaros (2019) y รrbol que tiembla (2022). He participado en varios festivales internacionales de poesรญa como el Festival Federal de la Palabra (2015) y el Festival Internacional de Poesรญa de Buenos Aires (2015). Mis poemas han sido incluidos en varias antologรญas como Por mi boka (2013) y Penรบltimos. 33 poetas de Argentina 1965-1985 (2015), y han sido traducidos al inglรฉs y al portuguรฉs. Tengo un doctorado en Literatura Latinoamericana y trabajo como investigador en CONICET (Consejo de Investigaciones Cientรญficas y Tรฉcnicas). Actualmente doy clases en los departamentos de Literatura Latinoamericana de la Universidad Nacional de Salta y en Teorรญa de la Comunicaciรณn en la Universidad Nacional de Tucumรกn, Argentina. Mi รบltimo libro รrbol que tiembla, es un texto que intenta reconstruir los caminos de la genealogรญa a partir de recuerdos e historias de los sobrevivientes de cuatro familias sefardรญes que llegaron a establecerse en Tucumรกn a principios del siglo XX.
_____________________________
My name is Denise Leรณn. I was born in Tucumรกn, Argentina, in 1974. I am a descendant of Sephardic immigrants. I have published Poemas de Estambul (Poems from Istanbul), 2008; El trayecto de la herida (The path of the wound), 2011; El saco de Douglas (The sack of Douglas), 2011; Templo de pescadores (Temple of fishermen), 2013; Sala de espera (Waiting room), 2013; Poemas de Middlebury (Poemas from Middlebury) , 2014, Mesa de pรกjaros (Table for birds) y Bajo la luna , (Under the moon), 2019 and รrbol que tiembla, (Trembling tree), 2022. I have participated in several international poetry festivals such as the Fderal Word Festival (2015) and International Poetry Festival of Buenos Aires (2015). My poems have been included in various anthologies such as Por mi boka (2013), and Penรบltimos: 33 poets from Argentina 1965-1985 (2015), and have been translated into English and Portuguese. I have a PHD in Latin American Literature and work as a Researcher at CONICET (Council for Scientific and Technical Research). I currently teach in the departments of Latin American Literature at the National University of Salta and in Communication Theory at the National University of Tucumรกn, Argentina. My last book, รrbol que tiembla is a text that tries to rebuild the paths of genealogy from memories and stories of the survivors of four Sephardic families who came to settle in Tucumรกn at the beginning of the 20th century.
______________________
Cรณmo se hacen las cosas
1
Las mujeres deben cubrirse el pelo cuando los hombres piadosos rezan. Los hombres piadosos se tapan los ojos o se cubren la cabeza con el talit cuando rezan. Se sabe: hay gestos que se conservan y se repiten. A los hombres piadosos los distrae el pelo de las mujeres.
2
Asรญ se hace un ojal; asรญ se pega un botรณn; asรญ se hace coincidir botรณn con el ojal que acabas de hacer; no se dejan cosas sucias en la pileta de la cocina (ni siquiera un rato); asรญ se barre un rincรณn y asรญ, toda una casa; asรญ se sonrรญe a alguien que no te gusta mucho; asรญ se sonrรญe a alguien que no te gusta nada; asรญ se toca la fruta para saber que no estรก podrida o rancia. Los verduleros son todos tramposos.
3
Necesito dormir pero el sol me despierta. Me hice grande pero mi madre es mรกs grande y serรก siempre asรญ.
4
Tu rostro oscuro y verde se asoma como un hacha como un barranco como un precipicio.
Ruega por mรญ.
No quiero que me toquen las mujeres que usan mi nombre en diminutivo ni el ojo de los mรฉdicos ni el poder de la ciencia. Los timbres de mi voz estรกn hรบmedos y mis ojos se abren de una manera que no les conocรญa. No quiero ser tocada por los sueรฑos.
5
Abren la canilla para limpiarme el mal. Todas las lรกgrimas de mi vida vuelven a mis ojos. Tengo que ser fiel a algo pero no necesariamente a los hechos. A la siesta, el aire era espeso y dulce y entre las sillas caรญdas, el rรญo crecido y los juncos comienzan a reventarse los vasos de sangre mรกs pequeรฑos de mi nariz.
6
.
La vi encender las velas y cubrirse los ojos. Vi sus manos inclinarse levemente encantando el humo. Vi arder las velas durante algรบn tiempo. Una de las velas titilรณ hasta agotar su espesor y mis ojos buscaron los restos de luz.
Vi tantas cosas y ahora no las recuerdo.
7
Fue enseรฑado que antes de la festividad se sacrifica ritualmente un animal salvaje o un ave. Las escuelas de sabios discuten aรบn cรณmo se debe cubrir su sangre. Todavรญa recuerdo la gente alrededor, las paredes blancas de la casa y la mirada del gallo ahogรกndose lentamente en el esfuerzo de una desesperaciรณn sin objeto. Conozco bien su mirada de asfixia conozco bien su mirada de sangre conozco bien su mirada de gallo.
8
Voy de la mano de mi madre a tomar el tranvรญa. Nos subimos y me quedo asรญ, quieta, como un cuerpo tendido sobre un colchรณn, latiendo El tranvรญa hace mucho ruido y se mueve hacia los costados. Pero este tranvรญa no se mueve.
9
Como un animal perseguido que se percibe otro en su sombra y salta el cerco -no por saltar sino para estar del otro lado- asรญ salto las palabras sรณlo para apurarlas sรณlo para estar del otro lado.
Los chicos no saben.
Y no tienen por quรฉ saber.
Esto han hecho conmigo. Quiero gritar: esto han hecho con mi cuerpo. Esto han hecho con mis venas que bajan flotando -sosegadamente- como un pรกjaro, como una red de pesca lanzada al mediodรญa.
Y la sombras crecen -de prisa- en el agua: podemos rasgarlas pero no desaparecen.
Esto han hecho conmigo. Quiero gritar pero los chicos no saben.
Luisa, 1914
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“How Things Are Done”
1
Women must cover their hair when pious men pray. Pious men cover their eyes or cover their heads with the tallit when they pray. It is known: there are gestures that are preserved and repeated. Pious men are distracted by women’s hair.
_____________________
2
This is how you make a buttonhole; This is how you sew on a button; This is how you match a button to the buttonhole you just made; You don’t leave dirty things in the kitchen sink (not even for a while); This is how you sweep a corner, and thus, a whole house; This is how you smile at someone you don’t like very much; This is how you smile at someone you don’t like at all; This is how you touch fruit to know it’s not rotten or stale. The greengrocers are all cheats.
3
I need to sleep, but the sun wakes me up. I grew up, but my mother is older and it will always be so.
4
Your dark, green face looms like an axe like a ravine like a precipice.
Pray for me.
I don’t want to be touched by women who use my name as a diminutive nor by the eye of doctors nor by the power of science. The timbres of my voice are moist and my eyes open in a way I’ve never known before. I don’t want to be touched by dreams.
5
They turn on the tap to cleanse me of evil. All the tears of my life return to my eyes. I have to be faithful to something, but not necessarily to the facts. At siesta time, the air was thick and sweet, and between the fallen chairs, the swollen river, and the reeds, the smallest blood vessels in my nose begin to burst.
6
I saw her light the candles and cover her eyes. I saw her hands bend slightly, enchanting the smoke. I watched the candles burn for some time. One of the candles flickered until it burned out, and my eyes searched for the remnants of light.
I saw so many things, and now I don’t remember them.
7
It was taught that before the festival, a wild animal or a bird is ritually sacrificed. The schools of sages still debate how its blood should be covered. I still remember the people around, the white walls of the house, and the look of the rooster slowly drowning in the effort of pointless despair. I know its look of suffocation well, I know its bloody look well, I know its rooster’s look well.
8 I walk hand in hand with my mother to take the tram. We get on and I stay like that, still, like a body lying on a mattress, throbbing. The tram makes a lot of noise and moves sideways. But this tram doesn’t move.
9
Like a hunted animal that perceives another in its shadow and jumps the fence โ not to jump but to be on the other sideโ so I jump the words just to hurry them along just to be on the other side.
The kids don’t know.
And they don’t have to know.
This is what they’ve done to me.
I want to scream: this is what they’ve done to my body. This is what they’ve done to my veins that float down โ peacefully โ like a bird, like a fishing net cast at noon.
And the shadows grow โ quickly โin the water: we can tear them, but they don’t disappear.
This is what they’ve done to me. I want to scream, but the kids don’t know.
Luisa, 1914
______________________________________
Somos mรกs lentos que tu muerte y hay que acostumbrarse:
entre mis brazos se desliza un largo tren de carga y el aire vuelve a llenar los espacios donde tu cuerpo estuvo.
Todo lo que queda del grito es el aliento. Vacรญo mis bolsilos, vacรญos mis zapatos y los dejo al lado del camino.
Digo mi nombre Digo adiรณs. Una tras otra las palabras siguen viniendo.
_____________________
We’re slower than your death and we have to get used to it:
a long freight train glides through my arms and the air fills the spaces where your body once was.
All that remains of the scream is my breath. I empty my pockets, empty my shoes and leave them by the side of the road.
I say my name I say goodbye. One after another the words keep coming.
_____________________
yo acato las leyes secretas de los muertos. Voy a encontrarlo. Voy a encontrarlo. Voy a encontrarlo. Miro hacia la pared y las sombras se agigantan como dedos. Era verano. Trabajo sin parar. Era verano y mi madre me dijo no te quites los zapatos. Hasta las alfilercitas son viudas en esta sombrererรญa y acatan las leyes secretas de los muertos. Voy a encontrarlo. Cada una de las partes iguales en las que se divide el dรญa se me aprieta el corazรณn mientras las tijeras murmuran como si estuvieran rezando. Adelante. Atrรกs. Los dedos siguen al hilo. El hilo sigue los dedos. Los dedos siguen los ojos. Los ojos acatan las leyes secretas de los muertos. Este es mi precio. Voy a encontrarlo. Desde que el gallo ha cantado mi carne y mis huesos son piedra: la hora de la partida se esconde en mis labios โ mansos โ como perras.
_________________________
I obey the secret laws of the dead. I’m going to find him. I’m going to find him. I’m going to find him. I look at the wall and the shadows swell like fingers. It was summer. I work nonstop. It was summer and my mother told me not to take off my shoes. Even the little pins are widows in this hat shop and they obey the secret laws of the dead. I’m going to find him. Each of the equal parts into which the day is divided makes my heart clench while the scissors murmur as if praying. Forward. Back. The fingers follow the thread. The thread follows the fingers. The fingers follow the eyes. The eyes obey the secret laws of the dead. This is my price. I’m going to find him. Since the rooster crowed, my flesh and my bones are stone: the hour of departure hides in my lips โ meek โ like bitches.
Nascida em 1958 na Porto Alegre, no Brasil, Cรญntia Moscovich รฉ escritora, jornalista e mestre em Teoria Literรกria, tendo exercido atividades de professora, tradutora, consultora literรกria, revisora e assessora de imprensa. Dentre vรกrios prรชmios literรกrios conquistados, destaca-se o primeiro lugar no Concurso de Contos Guimarรฃes Rosa, instituรญdo em Paris. Em 1996, publicou sua primeira obra individual, “O reino das cebolas”. Um dos contos que integram a coletรขnea foi traduzido para o inglรชs e faz parte de uma antologia que reรบne escritores judeus de lรญngua portuguesa. Em 1998, ela lanรงou a novela “Duas iguais – Manual de amores e equรญvocos assemelhados”, que recebeu o Prรชmio Aรงorianos de Literatura em 1999. Em 2000, tambรฉm pela lanรงou o livro de contos “Anotaรงรตes durante o incรชndio, que reรบne onze textos de temรกticas diversas, com destaque ao judaรญsmo e ร condiรงรฃo feminina, merecendo outra vez o Prรชmio Aรงorianos de Literatura. Em 2004, publicou a coletรขnea de contos “Arquitetura do arco-รญris”, livro que lhe valeu o terceiro lugar em contos no prรชmio Jabuti. Em 2006, lanรงou o romance “Por que sou gorda, mamรฃe?”,. Em 2007, lanรงou seu sexto livro individual, o romance infanto-juvenil “Mais ou menos normal”. Em 1998, lanรงou a novela “Duas iguais – Manual de amores e equรญvocos assemelhados”, que recebeu o Prรชmio Aรงorianos de Literatura. Em 2000, tambรฉm lanรงou o livro de contos “Anotaรงรตes durante o incรชndio”, que reรบne textos de temรกticas diversas, com destaque ao judaรญsmo e ร condiรงรฃo feminina. Em 2013, “Essa coisa brilhante que รฉ a chuva” foi a vencedora do Prรชmo Clarice Lispector, concedido pela Fundaรงรฃo Bilbioteca Nacional. ___________________________
Born in 1958 in Porto Alegre, Brazil, Cรญntia Moscovich is a writer, journalist, and holds a master’s degree in Literary Theory. She has worked as a teacher, translator, literary consultant, proofreader, and press officer. Among her numerous literary awards, she won first place in the Guimarรฃes Rosa Short Story Competition, held in Paris. In 1996, she published her first solo work, “The Kingdom of Onions.” One of the short stories in the collection was translated into English and is part of an anthology featuring Portuguese-speaking Jewish writers. In 1998, she published the novel “Duas iguales – Manual de amores e equรญvocos similares,” which received the Aรงorianos Literature Prize. in 1999. In 2000, she also released the short story collection “Notes During the Fire,” which brings together eleven texts on diverse themes, highlighting Judaism and the female condition, and which again earned her the Aรงorianos Literature Prize. In 2004, she published the short story collection “Architecture of the Rainbow,”. which earned her third place in the Jabuti Prize for short stories. In 2006, she released the novel “Why Am I Fat, Mom?”. In 2007, she released her sixth solo book, the children’s novel “More or Less Normal.” In 1998, she published the novel “Duas iguales – Manual de amores e equรญvocos similares,” which received the Aรงorianos Literature Prize. In 2000, she also released the short story collection “Notes During the Fire,” which brings together texts on diverse themes, highlighting Judaism and the female condition. In 2004, she published the short story collection “Architecture of the Rainbow.” In 2006, she released the novel “Why Am I Fat, Mommy?” In 2013, “This Bright Thing That Is the Rain” won the Clarice Lispector Prize, awarded by the National Library Foundation.
_________________________________
Um gรชnio.
Aos dez anos de idade, รบnica filha de um casal descendente de imigrantes judeus, nascida depois de muitas e vรกrias tentativas โ portanto cheia de mimos, denguices, babados e brinquedos e tudo quanto me desse na telha โ, logo de mim, a unigรชnita, o pai queria que eu fosse nada mais nada menos do que isso โ uma crianรงa genial.
Assim: tinha de saber de cor as estrofes iniciais dโOs Lusรญadas (โCesse tudo o que a Musa antiga canta,/ Que outro valor mais alto se alevantaโ), ouvir calada e atenta โ e ainda por cima gostar โ a todas as รกrias de todas as รณperas que tรญnhamos em casa โ principalmente Una furtiva lacrima, no vozeirรฃo de Enrico Caruso, e a Casta Diva, gravada por Maria Callas โ, espremer os pรฉs em sapatilhas nas classes de balรฉ, assistir ร s terrรญveis aulas de piano e de inglรชs de dona Vivi, alรฉm das liรงรตes de francรชs com madame Vichy.
***
—Shein vi di levone.
Bomita como lua, tรญtulo de uma antiga canรงรฃo que imigrara junto com a famรญlia de Bessarรกbia. Mรบsica que, segundo ele, fora composto para mim, filha linda. E mesmo os anos passando, nunca esqueci daqueles abraรงos que tinham o perfume almiscarado รบmido da espuma de barba.
Coisa boa da vida.
**********
De tudo que eu cumpria como rutina diรกria, o que me propiciava mais divertimento, alรฉm de brincar, eram coisas de fazer de conta: na escola, tinha adoraรงรฃo pelas aulas de portuguรชs e pelas peรงas de teatro, e, em casa passava horas deitada de barriga para baixo, as pernas dobradas, os pรฉs se balanรงando, queixo apoiado nas mรฃos. Eu adorava ler. Piano, balรฉ, inglรชs, francรชsโcoisas porque pai dizia, a gente tinha de ser cultivadaโtudo isso eram pedรกgios carรญssimos para aquelas horas em a vida, pero, preto no branco, era puro desfrute. Meus paรญs nunca fixarem nenhum esforรงรฃo, nenhuma ameaรงa, nada: eu era naturalmente l, fato que, imagino, tambรฉm me dava muniรงรฃo suficiente para engendrar situaรงรตes para as aulas de teatro.
Passei a nutrir dois secretos desejos: eu queria escrever e trabalhar como atrizโQuimeras que a ninguรฉm revelei talvez porque, no fundo, achava que que aquilo ainda ia acabar mal.
O erro mรกximo se deu quando um dia, na mesa do almoรงo, se conversava sobre escolher ima profissรฃoโnum futuro remoto, portanto. Se eu me tivesse calado, teriam me incluรญdo no rol dos sรกbios. Mas eu falei:
– -Quando eu crescer, quero ser escritora e atriz.
O rosto do pai ficou vermelhoโdepois quase verde. A mรฃe acho melhor tirar os pratos da mesa, quase se esquecia do cafezinho, tinha deixado para coar: saiu de fininho tilintando louรงas e talheres.
O patriarca rimbombou:
–Atriz? Escritora? Tanto dinheiro em estudos e livros para ser atriz e escritora?
Tentei dizer a ele que eu gostava de teatro e gostava de contar histรณrias: queria a carreira de uma grande atriz dramรกtica e escrever como Monteiro Lobato.
—Atriz dramรกtica? Escritora? โo pai ia ter um troรงo. Encheu um copo com รกgua e tomou dois pequemos goles: acalmava-se o algo parecido.
A mรฃe, agora trazendo o bule de cafรฉ e as xรญcaras para a mesa, ousou intrometer-se:
–Mas nรฃo รฉ vocรช quer que ela recite poemas de cor e que goste de รณpera? Porque ela nรฃo pode ser artista.
Bingo, mรฃe. O pai fez um movimento afirmativa, que tanto podia significar que ele aceitava o cafezinho recรฉm passado quanto a culpa no cartรณrio que realmente tinha. Deu sequรชncia a conversa, num tom atรฉ ameno:
–Entendo que vocรช goste de teatro รฉ de literatura, todos nรณs gostamos. Mas como รฉ que vocรช pretende sobrevivir com teatro ou literatura?
ร, eu sabia que queria um futuro para mim bomโque incluรญa nรฃo ter de passar forme como elas tinham passado quando eles tinham passado quando as famรญlias chegaram ao Brasil. Tentei amenizar era tรฃo bonito ser uma personagem, que nem aquelas que nem aquelas que ele e a mรฃe viam no Teatro Sรฃo Pedro; alรฉm do mais eu achava que tinha nascida para ser escritora e nรฃo me importava em nรฃo ser rica. Ele fez โachโ de desprezo com a mรฃe. Eu desafiei: e quem sabe eu fosse que nem Scholem Aleichem, de quem ele gostava tanto? Como Erico Verisssimo? E eu se fosse uma Bibi Ferreira ou uma Julie Andrews?
–Tudo muito bonito, mas nรฃo crio filha para ser atriz, dessas que bebem e fumam outras coisas que nem รฉ bom falar. โO caldo m tinha engrossado. โAlรฉm do mais, vocรช nรฃo nasceu para ser escritora, ao menos atรฉ que prove o contrรกrio. โE lembrou que ele nรฃo era nenhum Procรณpio Ferreira para ter filha atriz.
—Vocรช vai ter um dรช e um erre antes do nome โdoutoraโ. Depois do diploma na minha mรฃo, decide-se o restoโdecretou, cravando-me uma um olhar impositivo. E sem medir a raiva, jรก siando da mesa: —Se vocรช estรก pensando em ser isso ai โe havia uma intenรงรฃo satรขnica no isso aiโentรฃo tenho que vai a vai viver de nariz quebrado (um perdedor) …
Passai a considerar a possibilidade de ser mรฉdica. Alรฉm de, claro, seguir as carreiras de atriz รฉ escritora.
********
Nossa famรญlia tinha uns pequenos de roupas para senhoras e gestantes. Nada demais, nenhum empregado, apenas um negรณcio que nos mantinha num bom patamar de vida, fato que possibilitava o monte de aulas para sem ser uma pessoa cultivada.
********
MUITO DESPOIS, EM A ESCOLA
Perto das dez da manhรฃ, o exiliar de disciplina bateu na nossa sala de aula, chamavam-me na direรงรฃo. Engoli em seco e, bravamente, trilhe se o caminho pelo corredor silencioso.
Os dois jรก se reuniam lรก com dona Malvina. O pai de terno gravata, e a mรฃe tinha feito um coque no cabelo, vestido um tailleur รฉ o color de pรฉrolas com fecho de brilhantes; senti que ela havia colocado Cabochard, preciosa reservada para os dias de festa. A cerimรณnia do momento era tรฃo grande eu a loja estava fechadaโque, entรฃo estaria atendendo? E a loja sรณ era ocasiรตes muitรญssimo especais.
Foi a diretora a iniciar a conversa:
–Chamei-os aqui porque tenho algo importante a dizer.
O pai mexeu-se cadeira, odiava obviedades. A diretora continuou:
A filha de vocรชs es mui criativa.
O pai adorava que me elogiassem. Dona Malvina prosseguiu:
–Tenho aqui comigo uma redaรงรฃo feita por ela sobre a amizade. Desculpem-me, mas tenho de saber se algum de vocรชs ajudou a escrevรช-la.
O pai e a mรฃe se entreolharam. Responderam que nรฃo: quando ela precisava de ajuda, era em matemรกtica, nunca para escrever. A diretora ficou feliz com a reposta:
–Foi o que imagineโabriu uma pasta e, de dentro de ela retirou minha relaรงรฃoโร impressionante.
O pai deu um salto, arrancando o papel da diretora; a mรฃe se pendurou para lero que estava escrito. Dona Malvina foi didรกtica:
Faz menรงรตes a O Pequeno Principe de Saint Exupรฉry, mas tambรฉm demonstra que aluna tem ideias prรณprias. Muito singulares e profundas.
A mรฃe es distraiu por um momento:
–Jรก sei por sumiu um pacote de aรงรบcar da dispensaโlogo depois se corrigiu:–Ah, mas nรฃo tem importรขncia.
O peito do pai se encheu, estufado. A diretora lanรงou a minha sorte:
–Talvez seja precipitadoโrefletiu. E daรญ salvou a pรกtria:–Pelo que ela tem ela tem demonstrado nos trabalhos anteriores e principalmente nesse, acho que tem vocaรงรฃo para ser escritora.
Ima chuva de estrelas dentro de mim. Dona Malvina arrematou:
–At onde eu soube, ela quer se formar em medicina. E tambรฉm atriz e escritora Parabรฉns. O futuro depende de incentivo. Parabรฉns.
O pai nรฃo sabia mais o que fazer. E ali, na sala da diretora, em meio รก cerimonia do momento, ele me abraรงou muito forte, tรฃo forte que me levantou do chรฃo. E ouvi ele sendo a pai mais feliz do mundo:
Shein a di levone
A bonito-do pai tinha uma futura pela frente.
Saรญmos os trรชs abraรงados.
Naquela noite, o pai abriu um vinho portuguรชs que estava guardado fazia tempo. Serviu-me num cรกlice um tantinho com รกgua e aรงรบcar.
—Lechaimโlevantou em saudaรงรฃo a taรงa no ar.
Foi a primeira que pude fazer um brinde com os adultos. Eu era feliz ali mesmo, nem precisava de um futuro….
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A genius
At ten years old, the only child of a couple descended from Jewish immigrants, born after many, many attemptsโand therefore showered with pampering, indulgences, frills, toys, and everything else I could imagineโmy father, an only child, wanted me to be nothing more, nothing less than thatโa genius.
Therefore: I had to know by heart the first stanzas of The Lusiadas (“Cease all that the ancient Muse sings, / For another, higher value, arises”), listen silently and attentivelyโand even appreciateโevery aria from every opera we had at homeโespecially โUna furtiva Lacrimaโ sung by Enrico Caruso, and La Casta Diva, recorded by Maria Callasโput my feet in ballet slippers, attend Dona Vivi’s terrible piano and English lessons, and take French lessons from Madame Vichy.
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—Shein saw di levone.
โBeautiful as the moon,โ the title of an old song he had immigrated with his family from Bessarabia. A song he said he had composed for me, his beautiful daughter. And even as the years passed, I never forgot those hugs that carried the moist, musky scent of shaving foam. A good thing in life. . .
Of all the daily routines I performed, what gave me the most fun, besides playing, were intended activities: at school, I adored Portuguese lessons and plays, and at home, I spent hours lying on my stomach, legs bent, feet dangling, chin resting on my hands. I loved reading. Piano, ballet, English, Frenchโthings because my father said we had to be cultivatedโall of these were very expensive tolls for those hours in life, but, in black and white, it was pure enjoyment. My parents never made any effort, any threat, nothing: I was naturally like that, a fact that, I imagine, also gave me enough ammunition to concoct situations for drama classes.
I began to harbor two secret desires: I wanted to write and work as an actressโfantasies that I revealed to no one perhaps because, deep down, I thought it would still end badly. The biggest mistake came when one day, at the lunch table, we were talking about choosing a professionโin the distant future, that is. If I had kept quiet, they would have included me among the wise. But I said: “When I grow up, I want to be a writer and an actress.” The father’s face turned redโthen almost green. The mother, I think I’d better clear the dishes from the table; she’d almost forgotten the coffee, she’d left it brewing. She quietly left, clinking dishes and cutlery. The patriarch boomed out: “Actress? Writer? So much money for studies and books to be an actress and a writer?” I tried to tell him that I liked theater and storytelling: I wanted a career as a great dramatic actress and to write like Monteiro Lobato. The dramatic actress? A writer?” Her father was going to have a fit. He filled a glass with water and took two small sips: something like that calmed him down. Her mother, now bringing the coffee pot and cups to the table, dared to interject: “But don’t you want her to recite poems by heart and like opera? Because she can’t be an artist.” Bingo, Mom. The father nodded, which could have meant either accepting the freshly brewed coffee or the guilt he truly felt. He continued the conversation, in a mild tone: –“I understand that you like theater and literature, we all do. But how do you intend to survive with theater or literature?” Yes, I knew I wanted a good future for myselfโone that included not having to go hungry like they had, when their families arrived in Brazil. I tried to soften the blow: it was so beautiful to be a character, like the ones he and his mother saw at the Sรฃo Pedro Theater; Besides, I thought I was born to be a writer and didn’t care about not being rich. He made a dismissive “ah” at his mother. I challenged: what if I were like Scholem Aleichem, whom he liked so much? Like Erico Verisssimo? What if I were a Bibi Ferreira or a Julie Andrews? “It’s all very nice, but I’m not raising a daughter to be an actress, the kind who drinks and smokes other things that aren’t even worth talking about.” The situation had become more difficult. “Besides, you weren’t born to be a writer, at least not until you prove otherwise.” And he remembered her that he wasn’t Procรณpio Ferreira to have an actress daughter.
“You’ll have a d and an r before the name ‘doctor.’ After the diploma is in my hand, the rest will be decided,” he decreed, fixing me with an authoritative look. And without measuring his anger, he already left the table: “If you’re thinking of being thatโand there was a satanic intention in thatโthen I’ll have to go and live with a broken nose (a loser)โฆ Start considering the possibility of being a doctor. Besides, of course, pursuing careers as an actress and a writer.”
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Our family had a few small women’s and maternity clothing stores. Nothing special, no employees, just a business that kept us at a good level A fact that made it possible to take a lot of classes without being a cultured person.
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MUCH LATER ON AT SCHOOL
Around ten in the morning, the disciplinary officer knocked on our classroom; they called me to the principal. I swallowed hard and bravely made my way down the silent hallway. The two of them were already there with Dona Malvina. The father wore a suit and tie, and the mother had tied her hair in a bun, wearing a pearl-colored suit with a diamond clasp; I sensed she had put on Cabochard, a precious jewel reserved for special occasions. The ceremony of the moment was so grand that the store was closedโso who would be open? And the store only closed for very special occasions. It was the principal who initiated the conversation: “I called you here because I have something important to say: The father shifted in his chair; he hated to be obvious. The principal continued: “Your daughter is very creative.” My father loved to be praised. Dona Malvina continued: “I have here with me an essay she wrote about friendship. Excuse me, but I need to know if any of you helped her write it.” Her father and mother looked at each other. They answered no: when she needed help, it was with math, never with writing. The principal was pleased with the answer.That’s what I imagined,” she opened a folder and took out my report. “It’s impressive.” The father jumped, snatching the paper from the principal; the mother clung to it to read what was written. Dona Malvina was didactic: “It mentions Saint-Exupรฉry’s The Little Prince, but it also shows that the student has her own ideas. Very unique and profound.” The mother was distracted for a moment: “I already know why a packet of sugar is missing from the pantry,” she corrected herself immediately. “Ah, but it doesn’t matter.” The father’s chest swelled, puffed out. The principal cast my lot: “Maybe I’m being hasty,” she reflected. And then she saved the day: “From what she’s demonstrated in her previous works, and especially in this one, I think she has a vocation to be a writer.” “A shower of stars inside me.” Dona Malvina concluded: –As far as I know, she wants to graduate in medicine. And also as an actress and writer. Congratulations. The future depends on encouragement. Congratulations. My father didn’t know what else to do. And there, in the principal’s office, in the midst of the ceremony, he hugged me tightly, so tightly that he lifted me off the floor. And I heard him being the happiest father in the world: Shein a di levone My father’s beautiful daughter had a future ahead of her. The three of us left, arms around each other. That night, my father opened a bottle of Portuguese wine that had been stored for a long time. He poured me a small amount of water and sugar in a glass. —Lechaimโhe raised the glass in the air in greeting. It was the first time I was able to make a toast with the adults. I was happy right there, I didn’t even need a futureโฆ
Liliana Heker naciรณ en Buenos Aires, en 1943. Es Cuentista, novelista y ensayista. Fundรณ y fue responsable, con Abelardo Castillo, de dos de las revistas de literatura de mayor repercusiรณn en la letras argentinas y latinoamericanas: El Escarabajo de Oro (1961-1974), yEl Ornitorrinco (1977-1986), donde publicรณ ensayos y sostuvo polรฉmicas que trascendieron la circunstancia que las motivรณ. Sus cuatro primeros libros de cuentos se reรบnen en el volumen Cuentos (editorial Punto de lectura). Publicรณ las novelas Zona de clivaje y El fin de la historia, y los libros de no ficciรณn Las hermanas de Shakespeare y Diรกlogos sobre la vida y la muerte. Su รบltimo libro de cuentos es La muerte de Dios. Obtuvo, entre otras distinciones, la Menciรณn รnica del Concurso de Casa de las Amรฉricas, el Primer Premio Municipal de Novela, el Premio Konex de Platino, el Premio a la Trayectoria Letras de Oro de la Fundaciรณn Honorarte, el Premio Esteban Echeverrรญa a la trayectoria, otorgado por Gente de Letras. Entre 2005 y 2011 se desempeรฑรณ como directora del Fondo Nacional de las Artes. Desde 1978 coordina talleres de narrativa en los que se han formado varios de los mejores nuevos narradores de la literatura argentina.
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Liliana Heker was born in Buenos Aires in 1943, he is a short story writer, novelist, and essayist. He founded and edited, with Abelardo Castillo, two of the most influential literary magazines in Argentine and Latin American literature: El Escarabajo de Oro (1961โ1974) and El Ornitorrinco (1977โ1986), where he published essays and engaged in controversies that transcended the circumstances that motivated them. His first four collections of short stories are collected in the volume Cuentos (Punto de lectura). She published the novels Zona de Clivaje and El fin de la historia (The End of History), and the nonfiction books Las hermana de Shakespeare (Shakespeare’s Sisters) and Diรกlogos sobre la vida y la muerte (Dialogues on Life and Death). Her latest collection of short stories is La muerte de Dios (The Death of God).Among other awards, she has received the Sole Mention in the Casa de las Amรฉricas Competition, the First Municipal Novel Prize, the Platinum Konex Award, the Letras de Oro Lifetime Achievement Award from the Honorarte Foundation, and the Esteban Echeverrรญa Lifetime Achievement Award from Gente de Letras. From 2005 to 2011, she served as director of the National Arts Fund. Since 1978, she has coordinated narrative workshops that have trained several of the best new storytellers in Argentine literature.
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“UNA MUCHACHA Y SU DIOS”
Ser judรญa โirรก aprendiendoโ es muchas cosas a la vez, todas ilรณgicas. La prohibiciรณn de usar la medalla del hombrecito es sรณlo una. Poco despuรฉs de ese episodio se entera de que tampoco podrรก ir al colegio al que una vez se escapรณ sรณlo por averiguar a dรณnde iban las niรฑas del sombrerito azul que tanto anhelaba, y en el que vio unas maestras como novias negras que la estremecieron de pavor y de deseo. Otra catรกstrofe ocurre en su quinto dรญa de clase. Marianita entrรณ directo a primero superior porque sabe todo, le cuenta su mamรก a cualquiera que se le cruza. Pero es mentira, no sabe todo: ignora las claves de un mundo en que los demรกs parecen manejarse como peces en el agua. Sรณlo ella boquea. Literalmente boquea: ha vomitado todas las maรฑanas en el momento de salir para el colegio. En su quinto dรญa de clase, la maestra formula una orden que la deja helada: Pรณnganse de pie los niรฑos que no son catรณlicos. ยฟHay un aura de desconcierto a su alrededor? ยฟO es sรณlo ella la que siente que, por primera vez, va a tener que hacer pรบblica una situaciรณn que no termina de entender? A su derecha, se ha puesto de pie una chica muy gorda y de apellido impronunciable a quien ella considera una perfecta tarada. Eso empeora las cosas: no quiere ser parte de un clan despreciable. Con disimulo echa una mirada hacia atrรกs. Ve de pie junto a su banco a la chica que mรกs le gusta: es flaca, tiene pecas en la nariz y conoce los doce trabajos de Hรฉrcules. Tambiรฉn ve de pie a un chico que se llama Fernรกndez. ยฟPuede un judรญo llamarse Fernรกndez? Empieza a sospechar que ser judรญo debe ser aun mรกs complicado de lo que ella creรญa. Va a tener que pensar en eso. Ahora no tiene tiempo: la maestra estรก terminando de hacer un anuncio importante: los martes y viernes en la tercera hora los niรฑos catรณlicos se quedarรกn en el aula para la clase de Religiรณn. Los niรฑos no catรณlicos se trasladarรกn al aula de primero inferior B para la clase de Moral. El martes siguiente, a la tercera hora, empieza para ella un nuevo calvario.
Lo que mรกs la inquieta es la indefiniciรณn, esa zona amorfa y gelatinosa a la que son arrojados los niรฑos que no estudian Religiรณn. La religiรณn es algo. Mariana no conoce del todo sus reglas pero confรญa en su perfecta definiciรณn. En ella entran Dios, los santos, la Virgen Marรญa y el Niรฑo Jesรบs. No estรก segura de si Dios y el Niรฑo Jesรบs son la misma persona y tampoco puede establecer una relaciรณn muy clara entre el Niรฑo Jesรบs (tambiรฉn llamado Niรฑo Dios para complicar las cosas), que suele estar en un pesebre, sobre un jergรณn โcรณmo le gusta la palabra โjergรณnโ; Heidi tambiรฉn, en la cabaรฑa de su abuelo, duerme en un jergรณnโ, rodeado de cabritas y de burros, y el hombre de pelo largo, siempre muy serio y a veces en la cruz de recuerdo tan doloroso para ella. Los niรฑos que van a Religiรณn deben aprender todas esas cosas y tambiรฉn la vida de los santos โnada le resulta tan tentador como las historias y la expresiรณn โvida de santosโ promete historias innumerablesโ y el misterioso catecismo, que estudian (fuera del colegio) los niรฑos de siete aรฑos que van a tomar la comuniรณn. ยกLa comuniรณn! ยกHe aquรญ un escamoteo realmente cruel! ยฟPuede existir algo mรกs encantador que ese traje de novia con el que las niรฑas catรณlicas se pasean por las calles el 8 de diciembre? Y acรก se presenta otro de los enigmas que Mariana no estรก en condiciones de resolver: ยฟes lo mismo ser catรณlico que ser cristiano? ยฟY es lo mismo โPadreโ que โDiosโ? Es un hecho que el Padre Nuestro que estรกs en los cielos es Dios pero ยฟquรฉ tiene en comรบn con el cura de la parroquia que, cada tanto, viene al aula a hablarles? Los niรฑos catรณlicos lo llaman โPadreโ, ella no. ยฟY cรณmo deberรญa llamarlo?: ยฟSeรฑor? De cualquier manera, el cura de la parroquia parece ignorarla. Da por hecho que en el mundo no hay otra cosa que niรฑos catรณlicos y los invita a la fiesta de la parroquia y les dice cรณmo deben comportarse para ser buenos cristianos y ganarse el cielo. Eso no la tienta de ninguna manera, le parece que el cura estรก diciendo una perfecta mentira: nadie es bueno del modo en que รฉl dice que hay que serlo, ni siquiera รฉl mismo. No le gustan los curas, parecen fallutos. A su mamรก sรญ le gustan: dice que hablan lindo y que saben muchas cosas. Su mamรก es bastante difรญcil de entender. Por una parte dice que es judรญa y por otra parte dice que le gusta cรณmo hablan los curas y que, cuando era soltera, para Semana Santa, se iba a escondidas al cine a ver la Pasiรณn y muerte de Nuestro Seรฑor Jesucristo. Es una historia tan terrible, le dice. A su mamรก le gustan todas las historias terribles, por eso canta las cosas que canta. Pero a mis hermanas no les contaba que iba a ver la Pasiรณn y muerte (le dice): iban a pensar que soy una renegada. Aunque tambiรฉn le dice que ser un renegado es lo peor que una persona puede ser. No es fรกcil, con una persona como su mamรก, saber quรฉ es ser judรญo. Y con su papรก menos. Nunca le explican nada. Dicen que son judรญos, y que ella tiene que ir a Moral, y listo. Y รฉse es su calvario: la moral no es nada. Al menos, nadie sabe quรฉ es; ni siquiera la maestra de Moral que les tocรณ, que en realidad no esmaestra de Moral sino de primero inferior B. Desde el primer dรญa Mariana pensรณ que a esa maestra la habรญan puesto ahรญ porque a alguien tenรญan que poner, si no, ยฟquรฉ iban a hacer con los niรฑos judรญos y con el niรฑo que no tiene apellido judรญo pero igual va a Moral? โun chico le dijo en secreto que los padres son comunistas, ella no sabe si ser comunista es bueno o malo, lo que le gusta es que el chico sea tan dulce y que conozca el cuento del Prรญncipe Felizโ. A las clases de Moral van niรฑos de todos los grados y se ve bien claro que la maestra no sabe quรฉ hacer con esa mezcolanza. A veces les lee cuentos, que son lo mejor de la moral. El sastrecillo valiente, les lee un dรญa, y a ella le da en el centro mismo del corazรณn el modo en que el sastrecillo, que es pequeรฑo y debilucho, pudo vencer al gigante nada mรกs que con inteligencia y picardรญa. Pero no siempre pasan cosas tan agradables en las clases de Moral. Una vez les hacen hacer una composiciรณn sobre el ahorro. Y ella, que ama hacer composiciones casi mรกs que cualquier otra cosa en el mundo, acerca del ahorro sรณlo puede mentir, de la primera a la รบltima palabra. Y mentir de manera fea, diciendo cosas en las que otros creen pero ella no, que es la peor manera de mentir. Sobre todo cuando se hacen composiciones. No sabe por quรฉ, pero le parece que en una composiciรณn una tiene que descubrir la verdad. Si le piden que escriba sobre la primavera, ella se pone a pensar y pensar quรฉ es eso de la primavera, no pura florcita y puro trino, como dicen los libros de lectura: tiene que descubrir la primavera, para eso estรกn las cosas escritas. Pero ยฟquรฉ descubrimiento se puede hacer sobre el ahorro? Por cuestiones como รฉsa siente que mandarla a Moral es lo mismo que tirarla a la basura. La religiรณn es algo, pero la moral no es nada. Y a ella, las cosas que no son nada le dan asco.
Con el tiempo aprenderรก a reรญrse. Sentada en el banco junto a la pecosa que le gusta tanto โlas dos son buenas en matemรกticas, las dos hacen composiciones hermosas, las dos leen a Salgariโ aprenderรก que la moral es buena para reรญrse de los otros y no hacer nada. Nadie la calificarรก, nadie le exigirรก ninguna cosa. Llegarรก a entender sin dramatismo que las clases de Moral son un mero pretexto para mantener alejados a los niรฑos judรญos de las clases de Religiรณn. ยฟEs que los judรญos carecen de religiรณn? Sus conocimientos al respecto son un poco confusos. Algunos de sus compaรฑeros de Moral parecen saber mucho sobre el tema y es como si formaran parte de una secta, pero a ella no le gustan las sectas asรญ que no habla con ellos del tema, y la pecosa sabe tan poco como ella acerca de la cuestiรณn judรญa. ยฟQuรฉ sabe ella? Que una vez al aรฑo toda la familia se reรบne a cenar en la casa de sus abuelos y festejan el Pesaj. Eso es divertido y la comida es riquรญsima; el รบnico inconveniente es que, para empezar a comer, tienen que esperar a que su abuelo y el mรกs chico de sus primos varones digan un montรณn de cosas que nadie entiende. Pero despuรฉs comen y se rรญen mucho y eso le encanta. Otra fiesta que le gusta es el Iom Kipur. Ese dรญa, todas las hermanas de su mamรก ayunan para que les perdonen sus pecados y se pasan el dรญa entero sentadas en el shil, pero su mamรก no ayuna: dice que, a ella, estar todo el dรญa con el estรณmago vacรญo le da languidez y que si no toma unos mates a la maรฑana se siente mal. Lo que sรญ, almuerzo liviano, dice su mamรก. Y en lugar de pasarse todo el dรญa en el shil, a la tarde se pone lindรญsima y a ella tambiรฉn la pone lindรญsima, y entonces sรญ se van al shil para que todos las vean. Lucรญa no quiere ir asรญ que siempre, antes de salir, se descompone y vomita. Su papรก, en el Iom Kipur, come y vive como si tal cosa. Del Dios de los judรญos nadie le hablรณ nunca asรญ que ella da por hecho que es un tema de la religiรณn, y la religiรณn es para los catรณlicos. En un tiempo, cuando se enterรณ de que la tierra era redonda e imaginรณ al cielo como la parte superior de la esfera (que ella sรณlo podรญa ver desde abajo) veรญa a Dios vestido de amarillo y con un poncho de gaucho, sentado con las piernas cruzadas sobre la superficie de la esfera, pero no pensรณ demasiado en รฉl ni le atribuyรณ mรกs poder que el de mantenerse sentado sin caerse en un lugar tan incรณmodo. Su mamรก siempre dice que hay un Dios, y ahรญ se le termina el comentario. Su papรก, de Dios no habla nunca. Lucรญa le leyรณ unos poemas muy hermosos de un poeta que se llama Leรณn Felipe. A ella le gustaron mucho, sobre todo uno que dice ยกQuรฉ lรกstima que yo no pueda cantar a la usanza de este tiempo lo mismo que los poetas de hoy cantan! Lucรญa le dijo que Leรณn Felipe es panteรญsta. Quรฉ es ser panteรญsta, le preguntรณ ella. Es creer que Dios es todas las cosas, le dijo Lucรญa. Ella desde entonces trata de imaginar que Dios es las plantas, y los gatos, y las nubes en el cielo. Es lindo eso, le da como alegrรญa, pero no lo entiende del todo. ยกDios estรก azul!, dice otro poema lindรญsimo. Le encanta decir โDios estรก azulโ, pero nada mรกs que eso. Ahora ya no vomita cuando va al colegio, y aprendiรณ cรณmo ser buena alumna sin tomarse demasiado trabajo. No piensa en Dios. Si lo encuentra en los libros acepta con naturalidad que sus personajes amados crean en รฉl, del mismo modo que acepta que viajen en diligencia o se lancen al abordaje con el kriss entre los dientes. Nada mรกs que eso. Un ser impreciso y ajeno.
Being Jewishโshe will gradually learnโis many things at once, all illogical. The prohibition against wearing the little man medal is just one. Shortly after that episode, she learns that she will no longer be able to go to the school. She once ran away from just to find out where the little girls with the little blue hats she so longed for went, and where she saw teachers who were like black brides who thrilled her with fear and desire. Another catastrophe occurs on her fifth day of school. Marianita went straight to the first grade because she knows everything, her mother tells anyone she meets. But it’s a lie; she doesn’t know everything: she ignores the keys to a world in which others seem to navigate like fish in water. Only she gasps. Literally gasps. She has vomited every morning before leaving for school. On her fifth day of school, the teacher gives her an order that leaves her frozen: Children who aren’t Catholic, stand up.
Is there an aura of bewilderment around her? Or is it just her who feels that, for the first time, she’s going to have to go public with a situation she doesn’t fully understand? To her right, a very fat girl with an unpronounceable last name, whom she considers a complete idiot, has stood up. That makes things worse: she doesn’t want to be part of a despicable clan. She surreptitiously glances behind her. She sees the girl she likes most standing next to her desk: she’s skinny, has freckles on her nose, and knows the twelve labors of Hercules. She also sees a boy named Fernรกndez standing there. Can a Jew be named Fernรกndez? She’s beginning to suspect that being Jewish must be even more complicated than she thought. She’s going to have to think about that. She doesn’t have time now: the teacher is finishing up an important announcement: on Tuesdays and Fridays, during third period, the Catholic children will stay in their classroom for Religion class. The non-Catholic children will be moved to the lower B classroom for Morals class. The following Tuesday, at the third hour, a new ordeal begins for her.
What worries her most is the lack of definition, that amorphous, gelatinous zone into which students who don’t study religion are thrown. Religion is something. Mariana doesn’t fully understand its rules, but she trusts its perfect definition. It includes God, the saints, the Virgin Mary, and the Baby Jesus. She’s not sure if God and the Baby Jesus are the same person, and she can’t establish a very clear relationship between the Baby Jesus (also called the Baby Jesus to complicate things), who is usually in a manger, on a mattressโhow she loves the word “mattress”; Heidi, too, in her grandfather’s cabin, sleeps on a mattressโsurrounded by goats and donkeys, and the long-haired man, always very serious and sometimes on the cross, a memory so painful for her. Children who go to Religion must learn all these things, as well as the lives of the saintsโnothing is as tempting to her as stories, and the expression โlives of saintsโ promises countless storiesโand the mysterious catechism, which seven-year-olds who are about to take Communion study (outside of school). Communion! Here’s a truly cruel trick! Could anything be more charming than that wedding dress Catholic girls wear when parading through the streets on December 8th? And here arises another of the enigmas Mariana is in no position to solve: is being Catholic the same as being Christian? And is โFatherโ the same as โGodโ? It’s a fact that Our Father who art in heaven is God, but what does he have in common with the parish priest who, from time to time, comes to the classroom to speak to them? The Catholic children call him โFather,โ she doesn’t. And what should she call him? Lord? In any case, the parish priest seems to ignore her. He assumes there is nothing in the world but Catholic children and invites them to the parish festival and tells them how they should behave to be good Christians and earn heaven. This doesn’t tempt her in the least; it seems to her that the priest is telling a perfect lie: no one is good the way he says they should be, not even himself. She doesn’t like priests; they seem like fools. Her mother does like them: she says they speak beautifully and know a lot of things. Her mother is quite difficult to understand. On the one hand, she says she is Jewish, and on the other hand, she says she likes the way priests talk and that, when she was single, during Holy Week, she would secretly go to the movies to see The Passion and Death of Our Lord Jesus Christ. It’s such a terrible story, she tells him. Her mom likes all terrible stories, that’s why she sings the things she sings. But I didn’t tell my sisters I was going to see The Passion and Death (she tells her): they would think I was a renegade. Her mother he also tells him that being a renegade is the worst thing a person can be. It’s not easy, with a person like her mom, to know what it means to be Jewish. And even less so with her dad. They never explain anything to her. They say they’re Jewish, and that she has to go to Moral, and that’s it. And that’s her ordeal: Moral is nothing. At least, nobody knows what it is; Not even the Moral Studies teacher they were assigned, who in fact isn’t a Moral Studies teacher but rather a Lower B teacher. From the first day, Mariana thought that that teacher had been put there because they had to put someone there; otherwise, what would they do with the Jewish children and with the boy who doesn’t have a Jewish last name but still goes to Moral Studies? A boy secretly told her that his parents are communists; she doesn’t know if being a communist is good or bad; what she likes is that the boy is so sweet and that he knows the story of the Happy Prince. Children from all grades attend Moral Studies classes, and it’s clear to see that the teacher doesn’t know what to do with that mishmash. Sometimes she reads them stories, which are the best of Moral Studies. She reads “The Brave Little Tailor” to them one day, and it hits her right in the center of her heart how the little tailor, who is small and weak, was able to defeat the giant with nothing more than intelligence and cunning. But such pleasant things don’t always happen in Moral Studies classes. Once they were asked to write a composition about thrift. And she, who loves writing compositions almost more than anything else in the world, can only lie about thrift, from the first word to the last. And she can lie badly, saying things that others believe but she doesn’t, which is the worst kind of lying. Especially when writing compositions. She doesn’t know why, but it seems to her that in a composition one has to discover the truth. If they ask her to write about spring, she starts to think and think about what spring is, not just a little flower and a little song, as the reading books say: she has to discover spring, that’s what written things are for. But what discovery can be made about thrift? For reasons like that, she feels that sending it to Moral is the same as throwing it away. Religion is something, but morality is nothing. And things that are nothing disgust her.
In time, she’ll learn to laugh. Sitting on the bench next to the freckled girl she likes so muchโthey’re both good at math, they both write beautiful compositions, they both read Salgariโshe’ll learn that morality is good for laughing at others and doing nothing. No one will grade her, no one will demand anything of her. She’ll come to understand, without any drama, that Moral Studies classes are a mere pretext to keep Jewish children away from Religion classes. Do Jews lack religion? Her knowledge on the subject is a bit confusing. Some of her classmates in Moral Studies seem to know a lot about the subject, and it’s as if they were part of a cult, but she doesn’t like cults, so she doesn’t talk to them about it, and the freckled girl knows as little as she does about the Jewish question. What does she know? That once a year the whole family gets together for dinner at her grandparents’ house and celebrates Passover. It’s fun, and the food is delicious. The only drawback is that, to start eating, they have to wait for their grandfather and the youngest of their male cousins to say a bunch of things that no one understands. But afterward, they eat and laugh a lot, and she loves it. Another holiday she likes is Yom Kippur. On that day, all of her mother’s sisters fast to be forgiven for their sins and spend the entire day sitting in the shil, but her mother doesn’t fast: she says that being on an empty stomach all day makes her feel languid, and if she doesn’t have some mate in the morning, she feels sick. What she does have is a light lunch, says her mother. And instead of spending the entire day in the shil, in the afternoon she looks gorgeous, and he makes her gorgeous too, and then they go to the shil so everyone can see them. Lucรญa doesn’t want to go, so she always gets sick and vomits before leaving. Her father, on Yom Kippur, eats and lives as if nothing had happened.
No one ever spoke to her about the God of the Jews, so she assumes it’s a religious topic, and religion is for Catholics. Once upon a time, when she learned the Earth was round and imagined the sky as the top of the sphere (which she could only see from below), she saw God dressed in yellow and wearing a gaucho poncho, sitting cross-legged on the surface of the sphere, but she didn’t think much about him or attribute to him any power other than that of staying seated without falling over in such an uncomfortable spot. Her mother always says there is a God, and that’s the end of her commentary. Her father never speaks about God. Lucรญa read her some very beautiful poems by a poet named Leรณn Felipe. She liked them a lot, especially one that says, “What a pity I can’t sing in the style of our time, the same things that today’s poets sing!” Lucรญa told her that Leรณn Felipe is a pantheist. “What does it mean to be a pantheist?” she asked. It’s believing that God is all things, Lucรญa told her. Since then, she’s tried to imagine that God is the plants, the cats, and the clouds in the sky. That’s beautiful, it gives her a kind of joy, but she doesn’t fully understand it. “God is blue!” says another beautiful poem. She loves to say, “God is blue,” but nothing more than that. Now she doesn’t vomit when she goes to school, and she’s learned how to be a good student without going to too much trouble. She doesn’t think about God. If she finds him in books, she naturally accepts that her beloved characters believe in him, just as she accepts that they travel by stagecoach or jump into the sea with the Kriss between their teeth. Nothing more than that. An imprecise and alien being.
Being Jewishโshe will gradually learnโis many things at once, all illogical. The prohibition against wearing the little man medal is just one. Shortly after that episode, she learns that she will no longer be able to go to the school she once ran away from just to find out where the little girls with the little blue hats she so longed for went, and where she saw teachers who were like black brides who thrilled her with fear and desire. Another catastrophe occurs on her fifth day of school. Marianita goes straight to the first grade because she knows everything, her mother tells anyone she meets. But it’s a lie; she doesn’t know everything: she ignores the keys to a world in which others seem to navigate like fish in water. Only she gasps. Literally gasps. She has vomited every morning before leaving for school. On her fifth day of school, the teacher gives her an order that leaves her frozen: Children who aren’t Catholic, stand up.
Is there an aura of bewilderment around her? Or is it just her who feels that, for the first time, she’s going to have to go public with a situation she doesn’t fully understand? To her right, a very fat girl with an unpronounceable last name, whom she considers a complete idiot, has stood up. That makes things worse: she doesn’t want to be part of a despicable clan. She surreptitiously glances behind her. She sees the girl she likes most standing next to her desk: she’s skinny, has freckles on her nose, and knows the twelve labors of Hercules. She also sees a boy named Fernandez standing there. Can a Jew be named Fernandez? She’s beginning to suspect that being Jewish must be even more complicated than she thought. She’s going to have to think about that. She doesn’t have time now: the teacher is finishing up an important announcement: on Tuesdays and Fridays, during third period, the Catholic children will stay in their classroom for Religion class. The non-Catholic children will be moved to the lower B classroom for Morals class. The following Tuesday, at the third hour, a new ordeal begins for her.
What worries her most is the lack of definition, that amorphous, gelatinous zone into
which children who don’t study religion are thrown. Religion is something. Mariana doesn’t fully understand its rules, but she trusts its perfect definition. It includes God, the saints, the Virgin Mary, and the Baby Jesus. She’s not sure if God and the Baby Jesus are the same person, and she can’t establish a very clear relationship between the Baby Jesus (also called the Baby Jesus to complicate things), who is usually in a manger, on a mattressโhow she loves the word “mattress”; Heidi, too, in her grandfather’s cabin, sleeps on a mattressโsurrounded by goats and donkeys, and the long-haired man, always very serious and sometimes on the cross, a memory so painful for her. Children who go to Religion must learn all these things, as well as the lives of the saintsโnothing is as tempting to her as stories, and the expression โlives of saintsโ promises countless storiesโand the mysterious catechism, which seven-year-olds who are about to take Communion study (outside of school). Communion! Here’s a truly cruel trick! Could anything be more charming than that wedding dress Catholic girls wear when parading through the streets on December 8th? And here arises another of the enigmas Mariana is in no position to solve: is being Catholic the same as being Christian? And is โFatherโ the same as โGodโ? It’s a fact that Our Father who art in heaven is God, but what does he have in common with the parish priest who, from time to time, comes to the classroom to speak to them? The Catholic children call him โFather,โ she doesn’t. And what should she call him? Lord? In any case, the parish priest seems to ignore her. She assumes there is nothing in the world but Catholic children and invites them to the parish festival and tells them how they should behave to be good Christians and earn heaven. This doesn’t tempt her in the least; it seems to her that the priest is telling a perfect lie: no one is good the way he says they should be, not even himself. She doesn’t like priests; they seem like fools. Her mother does like them: she says they speak beautifully and know a lot of things. Her mother is quite difficult to understand. On the one hand, she says she is Jewish, and on the other hand, she says she likes the way priests talk and that, when she was single, during Holy Week, she would secretly go to the movies to see The Passion and Death of Our Lord Jesus Christ. It’s such a terrible story, she tells him. Her mom likes all terrible stories, that’s why she sings the things she sings. But I didn’t tell my sisters I was going to see The Passion and Death (she tells him): they would think I was a renegade. Although she also tells him that being a renegade is the worst thing a person can be. It’s not easy, with a person like her mom, to know what it means to be Jewish. And even less so with her dad. They never explain anything to her. They say they’re Jewish, and that she has to go to Moral, and that’s it. And that’s her ordeal: Moral is nothing. At least, nobody knows what it is; Not even the Moral Studies teacher they were assigned, who in fact isn’t a Moral Studies teacher but rather a Lower B teacher. From the first day, Mariana thought that that teacher had been put there because they had to put someone there; otherwise, what would they do with the Jewish children and with the boy who doesn’t have a Jewish last name but still goes to Moral Studies? A boy secretly told her that his parents are communists; she doesn’t know if being a communist is good or bad; what she likes is that the boy is so sweet and that he knows the story of the Happy Prince. Children from all grades attend Moral Studies classes, and it’s clear to see that the teacher doesn’t know what to do with that mishmash. Sometimes she reads them stories, which are the best of Moral Studies. The Brave Little Tailor reads to them one day, and it hits her right in the center of her heart how the little tailor, who is small and weak, was able to defeat the giant with nothing more than intelligence and cunning. But such pleasant things don’t always happen in Moral Studies classes. Once they were asked to write a composition about thrift. And she, who loves writing compositions almost more than anything else in the world, can only lie about thrift, from the first word to the last. And she can lie badly, saying things that others believe but she doesn’t, which is the worst kind of lying. Especially when writing compositions. She doesn’t know why, but it seems to her that in a composition one has to discover the truth. If they ask her to write about spring, she starts to think and think about what spring is, not just a little flower and a little song, as the reading books say: she has to discover spring, that’s what written things are for. But what discovery can be made about thrift? For reasons like that, she feels that sending it to Moral is the same as throwing it away. Religion is something, but morality is nothing. And things that are nothing disgust her.
In time, she’ll learn to laugh. Sitting on the bench next to the freckled girl she likes so muchโthey’re both good at math, they both write beautiful compositions, they both read Salgariโshe’ll learn that morality is good for laughing at others and doing nothing. No one will grade her, no one will demand anything of her. She’ll come to understand, without any drama, that Moral Studies classes are a mere pretext to keep Jewish children away from Religion classes. Do Jews lack religion? Her knowledge on the subject is a bit confusing. Some of her classmates in Moral Studies seem to know a lot about the subject, and it’s as if they were part of a cult, but she doesn’t like cults, so she doesn’t talk to them about it, and the freckled girl knows as little as she does about the Jewish question. What does she know? That once a year the whole family gets together for dinner at her grandparents’ house and celebrates Passover. It’s fun, and the food is delicious. The only drawback is that, to start eating, they have to wait for their grandfather and the youngest of their male cousins to say a bunch of things that no one understands. But afterward, they eat and laugh a lot, and she loves it. Another holiday she likes is Yom Kippur. On that day, all of her mother’s sisters fast to be forgiven for their sins and spend the entire day sitting in the shil, but her mother doesn’t fast: she says that being on an empty stomach all day makes her feel languid, and if she doesn’t have some mate in the morning, she feels sick. What she does have is a light lunch, says her mother. And instead of spending the entire day in the shil, in the afternoon she looks gorgeous, and he makes her gorgeous too, and then they go to the shil so everyone can see them. Lucรญa doesn’t want to go, so she always gets sick and vomits before leaving. Her father, on Yom Kippur, eats and lives as if nothing had happened.
No one ever spoke to her about the God of the Jews, so she assumes it’s a religious topic, and religion is for Catholics. Once upon a time, when she learned the Earth was round and imagined the sky as the top of the sphere (which she could only see from below), she saw God dressed in yellow and wearing a gaucho poncho, sitting cross-legged on the surface of the sphere, but she didn’t think much about him or attribute to him any power other than that of staying seated without falling over in such an uncomfortable spot. Her mother always says there is a God, and that’s the end of her commentary. Her father never speaks about God. Lucรญa read her some very beautiful poems by a poet named Leรณn Felipe. She liked them a lot, especially one that says, “What a pity I can’t sing in the style of our time, the same things that today’s poets sing!” Lucรญa told her that Leรณn Felipe is a pantheist. “What does it mean to be a pantheist?” she asked. It’s believing that God is all things, Lucรญa told her. Since then, she’s tried to imagine that God is the plants, the cats, and the clouds in the sky. That’s beautiful, it gives her a kind of joy, but she doesn’t fully understand it. “God is blue!” says another beautiful poem. She loves to say, “God is blue,” but nothing more than that. Now she doesn’t vomit when she goes to school, and she’s learned how to be a good student without going to too much trouble. She doesn’t think about God. If she finds him in books, she naturally accepts that her beloved characters believe in him, just as she accepts that they travel by stagecoach or jump into the sea with the Kriss between their teeth. Nothing more than that. An imprecise and alien being.
Desde muy joven escribรญ poesรญa, a menudo con desesperaciรณn. Poner en palabras el dolor fue, durante mucho tiempo, una forma sutil de autosanaciรณn. Algunos de esos poemas dieron forma a los seis libros que figuran mรกs abajo. En aรฑos recientes, me he volcado al relato. Diario de un cuรฉntenik se basa tanto en personajes reales โpersonas que conocรญ trabajandoโ como en mi imaginaciรณn.
He vivido, con suerte diversa, del comercio. Hoy me dedico al tratamiento de rezagos electrรณnicos y al comercio electrรณnico. Me gusta pensar que soy un cuรฉntenik tecnolรณgico, pero cuรฉntenik al fin.
Se ha publicado recientemente Vulnerables, 2024, un libro que explora, entre otras cosas, la presencia de seres visibles e invisibles que habitan mi barrio: San Telmo, donde vivo desde hace aรฑos, en la ciudad de Buenos Aires. Ese libro y El despuรฉs es ahora, 2021, fueron publicado por A Capella.
Actualmente estoy desarrollando Un judรญo amateur, un libro que combina ensayo, memoria personal y reflexiรณn sobre la identidad judรญa.
Nacรญ en Bahรญa Blanca en 1957. Estudiรฉ Matemรกtica en la Universidad de Buenos Aires y fui presidente, durante ocho aรฑos, de la Asociaciรณn Argentina del Juego de Go.
_______________________________
Jorge Santkovsky:
I wrote more poetry than anything else, often out of desperation. To express pain in words resulted in a subtle form of self-cleansing. A number of those poems were embodied in the five books of poetry that I mention below. A while ago, I made an incursion into the short-story, Diario de un cuรฉntenikย is based as much on people I met while working as in my imagination. Many other stories, on varied themes, still remain unpublished. They are waiting, patiently, to see the light.
It is from commerce that I have lived my entire life, with varied luck, I should say. Right now, Iโm comfortable dedicating myself to the handling of remaindered electronic devices and to internet sales. I like to think that I am a technological cuentenik, but a proud cuentenik in the end.
ย ย ย ย These days I find myself writing about the magic of visible and invisible beings that inhabit the neighborhood of San Telmo, old neighborhood where I live in Buenos Aires. Vulnerables, a book that explores, among other things, the presence of visible and invisible beings that inhabit my neighborhood: San Telmo, where I have lived for years, in the city of Buenos Aires, has recently been published. That book and The After is Now 2021 were published by A Capella.
I was born in Bahรญa Blanca in 1957 and moved to Buenos Aires in 1976.
I took courses in mathematics at the University of Buenos Aires.
For eight years, I was president of the Argentine Association for the Game of Go.
_________________________________________
Saludos para todos
Hasta ahora los parientes fallecidos de mi familia materna son menos que los miembros vivos que habitan en mi ciudad natal. La misma ciudad donde mis abuelos formaron la familia a la que, con orgullo, pertenezco. Hubo quien observรณ que no hay que descuidarse y si los jรณvenes siguen emigrando podrรญa afectar la sagrada ecuaciรณn. Serรญa una desagradable sorpresa ser menos los vivos que los que descansan en el cementerio. Como no estรก permitida la cremaciรณn dentro del judaรญsmo la cuenta es sencilla de hacer. Entregarse a la tierra, es el modo de purificar el alma. Dice la tradiciรณn de que no es prudente desafiar al destino.
No hay modo de retener a los jรณvenes que piensan buscar nuevos horizontes. Somos descendientes de los mรกs audaces, de aquellos que sobrevivieron a las persecuciones gracias a su temeridad de emigrar a estas nobles tierras. No entendรญan el idioma local, pero en donde se decรญa que se tiraba una semilla y se cosechaba dinero. Es cierto que no tenรญan mucho que perder en sus paรญses de origen, quedarse era soportar hambre y violencia. El espรญritu intrรฉpido se mantiene en la sangre, aunque cambie el escenario y lo que estรก ocurriendo era lo esperable. Lamento decirlo, pero en algรบn momento los temores se cumplirรกn y serรกn menos los vivos que moran en la sureรฑa ciudad que los que descansan en el camposanto.
Mareado por estas reflexiones voy a visitar las tumbas de mis familiares fallecidos. Mi primo se ofreciรณ para acompaรฑarme, รฉl se autodefine como un visitador serial de cementerios. Me cuenta que la traducciรณn al hebreo es beit jaim, la casa de la vida. Para รฉl siempre es un buen momento visitarlos. Es de aquellos parientes que hay en toda familia que se dedica a homenajear la memoria de los ancestros.
Mi prima, cuando se enterรณ, con total naturalidad, me envรญo saludos para todos. Yo no dije nada para no ofenderla.
Los cementerios judรญos son bien mantenidos mientras quedan deudos en la ciudad que se ocupan de ellos. En aquellos pueblos donde casi no habitan miembros de la comunidad, los pocos que quedan tienen las llaves por si algรบn pariente lejano siente necesidad de bucear en su pasado. O para recibir algรบn curioso amante del necro turismo.
La tierra escasea y las ciudades crecen para donde encuentran espacio. Lo peor para un cementerio es quedar en medio de un poblado porque aumentan los riesgos de los saqueadores que nunca faltan. O de los emprendedores que necesitan terrenos para sus inversiones.
Este cementerio ha quedado alejado de las rutas de acceso a la ciudad, nada pasa cerca de ese camino de tierra. Sus vecinos son hornos de ladrillos seguramente sin habilitaciรณn legal. Y un nutrido basural clandestino sin control municipal. Con bolsas de plรกstico que arrastradas por el viento que terminan atrapadas en los cercos de los campos vecinos. Este penoso paisaje me recordรณ que en varios pasajes de la biblia se habla de un basurero publico ubicado en el sur de Jerusalรฉn. En este lugar, no solo se arrojaban los cadรกveres de los criminales y animales sacrificados, sino tambiรฉn los desechos de la ciudad.
La asociaciรณn entre Gehena, que era el nombre del basurero, y la condenaciรณn eterna se debรญa principalmente a las llamas que ardรญan constantemente para consumir los desechos. Una imagen de destrucciรณn y muerte. Ademรกs, el hedor y la putrefacciรณn que emanaban de este lugar aรฑadรญan una sensaciรณn de horror y desolaciรณn que se llegรณ a asociar con un tormento eterno. De ahรญ surgiรณ la idea del infierno para los pecadores.
Un basural cerca del cementerio, es como convocar a un infierno cercano. Algo deberรญa hacer la comunidad al respecto porque es un espectรกculo decepcionante. Pero, a la vez, nada mal para un cementerio al que le conviene pasar desapercibido.
Cuando llegamos vimos que en el antiguo portรณn habรญa un cartel de cerrado. Nos sorprendiรณ porque en el calendario hebreo no habรญa ninguna conmemoraciรณn religiosa.
Debรญa ser necesariamente algo temporal.
No tenรญa yo otra fecha para visitarlo y estaba de paso en la ciudad, asรญ que esperamos pacientemente la vuelta el encargado. Cuando llegรณ ni siquiera intentรณ una disculpa por nuestro tiempo perdido. Con soltura nos informรณ que necesitaba salir para aprovechar una oferta. Quedo claro que se manejaba a su antojo. La familiaridad con nuestros familiares fallecidos le daba ciertos permisos. Manejarse sin disimular su poca empatรญa era uno de ellos.
Acto seguido nos alertรณ que al vernos adentro otros se animarรญan a entrar. No vimos ningรบn auto por kilรณmetros, nos pareciรณ raro el comentario, pero al rato se confirmรณ que tenรญa razรณn. El hombre, nos guste o no, conocรญa los gajes de su oficio.
Momentos despuรฉs otros deudos estaban recorriendo el sector nuevo del cementerio. Todo esto sin hacer contacto visual con nosotros. En el cementerio rige un principio de privacidad del dolor.
El terreno no es muy grande y muchos de mis antepasados estรกn en el lado mรกs antiguo. Todas las tumbas miran a Jerusalรฉn, la ciudad sagrada. Esto se debe a la creencia de que, en el momento adecuado, los muertos no dudaran hacia dรณnde dirigirse para su resurrecciรณn.
Me propuse tomar en serio el pedido de saludar y decidรญ pasar por donde estรกn los restos de cada uno de mis parientes y observarlos con nuevos ojos ahora que yo tambiรฉn tengo la edad en que la muerte es una posibilidad cierta. Frente a ellos, es natural que surja un dialogo รญntimo y silencioso.
Casi todos fallecieron antes de la era de la fotografรญa digital, asรญ que imagino la dificultad de buscar entre รกlbumes de fotos una que pudiera ser apta para el recuerdo. Para perpetuar el rostro por generaciones. Algunas de esas fotografรญas, lamento, no han hecho honor a los rostros de mis seres queridos. Con ayuda de mi memoria fui sacando conclusiones de cรณmo vivieron, de que legado dejaron en el espรญritu de sus parientes.
Mientras recorrรญamos las tumbas fui reviviendo emociones y preguntas de diferentes etapas de mi vida. En especial frente a la tumba de mi mama, donde siempre vuelvo a sentirme ese niรฑo vulnerable de 10 aรฑos que tuvo que decir unas palabras, en su carรกcter de primogรฉnito, en la ceremonia del entierro. Es inexplicable desde la razรณn, pero comprensible desde las emociones: el tiempo parece no haber pasado en ciertos instantes.
Pensรฉ en mandar a hacer una placa con alguno de los tantos poemas que hice sobre ella. Falleciรณ muy joven y esos versos me permiten tenerla presente a falta de otros recuerdos de momentos felices. Pero luego pensรฉ que nadie hacia nada parecido y no quiero llamar la atenciรณn.
Acompaรฑado por mi primo, sentรญa que nada malo podรญa pasarme. Cuando รฉramos chicos me llevรณ a descubrir lugares alejados de la severa mirada adulta, mucho mรกs pudorosa que la nuestra.
Fue en la infancia que nos dijeron que las tumbas mirando al paredรณn entrando por la derecha habรญan hecho cosas malas. Nos prohibieron andar curioseando por ahรญ, no vaya a ser cosa que nos contagiemos.
Decรญan que eran mujeres de mala vida, usureros o ladrones. Incluso de suicidas, porque parece ser que a ningรบn ser humano le estรก permitido ser artรญfice de su propia muerte.
Sorprende que los marginados de la sociedad aceptaran estar de espaldas mirando a la pared. ยฟSi vivieron al margen de la ley, porque no buscar otro lugar donde dejar sus restos? Es evidente que temรญan mรกs a la otra vida que a los castigos en esta. O, bien, que sabรญan cรณmo lidiar con las cosas terrenas, pero ignoraban como manejarse en otros mundos. Estar de espaldas contra el muro es lo que les ocurre a los delincuentes cuando son capturados. Solo son liberados si tienen buenos abogados, no importa su culpabilidad. ยฟHabrรก abogados en lo que nos espera luego de la muerte fรญsica?
La verdad es que, aunque ocultos tras el muro, miran en la misma direcciรณn que las otras tumbas, por lo tanto, una vez que llegue el Mesรญas y comience la resurrecciรณn, tal vez despuรฉs de todo el resto, podrรกn llegar a Jerusalรฉn. Eso no ocurrirรญa enterrados en el cementerio de los gentiles. Querรญan asegurarse, por lo que descuento, pagarรญan bien caro ese curioso privilegio.
Nos animamos a ver cรณmo eran las tumbas de aquellos repudiados por la sociedad. Siempre me intrigaron y tenรญamos tiempo disponible. No hay nada tan seductor como ver algo prohibido. Las otras oportunidades en que visite el cementerio, aunque ya adulto, las habรญa visto desde prudente distancia.
Ahora que nuestros mayores descansan del lado โbuenoโ del cementerio, no creo que se molestaran por nuestra ocurrencia. Ya no tenemos de quien ocultarnos. La โprohibiciรณnโ era una de los tantos rituales que se generan en cualquier sacrosanto. Como salir por un sendero diferente del que se entrรณ, o la prohibiciรณn de visitar a otros familiares fallecidos cuando se asiste a un entierro. Todas supersticiones que no estรกn en la Tora ni el Talmud pero que la gente cree a pie juntillas que en algรบn lado estรก escrito y eso lo convierte en palabra santa.
Me anime a fotografiar las tumbas de los impuros. Las placas que dejaron sus deudos son tan amorosas o falsas como las que deja cualquiera de nosotros. Son tumbas indistinguibles de los miembros mรกs probos de la comunidad.
ยฟVelaran sus parientes por ellos? Imagino que algunos de sus descendientes aun hoy usufructรบan sus mal habidos bienes. Da para pensar, que posiblemente, se cambiaron el apellido para no dejar nada librado a las asociaciones obvias.
Pero, lo mรกs importante, ยฟdรณnde se entierran hoy los corruptos, los estafadores, los ladrones de guante blanco?
Registro que la รบltima placa es de los aรฑos 70, son muchos aรฑos sin ninguna oveja negra a la que hay que enterrar de espalda. Algo debe de haber pasado para que la sensatez termine esta vergonzante tradiciรณn.
Veamos cada caso. Los usureros, a menudo, son ahora respetables banqueros. La mirada sobre los suicidas ha cambiado mucho. La condena ha dejado su lugar a la compasiรณn. De las mujeres de mala vida no habrรญa mucho para decir en los tiempos de la cancelaciรณn y del empoderamiento femenino. La costumbre, bastante absurda, por cierto, desapareciรณ por el propio paso del tiempo.
A la vuelta nos esperaba mi prima. Ella es de aquellas personas que no le gusta hablar de la muerte ni de los muertos. En su fuero รญntimo cree que nunca va a morir. Sueรฑa con vivir eternamente. No es que no lo sepa simplemente no estรก dispuesta a aceptarlo. No quiere pensar que tendrรก algรบn dรญa que abandonar este mundo. Se aferra a sus pequeรฑos hรกbitos, a sus cuidados, a su esperanza. Pero las palabras se escapan a veces de su celda y pregunta cosas como esta: “ยฟcรณmo estaban todos?โ. Fuera de ese contexto estas palabras no se comprenden. Ante eso, como corresponde hacer con las personas que uno ama solo hay que hacer silencio. Tengo la certeza de que a la muerte no le importa lo que pensemos. La muerte es invicta. Habla cuando tiene que hablar y nada la puede hacer callar.
No hay duda que todos tenemos un cementerio flotando a nuestro alrededor, consientes o no, vivimos pensando en nuestros muertos. Nadie es del todo ajeno a estos pensamientos.
Pero, algo es seguro, mal o bien, en el cementerio estaban todos. Nadie se va de allรญ por sus propios medios.
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Greetings to All
So far, the deceased relatives of my maternal family are fewer than the living members who live in my hometown. The same city where my grandparents formed the family to which I proudly belong. There were those who observed that we must not be careless, and if young people continue to emigrate, it could affect the sacred equation. It would be an unpleasant surprise to have fewer living relatives than those resting in the cemetery. Since cremation is not permitted within Judaism, the calculation is simple. Surrendering oneself to the land is the way to purify the soul. Tradition says that it is unwise to defy fate.
There is no way to retain young people who think of seeking new horizons. We are descendants of the boldest, those who survived persecution thanks to their temerity in emigrating to these noble lands. They did not understand the local language, but where it was said that if you sow a seed, you will reap money. It’s true that they didn’t have much to lose in their countries of origin; staying meant enduring hunger and violence. The intrepid spirit remains in their blood, even when the landscape changes, and what’s happening was only to be expected. I’m sorry to say, but at some point these fears will come true, and fewer of the living will dwell in the southern city than those who rest in the cemetery.
Dizzy with these thoughts, I go to visit the graves of my deceased relatives. My cousin offered to accompany me; she describes herself as a serial cemetery visitor. She tells me that the Hebrew translation is beit chaim, the house of life. For her, it’s always a good time to visit them. She’s one of those relatives in every family who dedicates himself to honoring the memory of their ancestors.
When my cousin found out, she naturally sent me her greetings to everyone. I didn’t say anything so as not to offend her.
Jewish cemeteries are well maintained as long as there are mourners in the city who care for them. In those villages where almost no community members live, the few who remain hold the keys in case a distant relative feels the need to delve into their past. Or to welcome a curious lover of necrotourism.
Land is scarce, and cities grow wherever they can find space. The worst thing for a cemetery is to be in the middle of a town because it increases the risk of looters, who are always present. Or of entrepreneurs who need land for their investments.
This cemetery has been left far from the access routes to the city; nothing happens near that dirt road. Its neighbors are brick kilns, probably without legal authorization. And a large clandestine garbage dump without municipal control. Plastic bags, blown by the wind, end up caught in the fences of neighboring fields. This sad landscape reminded me that several passages in the Bible speak of a public garbage dump located south of Jerusalem. In this place, not only the corpses of criminals and sacrificed animals were dumped, but also the city’s waste.
The association between Gehenna, the name of the garbage dump, and eternal damnation was primarily due to the flames that constantly burned to consume the waste. An image of destruction and death. Furthermore, the stench and putrefaction emanating from this place added a sense of horror and desolation that came to be associated with eternal torment. From this arose the idea of โโhell for sinners.
A garbage dump near the cemetery is like summoning a nearby hell. The community should do something about it because it’s a disappointing sight. But, at the same time, not bad for a cemetery that wants to go unnoticed.
When we arrived, we saw that there was a closed sign on the old gate. We were surprised because the Hebrew calendar didn’t include any religious commemoration.
It must necessarily be temporary.
I didn’t have another time to visit and was passing through the city, so we waited patiently for the caretaker to return. When he arrived, he didn’t even attempt to apologize for our lost time. He casually informed us that he needed to leave to take advantage of an offer. It was clear he had his way. His familiarity with our deceased relatives gave him certain permissions. Being able to do so without hiding his lack of empathy was one of them.
He then warned us that seeing us inside would encourage others to enter. We didn’t see any cars for miles; we thought the comment was odd, but it soon became clear that he was right. The man, like it or not, knew the ins and outs of his job.
Moments later, other mourners were touring the new section of the cemetery. All of this without making eye contact with us. The cemetery is governed by a principle of privacy in grief.
The plot isn’t very large, and many of my ancestors are on the older side. All the graves face Jerusalem, the holy city.
Feminine practice. The custom, quite absurd, by the way, disappeared with the passage of time.
My cousin was waiting for us on our return. She’s one of those people who doesn’t like to talk about death or the dead. Deep down, she believes she’ll never die. She dreams of living forever. It’s not that she doesn’t know it, she’s just not willing to accept it. She doesn’t want to think that one day she’ll have to leave this world. She clings to her little habits, her cares, her hope. But sometimes the words escape from her cell, and she asks things like this: “How was everyone?” Outside of that context, these words are incomprehensible. Faced with this, as is appropriate with the people one loves, one must simply remain silent. I am certain that death doesn’t care what we think. Death is undefeated. It speaks when it must speak, and nothing can silence it.
There’s no doubt that we all have a cemetery floating around us, whether we realize it or not, we live thinking about our dead. No one is completely immune to these thoughts.
But one thing is certain, whether good or bad, everyone was in the cemetery. No one leaves on their own.
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Libros de Jorge Santovsky/Books by Jorge Santovsky
โRevelacionesโ por la Editorial Huesos de Jibia 2010- Ciudad de Buenos Aires
โRevelaciones acerca de otras criaturasโ por la Editorial Huesos de Jibia 2011
โBreves โpor la editorial Colectivo Semilla 2013 de la ciudad de Bahรญa Blanca
โEl sonido de la atenciรณnโ Editorial Huesos de Jibia 2014 Ciudad de Buenos Aires
โLa incomodidadโ Editorial Huesos de Jibia 2015 Ciudad de Buenos Aires
Narrative: โDiario de un cuentenikโ de la editorial Leviatรกn 2020
Federico Andahazi naciรณ en Buenos Aires, Argentina en 1963. Se graduรณ como licenciado en psicologรญa en la Universidad de Buenos Aires. En 1996 obtuvo el Primer Premio de Cuentos de la Segunda Bienal de Arte Joven por Almas misericordiosas, y el Primer Premio del Concurso Anual Literario ยซDesde la Genteยป por su cuento “El sueรฑo de los justos”. En 1996 su novela El anatomista fue finalista del Premio Planeta Argentina y recibiรณ el primer premio de la Fundaciรณn Amalia Lacroze de Fortabat. En verano de 2005 el diario Clarรญn publicรณ el folletรญn Mapas del fin del mundo. En 2006 Andahazi recibiรณ el Premio Planeta por su novela El conquistador.ย Tambiรฉn ha publicado no ficciรณn: Pecar como Dios manda, Historia sexual de los argentinos I (2008), Argentina con pecado concebida.Historia sexual de los argentinos II (2009),12 Pecadores y pecadoras. Historia sexual de los argentinos III (2010) y El equilibrista (2017).
Federico Andahazi was born in Buenos Aires, Argentina in 1963. He graduated with a degree in psychology from the University of Buenos Aires. In 1996 he won First Prize for Short Stories at the Second Biennial of Young Art for Merciful Souls, and First Prize in the Annual Literary Contest “Desde la Gente” for his short story “El sueรฑo de los justos”. In 1996 his novel El anatomista was a finalist for the Premio Planeta Argentina and received first prize from the Amalia Lacroze de Fortabat Foundation. In the summer of 2005 the newspaper Clarรญn published the serial Mapas del fin del mundo (Maps of the End of the World). In 2006 Andahazi received the Premio Planeta for his novel El conquistador (The Conqueror). He has also published non-fiction: Pecar como Dios manda, Historia sexual de los argentinos I (2008), Argentina con pecado concebida.Historia sexual de los argentinos II (2009),12 Pecadores y pecadoras. Historia sexual de los argentinos III (2010) y El equilibrista (2017).
Eliseo Fainzilber abriรณ los ojos y se encandilรณ con el resplandor del amanecer. Tenรญa el cuerpo entumecido y el cuello rรญgido, dolorido. Le costรณ recordar dรณnde estaba y cรณmo habรญa llegado hasta ese lugar. Se llevรณ la mano a la nuca y descubriรณ que debajo de la cabeza habรญa dos libros envueltos en un suรฉter enrollado a manera de almohada. Los desenvolviรณ y leyรณ los tรญtulos con los pรกrpados entrecerrados para atenuar la claridad temprana del verano. Se trataba de una ediciรณn de la รtica de Aristรณteles y otra del Libro VI de Diรณgenes Laercio. En este รบltimo volumen, el historiador griego daba testimonio de la vida de su tocayo de Sรญnope. Habรญan sido las รบltimas lecturas de Eliseo antes de que se durmiera bajo la lรกnguida luz de un farol. Segรบn pudo reconstruir, esos restos mnรฉmicos fueron la arcilla con la que modelรณ su curioso sueรฑo griego. Habrรญa contribuido โconjeturรณโ el inesperado hecho de haber dormido bajo las estrellas, igual que el viejo vagabundo del รกgora. Fainzilber transitaba ese lรญmite difuso, perturbador, entre el sueรฑo y el despertar; no podรญa distinguir todavรญa de quรฉ lado de la frontera se encontraba. Tendido como estaba, se incorporรณ sobre los codos; sintiรณ que se le rompรญa el espinazo. Tenรญa la columna vertebral tan arqueada como las tablas vencidas del banco en el que amaneciรณ. Mirรณ hacia un costado y vio el puente de hierro sobre las vรญas de la estaciรณn Coghlan. Le costรณ reconocer, en ese alegre y colorido paisaje estival, el escenario sombrรญo en el que se habรญa dormido la noche anterior. Sobre el andรฉn, unas pocas personas esperaban el tren. Sintiรณ vergรผenza de solo imaginar que alguien pudiera reconocerlo. No tardรณ en descubrir, sin embargo, que era virtualmente invisible. De hecho, nadie le dirigรญa la mirada ni le prestaba la menor atenciรณn. Mรกs aรบn, nadie se habรญa sentado en el sector del banco que quedaba libre. La gente mantenรญa una prudente distancia hecha de aprensiรณn e indiferencia. Bajรณ los pies, se enderezรณ, se apoyรณ en el respaldo y moviรณ la cabeza de izquierda a derecha y de arriba abajo; las vรฉrtebras del cuello crepitaron como ramas al quebrarse. Repuesto de un breve mareo, hizo un rรกpido inventario de sus pertenencias. Tenรญa los dos libros, el suรฉter de hilo azul y el llavero prendido al cinturรณn. Metiรณ la mano en el bolsillo trasero del pantalรณn y comprobรณ que conservaba la billetera con las tarjetas de crรฉdito, los documentos y unos pocos billetes. En el bolsillo delantero derecho guardaba el celular. Lo sacรณ, mirรณ la pantalla y pulsรณ el botรณn de inicio. La baterรญa estaba muerta y no tenรญa el cargador. Al menos, se consolรณ, no le faltaba nada de lo poco que se habรญa podido llevar despuรฉs de que su mujer lo invitara a abandonar la casa el dรญa anterior. El sueรฑo, del que Eliseo no acababa de liberarse del todo, le habรญa provocado mรกs angustia que el recuerdo de la discusiรณn conyugal. Ni siquiera el hecho de haber pasado la noche fuera de su casa le causรณ mรกs pesadumbre que la asociaciรณn onรญrica con Diรณgenes, el homeless mรกs cรฉlebre de todos los tiempos. Mirรณ hacia el andรฉn opuesto y se encontrรณ con los ojos inquisidores de un viejo huรฉsped de la estaciรณn que, igual que รฉl, acababa de despertarse en otro asiento. Cruzaron miradas de un lado al otro de las vรญas. El hombre lo saludรณ con una inclinaciรณn de cabeza. Eliseo Fainzilber bajรณ la vista perturbado y hasta cierto punto agraviado. Temiรณ que alguien pudiera pensar que ese vagabundo y รฉl fueran lo mismo. No, รฉl no era uno de ellos. Mรกs aรบn, ni siquiera era usuario del tren. Hacรญa muchos aรฑos que no tomaba el transporte pรบblico; de hecho, manejaba un Land Rover Discovery y, de haber podido manotear las llaves antes de salir de la casa, habrรญa dormido en la mullida butaca del auto con aire acondicionado y mรบsica tenue. Tenรญa la boca pastosa y una sed desรฉrtica. Se ordenรณ el pelo con las manos, se desperezรณ con discreciรณn, ocultรณ un bostezo profundo detrรกs del puรฑo y finalmente se levantรณ. Asรญ, vertical, se sintiรณ uno mรกs entre la gente decente e, incluso, algo superior. Con el suรฉter sobre los hombros y los libros bajo el brazo, se dispuso a abandonar la estaciรณn. Volviรณ a mirar al hombre que aรบn remoloneaba desaliรฑado sobre el banco del andรฉn contrario, como si quisiera hacerle notar el abismo, mucho mรกs profundo que el foso de las vรญas, que existรญa entre ellos. La camisa Ralph Lauren, aunque arrugada, el abrigo Lacoste sobre los hombros y las lecturas clรกsicas marcaban el contraste con los harapos de su circunstancial vecino de enfrente. Lo mirรณ con un desprecio involuntario, acaso para que quedara claro que no eran colegas. El hombre le contestรณ con una sonrisa cรณmplice y burlona como si asรญ le dijera: โYa nos volveremos a verโ. Eliseo Fainzilber se dio media vuelta, bajรณ la escalera y apurรณ el paso hacia la calle. En la avenida Monroe entrรณ en una farmacia y tomรณ un cepillo de dientes, dentรญfrico, un desodorante, una botella de agua mineral, ibuprofeno y chicles. Sintiรณ que el sencillo acto de comprar lo redimรญa de su nueva condiciรณn nรณmade, que suponรญa transitoria. Cuando llegรณ a la caja entregรณ la tarjeta de crรฉdito con un pase de prestidigitaciรณn de los dedos รญndice y mayor. La cajera ingresรณ el cรณdigo y esperรณ. El display marcรณ error. Volviรณ a oprimir las teclas y, otra vez, la misma leyenda. Le devolviรณ la tarjeta y, sin mirarlo, le dijo: โNo estรก habilitada. โยฟCรณmo? โNo estรก habilitada, seรฑor. Eliseo Fainzilber sacudiรณ la cabeza y le entregรณ una segunda tarjeta. La mujer repitiรณ la operaciรณn y una vez mรกs, como si fueran las tres รบnicas palabras que conociera, le dijo: โNo estรก habilitada. La gente que estaba en la fila se impacientaba. El hombre le dio entonces una tercera tarjeta. Lo mismo. Las tres tarjetas estaban inhabilitadas. En un movimiento rรกpido, como si quisiera pasar del oprobio a la ostentaciรณn, sacรณ todos los billetes del bolsillo y los contรณ sobre el mostrador. No le alcanzaba. Dejรณ los chicles y los analgรฉsicos, pagรณ y saliรณ de la farmacia como una exhalaciรณn. Mientras se cepillaba los dientes en el baรฑo de un bar, recordรณ que la titular de las tarjetas y, de hecho, tambiรฉn de las cuentas bancarias era Martina, su mujer. Golpeรณ el borde del lavatorio con el puรฑo. Estaba furioso con el banco, con la farmacia, con la cajera y con el vagabundo de la estaciรณn. Aquella indignaciรณn general no la incluรญa, sin embargo, a Martina. El dolor en los nudillos y el hilo de sangre en la loza cuarteada le hicieron ver que, en realidad, se estaba castigando a sรญ mismo. No sabรญa cuรกnto podรญa durarle el enojo a Martina o si alguna vez lo iba a perdonar, pero รฉl no podรญa pasar mucho mรกs tiempo en la calle. Apenas le quedaba plata para el cafรฉ y la medialuna que acababa de pedir. Por otra parte, necesitaba baรฑarse, afeitarse y cambiarse. Era la primera vez en varios aรฑos que no iba a trabajar un dรญa de semana. Sentado en una mesa junto a la ventana del bar, con la mirada perdida en el frente del hospital Pirovano, Eliseo debiรณ reconocer algo que no habรญa querido ver durante los รบltimos tiempos: que toda su vida giraba alrededor de Martina. El negocio familiar que รฉl habรญa administrado hasta ese dรญa le pertenecรญa a la familia de ella. La casa en la que convivรญan tambiรฉn era de Martina desde antes de conocerse. El Land Rover que manejaba, y que habรญa elegido รฉl a pesar de la oposiciรณn de su mujer, estaba a nombre de la sociedad de la otra empresa de Martina. Mientras estiraba el magro desayuno, Eliseo habรญa podido darle un poco de carga al celular gracias a la buena voluntad del encargado del bar. Lo primero que se le ocurriรณ fue llamar a Leopoldo y Alejandra, sus amigos de toda la vida. Pero recordรณ que eran amigos de toda la vida, sรญ, pero de su mujer. Mรกs aรบn, a Leopoldo y Alejandra los habรญa presentado Martina antes de que Eliseo llegara a su vida. Era obvio que iban a ponerse del lado de ella. A sus propios amigos los habรญa dejado de ver hacรญa mucho tiempo. Ademรกs de la humillaciรณn que significarรญa acudir a ellos derrotado y solo, tampoco tenรญa la certeza de que pudieran o quisieran ayudarlo. De cualquier modo, las dudas le duraron muy poco; cuando encendiรณ el telรฉfono recibiรณ una notificaciรณn inapelable: la lรญnea habรญa sido dada de baja. Eliseo cerrรณ los ojos y asintiรณ en silencio, resignado ante la evidencia. La titular de la lรญnea era, quiรฉn si no, Martina Paz. Jaque mate. No tenรญa ningรบn casillero a donde moverse. De la noche a la maรฑana se habรญa convertido en Diรณgenes, el admirado personaje de sus lecturas, cuyo destino tanto temรญa. El sueรฑo se le habรญa manifestado como un orรกculo: igual que el filรณsofo callejero, Eliseo Fainzilber estaba librado a la intemperie del รกgora. O, dicho de otra forma, se habรญa quedado en la calle, solo y sin un centavo.
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Psychodrom
Eliseo Fainzilber opened his eyes and was dazzled by the glow of dawn. His body felt numb, and his neck was stiff and aching. He struggled to remember where he was or how he had gotten there. He placed his hand on the back of his neck and discovered two books wrapped in a sweater rolled up like a pillow beneath his head. He unwrapped them and read the titles with his eyelids half closed to attenuate the early summer light. They were an edition of Aristotle’s Ethics and another of Book VI by Diogenes Laertius. In the latter volume, the Greek historian gave an account of the life of his namesake from Sinope. These had been Eliseo’s last readings before he fell asleep under the languid light of a lantern. As far as he could reconstruct, these mnemonic remnants were the clay from which he modeled his curious Greek dream. It had been a factor, he conjectured, in the unexpected fact of having slept under the stars, like the old vagabond in the agora. Fainzilber was traversing that diffuse, disturbing boundary between sleep and awakening; he couldn’t yet distinguish which side of the border he was on. Lying as he was, he propped himself up on his elbows; he felt his spine break. His spine was as arched as the sagging planks of the bench where he’d woken up. He looked to one side and saw the iron bridge over the tracks at Coghlan Station. It was hard for him to recognize, in that cheerful and colorful summer landscape, the gloomy scene where he had fallen asleep the night before. On the platform, a few people were waiting for the train. He felt ashamed to even imagine that anyone could recognize him. He soon discovered, however, that he was virtually invisible. In fact, no one even looked at him or paid the slightest attention. What’s more, no one had sat down in the vacant section of the bench. People maintained a prudent distance, woven of apprehension and indifference. He put his feet up, straightened, leaned back, and shook his head from left to right and up and down; the vertebrae in his neck crackled like snapping branches. Recovering from a brief bout of dizziness, he quickly took stock of his belongings. He had his two books, his blue thread sweater, and the key ring attached to his belt. He reached into his back pocket and checked that he still had his wallet with his credit cards, ID cards, and a few bills. His cell phone was in his front right pocket. He took it out, looked at the screen, and pressed the start button. The battery was dead, and he didn’t have a charger. At least, he consoled himself, he wasn’t missing any of the little he’d been able to take with him after his wife had invited him to leave the house the day before. The dream, from which Elisha had not yet completely shaken off, had caused him more anguish than the memory of the marital argument. Not even the fact that he had spent the night away from home caused him more grief than the dreamlike association with Diogenes, the most famous homeless man of all time. He looked toward the opposite platform and met the inquisitive eyes of an old station guest who, like him, had just arrived. waking up in a different seat. They exchanged glances across the tracks. The man nodded to him. Eliseo Fainzilber looked down, disturbed and somewhat offended. He feared someone might think he and this homeless man were one and the same. No, he wasn’t one of them. In fact, he wasn’t even a train passenger. It had been many years since he had taken public transport; in fact, he drove a Land Rover Discovery, and if he’d been able to grab the keys before leaving the house, he would have slept in the soft seat of the car with air conditioning and soft music playing. His mouth was pasty and he was desperately thirsty. He smoothed his hair with his hands, stretched discreetly, hid a deep yawn behind his fist, and finally stood up. Thus, upright, he felt like one of the decent people, and even somewhat superior. With his sweater over his shoulders and his books under his arm, he prepared to leave the station. He looked again at the man still loitering disheveled on the bench on the opposite platform, as if he wanted to point out the chasm, much deeper than the trench between them. The Ralph Lauren shirt, though wrinkled, the Lacoste coat draped over his shoulders, and the classical reading material marked the contrast with the rags of his casual neighbor across the street. He looked at him with involuntary contempt, perhaps to make it clear they weren’t friends. The man answered with a knowing, mocking smile as if to say, “We’ll see each other again.” Eliseo Fainzilber turned around, went down the stairs, and hurried toward the street. On Monroe Avenue, he entered a pharmacy and grabbed a toothbrush, toothpaste, deodorant, a bottle of mineral water, ibuprofen, and gum. He felt that the simple act of shopping redeemed him from his new nomadic condition, which he assumed was temporary. When he got to the checkout, he handed over his credit card with a sleight of hand with his index and middle fingers. The cashier entered the code and waited. The display showed an error. He pressed the keys again, and again, the same message appeared. He handed the card back and, without looking at him, said, “It’s not enabled.” “What?” “It’s not enabled, sir.” Eliseo Fainzilber shook his head and handed him a second card. The woman repeated the operation and once again, as if they were the only three words she knew, said, “It’s not enabled.” The people in line were getting impatient. The man then gave her a third card. The same thing. All three cards were disabled. In a swift movement, as if he wanted to go from disgrace to ostentation, he took all the bills out of his pocket and counted them on the counter. He didn’t have enough. He put down his gum and painkillers, paid, and left the pharmacy in a flash. While brushing his teeth in the bathroom of a bar, he remembered that the owner of the cards, and in fact, also of the bank accounts, was Martina, his wife. He slammed his fist on the edge of the sink. He was furious with the bank, the pharmacy, the cashier, and the homeless man at the station. This general indignation didn’t extend to Martina, however. The pain in his knuckles and the trickle of blood on the cracked tiles made him realize that, in reality, he was punishing himself. He didn’t know how long his anger at Martina would last or if she would ever forgive him, but he couldn’t spend much longer on the streets. He barely had enough money for the coffee and croissant he’d just ordered. On top of that, he needed to shower shave, and change. It was the first time in several years that he hadn’t been going to work on a weekday. Sitting at a table by the window of the Standing at the bar, his gaze fixed on the front of Pirovano Hospital, Eliseo must have recognized something he hadn’t wanted to see in recent times: that his entire life revolved around Martina. The family business he had managed until that day belonged to her family. The house they lived in also belonged to Martina, since before they met. The Land Rover he drove, which he had chosen despite his wife’s opposition, was registered in the name of Martina’s other company. While he stretched out his meager breakfast, Eliseo had been able to charge his cell phone a little thanks to the goodwill of the bar manager. The first thing that came to his mind was to call Leopoldo and Alejandra, his lifelong friends. But he remembered they were lifelong friends, yes, but his wife’s. What’s more, Martina had introduced Leopoldo and Alejandra to him before Eliseo came into his life. It was obvious they were going to side with her. He had stopped seeing his own friends a long time ago. Besides the humiliation of going to them defeated and alone, he also had no certainty that they could or would help him. In any case, his doubts lasted very little; when he turned on the phone, he received an irrevocable notification: the line had been disconnected. Eliseo closed his eyes and nodded silently, resigned to the evidence. The owner of the line was, who else, Martina Paz. Checkmate. He had no place to move. Overnight, he had become Diogenes, the admired figure in his readings, whose fate he so feared. The dream had manifested itself to him like an oracle: like the street philosopher, Eliseo Fainzilber was left to the elements of the agora. Or, to put it another way, he had been left on the street, alone and penniless.
___________________________________
_________________________________________________
Libros de Federico Andahasi/Books by Federico Andahasi
Sergio Lererย naciรณ en 1948ย y se criรณ en una familia judรญa con raรญces artรญsticas. Su padre fue actor en Polonia, su madre ceramista, y sus hermanas se dedicaron al canto lรญrico y la literatura. Desde joven se volcรณ al circuito en idioma idish, dentro del grupo filodramรกtico del TES. En sus comienzos interpretรณย obras clรกsicasย bajo la direcciรณn de Samuel Rollasky. Pronto obtuvo notoriedad con su papel en la obraย Es difรญcil ser judรญoย y por haber acompaรฑado durante cuatro aรฑos al humoristaย Norman Erlich. En ese mismo รกmbito, tambiรฉn coprotagonizรณย Draculovich, el vampiro que faltaba, y se luciรณ en piezas comoย La familia, Jasie la huรฉrfanaย yย Habรญa una vez una aldea.
En televisiรณn, participรณ en muchas de las series mรกs exitosas de las รบltimas dรฉcadas:ย Los Simuladores, Todos contra Juan, Casados con hijos, Peor es nada, entre otras. Su paso por el cine incluye tรญtulos comoย El amor en una mujer gorda,El censor, Morir en San Hilario, La suerte estรก echada, Hijo del rรญo, Aporรญa, El Cheย yย Lucky Luke. Respecto a sus colaboraciones con estrellas internacionales, se recuerda su encuentro conย Madonna cuando protagonizรณย Evitaย y, conย Brad Pitt, durante el rodaje deย Siete aรฑos en el Tibet, en La Plata. El actor solรญa definirse como una persona que disfrutaba de mรบltiples pasiones: โMe divierte ir a los cafรฉs a estudiar y militar en la Asociaciรณn Argentina de Actoresโ,ย aseguraba. Tambiรฉn fue psicoanalista, profesor de Psicologรญa, traductor y docente de hebreo. Lerer dejรณ una marca profunda gracias aย su sensibilidad artรญstica, su compromiso con la cultura judรญa y su talento para conectar el escenario, el consultorio y el aulaย en una misma vocaciรณn de transmitir y conmover. De: Perfil
_________________________________________
Sergio Lerer was born in 1948 and grew up in a Jewish family with artistic roots. His father was an actor in Poland, his mother a ceramist, and his sisters dedicated themselves to opera singing and literature. From a young age, he became involved in the Yiddish-language circuit, within the TES philodramatic group. In his early days, he performed classical works under the direction of Samuel Rollasky. He soon gained notoriety for his role in the play It’s Difficult to Be Jewish and for having accompanied the comedian Norman Erlich for four years. In the same field, he also co-starred in Draculovich, the Missing Vampire, and shone in plays On television, he participated in many of the most successful series of recent decades: Los Simuladores, Todos contra Juan, Casados โโcon hijos, Peor es nada, among others. His work in film includes titles such as El amor en una mujer gordo, El censor, Morir en San Hilario, La suerte estรก echada, Hijo del rรญo, Aporia, El Che and Lucky Luke. Regarding his collaborations with international stars, we remember his meeting with Madonna when she starred in Evita and, with Brad Pitt, during the filming of Siete aรฑos en el Tibet, in La Plata. The actor used to define himself as a person who enjoyed multiple passions: โI enjoy going to cafes to study and being an activist in the Argentine Actors Association,โ he said. He was also a psychoanalyst, psychology professor, translator and Hebrew teacher. Lerer left a profound mark thanks to his artistic sensitivity, his commitment to Jewish culture, and his talent for connecting the stage, the consulting room, and the classroom in a single vocation to transmit and move. From: Profile
______________________________________
De:/From: in the name of the son/in the name of the son — Trailer
Espaรฑol/Yiddish/Hebrew/English subtitles
__________________________________________
Unas pelรญculas y programas de televisiรณn con Sergio Lerer/Some movies and TV shows with Sergio Lerer
Yo no podรญa encontrar datos bibliogrรกficos de Ariana Stein Fourman. Le dedico esta pรกgina a ella./I couldn’t find any bibliographical information on Ariana Stein Fourman. I’m dedicating this page to her.
________________________________
“Recuerdo y exilio en la diรกspora judรญa argentina:
En รltimos poemas a Buenos Aires, Adriana SteinFourman, al igual que muchos escritores judรญos latinoamericanos contemporรกneos, explora la naturaleza del recuerdo y el exilio en el contexto de la justicia social, no solo en Amรฉrica, sino tambiรฉn en el contexto mรกs amplio de la polรญtica mundial. Su poemario, publicado como libro electrรณnico en 2015, rastrea el legado de la diรกspora judรญa en Argentina a travรฉs de sus propias experiencias y las de amigos y familiares, al evocar recuerdos de los desaparecidos durante la Guerra Sucia de 1974 a 1983. Algunos de los poemas de este poemario se publicaron inicialmente bajo el nombre de Adriana Stein Fourman en el Proyecto Desaparecidos para Argentina, el sitio web dedicado a la memoria de las vรญctimas del rรฉgimen militar y a desenmascarar a sus represores. Los temas del yo marginado o fragmentado, asรญ como el exilio interno y externo, comunes en las obras de las comunidades diaspรณricas a lo largo de la historia judรญa, tambiรฉn encuentran expresiรณn en la colecciรณn de Stein, junto con la recurrente historia de la Shoรก. De hecho, a travรฉs de su poesรญa, Adriana Stein contribuye al discurso mรกs amplio sobre las polรญticas de identidad, que sirve como testimonio literario de la lucha constante por los derechos humanos, centrada en las sociedades diaspรณricas de Amรฉrica Latina y otros lugares.
_______________________________
“Remembrance and Exile in Argentinaโs Jewish Diaspora: The Poetry of Adriana Stein”
Joan F. Marx
Muhlenberg College, Allentown, Pennsylvania, USA
In รltimos poemas a Buenos Aires, Adriana Stein Fourman, like many contemporary Jewish Latin American writers, explores the nature of remembrance and exile within the context of social justice not only in the Americas, but also within the broader context of world politics. Her collection of poetry, published as an e-book in 2015, traces the legacy of the Jewish diaspora in Argentina through her own experiences and those of friends and family as she summons memories of the disappeared during the Dirty War from 1974 to 1983. Some of the poems contained this collection were first published under the name of Adriana Stein Fourman on the Proyecto desaparecidos for Argentina, the website dedicated to the memory of the victims of the military regime and to exposing their repressors. Themes of the marginalized or fragmented self as well as both internal and external exile common in works by diasporic communities throughout Jewish history also find expression in Steinโs collection, along with the oft repeated history of Shoah. Indeed, through her poetry, Adriana Stein contributes to the wider discourse of the politics of identity that serves as literary testimony of the perpetual struggle for human rights that focuses on diasporic societies in Latin America and elsewhere.
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Alejandra Stein Fourman. รltimos poemas a Buenos Aires. Kindle Edition. 2015.
II รLTIMOS POEMAS A BUENOS AIRES,
Una estrella se enredรณ en tu pelo
Roja y sangrienta
Callada
Y te araรฑรณ la nuca y te araรฑรณ la sien
Hasta dolerte hasta llorarte.
Una estrella se clavรณ en tus ojos
Multicolores
Multirraciales
Hasta dejarte dos cuencas vacรญas
Y ciegas lรกgrimas
Blancas.
Una estrella asaltรณ tu pecho
Hiriรณ tus manos truncรณ tus pasos
Y andรกs ahora Convulsionada enloquecida
Fiera y digna agonizando y renaciendo
Cristo de estrellas
Dagas y espadas Blancas.
Barcelona, 26/11/1978
____________________________
II LAST POEMS TO BUENOS AIRES,
A star tangled in your hair
Red and bloody
Silent
And it scratched the back of your neck and scratched your temple
Until it hurt you until you cried.
A star pierced your eyes
Multicolored
Multiracial
Until it left you with two empty sockets
And blind tears
White.
A star assaulted your chest
It wounded your hands, cut short your steps
And now you walk Convulsed, mad
Fierce and dignified, dying and being reborn
Christ of stars
White daggers and swords.
Barcelona, โโ11/26/1978
______________________________
ยฟ???LA ECUACIรN DEL FUTURO
Ahora que la esperanza abre sus puertas
Ahora que los huesos aparecen
Y buscan otros huesos como amantes
Desesperados de abrazar el tiempo
Ahora que las lรกgrimas han hallado su cauce
Ahora que la tierra en su regazo
Acuna ya a sus hijos
Ahora que el antiguo rito
Puede ser consumado
Ahora que los muertos pueden
Descansar lo que queda de su carne
Ahora que la hiel se desprende del llanto
Ahora que la esperanza abre las puertas
Sobre un surco sediento de justicia
El futuro es una ecuaciรณn posible:
Ahora que la tierra
Cubre por fin tus huesos
Ahora que las rosas
Cubren por fin la tierra
Ahora que sabemos.
Donde velar tu sueรฑo. Marbella, 2002
_______________________________
THE EQUATION OF THE FUTURE
Now that hope opens its doors
Now that the bones appear
And they seek other bones like lovers
Desperate to embrace time
Now that tears have found their channel
Now that the earth in her lap
Now cradles her children
Now that the ancient rite
Can be consummated
Now that the dead can
Lay what remains of their flesh to rest
Now that the bile is released from tears
Now that hope opens its doors
On a furrow thirsting for justice
The future is a possible equation:
Now that the earth
Finally covers your bones
Now that the roses
Finally cover the earth
Now that we know.
Where to watch over your dream. Marbella, 2002
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VII CAROLINA A Carolina Segal, mi amiga.
Secuestrada en 1976.
Tenรญa veinte aรฑos.
En Buenos Aires estรก naciendo el dรญa
Entre furias y monstruos desatados.
En Buenos Aires estรก naciendo el dรญa Enlutecido Amordazado
Amortajado.
En Buenos Aires
_____________________________
VII CAROLINA
To Carolina Segal, my friend.
Kidnapped in 1976.
I was twenty years old.
In Buenos Aires, the day is dawning
Among unleashed furies and monsters.
In Buenos Aires, the day is dawning, Mourning, Gagged,
Shrouded.
In Buenos Aires
________________________
XIX
A Josรฉ Gabriel,
Que todavรญa no tenรญa un
Aรฑo cuando sus padres fueron secuestrados.
A Carolina Segal y Nรฉstor Rovegno,
Que no pudieron ver a su hijo
Habrรกs crecido lejos de mรญ
Pero eso no es lo importante.
Habrรกs crecido en Buenos Aires
La avenida Rivadavia
El parque
El panadero
Aquรฉl viejo almacรฉn.
Habrรกs crecido en Buenos Aires.
Le serรกs familiar
Tanto
Como yo te soy extraรฑa.
Pero eso no es lo importante.
La รบltima vez que te vi fue en un viejo cafรฉ.
Mirรกbamos gente.
Hablรกbamos.
Vivรญas en una casa con in patio sombrรญo
Una cocina grande y un moisรฉs todo
Blanco.
Tenรญas cinco meses y tal vez no te acuerdes.
Pero eso no es lo importante.
Ahora que tenรฉs tres aรฑos
Josรฉ Gabriel
Decรญme:
ยฟDรณnde termina tu ciudad?
ยฟA quinientas?
ยฟAmil?
ยฟY ti sonrisa?
ยฟHasta dรณnde llega
Josรฉ Gabriel
ยฟTu sonrisa?
ยฟHasta la muete?
ยฟHasta el dolorโ
ยฟY tu memoria?
ยฟLlegรณ a guardar dos pares de ojos azulados?
ยฟDos cabelleras rubias?
ยฟDos esperanzas?
ยฟDos esperanzas?
ยฟDos guitarras?
ยฟY tus pasos?
ยฟA dรณnde van
Josรฉ Gabriel
ยฟTus pasos?
ยฟQuรฉ manos buscan tus manos?
ยฟPara quiรฉn son tus besos?
ยฟPara quiรฉn es
Josรฉ Gabriel
Tu canto?
Ahora que tenรฉs tres aรฑos
Josรฉ Gabriel
Decรญme:
Cuรกndo tenรฉs miedo:
ยฟA quiรฉn llamรกs?
Cuando querรฉs amor:
ยฟA quiรฉn buscรกs?
Ahora que tenรฉs tres aรฑos
Josรฉ Gabriel
Decรญme:
A papรก y a mamรก
ยฟLos recordรกs?
Rennes, 8/10/1978
___________________________
XIX
To Josรฉ Gabriel,
Who was not yet a
Year old when his parents were kidnapped.
To Carolina Segal and Nรฉstor Rovegno,
Who could not see their son
You may have grown up far from me
But that’s not the important thing.
You may have grown up in Buenos Aires
Rivadavia Avenue
The park
The baker
That old store.
You may have grown up in Buenos Aires.
You will be familiar
As much
as I am a stranger to you.
But that’s not the important thing.
The last time I saw you was in an old cafรฉ.
We were people-watching.
We were talking.
You lived in a house with a shady patio
A large kitchen and a bassinet all
white.
You were five months old, and maybe you don’t remember.
But that’s not the important thing.
Now that you’re three years old
Josรฉ Gabriel
Tell me:
Where does your city end?
At five hundred?
A thousand?
And your smile?
How far does your smile go
Josรฉ Gabriel
until death?
Even the pain?
And your memory?
Did it manage to hold two pairs of blue eyes?
Two blond hairs?
Two hopes?
Two hopes?
Two guitars?
And your steps?
Where do they go, Josรฉ Gabriel?
Your steps?
Whose hands do your hands seek?
Who are your kisses for?
Who is your song for?
Now that you are three years old, Josรฉ Gabriel
Tell me:
When you are afraid:
Who do you call?
When you want love:
Who are you looking for?
Now that you are three years old, Josรฉ Gabriel
Tell me:
Dad and Mom
Do you remember them?
Rennes, 10/8/1978
_______________________
XXVI JUDรA ERRANTE
Yo irรฉ a matar la Buenos Aires celeste
El recuerdo
El sueรฑo La nostalgia.
Hipnotizada
Atravesarรฉ mi Vรญa Crucis Cuenta atrรกs
Hasta tocar las tumbas que aรบn me esperan
En esa ciudad donde hoy serรฉ extranjera
Donde nadie me reconocerรก
Donde nadie dice ya Mi nombre.
Sobre un papel en blanco
En un viejo cafรฉ cuyas sillas conozco
Encontrarรฉ el camino hacia mi alumbramiento
El instante obscuro en que fue concebido
Mi exilio.
No sรฉ cuรกntas horas pasarรกn
Desgranando los aรฑos De la ausencia.
Sola en esa ciudad
Que fue la mรญa para luego ser
El amputado miembro de mi cuerpo
Comprenderรฉ que mรกs allรก de la distancia
El tiempo hizo lo suyo Inexorable.
Soy este muรฑรณn que incansable dialoga
Con los muertos; soy este รกrbol que sobreviviรณ la tala.
Y en vano busco sus raรญces. Soy esta libra de carne. Condenado a volar,
Asรญ donde nacรญ
Soy extranjera.
Ciudat de Palma, 6-10-86
_______________________________
XXVI WANDERING JEW
I will go to kill the celestial Buenos Aires
The memory
The dream
The nostalgia.
Hypnotized
I will go through my Stations of the Cross Countdown
Until I touch the graves that still await me
In that city where today I will be a stranger
Where no one will recognize me
Where no one says my name anymore.
On a blank sheet of paper
In an old cafรฉ whose chairs I know
I will find the path to my birth
The dark moment when my exile was conceived.
I don’t know how many hours will pass
Shearing off the years of absence.
Alone in that city
That was mine and then became
The amputated member of my body
I will understand that beyond the distance
Time did its inexorable thing.
I am this stump that tirelessly dialogues
With the dead; I am this tree that survived the felling.
And in vain I search for its roots. I am this pound of flesh. Condemned to fly,
So where I was born
I am foreigner.
City of Palma, 6-10-86
________________________________
XXIX ESPERANZA
Cรณmo quisiera que llegues
Trayendo buenas nuevas No una simple noticia:
Una promesa.
Que todo estรก cambiando
Que los verรฉ de nuevo
A ellos Los que quiero.
Que todo fue un mal sueรฑo
Que la cรกrcel no existe
Que la muerte estรก muerta.
Cรณmo quisiera que llegues
Con una carta abierta Un cielo despejado
Una promesa.
Enero, 1978
__________________________________
XXIX HOPE
How I wish you would arrive
Bringing good news Not just news:
A promise.
That everything is changing
That I will see them again
Them, the ones I love.
That it was all a bad dream
That prison doesn’t exist
That death is dead.
How I wish you would arrive
With an open letter, a clear sky
A promise.
January, 1978
_______________________
XXXIV LA VIDA ETERNA
Yo no soy sรณlo yo
Este cuerpo en la tierra
Estos ojos
Estos pies
Estas manos.
Yo no soy sรณlo yo.
Vengo desde muy lejos.
Soy los que quise y quiero
Los que son Los que fueron.
_______________________________
XXXIV ETERNAL LIFE
I am not only me
This body on earth
These eyes
These feet
These hands.
I am not only me.
I come from far away.
I am the ones I loved and the ones I love
The ones who are, the ones who were
_______________________________________
XXXV LOS RESTOS DEL NAUFRAGIO
Aquรญ en el silencio
Cuento Los maderos que llegan a la orilla
Hinchados por el agua y por el tiempo Reumรกticos. ยฟDรณnde estรก la que fuera otrora nave
Seรฑorial y altanera
Soberbia?
ยฟDe la proa a la popa la materia Inalterada,
Orgullosa De los embates por venir,
De los combates?
ยฟEl albo velamen poderoso
Brillante como el hielo
Desafiante?
ยฟLa quilla fornicadora de todos los mares?
ยฟDรณnde estรก la brรบjula que marcaba
El norte de la tierra y de los sueรฑos?
ยฟEl sextante?
ยฟLos mapas?
ยฟPasto de la fauna marina?
ยฟLos cofres rebosantes de promesas
Cerrados con siete llaves?
ยฟLas bengalas? ยกTripulantes!!!
ยฟTripulantes?
Aquรญ en el silencio
___________________________________
XXXV THE REMAINS OF THE SHIPWRECK
Here in the silence
I tell the story of the timbers that reach the shore
Swollen with water and time, rheumatic. Where is the ship that was once
Mauricio Lasansky in his studio, Iowa City, IA ca. 1965
Biografรญa
Nacido en Buenos Aires, in 1914, Mauricio Lasansky es uno de los pocos artistas modernos que han limitado su obra casi exclusivamente a los medios grรกficos. Gracias a sus tempranas contribuciones al desarrollo de las tรฉcnicas grรกficas y a su dedicaciรณn al grabado, Lasansky es considerado un precursor en la evoluciรณn de las artes grรกficas como forma de arte crรญtico y ha sido reconocido como uno de los “Padres del Grabado Americano del Siglo XX”.
En 1936, a los veintidรณs aรฑos, ya era director de la Escuela Libre de Bellas Artes de Villa Marรญa, Cรณrdoba, Argentina. En 1943, Lasansky recibiรณ la prestigiosa Beca Guggenheim, con la que viajรณ a Estados Unidos y estudiรณ la colecciรณn de grabados del Museo Metropolitano de Arte. Esta oportunidad no solo le proporcionรณ un vasto conocimiento sobre grabados y grabadores, sino que tambiรฉn le brindรณ la oportunidad de conocer y trabajar con varios maestros europeos que habรญan huido a Estados Unidos durante la guerra. Para 1952, no solo habรญa recibido numerosos reconocimientos, premios y galardones, y contaba con una impresionante colecciรณn de exposiciones, sino que tambiรฉn se habรญa consolidado como ciudadano estadounidense.
Durante la dรฉcada de 1940, el interรฉs por el grabado como arte se revitalizรณ gracias a los talleres de artes grรกficas de la Administraciรณn de Progreso de Obras (WPA), y muchos artistas continuaron explorando el mรฉtodo tras la suspensiรณn de los proyectos de la WPA. El mรกs importante de estos estudios fue el Atelier 17 de Nueva York, fundado por Stanley William Hayter. El suyo fue el primer taller estadounidense independiente creado para la experimentaciรณn exclusiva con el proceso de grabado calcogrรกfico. Gracias a la labor de Hayter, el estudio captรณ la atenciรณn de artistas de todo el paรญs. Muchos de estos artistas se conocen actualmente como la Escuela de Nueva York. Estos artistas adoptaron el expresionismo abstracto como medio de expresiรณn estilรญstica y su obra transformรณ radicalmente el curso del grabado calcogrรกfico en Estados Unidos.
Muchos artistas, incluyendo a Lasansky, trabajaron extensamente en el Atelier 17 formulando nuevos mรฉtodos y creando nuevas tรฉcnicas tanto para sus temas como para sus grabados. Posteriormente, varios fueron invitados a establecer talleres de grabado en departamentos de arte universitarios de todo el paรญs. Uno de los primeros artistas en aceptar este reto fue Mauricio Lasansky, quien fundรณ el importante taller de grabado en la Universidad de Iowa. Hasta el dรญa de hoy, sirve de modelo para numerosos departamentos universitarios de grabado, dirigidos por muchos de sus antiguos alumnos.
La transmisiรณn de tรฉcnicas e ideologรญas consolidadas sobre tรฉcnicas innovadoras de grabado, a travรฉs de generaciones de profesores y alumnos, marca el legado del Atelier 17. Y es Lasansky, una de las primeras generaciones de estos grabadores, quien ha influido en el desarrollo del grabado en Estados Unidos.
Conocido sobre todo por sus grabados a gran escala, en los que utiliza mรบltiples planchas y gamas cromรกticas completas, Lasansky combina una amplia gama de tรฉcnicas grรกficas, incluyendo el aguafuerte, la punta seca, el aguatinta y el grabado. A lo largo de su evoluciรณn estilรญstica, ha creado elocuentes evocaciones figurativas, coloridas, frescas y espontรกneas. Sus obras tempranas y tardรญas demuestran que su imaginerรญa ha abordado constantemente elementos que han experimentado cambios y expansiones a lo largo de su creaciรณn. Por lo tanto, el tema de su arte es tan importante como el aspecto tรฉcnico de sus grabados.
Los retratos de Lasansky se presentan como ideales humanรญsticos en comparaciรณn con las figuras deshumanizadas que aparecen en sus otros grabados. Muchos de sus retratos comienzan en un formato individual, pero en muchas ocasiones la figura idealizada se degenera y se presenta en un espacio grรกfico en lugar de pictรณrico. Tiene una especial consideraciรณn por el espectador, ya que retrata la imagen dentro de su espacio.
Lasansky se ha dedicado a explorar las posibilidades expresivas de las artes grรกficas. Ha acumulado un conjunto de grabados considerados entre los mรกs impactantes e impactantes del arte contemporรกneo. Ha contribuido significativamente a consolidar el grabado como una forma de arte significativa y crucial del siglo XX. Y, como resultado, se ha convertido en uno de los primeros de una generaciรณn de importantes grabadores en enseรฑar a decenas de estudiantes, quienes a su vez enseรฑan a decenas de generaciones futuras en este paรญs. Por todas estas razones, se le considera uno de los “Padres del Grabado Americano del Siglo XX”.
Lasansky ha recibido cinco Becas Guggenheim, seis Doctorados Honoris Causa en Artes y numerosos premios y distinciones especiales. Su obra estรก representada en mรกs de cien colecciones pรบblicas, incluyendo prรกcticamente todos los principales museos de Estados Unidos. Reconocido internacionalmente, ha expuesto en Amรฉrica del Norte y del Sur, Europa y Rusia. Ya jubilado de la Universidad de Iowa, sigue siendo una inspiraciรณn para los artistas por sus contribuciones, la riqueza e intensidad de sus superficies impresas y su estilo profundamente personal.
__________________________________ Biography
Born in Buenos Aires, in 1914, Mauricio Lasansky is one of the few modern artists who have limited their works almost exclusively to the graphic media. Due to his early contributions in the development of graphic techniques and his dedication to printmaking, Lasansky is considered to be a forerunner in the evolution of the graphic arts as a critical art form and has become recognized as one of the “Fathers of 20th Century American Printmaking.”
In 1936, at the age of twenty-two, he had already become the director of the Free Fine Arts School, in Villa Maria, Cordoba, Argentina. In 1943, Lasansky was offered the prestigious Guggenheim Fellowship in which he came to the United States and studied the print collection at the Metropolitan Museum of Art. This opportunity not only afforded him a wealth of knowledge about prints and printmakers but created an opportunity for him to be exposed to and work with a number of European masters who had fled to the United States during wartimes. By 1952, he had not only received a great deal of recognition, prizes and awards, and had an impressive line of exhibitions, but also had established himself as an American citizen.
During the 1940’s, the interest in printmaking as a fine art was revitalized by the Works Progress Administration graphic arts workshops and many artists continued to explore the method after the WPA projects were discontinued. The most important of these studios was the New York Atelier 17 established by Stanley William Hayter. His was the first independent American workshop developed for exclusive experimentation of the intaglio process of printmaking. Through Hayter’s efforts, the studio gained the attention of artists from around the country. Many of these artists are now referred to as the New York School. These artists adopted Abstract Expressionism as a means of stylistic expression and their work radically altered the course of intaglio printmaking in America.
Many artists, including Lasansky, worked extensively at the Atelier 17 formulating new methods and creating new techniques for their subjects as well as their prints. Several were later invited to develop print-shops in university art departments around the country. One of the first artists to accept this challenge was Mauricio Lasansky. He established the vital printmaking workshop at the University of Iowa. To this day, it serves as a model for numerous other university printmaking departments led by many of Lasansky’s former students.
It is the passing down of established techniques and ideologies about innovative printmaking techniques from generations of these teachers and students that marks the legacy of Atelier 17. And, it is Lasansky, one of the first generations of these printmakers, who has influenced the course of printmaking in the United States.
Best known for large scale prints in which he uses multiple plates and full ranges of color, Lasansky combines a spectrum of graphic techniques including etching, drypoint, aquatint and engraving. Throughout his stylistic evolution, he has created eloquent figural statements that are colorful, fresh and spontaneous. His early and late works show that his imagery has consistently dealt with elements which have undergone change and expansion as the work was created. Therefore, the subject of his art is as important as the technical aspect of his printmaking.
Lasansky’s portraits appear as humanistic ideals when compared to the dehumanized figures that appear in his other prints. Many of his portraits begin in an individual format, but many times the idealized figure degenerates and is presented in graphic rather than pictorial space. He has a special regard for the spectator, as he portrays the image within the viewer’s space.
Lasansky has devoted himself to exploring the expressive possibilities of graphic arts. He has amassed a body of prints considered to be some of the most powerful and impressive in contemporary art. He has contributed significantly in establishing printmaking as a meaningful and critical art form of the 20th century. And, as a result, he has become one of the first in a generation of important printmakers to teach scores of students, who in turn are teaching scores of future generations in this country. For all these reasons, he is considered to be one of the “Fathers of 20th Century American Printmaking.”
Lasansky has been the recipient of a total of five Guggenheim Fellowships, six honorary Doctorate of Arts degrees and numerous prizes and special honors. His work is represented in more than one hundred public collections including virtually every major museum in the United States. Internationally recognized, he has been exhibited throughout North and South America, Europe and Russia. Now retired from the University of Iowa, he continues to be an inspiration to artists for his contributions, his richly and intensely printed surfaces, and his highly personal style.
Perla Suez naciรณ en Cรณrdoba en 1947. Es escritora, profesora en Letras Modernas, egresada de la Universidad Nacional de Cรณrdoba, Argentina. Fue becaria del Gobierno Francรฉs y del Gobierno de Canadรก. En 1997 recibiรณ la Menciรณn especial del Premio Mundial de Literatura Infantil y juvenil Josรฉ Martรญ. En 2001, finalista del Premio Internacional de Novela Rรณmulo Gallegos con su novela Letargo. Sus novelas para adultos se han traducido al inglรฉs por The University of New Mรฉxico Press, Estados Unidos. Otras Publicaciones: Memorias de Vladimir; El รกrbol de los flecos, cuentos, 1995; Dimitri en la tormenta, novela juvenil; El viaje de un cuis muy gris, cuento; Blum, Cuentos; Tumba Tumba Retumba. Poetas de Amรฉrica, Antologรญa bilingรผe, selecciรณn, prรณlogo y notas de la autora, , 2001. Ahora que todo parece haber cambiado, cuento, en Antologรญa Nuevos Cuentos Argentinos, 2001. Tradujo del francรฉs la novela Una llama en la oscuridad de Franรงois David.
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Perla Suez was born in Cรณrdoba in 1947. She is a writer and professor of Modern Literature, a graduate of the National University of Cรณrdoba, Argentina. She was a scholarship recipient of the French and Canadian governments. In July 2001, she was a finalist for the Rรณmulo Gallegos International Novel Prize with her novel Letargo (Lethargo). Her novels for adults have been translated into English by The University of New Mexico Press, USA. Other publications include Memoirs of Vladimir, a novel, Ed. Colihue, Buenos Aires; The Tree of Fringe, short stories, 1995; Dimitri in the Storm, young adult novel, ; The Journey of a Very Gray Guinea Pig, short story; Blum, Short Stories, Tombo, Tombo Rumbo. Poets of the Americas, bilingual anthology, selection, prologue and notes by the author, 2001. Se translated Franรงois David’s novel A Flame in the Darkness from French.
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“En la arrocera”
“El ocultar las cosas es lo que las hace pudrirseโฆ”
John Dos Passos
Vasili y Ana Finz llegaron a Villa Clara con los inmigrantes que trajo el Barรณn Hirsch, a fines del siglo pasado. Finz se iniciรณ en el trabajo de la tierra como aguador de arrozal y aprendiรณ el oficio de arrocero. Al nacer Lucien, Ana muriรณ de eclampsia durante el puerperio. Finz arrendaba siete hectรกreas con una casa de adobe y un galpรณn. Un ama de leche amamantรณ al chico hasta que cumpliรณ un aรฑo y despuรฉs, los otros hijos de Finz se ocuparon de criarlo. El muchacho creciรณ en la arrocera, con la seguridad que le habรญan dado su padre y especialmente Max, el hermano mayor. Cuando Lucien no podรญa conciliar el sueรฑo, Max le hablaba de los cardos que a esa hora cerraban su flor morada, de los terraplenes donde cultivaban el arroz, de las mojarras del arroyo y tarareaba, moviendo la cabeza, a, el canto del cosaco: ayaya, yaya, yayaya…
Lucien miraba el cielo sin luna y pensaba que dentro de esa oscuridad estaba su madre. Max le contaba, tambiรฉn, la historia del emperador que se paseaba desnudo creyendo lucir un rico traje y una calma profunda invadรญa al niรฑo y quedaba dormido. Con las faenas de la tierra los brazos de Lucien se hicieron poderosos. Lucien, hay que dar vuelta el pan de tierra, hasta que quede esponjoso, le decรญa el padre. Los Finz se protegรญan del sol bajo la sombra de un eucalipto, y almorzaban alguna cosa frugal, tendidos sobre el pasto. Apenas echaban un sueรฑo y seguรญan trabajando. Con la entrada del sol comรญan con fruiciรณn, y bebรญan apenas una copa de vino, y hablaban de algรบn asunto baladรญ. Despuรฉs, se iban a descansar. Lucien preferรญa caminar un rato, antes de que el sueรฑo lo venciera. En el verano se escuchaba la enรฉrgica voz de Vasili que llamaba a los hijos y les advertรญa: Va a venir la lagarta militar. Busquen a Gonzรกlez, que cure de palabra a la lagarta. Pronto el arroz maduraba y se podรญan escuchar los gritos del muchacho que llamaba al padre y a sus hermanos, para que vieran la floraciรณn. ยกNoรฉ, Max, vengan a ver las espigas!
Cuando la cosecha era buena, los arroceros de las colonias vecinas se congregaban en torno a la casa de los Finz. Un tropel de mรบsicos con acordeones a piano y timbales hacรญa sonar los primeros compases del cosachok. Max era el primero que se paraba en medio del corro de muchachos y con el pecho desnudo, abierto de brazos, daba un salto impetuoso y empezaba la danza en cuclillas golpeando el suelo con las herraduras de las botas. Despuรฉs, hacรญa un giro en el aire, caรญa de nuevo en cuclillas, y continuaba bailando con gracia y desenfado. Viejos respetables, judรญos rusos, se plegaban a la danza cosaca y con pasos poderosos, como si se dejaran llevar por un placer irrepetible, cantaban, yaya yayaya… Lucien contemplaba todo, con la cabeza llena de ruido. Llovรญa desde hacรญa una semana y los caminos estaban anegados y el arroyo Malo desbordaba; ni siquiera los caballos podรญan cruzar hasta la otra orilla. Lucien caminรณ de la mano de su padre: no tenรญa mรกs de once aรฑos.
“Escucha el pampero, Lucien, dijo usted, con la cabeza inclinada, queriendo que yo escuchara el sonido preliminar del viento. Vasili tenรญa la vista fija en la arrocera. ยฟVa a despejar, padre?, le preguntรฉ yo. Usted me dijo que iba a despejar. La arrocera era una ciรฉnaga. El agua nos llegaba rodillas. Una madera podrida y una yararรก enroscada cruzaron ante mis ojos; una rata muerta y un nubarrรณn flotaban en el agua que continuaba su empuje furioso por encima de los terraplenes. Vasili, usted dijo que estuvo toda la noche contemplando la lluvia que caรญa y dijo haberse levantado de la ruina mรกs de una vez. Pero habรญa muchas cosas que usted no dijo…” Asรญ como la lagarta militar terminรณ el grano en unas horas; asรญ como la lluvia lo pudriรณ todo, asรญ tambiรฉn los Finz, no eran gente que se diera por vencida. Preparen todo que maรฑana nos vamos. ยฟPero adรณnde?, preguntรณ Max. A arrendar el campo que me ofrecieron en Carlos Casares. Probaremos sembrar trigo. Carlos Casares tambiรฉn estรก inundado, dijo Noรฉ. No querรฉs sacrificarte, dijo Vasili, la voz ronca, la mirada clavada en Noรฉ. Lucien recordรณ que la palabra de su padre era sagrada. “Vuelvo a verlo a usted padre, absorto, refugiado en el silencio, caminando despacio por el borde del canal. La cosecha estรก perdida, dice. El sol se ha escondido, la arrocera estรก fangosa huele a vรณmito. No hay viento. La tarde cae apacible. Escucho el graznido de una tijereta que cruza el aire y hay moscardones azul elรฉctrico que zumban por todos lados. Veo la negritud del cielo a lo lejos, escucho a los perros que lloran, y a usted padre, que murmura, y quรฉ puedo hacer yo… Durante mรกs de tres horas recorrimos la arrocera anegada. ยฟCรณmo estรก el nivel del agua en la varilla?, preguntรณ usted a Max. ยกMierda, sigue subiendo…!,dijo รฉl. ยกNo hable asรญ, estรก perdiendo la decencia!, dijo. Max le gritรณ, ยกCree que sigo siendo ese niรฑo a quien usted obligaba a acostarse al sol sobre una chapa de zinc caliente porque se negaba a obedecerle. Humillarse y sufrir, es lo รบnico que le gusta! ยกBasta! Dรญgame que mis esfuerzos no fueron en vano…, dijo Vasili. Y se alejรณ de la arrocera. El lamento de una lechuza perturbรณ la tarde que caรญa. Mirรฉ hacia el cielo y tuve miedo lo vi todo rojo, todo sangre. Vayamos a descansar y volveremos en cuanto baje el agua, dijo Noรฉ. ยฟDรณnde estรก Lucien?, preguntรณ Max. Pero yo que era un niรฑo que habรญa escuchado todo, me roalejรฉ sin decir nada. Sรณlo volvรญ la cabeza, cuando sentรญ los brazos de Max que me envolvรญan, ยกEi, Lucien, respirรก hondo y chupate el viento para adentro y subite a mis hombros, voy a llevarte a babuchas! Y me subรญ a sus hombros y nos fuimos trotando hasta casa.” “Mirรก Lucien por allรญ va a venir el Mesรญas trayendo paz y justicia, dijo usted. Y yo que era un niรฑo temeroso de Dios, creรญ verlo llegar, montado en su alazรกn blanco. Su cara delgada y su barba larga desaparecieron en cuanto abrรญ los ojos: Me quedรฉ insomne, padre.” Lucien caminaba por la arrocera, cuando escuchรณ que alguien cantaba una balada en el dialecto de los abuelos y la sintiรณ como una amenaza: …Voy de viaje en trineo,/ a travรฉs de la estepa nevada,/ los lobos me pisan los talones… La tierra retumbaba en sus oรญdos. Oyรณ un rumor sordo. Apurรณ el paso. Era seguro que la tormenta harรญa estragos en el semental. Al llegar a su casa escuchรณ que el viento empezaba a agitar con violencia los รกrboles. Max no habรญa vuelto y tuvieron que esperar que la tormenta y la Lluvia.
No tardรณ en darse cuenta de que Max estaba muerto y se arrojรณ sollozando sobre su cadรกver. Lucien se ahogaba y Noรฉ no podรญa pronunciar mรกs que sonidos entrecortados. Cerraron el ataรบd y lo cubrieron con una tela negra que tenรญa una estrella de David en el centro, y lo velaron en el comedor de la casa. Lucien estuvo aferrado al cajรณn, mudo, sin poder llorar, hasta que Vera, la mujer de Noรฉ, lo tomรณ de la mano y lo sacรณ de allรญ. Los colonos, vestidos de luto riguroso, permanecรญan agrupados en la puerta de la casa de los Finz, con las caras rudas, llenas de estupor, hablando de รฉl como si viviera. Una mujer robusta y vieja irrumpiรณ en el velorio y se abriรณ paso entre la gente. Dijo que habรญa sido maestra de sexto grado del muchacho. Cuando ella vio el ataรบd, un leve gemido saliรณ de su garganta, mirรณ a un colono que estaba a su lado y le dijo que Max era un niรฑo rรกpido para los nรบmeros y enseguida se fue. Lo enterraron en el cementerio de la colonia, segรบn la Ley de Moisรฉs. Vasili rezรณ con fervor frente a la tumba del hijoy nombrรณ a su padre, la voz apesadumbrada.
Lucien se quedรณ mirando los cipreses: la sombra de sus ramas temblaba en el suelo. Vio una isoca que salรญa de una tumba y pensรณ que tambiรฉn en ese lugar los gusanos se hacรญan amos de los muertos.
(ยฉ Perla Suez, en El arresto, Editorial Norma, Colecciรณn La Otra Orilla, Buenos Aires, 2001)
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“In the Rice Cooker”
“Hiding things is what makes them rot…”
John Dos Passos
Vasili and Ana Finz arrived in Villa Clara with the immigrants brought by Baron Hirsch at the end of the last century. Finz began working the land as a rice paddy water carrier and learned the trade of a rice farmer. When Lucien was born, Ana died of eclampsia during the postpartum period. Finz rented seven hectares with an adobe house and a shed. A wet nurse breastfed the boy until he was one year old, and after that, Finz’s other children took care of him. The boy grew up in the rice farm, with the security given to him by his father and especially Max, his older brother. When Lucien couldn’t sleep, Max would talk to him about the thistles that were blooming purple at that hour, about the banks where they grew rice, about the breams in the stream, and he would hum, nodding his head, to the Cossack’s song: “Ayaya, yaya, yayaya…”
Lucien would look at the moonless sky and think that his mother was in that darkness. Max would also tell him the story of the emperor who walked around naked, believing he was wearing a rich suit, and a deep calm would come over the boy, and he would fall asleep. With the work on the land, Lucien’s arms grew powerful. “Lucien, you have to turn the earth breadover until it’s fluffy,” his father would tell him. The Finzes would shelter from the sun under the shade of a eucalyptus tree and eat something light, lying on the grass. They would barely sleep before they continued working. As the sun set, they ate heartily, drank only a glass of wine, and talked about some trivial matter. Afterward, they went to rest. Lucien preferred to walk for a while, before sleep overcame him. In the summer, Vasili’s energetic voice could be heard calling his children and warning them: The military lizard is coming. Find Gonzalez, and he will cure the lizard with words. Soon the rice was ripening, and the boy’s cries could be heard calling his father and brothers to see the blossoming. “Noah, Max, come see the ears of grain!”
When the harvest was good, rice farmers from the neighboring settlements would gather around the Finz house. A troop of musicians with piano accordions and kettledrums would play the first strains of the Cossack dance. Max would be the first to stand in the middle of the circle of boys, bare-chested, arms wide open, leap violently, and begin the squatting dance, striking the ground with his horseshoe boots. Then he would spin in the air, land on his haunches again, and continue dancing with grace and ease. Respectable old men, Russian Jews, would join in the Cossack dance, and with powerful steps, as if carried away by a unique pleasure, they would sing, “Yaya yayaya…” Lucien watched it all, his head full of noise. It had been raining for a week, and the roads were flooded, and the Bad Creek was overflowing; not even the horses could cross to the other bank. Lucien walked hand in hand with his father: he was no more than eleven years old. “Listen to the pampero, Lucien,” you said, your head bowed, wanting me to hear the preliminary sound of the wind. Vasili had his eyes fixed on the rice field. “Is it going to clear, Father?” I asked him. You told me it was going to clear. The rice field was a swamp. The water reached our knees. A rotten piece of wood and a coiled rattlesnake crossed before my eyes; a dead rat and a storm cloud floated in the water that continued its furious push over the banks. Vasili, you said you spent all night watching the falling rain and said you had risen from the ruin more than once. But there were many things you didn’t say…” Just as the military lizard finished the grain in a few hours; just as the rain rotted everything, so too did the Finzes; they were not people to give up. Get everything ready, because tomorrow we’re leaving. But where? Max asked. To rent the field they offered me in Carlos Casares. We’ll try planting wheat. Carlos Casares is flooded too, Noรฉ said. You don’t want to sacrifice yourself, Vasili said, his voice hoarse, his gaze fixed on Noรฉ. Lucien remembered that his father’s word was sacred. “I see you again, Father, absorbed, sheltered in silence, walking slowly along the edge of the canal. The harvest is lost, you say. The sun has set, the rice field is muddy, it smells of vomit. There’s no wind. The afternoon falls peacefully. I hear the squawk of an earwig crossing the air and there are electric-blue horseflies buzzing everywhere. I see the blackness of the sky in the distance, I hear the dogs crying, and you, Father, muttering, and what can I do… For more than three hours we walked around the flooded rice field. How’s the water level on the dipstick? you asked Max. “Shit, it keeps rising…!” he said. “Don’t talk like that, you’re losing your decency!” he said. Max shouted at him, “Do you think I’m still that child you forced to lie in the sun on a hot zinc sheet because he refused to obey you? Humiliating yourself and suffering, that’s the only thing that he likes! Enough! Tell me my efforts weren’t in vain…, said Vasili. And he walked away from the rice paddy. The cry of an owl disturbed the waning afternoon. I looked up at the sky and was afraid. I saw it all red, all blood. “Let’s go rest and we’ll come back as soon as the water goes down,” said Noah. “Where’s Lucien?” asked Max. But I, being a child who had heard everything, walked away without saying anything. I only turned my head when I felt Max’s arms wrap around me. “Hey, Lucien, take a deep breath and suck the wind in and climb onto my shoulders, I’ll carry you in slippers!” And I climbed onto his shoulders, and we trotted home. “Look, Lucien, the Messiah is coming over there bringing peace and justice,” you said. And I, being a God-fearing child, thought I saw him arriving, riding on his white chestnut horse. His thin face and long beard disappeared as soon as I opened my eyes: “I was sleepless, Father.” Lucien was walking through the rice field when he heard someone singing a ballad in his grandparents’ dialect and felt it as a threat: “…I’m going on a sleigh ride, / across the snowy steppe, / the wolves are on my heels…” The earth rumbled in his ears. He heard a dull rumble. He quickened his pace. The storm was sure to wreak havoc on the stallion. When he reached his house, he heard the wind begin to violently shake the trees. Max hadn’t returned, and they had to wait for the storm and the Rain.
It didn’t take long for him to realize that Max was dead and he threw himself sobbing over his body. Lucien was choking, and Noah could only utter broken sounds. They closed the coffin and covered it with a black cloth with a Star of David in the center, and they held a wake in the dining room. from the house. Lucien clung to the coffin, mute, unable to cry, until Vera, Noรฉ’s wife, took him by the hand and pulled him out. The colonists, dressed in strict mourning, remained grouped at the door of the Finz house, their faces grim and full of astonishment. A robust, elderly woman burst into the wake and pushed her way through the crowd. She said she had been the boy’s sixth-grade teacher. When she saw the coffin, a soft moan escaped her throat. She looked at a settler at her side and told him that Max was a child with quick numbers, then left immediately. He was buried in the colony cemetery, according to the Law of Moses. Vasili prayed fervently in front of his son’s grave and named his own father, his voice heavy with sorrow.
Lucien stared at the cypress trees: the shadow of their branches trembled on the ground. He saw an isochka emerging from a grave and thought that in that place, too, worms took over the dead.
Paulina Vinderman es poeta y traductora y vive en Buenos Aires. Ha publicado mรกs de quince libros de poesรญa, entre los que encuentran: Hospital de veteranos (2006), Bote Negro ( 2010 ; Vaso Roto, 2010) ,La epigrafista (2012), Ciruelo (2014) y Tocar el cielo oscuro, Obra reunida (2016 ) Obtuvo entre otros, el Primer Premio Municipal Ciudad de Buenos Aires (bienio 2002-2003), el Premio Nacional Regional de la Secretarรญa de Cultura de la Naciรณn (cuatrienio 93-96), los Premios Fondo Nacional de las Artes 2002 y 2005, Premio Citta di Cremona, Italia, 2006, al conjunto de su obra; Premio de la Academia Argentina de Letras, 2004-2006, a su trayectoria y a su libro “Hospital de veteranos”.; Gran Premio de Honor de la Fundaciรณn Argentina para la Poesรญa (2011), Premio Esteban Echeverrรญa a trayectoria ,Gente de Letras, 2012 y Premio Alfonsina Storni 2019. Ha sido incluรญda en numerosas antologรญas y traducida parcialmente al inglรฉs, al italiano, al alemรกn, al francรฉs, portuguรฉs, rumano, catalรกn y turco. Ha traducido entre otros poetas, a Emily Dickinson, Michael Ondaatje, Sylvia Plath, James Merrill.
___________________________
Paulina Vinderman is a poet and translator living in Buenos Aires. She has published more than fifteen books of poetry, including: Hospital de Veteranos (2006), Bote Negro (2010; Vaso Roto, 2010), La epigrafista (2012), Ciruelo (2014), and Tocar el cielo oscuro, Obra reunida (2016). She has won, among others, the First Prize of the City of Buenos Aires (2002-2003), the National Regional Prize of the Secretariat of Culture of the Nation (four-year period 93-96), the National Fund for the Arts Awards 2002 and 2005, the Citta di Cremona Prize, Italy, 2006, for her body of work; the Argentine Academy of Letters Prize, 2004-2006, for her career and for her book “Hospital de Veteranos.” Grand Prize of Honor from the Argentine Foundation for Poetry (2011), Esteban Echeverrรญa Award for lifetime achievement, Gente de Letras, 2012 and Alfonsina Storni Award 2019. She has been included in numerous anthologies and partially translated into English, Italian, German, French, Portuguese, Romanian, Catalan and Turkish. She has translated, among other poets, Emily Dickinson, Michael Ondaatje, Sylvia Plath, James Merrill.
Y si hubiera nacido hombre habrรญa sido marinero con una azul mortaja como lecho.
Madre, no me dijiste nunca que habรญa que pagar un precio para hablar con las flores. Detrรกs de tantas ventanas las mujeres se peinan para recibirlos. No me enseรฑaste nunca que habรญa que pagar un precio por haber nacido mujer y marinera.
Mi amor a punto de morir no sabe que amo รบnicamente ahora que no hay vientre ni ola ni deseo.
Mi amor a punto de morir no sabe que รบnicamente lo amo porque muere y quedo libre de todo excepto de escribirlo eligiendo los momentos del goce como un conquistador antes del oro
Mi amor no sabe que el รบnico al que amรฉ fue aquel marino de la fotografรญa que jamรกs conocรญ.
Porque me enamoraba รบnicamente de los derrotados. Porque habrรก naufragado con una azul mortaja como lecho.
Porque sus ojos eran huรฉrfanos como los mรญos, sucios de tormentas y remedios solitarios contra el amor, la blandura, la nostalgia de tierra.
If I Had Been Born a Man
Madre, no me enseรฑaste nunca a ordenar mis pedazos Me dejaste cortarme, cortarme, con cuchillos de mar y de ventanas. ยซLas mujeres se peinan, decรญas, para recibirlos.ยป
_______________________
And If I Had Been Born A Manโฆ
And if I had been born a man
I would have been a seaman
with a blue shroud for a bed.
Mother, you never told
that I had to pay a price
to speak with the flowers.
Behind so many windows
the women do their hair to receive them.
You never taught me
that I would have to pay a price
for having been born a woman
and a seaman
My love doesnโt know
that the only one that I loved
was that mariner in the photo
who I never knew.
Because he loved me only
from among the defeated.
Because he will have shipwrecked
With a blue shroud as a bed.
Because his eyes were orphans
like mine,
dirtied by the storms and solitary remedies
against love, the weakness,
the nostalgia of the earth.
Mother, you never taught me
to out my pieces in order.
You let me cut myself, cut myself,
with knives of sea and of windows
โThe women do their hair, you used to say,
To receive them.โ
De “La balada de Cordelia” 1984
___________
La equilibrista
La equilibrista mueve su sombrilla
y su pie aletea sabiamente hacia delante
y hacia atrรกs, hocico de luna dentro de su/ zapatilla
con lentejuelas.
Nadie sabe en las gradas
de sus ojos ahumados porque su amor ha muerto.
Y ella piensa, mientras los tambores suenan
lejanos desde el foso,
a quรฉ regiones de trampa puede llevar
el dolor,
cuando la misma ceremonia de homenaje
ha de cumplirse
tanto si adelanta el pie sobre la cuerda
porque la vida espera
o si se deja caer, burbuja de color,
con la sombrilla cerrada como paracaรญdas inรบtil,
a un oscuro suelo, a su compasiรณn.
_________________________
Otra vez mi ropa cuelga de un clavo en la pared
y la precariedad se vuelve voluptuosa.
Los pescadores se han dormido
y salgo a mirar el mar.
Una cinta de acero.
Mi mar ยฟse acordarรก de mรญ?
El azul medianoche, el de Caleta Olivia
y su playa sin nadie, donde encontrรฉ
mi estrella morada.
Tal vez yo necesito que perduren mis fantasmas.
Once more my clothing hands on a nail on the wall
and the precarity becomes voluptuous.
The fishermen have fallen asleep
and I go out to look at the sea.
A belt of iron.
Does the sea remember me?
The midnight blue, that of Caleta Olivia
and its beach without anyone, where I will find
my purple star.
Perhaps I need my fantasies to persist.
___________________________
2)
Nunca estuve tan cerca de mรญ.
Percibo la espalda del amor
y el dibujo รกspero de lo ilusorio.
Mi vida entera ahora es irreal, un sueรฑo
de manos y oboes compartidos.
โNo me quites la memoria, รกngel oscuroโ*
La claridad se fundiรณ en mi taza y fabricรณ
una cabaรฑa donde dormir.
No me quites mi luna, mi madre, mi farola,
las pequeรฑas rocas, el Mar de la Tranquilidad.
*Celia Gourinski
I was never so close to myself.
I perceive loveโs back
and the rough drawing of the illusory.
My entire live is now unreal, a dream
of hands and shared oboes.
โDonโt take the memory from me, dark angelโ *
Clarity mixed into my cup and built
a cabana I which to sleep.
Donโt take my moon, my mother, my streetlight.
The small rocks, the Sea of Tranquility.
*Celia Gourinski
5)
El amor ahora es sรณlo un dolor de ciรฉnaga,
aroma de frutos que se pudren.
En el cielo color violeta olvido las mentiras,
la traiciรณn de la muerte, las cajas abarrotadas
de cartas y fotos sonrientes.
Mi cafetera perdiรณ su brillo y mi taza se cuarteรณ
pero a Imaginaciรณn, mi cabra adoptada
le bastan su maรญz y mis palabras.
The love is now only a pain coming from the swamp,
aroma of fruits that rot.
In the violet color sky you forget the lies,
the treason of death, the cram-paced boxes
of smiling letters and photos.
My coffee pot lost its shine, and my cup cracked
but the imagination, my adopted goat
Is satisfied with its corn and my words.
__________________________
8)
No lo llames exilio, esto no es un exilio.
En el mundo de gaviotas, ellas me miran
como a un ave perdido mรกs.
Sentada en la arena frente al dรญa que agoniza
preparo una ceremonia del tรฉ.
El cielo es de durazno y un poco de metal.
Mi alfabeto se redujo y no quiero otra vida.
Es รฉsta mi otra vida.
Tiene color de medianoche y las vรฉrtebras
rotas.
Donโt call it exile; this is not an exile.
In the world of seagulls, they look at me
like one more lost bird.
Seated in the sand facing the dying day
I prepare a tea ceremony.
The sky is of peach and a little of metal.
Mi alphabet is reduced, and I donโt want another/ life,
This is my other life.
It has the color of midnight and the broken vertebrae.
______________________________
13)
Tu carta pregunta demasiado.
No, no he cambiado mucho, se acentuaron
mi vieja mudez y mi cautela.
Curo mi herida con el agua de mar
Y sueรฑo con un camino entre dramรกticos olivos
(un camino dramรกtico entre olivos).
Ya no busco seรฑales y mi tristeza es cada vez
mรกs dulce y mi locura incierta.
Y cuando escribo, lo hago con un amor
por el mundo tan grande y terrible
como la muerte.
__________________________
Your letter questions too much.
No, I havenโt changed much, my old muteness
and my caution became accentuated.
I cure my wound with sea water
and I dream of a road among dramatic olive trees
(a dramatic road through olive trees.)
I no longer look for signs and my sadness is increasingly sweeter and my madness unsure.
And when I write, I do it with a love
for the world so great and terrible
as death.
__________________
Tan antiguo esto de robar un sueรฑo…
Tan antiguo esto de robar un sueรฑo a alguien que pasa. El mismo sueรฑo que rueda por entre las mesas de esta fiesta abandonada. De esta ciudad vacรญa de celebraciones verdaderas. Nadie posee nada en esta calle. Las cosas se acumulan en cajas, en nรบmeros, en miedos vigilantes que se suman como otra cosa mรกs a las palabras impuestas. Lo รบnico que existe, es este sueรฑo oscuro e imperioso de otra ciudad. Donde no sea necesario robar un sueรฑo a alguien que pasa.
De “La otra ciudad” 1980
___________________________
Itโs So Ancient All This About Stealing a Dream
Itโs so ancient all this about stealing a dream
from someone who passes by.
The same dream that rolls among the
tables
of this abandoned party.
of this city empty of true
celebrations
Nobody owns anything in this street,
the things accumulate
in boxes, in numbers,
in vigilant fears
that add up like one more thing
on the imposed words.
The anything that exists,
In this dark and imperious dream
of another city.
Where it may not be necessary
to streal a dream from anyone.
Transparencias
Escrรญbanme. Resuelvo en medio de la crisis volverme carta: papeles que atraviesen los ocรฉanos como frรกgiles balsas (para dar importancia a las tormentas) Anoche lloviรณ. Los senderos se embarraron, atrapรฉ una luciรฉrnaga equivocada -y esquiva- y despuรฉs leรญ poemas isabelinos hasta que amaneciรณ (Un cierto orden es el que sostiene la soledad y los abrazos) Hoy tomรฉ cerveza con un hombre cansado -de ojos endiabladamente hermosos- y enmudecimos frente a un pueblo fantasmagรณrico levantado sobre nosotros como una pintura surreal.
Todos los dรญas voy hasta el rรญo despuรฉs del cafรฉ. Todos los dรญas desisto de mirarme en el agua barrosa. En realidad, ya ninguna trasparencia es posible, como si la vida se ocultara a sรญ misma en el penacho de los cocoteros. Como si la vida fuera todo y nada, orgullosa de sus fosforescencias hasta en las palabras, que finalmente nada dicen, nada reclaman sino el mรญnimo lugar en un universo de ruido de sartenes amores suntuosos olas que arrasan las orillas y cรณdigos infinitos para desenterrar tesoros (casi siempre con palas prestadas y al amanecer.)
De “Rojo Junio” 1998
____________________________
Transparences
Write to me, all of you.
I resolve in the middle of the crisis
to become a letter,
papers that cross the oceans
like fragile balsa rafts
(to give importance to the storms)
Last night it rained,
the paths became muddy,
I trapped a lightening bug mistaken
-and evasive-
and later, I read poems isabelline poems
until it was dawn
(A certain order is that which sustains
solitude
And the hugging)
Today I had a beer with a tired man
–with devilishly beautiful eyesโ
and we said nothing
before a phantasmagoric town buuilt over us like a/
surreal painting.
Every day I go as far as the river
beyond the cafรฉ. Every day I desist
from looking at myself in the muddy water.
In reality, no transparence is longer
possible.
As if life hides itself
in the plumes of the coconut palms.
As if life were everything and nowhere, proud of its phosphorescence
until in words, that finally say
nothing,
Reclaim nothing
only the minimum place in the universe,
noisy frying pans
sumptuous loves
waves that devastate the shores
and infinite codes for digging up treasures
(almost always with borrowed shovels
And at dawn.)
_________________________________
Vivir para contarlo III
Agua dulce es el nombre del cafรฉ y el nombre que me susurraba mi primer amante. Yo no era dulce, la furia asomaba en el verano a lo largo de una partida de ajedrez que iba a durar hasta que los รกrboles dijeran basta. Todavรญa es verano, los รกrboles no dicen basta y la luz sobre el puente marca aquella frรกgil furia convertida en fronteras, esquirlas de poemas, tesoros que ya no tienen caja de guardar. ยฟQuรฉ es escribir sino modificar la respiraciรณn de las ciudades? Camino hacia el cafรฉ de la mano de un marinero ruso que reciรฉn bajรณ de su barco hacia la ginebra oscilando sobre un caminito bordeado de narcisos. En su inglรฉs primitivo puede contarme poco. Me extiende varias fotos entre los vasos ardientes y miro (ยฟCuรกnto hace que estoy despierta y que miro, despierta todo el tiempo para mirar?) Una casa de suburbio, abandonada a un orgullo de sartรฉn, de felpudo, de cafetera lustrada. Con el alma vacรญa contemplo un perro negro y mรกs atrรกs, la cicatriz de la derrota en mi propia memoria que tambiรฉn se mira. Salgo de la foto a un umbral, a una noche cรกlida en una ciudad tan grande que no cree en sรญ misma, sรณlo late y en ella por azar nos reconocemos: la piedra oscura del hogar (no sale la mancha, no sale con la esponja y el esfuerzo del brazo y el vรฉrtigo de las estrellas mientras espiamos el idรฉntico gesto del padre y una bandera diferente) Insomnes, reuniremos de a poco nuestra obstinaciรณn. ยฟQuรฉ fue primero, la orfandad o la herida? Por ahora es el viento el escritor absoluto, el dueรฑo de todas las historias.
De Bulgaria” 1998
______________________________
To Live to Tell It
III
Fresh Waterโ is the name of the cafรฉ.
And the name that my first lover whispered to me.
I wasnโt fresh, fury appeared in summer
During a chess game
that wasnโt going to last until the trees said โenough.โ
Itโs still summer. The trees still donโt say โenough.โ
And the light above the door
sof poems,
Treasures that donโt yet have boxes to keep.
What is writing if not the modifying the breathing
of cities?
I walk toward the cafรฉ in hand of a Russian sailor
who recently came off his ship to gin
swinging over a path bordered by narcissuses.
He can tell me a little in his primitive English.
He shows me some photos between the burning glasses.
(How long have I been awake and that I look,
awake all the time to look?)
A slum house, abandoned to the pride of
a frying pan, doormat, a shined coffeepot.
With an empty soul, I contemplate a black dog.
And further back, the scar of loss
in my own memory
that also looks at itself.
I go out of the photo at a doorstep
To a hot night in a city so big
that it doesnโt believe in itself, it only beats and in it
by chance we recognize each other: the dark stone of the home
(the stain doesnโt come out, it doesnโt come out with the /sponge and
the elbow grease and the vertigo of the stars,
while we spy the identical gesture of a father
and a different flag)
Sleepless, we will meet our obstinacy little by little.
What was the first, the orphanhood or the wound?
For now, the wind is the absolute writer,
the owner of all the stories.
______________________________
El centro del mundo
No estoy en el centro del mundo,
apenas una ciudad
de provincia
que respira a sus anchas bajo mi ventana.
Hay un viento caliente
y una estatua que se cree dorada por las tardes
y un vendedor de almohadas que me cambia sus relatos
por un cigarrillo.
Quรฉ puede importar la sordidez del bolero o
el soneto a la baya del cafรฉ.
Esta soledad crea chispas a su alrededor,
es orgullosa, irrepetible, diabรณlica, no se refleja en el espejo,
pero fabrica un reino de este borde astillado.
La maรฑana parece tan irisada y absurda como las cortinas del vestรญbulo.
ยซTengo otra historia, es de un mudo y un รกngel,
su mercรฉ, vale por dosยป.
________________________________
The Center of the World
Iโm not in the center of the world,
hardly a provincial
city
That breathes its wideness below my window.
There is a hot wind
and a statue que you believe is golden in the afternoons
and its pillow salesman who changes his stories for me
Liliana Heker, nacida en Buenos Aires en 1943, es cuentista, novelista y ensayista. Estudiรณ Fรญsica en la Universidad de Buenos Aires, pero, desde muy temprana edad, eligiรณ la literatura. A los 16 aรฑos se identificรณ con las actitudes literarias y la posiciรณn ideolรณgica de la revista literaria El Grillo de Papel. En El Grillo de Papel publicรณ sus primeros cuentos. En 1961, luego de que la revista fuera prohibida por un decreto estatal junto con otras publicaciones de izquierda, fundรณ con Abelardo Castillo, la revista literaria El Escarabajo de Oro (1961 โ 1974). En 1977, con Abelardo Castillo y Sylvia Iparraguirre, fundรณ la revista El Ornitorrinco (1977 โ 1986), que codirigiรณ. En estas revistas publicรณ artรญculos, ensayos, reseรฑas y polรฉmicas contra la Dictadura. Su primer libro de cuentos Los que vio la zarza obtuvo la Primera Menciรณn en el Concurso Hispanoamericano de Literatura en 1966. Posteriormente publicรณ Acuario (cuentos, 1972), Un brillo que se apagรณ en el mundo (trรญptico de cuentos, 1977), Las peras del mal (cuentos, 1982), Zona de Clivaje (novela, 1987 โ Primer Premio Municipal de Novela), Los fronteras de lo real (1991, que reรบne sus tres primeros libros de cuentos, y obtuvo el Segundo Premio Municipal de Cuento, El fin de la historia (novela, 1996) y La muerte de Dios (cuentos, 2001). En 2016 se publicรณ Cuentos Reunidos, que combina sus cuentos publicados y algunos inรฉditos. Las traducciones de sus cuentos al inglรฉs, alemรกn, francรฉs, ruso, turco, serbio, holandรฉs y farsi estรกn incluidas en varias antologรญas. Su novela El fin de la historia fue traducida al inglรฉs por Andrea Labinger y publicado por Editorial Biblioasis (Canadรก, 2012). La Universidad de Yale publicรณ una amplia selecciรณn de sus cuentos, traducidos al inglรฉs por Alberto Manguel y Miranda France: Please Talk to Me (Yale University Press, 2015). En 2008, una selecciรณn de sus cuentos traducidos al hebreo se publicรณ en Israel.
___________________________________
Liliana Heker, born in Buenos Aires in 1943, is a short story writer, novelist and essayist. She studied Physics at the University of Buenos Aires, but from a very early age she chose literature. At the age of 16 she identified with the literary attitudes and ideological position of the literary magazine El Grillo de Papel. In El Grillo de Papel she published her first stories. In 1961, after the magazine was banned by a state decree along with other leftist publications, she founded with Abelardo Castillo the literary magazine El Escarabajo de Oro (1961 โ 1974). In 1977, with Abelardo Castillo and Sylvia Iparraguirre, she founded the magazine El Ornitorrinco (1977 โ 1986), which she co-directed. In these magazines she published articles, essays, reviews and polemics against the Dictatorship. Her first book of short stories, Los que vio la zarza, was awarded First Mention in the Hispano-American Literature Competition in 1966. She later published Acuario (short stories, 1972), Un brillo que se apagรณ en el mundo (triptych of short stories, 1977), Las peras del mal (short stories, 1982), Zona de Clivaje (novel, 1987 โ First Municipal Novel Prize), Los fronteras de lo real (1991, which brings together her first three books of short stories, and won the Second Municipal Novel Prize), El fin de la historia (novel, 1996) and La muerte de Dios (short stories, 2001). In 2016, Cuentos Reunidos was published, which combines his published stories and some unpublished ones. The translations of his stories into English, German, French, Russian, Turkish, Serbian, Dutch and Farsi are included in several anthologies. Her novel El fin de la historia was translated into English by Andrea Labinger and published by Biblioasis Publishing (Canada, 2012). A large selection of her stories, translated into English by Alberto Manguel and Miranda France, was published by Yale University: Please Talk to Me (Yale University Press, 2015). In 2008, a selection of her stories translated into Hebrew was published in Israel.
___________________________________
___________________________________
History of God I I
ย ย ย ย ย ย Vivir con Dios es otra cosa. Sigue sin dormir pensando que Lucรญa se vuelve loca y la mata con un cuchillo, que su papรก y su mamรก se mueren en un accidente, que un leรณn la estรก esperando detrรกs de la mesa del comedor. Y en las madrugadas todavรญa se despierta ahogada de terror por las cosas que tendrรญa que haber hecho y no hizo, pero cuando de verdad desea algo que de no ocurrir la harรญa desdichada se lo pide a Dios y sabe que, de una manera o de otra, รฉl se las va a arreglar para que ella lo consiga. Todas las noches le reza. Desde su cama, en la oscuridad, cuando todos en la casa estรกn acostados, sin emitir el menor sonido para que Lucรญa no la descubra, junta palma contra palma sobre el pecho y comienza una oraciรณn que siempre empieza: Diosecito de mi vida. Los pedidos son de รญndole diversa y, en general, de resoluciรณn factible y cumplimiento no inmediato; no le gustarรญa ponerlo a Dios en apuros. Poco a poco, la oraciรณn va adquiriendo una forma: una especie de molde que admite mรบltiples variables. Hay pedidos que se emiten por รบnica vez; otros, de largo alcance, se repiten muchas noches seguidas; tambiรฉn hay parlamentos puramente conversacionales (va comprobando que Dios la entiende mejor que nadie, que aun ciertas debilidades y contradicciones suyas que le resultarรญa difรญcil explicar a otros, son rรกpidamente aceptadas por Dios: รฉl conoce las motivaciones de todo, razรณn por la cual suele no coincidir con lo que dice la gente acerca de lo que estรก bien y lo que estรก mal: para Mariana, que siempre estรก a contramano de lo que recomiendan las maestras y los libros de lectura, es un verdadero desahogo hablar con รฉl). Para el final de la oraciรณn, igual que para el comienzo, hay una fรณrmula รบnica: un beso en la punta de los dedos que luego es enviado hacia el cielo. No es que lo ubique a Dios allรญ o en lugar alguno. Las alusiones al Paraรญso, por ejemplo, le resultan tan poco creรญbles como los cuentos de hadas. Pero la altura le parece un buen รกmbito de observaciรณn para alguien capaz de saber quรฉ le estรก pasando a la gente. No cree que รฉl sepa ni le interese saber enย todoย momento lo que le sucede aย todaย la gente. Atiende en cada circunstancia lo que debe ser atendido. A ella la atiende siempre: le gusta su manera de ser: que le hable a รฉl deย vosย y que no crea que hay que comportarse como las niรฑas juiciosas de los libros de lectura. ย ย ย ย ย ย Por todos estos motivos su vรญnculo con Dios es secreto e incomunicable. ยฟCรณmo podrรญa explicarles a sus compaรฑeras que se santiguan ante cada situaciรณn de peligro y rezan elย Padre nuestroย y van a confesarse cuando creen que obraron mal de palabra o de hecho, que a Dios lo aburren muchรญsimo los formulismos y que jamรกs les prestรณ atenciรณn a las estupideces que ellas llaman pecados? Con ella sรญ se divierte: le gusta su manera de ser. El diรกlogo entre los dos es frecuente y sabroso. Ella le sigue pidiendo cosas y รฉl, a su manera, le cumple en todo. Poco a poco va introduciรฉndose en el vรญnculo la posibilidad de los castigos y el sistema se hace cada vez mรกs complejo. Para entenderlo de algรบn modo hay que diferenciar los desafรญos de las promesas. Los desafรญos no requieren la intervenciรณn directa de Dios; estรก implรญcito que รฉl algo debe controlar โsi no, ยฟquiรฉn?โ pero ella no le pide nada a cambio; el cumplimiento en sรญ mismo de la prueba y el haberse librado asรญ del castigo son el premio. Por ejemplo: ella dice que tiene que pisar nada mรกs que baldosas coloradas en una calle en que casi todas las baldosas son azules y hay sรณlo un camino en zigzag, con interrupciones, de coloradas. Si pisa una baldosa que no sea colorada, le van a ocurrir tres desgracias antes de fin de mes. Ella camina con el corazรณn pendiendo de un hilo hasta que, por fin, llega a una vereda de baldosas amarillas y queda a salvo. O se acerca a un perro que le da miedo y le acaricia la cabeza. O cuenta hasta treinta con la cabeza adentro del agua. La amenaza de algo terrible se cierne siempre sobre el incumplimiento. Se trata entonces, en cierta manera, de cumplir o morir. Hay un desafรญo muy especial cuando ella tiene doce aรฑos. Lo que tiene de especial es que lo ha podido anunciar con bombos y platillos sin que su padre o su madre se lo pudieran impedir. Lo que ella se ha propuesto y les ha dicho que va a hacer es ayunar el Dรญa del Perdรณn. ยฟQuiรฉn le puede prohibir algo asรญ? Sus tรญas ayunan, su abuelo tambiรฉn, y su abuela ayunaba antes de morir. En su casa no ayuna nadie pero su mamรก misma ha dicho que los que ayunan son muy judรญos. ยฟAlguien se animarรญa a pedirle a ella que no sea muy judรญa? En realidad, ser muy judรญa o poco judรญa le da exactamente lo mismo. Todo precepto religioso le parece una perfecta idiotez โha crecidoโ y lo รบnico que quiere es demostrarse a sรญ misma que es capaz de no probar siquiera una gota de agua durante veinticuatro horas. Resulta una experiencia fuerte: el ayuno debe ser absoluto, como su mamรก le ha dicho que ayunan los muy judรญos, asรญ que debe tener mucho cuidado incluso cuando se lava los dientes para no tragar siquiera una milรฉsima de gotita de agua. ยฟY ese gusto que siente en la boca? ยฟNo serรก que involuntariamente ha tragado un micrรณn de gotita? Claro que no, quรฉ estรบpida, si las papilas gustativas estรกn en la lengua. Pero, entonces, ยฟpor quรฉ despuรฉs de un rato el sabor desaparece? ยฟSerรก una propiedad de lo saboreable desaparecer despuรฉs de un rato o es que ella ha tragado algo de dentรญfrico y el sabor se le fue por la garganta? ยฟY la saliva? ยฟEstรก permitido tragarse la saliva? Sรญ, mientras uno no realice el acto voluntario de tragar. Pero apenas llega a esta conclusiรณn le vienen esas ganas insoportables de tragar que la vuelven loca: trata de pensar en otra cosa pero no puede. Contra el desaliento, irrumpe la idea de que la dificultad y esta lucha consigo misma son parte de su hazaรฑa. Cuando aparece la primera estrella el triunfo es total. ย ย ย ย ย ย Las promesas, en cambio, son hechas directamente a Dios y siempre estรกn asociadas a un objetivo concreto, en general al pedido de algo cuyo cumplimiento resulta imperioso โlos pedidos corrientes se realizan de manera directa, provocan un alivio inmediato con sรณlo haber sido formulados, y no requieren promesa algunaโ. Ella trata de que la tarea o hazaรฑa a cumplir tenga consecuencias beneficiosas; es habitual que lo prometido consista en algo que ella tendrรญa que hacer pero que su naturaleza perezosa o su perversidad le impide llevar a cabo. La promesa tiene fuerza suficiente como para atravesar estas barreras; es asรญ que, ademรกs de garantizar la concesiรณn del pedido, trae el beneficio del cumplimiento mismo โel silicio no se hizo para ellaโ. En los รบltimos tiempos, varias promesas de orden alimenticio le han permitido llegar a ser tan delgada como siempre quiso. Hace poco se ha mirado en el espejo y, por primera vez, se ha gustado: otra cosa que le debe agradecer a Dios. A veces โmuy pocas vecesโ hace una promesa que no puede cumplir. Entonces, antes de que llegue el castigo de Dios, se castiga ella misma. Como una ofrenda, le promete a Dios algo todavรญa mรกs difรญcil que lo descartado o mรกs largo de cumplir. Y รฉl lo acepta. Las relaciones entre los dos son de total armonรญa. Ella ahora agradece el no haber recibido el menor atisbo de una educaciรณn religiosa. Esto le ha permitido conocer a Dios en su esencia, sin ataduras ni mandatos. รl siempre estรก cuando lo necesita. La escucha, la entiende y la cuida. Por difรญcil que sea a veces la vida, ella sabe que, bajo su manto protector, nada malo puede pasarle.
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God’s Story II
Living with God is something else. She still can’t sleep thinking that Lucia will go crazy and kill her with a knife, that her father and mother will die in an accident, that a lion is waiting for her behind the dining room table. And in the early mornings she still wakes up drowning in terror because of the things she should have done and didn’t do, but when she really wants something that would make her unhappy if it didn’t happen, she asks God for it and knows that, one way or another, he will manage to make it happen for her. Every night she prays to him. From her bed, in the dark, when everyone in the house is in bed, without making the slightest sound so that Lucia does not discover her, she puts her palms together on her chest and begins a prayer that always begins: Little God of my life. The requests are of various kinds and, in general, of feasible resolution and not immediate fulfillment; she would not like to put God in a difficult situation. Little by little, the prayer takes on a form: a kind of mold that admits multiple variables. There are requests that are issued only once; others, of far-reaching scope, are repeated many nights in a row; There are also purely conversational lines (she finds that God understands her better than anyone else, that even certain weaknesses and contradictions of hers that she would find difficult to explain to others are quickly accepted by God: he knows the motivations for everything, which is why he usually does not agree with what people say about what is right and what is wrong: for Mariana, who is always against what teachers and reading books recommend, it is a real relief to talk to him). For the end of the prayer, as for the beginning, there is a unique formula: a kiss on the tip of the fingers that is then sent up to heaven. It is not that she places God there or in any place. Allusions to Paradise, for example, seem as little credible to her as fairy tales. But she finds height a good observation area for someone capable of knowing what is happening to people. She does not believe that he knows or is interested in knowing at all times what is happening to all people. In every circumstance, he pays attention to what needs to be paid to. He always pays attention to her: he likes her way of being: that she speaks to him about you and that she doesn’t think that one has to behave like the sensible girls in the reading books. For all these reasons, her bond with God is secret and incommunicable. How could she explain to her companions that they cross themselves in every dangerous situation and pray the Our Father and go to confession when they think they have done wrong in word or deed, that God is bored to death by formalities and that he never paid attention to the stupid things they call sins? He does have fun with her: he likes her way of being. The dialogue between them is frequent and enjoyable. She keeps asking him for things and he, in his own way, fulfills everything. Little by little, the possibility of punishments is introduced into the relationship and the system becomes more and more complex. To understand it in some way, we must differentiate challenges from promises. Challenges do not require God’s direct intervention; it is implied that he must control something – if not, who? – but she does not ask him for anything in return; the fulfillment of the test itself and having thus escaped punishment are the reward. For example: she says that she has to step on nothing but red tiles on a street where almost all the tiles are blue and there is only one zigzag path, with interruptions, of red ones. If she steps on a tile that is not red, three misfortunes will happen to her before the end of the month. She walks with her heart hanging by a thread until, finally, she reaches a sidewalk of yellow tiles and is safe. Or she approaches a dog that frightens her and strokes its head. Or she counts to thirty with her head under water. The threat of something terrible always looms over failure. So it is, in a way, a question of doing or dying. There is a very special challenge when she is twelve years old. What is special about her is that she has been able to announce it with great fanfare without her father or mother being able to stop her. What she has decided and told them she is going to do is fast on the Day of Atonement. Who can forbid her to do that? Her aunts fast, her grandfather too, and her grandmother fasted before she died. No one in her house fasts, but her mother herself has said that those who fast are very Jewish. Would anyone dare ask her not to be very Jewish? In reality, being very Jewish or not very Jewish is exactly the same to her. Every religious precept seems to her to be completely idioticโshe has grown upโand all she wants is to prove to herself that she is capable of not touching even a drop of water for twenty-four hours. It is a powerful experience: the fast must be absolute, as her mother has told her that the Jews fast, so she must be very careful even when brushing her teeth not to swallow even a thousandth of a drop of water. And that taste she feels in her mouth? Could it be that she has involuntarily swallowed a micron of a drop? Of course not, how stupid, if the taste buds are on the tongue. But then, why does the taste disappear after a while? Is it a property of the taste to disappear after a while or has she swallowed some toothpaste and the taste went down her throat? And the saliva? Is it permissible to swallow saliva? Yes, as long as one does not perform the voluntary act of swallowing. But as soon as she reaches this conclusion she is hit by this unbearable desire to swallow that drives her crazy: she tries to think of something else but cannot. Against the discouragement, the idea breaks in that the difficulty and this struggle with herself are part of her feat. When the first star appears, the triumph is total. Promises, on the other hand, are made directly to God and are always associated with a specific objective, generally with a request for something whose fulfillment is imperative – ordinary requests are made directly, they cause immediate relief just by being formulated, and they do not require any promise. She tries to make the task or feat to be accomplished have beneficial consequences; it is usual for the promise to consist of something that she should do but that her lazy nature or her perversity prevents her from carrying out. The promise is strong enough to cross these barriers; thus, in addition to guaranteeing the granting of the request, it brings the benefit of the fulfillment itself – the silicone was not made for her. In recent times, various promises of food have allowed her to become as thin as she always wanted. She recently looked in the mirror and, for the first time, she liked herself: another thing she has to thank God for. Sometimes – very rarely – she makes a promise that she cannot keep. Then, before God’s punishment comes, she punishes herself. As an offering, she promises God something even more difficult than what she had discarded or that would take longer to fulfill. And he accepts it. The relationship between the two is completely harmonious. She is now grateful for not having received the slightest hint of a religious education. This has allowed her to know God in his essence, without ties or mandates. He is always there when she needs him. He listens to her, understands her and takes care of her. However difficult life may be at times, she knows that, under his protective mantle, nothing bad can happen to her.
Yaco Nowens naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1938. Estudiรณ en la Escuela Nacional de Bellas Artes Manuel Belgrano y en los talleres de Josรฉ Maltz y Mรฉndez Terrero hasta 1965. Trabajรณ como dibujante en Clarรญn. Teรณrico de arte y coeditor de la revista de artes plรกsticas รleo y Mรกrmol junto con Teresa Pociello. Sus primeras muestras fueron como dibujante, junto a Quino, Garaycochea y Landrรบ. En 1964 o 1965 lo empiezan a invitar y Renรฉ Morรณn, su maestro y guรญa, lo obligรณ a exponer y asรญ comenzรณ. Dictรณ conferencias nacionales e internacionales. Miembro de Sociรฉtรฉ des Auteurs dans les Arts Graphiques et Plastiques de Parรญs. En 1972 invitado por la OEA viajรณ a Estados Unidos. Expuso en la Argentina, Estados Unidos, Israel, Corea, Venezuela, Espaรฑa, Ecuador, Francia y Cuba. โSu obra de los aรฑos 1960 era netamente confesional, desde el expresionismo, Mรกs adelante, impresionado por los informalistas del Grupo del Paso de Espaรฑa, Pollock y Kooning, su obra se mantiene dentro de una abstracciรณn lรญrica que nos permite adivinar el gesto de la pincelada manteniendo el todo dentro de composiciones de gran equilibrio geomรฉtrico y afรญn a las primeras etapas del cubismo. De colores restallantes, y de lรญneas que se entrecruzan a veces, para aludir a una marcada y cierta figuraciรณn paisajรญsticaโ, (Rafael Squirru). Tambiรฉn bajo la direcciรณn del artista plรกstico Yaco Nowens, el periรณdico judรญo y militante Nueva Presencia se seguirรญa editando desde 1987 hasta 1993, aรฑo en que Di Presse quebrรณ definitivamente.
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Yaco Nowens was born in Buenos Aires in 1938. He studied at the Manuel Belgrano National School of Fine Arts and in the workshops of Josรฉ Maltz and Mรฉndez Terrero until 1965. He worked as a draftsman for Clarรญn. He was an art theorist and co-editor of the visual arts magazine รleo y Mรกrmol together with Teresa Pociello. His first exhibitions were as a draftsman, alongside Quino, Garaycochea and Landrรบ. In 1964 or 1965 he began to receive invitations and Renรฉ Morรณn, his teacher and guide, forced him to exhibit and that’s how he began. He gave national and international lectures. He is a member of the Sociรฉtรฉ des Auteurs dans les Arts Graphiques et Plastiques in Paris. In 1972, invited by the OAS, he traveled to the United States. He exhibited in Argentina, the United States, Israel, Korea, Venezuela, Spain, Ecuador, France and Cuba. โHis work from the 1960s was clearly confessional, from an expressionist perspective. Later, impressed by the informalists of the Grupo del Paso in Spain, Pollock and Kooning, his work remained within a lyrical abstraction that allows us to guess the gesture of the brushstroke, keeping the whole within compositions of great geometric balance and akin to the early stages of cubism. With bright colours and lines that sometimes intersect, to allude to a marked and certain landscape figurationโ, (Rafael Squirru). Also, under the direction of the visual artist Yaco Nowens, the Jewish and militant newspaper Nueva Presencia continued to be published from 1987 to 1993, the year in which Di Presse went bankrupt definitively.
Retrato de Yaco Nowens por el gran artista judรญo-argentino Gyula Kosice/A Portrait of Yako Nowens by the great Argentine Jewish artist Gyula Kosice
Robert Schopflocher naciรณ en una familia judรญa alemana asimilada. Despuรฉs de que los nazis tomaron el poder, fue excluido de asistir a la escuela primaria humanรญstica en Fรผrth y en su lugar asistiรณ a un internado judรญo. En abril de 1937, su familia huyรณ a Argentina. Allรญ, Schopflocher asistiรณ a la Escuela Pestalozzi fundada por August Siemsen. He publicado varios artรญculos en la revista del exilio La Otra Alemania editada por Siemsen. Sin embargo, por motivos econรณmicos no pudo iniciar una carrera como periodista o autor. Despuรฉs de completar sus estudios de agronomรญa, Schopflocher trabajรณ como administrador agrรญcola y comerciante de importaciones. Escribiรณ varios libros de texto y obras especializadas sobre temas agrรญcolas. A partir de la dรฉcada de 1980 tambiรฉn comenzรณ a escribir literatura: ensayos, crรญticas, cuentos y poemas, todos escritos inicialmente en espaรฑol. El autor tenรญa mรกs de setenta aรฑos cuando empezรณ a escribir en alemรกn. El impulso para esto provino de sus experiencias al traducir sus propios escritos al alemรกn. Al hacerlo, Schopflocher tuvo la impresiรณn de que estaba eliminando un “Schicht” (“capa”) y revelando el “in der Muttersprache abgelagerte[n] Urtext” (“texto original depositado en mi lengua materna”, ed. trad, cita basado en Dirk Niefanger/Gunnar Och, Robert Schopflocher, der Erzรคhler [El narrador], 2018) A partir de ese momento, escribiรณ sus historias y novelas en alemรกn. En ensayos y conferencias, se comprometiรณ con su bilingรผismo como escritor. Roberto Schopflocher fue miembro honorario del Centro PEN de Escritores de Habla Alemana en el Extranjero. En 2008 la ciudad de Fรผrth le otorgรณ el premio Jakob Wassermann.
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Robert Schopflocherย was born into an assimilated German-Jewish family. After the Nazis seized power, he was excluded from attending the humanistic grammar school inย Fรผrthย and instead attended a Jewish boarding school. In April 1937, his family fled to Argentina. There,ย Schopflocherย attended the Pestalozzi School founded byย August Siemsen. He published several articles in the exile magazineย La otra Alemaniaย edited byย Siemsen. Yet, due to economic reasons, he was unable to begin a career as a journalist or author.
After completing his studies in Agronomy, Schopflocher worked as an agricultural administrator and import merchant. He wrote several textbooks and specialist works on agricultural topics. From the 1980s onwards, he also began to write literature โ essays, criticism, stories and poems, all initially written in Spanish. The author was into his seventies before he began to write in German. The impetus for this came from his experiences of translating his own writings into German. By doing so, Schopflocher had the impression that he was removing a โSchichtโ (โlayerโ) and revealing the โin der Muttersprache abgelagerte[n] Urtextโ (โoriginal text deposited in my mother tongueโ, ed. trans, Quotation based on Dirk Niefanger/Gunnar Och, Robert Schopflocher, der Erzรคhler [The Story-Teller], 2018) From that point on, he wrote his stories and novels in German. In essays and lectures, he engaged with his bilingualism as a writer.
Roberto Schopflocher was an honorary member of the PEN Centre of German-Speaking Writers Abroad. In 2008, the city of Fรผrth awarded him the Jakob Wassermann Prize.
Reencuentros La historia de un perdedor
Lo reconocรญ de inmediato, por mรกs que alcancรฉ a verlo tan sรณlo de espaldas. Y eso que habรญan pasado varios aรฑos sin que nuestros caminos se cruzaran: prรกcticamente, desde que fracaso nuestro negocio, el รบnico que habรญamos emprendido juntos. Quizรก por lo nerviosas brusquedad de sus movimientos o por esas orejas salientes, motivos de tantas burlas de escuela, el hecho fue que lo supe de inmediato: no podรญa otro que Marcos Silberman, Marquitos para sus allegados. La cola de sol resignados ciudadanos avanzaba lentamente.
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Mรกs de una vez mamรก me lo habรญa advertido: el chico aquรฉl es un tiro al aire y, acรณrdate de mis palabras, va a terminar mal. Nunca me enterรฉ en quรฉ fundaba sus presagios, acompaรฑado por una mirada lanzada al cielo y un suspiro, de รฉsos que sรณlo ella sabรญa emitir.
Marquitos ero un hijo de nuestros vecinos, el mรกs grande de los tres. Un chico lleno de ideas fascinantes. Sentรญa una profunda admiraciรณn por quien era para mรญ como ese hermano mayor, que yo no tenรญa. Debo aclarar que ser vecino significaba mucho en nuestra colonia, casi tanto como ser pariente. A veces, mรกs.
A primera vista, nuestras casas se parecรญan. Las mismas galerรญas. Imp de sus costados cerrado por enredaderas de flores olorosas: olorosas: madreselvas, jazmines, glicinas. Las mismas cocinas con dos hornallas, alimentadas a marlos y carbรณn de leรฑa. Idรฉnticas casillas de retrete, a treinta pasos detrรกs, el fondo del patio, en cuyo entro algunos paraรญsos, aplacaban con su sombra el fuego de las siestas estivales; de noche, nuestras gallinas dormรญan en sus ramas. Cortinas de crochet delante de las pequeรฑas ventanas; en la pared, las fotos de viejos barbudos de bajo del vidrio bombรฉ en marco ovalado. Con el correr de los aรฑos descubrรญ las diferencias. En la casa de los Silberman habรญa mรกs libros que en la nuestra. Hileras de libros. En cambio, nosotros algunos adornos adicionales; un centro de mesa de vidrio prensado en forma de cisne; dos รณleos; paisajes suizos con montaรฑas nevadas, alegres cabaรฑas y algunos cervatillos. Desde luego, cada familia poseรญa su propia historia, su propio lenguaje secreto y hasta sus propios chistes. Ahรญ se notaban las mayores diferencias entre los Silberman y nosotros, los Burdanek.
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Poco antes de tocarle el turno, Marcos se dio vuelta y me descubriรณ: ยกQuรฉ casualidad! Lo era de verdad, pues tragarme colas no formaba parte de mis costumbres. Mi tiempo vale oro. Me abrazรณ. Efusivamente, dirรญa yo. Quรฉ es tu vida, quise saber. Y entonces, en lugar de conformarme con cualquier contestaciรณn anodina, puso cara de misterio. Mรกs tarde te cuento, me prometiรณ. Lo mirรฉ con mayor detenciรณn. Registrรฉ el paรฑo lustroso de su traje, la camisa de cuello gastado, el portfolio raรญdo y deformado. A quรฉ tanto misterio, me dije algo fastidiado. Seguramente correteaba los artรญculos plรกsticos queโrecordรฉโfabricaba su suegro, un engreรญdo emigrante alemรกn, que tenรญa bien corto de riendas a ese yerno bohemio en sus severos ojos. De algo hay que vivir, solรญa vivir decir mi finado padre, de algo decente en lo posible. La รบltima vez que tropecรฉ con mi amigo fue en un negocio de muebles de jardรญn sobre la Panamericana, al cual; mi mujer me habรญa arrastrado para conseguir un juego de sillones de hierro, que consideraba de imperiosa necesidad para nuestra quita el club del campo. Fue varios aรฑos despuรฉs de haber perdido nuestre asesorรญa; yo estaba organizando mi shopping-center. Recurro a las etapas de mis negocios para medir el tiempo. Asรญ como otros emplean el crecimiento de sus hijos a modo de cronรณmetro. Cada uno tiene su mรฉtodo.
Entonces fui testigo de la derrota de mi amigo como vendedor de enanos de terracota, aquellos hombrecillos de gorro rojo que sonreรญan bondadosos detrรกs de barbas blancas y que en otros tiempos vigilaban los helechos en los patios y jugaban a las escondidas en la sombra de los jardines de la gente de โclase Media, mรกs bien bajaโ, como suele expresarse Yolanda, mi mujer.
La escena que me tocรณ presenciar en aquella
oportunidad fue bastante bochornosa. Doy gracias a Dios de que el anonadado Marquitos no se percatara de mi presencia. Lo vi inquieto en un rincรณn, sus catรกlogos y listas de precios en el regazo. El dueรฑo del negocio lo habรญa plantado para atender a un caballero, quien con culto susurro manifestaba su interรฉs por uno de esos curiosos enanos, figurillas divertidos, expresiรณn de arte popular, que estaban llegando del Lejano Oriente. El comerciante simulaba no entender; uno nunca sabe si no estรก tratando con algรบn inspector disfrazado, a la pesca de una coima. Por ese seรฑor de compartimento educado, casi se dirรญa tรญmido, mรกs bien se parecรญa al gerente de una antigua casa exportadora de cereales. Hasta podrรญa ser inglรฉs. O catedrรกtico. No se inmutรณ ante el trato elusivo recibido. Ponderรณ el ingenio oriental y el humor popular de un tal Rabelais, quien segรบn se explicaba, no sabรญa de falsos pudores. Citรณ la mitologรญa de Los Antiguos y el Kamasutra, para terminar con las pinturas erรณticas en los muros de las villas de Pompeya.
El comerciante, convencido por fin de la legitimidad del cliente, lo condujo al rincรณn mรกs apartado del salรณn de ventas, pasando por los toboganes y hamacas, sombrillas y colchonetas inflables, hasta llegar a unos enanos de aspecto inocente. De lejos reconocรญ el estilo: engendros de plรกstico reforzado, que portaban delantales de vinรญlica imitaciรณn cuero. El vendedor alzรณ el delantal de uno ellos con gesto dramรกtico, dejando al descubierto un falo obscenamente gigante.
El respetable caballero parecรญa satisfecho; elogiรณ la excelente muestra del arte oriental, como si fuese experto en la materia. Y ordenรณ que cargasen la figura en el coche, cuidando de que no se le quebrara nada. Sin chistar pagรณ el precio exigido.
ยฟSe dio cuenta? โse dirigiรณ el comerciante a Marcos, una vez que el cliente dejรณ el local. –ยฟPor quรฉ no se les ocurren ideas nuevas a los industriales nacionales?
La verdad, somos unos atrasados โ admitiรณ Marquitos con aparente contriciรณn — ยกLo que son los orientales!
Alcancรฉ a observar la cara burlona de mi amigo.
–Viera el รฉxito que tienen esos enanitos pornogrรกficos. Hay clientes que se los llevan de a dos o de a tres. Y parece mentira la clase de gente que viene. Algunos se las dan de sabios, se interesan por los aspectos antropolรณgicos del asunto; me dan cรกtedra sobre mitologรญa, hablan con tono doctoral de Creta, de la Mesopotamia, de los dioses la fertilidad. Se dan aire de profesores para justificar la compra de esa basura. Y me piden que tenga cuidado para a no se les quiebre nada. Crรฉame: yo los fajo que es un gusto; cobro mi impuesto a la lujuria.
El hombre parรณ de hablar. Con una sonrisa de simpatรญa miraba ese infeliz corredor de enanos pasados de moda. Rictus que, en realidad, no era mรกs que un tic nervioso; tal vez la consecuencia del trato demasiado รญntimo con tantos gnomos.
Y entonces sucediรณ algo que no olvidarรฉ por el resto de mi vida. El semblante de Marcos parecรญa iluminarse por dentro; era como si de repente se volviese transparente, dejando al descubierto su verdadera personalidad, oculta detrรกs de la mรกscara de humilde viajante:
–Lo que es importante es satisfacer los deseos de los seres humanos, para que vivan mรกs felices y reine la paz sobre la Tierra โ dijo como pensando en voz alta. Era patente que no se referรญa esos vulgares adefesios.
El comerciante no respondiรณ; se limitรณ a seguir mirรกndolo con se engaรฑosa pseudosonrisa.
Evoquรฉ la ceremonia nupcial en el shil, la pequeรฑa sinagoga de nuestra colonia. Con asombrosa nitidez me llegaron esos detalles minรบsculos, que, analizados en la retrospectiva, parecรญan presagiar los futuros acontecimientos. El leve tufo a sรณtano sin ventilar y la lumbre amarillenta que irradiaban los cirios, bajo el palio, se confundรญan en la luz รกcida de los Sol de Noche. Un clima irreal que me sacudiรณ. Cuando observรฉ a Anita, que tomaba del brazo de su padre que se dirigรญa al palio, acudiรณ a mi memoria una frase de Rabรญ Moshe Lieb: <<Nuestro camino en este mundo es como el filo de una navaja: de un lado estรก el mundo ilusorio y de aquel, el otro mundo. El camino de la vita estรก entre los dos>>. No se crea que yo soy un conocedor de la Cรกbala. Nada de eso: habรญa escuchado la cita aรฑos atrรกs de boca del abuelo de Marquitos. Fue en una de las tertulias que durante las noches de invierno se celebran en la casa de los Silberman. Mi piadoso abuelo Leiva, enemigo de todo lo que olรญa de misticismo, habรญa reprochado a su compaรฑero. ยกCitar semejantes herejรญas en presencia de los niรฑos! Hay que saberse, que mi abuela se aferraba al Shuljan Aruj, compendio que regula la vida de los judรญos conforme con la Ley de Moisรฉs, tal como fue codificada por los talmudistas. Como era lรณgico, contaba con el apoyo incondicional de nuestro shoijet, mientras que el gerente de la cooperativa integraba un dรบo apรณstata con el maestro de hebreo. Ninguno de los dos pertenecรญa al cรญrculo รญntimo de los viejos, y eso sรณlo por ser de otra generaciรณn. El maestro detestaba la rigidez de las leyes rabรญnicas que, segรบn รฉl, estaban asfixiando las fuerzas vitales de los judรญos, a los que รบnicamente el retorno a las fuentes vivas en la vieja-nueva patria podrรญan redimir. Y segรบn el gerente, todas las religiones no eran mรกs que opio para los pueblos. Recuerdo como los dos instaron a mi abuelo para que diera cumplimento a las leyes de la Torรก, lapidando sin mรกs trรกmite a todas las adรบlteras que conocรญa. El abuelo de Marcos se abstenรญa de intervenir en semejantes disputas. Segรบn supe aรฑos mรกs tarde, preferรญa enfrascarse en el estudio del Hemet yamin e ilustrarse asรญ sobre c cรณmo segur una vida conforme con la Cรกbala. A decir la verdad: nunca lleguรฉ a comprender los argumentos esgrimidos por los bebedores de tรฉ. Pero recuerdo la mรบsica de sus voces: la estridencia belicosa de mi irritable abuelo y el profundo cรกntico tranquilizador de Reb Abraham.
*
El servicio en el temple estaba a cargo de Reb Duvid, nuestro shoijet, cuyo fantasma se empeรฑรณ en saludarme mientras yo manejaba el coche. Un hombrecillo enjuto, el rostro pรกlido enmarcado por una barba rala, de nariz larga y filosa, que transmitรญa una impresiรณn de frรกgil espiritualidad. En mis recuerdos sigue canturreando las siete bendiciones de prรกctica. La novia da sus siete vueltas en turno al grupo reunido bajo el palio. Rodeos como lo exige la costumbre. Como siete son los dรญas de la semana y siete vueltas ce la correa alrededor del antebrazo para fijar la cรกpsula de las filacterias. Siete, nos explicaba el abuelo de Marquitos, pese a las protestas de su propia mujer: el valor de letra zeta, zaรญn, que conduce a zโman, el tiempo, con cuyas fibras estรก tejida nuestra identidad. El maestro de hebreo, ese truculente burlador, tenรญa preparada una explicaciรณn irreverente para las siete vueltas de la novia. :as da, pontificaba, para que la concurrencia se convenza de que la niรฑa no estรก embarazada. La entrega del anillo, luego, y la antiquรญsima fรณrmula consagratoria, pronunciada por el novio. Creo que fui uno de los pocos que advirtieron el pequeรฑo incidente que se produjo cuando Anita procurรณ levantar el velo para llevar el cรกliz a sus labios. El tul, prรฉstamo de la madre de Marcos, se enredรณ, y cuando Werner ayudรณ a subirlo se rasgรณ.
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Reunions The story of a loser
I recognized him immediately, even though I only managed to see him from behind. And that was after several years without our paths crossing: practically, since our business failed, the only one we had undertaken together. Perhaps because of the nervous abruptness of his movements or because of those protruding ears, the reason for so many school jokes, the fact was that I knew immediately: it could be none other than Marcos Silberman, Marquitos to his friends. The queue of resigned citizens moved slowly.
*
More than once my mother had warned me: that boy is a shot in the air and, remember my words, he is going to end badly. I never found out what she based her predictions on, accompanied by a look thrown to the sky and a sigh, one of those that only she knew how to emit. Marquitos was a son of our neighbors, the oldest of the three. A boy full of fascinating ideas. I felt a deep admiration for someone who was like that older brother to me, the one I didn’t have. I must clarify that being a neighbor meant a lot in our neighborhood, almost as much as being a relative. Sometimes, more. At first glance, our houses looked alike. The same verandas. The sides of the houses were closed by climbing plants of fragrant flowers: fragrant: honeysuckle, jasmine, wisteria. The same kitchens with two burners, fed by cornflowers and charcoal. Identical toilet stalls, thirty steps behind, the back of the patio, in whose interior some paradise trees soothed with their shade the fire of summer siestas; at night, our chickens slept in their branches. Crochet curtains in front of the small windows; on the wall, photos of bearded old men under the domed glass in an oval frame. As the years went by, I discovered the differences. In the Silberman house there were more books than in ours. Rows of books. On the other hand, we had some additional decorations; a pressed glass centrepiece in the shape of a swan; two oil paintings; Swiss landscapes with snow-capped mountains, cheerful cottages and a few fawns. Of course, each family had its own story, its own secret language and even its own jokes. That was where the biggest differences between the Silbermans and us, the Burdaneks, were evident.
* Shortly before it was his turn, Marcos turned around and discovered me: What a coincidence! It really was, because swallowing colas was not part of my customs. My time is money. He hugged me. Effusively, I would say. What is your life like, I wanted to know. And then, instead of settling for any bland answer, he put on a mysterious face. I’ll tell you later, he promised. I looked at him more closely. I checked the shiny cloth of his suit, the shirt with the worn collar, the worn and deformed briefcase. Why so much mystery, I said to myself, somewhat annoyed. Surely he was running around the plastic articles thatโI rememberedโhis father-in-law made, a conceited German immigrant, who kept that bohemian son-in-law on a tight leash in his severe eyes. You have to live off something, my late father used to say, something decent if possible. The last time I ran into my friend was in a garden furniture store on the Panamericana, where my wife had dragged me to get a set of iron chairs, which she considered imperative for our country club sale. It was several years after we lost our consultancy; I was organizing my shopping center. I use the stages of my businesses to measure time, just as others use the growth of their children as a stopwatch. Each one has his own method. Then I witnessed the defeat of my friend as a seller of terracotta dwarfs, those little men with red hats who smiled kindly behind white beards and who in other times watched over the ferns in the patios and played hide-and-seek in the shade of the gardens of people from the โmiddle class, rather lower class,โ as Yolanda, my wife, often says. The scene I witnessed on that occasion was quite embarrassing. I thank God that the stunned Marquitos did not notice my presence. I saw him fidgeting in a corner, his catalogues and price lists on his lap. The owner of the shop had left him to attend to a gentleman who, in a cultured whisper, expressed his interest in one of those curious dwarfs, funny little figures, an expression of popular art, that were arriving from the Far East. The merchant pretended not to understand; one never knows if one is not dealing with some disguised inspector, fishing for a bribe. From this gentleman with a polite manner, one could almost say shy, he looked more like the manager of an old grain exporting house. He could even be English. Or a professor. He did not flinch at the evasive treatment he received. He pondered the oriental wit and popular humour of a certain Rabelais, who, as he explained, knew nothing of false modesty. He quoted the mythology of the Ancients and the Kama Sutra, ending with the erotic paintings on the walls of the villas of Pompeii. The merchant, finally convinced of the legitimacy of the client, led him to the most remote corner of the sales room, past the slides and hammocks, umbrellas and inflatable mattresses, until he reached some innocent-looking dwarves. From a distance I recognized their style: reinforced plastic creatures, wearing imitation leather vinyl aprons.
The seller lifted the apron of one of them with a dramatic gesture, revealing an obscenely gigantic phallus. The respectable gentleman seemed satisfied; he praised the excellent example of oriental art, as if he were an expert in the matter. And he ordered the figure to be loaded onto the cart, taking care not to break anything. Without a murmur he paid the price demanded. Did you notice? โ the merchant addressed Marcos, once the client left the shop. –Why don’t the national industrialists come up with new ideas? The truth is, we are backward โ admitted Marquitos with apparent contrition โ What the orientals are! I managed to observe my friend’s mocking face. –Look at the success those pornographic dwarves have. There are clients who take them in twos or threes. And it seems incredible the kind of people who come. Some of them think of themselves as wise, they are interested in the anthropological aspects of the matter; They lecture me on mythology, they talk in a doctoral tone about Crete, Mesopotamia, the gods of fertility. They give themselves the air of professors to justify the purchase of this rubbish. And they ask me to be careful not to break anything. Believe me: I’ll beat them up for pleasure; I collect my tax on lust. The man stopped talking. With a sympathetic smile he looked at this unhappy corridor of old-fashioned dwarves. A grimace that, in reality, was nothing more than a nervous tic; perhaps the consequence of dealing too intimately with so many gnomes. And then something happened that I will not forget for the rest of my life. Marcos’s face seemed to light up from within; it was as if he suddenly became transparent, revealing his true personality, hidden behind the mask of a humble traveller: –What is important is to satisfy the desires of human beings, so that they live happier and peace reigns on Earth – he said as if thinking out loud. It was obvious that he was not referring to these vulgar monstrosities. The merchant did not reply, but simply continued to look at him with his deceptive pseudo-smile.
I recalled the wedding ceremony in the shil, the small synagogue in our colony. These tiny details came to me with astonishing clarity, and, in retrospect, seemed to foreshadow future events. The faint smell of an unventilated cellar and the yellowish light radiating from the candles under the canopy blended in with the acid light of the Sol de Noche. An unreal atmosphere that shook me. When I watched Anita, who took her father’s arm as he walked towards the canopy, a phrase from Rabbi Moshe Lieb came to mind: <>. Don’t think that I am a connoisseur of the Kabbalah. Not at all: I had heard the quote years ago from Marquitos’ grandfather. It was at one of the winter evening gatherings held at the Silbermans’ house. My pious grandfather Leiva, an enemy of everything that smacked of mysticism, had reproached his companion. Quoting such heresies in the presence of children! You have to know that my grandmother clung to the Shuljan Aruj, a compendium that regulates the life of the Jews in accordance with the Law of Moses, as it was codified by the Talmudists. Naturally, she had the unconditional support of our shoijet, while the manager of the cooperative was part of an apostate duo with the Hebrew teacher. Neither of them belonged to the inner circle of the old people, and that was only because they were from another generation. The teacher detested the rigidity of the rabbinical laws which, according to him, were suffocating the vital forces of the Jews, , who could only be redeemed by a return to the living sources in the old-new homeland. And according to the manager, all religions were nothing more than opium for the people. I remember how the two urged my grandfather to comply with the laws of the Torah, stoning without further ado all the adulteresses he met. Mark’s grandfather abstained from intervening in such disputes. As I learned years later, he preferred to immerse himself in the study of Hemet Yamin and thereby educate himself on how to lead a life in accordance with Kabbalah. To tell the truth, I never understood the arguments put forward by the tea drinkers. But I remember the music of their voices: the bellicose stridence of my irritable grandfather and the deep, soothing chant of Reb Abraham.
* The service at the temple was conducted by Reb Duvid, our shoichet, whose ghost insisted on greeting me as I drove the car. A thin little man, his pale face framed by a sparse beard, with a long, sharp nose, who conveyed an impression of fragile spirituality. In my memories he continues to hum the seven blessings of practice. The bride takes seven turns in the group gathered under the canopy. Turns as custom demands. As there are seven days in the week and seven turns of the strap around the forearm to secure the capsule of the phylacteries. Seven, Marquitos’ grandfather explained to us, despite the protests of his own wife: the value of the letter zeta, zain, which leads to z’man, time, with whose fibers our identity is woven. The Hebrew teacher, that truculent mocker, had prepared an irreverent explanation for the seven turns of the bride. :as da, he pontificated, so that the audience would be convinced that the girl was not pregnant. Then the delivery of the ring, and the ancient consecratory formula, pronounced by the groom. I think I was one of the few who noticed the little incident that occurred when Anita tried to lift the veil to bring the chalice to her lips. The tulle, borrowed from Marcos’ mother, got tangled, and when Werner helped her to raise it, it tore.
ALEXANDRA KOHAN naciรณ en Mar del Plata en 1971. Es psicoanalista y magรญster en Estudios Literarios por la Facultad de Filosofรญa y Letras de la Universidad de Buenos Aires. Integra, junto con Josรฉ Luis Juresa, el espacio de investigaciรณn y lectura Psicoanรกlisis Zona Franca. Colabora habitualmente en ElDiarioAr, las revistas Polvo y otros medios. Tiene una columna semanal en Dinero y Amor, programa de Blender. Es autora de Psicoanรกlisis: por una erรณtica contra natura (2019) y de los ensayos Y sin embargo, el amor (2020) y Un cuerpo al fin (2022), ambos traducidos al italiano.
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ALEXANDRA KOHAN was born in Mar del Plata in 1971. She is a psychoanalyst and has a masterโs degree in Literary Studies from the Faculty of Philosophy and Letters of the University of Buenos Aires. Together with Josรฉ Luis Juresa, she is a member of the research and reading space Psicoanรกlisis Zona Franca. She regularly collaborates with ElDiarioAr, the magazine Polvo and other media. She has a weekly column in “Dinero y Amor”, a program on Blender. She is the author of Psicoanรกlisis: por una erรณtica contra natura (2019) and the essays Y sin embargo, el amor (2020) and Un cuerpo al fin (2022), both translated into Italian.
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ElDiarioAR 7, Buenos Aires, de septiembre de 2021ย
“Y sin embargo, no dudo cuando digo soy judรญa”
Este aรฑo fui invitada por LimudBA a participar de esa lindรญsima celebraciรณn que se llama Rosh Hashanรก Urbano. Un acontecimiento que emociona por la alegrรญa que suscitan los lazos comunitarios que se construyen.
La idea, como siempre para Limud, es celebrar la diversidad. Me animarรญa a decir que se trata de sacar lo judรญo a la ciudad, de que se mezcle en lo pรบblico, de ser parte de algo que no se encierre en un โnosotrosโ -subrayo que no se encierre-. Fue una experiencia de vitalidad y entusiasmo en medio de una รฉpoca en la que no abundan. Siguen siendo momentos difรญciles para todos y considero que estos espacios nos muestran que, a pesar de todo lo que se rompiรณ, a pesar de que la pandemia no haya terminado, la vida sigue siendo posible, sigue siendo posibilidad. Voy a estar siempre agradecida a LimudBA por ese momento.
Una parte del texto que sigue fue leรญdo ese dรญa:
Yo no sabรญa que era judรญa cuando รญbamos a lo de mi tรญa Raquel a comer kreplaj y varenikes.
Yo no sabรญa que era judรญa cuando mi mamรก hacรญa un leicaj riquรญsimo, unos knishes espectaculares, o un guefilte fish exquisito.
Yo no sabรญa que era judรญa cuando veรญa el carnet de mi papรก de socio vitalicio de Hebraica.
Yo no sabรญa que era judรญa cuando mi papรก decรญa tujes o shikse.
Yo no sabรญa que era judรญa cuando preguntรฉ un dรญa quรฉ querรญa decir que mi hermano estuviera circuncidado.
Yo no sabรญa que era judรญa cuando mi papรก decรญa โ(tal) es paisanoโ.
Yo no sabรญa que era judรญa cuando iba al templo para los casamientos de los amigos de mi hermana.
Yo no sabรญa que era judรญa cuando iba a los Bar Mitzvah de algunos amigos.
Yo no sabรญa que era judรญa cuando escuchaba a mis amigos decir potz.
Yo no sabรญa que era judรญa porque en mi casa nadie habรญa dicho nunca โsos judรญaโ ni โsomos judรญosโ ni โsoy judรญoโ.
Sรฉ, por mi querido amigo Facundo Milman, que Emmanuel Levinas dice: โno se puede ser judรญo sin saberloโ, pero yo era judรญa, aunque no lo supiera, pero lo sabรญa: Como el inconsciente, que es un saber no sabido.
Y un dรญa supe quรฉ era un matrimonio โmixtoโ. Porque resulta que, para algunos judรญos, yo no era judรญa, por el vientre de mi mamรก, pero tampoco era catรณlica por el apellido de mi papรก. ยฟY entonces?
Y entonces pensรฉ que eso tambiรฉn era lo judรญo en mรญ: esa errancia, esa expulsiรณn, ese ir de un lugar al otro sin ser alojada del todo, manteniendo siempre una extraรฑeza en lo familiar, siendo un poco extranjera en lo propio.
En mi familia no se practicรณ jamรกs ningรบn ritual religioso, no se celebrรณ jamรกs ninguna fiesta judรญa.
Y sin embargo, no dudo cuando digo soy judรญa.
El psicoanรกlisis me enseรฑรณ que una identidad no es algo natural y dado y que, en cambio, se construye a partir de mรบltiples escrituras, identificaciones, legados, determinaciones, muchas de ellas, la mayorรญa, inconscientes. Sรฉ, porque estudiรฉ psicoanรกlisis, que la identidad es un palimpsesto que se construye con otros, en la alteridad. Que no hay Yo sin otro y que la identidad es siempre un poco precaria, movediza, inestable; que el ser es una ficciรณn -verdadera como toda ficciรณn-.
Y sin embargo, no dudo cuando digo soy judรญa.
La identidad es un palimpsesto que se construye con otros, en la alteridad. Que no hay Yo sin otro y que la identidad es siempre un poco precaria, movediza, inestable. Y sin embargo, no dudo cuando digo soy judรญa.
Las lecturas que hice a lo largo de mi vida me enseรฑaron que los esencialismos son una usina de prejuicios, que se trata de que sospechemos de eso que tiende a la naturalizaciรณn, que los esencialismos funcionan como un modo de obturar preguntas y coagular estereotipos, de conformar odios y segregaciones. Comparto lo que dice Milman: โser judรญo no es una esencia, es la imposibilidad de ser totalโ. Eso tambiรฉn me lo enseรฑรณ el psicoanรกlisis.
Y sin embargo, no dudo cuando digo soy judรญa.
Yo, que creo con vehemencia, que pensar es dudar, hacer vacilar las certidumbres; que pensar es hacer preguntas, abrir hiatos, interrogar las certezas, no dudo cuando digo soy judรญa.
Quizรกs porque no dudo del poder performativo de la palabra, acaso porque sรฉ que la palabra no es sรณlo un decir, sino que es un hacer, acaso porque sรฉ que el ser es un efecto del decir, acaso porque sรฉ que la palabra funciona en la medida en que se responda por ella, es que no dudo cuando digo soy judรญa.
Me gustรณ mucho lo que dijo Wally Liebhaber en otra ediciรณn del Rosh Hashanรก urbano: โel judaรญsmo es esa pregunta constante que no termina (…) nadie puede arrogarse el derecho a decir quiรฉn es judรญo y quiรฉn no (…) cada uno tiene su manera de ser judรญoโ. Gershom Scholem tambiรฉn habรญa dicho: โยฟquรฉ es ser judรญo? seguir preguntรกndoseloโ. Martรญn Kohan lo dice asรญ: โMe preguntaba, pues, por mi judaรญsmo. ยฟEra judรญo? ยฟhabรญa dejado de serlo? Claro que era judรญo, ยฟpero en quรฉ sentido lo era? Me hacรญa la pregunta, y no daba con la respuesta. Me llevรณ algรบn tiempo advertir que el judaรญsmo radicaba en la pregunta. En la pregunta, antes que en cualquier respuestaโ.
ยฟDe quรฉ estรก hecho mi judaรญsmo? y no ยฟquรฉ es mi judaรญsmo? Dice Diana Sperling: โel acento mรกs puesto en el hacer que en el ser, y el hacer no constituye identidad porque nunca se aquieta, es dinรกmicoโ. Me gusta pensar ahรญ, en eso que me fue legado sin saber, en eso que me fue transmitido sin aleccionamientos. Quizรกs porque en mi familia no hubo dogmatismos es que puedo decir soy judรญa sin tener que dar explicaciones. Quizรกs porque uno de los legados mรกs importantes de mi papรก fue el de practicar la diversidad. No solo casรกndose con una mujer no judรญa, sino evitando hacer de eso una รฉpica. Y es que sรญ, como dice Diana Sperling, โlo que caracteriza a lo judรญo es la diversidadโ.
Quizรกs porque en mi familia no hubo dogmatismos. Quizรกs porque uno de los legados mรกs importantes de mi papรก fue el de la diversidad. No solo casรกndose con una mujer no judรญa, sino evitando hacer de eso una รฉpica.
Acaso por ese amor, entendido como don, es que mi mamรก sabรญa cocinar tan bien comida judรญa. Y es asรญ que pienso que mi ser judรญa estรก hecho de esos pedazos, fragmentos, dispersiones, errancias, en las antรญpodas de cualquier identidad fรฉrrea.
Me gusta decir que la expresiรณn humor judรญo es un pleonasmo. Todos los chistes judรญos que sรฉ, los sรฉ o por mi papรก o por mi libro preferido de toda la obra de Freud: El chiste y su relaciรณn con lo inconsciente, que tiene muchรญsimos chistes judรญos y que iba a ser originalmente un libro sobre humor judรญo. Y es que el chiste funciona, justamente, para hacer caer la autoridad opresiva, hace trastabillar eso que se viene encima de manera fatal. El humor como legado.
Hay legados que se transmiten, muchas veces, sin saber. Por eso Freud cita a Goethe y dice โlo que has heredado de tus padres, adquiรฉrelo para que sea tuyoโ. Lo que supone una operaciรณn sobre eso que viene dado, sobre eso que nos l egan. ยฟQuรฉ se hace con eso que recibimos del otro? Los legados no se reciben pasivamente. Porque eso serรญa estar obligados a reproducirlos. โSer judรญoโ, sigue Milman, โtambiรฉn implica ser responsable de nuestras herenciasโ. Ahรญ hay una posiciรณn รฉtica: responder tambiรฉn por eso.
Para mรญ, pensar siempre es pensar con otros. Y entonces encuentro que Facundo Milman dice โpensamos desde la alteridad -desde la responsabilidad, desde la herencia de una tradiciรณn, desde el otro-, eso es ser judรญoโ. Podrรญa delimitar asรญ una zona en comรบn entre mi judaรญsmo y mi prรกctica del psicoanรกlisis. Justamente ahรญ donde considero que se pueden practicar en la medida en que no se erijan en un dogma, en la medida en que se los pueda seguir leyendo. Porque el judaรญsmo tambiรฉn es lectura, interpretaciรณn. Y leer estรก, para mรญ, en las antรญpodas de las repeticiones religiosas.
Sรฉ que decir โsoy judรญaโ es problemรกtico, que ahรญ empieza el problema. Pero necesito partir de ahรญ para poder expandir la pregunta, esa que sabemos que hace falta formular. Ese judaรญsmo no me fue legado, sino en la medida en que decidรญ tomarlo, no voluntariamente, sino contingentemente, mi judaรญsmo es un hallazgo. Quizรกs por eso mi recorrido es el inverso al de muchos testimonios, en los que se trata de sacarse de encima los dogmatismos para empezar a hacer una vida propia. En mi caso, la vida propia, porque no recibรญ dogmatismos, es con esos fragmentos de judaรญsmo y habiendo incorporado esa pregunta: quรฉ es ser judรญo. Una pregunta que no cesa y que tampoco estรก dada. Como dice Diana Sperling, โtambiรฉn hay que aprender a preguntarโ. Quizรกs ahรญ estรฉ el mayor legado: hacer preguntas que no tienen respuesta y, aun asรญ, seguir haciรฉndolas. Soportar estar en una pregunta sin aplastar nuestras existencias con respuestas, esas que se formularon saltรกndose la pregunta.
Freud se definiรณ a sรญ mismo como un judรญo sin dios. En el prรณlogo a la ediciรณn en hebreo de su texto Tรณtem y Tabรบ, dice que espera coincidir con sus lectores en el convencimiento de que la ciencia sin prejuicios no puede permanecer fuera del espรญritu del nuevo judaรญsmo. Al mismo tiempo, Freud no dejรณ de plantear que las resistencias al psicoanรกlisis tenรญan que ver, tambiรฉn, con que รฉl fuera judรญo. Lo dice asรญ: โquizรก tampoco sea simple casualidad el hecho de que el primer representante del psicoanรกlisis fuese un judรญo. Para profesar esta ciencia era preciso estar muy dispuesto a soportar el destino del aislamiento en la oposiciรณn, destino mรกs familiar al judรญo que a cualquier otro hombreโ. En una carta a la Bโnai Bโrith dice que โcomo judรญo estaba preparado para oponerme y arreglรกrmelas sin el acuerdo de la compacta mayorรญaโ. No caben dudas de que la subversiรณn del descubrimiento freudiano sigue, aรบn hoy, siendo resistido por la โcompacta mayorรญaโ.
Por รบltimo, querรญa retomar la idea de cรณmo la hostilidad y el odio de los otros nos lleva a constituirnos como judรญos en un gesto de resistencia. Lo dijo Hannah Arendt y lo realiza de manera magistral Woody Allen en la escena de Annie Hall llamada I Can’t Believe this Family: el protagonista conoce a la familia de Annie y la abuela, definida por รฉl como una clรกsica โjew haterโ, lo ve directamente como un rabino ortodoxo. Se puede ver acรก. Esa operaciรณn, la de Woody Allen, es exactamente eso: resaltar lo judรญo ante el odio del otro. Ese es un legado que me importa mucho. Peter Gay subraya cรณmo Freud se hacรญa mรกs judรญo en tiempos de hostilidad. En 1926, pensando en la situaciรณn polรญtica contemporรกnea, dice en una entrevista: โmi lengua es el alemรกn. Mi cultura, mis realizaciones, son alemanas Me considerรฉ intelectualmente alemรกn hasta que advertรญ el crecimiento del prejuicio antisemita en los alemanes y en la Austria alemana. Desde ese momento, prefiero llamarme judรญoโ.
Me apena muchรญsimo cuando alguien relativiza el antisemitismo de las redes sociales diciendo โes la redโ, como si la ficciรณn que armamos en nuestras autonarraciones no fueran verdaderas. Si alguien se hace el nazi, un poco nazi es. No hay mรกscara y detrรกs de la mรกscara, otra verdad mรกs real. La mรกscara es ya lo verdadero. Por eso, toda ficciรณn produce efectos de verdad. Creer que una ficciรณn es una mentira es no entender quรฉ es la ficciรณn, pero tambiรฉn es creer que la verdad acerca de uno podrรญa no ser ficcional -en el sentido en que estรก hecha de un modo no natural-. Hay demasiada tolerancia ante el antisemitismo. Dirรฉ que me espeluzna.
Shanรก Tovรก umetukรก.
es una iniciativa de alcance internacional presente en Argentina desde el aรฑo 2007, liderada por voluntarios. Producimos y desarrollamos distintos eventos de educaciรณn judรญa no formal en distintos formatos, con el fin de promover la tradiciรณn, valores y cultura judรญa.
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ElDiarioAR 7, Buenos Aires, de septiembre de 2021
“And, nevertheless, I don’t hesitate when I say I am Jewish.”
This year I was invited by LimudBA to participate in this beautiful celebration called Urban Rosh Hashanah. An event that excites because of the joy that comes from the community ties that are built.
The idea, as always for Limud, is to celebrate diversity. I would dare say that it is about bringing the Jewish into the city, about mixing it in the public, about being part of something that is not enclosed in a โweโ – I emphasize that it is not enclosed. It was an experience of vitality and enthusiasm in the midst of a time when they are not abundant. These are still difficult times for everyone and I believe that these spaces show us that, despite everything that was broken, despite the fact that the pandemic is not over, life is still possible, it is still a possibility. I will always be grateful to LimudBA for that moment.
A portion of the following text was read that day:
I didn’t know I was Jewish when we went to my aunt Raquel’s to eat kreplach and varenikes.
I didn’t know I was Jewish when my mom made delicious leikach, spectacular knishes, or exquisite gefilte fish.
I didn’t know I was Jewish when I saw my dad’s Hebraica lifetime membership card.
I didn’t know I was Jewish when my dad said tujes or shikse.
I didn’t know I was Jewish when I asked one day what it meant that my brother was circumcised.
I didn’t know I was Jewish when my dad said โ(so and so) is a countryman.โ
I didn’t know I was Jewish when I went to the temple for my sister’s friends’ weddings.
I didn’t know I was Jewish when I went to some friends’ Bar Mitzvahs.
I didnโt know I was Jewish when I heard my friends say potz.
I didnโt know I was Jewish because in my house no one had ever said โyou are Jewishโ or โwe are Jewsโ or โI am Jewish.โ
I know, from my dear friend Facundo Milman, that Emmanuel Levinas says: โyou cannot be Jewish without knowing it,โ but I was Jewish, even if I didnโt know it, but I knew it: Like the unconscious, which is an unknown knowledge.
And one day I learned what a โmixedโ marriage was. Because it turns out that, for some Jews, I was not Jewish, because of my motherโs womb, but I was not Catholic either because of my fatherโs last name. So what?
And then I thought that this was also what was Jews in me: this wandering, this expulsion, this going from one place to another without being fully welcomed, always maintaining a strangeness in the familiar, being a bit of a foreigner in my own.
In my family no religious ritual was ever practiced, no Jewish holiday was ever celebrated.
And yet, I do not hesitate when I say I am Jewish.
Psychoanalysis taught me that an identity is not something natural and given and that, instead, it is built from multiple writings, identifications, legacies, determinations, many of them, most of them, unconscious. I know, because I studied psychoanalysis, that identity is a palimpsest that is built with others, in otherness. That there is no I without another and that identity is always a bit precarious, shifting, unstable; that being is a fiction – true like all fiction.
And yet, I do not hesitate when I say I am Jewish.
Identity is a palimpsest that is built with others, in otherness. That there is no I without another and that identity is always a little precarious, shifting, unstable. And yet, I do not hesitate when I say I am Jewish.
The readings I have done throughout my life have taught me that essentialisms are a factory of prejudices, that it is about making us suspicious of that which tends to naturalization, that essentialisms function as a way of blocking questions and coagulating stereotypes, of forming hatreds and segregations. I share what Milman says: โbeing Jewish is not an essence, it is the impossibility of being total.โ Psychoanalysis also taught me that.
And yet, I do not hesitate when I say I am Jewish.
I, who vehemently believe that thinking is doubting, making certainties waver; that thinking is asking questions, opening gaps, questioning certainties, I do not hesitate when I say I am Jewish.
Perhaps because I do not doubt the performative power of the word, perhaps because I know that the word is not just a saying, but a doing, perhaps because I know that being is an effect of saying, perhaps because I know that the word works to the extent that it is answered by it, I do not doubt when I say I am Jewish.
I really liked what Wally Liebhaber said in another edition of the urban Rosh Hashanah: โJudaism is that constant question that never ends (โฆ) no one can claim the right to say who is Jewish and who is not (โฆ) โeach one has his own way of being Jewish.โ Gershom Scholem had also said: โwhat is it to be Jewish? keep asking yourself that.โ Martin Kohan puts it like this: โI wondered, then, about my Judaism. Was I Jewish? Had I stopped being Jewish? Of course I was Jewish, but in what sense was I? I asked myself the question, and I could not find the answer. It took me some time to realize that Judaism was rooted in the question. โIn the question, rather than in any answer.โ
What is my Judaism made of? and not what is my Judaism? Diana Sperling says: โthe emphasis is more on doing than on being, and doing does not constitute identity because it never quiets down, it is dynamic.โ I like to think about that, about what was passed down to me without knowing, about what was transmitted to me without teaching. Perhaps because there were no dogmatisms in my family, I can say I am Jewish without having to give explanations. Perhaps because one of my father’s most important legacies was to practice diversity. Not only by marrying a non-Jewish woman, but by avoiding making an epic out of it. And yes, as Diana Sperling says, โwhat characterizes being Jewish is diversity.โ
Perhaps because there were no dogmatisms in my family. Perhaps because one of my father’s most important legacies was diversity. Not only by marrying a non-Jewish woman, but by avoiding making an epic out of it.
Perhaps it was because of that love, understood as a gift, that my mother knew how to cook Jewish food so well. And so I think that my Jewish being is made of those pieces, fragments, dispersions, wanderings, at the antipodes of any ironclad identity.
I like to say that the expression Jewish humor is a pleonasm. All the Jewish jokes I know, I know them either because of my father or because of my favorite book of all Freud’s work: Jokes and Their Relationship to the Unconscious, which has many Jewish jokes and was originally going to be a book about Jewish humor . And the joke works, precisely, to bring down oppressive authority, it makes that which is coming upon us in a fatal way stumble. Humor as a legacy.
There are legacies that are transmitted, many times, without knowing. That is why Freud quotes Goethe and says โwhat you have inherited from your parents, acquire it so that it is yours.โ What this means is an operation on what is given, on what is bequeathed to us. What is done with what we receive from others? Legacies are not received passively. Because that would be obligated to reproduce them. โBeing Jewish,โ Milman continues, โalso implies being responsible for our inheritances.โ There is an ethical position: to answer for that as well.
For me, thinking is always thinking with others. And then I find that Facundo Milman says โwe think from otherness โ from responsibility, from the inheritance of a tradition, from the other โ that is being Jewish.โ I could thus delimit a common zone between my Judaism and my practice of psychoanalysis. Precisely there where I consider that they can be practiced to the extent that they are not erected into a dogma, to the extent that they can continue to be read. Because Judaism is also reading, interpretation. And reading is, for me, at the antipodes of religious repetitions.
I know that saying โI am Jewishโ is problematic, that the problem begins there. But I need to start from there in order to expand the question, the one that we know needs to be formulated. That Judaism was not bequeathed to me, but to the extent that I decided to take it, not voluntarily, but contingently, my Judaism is a discovery. Perhaps that is why my journey is the opposite of that of many testimonies, in which it is about getting rid of dogmatisms in order to start making a life of one’s own. In my case, my own life, because I did not receive dogmatisms, is with those fragments of Judaism and having incorporated that question: what is it to be Jewish? A question that does not cease and that is not given. As Diana Sperling says, “you also have to learn to ask.” Perhaps that is where the greatest legacy lies: asking questions that have no answer and, even so, continuing to ask them. Enduring being in a question without crushing our existences with answers, those that were formulated by skipping the question.
Freud defined himself as a Jew without a god. In the prologue to the Hebrew edition of his text Totem and Taboo, he says that he hopes to agree with his readers in the conviction that science without prejudice cannot remain outside the spirit of the new Judaism. At the same time, Freud did not fail to suggest that resistance to psychoanalysis was also related to the fact that he was Jewish. He put it this way: โPerhaps it is not a mere coincidence that the first representative of psychoanalysis was a Jew. To profess this science one had to be very willing to endure the fate of isolation in opposition, a fate more familiar to the Jew than to any other man.โ In a letter to Bโnai Bโrith he says that โas a Jew I was prepared to oppose and to manage without the agreement of the compact majority.โ There is no doubt that the subversion of Freudโs discovery continues, even today, to be resisted by the โcompact majority.โ
Finally, I wanted to return to the idea of โโhow the hostility and hatred of others leads us to constitute ourselves as Jews in a gesture of resistance. Hannah Arendt said it and Woody Allen does it masterfully in the scene from Annie Hall called I Can’t Believe this Family: the protagonist meets Annie’s family and the grandmother, defined by him as a classic “Jew hater”, sees him directly as an Orthodox rabbi. You can see it here. That operation, Woody Allen’s, is exactly that: highlighting the Jewish in the face of the hatred of the other. That is a legacy that is very important to me. Peter Gay underlines how Freud became more Jewish in times of hostility. In 1926, thinking about the contemporary political situation, he says in an interview: “My language is German. My culture, my achievements, are German. I considered myself intellectually German until I noticed the growth of anti-Semitic prejudice among Germans and in German Austria. From that moment on, I prefer to call myself Jewish.”
It saddens me greatly when someone relativizes the anti-Semitism of social networks by saying “it’s the network,” as if the fiction we create in our self-narrations were not true. If someone pretends to be a Nazi, he is a bit of a Nazi. There is no mask and behind the mask, another, more real truth. The mask is already the truth. That is why all fiction produces effects of truth. To believe that a fiction is a lie is to not understand what fiction is, but it is also to believe that the truth about oneself might not be fictional – in the sense that it is made in an unnatural way. There is too much tolerance for anti-Semitism. I will say that it creeps me out.
Shana Tova umetuka.
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Libros de Alejandra Kohan/Books by Alejandra Kohan
Abrasha Rotenberg naciรณ en Ucrania, asรญ que su visiรณn de la vida allรญ, como de su vida despuรฉs en Berlรญn o en Buenos Aires, es nostรกlgica. Naciรณ en una aldea, Teofipol, fue trasladado a Moscรบ a los ocho aรฑos, en su familia se alternaban fanรกticos comunistas y anticomunistas. โEn la casa de mi abuelo se hablaba en voz baja, en la de mis tรญos se hablaba con alegrรญa, porque รฉstos creรญan que Stalin iba a sacarnos de la indigencia, que se iba a instaurar el hombre nuevoโ. Luego tuve โla enorme experiencia de vivir en una ciudad modelo de Stalin que se llamaba Magnitogorsk, la primera o la segunda ciudad mรกs contaminada del mundo. Cuando se hizo la revoluciรณn en lo que fue luego la Uniรณn Soviรฉtica, esa era una revoluciรณn contra natura. Rusia era un paรญs agrรญcola ganadero, que todavรญa tenรญa resabios del medioevo. Stalin quiso en diez o veinte aรฑos transformar esa Rusia agrรญcola, tambiรฉn algo ganadera, en una Rusia industrial. Proceso muy difรญcil. Pero Magnitogorsk era el sรญmbolo de eso. Vivรญamos en barracas, una vida horrible.Pero que a mi madre le dio el derecho de obtener una visa para Moscรบ. Y ahรญ tuve una maravillosa experiencia, porque vivรญa en una casa colectiva frente al Kremlin.Eso me dio ocasiรณn para asistir de niรฑo a los maravillosos espectรกculos que habรญa allรญ. Gente de todos los colores, todos en fila para visitar la tumba de Leninโ. Despuรฉs de โla Ucrania ambientaโ allรญ parecรญa haber oro, pero no habรญa. โEl hambre era muy duro, el hambre no te deja pensar. Comรญamos patatas, siempre patatas, o verdura. Jamรกs en los ocho aรฑos que vivรญ en la URSS comรญ carne, ni un trozo de carneโ. Pero la madre se las arreglรณ para viajar a Berlรญn. Allรญ el adolescente alcanzรณ a ver cรณmo Hitler armaba su ejรฉrcito. Pero ni Lenin ni Stalin fueron capaces de transformar el paรญs que heredaronโฆ Luego vino Nueva York. Y despuรฉs vino Argentina, alternada con una รฉpoca en Israel, quizรก su momento mรกs feliz, cuando se estaba haciendo, en 1952, el Estado de Israel. Despuรฉs vino Buenos Aires, y allรญ asentรณ Abrasha su peripecia de mal asiento, hasta que Videla y los suyos acabaron con su carrera de periodista(escritor, periodista, empresario) y abrazรณ un exilio que aquรญ, en Espaรฑa, durรณ 37 aรฑos, hasta que la vida lo devolviรณ a la que ahora es su tierra, despuรฉs de haber conocido, y padecido, y disfrutado, tantas que le fueron esquivas o propicias. Buenos Aires era, cuando mi padre llegรณ allรญ, el futuroโฆ Eran los aรฑos cuarenta. Y a mรญ me contaron que las calles de Buenos Aires no eran de adoquines, eran trozos de oro. Era una leyenda falsa. Ser un extranjero judรญo en la Argentina no era fรกcil. Yo vivรญa lo que era ser judรญo, porque digamos, no se hablaba. Me hice amigo de todos porque aprendรญ castellano rรกpido, por la radioโ. Abrasha se hizo argentino. โFue el azar, el azar, el azar. A los 14 aรฑos empecรฉ a trabajar en un aserradero y me paguรฉ las vacaciones. Cuando se estableciรณ el Estado de Israel, en la Argentina, en el 48, necesitaban personal y como yo habรญa estudiado hebreo, me contrataron. De ahรญ conseguรญ una beca para la Universidad de Jerusalรฉn. Yo estudiaba economรญa y me fui a estudiar. En Buenos Aires, de nuevo, conociรณ a la mujer de su vida, Dina, chilena, cantante, โella tenรญa dieciocho aรฑos, yo tenรญa veintitrรฉs. Setenta aรฑos juntosโ. Se le quiebra la voz al Abrasha que venรญa contando su vida como si fuera a caballo por la Pampa, pero llega hasta su รฉpoca como periodista, al frente, con Jacobo Timerman, de La Opiniรณn, masacrada por Videla. โFue terribleโ.
Adaptada de: Juan Cruz, “La historia insรณlito de Abrasha Rotenberg.” El Periรณdico de Espaรฑa. Madrid 29 de MAYO de 2023.
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La diversidad en el judaรญsmo ofrece un espacio fรฉrtil para la reflexiรณn crรญtica, donde la objetividad se convierte no solo en un ejercicio necesario, sino en un puente hacia el equilibrio entre los extremos. Este proceso nos permite vivir nuestra identidad de manera mรกs coherente y autรฉntica, alineando nuestras raรญces culturales con la realidad contemporรกnea, sin perder de vista la esencia de lo que somosยป. Abrasha Rotenberg
Diversity in Judaism offers a fertile space for critical reflection, where objectivity becomes not only a necessary exercise, but a bridge to balance between extremes. This process allows us to live our identity in a more coherent and authentic way, aligning our cultural roots with contemporary reality, without losing sight of the essence of who we are. Abrasha Rotenberg
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Abrasha Rotenberg
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Abrasha Rotenberg was born in Ukraine, so his vision of life there, as well as her life later in Berlin or Buenos Aires, is nostalgic. He was born in a village, Teofipol, he was moved to Moscow at the age of eight, his family alternated between communist and anti-communist fanatics. He writes, โIn my grandfather’s house we spoke in a low voice, in my uncles’ house we spoke happily, because they believed that Stalin was going to take us out of poverty, that the new man was going to be established.โ Then I had โthe enormous experience of living in a Stalin model city called Magnitogorsk, the first or second most polluted city in the world. When the revolution happen in what later became the Soviet Union, it was a revolution against nature. Russia was a country of agriculture and livestock, which still had traces of the Middle Ages. In ten or twenty years, Stalin wanted to transform that Russia, into an industrial Russia. A very difficult process. But Magnitogorsk was the symbol of that. We lived in barracks, a horrible life. But that gave my mother the right to obtain a visa to Moscow. And there I had a wonderful experience, because I lived in a collective house opposite the Kremlin. That gave me the opportunity to attend, as a child, the wonderful shows that took place. People of all colors, all lined up to visit Leninโs grave. After โthe Ukrainian ambiance.โ there seemed to be gold there, but there wasnโt. โHunger was very hard, hunger doesnโt let you think. We ate potatoes, always potatoes, or vegetables. Never in the eight years I lived in the USSR did I eat meat, not even a piece of meat.โ But the mother managed to travel to Berlin. There the teenager managed to see how Hitler assembled his army. But neither Lenin nor Stalin were able to transform the country they inheritedโฆ Then came New York. And then came Argentina, alternating with a period in Israel, perhaps his happiest moment, when the State of Israel was being created in 1952. Then came Buenos Aires, and there Abrasha settled into his uneasy adventure, until Videla and his people ended his career as a journalist (writer, journalist, businessman) and he embraced an exile that lasted 37 years in Spain, until life brought him back to what is now his land, after having known, and suffered, and enjoyed, so many things that were elusive or propitious to him. “Buenos Aires was, when my father arrived there, the futureโฆ It was the 1940s. And I was told that the streets of Buenos Aires were not made of cobblestones, they were pieces of gold. It was a false legend. Being a Jewish foreigner in Argentina was not easy. I lived what it was like to be Jewish, because, let’s say, they were not spoken. I became friends with everyone because I learned Spanish quickly, from the radio.โ Abrasha became Argentine. โIt was chance, chance, chance. At 14 I started working in a sawmill and I paid for my own vacations. When the State of Israel was established in Argentina in 1948, they needed staff and since I had studied Hebrew, they hired me. From there I got a scholarship to the University of Jerusalem. I was studying economics and I went to study. In Buenos Aires, he met the woman of his life, Dina, a Chilean singer, โshe was eighteen, I was twenty-three. Seventy years together.โ Abrashaโs voice breaks as he recounts his life as if he were riding a horse across the Pampas, but he goes back to his time as a journalist, at the front, with Jacobo Timerman, of La Opiniรณn, massacred by Videla. โIt was terrible.โ
Adapted from: Juan Cruz, “La historia insรณlito de Abrasha Rotenberg. El Periรณdico de Espaรฑa. Madrid 29 MAY 2023
De: Rotenberg, Abrasha. La amenaza (Spanish Edition) . Pampia Grupo Editor. Kindle Edition.
“La amenaza”
โEste hombre miente siempre, pero a veces se le escapa una verdad. Dale una รบltima chance โdijo dirigiรฉndose al Perro como si fuera su consejero. โVoy a hacerte una pregunta y tu futuro depende de tu respuesta โme advirtiรณ el Perroโ. Recordรก la despedida de los Eichenberger y decime si hubo algo mรกs que te llamรณ la atenciรณn. Yo sรฉ que lo recordรกs, pero temรฉs confesarlo porque puede comprometerte o porque se trata de un tema delicado. Si no lo confesรกs, tu vida corre peligro. Si lo confesรกs, podemos llegar a un acuerdo y te vas a ir en paz.
โNo sรฉ de quรฉ estรกs hablando. No recuerdo nada que pueda comprometerme. Todo lo que sรฉ ya te lo dije.
โHay demasiado casualidades en tu relato. Te las ingeniaste para vincularte con el Juez, con la seรฑora Edwina Eichenberger, conmigo y mi familia, con Rudy y sus amigos y estabas desesperado para que te invitemos a nuestra casa porque querรญas conocer a mi padre, el General. En realidad, fingรญas tu interรฉs por mi hermana para ocultar tu verdadero objetivo, que no era mi hermana sino mi padre, yo, Rudy y nuestros amigos. ยฟCasualidades? Confesรก la verdad antes de que yo te la arranque. Repito: ยฟquรฉ mรกs te llamรณ la atenciรณn en esa despedida?
โNo recuerdo nada mรกs. ยฟQuerรฉs que invente algo para satisfacerte? El Perro hizo un gesto a Charles Atlas y yo sentรญ que estaba perdido.
โLlevalo al rรญo โordenรณ con un tono de voz que denotaba indiferenciaโ. Nunca nos contarรก la verdad. Si se ahoga terminarรกn los problemas. Repentinamente Charles Atlas me inmovilizรณ con sus poderosas garras y con la ayuda del Alfeรฑique me arrancรณ de la silla y como si fuera una pluma me dejรณ inmรณvil y de pie, sin soltarme.
โNo sรฉ nadar โgritรฉ desesperado, dirigiรฉndome al rostro feroz del Perro.
โNo te creo. Vos sabรฉs nadar. Ahora vamos a saber si sos un mentiroso o decรญs la verdad.
โยฟQuรฉ querรฉs saber? ยฟAlgo del equipaje? ยฟEran muchas valijasโฆ? El Perro no me respondiรณ. Charles Atlas y el Alfeรฑique comenzaron a arrastrarme en direcciรณn al rรญo y yo seguรญ gritando: โยฟQuรฉ estรกs haciendo? Van a matarme. โยฟQuรฉ estoy haciendo?
Hago patria. Matar a un judรญo es hacer patria. Podรญas haberte salvado, peroโฆ โagregรณ con indiferencia, como si hubiera decidido aplastar una cucaracha con el pie. Entre Charles Atlas y el Alfeรฑique me llevaron hasta las orillas del rรญo y avanzaron unos metros dentro del agua. Yo estaba asustado porque la respiraciรณn, pero ยฟpor cuรกnto tiempo? El pecho comenzaba a dolerme y en unos segundos tendrรญa que abrir la boca y permitir que el agua me inundara. Era el fin. Me habรญa resignado a aceptar mi destino, pero, cuando ya estaba al borde de la resistencia, los secuaces comenzaron a subirme a la superficie. Confundido y mareado empecรฉ a toser, a vomitar el agua y, con dificultades, a respirar. Unos segundos mรกs tarde (que me parecieron interminables) sentรญ que habรญa vuelto a la vida y como ya nada me importaba gritรฉ con todas mis fuerzas:
โยฟQuรฉ quieren de mรญ? Les contรฉ todo lo que sรฉ. Dรฉjense de inventar historias de espionaje. Tengo diecisรฉis aรฑosโฆ
En ese momento, los dos Charles me ayudaron a ponerme de pie y a caminar en direcciรณn al Perro. Me sentaron en una silla, empapado y exhausto. No tenรญa fuerzas para hablar y me dominaba la sensaciรณn de que ya nada me importaba, ni siquiera morir. Al rato se acercรณ el Perro y con el rostro ceรฑudo y una violencia contenida me advirtiรณ:
โยฟVas a contar la verdad o la prรณxima te dejamos bajo el agua para siempre?
Mi corazรณn latรญa acelerado, no podรญa controlar la fatiga de mi cuerpo ni la libertad de mi lengua. Estaba resignado a aceptar mi destino, a someterme a la decisiรณn de un grupo de alienados que, no lo dudo, estaban convencidos de que yo los espiaba porque era parte de una conjura secreta.
โLes voy a decir toda la verdad y si no me creen hagan conmigo lo que quieran. No tengo vergรผenza en confesarlo: por primera vez en mi vida me enamorรฉ. No importa si era la persona inadecuada, pero yo me enamorรฉ.
ยฟAlguno de ustedes se enamorรณ alguna vez? Si les ocurriรณ saben que se trata de una locura, de una enfermedad que te condiciona. Todo el dรญa y toda la noche pensรกs en esa muchacha y harรญas cualquier barbaridad para estar cerca de ella. Yo me convertรญ en un mentiroso para estar cerca de ella, yoโฆ En ese momento se me quebrรณ la voz. Tratรฉ de contenerme y contener las lรกgrimas que se asomaban. Hice un enorme esfuerzo para no llorar y me mantuve en silencio mientras mis verdugos me observaban. Escuchรฉ que King Kong comentรณ:
โEste tipo estรก completamente loco. Luego vi cรณmo el Perro y su gente se alejaron unos metros y tuve la impresiรณn de que conversaban sobre mรญ o tal vez discutรญan. Estaba tan agotado que ni siquiera me interesรณ observarlos. Al rato me pareciรณ que el cรณnclave habรญa terminado y observรฉ que se encaminaban hacia mรญ. Era evidente que algo habรญan decidido, pero ya nada me afectaba.
โยฟQuerรฉs tomar algo? โpreguntรณ el Perro en un tono sorprendentemente amable.
โUn vaso de aguaโ respondรญ.
โReciรฉn tuviste todo un rรญo para beber ยฟy me pedรญs agua? ยฟQuiรฉn te entiende? โexclamรณ el Perro y lanzรณ una carcajada. โEs un chico delicado. Solo bebe agua en vasos. โAportรณ su ironรญa el bello Dorian Gray.
โTraรฉ una copa de vino, asรญ se reanima โordenรณ el Perro y King Kong fue a buscarla. Dorian Gray tomรณ la palabra:
โTe hicimos una broma pesada porque a veces, sin mala intenciรณn, nos descontrolamos. El Perro tiene una educaciรณn militar y en el ejรฉrcito este tipo humor agresivo es bastante habitual. No le temen a la violencia ni al dolor. Te pido que nos disculpes. โยฟUna broma pesadaโฆ? ยฟNada mรกs? El Perro se me acercรณ y tuve conciencia de que deberรญa haberme callado. Mis reproches le molestaron.
โยฟQuรฉ querรฉs saber?
โQuiero saber por quรฉ fui castigado.
โPonete de pie โordenรณ. Aunque yo sentรญa que me faltaban fuerzas obedecรญ en silencio. Estรกbamos frente a frente y รฉl, debo confesarlo, me intimidaba. โCreo que sos un gran farsante y un hรกbil manipulador. No puedo demostrarlo, pero estoy convencido de que nos engaรฑรกs, que nos estuviste espiando para los tuyos, que sos un hipรณcrita. Todos tus pecados poco importan frente al crimen que cargรกs sobre tu conciencia, un crimen imprescriptible que debes asumir: sos un judรญo asesino, un miembro del pueblo deicida que crucificรณ a nuestro Seรฑor y yo soy tu enemigo, un enemigo altruista que va a permitir que seas por unos instantes un cristiano virtuoso. ยฟQuรฉ ordenรณ Jesรบs en el Sermรณn de la Montaรฑa? โAl que te hiriere en una mejilla, ofrรฉcele tambiรฉn la otraโ. Siendo judรญo ahora tenรฉs la oportunidad de comportarte como un buen cristiano. Sin darme tiempo de entender sus palabras recibรญ una violenta cachetada en la otra mejilla, la que me hizo trastabillar y caer, muy adolorido y con la nariz nuevamente sangrando. Desde el suelo pude observar el rostro de cada uno de los presentes. Hice un gesto de incredulidad y preguntรฉ ยฟpor quรฉ? sin obtener respuesta. Los dos lacayos me ayudaron a ponerme de pie y me acomodaron en la silla. El Perro seguรญa frente a mรญ. Temรญ que me siguiera golpeando. โEscuchรก con atenciรณn lo que te voy a decir: si vuelvo a verte alguna vez, sea donde sea, date por muerto. No se trata de una amenaza sino de una sentencia postergada. ยฟEntendiste? Una sentencia postergada. Decidรญ callar. El Perro se encaminรณ hacia la casona y los demรกs lo siguieron en silencio, excepto Charles Atlas que me acercรณ su paรฑuelo para que me tapara la nariz que continuaba sangrando.
โยฟSabรฉs por quรฉ me quedo con vos?โ preguntรณ y yo comencรฉ a preocuparme.
โNo lo sรฉ โrespondรญ angustiado temiendo que mi martirio continuara. โPorque me di cuenta de que sos un tipo honesto. No dudo que te da vergรผenza ser judรญo. Te entiendo, te entiendo muy bien porque a mรญ me sucederรญa lo mismo. Tambiรฉn yo soy un hombre honesto. La frase me doliรณ mรกs que la cachetada. ยฟEra yo un judรญo vergonzante? Me quedรฉ en silencio sin responderle. Charles Atlas continuรณ:
โEscuchรก este consejo que te doy porque te aprecio: desaparecรฉ de inmediato y jamรกs vuelvas a este pueblo. El Perro nunca habla en vano. Otra vez mi cara se habรญa hinchado, tenรญa la nariz partida y un labio me sangraba.
โTe agradezco el consejo. Lo voy a seguir, pero recordรก que me prometieron una copa de vino. Otra vez serรก.
โQue no haya otra vez, te lo digo por tu bien. Hizo un gesto de despedida con la mano y agregรณ:
โTe regalo mi paรฑuelo. Me quedรฉ sentado en la oscuridad y con la mente vacรญa. Sin poder contenerme me desplomรฉ y comencรฉ a llorar. Estaba solo, daรฑado por fuera, dolorido por dentro y dominado por un miedo tardรญo. Podรญan haberme matado. Cuando logrรฉ controlar mi llanto, lentamente me puse de pie. Con gran dificultad empecรฉ a caminar hacia el hotel en medio de la noche cargada de sonidos. Mis temores comenzaron a disiparse. ยฟDe dรณnde habรญa sacado fuerzas para aguantar, fingir y callar?
_________________________________________________
“The Threat”
From: Rotenberg, Abrasha. La amenaza (Spanish Edition) . Pampia Grupo Editor. Kindle Edition.
“This man always lies, but sometimes he lets the truth slip out. Give him one last chance,” he said, addressing the Dog as if he were his advisor.
“”I’m going to ask you a question and your future depends on your answer,” the Dog warned me. “Remember the farewell to the Eichenbergers and tell me if there was anything else that caught your attention. I know you remember it but you’re afraid to confess it because it could compromise you or because it’s a delicate subject. If you don’t confess it, your life is in danger. If you confess it, we can come to an agreement, and you’ll go in peace.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I don’t remember anything that could compromise me. Everything I know I’ve already told you.”
“There are too many coincidences in your story. You managed to get in touch with the Judge, with Mrs. Edwina Eichenberger, with me and my family, with Rudy and his friends and you were desperate for us to invite you to our house because you wanted to meet my father, the General. In fact, you were pretending to be interested in my sister to hide your real objective, which was not my sister but my father, me, Rudy and our friends. Coincidences? Tell the truth before I tear it out of you. I repeat: what else caught your attention in that farewell?”
โI donโt remember anything else. Do you want me to invent something to satisfy you?โ The Dog gestured to Charles Atlas and I felt that I was lost.
โTake him to the river,โ he ordered in a tone of voice that denoted indifference. โHe will never tell us the truth. If he drowns, the problems will end.โ
Suddenly Charles Atlas immobilized me with his powerful claws and with the help of the Weakling he pulled me out of the chair and as if I were a feather he left me motionless and standing, without letting go.
โI donโt know how to swim,โ I shouted desperately, addressing the Dogโs ferocious face.
โI donโt believe you. You know how to swim. Now weโre going to find out if youโre a liar or telling the truth.โ โWhat do you want to know? Something about the luggage? Were there many suitcasesโฆ?โ The Dog didnโt answer me. Charles Atlas and The Weakling began to drag me towards the river, and I continued shouting:
โWhat are you doing? Theyโre going to kill me.โ
โWhat am I doing?โ Iโm serving my country. Killing a Jew is serving my country. You could have saved yourself, butโฆ,โ he added indifferently, as if he had decided to crush a cockroach with his foot. Charles Atlas and the Weakling took me to the banks of the river and advanced a few meters into the water. I was scared because I was breathing, but for how long? My chest was starting to hurt and in a few seconds I would have to open my mouth and allow the water to flood over me. It was the end. I had resigned myself to accepting my fate, but, when I was already at the edge of resistance, the henchmen began to pull me to the surface. Confused and dizzy, I began to cough, vomit the water and, with difficulty, breathe. A few seconds later (which seemed endless) I felt like I had come back to life and as nothing mattered to me anymore I shouted with all my strength:
“What do you want from me? I told you everything I know. Stop making up spy stories. I’m sixteen years oldโฆ” At that moment, the two Charleses helped me to stand up and walk towards the Dog. They sat me on a chair, soaked and exhausted. I had no strength to speak, and I was overcome by the feeling that nothing mattered to me anymore, not even dying. After a while the Dog came over and with a scowl on his face and restrained violence, he warned me:
“Are you going to tell the truth or next time we’ll leave you underwater forever?” My heart was beating fast, I couldn’t control the fatigue of my body or the freedom of my tongue. I was resigned to accept my fate, to submit to the decision of a group of lunatics who, I have no doubt, were convinced that I was spying on them because I was part of a secret conspiracy.
“I’m going to tell you the whole truth and if you don’t believe me, do with me what you want. I’m not ashamed to confess it: for the first time in my life, I fell in love. It doesn’t matter if it was the wrong person, but I fell in love. Have any of you ever fallen in love? If it happened to you, you know that it’s madness, an illness that conditions you. All day and all night you think about that girl and you would do anything to be near her. I became a liar to be near her, Iโฆ” At that moment my voice broke. I tried to hold back the tears that were coming. I made a I made a huge effort not to cry and remained silent while my executioners watched me. I heard King Kong comment:
โThis guy is completely crazy.โ Then I saw the Dog and his buddies move away a few meters and I had the impression that they were talking about me or maybe arguing. I was so exhausted that I didnโt even care to watch them. After a while it seemed to me that the conclave was over, and I saw that they were heading towards me. It was obvious that they had decided something, but nothing affected me anymore.
โDo you want to drink something?โ asked the Dog in a surprisingly friendly tone.
โA glass of water,โ I answered.
โYou just had a whole river to drink, and you ask me for water? Who understands you?โ exclaimed the Dog and burst out laughing. โHeโs a delicate boy. He only drinks water in glasses.โ The beautiful Dorian Gray added his irony.
โBring a glass of wine, that will cheer him up,โ ordered the Dog and King Kong went to get it. Dorian Gray spoke up:
โWe played a practical joke on you because sometimes, without any bad intentions, we lose control. The Dog has a military education, and in the army this type of aggressive humor is quite common. They are not afraid of violence or pain. I beg your pardon. A practical jokeโฆ? Nothing more?โ The Dog came up to me and I realized that I should have kept quiet. My reproaches annoyed him.
โWhat do you want to know?โ
โI want to know why I was punished.โ
โStand up,โ he ordered. Although I felt that I lacked strength, I obeyed silently. We were face to face and he, I must confess, intimidated me. โI think you are a great fraud and a skilled manipulator. I cannot prove it, but I am convinced that you are deceiving us, that you were spying on us for your own people, that you are a hypocrite.โ All your sins matter little compared to the crime you carry on your conscience, an imprescriptible crime that you must assume: you are a murderous Jew, a member of the deicide people who crucified our Lord and I am your enemy, an altruistic enemy who will allow you to be a virtuous Christian for a few moments. What did Jesus command in the Sermon on the Mount? โTo him who strikes you on one cheek, offer the other also.โ Being a Jew, you now have the opportunity to behave like a good Christian. Before I had time to understand his words, I received a violent slap on the other cheek, which made me stumble and fall, very sore and with my nose bleeding again. From the ground I could see the face of each one of those present. I made a gesture of disbelief and asked why? without getting an answer. The two lackeys helped me to stand up and placed me in the chair. The Dog was still in front of me. I feared that he would continue hitting me.
“Listen carefully to what I’m going to tell you: if I ever see you again, wherever it may be, consider yourself dead. This is not a threat but a delayed sentence. Do you understand? A delayed sentence.” I decided to remain silent. The Dog headed towards the mansion and the others followed him in silence, except Charles.
Atlas offered me his handkerchief to cover my nose, which continued to bleed. “Do you know why I’m staying with you?” he asked and I started to worry.
“I don’t know,” I responded, anguished, fearing that my martyrdom would continue. โBecause I realized that you are an honest guy. I have no doubt that you are ashamed to be Jewish. I understand you, I understand you very well because the same thing would happen to me. I am also an honest man. The phrase hurt me more than the slap. Was I a shameful Jew? I remained silent without answering him. Charles Atlas continued: “Listen to this advice that I give you because I appreciate you: disappear immediately and never return to this town. The Dog never speaks in vain.
My face was swollen again, my nose was broken, and my lip was bleeding. “I thank you for the advice. I’m going to follow it, but remember that they promised me a glass of wine. Another time.”
“Don’t let it happen again, I’m telling you for your own good.” He waved his hand and added: “I’m giving you my handkerchief.”
I sat in the dark with an empty mind. Unable to contain myself, I collapsed and began to cry. He was alone, damaged on the outside, hurt on the inside and dominated by a belated fear. They could have killed me. When I managed to control my crying, I slowly stood up. With great difficulty I began to walk towards the hotel in the middle of the night full of sounds. My fears began to dissipate. Where had I gotten the strength to endure, pretend and remain silent?
Translated by Stephen A. Sadow
_________________________________________________
Otros libros de Abrasha Rotenberg/Other books by Abrasha Rotenberg
Liliana Lukin naciรณ en Buenos. Aires en 1951 en una familia judรญa. Publicรณ los libros de poesรญa: Abracadabra, 1978); Malasartes, Descomposiciรณn, 1986; Cortar por lo Sano, 1987; Carne de Tesoro, 1990; Cartas, 1992; Las preguntas, 1998); retรณrica erรณtica , 2002) y Construcciรณn comparativa , 2003 y ortros. Recibiรณ entre otros Secretarรญa Cultura de la Naciรณn, Fundaciรณn Antorchas, 1989 y Beca del Fondo Nacional de las Artes, 1997. Entre 1988 y 1989 fue Asesora Literaria del Centro Cultural Gral. San Martรญn y organizรณ el Foro de Literatura Contemporรกnea y el 1ยบ Foro de Cine Argentino. Desde 1988 hasta 2001 fue Asesora Literaria de la Fundaciรณn Noble-Clarรญn , organizรณ XIII Encuentros de Escritores R.Noble, y editรณ los correspondientes โCuadernos de Narrativa Argentinaโ. Es Lic. en Letras de la Universidad de Bs.As., docente en la carrera de Crรญtica de Artes en el IUNA (Instituto Universitario Nacional de Arte) y coordina la Clรญnica de escritura poรฉtica de la Biblioteca Nacional de la Argentina. Si sitio web es http://www.lilianalukin.com.ar
_______________________________
Liliana Lukin was born in Buenos Aires in 1951 into a Jewish family. She published the following books of poetry: Abracadabra, 1978); Malasartes 1986, Decomposiciรณn, 1987; Cortar por lo Sano,, 1987); Tesoro de carne, 1990; Cartas, 1992; Las preguntas, 1998); retรณrica erรณtica, 2002; and Construcciรณn comparativa, 2003 and others. She received awards, among others, the Secretariat of Culture of the Nation, the Antorchas Foundation, 1989 and a Scholarship from the National Endowment for the Arts, 1997. Between 1988 and 1989 she was Literary Advisor to the General San Martรญn Cultural Center and organized the Contemporary Literature Forum and the 1st Argentine Film Forum. From 1988 to 2001 she was Literary Advisor of the Noble-Clarรญn Foundation, organized the XIII R.Noble Writers’ Meetings, and edited the corresponding โCuadernos de Narrativa Argentinaโ. She has a degree in Literature from the University of Buenos Aires, teaches in the Arts Criticism course at the IUNA (National University Institute of Art) and coordinates the Poetic Writing Clinic of the National Library of Argentina. Her website is http://www.lilianalukin.com.ar
___________________________________________
Poesรญa de Liliana Lukin/Poetry by Liliana Lukin
Sueรฑo con lobos, los corderos
persiguen mi sueรฑo,
quieren entrar en รฉl
como quien entra atropellando
en la jaula de su miedo.
*
El amor del lobo por la sangre
del cordero escribe
el drama del rebaรฑo:
ser el objeto de un deseo
que sรณlo se sacia en el sacrificio.
*
El cordero sabe que es la metรกfora
de otra cosa, que el lobo es
la metรกfora de otra cosa: comienza
con palabras como amor, y termina
con la muerte de alguna pasiรณn colectiva.
*
El pelaje del lobo estรก hecho para la caricia
que no conocerรก, inevitablemente el lobo ama
el amor en el cordero, pero mรกs los brazos que cargan
al cordero, las manos que se deslizan por su lomo,
la paz de ser el perseguido y no el perseguidor.
*
Toda marca al final del pacto, una firma
hecha con los dientes, aleja al mordedor
de la letra, ni el sรญmil entre piel y papel
permitirรก engaรฑarse: de lo humano imaginado
en el amor de esa marca no hay mรกs que terror.
De Ensayo Sobre el Poder, 2015
__________________________________________
___________________________________________
I dream of wolves, the lambs
pursue my dream
they want to enter it
like someone who enters abruptly
into a jail of his fear
*
The wolvesโ love for the lambโs
blood writes
the drama of the flock
to be the object of a desire
that is only sated with sacrifice.
*
The lamb knows that it is the metaphor
Of something else, that the wolf is the
metaphor forsomethingelse; it starts out
with words like love, and ends
with the death of some collective passion.
*
The wolfโs fur is made for the caress
that that it will not know, inevitably the wolf loves
the love in the lamb
but more the arms that carry
the lamb, hands that slide along its back,
the peace of being the pursued and not the pursuer.
*
Everything marks the end of the pact, a signature
made with teeth, moves away from the biter
of the letter, not even the simile between paper and paper
will permit it to deceive itself: of the imagined human
in the love of this mark there in only terror.
De Ensayo Sobre el Poder, 2015
**
Pandora huele
una palabra
si se guarda mucho tiempo
larga heces
materias hirientes
al ojo y al oรญdo
humedades
hace
sangre por varias de sus partes
no se pudre
dada su condiciรณn
de testigo de cargo
pero apesta
De Descomposiciรณn.1980-82,1987
**
Pandora smells
a word
if it watches out for it for a long time
lets out the dregs
materials hurtful
to the eye and the ear
dampness
it makes
blood through several of its parts
it doesnโt rot
given its condition
as witness of in charge
but it smells bad
De Descomposiciรณn.1980-82,1987
perder la orientaciรณn: eso hace
mi hermano como en medio del
mar, sin referencias fijas,
rodeado del relente de su
desolaciรณn, de la falta de
asociaciones llamadas correctas,
de algunas imรกgenes que evocan
aรฑos, rituales, pedazos,
pierde el sentido y anda sin rumbo,
por un pasaje estrecho, hรบmedo y seguro
*
to lose orientation, that my brother
does in the middle of the
sea, without fixed references,
surrounded by the relentlessness of his
desolation, by the lack of
associations called correct,
of some images that evoke
years, rituals, pieces,
he loses sense and moves without direction,
through a narrow, damp and sure passageway
*
mamรก trabaja para un naufragio
seco: prepara sus actos previendo agua
como en un ejercicio: insiste en ignorar
que algo se rompiรณ, que la ola
no existe pero estamos bajo su sonido
y su furia, rema, acumula baldes
que antes tuvieron plantas, para โachicarโ
el desborde, mantiene el ancla
*
mama works for a dry
ship wreak; prepares her actions anticipating water
as an exercise, she insists on ignoring
that something broke, that the wave
doesnโt exist, but rather we are under his sound
and fury, she accumulates pots
that before held plantsto โbail outโ
the overflow, to maintain the anchor
*
papรก va de la popa a la proa
como en un barco a la deriva, grita
ยกa babor!, ยกa estribor!, como si supiera
algo de navegar, de tormentas
en el centro del remolino,
de lo que no se puede saber
hasta que confunde, quema, moja: papรก es un viejo
capitรกn que mamรก sostiene soga en mano
*
papa goes from the stern to the prow,
as if in a boat adrift, he shouts
to the โport sideโ โto the starboardโ, as if he knew
something of the navigation of storms
in the center of the whirlpool,
of what one canโt know
until it confounds, burns, wets; papa is an old man
captain that mama sustains, rope in hand
**
carta II
mi querida: me dije algรบn poema tiene que haber
porque hay tanto ruido en el paรญs to
y en estos dรญas las metรกforas se cumplen
ya casi no hablamos mรกs
que de nosotras: metonimias de un paisaje de guerra
o pequeรฑos predios donde cultivar imรกgenes de sรญ
querida: se disuelve mi dogma a medida que amo
y aunque mi dogma sea de una especie razonable
padezco los efectos de esta fatal transformaciรณn:
no sรฉ nada ya de aquello que era
pero no olvido tampoco cรณmo era aquello ser
una foto de otra รฉpoca me muestra como a una muchacha
a la que he conocido: mi nostalgia de ella es infinita
aunque me diga que todo estรก muy bien y
aunque sea cierto que todo estรก (muy bien) ahora
algรบn poema tiene que haber me dije: en lugar
de una certeza siempre hay un poema
y en lugar de un poema siempre estoy
escribiendo cartas como un nรกufrago al revรฉs:
no corro peligro mรกs que de mรญ y el mundo
es una isla en la que sรณlo puedo sumergirme
mi querida en estos dรญas
en que la filosofรญa es un murmullo de la edad
sos el ruido de un paรญs en predios secos
donde un poema serรญa agua de beber.
De Cartas, 1992.
“Letter”
Mi querida: You told me about some poem that must exist
because there is so much noise in the country
and these days metaphors come to be
We hardly speak any more
about how we, metonymies of a battlefield
or small properties in which to cultivate images of your approval
dear: my dogma dissolves as I love
and although my dogma be of a reasonable sort
I suffer the effects of this fatal transformation.
I donโt yet know anything about what it was
but neither do I forget how that being was
a photo of another time shows me how a girl
that I have known, my nostalgia about her is infinite
even if I tell myself that everything is alright and
even if it be certain that everything is (very well) now
some poem must have, I told myself: instead of
a of certainty there is also a poem
and in place of a poem, I am always here
writing letters like a backwards ship wreak:
Iโm not in danger of more than myself and the whole world
is an island in which I can only immerse myself
my dearest during these days
in which philosophy is a murmur of the age
you are the noise of a country of dry lands
where a poem would be water to drink.
De Cartas, 1992
*
He descubierto una rama de odio
en la magnolia del parquecito:
no es de nadie el รกrbol, el paseo,
el descubrimiento.
De quiรฉn es el odio?
Ama la magnolia su brote,
su rama que estalla a punto
de floraciรณn bella y blanca?
Quรฉ estupor ver esa especie
creciendo, su inocencia
aparente en la forma de
encarnar,
quรฉ deseo de un
alerta a los sentados, los solos,
los amantes de la sombra,
decir: cuidado allรญ, cuidado asรญ
yo misma asustada
todavรญa, conjeturando sobre
modos sorpresivos de proliferaciรณn
de un sentimiento
en el reflejo del cristal que el hielo deja
en el tapiz, el musgo en la terraza,
dentro del poso de la taza de cafรฉ,
hay un odio que crece para alguien
en el cuajo de leche y en la cepa
del vino y en el hilo de coser
puede haber odio.
Camino hacia la zona de luz,
salgo del bosque casi artificial,
de utilerรญa, los bancos en la grava,
llevo la rama
pesada, todo lo que miro
se enturbia en el agobio
del recuerdo de un รกrbol.
Mala semilla durmiendo
entre nosotros, para siempre burlados
en la idea de un Jardรญn.
*
I have found a branch of hatred in
the magnolia of the little park:
the tree doesnโt belong to anyone, the promenade (short walk)
Nacรญ en Argentina en 1952 y emigrรฉ a Israel en 1972. Graduada en Literatura Espaรฑola por la Universidad Hebrea de Jerusalรฉn. Postgrado en Ciencias de la Informaciรณn de la Universidad de Haifa. M.Ed. en Educaciรณn linguรญstica en sociedades multiculturales, del Instituto Levinsky del Profesorado. Mi proyecto de investigacion trata sobre las relaciones entre el ejercito y la sociedad civil en Israel, desde el ciberdiscursoHe iniciado un camino espiritual a traves de una reflexion sobre el proceso creativo y recientemente he iniciado estudios formales de Budismo en el marco de un curso para formacion de maestros de Meditacion budista. Ejerzo como profesora de Lengua y Literatura Espaรฑola, escritura creativa y arte.Poeta en espaรฑol y hebreo y traductora. Artista plรกstica e ilustradora.Publicada, premiada, antologada y traducida al inglรฉs, hebreo, francรฉs, portuguรฉs, italiano, alemรกn , mixteca y sueco. Autora de catorce poemarios que publico en internet, para el acceso de todos los lectores en espaรฑol: Anfibia, Cuerpo mediterrรกneo, Monรณlogo en la arena, Libro de las horas lejanas, Body Art, Revisiรณn de los amores, El abrazo de la diosa , Rios y penumbras, Homenaje a la caligrafia efimera, Zona, Movilizacion, Secuencias, Pausa y Paradero. Asimismo soy autora de dos poemarios en hebreo, inรฉditos: Orillas y Antes del viaje.En mi escritura reflejo las voces de un mandala interior en busca de armonรญa y equilibrio como รบnica supervivencia posible en este Medio Oriente excesivo, encandilante y luctuoso.Estudiรฉ Arte en la Academia de Bellas Artes de Florencia, Italia y en talleres de notables maestros en Israel como Iosef Hirsh, Dan Kriger y Aharon April. Ahora estoy aprendiendo caligrafia japonesa con el master zen japonรฉs Ishii Katsuo.
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I was born in Argentina in 1952 and emigrated to Israel in 1972. Graduated in Spanish Literature from the Hebrew University of Jerusalem. Postgraduate in Information Sciences from the University of Haifa. M.Ed. in Language Education in Multicultural Societies, from the Levinsky Teachers Institute. My research project is about the relations between the army and civil society in Israel, from cyberdiscourse. I have begun a spiritual path through a reflection on the creative process and I have recently begun formal studies of Buddhism within the framework of a training course. of Buddhist Meditation teachers. I work as a teacher of Spanish Language and Literature, creative writing and art. Poet in Spanish and Hebrew and translator. Visual artist and illustrator. Published, awarded, anthologized and translated into English, Hebrew, French, Portuguese, Italian, German, Mixtec and Swedish. Author of fourteen collections of poems that I publish on the internet, for access to all readers in Spanish: Anfibia, Cuerpo mediterrรกneo, Monรณlogo en la arena, Libro de las horas lejanas, Body Art, Revisiรณn de loamores, El abrazo de la diosa , Rios y penumbras, Homenaje a la caligrafia efimera, Zona, Movilizacion, Secuencias, Pausa y Paradero. I am also the author of two unpublished collections of poems in Hebrew: Shores and Before the Journey. In my writing I reflect the voices of an inner mandala in search of harmony and balance as the only possible survival in this excessive, dazzling and mournful Middle East. I studied Art in the Academy of Fine Arts in Florence, Italy and in workshops of notable masters in Israel such as Iosef Hirsh, Dan Kriger and Aharon April. Now I am learning Japanese calligraphy with the Japanese Zen master Ishii Katsuo.
Miryam Gover De Nasatsky se graduรณ como profesora enLetras en la Universidad Nacional del Litoral, Argentina. Docente e investigadora. Con una beca del Fondo Nacional de las Artes editรณ La Bibliografรญa de Alberto Gerchunoff. Conjuntamente con la Lic. Ana Weinstein dio a conocer los dos tomos del libro Escritores judeoargentinos: bibliografรญa 1900-1987. Ademรกs, con Ana Weinstein y Roberto Nasatsky, relevaron las distintas facetas de la actividad musical en Trayectorias musicales judeo-argentinas. Ha presentado ponencias en congresos internacionales y colabora en varias revistas literarias argentinas. Entre sus obras estรกn dos poemarios Persistentes vibraciones (1999) y Resonancias de Auschwitz (2011); y tres novelas histรณricas, La pasiรณn de un visionarioโTheodor Herzl (2004) y Desde la cima:Reminiscencias de David Ben-Guriรณn (2008) y Hacia la libertad (2015)
______________________________________
Miryam Gover de Nasatsky graduated with a degree in education from the National University of the Littoral, Argentina. She is a teacher and researcher. With a fellowship from the National Fund for the Arts, she edited the Bibliografรญa de Alberto Gerchunoff. With Ana Weinstein, she published the two volumes of Escritores judeo-argentinos: bibliografรญa 1900-1987. Also, with Ana Weinstein and Roberto Nasatsky, she described the diversity of musical activity in Trayectorias musicales judeo-argentinas. Miryam Gover de Nasatsky has presented papers at international conferences. She is a contributor to various Argentinean literary magazines. Gover de Nasatsky is the author of two books of poems, Persistentes vibraciones (1999) and Resonancias de Auschwitz (2011); and two historical novels, La pasiรณn de un visionarioโTheodor Herzl (2004) and Desde la cima: Reminiscencias de David Ben-Guriรณn (2008) and Hacia la libertad (2015.)
___________________________________________
_______________________________________
DENSA PENUMBRA
En Amertรกstica cambiaban rรกpidamente no sรณlo las costumยญres y su sistema polรญtico sino tambiรฉn las ciudades y la vegetaciรณn. Miles de hectรกreas boscosas devastadas por el fuego estabanยญ arrasando los รกrboles y arbustos autรณctonos – leรญ en un dรญaยญ de ese tiempo. No podรญan combatir el incendio que habรญa estado fuera de control cuando aparentaba estar sofocado. La guardia de cenizas recorrรญa constantemente el lugar con el fin de apagar nuevos focos.
Todo parecรญa conjurarse contra esta regiรณn situada en el heยญmisferio sur, a pesar de sus habitantes tan alegres, trabajadores y clientes. La sequรญa que afecta el territorio y el viento provenientede la cordillera de los Andes influyeron para que el fuego se hicieran inmanejable- era la explicaciรณn dada por los tรฉcnicos.
Un periรณdico local describรญa la lucha contra las llamas desยญde el aire, por medio de un helicรณptero el cual arrojaba baldes de agua que se evaporaba antes de llegar al suelo y, desde la tierra, porun viejo camiรณn. รste sรณlo tenรญa tracciรณn trasera y resbalaba en el mismo lugar sobre la arenosa estepa patagรณnica.
Huรญan distintas especies de animales y bandadas de pรกjaros. Faltaba personal especializado, recursos y agua. El humo proยญducido se sumรณ a la neblina existente, aunque provenรญa de una zona lejana y casi olvidada. Por suerte, los circuitos turรญsticos de la regiรณn no se vieron afectados y todos continuaron disfrutanยญ do de ellos.
Un empresario japonรฉs, cuyo nombre no pude descifrar, ya estaba interesado en dichas tierras libres de รกrboles que tanto lugar ocupan. Las consideraba propicias para un nuevo emprenยญdimiento industrial. Por Lo visto, no todo estรก perdido -decรญan los pobladores -quizรกs allรญ consigamos trabajo. Serรญa un nuevo diseรฑo para el paรญs. La evoluciรณn era permanente pero no lograban recobrar la claridad, habรญa que adaptarse a la densa penumbra. Este fenรณยญmeno evitaba percibir el estado en que se encontraban las ciuยญdades cubiertas de suciedad, excremento canino y basura. Por supuesto, habรญa camiones recolectores pero nunca terminaban de limpiar porque, a medida que levantaban los desperdicios, otros aparecรญan de inmediato. La palabra contaminaciรณn no asustaba a nadie aunque podรญa verse afectada el agua del rรญo y la fauna ictรญcola.
Se iba gestando una peligrosa concentraciรณn de productos quรญยญmicos perjudiciales para La salud humana como el fรณsforo– segรบn opinaban los entendidos. Sรณlo era cuestiรณn de hacer cumplir las ordenanzas que prevรฉn tal estado de cosas.
Una soluciรณn fue no baรฑarse en el rรญo; otra, no abastecer de agua a algunos barrios que la estaban solicitando desde hacรญa aรฑos. De todas maneras, se incrementaba la expectativa de vida a pesar de que tal situaciรณn amenazaba con producir consecuenยญcias nocivas para la salud.
–Los macro-negocios no suelen tener en cuenta el impacto amยญbiental– aseguraba una sicรณloga social anee el proyecto de consยญtruir quinientos complejos urbanรญsticos privados, en una isla del Delta. Los riesgos quedan relativizados ante la perspectiva de contar con un gran parque de diversiones al estilo Disney. Es una buena tรกctica para revalorizar zonas y llamar la atenciรณn sobre ellas a hombres de negocios.
A medida que me compenetraba acerca de la vida de este territorio tan particular, con sus proyectos, dificultades y soluยญciones, mรกs me intrigaba la espesa capa que lo envolvรญa. Tenรญa sus ventajas porque atenuaba los efectos del agujero de ozono pero siempre es preferible la transparencia y, sobre todo, poder distinguir los objetos. Faltaba la lucidez que iluminara el camino y que permitiera orientarse en la ventolera electoral con compaรฑas proselitistas a las que se dedicaban los supuestos futuros prรณceres. Visibilidad escasa– advertรญa todos los dรญas el pronรณstico. Por eso trataban de resaltar los mรฉritos de quienes integraban las listas.
No quise guiarme por las noticias engaรฑosas y entrevistรฉ a sobrevivientes de la รฉpoca quienes estaban confiados en que pronto se develarรญa el misterio de la comarca. Creรญan en prediยญcadores que habรญan augurado un futuro mejor donde las leyes no se modificaran segรบn la conveniencia de cada uno. Los mรกs ancianos conservaban vestigios de un pasado feliz en el que no se escuchaban cantos truenos y los gobernantes eran inocentes. Toda รฉpoca pasada fue mejor -reperรญan con sabidurรญa- la memoยญria conserva los recuerdos gratificantes. Por supuesto, no mencioยญ naron la pastosa niebla en aumento la cual producรญa la sensaciรณn de que el tiempo no transcurrรญa.
Siempre se habรญan superado las crisis y รฉsta, seguramente, era una mรกs en la larga litca desde la รฉpoca de la colonia. La historia fue repitiendo un juego de alternancia entre polรญticas esratizantes y privatizantes segรบn los intereses de turno. Por suerte, Amertรกstica contaba con excelentes recursos naturales. El problema consistรญa en las fallas de la administraciรณn y en esa amenaza latente que producรญa hechos inexplicables. Empezaba a entender lo que sostenรญa un economista: -La crisis es un estado coyuntural de escasa importancia.
Hacรญa falta una cuota de entusiasmo aunque despuรฉs viniera el desconcierto que, poco a poco, invadiรณ rodas las actividaยญ des. Se insinuaba una tormenta. Los pobladores no la percibรญan ya que estaban muy entretenidos llenando planillas urgentes y adquiriendo objetos importados de codos los colores. Sรญ, un feยญnรณmeno curioso era la presencia de miles de contenedores; por suerte, de dimensiones considerables que podรญan detectarse a pesar del aire enrarecido. Un gran logro de la moderna globalizaciรณn. Tal distracciรณn permitรญa dejar de lado las hipรณtesis pesimista que generaba la paralizaciรณn parlamentaria.
Proyectos empantanados –leรญ en uno de los principales matutinos debido a que no lograban una estrategia conjunta los distintos bloques que formaban la cรกmara. No se ponรญan de acuerdo: unos querรญan derogar leyes recientemente aprobadas o aprovechar la ausencia de colegas para estblecer nuevas condiciones. De esta forma, no podรญan sesionar.
Se trabaron varias propuestas consideradas fundamentales por el Ejecutivo —aclaraba el mismo periรณdico. Era necesario superar las diferencias para no perder el espรญritu democrรกtico. Habรญa reuniones muy difรญciles ya que la oposiciรณn pedรญa demasiadas explicaciones y los otros no tenรญan respuestas precisas ==Solamente sabemos lo que informan los medios– se excusaban. Por ejemplo, era difรญcil desenmascarar a los culpables de tantos atentados. Siempre tenรญan a mano los identikits, por las dudas, pero se confundรญan porque habรญa muchos parecidos. No era fรกcil: a veces, terminaban desconfiado de las vรญctimas.
–Los jueces no son detectives–aclaraba con un aire didรกctico un famoso legislador.
—La fundamental era no violar el secreto de sumario- recordaba los polรญticos comrpehensivos.
Incertidumbre e niebla, dos constates, se apoderaron de los habitantes quienes realizaban sus tareas como autรณmatas. Asรญ se les fueron atrofiando los sentidos y la capacidad de pensar. Pero no precisaban ejercitar esa รบltima facultad, todo estaba bastante resuelto. Los problemas que surgรญan eran normales; no nos olvidamos que el ser humano es limitado.
Amertรกstica no podรญa ser eterna. Despuรฉs de revisar los archivos queda en mi imaginaciรณn la sensaciรณn de lo que pudo ser y el recuerdo de los pobladores con sus esperanzas y proyectos. Quizรก algรบn dรญa se realice su segunda fundaciรณn.
_______________________________
________________________________
DENSE PENUMBRA
In Amertรกstica, not only the customs and political system but also the cities and vegetation changed rapidly. Thousands of forested hectares devastated by fire were destroying native trees and shrubs – I read on one day at that time. They could not fight the fire that had been out of control when it appeared to be out. The ash guard constantly toured the place in order to extinguish new outbreaks.
Everything seemed to conspire against this region located in the southern hemisphere, despite its cheerful, hard-working and customer-oriented inhabitants. The drought that affects the territory and the wind coming from the Andes mountain range influenced the fire to become unmanageable – was the explanation given by the technicians.
A local newspaper described the fight against the flames from the air, by means of a helicopter which dropped buckets of water that evaporated before reaching the ground, and, from the ground, by an old truck. This one only had rear-wheel drive and was slipping in the same place on the sandy Patagonian steppe.
Different species of animals and flocks of birds were fleeing. There was a lack of specialized personnel, resources and water. The smoke produced added to the existing fog, although it came from a distant and almost forgotten area. Luckily, the region’s tourist circuits were not affected and everyone continued to enjoy them.
A Japanese businessman, whose name I could not decipher, was already interested in these tree-free lands that occupy so much space. He considered them conducive to a new industrial venture. Apparently, not everything is lost – the residents said – maybe we will find work there. It would be a new design for the country. The evolution was permanent but they could not regain clarity, they had to adapt to the dense darkness. This phenomenon prevented us from perceiving the state of the cities covered in dirt, dog excrement and garbage. Of course, there were collection trucks but they never finished cleaning because, as they picked up the waste, others immediately appeared. The word pollution did not scare anyone, although the river water and the fish fauna could be affected.
One solution was not to bathe in the river; another, not supplying water to some neighborhoods that had been requesting it for years. In any case, life expectancy increased despite the fact that such a situation threatened to produce harmful consequences for health.
“Macro-businesses do not usually take into account the environmental impact,” said a social psychologist behind the project to build five hundred private urban complexes on an island in the Delta. The risks are relativized by the prospect of having a large Disney-style amusement park. It is a good tactic to revalue areas and draw attention to them to businessmen.
“Macro-businesses do not usually take into account the environmental impact,” said a social psychologist behind the project to build five hundred private urban complexes on an island in the Delta. The risks are relativized by the prospect of having a large Disney-style amusement park. It is a good tactic to revalue areas and draw attention to them to businessmen.
The more I learned about the life of this very particular territory, with its projects, difficulties and solutions, the more intrigued I was by the thick layer that enveloped it. It had its advantages because it attenuated the effects of the ozone hole, but transparency and, above all, being able to distinguish objects is always preferable. There was a lack of lucidity that would illuminate the path and allow one to orient oneself in the electoral turmoil with proselytizing campaigns to which the supposed future heroes were dedicated. Poor visibility– the forecast warned every day. That is why they tried to highlight the merits of those who made up the lists.
I did not want to be guided by misleading news and I interviewed survivors of the time who were confident that the mystery of the region would soon be revealed. They believed in preachers who had predicted a better future where laws would not be modified according to each person’s convenience. The oldest preserved vestiges of a happy past in which thunderous songs were not heard and the rulers were innocent. Every past era was better – they repeated with wisdom – memory preserves gratifying memories. Of course, they did not mention the thick, rising fog which made it feel like time was not passing.
Crises had always been overcome and this, surely, was one more in the long litca since colonial times. History was repeating a game of alternating between eratizing and privatizing policies according to the current interests. Luckily, Amertรกstica had excellent natural resources. The problem consisted of the administration’s failures and that latent threat that produced inexplicable events. I was beginning to understand what an economist was saying: -The crisis is a conjunctural state of little importance.
A certain amount of enthusiasm was needed, although later came the confusion that, little by little, invaded all the activities. A storm was brewing. The residents did not notice it since they were very busy filling out urgent forms and acquiring imported objects of all colors. Yes, a curious phenomenon was the presence of thousands of containers; luckily, of considerable dimensions that could be detected despite the thin air. A great achievement of modern globalization. Such distraction allowed us to put aside the pessimistic hypotheses generated by the parliamentary paralysis.
Projects bogged down – I read in one of the main morning newspapers because the different blocks that made up the chamber could not achieve a joint strategy. They could not agree: some wanted to repeal recently approved laws or take advantage of the absence of colleagues to establish new conditions. In this way, they could not meet.
Several proposals considered fundamental by the Executive were blocked, the same newspaper clarified. It was necessary to overcome differences so as not to lose the democratic spirit. There were very difficult meetings since the opposition asked for too many explanations and the others did not have precise answers –We only know what the media reports– they made excuses. For example, it was difficult to unmask those responsible for so many attacks. They always had the identikits on hand, just in case, but they got confused because there were so many similarities. It wasn’t easy: sometimes, they ended up distrustful of the victims.
“Judges are not detectives,” a famous legislator clarified with a didactic air.
“The fundamental thing was not to violate the secrecy of the summary,” the sympathetic politicians recalled.
Uncertainty and fog, two constants, took over the inhabitants who carried out their tasks like automatons. Thus their senses and ability to think began to atrophy. But they did not need to exercise that last faculty, everything was quite resolved. The problems that arose were normal; We do not forget that the human being is limited.
Amertastica could not be eternal. After reviewing the archives, the feeling of what could have been and the memory of the residents with their hopes and projects remains in my imagination. Perhaps one day its second founding will take place.
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PรNICO BURSรTIL
Las medidas extremas tomadas por las autoridades de Amertรกstica para evitar una corrida bancaria produjo el efecto contrario. La causa mรกs evidente fue que los inversores sospeยญ chaban que lo peor aรบn permanecรญa encubierto y que la salud patrimonial del mercado estaba muy debilitada.
-Atravesamos una circunstancia adversa- explicรณ el Primer Magistrado.
-Evitaremos la bancarrota de las instituciones y controlaremos la situaciรณn del sector financiero- asegurรณ un tecnรณcrata de reยญ nombre.
Asรญ, dieron a conocer drรกsticas decisiones que incluรญan crรฉdiยญtos de emergencia, rescate de empresas en quiebra e incentivos para productores medianos.
La velocidad y la virulencia con que se sucedรญan los hechos era impresionante. Con el fin de evitar el fuerte impacto, los establecimientos comerciales se interconectaron para ayudarse entre sรญ, pero la posibilidad de un estallido parecรญa inminente.
Los integrantes del gobierno no se ponรญan de acuerdo y se peleaban por imponer una lรญnea de acciรณn que salvara el propio beneficio. Aunque lo disimulaban muy bien, sรณlo favorecรญan a determinadas empresas que les concernรญan en particular.
Seamos pragmรกticos- era la consigna de los economistas mรกs especializados en transacciones de riesgo.
Los ciudadanos estaban atรณnitos. Habรญan pasado privaciones hasta conseguir algรบn crรฉdito que les permitiera subsistir. Sin embargo, sentรญan que todo tambaleaba porque ya no podrรญanpagar ni los altos impuestos ni los intereses que habรญan subido drรกsticamente en contra de las clรกusulas establecidas.
-En un perรญodo tan difรญcil como el actual, lo importante es no perder la confianza en las autoridades- alentaba un financista ilusionado en obtener alguna ganancia. Y agregรณ:
-Tengan paciencia. Estamos implementando una baterรญa de re cursos que nos salvarรก de la hecatombe.
Pero el deterioro de las condiciones socio-econรณmicas fue en aumento al mismo tiempo que la incertidumbre. Pocos hecho habรญan logrado trastornar tanto a los sufridos habitantes. Todo esperaban algรบn milagro o una simple seรฑal que los orientara frente a la desolaciรณn que invadรญa sus corazones. Les parecรญa que un ser extraรฑo los habรญa mutilado. Ya no eran personas, no podรญan pensar.
Despuรฉs de varios meses de desesperanza e impotencia, poco a poco, como autรณmatas, abandonaron sus viviendas y, en una larga caravana, en coche o a pie, se trasladaron a un paรญs vecino donde era posible vivir sin sobresaltos.
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STOCK MARKET PANIC
The extreme measures taken by the Amertรกstica authorities to avoid a bank run produced the opposite effect. The most obvious cause was that investors suspected that the worst was still under wraps and that the financial health of the market was very weak.
-We are going through an adverse circumstance- explained the First Magistrate.
“We will avoid the bankruptcy of institutions and control the situation in the financial sector,” said a renowned technocrat.
Thus, they announced drastic decisions that included emergency loans, rescue of bankrupt companies and incentives for medium-sized producers.
The speed and virulence with which the events occurred was impressive. In order to avoid the strong impact, commercial establishments interconnected to help each other, but the possibility of an explosion seemed imminentThe members of the government could not agree and fought to impose a line of action that would save their own benefit. Although they hid it very well, they only favored certain companies that concerned them in particular.
Let’s be pragmatic – was the slogan of the economists most specialized in risky transactions.
The citizens were stunned. They had gone through hardships until they obtained some credit that would allow them to survive. However, they felt that everything was faltering because they could no longer pay the high taxes or the interests that had risen drastically against the established clauses.
“In a period as difficult as the current one, the important thing is not to lose trust in the authorities,” encouraged a financier excited to make some profit. And he added:
-Be patient. We are implementing a battery of resources that will save us from the catastrophe.
But the deterioration of socio-economic conditions increased at the same time as uncertainty. Few events had managed to upset the suffering inhabitants so much. Everyone was waiting for some miracle or a simple sign that would guide them in the face of the desolation that invaded their hearts. It seemed to them that a strange being had mutilated them. They were no longer people, they could not think.
After several months of hopelessness and helplessness, little by little, like automatons, they abandoned their homes and, in a long caravan, by car or on foot, they moved to a neighboring country where it was possible to live without problems.
Nacido en 1930 en Connecticut, el rabino Marshall T. Meyer comenzรณ su lucha espiritual en Dartmouth College, donde tuvo la suerte de encontrar un maestro superlativo, Abraham Joshua Heschel, quizรกs el filรณsofo judรญo mรกs influyente de su tiempo. Mientras el rabino Meyer creaba una gran comunidad judรญa en Argentina, se convirtiรณ en uno de los pocos crรญticos abiertos de la represiva junta militar argentina que se apoderรณ del paรญs. Fue el รบnico no argentino designado para la Comisiรณn Nacional de Investigaciรณn de Desaparecidos. Ganador del premio mรกs alto de Argentina otorgado a un no ciudadano, fue una figura de renombre mundial que dinamizรณ el judaรญsmo estadounidense cuando regresรณ a Estados Unidos en 1985. Muriรณ en 1993.
Jane Tsay
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Born in 1930 in Connecticut, Rabbi Marshall T. Meyer began his spiritual struggle at Dartmouth College, where he was fortunate enough to find a superlative teacher, Abraham Joshua Heschel, perhaps the most influential Jewish philosopher of his time. While Rabbi Meyer was creating a large Jewish community in Argentina, he became one of the few outspoken critics of the repressive Argentine military junta that took over the country. He was the only non-Argentine appointed to the National Commission for the Investigation of the Disappeared. Recipient of Argentina’s highest award granted to a non-citizen, he was a figure of world renown who energized American Judaism when he returned the the United States in 1985. He died in 1993.
Jane Tsay
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Cรณmo puedo quejarme de pesadillas? ยฟPor quรฉ mi corazรณn no se llena de gratitud? Despuรฉs de todo, ninguno de mis hijos desapareciรณ. Mi esposa no desapareciรณ. No desaparecรญ. Sufro de insomnio; desde la adolescencia he padecido insomnio. (La mayor parte de mis pensamientos y meditaciones se concentran durante las horas nocturnas, en el silencio y la oscuridad). Es un pequeรฑo precio a pagar por haber vivido en Argentina durante veinticinco aรฑos (1959-1984) y ser activo en la lucha por los derechos humanos. movimiento allรญ durante ese perรญodo agotador. En esa lรญnea de siglo hubo quince presidentes, de los cuales sรณlo seis fueron elegidos en elecciones democrรกticas por el pueblo argentino. Siete presidentes representaron juntas militares que pisotearon no muy gradualmente los derechos civiles y humanos hasta llegar al punto mรกs bajo del infierno entre 1976 y 1983.
ยฟQuรฉ significa ser uno de los desaparecidos? ยฟQuiรฉn lo sabรญa? ยฟQuiรฉn hizo algo para ayudar? ยฟQuiรฉn eligiรณ a los que iban a desaparecer? ยฟHubo algรบn motivo para la desapariciรณn? ยฟLas desapariciones siguieron un patrรณn? ยฟCรณmo fue vivir en una ciudad altamente cosmopolita y sofisticada como Buenos Aires y escuchar en la escuela, en la universidad o en el trabajo que el niรฑo o la niรฑa (o el hombre o la mujer) que ayer estaba sentado a tu lado desapareciรณ anoche? ยฟCรณmo es entrar al dormitorio de tu ser querido y encontrarlo no allรญ? ยฟNi hoy, ni maรฑana, ni nunca? ยฟCรณmo es estar de luto sin un cadรกver que enterrar? ยฟCรณmo serรญa no tener la mรกs mรญnima nociรณn de lo que le pasรณ a tu hijo, o hija, o hermano, o hermana, o amigo?
Las tropas aliadas encontraron listas porque los nazis mantenรญan archivos completos de los prisioneros de los campos de concentraciรณn: quiรฉn fue incinerado y quiรฉn fue fusilado, quiรฉn fue gaseado y quiรฉn muriรณ de hambre. Pero en Argentina las รบnicas listas que existen son esas listas incompletas hechas por los padres y familiares y amigos que lenta y tortuosamente decidieron que no ayudaban con su silencio a sus hijos ni a sus seres queridos; que simplemente no era cierto lo que tantas instituciones y personas decรญan: “Serรก mejor que no presentes un recurso de hรกbeas corpus porque sรณlo le pondrรกs las cosas mรกs difรญciles a tu hijo”; o “No es prudente acudir a la policรญa, ni al Ministerio del Interior, ni al ejรฉrcito, ni a la marina, ni a la fuerza aรฉrea. Sรณlo torturarรกn mรกs a su hijo si lo hace. No haga escรกndalo. Ya veremos, dentro de unos dรญas volverรก a estar en casa”.
Quizรกs el peor dolor sea la duda persistente: ยฟSoy culpable de algo? ยฟMi hijo o hija estuvo involucrado en una banda terrorista? Despuรฉs de todo, todo el mundo dice: “Por algo serรก. En algo habrรก estado metido”. (Debe haber alguna razรณn. Debe haber estado involucrado en algo.) Respondes tu propia respuesta: “Eso es ridรญculo. Sรฉ perfectamente bien que no estuvo involucrado en ninguna organizaciรณn polรญtica”.
Por otro lado, los periรณdicos y muchos otros sugieren que los terroristas de extrema izquierda matan a sus propios miembros para que no revelen ningรบn secreto. Otros afirman que muchas personas se han hecho desaparecer y se han escapado a otros paรญses. “Pero mi hijo o mi hija no me harรญan eso. ยกNo estรกbamos distanciados!”
Conforme va pasando el tiempo, empiezas a conocer a otras personas que te cuentan historias similares. A medida que pasan los aรฑos, cada vez mรกs personas conocen a alguien que ha “desaparecido”. Si se leen los periรณdicos correctos (muy pocos) -“La Opiniรณn”, el diario inglรฉs “The Buenos Aires Herald”, “Nueva Presencia”-, los nombres de los desaparecidos comienzan a aparecer regularmente. Cada vez mรกs editoriales y cartas a El editor apareciรณ bajo el tรญtulo “Nombre oculto”. Poco a poco se hace evidente que la naciรณn se estรก convirtiendo en un infierno. La vida es insoportable para aquellos cuyos seres queridos han desaparecido. Los incรณmodos intentos de sus amigos por consolarlo a usted–nunca a costa de perder el sueรฑo o el dinero o arriesgar la posiciรณn-hacen el infierno todo lo mรกs insoportable.
Hay algรบn juez ocasional que intenta trabajar dentro del debido proceso legal, ese precioso proceso que es el รบltimo refugio de la jungla de la muerte totalitaria. Pero esos jueces tambiรฉn desaparecen. La gente dijo que รฉsta es una “guerra sucia” -como si alguna vez hubiera guerras “limpias”- y que la รบnica manera de acabar con el terrorismo es mediante el uso del terror. No hubo muchas voces que proclamaran que eso engendra terror; que cuando un Estado emplea medios que anulan el debido proceso legal, el Estado mismo se convierte en un instrumento de terror. Lo mรกs aterrador de todo fue que para la mayorรญa de los argentinos la vida seguรญa…El silencio era la consigna y la cobardรญa reinaba.
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CUANDO DECIR KADDISH-NO ESTร PERMITIDO
Quizรกs hayas leรญdo sobre las “madres locas”, mujeres que llevaban bordados en sus paรฑuelos blancos los nombres de sus hijos desaparecidos y que caminaban en silencio todos los jueves a las 15.30 horas, alrededor del obelisco de la Plaza de Mayo. Cuando las madres de Plaza de Mayo acudรญan a los servicios en mi sinagoga, muy pocas personas caminaban con ellas. Podrรญas contarlos con unos pocos dedos. Sabes lo que significa cuando alguien a quien amas llega tarde a casa. Trate de imaginar cรณmo se siente cuando ha estado esperando durante seis o siete aรฑos, esperando recibir un cadรกver sobre el cual decir Kaddish (la oraciรณn del doliente).
Un hombre entrรณ en mi estudio, se arremangรณ y me mostrรณ los nรบmeros. “ยฟPor esto me salvaron de Auschwitz? Rabino, tengo una pregunta halรกjica (legal). Se llevaron a mis dos hijos. ยฟTengo derecho a decir Kadish?” Respondรญ: “ยฟMe lo preguntas como rabino, halรกjicamente?” “Sรญ”, dijo. Me tenรญa agarrado por el cuello en ese momento. Le dije: “Si no puedes probar que estรกn muertos y sรณlo han pasado un par de meses, tienes que esperar”. Su respuesta angustiada: “ยฟCรณmo puedes pedirme que espere mรกs?” รl todavรญa estรก esperando.
BERLรN NO DEBE SER OLVIDADA DE NUEVO
Al hablar pรบblicamente contra las acciones del gobierno, sabรญa que estaba poniendo en peligro mi vida y la de mi familia. Por otro lado, sentรญ que estarรญa poniendo en peligro mi alma si permanecรญa en silencio. Cuando estuve en Argentina no tomรฉ posiciones por una corriente polรญtica especรญfica, sino que mi activismo emanรณ de las fuentes de mi propio judaรญsmo. Yo creรญa que si uno tomaba la Biblia en serio, simplemente no se podรญa ver suceder estas cosas y guardar silencio; no si eres un cristiano creyente o un judรญo creyente. Era parte integrante de mi propio judaรญsmo; Simplemente no podรญa callarme. Especialmente despuรฉs de saber lo que habรญa sucedido en Europa en los aรฑos del Holocausto.
Creo que yo, como rabino, no podrรญa perdonarme si repitiera el silencio de los rabinos de Europa en los aรฑos treinta. Los enemigos de la paz y la justicia siempre se basan en el miedo y en el silencio de la poblaciรณn. Hoy en Argentina hay demasiadas fuerzas que intentan bloquear la luz de la esperanza de un maรฑana de paz y creatividad. Cada uno de nosotros tiene la santa obligaciรณn de mantener viva al menos una pequeรฑa chispa de esta luz.
NO HAY PERDรN-NINGUNO
Las fuerzas armadas de Argentina afirmaron que sรณlo la historia puede juzgar y determinar con precisiรณn quiรฉn es responsable de los mรฉtodos injustos empleados y de las vidas inocentes perdidas. Este documento (que declara amnistรญa para los militares despuรฉs de la “guerra sucia”), hermanos y hermanas judรญos, es hilul hashem, una profanaciรณn y profanaciรณn del nombre de Dios. Aรบn mรกs escandaloso, los autores de este documento tienen la audacia de utilizar el nombre de Dios, sugiriendo que Dios perdone a los subversivos, sin mencionar nada sobre los asesinos que mataron a tantos inocentes. Este documento es una profanaciรณn del nombre de Dios y su publicaciรณn trae una impureza radical a esta tierra y a esta repรบblica.
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How can I complain of nightmares? Why isn’t my heart filled with gratitude? After ali, none of my children disappeared. My wife didn’t disappear. I didn’t disappear. I suffer from insomnia-since adolesยญcence I have been an insomniac. (Most of my thinking and meditating comes into focus during the night hours in the silence and darkness.) It is a small price to pay for having lived in Argentina for twenty-five years (1959-1984) and being active in the human rights movement there during that grueling period. That guarter of a century saw fifยญteen presidents, of whom only six were chosen in a democratic election by the people of Argentina. Seven presidents represented military junยญtas which not too gradually trampled on civil and human rights until the absolute nadir of hell was plumbed from 1976 until 1983.
What does it mean to be one of the disappeared? Who knew about it? Who did anything to help? Who chose the ones to disappear? Was there any reason for the disappearance? Did the disappearances follow a pattern? What was it like to live in a highly cosmopolitan, sophisticated city like Buenos Aires and to hear in school or at the university or at work that the boy or girl (or man or woman) who was sitting next to you yesterday disappeared last night? What is it like to walk into your loved one’s bedroom and find him or her not there; not today, not tomorrow, not ever? What is it like to be in mourning without a cadaver to bury? What would it be like not to have the slightest notion of what happened to your son, or daughter, or brother, or sister, or friend?
The allied troops found lists because the Nazis kept complete archives of the concentration camp inmates: who was cremated and who was shot, who was gassed and who died of starvation. But in Argentina the only lists that exist are those incomplete lists made by the parents and relatives and friends who slowly and torturously decided that they were not helping their children or loved ones with their silence; that what so many institutions and people were saying simply wasn’t true: “You’d better not present a writ of habeas corpus because you’ll only make things more difficult for your child;” or “It’s not wise to go to the Police, or the Ministry of Interior, or the Army, or the Navy, or the Air Force. They’ll only torture your child more if you do. Don’t make waves. You’ll see, in a few days he or she will be home again.”
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Perhaps the worst pain is the gnawing doubt: Am I guilty of someยญthing? Was my son or daughter involved in a terrorist gang? After al, everyone says: “Por algo serรก. En algo habrรก estado metido.” (There must be some reason. He must have been involved in something.) You shoot back your own answer: “That’s ridiculous. I know perfectly well that he was not involved in any political organization.”
On the other hand, the newspapers and many others suggest that the extreme left-wing terrorists kill their own members so that they won’t divulge any secrets. Still others claim that many people have made themselves disappear, sneaking off to other countries. “But my son or daughter wouldn’t do that to me. We were not estranged!”
As time goes by, you begin to meet other people who tell you simiยญlar stories. As the years pass, more and more people know someone who has “disappeared.” If you read the right newspapers (very few in number)- “La Opiniรณn,” the English daily “The Buenos Aires Herald,’ “Nueva Presencia”-the names of the disappeared begin to appear regularly. More and more editorials and letters to the editor appeared. under the byline “Name withheld” Slowly it becomes evident that the nation is turning into hell. Life is unbearable for those whose loved ones have disappeared. Awkward attempts by friends to console youยญ never at the cost of losing any sleep or money or risking one’s posiยญtion-make the hell all the more unbearable.
There is an occasional judge who tries to work within the due process of law, that precious process that is the last refuge from the jungle of totalitarian death. But those judges, too, disappear. The people told that this is a “dirty war”-as though there were ever “clean` wars-and that the only way to do away with terrorism is via the use of terror. There were not many voices proclaiming that engenders terror; that when a state employs means that abrogate the due process of law, the state itself becomes an instrument of terror. What was most frightening of all was that for most Argentines life went onโฆSilence was the watchword and cowardice reigned supreme.
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WHEN SAYING KADDISH-IS NOT PERMITTED
You may have read about the “mad mothers,” women who have the names of their missing sons and daughters embroidered on their white kerchiefs, and who walked in silence every Thursday at 3:30 P.M., around the obelisk in the Plaza de Mayo. When the mothers of the Plaza de Mayo carne to services at my synagogue, very few people were walking with them. You could count them on a few fingers. You know what it means when someone you love comes home late. Try to imagยญine how it feels when you have been waiting for six or seven years, waiting to receive a cadaver over which to say Kaddish (mourner’s prayer).
One man carne into my study, rolled up his sleeve, and showed me the numbers. “For this I was saved from Auschwitz? Rabbi, I have a halakhic (legal) question. They took my two sons. Do I have a right to say Kaddish?” l answered: “Are you asking me as a rabbi, halakhically?” “Yes,” he said. He had me by the throat at this point. I said: “If you can’t prove that they’re dead and it’s only been a couple of months, you’ve got to wait.” His anguished reply: “How can you ask me to wait any longer?” He is still waiting.
BERLIN MUST NOT RE FORGOTTEN
By speaking out publicly against the actions of the government, I knew that I was placing my life, and the life of my family, in jeopardy. On the other hand, I felt that I would be putting my soul in jeopardy if I stood silent. When I was in Argentina I didn’t take positions because of a specific political persuasion, but rather my activism emanated from the wellsprings of my own Judaism. If one was to take the Bible seriously, I believed, you just couldn’t watch these things happen and maintain silence; not if you’re a believing Christian or a believing Jew. I t was part and parcel of my own J Judaism; I just couldn’t shut up. Especially after knowing what had happened in Europe in the Holocaust years.
I believe that I, as a rabbi, could not forgive myself if I repeated the silence of the rabbis of Europe in the 1930s. The enemies of peace and justice always rely on fear and on the silence of the population. In Argentina today there are too many forces trying to block out the light of hope for a tomorrow of peace and creativity. Every one of us has the holy obligation to keep alive at least a small spark of this light.
NO FORGIVENESS-NONE
The armed forces of Argentina asserted that only history can accuยญrately judge and determine who is responsible for the unjust methods employed and the innocent lives lost. This document (declaring amnesty for the military after the “dirty war”), Jewish brothers and sisters, is hilul hashem, a desecration and profanation of the name of God. Even more outrageous, the authors of this document have the audacity to use the name of God-suggesting that God should forgive the subversives, without mentioning anything about the murderers that killed so many innocent individuals. This document is a profanaยญtion of the name of God and its publication brings a radical impurity to this earth and this republic.
Paula Varsavsky es escritora de ficciรณn, docente y periodista argentina. Vive en Buenos Aires. Sus obras de ficciรณn son las novelasย Nadie alzaba la vozย (Emecรฉ, 1994), publicada tambiรฉn en en Estados Unidos en traducciรณn al inglรฉs por Anne McLeanย No One Said a Wordย (ediciรณn de tapa dura Ontario Review Press, 2000; ediciรณn rรบstica y electrรณnica Wings Press, 2012),ย El resto de su vidaย (Mondadori, 2007) y la colecciรณn de cuentosย La libertad de los huรฉrfanosย (La mariposa y la iguana, 2022 y Lastarria y de Mora, 2023). En cuanto a no-ficciรณn publicรณย Las mil caras del autorย (EDUVIM, 2015, RIL Editores Chile 2016, RIL Editores Espaรฑa, 2018 y LยดHARMATTAN, 2023 traducida al francรฉs por Luis Dapeloย Les Mille visages de lยดauteur) que es una compilaciรณn de conversaciones con britรกnicos y estadounidenses. Ha entrevistado a a Joyce Carol Oates, Richard Ford, David Lodge, Hanif Kureishi, Edmund White, David Leavitt, Siri Hustvedt, Ali Smith, Esther Freud, William Boyd, Meir Shalev, Aharon Appelfeld, Nicole Brossard, Margaret Atwood, Graham Swift y E.L. Doctorow, entre muchos otros.
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Paula Varsavsky is an Argentine fiction writer, teacher and journalist. She lives in Buenos Aires. Her works are the novelsย Nadie alzaba la vozย (Emecรฉ, 1994), also published in the United States in English translation by Anne McLeanย No One Said a Wordย (Ontario Review Press, hardcover edition of 2000 and Wings Press, 2013 paperback and e-book edition).ย El resto de su vidaย (Mondadori, 2007) and the collection of stories La libertad de los huรฉrfanos (La mariposa y la iguana, Argentina, 2022 and Lastarria y de Mora Spain, 2023). Her non-fiction workย Las mil caras del autorย (EDUVIM, 2015, RIL Editores Chile 2016, RIL Editores Espaรฑa, 2018 y LยดHARMATTAN, 2023 translated into French by Luis Dapeloย Les Mille visages de lยดauteur)ย is a collection of conversations with British and American writers. She has interviewed a Joyce Carol Oates, Richard Ford, David Lodge, Hanif Kureishi, Edmund White, David Leavitt, Siri Hustvedt, Ali Smith, Esther Freud, William Boyd, Meir Shalev, Aharon Appelfeld, Nicole Brossard, Margaret Atwood, Graham Swift y E.L. Doctorow, among many others.
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“La libertad de los huรฉrfanos“
Hay un sueรฑo que tuve una gran cantidad de veces. Mi padre estaba vivo. Yo lo encontraba despuรฉs de pasar dieciocho aรฑos sin verlo. Papรก no se sorprendรญa ni se alegraba. Dirรญa que hasta me evitaba. El hecho de encontrarse conmigo parecรญa un problema para รฉl, no le generaba felicidad. Le reprochaba que no me hubiera buscado, que no se hubiera contactado conmigo durante tantos aรฑos. Papรก apenas me escuchaba. Estaba con su mujer, ella me miraba esquiva. Yola odiaba mรกs que nunca. Papรก estaba delicado de salud. Ella lo habรญa cuidado.
Pero a papรก lo habรญan enterrado, yo lo habรญa visto, argumentaba en mi sueรฑo. Habรญa observado cรณmo descendรญa el ataรบd, lo habรญamos cubierto con tierra. Ahรญ habรญa quedado solamente unos dรญas, me contestaban personas que, en el sueรฑo, no lograba reconocer.
Una variante del sueรฑo era que yo viajaba a Roma, donde mi padre habรญa vivido los รบltimos nueve aรฑos de su vida y, de alguna forma extraรฑa, mientras caminaba por la Piazza Navona, daba con su casa. Se trataba de un apartamento distinto del que รฉl habรญa tenido. El de mi sueรฑo tenรญa los techos mรกs bajos, se asemejaba a uno de Buenos Aires. Yo estaba furiosa porque no me habรญan invitado a hospedarme allรญ. ยกCรณmo podรญa ser que estuviera en la misma ciudad y que a รฉl no le importara!
Otra vez soรฑรฉ que lo encontraba despuรฉs de veinte aรฑos. Veinte aรฑos sin verlo. Lo habรญa llamado por telรฉfono deยญcenas de veces, no me atendรญa. Creรญa que quizรกs a travรฉs del e-mail hubiese podido ubicarlo. Sin tener en cuenta que, obviamente, en esos aรฑos pasados no existรญa el mail ยซClaro, si supiera su e-mail, si supiera su e-mailยป, pensaba en el sueรฑo. Me despertaba agotada por los esfuerzos denodados que habรญa hecho por encontrar a mi padre. Estaba cerca, varias veces habรญa estado cerca, pero no lograba dar con รฉl. Aquella vez, al levantarme, advertรญ que faltaban dos dรญas para que se cumplieran veinte aรฑos de su muerte. Sentรญa la presiรณn de mantener vivo su recuerdo. Sin embargo, me costaba mรกs. Cada aรฑo se alejaba mรกs.
Algunas veces, en mis sueรฑos, aparecรญa mi hermana y me pasaba algรบn dato acerca de รฉl. Ella sรญ habรญa logrado contactarlo. Yo me enfurecรญa porque no me habรญa pasado su telรฉfono con suficiente rapidez. Las respuestas de papรก, si lograba que me contestara algo, eran vagas, confusas, se le notaba abatido, sin interรฉs por verme.
En todos estos sueรฑos, papรก estaba mal de salud. Pero nunca me quedaba claro quรฉ tenรญa. Era inasible.
Papรก muriรณ cuando yo tenรญa doce aรฑos. Luego de que pasaron mรกs de veinte, ya no llevรฉ la cuenta.
Hoy es el Dรญa del Padre. De pronto advierto que hace mucho que no sueรฑo con รฉl, ni vivo ni muerto. Ya no me siento presionada por buscar un padre sustituto, ni lamento no poder festejarle. Probablemente descanse en paz mientras yo disfruto de la libertad de los huรฉrfanos.
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“An Orphan’s Freedom”
Thereโs a dream I used to have again and again. My father was alive. We hadnโt seen each other in eighteen years, and Iโd found him. Dad wasnโt surprised. Nor was he glad to see me. It felt like heโd been avoiding me. The fact that we were together again seemed problematic to himโhe wasnโt happy about it. I reproached him for not having looked for me, for not having contacted me all those years. Dad hardly listened to me. He was with his wife, who looked at me coldly. I hated her more than ever. Dad wasnโt in good health, and sheโd been taking care of him.
But my father had been buried, Iโd seen it with my own eyes. Iโd watched the coffin lowered before we covered it with earth. Heโd only been down there for a few days, they told me.
In another version of the dream I travelled to Rome, where my father had lived for the last nine years of his life. Strangely, as I walked around the Piazza Navona, I came upon his home, an apartment in Rome that was different from the one heโd actually lived in. The apartment in my dream had lower ceilings and looked like one youโd see in Buenos Aires. I was furious because they hadnโt asked me to stay with them. How could he not care I was in Rome?
In all these dreams Dad wasnโt doing well. But I never really understood what was wrong with him. It was hard to grasp.
Another time I dreamed Iโd found him after twenty years. Twenty years and I hadnโt seen him. Iโd called him dozens of times but heโd never answered. I wished email had existed back then. I figured it might have been a way to find him. โIf only I had his email, if only I had his email,โ I thought in the dream.
Iโd wake exhausted after tirelessly searching for my father in my dreams. I was close, several times I was close, but I never got to him. In two days, twenty years would have passed since his death. I felt I had to keep his memory alive, but it was getting harder and harder. Each year he slipped further away.
Some nights when I had the dream my sister shared information about my father with me. Sheโd been able to reach him. Iโd be furious with her because she hadnโt given me his phone number earlier. Dadโs replies, if I was able to get him to say anything, were vague, confusing. He seemed despondent, as though he wasnโt interested in seeing me.
Dad died when I was twelve years old. After more than twenty years had gone by I stopped keeping track. Itโs been a while since Iโve dreamed of him, dead or alive.
Today is Fatherโs Day. I donโt feel compelled to look for a surrogate father anymore, nor do I wish I could be with him today. Heโs probably resting in peace, while I enjoy an orphanโs freedom.
Anahรญ estaba segura de que no le convenรญa volver a salir con Damiรกn. Pero a pesar de habรฉrselo dejado bien claro, รฉl no hacรญa mรกs que mandarle e-mails contรกndole lo desesperado que estaba por ella. Una madrugada, luego de una noche de tormenta en la que apenas logrรณ conciliar el sueรฑo, ella le respondiรณ. A los quince minutos, Damiรกn la llamรณ por telรฉfono; enseguida combinaron para salir esa noche. La separaciรณn que habรญa impuesto Anahรญ un mes atrรกs habรญa terminado en forma abrupta: a partir de entonces volvieron a verse en esa rutina de espacios de tiempo indefinidos en los que รฉl lograba escaparse de su mujer.
Hacรญa tres aรฑos, el marido de Anahรญ habรญa muerto en un accidente de auto. Ella vivรญa sola con sus hijas, asรญ como Damiรกn convivรญa con su mujer y su hijo. Anahรญ trataba de quitarle peso al matrimonio de รฉl: ยซNo estรก casado legalยญmenteยป, pensaba intentado consolarse. Pero sabรญa que, en una pareja, los papeles no tenรญan ninguna importancia; รฉl era un padre de familia.
A ella le desesperaba corroborar que su cuerpo y su menยญte iban por carriles paralelos que le parecรญan imposibles de compatibilizar. Por un lado, no querรญa seguir con รฉl, sabรญa que la situaciรณn era peligrosa, como le habรญa dicho una amiยญga: ยซยฟQuรฉ sabรฉs cรณmo puede reaccionar la mujer? Vos sos la รบnica responsable de tus hijas, te ponรฉs en riesgoยป. Por otro lado, sentรญa una atracciรณn tremenda por รฉl; lo que mรกs le gustaba de la relaciรณn era el sexo.
En un intento renovado de comprender ese vรญnculo que la hacรญa sentir siempre desdichada, salvo en los momentos en que hacรญan el amor, creyรณ que compartir sus dilemas con mรกs amigos la ayudarรญa.
Un mediodรญa de enero, mientras sus hijas estaban en el club, se encontrรณ en un cafรฉ cercano a su trabajo con su amigo Gastรณn, un hรกbil periodista polรญtico que sabรญa definir con rapidez el perfil de una persona.
-Es raro eso de que salgan tambiรฉn los sรกbados -comentรณ con una leve sonrisa despuรฉs de escucharla con atenciรณn. Ante el silencio de Anahรญ, continuรณ–. Evidentemente, รฉl te ve a vos como una pareja. Pero no lo sos, porque estรก con la mina. El hecho de engancharse con una mina mรกs chica, como hizo Damiรกn con su mujer, tiene su atractivo. Durante un tiempo sos Dios. Ella te idealiza, es gratificante. El tema es que despuรฉs se vuelve aburrido. En su momento le debe haber gustado sexualmente. Supongo que se fija mucho en la estรฉtica. En vos debe haber encontrado alguien que estรก a la par, con quien puede compartir otros temas, inclusive con quien salir. Pero es probable que, si hoy en dรญa le decรญs que elija entre estar con vos o con ella, se quede con ella.
Gastรณn hizo una pausa.
-O sea, a ver si lo puedo explicar mejor: si le hacรฉs el planteo de que terminen la relaciรณn, va a actuar haciรฉndose el que aquรญ no pasa nada, que estรก todo igual.
Anahรญ le comentรณ que eso era exactamente lo que le habรญa sucedido. Sonรณ el celular de ella y atendiรณ. Sonriรณ. Gastรณn le guiรฑรณ un ojo para darle a entender que sabรญa de quiรฉn se trataba.
Gastรณn le advirtiรณ.
-Volvรฉ a planteรกrselo, pero con firmeza. โNo transรฉs nada intermedio. Que no te venga con promesas.
Y despuรฉs: -Buscรกte un tipo que no estรฉ casado -esto fue lo รบltiยญmo que le dijo.
El domingo siguiente, almorzรณ con una amiga en una canยญtina de Almagro:
-Sos su sostรฉn, รฉl puede conservar la relaciรณn con su mujer gracias a que vos estรกs ahรญ. Si no estuvieras, le seยญrรญa mucho mรกs difรญcil. Te lo digo porque lo vivรญ de los dos lados. A veces, despuรฉs de encamarme fantรกstico con un amante, volvรญa a mi casa y pensaba que, en realidad, estaba muy bien con mi marido. Al final, รฉl me dejรณ por una mina fea y aburrida, no sรฉ quรฉ le vio.
Anahรญ alternaba momentos en que lo amaba con otros en que lo detestaba.
ยซรl vuelve a un dramaยป, le asegurรณ otra amiga, casada y con cuatro hijos, alguien que sabรญa de quรฉ podรญa tratarse un mal matrimonio. Anahรญ recordรณ el tiempo en que su marido y ella discutรญan por cualquier tema, pero su pareja nunca habรญa llegado a convertirse en una pesadilla. Ya pasaron mรกs de tres aรฑos de su muerte, ยกquรฉ lejano parece!, pensรณ.
-Vos no, vos estรกs bien en tu casa con tus hijas. Tenรฉs una vida bastante placentera.
ยฟCreรฉs que soy una estรบpida? ยฟQuรฉ no me doy cuenta de que me cogรฉs cuando querรฉs? Ensayรณ las dos frases antes de encontrarse a cenar con Damiรกn unos dรญas mรกs tarde. No le habรญa dicho de ir a tomar un cafรฉ para disimular que se trataba de una nueva ruptura.
Pero aquella cena fue patรฉtica, comenzรณ con el planteo de ella, de que esta vez sรญ deberรญan poner fin a la relaciรณn.
Entonces รฉl le pidiรณ explicaciones. Ella habรญa pinchado un ravioli de verdura, que volรณ por el aire.
-Una impresentable, eso es lo que soy para vos -le contestรณ a Damiรกn mientras el raviol cayรณ sobre el mantel junto con la salsa blanca que tenรญa encima.
A Damiรกn empezรณ a sangrarle la nariz, la moza le alcanzรณ hielo. Tomรณ un cubito y lo sostuvo en una mano; con la otra, desplegรณ una servilleta blanca de algodรณn tipo sรกbana. Ella no atinรณ a ayudarlo, se mantuvo en silencio.
Sabรญa que รฉl jugaba con sus sentimientos. ยฟSe harรก otra vez el sorprendido?, se preguntรณ Anahรญ. La nariz habรญa dejado de sangrarle cuando รฉl intentรณ convencerle de que la querรญa. Que pensara lo que le estaba diciendo: asรญ no podรญan seguir, le retrucรณ ella.
Volviรณ a sangrarle la nariz. Y fue entonces que รฉl se puso a hablarle de su propio proceso. A Anahรญ le disgustรณ doblemente: por lo que habรญa sucedido en el paรญs y por el que รฉl trataba de inventarle. Me pide que permanezca cerca de รฉl en una situaciรณn que no tiene reglas, concluyรณ, pero prefiriรณ no decรญrselo. Segรบn Damiรกn, eso que ella le proponรญa se contradecรญa con su proceso interno.
De pronto ella vio que corrรญa una lรกgrima por su mejilla. Se posรณ sobre la sangre que todavรญa le quedaba alrededor de la nariz, llegรณ al mentรณn color rosa. Al fin cayรณ sobre el mantel. Ya hablamos de que no podemos seguir siendo una pareja -dijo entonces Damiรกn.
Ella dedujo que se referรญa a รฉl y a su mujer. La servilleta manchada seguรญa sobre la mesa hecha un bollo. ยกQuรฉ roja es la sangre!, pensรณ Anahรญ.
-ยกY nuestro hijo en el medio!-agregรณ.
Las lรกgrimas que le cayeron lograron conmoverla. Le tomรณ una mano, le acariciรณ lentamente una de sus mejillas hรบmedas.
รl le preguntรณ cuรกndo se volverรญan a ver. Anahรญ dudรณ un instante y siguiรณ uno de los tantos consejos que le habรญan dado sus amigos.
-Si en marzo te separรกs, avรญsame.
A principios de abril, cuando hacรญa un mes que sus hijas estaban encaminadas en primero y tercer grado y ella esยญtaba finalizando los detalles de una nueva producciรณn que lanzarรญan por televisiรณn, al mirar su celular, vio una llamada perdida: era de Damiรกn. No quiso prestarle atenciรณn ni desยญconcentrarse. Cuando estaba por salir de la oficina, รฉl volviรณ a llamar.
-Me separรฉ -fue loque dijo.
Conmovida, atinรณ a preguntarle dรณnde estaba viviendo, รฉl contestรณ que en su estudio de grabaciรณn. La invitรณ a cenar allรญ mismo disculpรกndose por no tener todavรญa una casa armada:
-Duermo en un colchรณn en el piso.
Anahรญ repasรณ mentalmente las personas que podrรญan cuiยญdar a sus hijas esa misma noche cuando fuera a verlo.
El lunes siguiente, Anahรญ le comentรณ a una compaรฑera de trabajo, que conocรญa su relaciรณn con Damiรกn, el รบltimo giro que habรญa dado su vรญnculo, lo bien que lo habรญan pasado juntos ese fin de semana.
-Bueno, se podrรญa decir que ustedes la hicieron como corresponde. Es cierto que antes eras su refugio secreto, pero ahora te usa para separarse. Ademรกs, no se sabe cuรกnto puede durar eso, digo, muchas vuelven, viene la gran reconciliaciรณn y otro hijo. Eso es un embole (1) ,yo lo pasรฉ, no te lo recomiendo -le dijo, dio media vuelta y empezรณ a caminar hacia el pasillo.
Anahรญ supuso que aquellas no eran mรกs que pavadas, preยญfiriรณ olvidar la advertencia. Solamente recordรณ el chicle que tenรญa su compaรฑera en la boca mientras le hablรณ.
Anahรญ was sure that it wasnโt a good idea to go out again with Damiรกn. But despite her having made that very clear, he persisted in sending her emails telling her how desperately he needed her. One morning at dawn, after a night of torment in which she could barely get to sleep, she responded to his emails. Fifteen minutes later, Damiรกn called her; immediately they made plans to go out that night. The separation that Anahi had imposed a month earlier had ended abruptly: from then on, they once again saw each other in a routine of indefinite time between when he was able to get away from his wife.
Three years earlier, Anahรญโs husband had died in an automobile accident. She lived alone with her daughters. Just to downplay his marriage: โHe isnโt legally married,โ she thought, trying to console herself. But she knew that, for a couple, the papers didnโt matter at all; he was the father of a family.
She tried desperately to make sure that her body and her mind were on parallel tracks which seemed impossible to reconcile. On the one hand, she didnโt want to go on with him; she knew that the situation was dangerous, as a friend had told her: โHow do you know how the woman will react? You are the only one responsible for your daughters, you are putting yourself at risk.โ On the other hand, she felt a tremendous attraction for him; what she most liked in the relationship was the sex.
In a renewed attempt to understand that connection that always made her feel wretched, except in the moments when they made love, she believed that sharing her dilemma with more friends would help her.
On a January noontime, while her daughters were at the club, she found herself in a cafรฉ near her work with her friend Gastรณn, a shrewd journalist who knew how to rapidly define someoneโs profile.
โItโs odd that you also go out on Saturdays,โ he commented with a slight smile after listening to her attentively. With Anahรญโs silence, he continued. โEvidently, he sees the two of you as a couple.โBut you arenโt, because he is with herโ. The fact of hooking up with this younger gal, as Damiรกn did with his wife, has its attraction. For a time, you are God. She idealizes you, it’s gratifying. What happens is that later, you get bored. At the time, he must have liked the sex. I suppose he pays a lot of attention to aesthetics. In you, Anahรญ, he ought to have found someone who is on par with him, with whom he can share other topics, including who to go out with. But it is probablethat, if these days you tell him to choose between being with you or her, he will stay with her.โ
Gastรณn paused.
โWell, letโs see if I can explain it better: if you propose to him that you both end the relationship, he will act as if nothing had happened to him, that everything is just the same.โ
Anahรญ commented that that was exactly what had happened to her. The cell phone rang, and she answered it Gastรณn winked an eye to let her understand that he knew who the subject was.
Gastรณn warned her:
โPropose it to him again, but firmly. Donโt compromise to anything in between. Be sure that he doesnโt come to you with promises.โ
And then:
โLook for a guy who isnโt marriedโโthat was the last thing he said to her.
The following Sunday, she had lunch with a friend in a cantina in Almagro:
ย ย โYou are his support; he can keep the relationship with his wife, thanks to the fact that you are there. If you werenโt in the picture, it would be much more difficult for him. Iโm telling you this because I have lived both sides. At times, after having had fantastic sex with a lover, I returned home and I thought that, really, I was doing very well with my husband. Finally, he left me for an ugly and boring gal. I donโt know what he saw in her.โ
Anahรญ went back and forth between moments in which she loved him with others in which she detested him.
โHe returns to a drama,โ a friend assured, who was married and had four children, someone who knew what a bad marriage could be like. Anahรญ remembered the time when she and her husband argued about anything, but her relationship never became a nightmare. It had already been three years since his death, how far away it seemed, she thought.
โYou are not, you are doing well in your home with your daughters. You have a rather pleasant life.โ
Do you think Iโm stupid?โ That I donโt understand you fuck me when you want to?ย She tried out the two phrases before meeting Damiรกn for supper a few days later. She hadnโt suggested they have coffeeto hide that the topic was a new breakup.
But that dinner was pathetic. It began with her proposal, that this time, yes, they ought to put an end to the relationship. Then he asked her for explanations. She had poked a piece of vegetable ravioli that flew through the air.
โA liability, that is what I am for you.โ She answered to Damiรกn, while the ravioli fell onto the tablecloth together with the white sauce on it.
Damiรกnโs nose began to bleed and the waitress brought him some ice. He took a small cube and held it in one hand; with the other, he unfolded a white napkin made of bedsheet cotton. She managed not to help him; she kept silent.
She knew that he was playing with her feelings. โWill he once again act as if he were surprised.โ Anahรญ wondered. His nose had stopped bleeding, when he tried to convince her that he loved her.
ย ย What did he think he was telling her; they canโt go on like this, she retorted. His nose began to bleed again. And it was then that he began to speak to her about his own proceso, his inner struggle.Anahรญ was doubly irritated by him: for what had happened in the country and for what he was trying to concoct for her. He asks me to stay close to him in a situation that doesnโt have rules, she concluded, but she preferred not to tell him that. According to Damiรกn, what she proposed contradicted his own internal struggle. All of a sudden, she saw a tear on his cheek. It settled on the blood that still remained around his nose; it reached his chin in rose color. Finally, it fell on the tablecloth.
โWeโve already talked about how we canโt continue being a couple,โ Damiรกn then said.
She deduced that he was referring to him and his wife. The stained napkin, made into a ball, remained on the table. How red blood is! Anahรญ thought.
โAnd our son in the middle of it!โ he added.
The tears that fell from him succeeded in moving her. She took his hand; she caressed slowly one of his damp cheeks.
He asked when they would see each other again. Anahรญ was doubtful for an instant and continued with one of so many pieces of advice that her friends had given her.
โIn March, if you separate, let me know.โ
At the beginning of April, when her daughters were a month into their first and third grades, and she was finalizing a new project that they would launch on television, looking at her cell phone, she saw a missed call: it was from Damiรกn. She didnโt want to pay attention or lose her concentration. When she was about to leave the office, he called again.
ย ย ย ย ย โI have separated,” is what he said. ย ย ย ย
ย ย ย ย ย ย Moved, she decided to ask him where he was living. He answered that he was in his recording studio. He invited her to have supper right there, apologizing for not yet having a full-fledged home:
โI sleep on a mattress on the floor.โ
Anahรญ thought over the people who could take care of her daughters that night, when she went to see him.
The following Monday, Anahรญ commented to a coworker, who knew about her relationship with Damiรกn, the latest turn that her linkup had taken, how well they had spent that weekend together.
โWell, you could say that you two did what was called for. Itโs certain that beforehand you were his secret refuge, but now heโs using you in his separation. Also, you donโt know how long that can last, I mean, many return, the great reconciliation comes and another child. That is a bummer. I went through it, I donโt recommend it to you,โ she said, made a half turn and began to walk toward the hallway.
Anahรญ supposed that those were nothing more than bits of nonsense. She preferred to forget the warning. She only remembered the chewing gum that her coworker had in her mouth while she was talking to her.
Translated by Stephen A. Sadow, with the help of the author
Osvaldo Dragรบn naciรณ en Entre Rรญos, Argentina, de padres judรญos. Se trasladaron a Buenos Aires donde, Dragรบn iniciรณ estudios universitarios, pero los abandonรณ para dedicarse al teatro. Se uniรณ al movimiento de Teatro Independiente que se contraponรญa en aquellos aรฑos al teatro profesional e inspiraba a una nueva generaciรณn de dramaturgos que iba a incluir nuevas voces como las de Dragรบn y Carlos Gorostiza. En ese medio se vio atraรญdo por los propรณsitos del teatro experimental. En 1952 Dragรบn se uniรณ al Centro de Estudios de Arte Dramรกtico Fray Mocho. Conociรณ allรญ las ideas y teorรญas de Bertolt Brecht, y creรณ una versiรณn en espaรฑol de ยซMadre Corajeยป (1954) de este eminente pero controvertido dramaturgo alemรกn. Estrenรณ con el Grupo Fray Mocho su primera obra dramรกtica, ยซLa peste viene de Melosยป (1956), pieza basada en el golpe de estado que en 1954, derrocรณ al presidente de Guatemala, Jacobo Arbenz. Dragรบn siguiรณ produciendo obras de teatro que suscitaban polรฉmicas en la Argentina, notablemente ยซMilagro en el mercado viejoยป,1962. Su devociรณn al arte teatral motivรณ a Dragรบn a fundar la Comedia de Campana en 1969. Este teatro ha representado muchas de sus obras: ยซEl jardรญn del infiernoยป (1975), ยซEl amasijoยป (1984), ยซHistorias para ser contadasยป (1985) y ยซLos de la mesa 10ยป (1985). El tรฉrmino ยซmelodrama socialยป ha sido asociado con el teatro de Dragรบn. En 1980, aprovechando una nueva actitud menos represiva ante el teatro por parte de los miembros de la dictadura militar (1976โ1983), Dragรบn organizรณ a sus colegas de teatro para fundar un nuevo teatro de improvisaciones, el Teatro Abierto de Argentina. Este teatro abriรณ sus puertas en junio de 1981, estrenando, entre otras obras, ยซMi obelisco y yoยป, de Dragรบn. รste vendrรญa a ser un triunfo empaรฑado en parte por el asalto por bomba incendiaria al teatro, una semana despuรฉs de su inauguraciรณn. El papel del Teatro Abierto como fuente de obras de resistencia ante la represiรณn gubernamental se cifra en el tรญtulo de la temporada de 1984, el Teatrazo, o sea, ataque por teatro. Dragรบn mรกs tarde ocupรณ otros cargos importantes nacionales; entre ellos, Director del Teatro Nacional Cervantes en la Argentina desde 1996 hasta su muerte en 1999. Se ha afirmado que el teatro contemporรกneo argentino se fundamenta en la dramaturgia de Osvaldo Dragรบn.
Osvaldo Dragรบn was born in Entre Rรญos, Argentina, to Jewish parents. They moved to Buenos Aires where Dragรบn began university studies, but abandoned them to dedicate himself to theater. He joined the Independent Theater movement that was opposed to professional theater in those years and inspired a new generation of playwrights that was going to include new voices such as those of Dragรบn and Carlos Gorostiza. In that environment he was attracted by the purposes of experimental theater. In 1952 Dragรบn joined the Fray Mocho Dramatic Art Study Center. There he learned about the ideas and theories of Bertolt Brecht, and created a Spanish version of “Mother Courage” (1954) by this eminent but controversial German playwright. With the Grupo Fray Mocho he premiered his first dramatic work, “The Plague Comes from Melos” (1956), a piece based on the coup d’รฉtat that in 1954 overthrew the president of Guatemala, Jacobo Arbenz. Dragรบn continued to produce plays that sparked controversy in Argentina, notably “Miracle in the Old Market”, 1962. His devotion to theatrical art motivated Dragรบn to found the Comedia de Campana in 1969. This theater has performed many of his works: “The Garden of Hell” (1975), “El amasijo” (1984), “Stories to be told” (1985) and “Those at Table 10” (1985). The term “social melodrama” has been associated with Dragรบn’s theater. In 1980, taking advantage of a new, less repressive attitude toward theater on the part of members of the military dictatorship (1976โ1983), Dragรบn organized his theater colleagues to found a new improvisation theater, the Teatro Abierto de Argentina. This theater opened its doors in June 1981, premiering, among other works, โMy Obelisk and Iโ by Dragรบn. This would be a triumph marred in part by the firebomb attack on the theater, a week after its inauguration. The role of the Open Theater as a source of works of resistance to government repression is found in the title of the 1984 season, Teatrazo, that is, attack for theater. Dragรบn later held other important national positions; among them, Director of the Cervantes National Theater in Argentina from 1996 until his death in 1999. It has been stated that contemporary Argentine theater is based on the dramaturgy of Osvaldo Dragรบn.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ Amigos, la tercera historia vamos a contarla asรญโฆ
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Asรญ como nos la contaron esta tarde a nosotros.
ACTRIZ โ Es la ยซHistoria del hombre que se convirtiรณ en perroยป.
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Empezรณ hace dos aรฑos, en el banco de una plaza. Allรญ, seรฑorโฆ donde usted trataba hoy de adivinar el secreto de una hoja.
ACTRIZ โ Allรญ, donde extendiendo los brazos apretamos al mundo por la cabeza y los pies, y le decimos: ยกsuena, acordeรณn, suena!
ACTOR 2ยบ โ Allรญ le conocimos. (Entra el Actor 1ยบ.) Eraโฆ (lo seรฑala) โฆ asรญ como lo ven, nada mรกs. Y estaba muy triste.
ACTRIZ โ Fue nuestro amigo. รl buscaba trabajo, y nosotros รฉramos actores.
ACTOR 3ยบ โ รl debรญa mantener a su mujer, y nosotros รฉramos actores.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ รl soรฑaba con la vida, y despertaba gritando por la noche. Y nosotros รฉramos actores.
ACTRIZ โ Fue nuestro amigo, claro. Asรญ como lo venโฆ (Lo seรฑala.) Nada mรกs.
TODOSโโ ยกY estaba muy triste!
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Pasรณ el tiempo. El otoรฑoโฆ
ACTOR 2ยบ โ El veranoโฆ
ACTRIZ โ El inviernoโฆ
ACTOR 3ยบ โ La primaveraโฆ
ACTOR 1ยบ โ ยกMentira! Nunca tuve primavera.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ El otoรฑoโฆ
ACTRIZ โ El inviernoโฆ
ACTOR 3ยบ โ El verano. Y volvimos. Y fuimos a visitarlo, porque era nuestro amigo.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ Y preguntamos: ยฟEstรก bien? Y su mujer nos dijoโฆ
ACTRIZ โ No sรฉโฆ
ACTOR 3ยบ โ ยฟEstรก mal?
ACTRIZ โ No sรฉ.
ACTORES 2ยบ y 3ยบ โ ยฟDรณnde estรก?
ACTRIZ โ En la perrera.
(Actor 1ยบ en cuatro patas.)
ACTORES 2ยบ y 3ยบ โ ยกUhhh!
ACTOR 3ยบ โ (Observรกndolo.) Soy el director de la perrera, y esto me parece fenomenal. Llegรณ ladrando como un perro (requisito principal) y si bien conserva el traje, es un perro, a no dudar.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ (Tartamudeando.) S-s-soy el v-veter-r-inario, y esto-to-to es c-claro p-para mรญ. Aun-que p-parezca un ho-hombre, es un p-pe-perro el q-que estรก aquรญ.
ACTOR 1ยบ โ (Al pรบblico.) Y yo, ยฟquรฉ les puedo decir? No sรฉ si soy hombre o perro. Y creo que ni siquiera ustedes podrรกn decรญrmelo al final. Porque todo empezรณ de la manera mรกs corriente. Fui a una fรกbrica a buscar trabajo. Hacรญa tres meses que no conseguรญa nada, y fui a buscar trabajo.
ACTOR 3ยบ โ ยฟNo leyรณ el letrero? ยซNO HAY VACANTESยป.
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Sรญ, lo leรญ. ยฟNo tiene nada para mรญ?
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Si dice ยซNo hay vacantesยป, no hay.
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Claro. ยฟNo tiene nada para mรญ?
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Ni para usted, ni para el ministro.7
ACTOR 1ยบ โ ยกAhรก! ยฟNo tiene nada para mรญ?
ACTOR 3ยบ โ ยกNO!
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Tornero.
ACTOR 3ยบ โ ยกNO!
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Mecรกnico.
ACTOR 3ยบ โ ยกNO!
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Sโฆ
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Nโฆ
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Rโฆ
ACTOR 2ยบ โ (Tartamudeando.) S-s-soy el v-veter-r-inario, y esto-to-to es c-claro p-para mรญ. Aun-que p-parezca un ho-hombre, es un p-pe-perro el q-que estรก aquรญ.
ACTOR 1ยบ โ (Al pรบblico.) Y yo, ยฟquรฉ les puedo decir? No sรฉ si soy hombre o perro. Y creo que ni siquiera ustedes podrรกn decรญrmelo al final. Porque todo empezรณ de la manera mรกs corriente. Fui a una fรกbrica a buscar trabajo. Hacรญa tres meses que no conseguรญa nada, y fui a buscar trabajo.
ACTOR 3ยบ โ ยฟNo leyรณ el letrero? ยซNO HAY VACANTESยป.
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Sรญ, lo leรญ. ยฟNo tiene nada para mรญ?
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Si dice ยซNo hay vacantesยป, no hay.
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Claro. ยฟNo tiene nada para mรญ?
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Ni para usted, ni para el ministro.7
ACTOR 1ยบ โ ยกAhรก! ยฟNo tiene nada para mรญ?
ACTOR 3ยบ โ ยกNO!
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Tornero.
ACTOR 3ยบ โ ยกNO!
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Mecรกnico.
ACTOR 3ยบ โ ยกNO!
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Sโฆ
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Nโฆ
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Rโฆ
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Nโฆ
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Fโฆ
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Nโฆ
ACTOR 1ยบ โ ยกSereno! ยกSereno! ยกAunque sea de sereno!
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Nโฆ
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Fโฆ
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Nโฆ
ACTOR 1ยบ โ ยกSereno! ยกSereno! ยกAunque sea de sereno!
ACTRIZ โ (Como si tocara un clarรญn.) ยกTutรบ, tu-tu-tรบ! ยกEl patrรณn! (Los Actores 2ยบ y 3ยบ hablan por seรฑas)
ACTOR 3ยบ โ (Al pรบblico.) El perro del sereno, seรฑores, habรญa muerto la noche anterior, luego de veinticinco aรฑos de lealtad.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ Era un perro muy viejo.
ACTRIZ โ Amรฉn.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ (Al Actor 1ยบ.) ยฟSabe ladrar?
ACTOR 1ยบ โTornero.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ ยฟSabe ladrar?
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Mecรกnico.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ ยฟSabe ladrar?
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Albaรฑil.
ACTORES 2ยบ y 3ยบ โ ยกNO HAY VACANTES!
ACTOR 1ยบ โ (Pausa.) ยกGuauโฆ guauโฆ!
ACTOR 2ยบ โ Muy bien, lo felicitoโฆ
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Le asignamos diez pesos diarios de sueldo, la casilla y la comida.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ Como ven, ganaba diez pesos mรกs que el perro verdadero.
ACTRIZ โ Cuando volviรณ a casa me contรณ del empleo conseguido. Estaba borracho.
ACTOR 1ยบ โ (A su mujer.) Pero me prometieron que apenas un obrero se jubilara, muriera o fuera despedido me darรญan su puesto. ยกDivertite, Marรญa, divertite! ยกGuauโฆ, guauโฆ! ยกDivertite, Marรญa, divertite!
ACTORES 2ยบ y 3ยบ โ ยกGuauโฆ, guauโฆ! ยกDivertite, Marรญa, divertite!
ACTRIZ โ Estaba borracho, pobreโฆ
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Y a la otra noche empecรฉ a trabajarโฆ (Se agacha en cuatro patas.)
ACTOR 2ยบ โ ยฟTan chica le queda la casilla?
ACTOR 1ยบ โ No puedo agacharme tanto.
ACTOR 3ยบ โ ยฟLe aprieta aquรญ?
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Sรญ.
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Bueno, pero vea, no me diga ยซsรญยป. Tiene que empezar a acostumbrarse. Dรญgame: ยกGuauโฆguau!
ACTOR 2ยบ โ ยฟLe aprieta aquรญ? (El Actor 1ยบ no responde.) ยฟLe aprieta aquรญ?
ACTOR 1ยบ โ ยกGuauโฆ guauโฆ!
ACTOR 2ยบ โ Y buenoโฆ (Sale.)
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Pero esa noche lloviรณ, y tuve que meterme en la casilla.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ (Al Actor 1ยบ.) Ya no le aprietaโฆ
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Y estรก en la casilla.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ (Al Actor 1ยบ.) ยฟVio cรณmo uno se acostumbra a todo?
ACTRIZ โ Uno se acostumbra a todoโฆ
ACTORES 2ยบ y 3ยบ โ Amรฉnโฆ
ACTRIZ โ Y รฉl empezรณ a acostumbrarse.
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Entonces, cuando vea que alguien entra, me grita: ยกGuauโฆ guau! A verโฆ
ACTOR 1ยบ โ (El Actor 2ยบ pasa corriendo.) ยกGuauโฆ guauโฆ! (El Actor 2ยบ pasa sigilosamente. ยกGuauโฆ guauโฆ! (El Actor 2ยบ pasa agachado.) ยกGuauโฆ guauโฆ guauโฆ! (Sale.)
ACTOR 3ยบ โ (Al Actor 2ยบ.) Son diez pesos por dรญa extras en nuestro presupuestoโฆ
ACTOR 2ยบ โ ยกMmm!
ACTOR 3ยบ โ โฆpero la aplicaciรณn que pone el pobre, los mereceโฆ
ACTOR 2ยบ โ ยกMmm!
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Ademรกs, no come mรกs que el muertoโฆ
ACTOR 2ยบ โ ยกMmm!
ACTOR 3ยบ โ ยกDebemos ayudar a su familia!
ACTOR 2ยบ โ ยกMmm! ยกMmm! ยกMmm! (Salen.)
ACTRIZ โ Sin embargo, yo lo veรญa muy triste, y trataba de consolarlo cuando รฉl volvรญa a casa. (Entra Actor 1ยบ.) ยกHoy vinieron visitasโฆ!
ACTOR 1ยบ โ ยฟSรญ?
ACTRIZ โ Y de los bailes en el club, ยฟte acordรกs?
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Sรญ.
ACTRIZ โ ยฟCuรกl era nuestro tango?
ACTOR 1ยบ โ No sรฉ.
ACTRIZ โ ยกCรณmo que no! ยซPercanta que me amurasteโฆยป (El Actor 1ยบ estรก en cuatro patas.) Y un dรญa me trajiste un clavelโฆ (Lo mira, y queda horrorizada.) ยฟQuรฉ estรกs haciendo?
ACTOR 1ยบ โ No te iba a morderโฆ Te iba a besar, Marรญaโฆ
ACTRIZ โ ยกAh! yo creรญa que me ibas a morderโฆ (Sale. Entran los Actores 2ยบ y 3ยบ.)
ACTOR 2ยบ โ Por supuestoโฆ
ACTOR 3ยบ โ โฆa la maรฑana siguienteโฆ
ACTORES 2ยบ y 3ยบ โ Debiรณ volver a buscar trabajo.
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Recorrรญ varias partes, hasta que en unaโฆ
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Vea, รฉsteโฆ no tenemos nada. Salvo queโฆ
ACTOR 1ยบ โ ยฟQuรฉ?
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Anoche muriรณ el perro del sereno.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ Tenรญa treinta y cinco aรฑos, el pobreโฆ
ACTORES 2ยบ y 3ยบ โ ยกEl pobreโฆ!
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Y tuve que volver a aceptar.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ Eso sรญ, le pagรกbamos quince pesos por dรญa. (Los Actores 2ยบ y 3ยบ dan vueltas.) ยกHmm! ยกHmmmโฆ! ยกHmmmโฆ!
ACTORES 2ยบ y 3ยบ โ ยกAceptado! ยกQue sean quince! (Salen.)
ACTRIZ โ (Entra.) Claro que 450 pesos no nos alcanza para pagar el alquilerโฆ
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Mira, como yo tengo la casilla, mudate vos a una pieza con cuatro o cinco muchachas mรกs, ยฟeh?
ACTRIZ โ No hay otra soluciรณn. Y como no nos alcanza tampoco para comerโฆ
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Mira, como yo me acostumbrรฉ al hueso, te voy a traer la carne a vos, ยฟeh?
ACTORES 2ยบ y 3ยบ โ (Entrando.) ยกEl directorio accediรณ!
ACTOR 1ยบ y ACTRIZ โ El directorio accediรณโฆ ยกLoado sea! (Salen los Actores 2ยบ y 3ยบ.)
ACTOR 1ยบ โ Yo ya me habรญa acostumbrado. La casilla me parecรญa mรกs grande. Andar en cuatro patas no era muy diferente de andar en dos. Con Marรญa nos veรญamos en la plazaโฆ (Va hacia ella.) Porque vos no podรฉs entrar en mi casilla; y como yo no puedo entrar en tu piezaโฆ Hasta que una nocheโฆ
ACTRIZ โ Paseรกbamos. Y de repente me sentรญ malโฆ
ACTOR 1ยบ โ ยฟQuรฉ te pasa?
ACTRIZ โ Tengo mareos.
ACTOR 1ยบ โ ยฟPor quรฉ?
ACTRIZ โ (Llorando.) Me pareceโฆ que voy a tener un hijoโฆ
ACTOR 1ยบ โ ยฟY por eso lloras?
ACTRIZ โ ยกTengo miedoโฆ tengo miedo!
ACTOR 1ยบ โPero, ยฟpor quรฉ?
ACTRIZ โ ยกTengo miedoโฆ tengo miedo! ยกNo quiero tener un hijo!
ACTOR 1ยบ โ ยฟPor quรฉ, Marรญa? ยฟPor quรฉ?
ACTRIZ โ Tengo miedoโฆ que seaโฆ (Musita ยซperroยป. El Actor 1ยบ la mira aterrado, y sale corriendo y ladrando. Cae al suelo. Ella se pone de pie.) ยกSe fueโฆ se fue corriendo! A veces se paraba, y a veces corrรญa en cuatro patasโฆ
ACTOR 1ยบ โ ยกNo es cierto, no me paraba! ยกNo podรญa pararme! ยกMe dolรญa la cintura si me paraba! ยกGuauโฆ! Los coches se me venรญan encimaโฆ La gente me mirabaโฆ (Entran los Actores 2ยบ y 3ยบ.) ยกVรกyanse! ยฟNunca vieron un perro?
ACTOR 2ยบ โ ยกEstรก loco! ยกLlamen a un mรฉdico! (Sale.)
ACTOR 3ยบ โ ยกEstรก borracho! ยกLlamen a un policรญa! (Sale.)
ACTRIZ โ Despuรฉs me dijeron que un hombre se apiadรณ de รฉl, y se le acercรณ cariรฑosamente.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ (Entra.) ยฟSe siente mal, amigo? No puede quedarse en cuatro patas. ยฟSabe cuรกntas cosas hermosas hay para ver, de pie, con los ojos hacia arriba? A ver, pรกreseโฆ Yo lo ayudoโฆ Vamos, pรกreseโฆ
ACTOR 1ยบ โ (Comienza a pararse, y de repente.) ยกGuauโฆ guauโฆ! (Lo muerde.) ยกGuauโฆ guauโฆ! (Sale.)
ACTOR 3ยบ โ (Entra.) En fin, que cuando, despuรฉs de dos aรฑos sin verlo, le preguntamos a su mujer ยซยฟCรณmo estรกยป, nos contestรณโฆ
ACTRIZ โ No sรฉ.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ ยฟEstรก bien?
ACTRIZ โ No sรฉ.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ ยฟEstรก mal?
ACTRIZ โ No sรฉ.
ACTORES 2ยบ y 3ยบ โ ยฟDรณnde estรก?
ACTRIZ โ En la perrera.
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Y cuando venรญamos para acรก, pasรณ al lado nuestro un boxeadorโฆ
ACTOR 2ยบ โ Y nos dijeron que no sabรญa leer, pero que eso no importaba porque era boxeador.
ACTOR 3ยบ โ Y pasรณ un conscriptoโฆ
ACTRIZ โ Y pasรณ un policรญaโฆ
ACTOR 2ยบ โ Y pasaronโฆ y pasaronโฆ y pasaron ustedes. Y pensamos que tal vez podrรญa importarles la historia de nuestro amigoโฆ
ACTRIZ โ Porque tal vez entre ustedes haya ahora una mujer que piense: ยซยฟNo tendrรฉโฆ no tendrรฉโฆ?ยป (Musita: ยซperroยป.)
ACTOR 3ยบ โ O alguien a quien le hayan ofrecido el empleo del perro del serenoโฆ
ACTRIZ โ Si no es asรญ, nos alegramos.
ACTOR 2ยบ โ Pero si es asรญ, si entre ustedes hay alguno a quien quieran convertir en perro, como a nuestro amigo, entoncesโฆ. Pero bueno, entonces esaโฆ ยกesa es otra historia!
ACTOR 2nd โ Friends, we are going to tell the third story like thisโฆ
3rd ACTOR โ Just as they told it to us this afternoon.
ACTRESS โ It is the “Story of the man who became a dog.”
ACTOR 3 โ It started two years ago, on a bench in a square. There, sirโฆ where today you were trying to guess the secret of a leaf.
ACTRESS โ There, where by extending our arms we squeeze the world by the head and feet, and we say: play, accordion, play!
ACTOR 2nd โ We met him there. (The 1st Actor enters.) It wasโฆ (points to it)โฆ just as you see it, nothing more. And I was very sad.
ACTRESS โ He was our friend. He was looking for work, and we were actors.
3rd ACTOR โ He had to support his wife, and we were actors.
ACTOR 2nd โ He dreamed of life, and woke up screaming at night. And we were actors.
ACTRESS โ He was our friend, of course. Just as you see itโฆ (Points to it.) Nothing more.
EVERYONEโโ And I was very sad!
3rd ACTOR โ Time passed. Fallโฆ
ACTOR 2nd โ Summerโฆ
ACTRESS โ Winterโฆ
3rd ACTOR โ Springโฆ
1ST ACTOR โ Lie! I never had spring.
ACTOR 2nd โ Autumnโฆ
ACTRESS โ Winterโฆ
3rd ACTOR โ Summer. And we came back. And we went to visit him, because he was our friend.
ACTOR 2nd โ And we ask: Is it okay? And his wife told usโฆ
ACTRESS โ I don’t knowโฆ
3rd ACTOR โ Is it wrong?
ACTRESS โ I don’t know.
ACTORS 2nd and 3rd โ Where is he?
ACTRESS โ In the kennel.
(1st Actor on all fours.)
2nd and 3rd ACTORS โ Uhhh!
ACTOR 3: (Watching him.) I’m the director of the kennel, and I think this is phenomenal. He arrived barking like a dog (main requirement) and although he still has his suit, he is a dog, no doubt.
ACTOR 2nd โ (Stuttering.) I-I-I’m the v-veterinary, and this-to-to is c-clear f-to me. Even though h-he looks like a man, he’s a h-h-dog that’s here.
ACTOR 1st โ (To the audience.) And me, what can I tell you? I don’t know if I’m a man or a dog. And I don’t think even you guys will be able to tell me in the end. Because it all started in the most ordinary way. I went to a factory to look for work. I hadn’t gotten anything for three months, and I went to look for work.
3rd ACTOR โ Didn’t you read the sign? “NO VACANCY”.
1ST ACTOR โ Yes, I read it. Don’t you have anything for me?
3rd ACTOR โ If it says โThere are no vacancies,โ there aren’t any.
1ST ACTOR โ Sure. Don’t you have anything for me?
3rd ACTOR โ Neither for you, nor for the minister.7
1ST ACTOR โ Aha! Don’t you have anything for me?
3rd ACTOR โ NO!
1st ACTOR โ Turner.
3rd ACTOR โ NO!
1st ACTOR โ Mechanic.
3rd ACTOR โ NO!
1st ACTOR โ Sโฆ
3rd ACTOR โ Nโฆ
1st ACTOR โ Rโฆ
3rd ACTOR โ Nโฆ
1st ACTOR โ Fโฆ
3rd ACTOR โ Nโฆ
1st ACTOR โ Serene! Serene! Even if it’s serene!
ACTRESS โ (As if blowing a clarion.) Tutu, tu-tu-tu! The boss! (The 2nd and 3rd Actors speak through signs)
ACTOR 3 – (To the audience.) The watchman’s dog, gentlemen, had died the night before, after twenty-five years of loyalty.
ACTOR 2nd โ It was a very old dog.
ACTRESS โ Amen.
ACTOR 2nd โ (To Actor 1st.) Does he know how to bark?
ACTOR 1st โTurner.
ACTOR 2nd โ Can you bark?
1st ACTOR โ Mechanic.
ACTOR 2nd โ Can you bark?
ACTOR 1st โ Bricklayer.
2nd and 3rd ACTORS โ THERE ARE NO VACANCIES!
1st ACTOR โ (Pause.) Bowโฆ wowโฆ!
ACTOR 2nd โ Very good, I congratulate youโฆ
3rd ACTOR โ We assign him ten pesos a day salary, housing and food.
ACTOR 2nd โ As you can see, he earned ten pesos more than the real dog.
ACTRESS โ When he returned home he told me about the job he got. I was drunk.
ACTOR 1 – (To his wife.) But they promised me that as soon as a worker retired, died or was fired, they would give me his job. Have fun, Maria, have fun! Wowโฆ, wowโฆ! Have fun, Maria, have fun!
2nd and 3rd ACTORS โ Wowโฆ, wowโฆ! Have fun, Maria, have fun!
ACTRESS โ He was drunk, poor thingโฆ
ACTOR 1st โ And the other night I started workingโฆ (He crouches on all fours.)
ACTOR 2nd โ Is the box that small for you?
1ST ACTOR โ I can’t bend down that much.
3rd ACTOR โ Do you feel pressured here?
1ST ACTOR โ Yes.
3rd ACTOR โ Well, but look, don’t tell me “yes.” You have to start getting used to it. Tell me: Wowโฆwow!
ACTOR 2nd โ Do you feel pressured here? (The 1st Actor does not respond.) Does it bother you here?
1st ACTOR โ Wowโฆ wowโฆ!
ACTOR 2nd โ And wellโฆ (Exit.)
ACTOR 2nd โ Is the box that small for you?
1ST ACTOR โ I can’t bend down that much.
3rd ACTOR โ Do you feel pressured here?
1ST ACTOR โ Yes.
3rd ACTOR โ Well, but look, don’t tell me “yes.” You have to start getting used to it. Tell me: Wowโฆwow!
ACTOR 2nd โ Do you feel pressured here? (The 1st Actor does not respond.) Does it bother you here?
1st ACTOR โ Wowโฆ wowโฆ!
ACTOR 2nd โ And wellโฆ (Exit.)
1ST ACTOR โ But that night it rained, and I had to go into the booth.
ACTOR 2nd โ (To Actor 1st.) It doesn’t bother him anymoreโฆ
3rd ACTOR โ And it’s in the box.
ACTOR 2nd โ (To Actor 1st.) Did you see how one gets used to everything?
ACTRESS โ You get used to everythingโฆ
ACTORS 2nd and 3rd โ Amenโฆ
ACTRESS โ And he started to get used to it.
3rd ACTOR โ Then, when he sees someone come in, he shouts at me: Wowโฆ wow! Let’s seeโฆ
1st ACTOR โ (The 2nd Actor runs past.) Wowโฆ wowโฆ! (The 2nd Actor passes by stealthily. Wowโฆ woofโฆ! (The 2nd Actor passes by crouching.) Wowโฆ woofโฆ woofโฆ! (Sale.)
3rd ACTOR โ (To the 2nd Actor.) That’s ten pesos a day extra in our budgetโฆ
2ND ACTOR โ Mmm!
3rd ACTOR โ โฆbut the poor man’s application deserves themโฆ
2ND ACTOR โ Mmm!
3rd ACTOR โ Besides, he doesn’t eat more than the deadโฆ
2ND ACTOR โ Mmm!
3rd ACTOR โ We must help his family!
2ND ACTOR โ Mmm! Hmm! Hmm! (Exit.)
ACTRESS โ However, I saw him very sad, and I tried to console him when he returned home. (Enter Actor 1.) Today visitors cameโฆ!
1st ACTOR โ Yes?
ACTRESS โ And the dancing at the club, do you remember?
1ST ACTOR โ Yes.
ACTRESS โ What was our tango?
1st ACTOR โ I don’t know.
ACTRESS โ Of course not! “I’m glad you told meโฆ” (Actor 1 is on all fours.) And one day you brought me a carnationโฆ (She looks at him, and is horrified.) What are you doing?
1st ACTOR โ (The 2nd Actor runs past.) Wowโฆ wowโฆ! (The 2nd Actor passes by stealthily. Wowโฆ woofโฆ! (The 2nd Actor passes by crouching.) Wowโฆ woofโฆ woofโฆ! (Sale.)
3rd ACTOR โ (To the 2nd Actor.) That’s ten pesos a day extra in our budgetโฆ
2ND ACTOR โ Mmm!
3rd ACTOR โ โฆbut the poor man’s application deserves themโฆ
2ND ACTOR โ Mmm!
3rd ACTOR โ Besides, he doesn’t eat more than the deadโฆ
2ND ACTOR โ Mmm!
3rd ACTOR โ We must help his family!
2ND ACTOR โ Mmm! Hmm! Hmm! (Exit.)
ACTRESS โ However, I saw him very sad, and I tried to console him when he returned home. (Enter Actor 1.) Today visitors cameโฆ!
1st ACTOR โ Yes?
ACTRESS โ And the dancing at the club, do you remember?
1ST ACTOR โ Yes.
ACTRESS โ What was our tango?
1st ACTOR โ I don’t know.
ACTRESS โ Of course not! “I’m glad you told meโฆ” (Actor 1 is on all fours.) And one day you brought me a carnationโฆ (She looks at him, and is horrified.) What are you doing?
ACTOR 1st โ I wasn’t going to bite youโฆ I was going to kiss you, Marรญaโฆ
ACTRESS โ Ah! I thought you were going to bite meโฆ (Exit. The 2nd and 3rd Actors enter.)
ACTOR 2nd โ Of courseโฆ
3rd ACTOR โ โฆthe next morningโฆ
ACTORS 2nd and 3rd โ He had to look for work again.
1st ACTOR โ I went through several parts, until in oneโฆ
3rd ACTOR โ See, this oneโฆ we have nothing. Unlessโฆ
ACTOR 1st โ What?
3rd ACTOR โ Last night the watchman’s dog died.
ACTOR 2nd โ He was thirty-five years old, the poor thingโฆ
ACTORS 2nd and 3rd โ The poor manโฆ!
1ST ACTOR โ And I had to accept again.
ACTOR 2nd โ Of course, we paid him fifteen pesos a day. (The 2nd and 3rd Actors spin around.) Hmm! Hmmmโฆ! Hmmmโฆ!
2nd and 3rd ACTORS โ Accepted! Make it fifteen! (They leave.)
ACTRESS โ (Enter.) Of course 450 pesos is not enough for us to pay the rentโฆ
1st ACTOR โ Look, since I have the box, you can move into a room with four or five other girls, eh?
ACTRESS โ There is no other solution. And since we don’t have enough to eat eitherโฆ
ACTOR 1st โ Look, since I got used to the bone, I’m going to bring the meat to you, eh?
ACTORS 2nd and 3rd โ (Entering.) The board agreed!
1ST ACTOR and ACTRESS โ The board agreedโฆ Praise be to them! (The 2nd and 3rd Actors exit.)
1ST ACTOR โ I had already gotten used to it. The box seemed bigger to me. Walking on all fours was not much different from walking on two. We saw each other with Marรญa in the squareโฆ (He goes towards her.) Because you can’t enter my box; and since I can’t enter your roomโฆ Until one nightโฆ
ACTRESS โ We were walking. And suddenly I felt badโฆ
ACTOR 1 โ What’s wrong with you?
ACTRESS โ I have dizziness.
1ST ACTOR โ Why?
ACTRESS โ (Crying.) It seems to meโฆ that I’m going to have a sonโฆ
ACTOR 1st โ And that’s why you cry?
ACTRESS โ I’m afraidโฆ I’m afraid!
ACTOR 1st โBut why?
ACTRESS โ I’m afraidโฆ I’m afraid! I don’t want to have a child!
1st ACTOR โ Why, Marรญa? Because?
ACTRESS โ I’m afraidโฆ it’sโฆ (Mutters “dog.” Actor 1 looks at her terrified, and runs away barking. He falls to the ground. She stands up.) He leftโฆ he ran away! Sometimes he stood, and sometimes he ran on all foursโฆ
1st ACTOR โ It’s not true, I couldn’t stop! I couldn’t stop! My waist hurt if I stood up! Wowโฆ! The cars were coming at meโฆ People were looking at meโฆ (The 2nd and 3rd Actors enter.) Go away! Have you never seen a dog?
2ND ACTOR โ He’s crazy! Call a doctor! (Comes out.)
3rd ACTOR โ He’s drunk! Call a policeman! (Comes out.)
ACTRESS โ Later they told me that a man took pity on him, and approached him affectionately.
ACTOR 2nd โ (Enter.) Do you feel bad, friend? He can’t stay on all fours. Do you know how many beautiful things there are to see, standing with your eyes upward? Let’s see, stopโฆ I’ll help youโฆ Come on, stopโฆ
ACTOR 1st โ (Begins to stand up, and suddenly.) Wowโฆ wowโฆ! (Bites it.) Wowโฆ wowโฆ! (Comes out.)
ACTOR 3 – (Enter.) Anyway, when, after two years without seeing him, we asked his wife “How are you?” she answered usโฆ
ACTRESS โ I don’t know.
2ND ACTOR โ Is that okay?
ACTRESS โ I don’t know.
ACTOR 2nd โ Is it wrong?
ACTRESS โ I don’t know.
ACTORS 2nd and 3rd โ Where is he?
ACTRESS โ In the kennel.
ACTOR 3: And when we were coming here, a boxer passed by usโฆ
ACTOR 2nd โ And they told us that he couldn’t read, but that didn’t matter because he was a boxer.
3rd ACTOR โ And a conscript passed byโฆ
ACTRESS โ And a police officer passed byโฆ
ACTOR 2nd โ And they passedโฆ and they passedโฆ and you passed. And we thought maybe you might care about our friend’s storyโฆ
ACTRESS โ Because perhaps there is a woman among you now who thinks: “Won’t I haveโฆ won’t I haveโฆ?” (Mutters: “dog.”)
3rd ACTOR โ Or someone who has been offered the job of the watchman’s dogโฆ
ACTRESS โ If not, we are glad.
ACTOR 2: But if that’s the case, if there is anyone among you who you want to turn into a dog, like our friend, thenโฆ But well, then thatโฆ that’s another story!
Karina Lerman es poeta, psicoanalista, maestra de idioma hebreo y docente universitaria. Artista visual. Editรณ Las hijas de Lot por Griselda Garcรญa Editora (2018) y en Mรฉxico por Divรกn Negro ediciones (2022). Perlas, por El jardรญn de las delicias (2022). Enfrascados, poemario para las infancias (2023). Seleccionada para la Antologรญa Cรณmo decir, por Editorial Ruinas Circulares (2019). Primera menciรณn del premio Adolfo Bioy Casares (2019) con su poemario Cayupรกn. Reeditado en Chile por Editorial Navaja (2024). Con el texto Y narrarรกs a tus hijos por el Centro Ana Frank de Argentina (2021). Su textos Desmalvinizados y su texto por los 40 aรฑos de democracia argentina, han sido seleccionados por la Universidad de La Matanza (Argentina) para integrar sendas antologรญas (2023 y 2024). Seleccionada para integrar la antologรญa del premio R. Reches, Ruinas Circulares. Argentina (2023). Ha participado en el festival de poesรญa de la ciudad de Fusagasugรก (Colombia, 2022) dedicado al apoyo de los pueblos originarios. Compiladora de la Antologรญa digital Enhebradas, de una poiesis psicoanalรญtica en tiempos de pandemia (2021), la Antologรญa solidaria Mujeres en voz (Marzo de 2022). La antologรญa poรฉtica digital De pรฉrdidas y duelo. Cartografรญa de los cuerpos (2023) y Costuras de la palabra (2023). La antologรญa poรฉtica al รญdish La lengua en filigrana (2023). Becaria de LABA (laboratorio de arte y cultura judรญa en Buenos Aires, 2023). Coordina el ciclo de lecturas en diรกlogo poรฉtico Las flores de Circe. Dicta talleres de lecturas entramadas y anรกlisis de textos poรฉticos. Escribe reseรฑas y artรญculos para medios de difusiรณn literarios y psicoanalรญticos de Argentina y paรญses latinoamericanos. Ha sido traducida al mapuzungรบn, griego, inglรฉs e idish. Contacto:
Karina Lerman is a poet, psychoanalyst, Hebrew language teacher and university professor. Visual artist. He edited Las hijas de Lot by Griselda Garcรญa Editora (2018) and in Mexico by Divรกn Negro editions (2022). Perlas, for El jardรญn de las delicias (2022), Enfrascados, a collection of poems for children (2023). Selected for the Anthology Cรณmo decir, by Editorial Ruinas Circulares (2019). First mention of the Adolfo Bioy Casares award (2019) with his collection of poems Cayupรกn. Republished in Chile by Editorial Navaja (2024). With the text And You Will Narrate to your children by the Anne Frank Center in Argentina (2021). Her texts Desmalvinizados and her text for the 40 years of Argentine democracy have been selected by the University of La Matanza (Argentina) to be two anthologies (2023 and 2024). Selected to integrate the R. Reches award anthology, Circular Ruins. Argentina (2023). She has participated in the poetry festival of the city of Fusagasugรก (Colombia, 2022) dedicated to the support of indigenous peoples. Compiler of the digital Anthology Enhebradas, de una poiesis psicoanalรญtica en tiempos de pandemia (2021), the Solidarity Anthology Mujeres en voz (March 2022). The digital poetic anthology De pรฉrdidas y duelo. Cartografรญa de los cuerpos ( (2023) and Costuras de la palabra (2023). The Yiddish poetic anthology La lengua en filigrana (2023). Scholarship holder from LABA (laboratory of Jewish art and culture in Buenos Aires, 2023). Coordinates the cycle of readings in poetic dialogue Las flores de Circe. She teaches workshops on structured readings and analysis of poetic texts. She writes reviews and articles for literary and psychoanalytic media in Argentina and Latin American countries. Her work has been translated into Mapuzungun, Greek, English and Yiddish. Contact:
Cerca de la parte baja del funicular que sube hasta el Monte Petลรญn se encuentra el monumento a las vรญctimas del comunismo en el cual se contempla un conjunto escultรณrico de varias figuras humanas bajando por unas escaleras. A medida que avanzan, les van faltando partes del cuerpo.
_____________________
FLOWER OF PETRIN
Near the lower part of the funicular that goes up to Mount Petลรญn is the monument to the victims of communism in which a sculptural group of several human figures can be seen descending stairs. As they advance, they are missing body parts.
Ah, la terrible descarga en las fosas de los vivos con los muertos
BLANCO
donde un fogonazo quemรณ mirรญada de pรฉtalos,
y si acaso algรบn apellido
buscara
alivianar
su cifra
como un hilo de agua
entre las piedras.
BLANCO
tersura de una marca indeleble sobre el azul aterciopelado, paz en los ojos.
Mi notaciรณn sobre la hoja
que se marchita a la luz del crimen cuando las flores se hielan.
____________________
4.
Ah, the terrible discharge
into the graves of the living
with the dead
WHITE
where an explosion
burns a myriad
of petals,
and if, perhaps some last name
might seek to lighten
its cipher
like a thread of water
among rocks.
WHITE
smoothness of an indelible
mark on the velveted
blue, peace in
the eyes.
My notation on the leaf
that dries up in the sun
of the crime when the flowers freeze.
_____________________________
5.
ELLA ES UNA GARZA ENCORVADA
a la luz del alba:
Somnolienta,
entrecierra los ojos sin poder (dormir) sin poder restituirse del olvido.
Le leo verso tras verso (hace mรกs de una dรฉcada) al poeta quien le hace saber de su hambre, de su casa natal en un pueblito de Praga y de un รกrbol de castaรฑo de indias. Un insecto devora la curvatura (de su sueรฑo).
La memoria del hueco la seguirรก adonde vaya.
______________________
5.
SHE IS ACURVED HERON
in the light of dawn:
drowsy,
she squints without being able to (sleep) without being able to recover from oblivion.
I read the verse after verse (more than a decade ago) to the poet who lets her know of her hunger, of her birthplace in a small town of Prague and of a horse chestnut. An insect devours the curvature (of her dream.)
The memory of the void will follow her wherever she goes.
________________________
6.
ยฟERAS VOS, MADRE,
poniendo a prueba los hilos de la fe?
Habรญa llovido y la luz del atardecer en agua cielo se derramaba.
(Sollozo de estambre junto al rรญo contra toda esperanza).
Acaso, ยฟera ese el destino?
Las ropas al silencio de las รบltimas ramas en el fiero arrastre de un
aliento guardado para el final: Enie batโฆ
Y el amor era el bautismo en madre, esa irrupciรณn de lo perdido.
Azul de celajes el poema,
quedamente,
una flor de Petrรญn por cada muerto.
_____________________________
6.
WAS IT YOU, MOTHER,
putting to test threads of faith?
It had rained and the light of evening in watery sky was fading
(Sobbing of stamen together with the river against all hope.)
Perhaps that was the destiny?
The clothing on the silent last branches fiercely drags
a spirit kept for the end:
ani bat
And the love was a baptism in mother, that irruption of the lost.
Blue of sunset cloudscapes the poem,
gently,
a flower of Petrin for each of the dead.
___________________________________
7.
Y EL LIBRO en su forma
mรกs anochecida
de apagarse: durmiente
como la ahogada de regreso a la orilla,
ยฟnombrarlo, madre, acaso,
podrรญas?
Barranco luz de nadie
no lejos de la mano que te hubo escrito: una flor s
e convertรญa en ramillete
y la palabra buscando echar raรญz:
pistilo ovario pรฉtalo estigma
aquel sol negro enredado en la crecida.
__________________
7.
AND THE BOOK in its most
dusky form
fading out: asleep
like the drowned woman returning from the shore,
name it, mother, perhaps,
could you?
Ravine nobodyโs light
not far from the hand that
had written to you: a flower
turns into a bouquet and the
word seeking to take root:
pistil ovary petal, stigma
that black sun tangled in the crest.
________________________________________
8.
Y DESPUรS, la plegaria inclinaba
un argumento sobre sรญ
donde mis manos
sin territorio
ensayaban
su aleluya en un Shemรก
o un consuelo sin
horizontes.
_________________
8.
AND AFTER, the prayer pursing
an argument about itself
where my hands
without place
were practicing
its hallelujah in a Shema
or a consolation without
horizons.
__________________________________________
9.
La plegaria que se alza
EN ESTE ENSALMO que ya es grieta,
se resquebraja
y se desoye.
Insisto en conservar la incertidumbre
(algo ha de haber
en el ritmo jadeante del verbo
como una tierra indรณmita,
de un corazรณn desbocado).
____________________
9.
The prayer that rises
IN THIS INCANTATION is already a crack,
falls apart
and is disregarded.
I insist on conserving the uncertainty
(something should be
in the panting rhythm of the verb
like an indomitable land
of a flowing heart).
_______________________
10.
Y EN ESTE ACTO de leve desprendimiento ante un rรญo
monosรญlabo
se suelta el escozor
por los mil matices de un bosque de abedules.
DIGO
como si diera cuchilladas
en la vida: esta zona difusa de lo judรญo como ajeno
y lo no judรญo como propio.
DIGO
circuncidando la letra desgraciada
en la raรญz del hueso
que mueve las pรกginas de una biblia en otro mundo.
DIGO
como si la semilla de amapola
ya no fuera el sustento en lo oculto de la pena.
DIGO
fruto verbal como el rastro de baba
que deja a su paso el caracol
ante la ausencia de cordura.
ยฟhubo una vez una mรบsica
que no devenga en รบltimo reducto
contra la muerte?
DIGO
como lรกnguidos vestidos de alfabetos,
tesoros sin habla entre las noches.
DIGO
la hendidura del luto
es un nervio inรบtil entre espejos tapados.
DIGO, y madre que cruza en el limbo
la frontera cuando la escarcha
apresura sus pasos,
y su รบltima canciรณn
de arca rota
y poco ya
para decir.
____________________________
10.
AND IN THIS ACT of slight
release before a river
monosyllable
grief breaks loose
a thousand hues of a birch woods.
ISAY
as if there were slashes
In life of Jewishness as foreign.
and the not Jewish as close by.
ISAY
circumcising the disgraced letter
in the root of the bone
that moves the pages of a bible in another world.
ISAY
as if the poppy seed
was no longer the sustenance in the occult of the pain
Susana Beibe, artista argentina, realizรณ su formaciรณn en pintura y escultura. Trabaja escultura en cemento, piedra, cerรกmica, metal y elementos no convencionales. Ademรกs realiza relieves con tรฉcnicas mixtas utilizando todos los derivados del papel.Estudiรณ en la Escuela Nacional de Cerรกmica y su formaciรณn en escultura y dibujo la realizo con los maestros: Leo Tavella, Aurelio Macchi y Leo Vinci. Algunos de sus esculturas monumentales estรกn emplazadas en el Centro Cultural San Martรญn, Plaza Seca, Buenos Aires, Parque Lenรญn, La Habana, Cuba. Museo Metropolitano, Buenos Aires. Invitada a dar seminarios sobre creatividad en Espaรฑa y Canada. Realizรณ el proyecto โJugando en la Veredaโ para la lX Bienal de La Habana, muestra colateral. Ganadora del proyecto del Monumento a la Humanidad por la Argentina a realizar por la Humanitad Foundation, United Kingdom. Susana Beibe integrรณ numerosas exposiciones colectivas en salones nacionales y municipales y realizรณ muestras individuales en espacios pรบblicos y privados, a nivel nacional e internacional. Sus obras se encuentran en colecciones institucionales y privadas de Argentina y el exterior.
___________________________________________
Serie Cabezas
____________________________________________
Susana Beibe, Argentine artist, completed her training in painting and sculpture. He works sculpture in cement, stone, ceramics, metal and unconventional elements. He also makes reliefs with mixed techniques using all derivatives of paper. He studied at the National School of Ceramics and his training in sculpture and drawing was done with the masters: Leo Tavella, Aurelio Macchi and Leo Vinci. Some of his monumental sculptures are located in the San Martรญn Cultural Center, Plaza Seca, Buenos Aires, Parque Lenรญn, Havana, Cuba. Metropolitan Museum, Buenos Aires. Invited to give seminars on creativity in Spain and Canada. He carried out the project โJugando en la Veredaโ for the 10th Havana Biennial, collateral exhibition. Winner of the Monument to Humanity for Argentina project to be carried out by the Humanitad Foundation, United Kingdom. Susana Beibe participated in numerous group exhibitions in national and municipal exhibitions and held individual exhibitions in public and private spaces, nationally and internationally. His works are found in institutional and private collections in Argentina and abroad.
___________________________________
Durante sus vasta trayectoria como artista plรกstica y pintora, el arte de Susana habla por su colorido y su aproximaciรณn al mercado, siendo a la vez conmovedor y aplicable a todo tipo de espacios.
__________________________________
Throughout her vast career as a visual artist and painter, Susana’s art speaks for its color and its approach to the market, being both moving and applicable to all types of spaces.
Iair Rubin naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1941. En la Argentina fue miembro del moviยญmiento juvenil sionista “Hashomer Hatzair”, en el que asumiรณ diferentes cargos desde su adolescencia y en cuya direcciรณn participรณยญ en los aรฑos 60. Se radicรณ en Israel en 1964 y se incorยญporรณ en el kibutz Harel, en las colinas prรณxiยญmas a Jerusalรฉn y junto a la frontera jordaยญna. Alternรณ el trabajo agrรญcola en el kibutz con tareas comunitarias y educativas. Ejerciรณ funciones educativas en comunidadesยญ judรญas en Chile, Ia Argentina, Braยญsil y paรญses latinoamericanos. Cursรณ estudios de ciencias sociales en la Universidad Hebrea de Jerusalรฉn, en la que obtuvouna maestrรญa en sociologรญa de educaciรณn. Participรณ en proyectos eduยญcativos en la universidad, diversas municipalidades, ones del Ministerio de Educaciรณn, el Centro Social “Mishan” de la Histadrut, la Agencia Judรญa y la Organizaciรณn Sionista Mundial. Reside en Jerusalรฉn.
____________________________
Iair Rubin was born in Buenos Aires in 1941. In Argentina he was a member of the Zionist youth movement “Hashomer Hatzair”, in which he assumed different positions from his adolescence and in whose direction he participated in the 60s. He settled in Israel in 1964 and He incorporated Kibbutz Harel, in the hills near Jerusalem and next to the Jordanian border. He alternated agricultural work on the kibbutz with community and educational tasks. He carried out educational functions in Jewish communities in Chile, Argentina, Brazil and Latin American countries. He studied social sciences at the Hebrew University of Jerusalem, where he obtained a master’s degree in sociology of education. He participated in educational projects at the university, various municipalities, ones of the Ministry of Education, the “Mishan” Social Center of the Histadrut, the Jewish Agency and the World Zionist Organization. He resides in Jerusalem.
_________________________________________________
__________________________________________
Las colinas de Granada y los rรญos de Amazonas
-iShalom! -oรญ a mis espaldas y me volvรญ sorprendido, pues no esperaba escuยญchar el saludo familiar que solemos intercambiar con mis compatriotas preยญcisamente en aquel lejano hotel del Amazonas, situado en la capital de! estaยญ do brasileรฑo norteรฑo y tropical.
Me encontraba frente a la mesa de recepciรณn de! suntuoso hotel; no coยญnocรญa a nadie y, aparentemente, nadie me conocรญa. Unos dรญas antes habรญa lleยญgado a aquella tierra hรบmeda y calurosa para cumplir funciones en el seno de la pequeรฑa comunidad judรญa local; habรญa terminado mi trabajo la noche anterior y me preparaba a cerrar cuentas y partir de regreso a San Pablo. No ocultaba mi presencia pero tampoco la ostentaba, asรญ que me asombro que alguien me saludara con un “Shalom” pronunciado en voz alta y clara. No; no estaba soรฑando y lo oรญdo no era producto de mi imaginaciรณn.
Los reflejos me hicieron volver velozmente para enfrentarme con el oriยญgen del saludo. Definitivamente, era un desconocido; se trataba de un homยญbre algunos aรฑos mas joven que yo, de estatura mediana y la tez oscura tรญpiยญca de los brasileรฑos del norte. Me observaba con rostro risueรฑo, afable y nada amenazante, pero no sabรญa quien era. Como no suelo hablar con desconocidos y menos aรบn en la selva brasileรฑa, ni siquiera en el lobby de un respetable hotel, me atrevรญ a vencer la resistencia inicial y le conteste educadamenยญte con otro cordial “iShalom!”
Para su gran desilusiรณn, me volvรญ hacia el mostrador de recepciรณn para terminar de pagar mi cuenta, despedirme gentilmente del conserje, repartir algunas propinas entre quienes me habรญan atendido solรญcitamente durante aquellos dรญas, tomar el bolso y la carpeta de trabajo y dirigirme hacia un sillรณn mullido para esperar el taxi que me llevarรญa al aeropuerto. La sorpresa no habรญa pasado y me sentรญ inquieto mientras me dedicaba a observar a quien hace tan sรณlo unos minutos me habรญa saludado y dejado perplejo y preocuยญpado. No, no habรญa ningรบn motivo de preocupaciรณn: era un personaje caracยญterรญstico de! norte brasileรฑo, vestido con la ropa tรญpica de! trรณpico, de buen porte, facciones agradables e inteligentes, simpรกtico y amable. Al parecer, tambiรฉn el cerraba sus cuentas y se preparaba para partir. Un sujeto comรบn y corriente que no implicaba ninguna amenaza ni motivo de preocupaciรณn. No parecรญa judรญo. Definitivamente, era brasileรฑo: de pura cepa norteรฑa, ta! vez con algo de portuguรฉs, pero de judรญo, nada.
Por lo visto, tampoco yo parezco judรญo y ya me confundieron con turco, griego o italiano. No exhibo ningรบn sรญmbolo que me identifique oficialmenยญte como ta!; no uso el solideo que distingue a los judรญos religiosos, no llevo una cadena con la Estrella de David ni tampoco la chamsa de los judรญos orienยญtales que, al parecer, los protege de! ma! de ojo y les da buena suerte en los negocios. Nada. Ningรบn signo que me identifique como judรญo o israelรญ. Tamยญpoco mi carpeta o mi bolso llevan inscripciones en hebreo que me seรฑalen como ta!, ni tarjeta de identificaciรณn de viaje; nada. No es que oculte mi conยญdiciรณn judรญa ni mi ciudadanรญa israelรญ; todo lo contrario, son motivo de proยญfundo orgullo para mรญ, pero tampoco las luzco como bandera, sobre todo en mis viajes a lugares exรณticos.
Hacรญa cinco o seis dรญas que me encontraba en Manaos. Mas allรก de mis funciones especรญficas en la pequeรฑa comunidad judรญa, dediquรฉ los momenยญtos libres a conocer esa pintoresca ciudad y a recorrer sus largas calles y sus amplias avenidas, invadidas por los colores y aromas provenientes de las aguas profundas y de la selva. Notรฉ el activo comercio de productos llegados de lejanas tierras orientales, europeas y americanas; visitรฉ la vieja sinagoga de clara influencia marroquรญ y las iglesias barrocas y coloniales. Por ultimo, recorrรญ los fantรกsticos y contradictorios restos arquitectรณnicos de un mundo opulento: la รpera del Amazonas, emula de aquella otra que se levanta enMilan y que allรญ, en la proximidad de la jungla brasilera, hospedara con orgullo hada ya varias dรฉcadas las mรกs famosas orquestas de! mundo y los mรกs prestigiosos cantantes de รณpera europeos, para deleite y ostentaciรณn de la aristocracia local, enriquecida entonces con la explotaciรณn del caucho, hoyextinguida.
Durante horas caminรฉ por los mercados y las ferias, rodeado por la a!garabia de un pueblo alegre y a la vez resignado a una vida de esfuerzos y privaciones, sumergido en una variedad infinita de frutos tropicales desconocidos y de especias e hierbas que curan los males de! cuerpo y las penurias del alma. Vรญ los peces mas exรณticos y los pรกjaros mas coloridos del mundo, y me invadiรณ el aroma de las frituras espesas y las salsas excitantes. Desde la baยญranda ruinosa observรฉ el rio ancho y turbio, que trae sus aguas correntosas, lIenos de barro y semillas, frutos y cortezas, grandes navรญos y barcas endebles, desde el corazรณn del Nuevo Continente. Bajรฉ al puerto, el famoso puerto floยญtante de Manaos con cientos de embarcaciones amarradas y otras que llegan y parten, creando por instantes el encuentro de las mercancรญas con los traยญbajadores portuarios y mercachifles, de pasajeros que arrastran sus modestos atados y su precaria existencia por esa vรญa de agua y lodo que los transporta desde las profundidades de esa Amรฉrica oscura y mestiza, con los sueรฑos, esperanzas y alegrรญas.
Cientos de barcazas y navรญos, miles de rostros curtidos por un sol implaยญcable y lluvias prolongadas. Cada embarcaciรณn tiene un nombre de significaยญdo misterioso, que incita a descifrar los secretos del pasado y los enigmas de un futuro incierto. Cada navรญo tiene un destino diferente y propio, pero tambiรฉn la realidad de un mundo distante a conocer y descubrir. Cada rostro enยญcierra una historia fascinante y una vida ruda e incierta, envuelta en rรญos desยญbordados e islas anegadas, a la bรบsqueda permanente de y tierra firme donde plantar un รกrbol y construir una casa, que volverรก a inundarse el prรณximo invierno. Manaos, tierra de aromas y colorido sin fin, de ruidos ensordecedores en las calles y de hondos silencios en sus rรญos profundos.
El taxi habrรญa de llevarme en poco tiempo al aeropuerto, arrancรกndome de ese mundo mรกgico y colorido para transportarme a una San Pablo cosยญmopolita y gris. Mientras tanto, sentado en el lobby de! hotel, contemplaba a quien -tal vez inocentemente- habรญa conseguido inquietarme con el tan judรญo “Shalom”. Ambos permanecemos en nuestros sillones a la espera de algo: yo esperaba a mi taxi; ยฟy el?
Volvi a mirarlo largamente; me devolviรณ una mirada franca, abierta y amistosa, por lo que decidi encararlo para satisfacer mi curiosidad y disipar de una vez por todas mis preocupaciones y sospechas.
-ยฟPor quX me saludรณ con un “Shalom”? -preguntรฉ directamente.
-Porque entendรญ que el seรฑor es judรญo. ยฟAcaso no lo es? -respondiรณ sonriendo, satisfecho de sรญ mismo.
–ยฟY cรณmo sabe que soy judรญo, si se puede saber? -preguntรฉ un poco inquieto.
-Por las letras impresas en las hojas de su carpeta -las seรฑialรณ y agregรณ una nueva pregunta-:
-ยฟNo es hebreo?
Observรฉ la carpeta que llevaba bajo el brazo y comprobรฉ que, por descuiยญdo, algunas hojas habรญan quedado al descubierto y mostraban unas lineas en hebreo.
-Pues, sรญ. Es una revista en hebreo -Esta vez fui yo quien agrego una pregunta-: ยฟEl seรฑor entiende hebreo?ยญ
-No, no entiendo. Pero conozco las letras, y estaba seguro de que eran hebreas -contesto.
Se hizo un corto silencio, con la expectativa de que, una vez iniciado el dialogo, la conversaciรณn empezara a fluir. Al parecer, ambos habรญamos terยญminado nuestras respectivas ocupaciones y no tenรญamos mayor prisa. Volvรญ a observarlo detenidamente: era un hombre de unos cuarenta anos, de tez osยญcura, rostro agradable y ojos inteligentes que reflejaban la tรญpica picardรญa braยญsilera. Por la calidad de su ropa podia entender que pertenecรญa a la clase media acomodada, tal vez un industrial o ejecutivo en viaje de negocios. Tambiรฉn el llevaba un portafolio y una carpeta tan abultada como Ia mรญa con diarios y papeles, pero no en hebreo.
-Pues, sรญ. Es una revista en hebreo -Esta vez fui yo quien agrego una preยญgunta-: ยฟEl seรฑor entiende hebreo?
-No, no entiendo. Pero conozco las letras, y estaba seguro de que eran hebreas -contestรณ.
Se hizo un corto silencio, con la expectativa de que, una vez iniciado el dialogo, la conversaciรณn empezara a fluir. Al parecer, ambos habรญamos terยญminado nuestras respectivas ocupaciones y no tenรญamos mayor prisa. Volvรญ a observarlo detenidamente: era un hombre de unos cuarenta anos, de tez osยญcura, rostro agradable y ojos inteligentes que reflejaban la tรญpica picardรญa braยญsilera. Por la calidad de su ropa podia entender que pertenecรญa a la clase media acomodada, tal vez un industrial o ejecutivo en viaje de negocios. Tambiรฉn el llevaba un portafolio y una carpeta tan abultada como Ia mรญa con diarios y papeles, pero no en hebreo.
-ยฟEI seรฑor es judรญo? -preguntรฉ sin mucho convencimiento y con bastanยญ te curiosidad, tratando de reanudar la conversaciรณn interrumpida.
-No. No soy judรญo -respondiรณ un poco indeciso-. No… en realidad bueno… es un poco complicado… Judรญo, judรญo en realidad no soy… Ahora no Io soy, pero un poco sรญ, ya que mi familia en un tiempo lo fue… Pero ahora…no -agregรณ titubeando.
Como no esperaba una respuesta tan confusa y no menos sorprendido que el primer “Shalom” oido, volvรญ a preguntar con impaciencia:
-ยฟCรณmoque es judรญo pero solo un poco, y ahora no y antes sรญ? -protestรฉ-. 0 se es, o no se es. No se puede ser antes sรญ y ahora no; o solo un poco mucho. Las cosas no son asรญ.
-Calma, calma -se disculpรณ con una sonrisa leve-. Al parecer, mi familia lo fue en el pasado lejano, hace muchรญsimos anos, siglos tal vez… Al parecer, provenimos de una antigua familia judรญa de mucha alcurnia, pero se interrumpiรณ hace anos, y ahora ya no somos mas.
El relato imprevisto prometรญa ser interesante para una tarde de otoรฑo: un hotel cรฉntrico de Ia capital de la selva brasileรฑa. Yo ya tenรญa mi historia; no estaba dispuesto a abandonarla fรกcilmente, asรญ que seguรญ preguntando:
-ยฟY cรณmo sabe todo eso? ยฟQuiรฉn le contรณ que su familia es de procedencia judรญa? ยฟQuรฉ certeza tiene? -ataquรฉ con impaciencia.
-Miabuelo Zacarรญas -explicรณ con mucha calma-. El viejo siempre me narraba historias del rey David y el rey Salomon. รsos fueron Ios cuentos que oรญa de niรฑo antes de dormir, historias de heroรญsmo y valentรญa, de moral justicia, que poblaron mi infancia; las recuerdo muy bien. Leyendas. El tenรญa gran poder de narraciรณn, una memoria fabulosa y descripciones de imaginaciรณn. Hablaba de las murallas de Jerusalรฉn, de las colinas de la Galilea y del valle del Jordan. Cuando el hablaba, era como si viera esos paisaยญjes con todo detalle. Mas tarde, cuando crecรญ y pude entender las cosas de otra manera, me explico el significado de mi nombre. Tengo un nombre hebreo, ยฟsabe? Aaron. Aunque lo brasilericรฉ y hoy lo escribo “Aron”, sin la hache intermedia. Dicen que fue el hermano del gran Moisรฉs y que de el proยญvienen vuestros sacerdotes. Un gran hombre, ยฟno es verdad?
Asรญ fue como de pronto yo, siempre tan cauto y discreto, por culpa de unas hojas descuidadas, me encontrรฉ en la tรณrrida capital del Amazonas con Aron, un brasileรฑo orgulloso de su nombre y de su procedencia judรญa; mรกs aรบn, de su presunta alcurnia que se remontaba hasta la estirpe de Moisรฉs y su hermano Aaron. Por lo menos eso era lo que el aseguraba, basรกndose en los relatos del abuelo Zacarรญas. Pero yo no habรญa llegado desde tan lejos para oรญr historias de judรญos. Ocupado diariamente con la comunidad judeo-brasiยญleรฑa, habรญa viajado a Manaos para realizar actividades con la antigua comuยญnidad de! Amazonas, que prosperara junto al rio caudaloso a fines del siglo XIX. Me encontrรฉ con los lideres de la comunidad y escuche las historias del pasado y de! presente. Con los jรณvenes hablamos sobre Israel y el Oriente Medio, sobre la condiciรณn judรญa y sus dilemas; les ayude a planificar activiยญdades y proyectos educativos, y una vez terminadas mis funciones, dediquรฉ algunos dรญas libres a recorrer esa excitante regiรณn.
No. No buscaba las antiguas historias de mi pueblo, que conozco bien, sino lo nuevo y exรณtico del fascinante mundo tropical. Por eso descendรญ los rรญos torrentosos en pos de la naturaleza y sus maravillosos secretos. Me encontrรฉ de pronto surcando aguas que conducen al corazรณn de mi contiยญnente americano, amanecรญ en el seno de rรญos profundos que arrastran la siยญmiente de una America virgen que huele a hierbas y frutos, contemple largos crepรบsculos poblados de pรกjaros coloridos que cubren un cielo tรณrrido y carยญgado de lluvia, surque cauces que cortan las islas en un largo y penoso camiยญno en busca del mar. Y hubo tambiรฉn algunos atardeceres frente a un rรญo ancho, un cielo bajo y un silencio milenario poblado de selva, que invitaba ala paz y la relajaciรณn.
Era el corazรณn mismo de una America ancestral, con la fuerza de una naยญturaleza en lucha por su supervivencia, la quietud y el largo silencio, la conยญtemplaciรณn de paisajes fluviales bordeados de selva, el aroma profundo de la tierra densa, del matorral salvaje y del barro, el fruto, la semilla y el รกrbol No. Definitivamente, no fui a buscar los relatos de mi pueblo, pero ellos me encontraron en medio de la selva y, al parecer, no estaban dispuestos a abanยญdonarme tan fรกcilmente. Todo por unas pocas hojas descuidadas, que escaยญparon traviesamente de mi carpeta de trabajo.
Aron continuรณ su relato:
-El viejo Zacarรญas, mi abuelo, contaba que venรญamos de Granada, la vieja capital mora, andaluza y judรญa. Hasta allรญ llega la memoria histรณrica de mi faยญmilia. รl solรญa hablar mucho de Granada y tambiรฉn de Jerusalรฉn, la otra caยญpital amurallada y situada en las colinas.
Cerrรฉ los ojos por un momento e imagine a Granada. La vi con la belleยญza del cielo invernal cargado de lluvia y tambiรฉn en los luminosos amaneceยญres del verano andaluz. La vi con las estrechas calles de Albaicin y la vieja juยญderรญa, y tambiรฉn con los frescos patios con naranjales y las fuentes que regaยญban jardines moros y judXos. La vi por un instante en la plenitud de los miยญnaretes y las altas murallas, soberbias y judรญas. Pero el continuรณ:
-Por supuesto que antes de Granada hubo otra historia, pero la memoria familiar llega tan sรณlo hasta allรญ. Como usted sabe, en esas colinas y entre esas murallas floreciรณ una juderรญa prรณspera, entre la que se contaban mis antepasados: poetas y mรฉdicos, hombres de negocios y cientรญficos, artesanos y orfebres famosos; todos ellos judรญos piadosos, estudiosos de las Sagradas Escrituras. Al parecer, durante generaciones vivieron en plena concordia, protegidos por los califas musulmanes. Esa fue nuestra familia. Como usted seguramente sabe, durante los siglos XII a XV, los reyes moros lucharon conยญtra los espaรฑoles; mi familia luchรณ junto a los รบltimos califas, que finalยญmente fueron derrotados. Fueron expulsados de Espaรฑa y conducidos al desยญtierro en las islas Azores, donde llevaron una vida de prisiรณn y exilio. El viejo Zacarรญas contaba que uno de mis antepasados, un afamado rabino y cientรญfico de nombre Yehudรก, consiguiรณ que lo liberaran y durante aรฑos vivieron en esas islas portuguesas manteniendo su judaรญsmo en secreto, como tantos otros.
Otro antepasado mio, de nombre Eleazar, logrรณ finalmente trasladar a nuestra familia al continente europeo. De allรญ emprendieron en el siglo XVI, junto con muchos otros, la travesรญa hacia el Brasil, con la esperanza de que en el Nuevo Mundo pudieran regresar finalmente al seno de su pueblo y vivir abiertamente como judรญos. La historia, como usted bien sabe, nos demostrรณ que esa ilusiรณn no fue posible.
-Pero ustedes, ยฟdXnde viven hoy dรญa? ยฟDonde esta hoy su familia? -preยญguntรฉ, tratando de obtener mas evidencias de esa historia increรญble.
-Nuestra familia es del nordeste, en donde vivimos desde el siglo XVI, en el estado de Paraiba, entre Campina Grande y Joao Pessoa. Durante siglos mantuvimos de alguna forma nuestra religiรณn y nuestras costumbres: los nombres, el Shabbat, algunas festividades, la prohibiciรณn de comer puerco y de mezclar came con leche, las viejas leyendas transmitidas de padres a hijos y a nietos, los casamientos en el seno de algunas familias, la tradiยญciรณn… Lamentablemente, eso se perdiรณ.
-ยฟCuรกndo? -volvรญ a preguntar con impaciencia.
-No sรฉ precisamente; tal vez con la generaciรณn de mis abuelos… Mis padres ya no se consideran judรญos. Tampoco son cristianos, pero dejaron de mantener las viejas tradiciones -dijo tristemente.
– ยฟY usted? ยฟUsted no se considera judรญo? ยฟNo se siente judรญo? -insistรญ.
-Bueno, yo… ya le dije. Yo sรญ me siento judรญo, sรฉ que eso estรก en mi sangre. Pero no sรฉ; en verdad me encuentro confuso y ambivalente. Lo que es nuestra historia, lo que me contaba mi abuelo, lo que leo hoy dรญa … todo eso me da mucha emociรณn y lo amo mucho. Pero usted sabe como es la vida: tiene su curso y uno fluye con ella. No es fรกcil regresar a las raรญces. Se neceยญsita mucha fuerza de voluntad y mucha valentรญa, y yo no sรฉ si las tengo -resยญpondiรณ con un poco de timidez y vergรผenza, pero sin perder la sonrisa.
Se hizo un corto silencio. Pensรฉ un poco y tomรฉ coraje para preguntar lo que ya flotaba en el ambiente:
-ยฟNo le gustarรญa volver a ser judรญo, regresar al seno de su pueblo, recupeยญrar la historia?
-No sรฉ -respondiรณ titubeando-. Hace falta mucho coraje para ello, mucha fuerza de voluntad. Tai vez algรบn dรญa…
-Y ademรกs de las historias y leyendas de su abuelo, ยฟhay algo mรกs que lesยญ testimonie vuestro origen? -volvรญ a preguntar inquisitorialmente.
-Hay un viejo baรบl que conservรฉ en el sรณtano. A veces lo abro y toco los objetos; no a todos los reconozco. Es el precioso tesoro de la familia que guarยญdo con celo. No sรฉ que hay de autรฉntico en esos viejos objetos, pero los conยญservo con cuidado. Son trozos de pergaminos antiguos con letras hebreas un poco borradas por el tiempo, algunas cajitas de cuero, viejos utensilios de bronce y plata cuyo significado ignoro. Mi abuelo Zacarรญas solรญa decir que son objetos sagrados y antiguos, que provienen de Granada, de Sevilla y otros lugares de Espaรฑa y Portugal. Fueron traรญdos por nuestros antepasados desde la vieja Europa y ocultados a los inquisidores, conservados en secreto y pasados de generaciรณn en generaciรณn como el gran tesoro de nuestra familia. A mรญ, el baรบl me fue entregado el dรญa que cumplรญ trece aรฑos, con la promesa de cuiยญdarlo y pasarlo a mi vez a mis hijos o a mis nietos.
Cerrรฉ los ojos un instante e imaginรณ el viejo baรบl. Toquรฉ con cuidado los pergaminos y trate de descifrar las letras hebreas semi-borradas. Palpรฉ emoยญcionado el cuero mustio de las filacterias, el cobre oscuro y Ia plata ennegreยญcida de los antiguos candelabros y las mezuzot. Pero frente a mi surgiรณ de pronto el conserje, que amablemente requerรญa mi presencia.
-Seรฑor Rubin, su taxi lo espera allรญ, bajo la lluvia. Si no se apura, llegarรก tarde al aeropuerto. Mire que a esta hora el transito es muy pesado, y con la lluvia el viaje se puede demorar.
Nos despedimos efusivamente. Aron no me ofreciรณ su tarjeta con la diยญrecciรณn y el telรฉfono, como era de esperar, y tal vez por eso tampoco yo le di la mรญa. El “Shalom” pronunciado ahora en forma mas clara que al inicio de nuestro encuentro tenรญa un significado mรกs fuerte que entonces.
Cรณmodamente sentado en el taxi, en camino al aeropuerto y en medio de una fuerte lluvia tropical, seguรญa viendo un viejo baรบl lleno de tesoros de Granada.
-iShalom! -I heard behind me and I turned around surprised, because I did not expect to hear the familiar greeting that we usually exchange with my compatriots precisely in that distant hotel in the Amazon, located in the capital of! northern and tropical Brazilian state.
I was in front of the reception desk of a sumptuous hotel; I didn’t know anyone and, apparently, no one knew me. A few days before he had arrived in that humid and hot land to carry out duties within the small local Jewish community; I had finished my work the night before and was preparing to close accounts and leave back to San Pablo. I didn’t hide my presence but I didn’t flaunt it either, so I was surprised that someone greeted me with a loud and clear “Shalom.” No; I was not dreaming and what I heard was not a product of my imagination.
The reflections made me turn quickly to face the origin of the greeting. He was definitely an unknown; He was a man a few years younger than me, of medium height and the dark complexion typical of northern Brazilians. He looked at me with a smiling, affable and non-threatening face, but I didn’t know who he was. Since I don’t usually talk to strangers and even less so in the Brazilian jungle, not even in the lobby of a respectable hotel, I dared to overcome the initial resistance and politely answered him with another cordial “iShalom!”
To his great disappointment, I turned to the reception desk to finish paying my bill, say goodbye graciously to the concierge, distribute some tips among those who had solicitously assisted me during those days, take my bag and work folder and head towards an armchair. soft to wait for the taxi that would take me to the airport. The surprise had not passed and I felt restless as I dedicated myself to observing the person who only a few minutes ago had greeted me and left me perplexed and worried. No, there was no reason for concern: it was a characteristic character of! northern Brazilian, dressed in typical clothing! tropic, of good bearing, pleasant and intelligent features, friendly and kind. Apparently, he too was closing his accounts and preparing to leave. An ordinary guy who posed no threat or cause for concern. He didn’t look Jewish. He was definitely Brazilian: of pure northern stock, ta! maybe with some Portuguese, but nothing Jewish.
Apparently, I don’t look Jewish either and I’ve already been mistaken for Turkish, Greek or Italian. I do not display any symbol that officially identifies me as ta!; I do not wear the skullcap that distinguishes religious Jews, I do not wear a chain with the Star of David nor the chamsa of Eastern Jews which, apparently, protects them from! Ma! eye and gives them good luck in business. Nothing. No sign identifying me as Jewish or Israeli. Nor do my folder or my bag have inscriptions in Hebrew that mark me as ta!, nor a travel identification card; nothing. It’s not that I hide my Jewishness or my Israeli citizenship; On the contrary, they are a source of deep pride for me, but I don’t wear them as a flag either, especially on my trips to exotic places.
I had been in Manaus for five or six days. Beyond my specific duties in the small Jewish community, I dedicated my free moments to getting to know that picturesque city and exploring its long streets and wide avenues, invaded by the colors and aromas coming from the deep waters and the jungle. I noticed the active trade of products from distant eastern, European and American lands; I visited the old synagogue with clear Moroccan influence and the baroque and colonial churches. Finally, I toured the fantastic and contradictory architectural remains of an opulent world: the Amazon Opera, emulating the other one that was built in Milan and that there, in the proximity of the Brazilian jungle, had proudly hosted for several decades now the most famous orchestras of! world and the most prestigious European opera singers, to the delight and ostentation of the local aristocracy, then enriched by the exploitation of rubber, now extinct.
For hours I walked through the markets and fairs, surrounded by the excitement of a happy people and at the same time resigned to a life of effort and deprivation, immersed in an infinite variety of unknown tropical fruits and spices and herbs that cure ailments. of! body and the hardships of the soul. I saw the most exotic fish and the most colorful birds in the world, and the aroma of thick fried foods and exciting sauces invaded me. From the ruined railing I observed the wide and murky river, which brings its rushing waters, full of mud and seeds, fruits and bark, large ships and flimsy boats, from the heart of the New Continent. I went down to the port, the famous floating port of Manaus with hundreds of boats moored and others that arrive and depart, creating for moments the meeting of the goods with the port workers and peddlers, of passengers who drag their modest bundles and their precarious existence through that path of water and mud that transports them from the depths of that dark and mixed America, with dreams, hopes and joys.
Hundreds of barges and ships, thousands of faces weathered by a relentless sun and prolonged rains. Each boat has a name with a mysterious meaning, which encourages us to decipher the secrets of the past and the enigmas of an uncertain future. Each ship has its own different destination, but also the reality of a distant world to know and discover. Each face contains a fascinating story and a rough and uncertain life, wrapped in overflowing rivers and flooded islands, in the permanent search for land on which to plant a tree and build a house, which will flood again next winter. Manaus, land of endless aromas and colors, of deafening noises in the streets and of deep silences in its deep rivers.
The taxi would take me to the airport in a short time, taking me away from that magical and colorful world to transport me to a cosmopolitan and gray San Pablo. Meanwhile, sitting in the lobby of! hotel, I contemplated who – perhaps innocently – had managed to unsettle me with the very Jewish “Shalom”. We both remain in our chairs waiting for something: I was waiting for my taxi; and the?
I looked at him for a long time again; He gave me a frank, open and friendly look, so I decided to face him to satisfy my curiosity and dispel my worries and suspicions once and for all.
-Why did X greet me with “Shalom”? -I asked directly.
-Because I understood that the man is Jewish. Isn’t it? -He responded smiling, satisfied with himself.
-And how do you know that I am Jewish, if you can know? -I asked a little worried.
-Because of the letters printed on the pages of your folder -he pointed to them and added a new question-:
-Isn’t he Hebrew?
I looked at the folder he was carrying under his arm and realized that, due to carelessness, some pages had been left exposed and showed some lines in Hebrew.
-Well yes. It is a magazine in Hebrew -This time it was I who added a question-: Does the gentleman understand Hebrew?
-No I do not understand. “But I know the letters, and I was sure they were Hebrew,” He answered.
There was a short silence, with the expectation that, once the dialogue began, the conversation would begin to flow. Apparently, we had both finished our respective occupations and were in no further hurry. I looked at him carefully again: he was a man of about forty, with a dark complexion, a pleasant face and intelligent eyes that reflected the typical Brazilian mischief. From the quality of his clothes I could understand that he belonged to the wealthy middle class, perhaps an industrialist or executive on a business trip. He also carried a briefcase and a folder as thick as mine with diaries and papers, but not in Hebrew.
-Is the man Jewish? -I asked without much conviction and with enough curiosity, trying to resume the interrupted conversation.
-No. “I’m not Jewish,” he answered a little hesitantly. Noโฆ actually wellโฆ it’s a bit complicatedโฆ Jewish, I’m not really Jewishโฆ Now I’m not, but I am a little bit, since my family once wasโฆ But “Nowโฆno,” he added hesitantly.
Not expecting such a confusing answer and no less surprised than the first “Shalom” I heard, I asked again impatiently:
-So he’s Jewish but only a little, and now he’s not and before he was? -I protested-. Either it is, or it is not. You cannot be yes before and no now; or just a little bit a lot. Things are not like that.
“Calm down, calm down,” he apologized with a slight smile. Apparently, my family was in the distant past, many years ago, centuries perhapsโฆ Apparently, we come from an ancient Jewish family of high rank, but it was interrupted years ago, and now we are no longer.
The unforeseen story promised to be interesting for an autumn afternoon: a central hotel in the capital of the Brazilian jungle. I already had my story; I wasn’t willing to give her up easily, so I kept asking:
-And how do you know all that? Who told you that your family is of Jewish origin? What certainty do you have? -I attacked impatiently.
“My grandfather Zacarรญas,” he explained very calmly. The old man always told me stories about King David and King Solomon. Those were the stories I heard as a child before going to sleep, stories of heroism and bravery, of moral justice, that populated my childhood; I remember them very well. Legends. He had great storytelling power, a fabulous memory and imaginative descriptions. He spoke of the walls of Jerusalem, the hills of Galilee and the Jordan Valley. When he spoke, it was as if he saw those landscapes in great detail. Later, when I grew up and could understand things
In another way, I explained the meaning of my name. I have a Hebrew name, you know? Aaron. Although I Brazilianized it and today I write it “Aron”, without the intermediate axe. They say that he was the brother of the great Moses and that your priests come from him. A great man, isn’t he?
That’s how I, always so cautious and discreet, because of some neglected leaves, suddenly found myself in the torrid capital of the Amazon with Aron, a Brazilian proud of his name and his Jewish origins; even more so, of his alleged lineage that went back to the lineage of Moses and his brother Aaron. At least that was what he claimed, based on Grandpa Zacarรญas’ stories. But I had not come that far to hear Jewish stories. Busy daily with the Jewish-Brazilian community, he had traveled to Manaus to carry out activities with the ancient community of! Amazon, which prospered next to the mighty river at the end of the 19th century. I met with community leaders and heard stories of the past and of! present. With the young people we talked about Israel and the Middle East, about the Jewish condition and its dilemmas; I helped them plan activities and educational projects, and once my duties were finished, I spent some free days touring that exciting region.
No. I was not looking for the old stories of my people, which I know well, but for the new and exotic of the fascinating tropical world. That’s why I descended the torrential rivers in pursuit of nature and its wonderful secrets. I suddenly found myself crossing waters that lead to the heart of my American continent, I woke up in the bosom of deep rivers that carry the seeds of a virgin America that smells of herbs and fruits, I contemplated long twilights populated by colorful birds that covered a torrid sky and loaded with rain, I cross channels that cut through the islands on a long and arduous path in search of the sea. And there were also some sunsets in front of a wide river, a low sky and an ancient silence filled with jungle, which invited peace and relaxation.
It was the very heart of an ancient America, with the force of a nature fighting for its survival, the stillness and long silence, the contemplation of river landscapes bordered by jungle, the deep aroma of the dense earth, the wild scrub and the mud, the fruit, the seed and the tree No. I definitely did not go looking for the stories of my people, but they found me in the middle of the jungle and, apparently, they were not willing to abandon me so easily. All because of a few careless pages, which mischievously escaped from my work folder.
Aron continued his story:
-Old Zacarรญas, my grandfather, said that we came from Granada, the old Moorish, Andalusian and Jewish capital. That’s as far as my family’s historical memory goes. He used to talk a lot about Granada and also about Jerusalem, the other walled capital located in the hills.
I closed my eyes for a moment and imagined Granada. I saw it with the beauty of the rain-laden winter sky and also in the bright dawns of the Andalusian summer. I saw it with the narrow streets of Albaicin and the old Jewish quarter, and also with the cool patios with orange groves and the fountains that watered Moorish and Jewish gardens. I saw it for a moment in the fullness of the minarets and the high walls, superb and Jewish.
But he continued:
-Of course there was another story before Granada, but the family memory only reaches there. As you know, on those hills and within those walls a prosperous Jewish community flourished, among which were my ancestors: poets and doctors, businessmen and scientists, famous artisans and goldsmiths; all of them pious Jews, students of the Holy Scriptures. Apparently, for generations they lived in complete harmony, protected by the Muslim caliphs. That was our family. As you surely know, during the 12th to 15th centuries, the Moorish kings fought against the Spanish; My family fought alongside the last caliphs, who were ultimately defeated. They were expelled from Spain and driven into exile on the Azores Islands, where they lived a life of prison and exile. Old Zechariah said that one of my ancestors, a famous rabbi and scientist named Yehudah, managed to get him released and for years they lived on those Portuguese islands keeping their Judaism a secret, like so many others.
Another ancestor of mine, named Eleazar, finally managed to move our family to the European continent. From there they undertook the journey to Brazil in the 16th century, along with many others, in the hope that in the New World they could finally return to the bosom of their people and live openly as Jews. History, as you well know, showed us that this illusion was not possible.
-But you, where do you live today? Where is your family today? -I asked, trying to obtain more evidence of that incredible story.
-Our family is from the northeast, where we have lived since the 16th century, in the state of Paraiba, between Campina Grande and Joao Pessoa. For centuries we maintained our religion and customs in some way: the names, the Shabbat, some festivities, the prohibition of eating pork and mixing meat with milk, the old legends transmitted from parents to children and grandchildren, marriages within some families, traditionโฆ Unfortunately, that was lost.
-When? -I asked again impatiently.
-I don’t know precisely; maybe with my grandparents’ generationโฆ My parents no longer consider themselves Jewish. “They are not Christians either, but they stopped maintaining the old traditions,” he said sadly.
-And you? You don’t consider yourself Jewish? Don’t you feel Jewish? -I insisted.
-Well, Iโฆ I already told you. I do feel Jewish, I know that is in my blood. But I do not know; I really find myself confused and ambivalent. What our history is, what my grandfather told me, what I read todayโฆ all of that gives me a lot of emotion and I love it very much. But you know how life is: it has its course and you flow with it. It is not easy to return to the roots. “It takes a lot of willpower and a lot of courage, and I don’t know if I have them,” he responded with a little shyness and embarrassment, but without losing his smile.
There was a short silence. I thought a little and took the courage to ask what was already floating in the air:
-Wouldn’t you like to be a Jew again, return to the bosom of your people, recover history?
“I don’t know,” he answered hesitantly. It takes a lot of courage, a lot of willpower. Maybe somedayโฆ
-And besides the stories and legends of your grandfather, is there anything else that testifies to your origin? -I asked again inquisitorially.
-But you, where do you live today? Where is your family today? -I asked, trying to obtain more evidence of that incredible story.
-Our family is from the northeast, where we have lived since the 16th century, in the state of Paraiba, between Campina Grande and Joao Pessoa. For centuries we maintained our religion and customs in some way: the names, the Shabbat, some festivities, the prohibition of eating pork and mixing meat with milk, the old legends transmitted from parents to children and grandchildren, marriages within some families, traditionโฆ Unfortunately, that was lost.
-When? -I asked again impatiently.
-I don’t know precisely; maybe with my grandparents’ generationโฆ My parents no longer consider themselves Jewish. “They are not Christians either, but they stopped maintaining the old traditions,” he said sadly.
And you? You don’t consider yourself Jewish? Don’t you feel Jewish? -I insisted.
-Well, Iโฆ I already told you. I do feel Jewish, I know that is in my blood. But I do not know; I really find myself confused and ambivalent. What our history is, what my grandfather told me, what I read todayโฆ all of that gives me a lot of emotion and I love it very much. But you know how life is: it has its course and you flow with it. It is not easy to return to the roots. “It takes a lot of willpower and a lot of courage, and I don’t know if I have them,” he responded with a little shyness and embarrassment, but without losing his smile.
There was a short silence. I thought a little and took the courage to ask what was already floating in the air:
-Wouldn’t you like to be a Jew again, return to the bosom of your people, recover history?
“I don’t know,” he answered hesitantly. It takes a lot of courage, a lot of willpower. Maybe somedayโฆ
-And besides the stories and legends of your grandfather, is there anything else that testifies to your origin? -I asked again inquisitorially.
-There is an old trunk that I kept in the basement. Sometimes I open it and touch the objects; I don’t recognize all of them. It is the precious treasure of the family that I guard jealously. I don’t know what’s authentic about those old objects, but I preserve them with care. They are pieces of ancient parchment with Hebrew letters a little erased by time, some leather boxes, old bronze and silver utensils whose meaning I do not know. My grandfather Zacarรญas used to say that they are sacred and ancient objects, that they come from Granada, Seville and other places in Spain and Portugal. They were brought by our ancestors from old Europe and hidden from the inquisitors, preserved in secret and passed down from generation to generation as the great treasure of our family. To me, the trunk was given to me on the day I turned thirteen, with the promise to take care of it and pass it on to my children or grandchildren.
I closed my eyes for a moment and imagined the old trunk. I carefully touched the parchments and tried to decipher the half-erased Hebrew letters. I excitedly touched the faded leather of the phylacteries, the dark copper and blackened silver of the ancient candelabras and mezuzot. But the janitor suddenly appeared in front of me, who kindly requested my presence.
-Mr. Rubin, your taxi is waiting for you there, in the rain. If you don’t hurry, you’ll be late for the airport. Please note that at this time the traffic is very heavy, and with the rain the trip may be delayed.
We said goodbye effusively. Aron did not offer me his card with the address and telephone number, as expected, and maybe that’s why I didn’t give him mine either. The “Shalom” pronounced now more clearly than at the beginning of our meeting had a stronger meaning than then.
Comfortably sitting in the taxi, on the way to the airport and in the middle of a heavy tropical rain, I kept seeing an old trunk full of treasures from Granada.
Traducciones del espaรฑol al idish, con otras al inglรฉs/
Translations from Spanish into Yiddish, with others into English ___________________________
Karina Lerman
Crear el libro:
La idea del libro pensado al modo de una antologรญa -como una especie de tejido viviente surgiรณ en plena รฉpoca de cuarentena. En esos tiempos de tanta incertidumbre y aturdimiento intentรฉ conectarme con algo mรกs personal y placentero que me llevรณ al estudio de un curso: prรกcticas y poรฉticas de la judeidad, a cargo de la coordinaciรณn de Susana Skura y equipo dentro de un programa de extensiรณn universitaria de la UBA(Argentina). Una exquisita labor a travรฉs de la cual el idish, como pieza sensible, brillaba en todas sus expresiones artรญsticas (teatro, literatura, material archivรญstico, mรบsica etc). Allรญ, sin saberlo, la docente de mรบsica idish Yasmin Garfunkel serรญa la traductora oficial de este proyecto que llevรณ 3 aรฑos. Proyecto transitado con muchos bemoles, altibajos, desesperanza; y gracias a la apuesta y tozudez personal y la valentรญa y amorosidad de la traductora pudo llevarse a cabo y ver la luz. La idea de la convocatoria era pesquisar, no sรณlo autoras judรญas, sino poรฉticas que tuvieran un recorrido vital relacionado con la judeidad; no necesariamente con el idish en su especificidad, pero sรญ cierta historia afectiva y de pensamiento para con ello. Fue precioso convocarlas y dialogar con cada una: largas charlas, grandes emociones recordando cuestiones personales que las reconectaban con la lengua del idish (si bien la mayorรญa no habla ni lee en idish). Asรญ, se sumaron autoras de diversas latitudes (Argentina, Mรฉxico, Venezuela). Demรกs aclarar que durante el proceso de la antologรญa dos autoras fallecieron; pero fue muy conmovedor encontrarse con la empatรญa de los familiares para colaborar y participar. A quienes tambiรฉn agradezco.Agrego que pueden contactarme a kariler1214@gmail.com para acercarse a la antologรญa que es de carรกcter digital y gratuito.
_______________________________
Karina Lerman
Creating a book:
The idea of โโthe book thought of as an anthology – as a kind of living tissue – emerged in the middle of quarantine time. In these times of so much uncertainty and daze I tried to connect with something more personal and pleasant that led me to study of a course: practices and poetics of Jewishness, in charge of the coordination of Susana Skura and team within a UBA university extension program (Argentina). An exquisite work through which Yiddish, as a sensitive piece, shone in all its artistic expressions (theater, literature, archival material, music, etc.). There, without knowing this, Yiddish music teacher Yasmin Garfunkel would be the official translator of this project that took 3 years. Project traveled with many flats, ups and downs, hopelessness; and thanks to the commitment and personal stubbornness and the bravery and love of the translator was able to be carried out and see the light. the idea of โโthe call was to research, not only Jewish authors, but also poetic ones who had a vital journey related to Jewishness; not necessarily with Yiddish in their specificity, but a certain emotional and thought history towards it. It was beautiful to contact them and dialogue with each one: long talks, great emotions remembering personal issues that reconnected them with the Yiddish language (although most did not speak or read in Yiddish). Thus, authors from different latitudes joined in (Argentina, Mexico,Venezuela). Two authors died during the anthology process; but it was very moving to find the empathy of the family members to collaborate and participate. To whom I also thank. I add that you can contact me at kariler1214@gmail.com to get closer to the anthology which is digital and free.
Karina Lerman, Curadora de/Curator of La lengua en fllgrana
Karina Lerman. Poeta, psicoanalista, maestra de idioma hebreo y docente universitaria. Artista visual. Editรณ Las hijas de Lot (2018), Perlas, (2022) y la antologรญa Cรณmo decir, (2019). Primera menciรณn del premio Adolfo Bioy Casares (2019) con su poemario Cayupรกn. Y narrarรกs a tus hijos por el Centro Ana Frank de Argentina. Compiladora y curadora de la antologรญa digital Enhebradas, de una poiesis psicoanalรญtica en tiempos de pandemia (2021, 2023); la Antologรญa Mujeres en voz (2022). La antologรญa poรฉtica digital De pรฉrdidas y duelo. Cartografรญa de los cuerpos, (2023) y Costuras de la palabra (2023). La antologรญa al idish La lengua en filigrana (2023). Ha sido traducida al mapuzungรบn, griego e idish.
________________________________
Karina Lerman. Poet, psychoanalyst, Hebrew language teacher and university professor. Visual artist. She edited Las hijas de Lot (2018), Perlas (2022) and the anthology Cรณmo decir, (2019). First mention of the Adolfo Bioy Casares award (2019) with her collection of poems Cayupรกn. Y narrarรกs a tus hijos for the Anne Frank Center in Argentina. Compiler and curator of the anthology Enhebradas: de una poiesis psicoanalรญtica en tiempos de pandemia, (2021, 2023); the anthologies Y narrarรกs a tus hijos (2022), Mujeres en voz, (2023) and De pรฉrdidas y duelo. Cartografรญa de los cuerpos (2023)and Costuras de la palabra (2023). The Yiddish anthology La lengua en filigrana (2023). Her work been translated into Mapuzungun, Greek and Yiddish.
[1] Mikvah: es el espacio donde se realizan los baรฑos de purificaciรณn que prescribe el judaรญsmo. La mikvah no puede estar llena con agua estancada, sino que tiene que ser agua corriente. La palabra hace uso de las mismas raรญces en hebreo que la palabra โesperanza.โ
[1]Mikvah is the space where the purification baths prescribed by Judaism are carried out. The mikvah cannot be filled with stagnant water but must be running water. The word uses the same roots in Hebrew as the word โhope.โ
Presentaciรณn de la antologรญa/Presentation of the Anthology
________________________________
Miembros del equipo/Members of the team
Las poetas/The Poets
Raquel Jaduszliwer naciรณ en San Fernando, Pcia. de Buenos Aires.Psicoanalista. Reside en Buenos Aires. En poesรญa publicรณ poemarios entre2012 y 2023.ย Integrรณ diversas antologรญas.ย Publicรณ una nouvelle. Obtuvo varios premios nacionales eย internacionales.
Karina Lerman Vea arriba.
Laura Fuksman naciรณ en Buenos Aires. Es mรฉdica clรญnica y terapeuta corporal. Coordina Encuentros de Movimiento y Experimentaciรณn Corporal y Laboratorio de Recursosย Expresivos. Publicรณ diversos poemarios entre los aรฑos 2016-2021. Participรณ en antologรญas.ย
Celina Feuerstein naciรณ en Buenos Aires. Es Licenciada en Psicologรญa.Trabaja comoย psicoanalista. Poeta. Tiene textos en verso y prosa poรฉtica. Publicรณ poemarios entre 2018 y 2022. Sus poemas se publicaron en antologรญas.ย
_______________________
ย Raquel Jaduszliwer was born in San Fernando, Province of Buenos Aires. Psychoanalyst. She resides in Buenos Aires. She published books of poetry between 2012 and 2023. Her poems appear in several anthologies. She published a novel. She has won several national and international awards.
Karina Lerman See above.
Laura Fuksman was born in Buenos Aires. She is a clinical doctor and body therapist at Body Movement and Experimentation and Expressive Resources Laboratory. She published several collections of poems between the years 2016-2021. Her work is found in anthologies.
Celina Feuerstein was born in Buenos Aires. She has a degree in Psychology. He works as a psychoanalyst. Poet, with texts in verse and poetic prose. He published poetry collections between 2018 and 2022. Her poems were published in anthologies.
__________________________
Jefa de los traductores al idish/Head of the translators into Yiddish
Yasmin Garfunkel es cantante, docente e investigadora especializada en el idioma y cultura รญdish. Como cantante ha realizado conciertos en Buenos Aires, Rio de Janeiro, Ciudad de Mรฉxico y Tel Aviv. Junto a Federico Garber en el piano, con quien conforma el dรบo โGarfunkel Gaberโ, ha recibido premios del Instituto de Mรบsica Judaica de Brasil en el marco del Kleztival, y en el concurso โIdisher Idolโ, llevado a cabo en la ciudad de Mรฉxico. Colabora con la banda klezmer Peretz Garcik dirigida por Juliรกn Brenlle. Como docente ha brindado talleres de canciones en รญdish en la Universidad de Tel Aviv, para alumnos de la Universidad de Columbia de Nueva York y del Comitรฉ Central Israelita del Uruguay
__________________________ย ย ย ย
Yasmin Garfunkel is a singer, teacher and researcher specialized in the Yiddish language and culture. As a singer he has performed concerts in Buenos Aires, Rio de Janeiro, Mexico City and Tel Aviv. Together with Federico Garber on the piano, with whom he forms the duo โGarfunkel Gaberโ, she has received awards from the Institute of Jewish Music of Brazil within the framework of the Kleztival, and in the โIdisher Idolโ contests, held in the city of Mexico. she collaborates with the klezmer band Peretz Garcik directed by Juliรกn Brenlle. As a teacher, she has offered Yiddish song workshops at Tel Aviv University, for students at Columbia University in New York and the Central Jewish Committee of Uruguay.
Daniela Roitstein naciรณ en Buenos Aries. “Escritora, editora, comunicadora. Profesora de estudios hebreos y judaicos. Me especializo en comunicaciรณn escrita y redes sociales. Soy autora de la novela Escote hombre publicada en Chile, y obtuve premios literarios en Argentina y Australia, tanto en textos de no ficciรณn como de ficciรณn. Soy cofundadora y directora de Editorial Furtiva. He traducido textos del inglรฉs al espaรฑol. Soy Licenciada en Derecho por la UB de Buenos Aires, y Postgrado en Comunicaciรณn y Periodismo. de la Universidad Hebrea de Jerusalรฉn. Hablo hebreo e inglรฉs con fluidez. Comunicaciรณn y Periodismo de la Universidad Hebrea de Jerusalรฉn. Hablo hebreo e inglรฉs con fluidez”.โโ Desde su pรกgina de Facebook.
Daniela Roitstein was born in Buenos Aires. “Writer, editor, communicator. Professor of Hebrew and Judaic studies. I specialize in written communication and social networks. I am the author of the novel Escote masculino published in Chile, and I was awarded literary prizes in Argentina and Australia, both in non-fiction and fiction texts. I am co-founder and director of Editorial Furtiva. I have translated texts from English to Spanish. I have a Law degree from the UB in Buenos Aires, and a Postgraduate Degree in Communication and Journalism from the Hebrew University of Jerusalem. I am fluent in Hebrew and English.”โโโFrom her Facebook page.
Despuรฉs del incendio fui una vez a la sinagoga. Era viernes a la noche, habรญa salido la primera estrella y un impulso entre atรกvico y moderno me llevรณ al templo de mi juventud.
En medio de la crisis econรณmica habรญa resurgido en Buenos Aires una tendencia a la religiosidad practicante.
El Antiguo Testamento es una fascinaciรณn para mรญ. Sรฉ que Eva naciรณ de la costilla de Adรกn, que Caรญn matรณ a Abel y que Esav se perdiรณ por un plato de lentejas. Pero, ademรกs de los relatos bรกsicos, me atrapan los personajes menores. Del relato de Job, por ejemplo โel sufriente sin motivo, el conejillo de Indias de Diosโ mi preferido es Elihรบ: un personaje que aparece apenas perfilado, joven testigo del sufrimiento de Job que acude silencioso al drama. Elihรบ, que escucha atento y calla. El que cuando ve que las palabras de los Sabios no prosperan y que Job las rebate con argumentos que los deja mudos, se convierte en orador incisivo. Nace. Puedo imaginarlo con su tรบnica larga y una mirada avivada de color azul como el Mediterrรกneo. Es รฉl quien le reprocha a Job ยซยฟpiensas ser mรกs justo que Dios?ยป, dejando en claro que ve lo que otros ignoran: el mayor pecado del supuesto justo es su soberbia. Elihรบ conoce a Job. Sabe de รฉl. Cuando Job afirma: ยซHabรญa hecho yo un pacto con mis ojos y no miraba a ninguna doncellaยป, ยฟquรฉ habrรก pensado Elihรบ? ยกUna mentira y una injuria para el gรฉnero masculino, mi queridรญsimo Job! ยกUna invitaciรณn a que te despreciemos, por hacerles creer a nuestras mujeres que semejantes pactos son siquiera factibles!
Job me era indiferente. A quien yo admiraba era a Elihรบ.
Eso, junto con ciertos recuerdos de infancia, hicieron el resto del camino.
El frรญo habรญa guardado a los judรญos de Belgrano en el calor de sus casas calefaccionadas y no รฉramos muchos los feligreses. Me sentรฉ bien al fondo, en una fila de sillas azules en la que no habรญa nadie mรกs. Siempre olรญa a reciรฉn pintado allรญ. La alfombra, tambiรฉn azul, obraba maravillas para contrarrestar la frialdad que generaba el gran tamaรฑo del lugar. Era desconcertante que solo se llenara de verdad en las Altas Fiestas. Para esas fechas yo iba al templo que solรญan ir mis abuelos, el de la calle Cosio, donde nadie rezaba mucho, pero tampoco simulaba hacerlo. Indescifrables hilos unรญan las palabras sagradas que los viejos decรญan a destiempo, mientras las viejas intercambiaban recetas de strudel de manzana y el dato de la pescaderรญa en la que molรญan mejor el pescado, la cebolla y la zanahoria para el guefilte fish. Cosio era el รบtero, Belgrano el corazรณn. Yo, quemadas mis cosas, necesitaba recuperar mi ritmo cardiaco, sentirme vivo. Me llevaron mis piernas hasta la fila donde me sentaba cuando llegaba tarde, aunque esta vez eran reciรฉn las siete y media y รฉramos pocos. Era temprano pero tarde, muy tarde; en algรบn lugar era muy tarde para mรญ. Tomรฉ el libro de rezos. Mis manos sudaban sin motivo. Me las sequรฉ en los costados de mi Leviโs 501, el mรกs clรกsico de la marca, que adquirรญ en la primera compra grande que hice con Laura para reaprovisionarme. Vestirme con un 501 era reafirmar lo existente, saber que el cielo no habรญa caรญdo. Para arriba me habรญa puesto una Lacoste rosa, regalo de Norita: No te hubieras molestado, Norita/ยซPero necesitรกs ropa, Ignacio, y ademรกs la comprรฉ en ofertaยป/Esa frase se esperarรญa que la diga yo, Norita/Se sonrรญe, cรณmplice, y me abraza.
Sonaron los acordes anunciando la entrada del rabino; en los รบltimos aรฑos la gente tomรณ la costumbre de ponerse de pie para recibirlo, como si fuera el Santo Padre. Yo no, siempre me incomodaron las jerarquรญas. Me quedรฉ sentado y me sentรญ pequeรฑo viendo desde mi รบltima fila las espaldas de toda la congregaciรณn de pie frente al altar. dio miedo y yo apuraba mis pasos torpes para no detenerme demasiado frente a รฉl. ยฟQuรฉ ven que yo no veo? ยฟQuรฉ miran? ยฟSerรก quรฉ me estoy perdiendo el fin del mundo? La espera de Oelze, artista de la dรฉcada del treinta que mi abuelo admiraba a pesar de su origen alemรกn, que pendรญa majestuoso sobre la cรณmoda de estilo de la casa, se quemรณ con todas mis otras cosas. Mi mamรก quiso dรกrmelo cuando muriรณ mi padre. Recuerdo un detalle del cuadro en el que una mujer y un hombre parecieran estar desertando de la escena. Si siguieran caminando tropezarรญan el uno con el otro, pero el misterio de los cuadros reside, justamente, en su quietud. De chico pensaba que el hombre lo sabรญa todo y por eso huรญa. ยฟY ella? Entendรญa algo que los demรกs solo alcanzaban a atisbar. Huรญa a conciencia.
Sobrecogido me hundรญ en la silla azul. Por instinto me toquรฉ la cabeza confirmando que todo โpelos y kipรกโ estaba en su lugar. Con ese gesto, una mujer sentada a cierta distancia de mรญ creyรณ que la estaba saludando y me sonriรณ con una familiaridad que me incomodรณ. No lograba ubicarla en ningรบn compartimento de mi memoria. Con su mano derecha, con breves sacudidas espasmรณdicas de su palma, bajito y apenas por encima de su ombligo, me saludรณ, como una adolescente contenta. Agucรฉ la vista mientras hacรญa una mueca, mezcla de sonrisa y estornudo reprimido, un enjambre de movimientos con mi cabeza, ojos y manos para disimular el olvido con un saludo cordial. La que me saludaba no era una visiรณn del famoso cuadro sino una mujer entre robusta y contundente vestida de verde, con cartera verde, zapatos verdes y un pequeรฑo paรฑuelo alrededor del cuello. El pelo negro lacio y corto, y anillos verdes, pulseras verdes y uรฑas muy largas. Maquillaje en los pรกrpados del mismo color. ยฟDe dรณnde la conocรญa? Seguรญ el servicio religioso en una especie de trance, ya que por algรบn motivo que yo a conciencia ignoraba, la apariciรณn me habรญa encendido una reserva de energรญa de la que carecรญa desde el incendio. Me ponรญa de pie y sentรญa su mirada en mis omรณplatos. Me volvรญa a sentar y veรญa su sonrisa, pero la sonrisa seductora era ahora como de abuela, de amiga de mi madre, como diciendo ยซcuรกnto has cambiadoยป. O ยซno cambiaste nadaยป. Lo mismo da: una sonrisa de alguien que no me ve hace mucho tiempo.
Poco a poco, la sinagoga se fue llenando, la gente ocupรณ los asientos de siempre, como si fueran entradas de cine numeradas. Allรก la que tiene una hija bulรญmica, pero lo esconde. Mรกs a la izquierda, de traje a rayas y zapatos lustrados en la calle Florida, el dueรฑo de la importadora de televisores. A su lado, el del quebrado Banco Patricios, impasible, seguido de una rubia envuelta en una remera de color plata que le marca rollos desagradables. A todos, todos, los conocรญa mรกs o menos bien, en sus miserias y glorias. Pero la mujer de verde se me escapaba del fichero. Cuando abrieron las puertas del arca donde estรกn guardadas las Torot, disponiรฉndonos a cantar la plegaria Aleinu, en la pรกgina ciento cuarenta seis de nuestros sidurim, y quedaron a la vista las sagradas escrituras en rollos vestidos de hilos dorados y plateados, se elevรณ mi espรญritu. Quien no ha visto nunca la recรกmara de la sinagoga abierta de par en par, mostrando los rollos de los cinco libros de Moisรฉs engalanados, no ha visto nada aรบn. El Pueblo del Libro ataviaba a su obra magna con corona y vestido de reina. Y en el interior, la palabra. Los allรญ presentes estiramos nuestros brazos en sรญmbolo de respeto, besando de lejos el texto, reverenciando en ese beso la tradiciรณn y, por quรฉ no, una cierta magia. Era el momento de pedir, esa era la costumbre en mi familia. Resultaba un poco pagano, como si reverenciรกramos al becerro de oro, pero funcionaba. Cerrรฉ mis ojos y me conectรฉ con una parte de mรญ que solo se me revelaba en esas circunstancias. Lo normal hubiera sido pedir algo cercano a: Dios, dame fuerzas, ayudame a salir adelante, a no deprimirme y a recuperar todas mis cosas. Pero en lugar de ello, pedรญ: Dios, me siento mal pero no abatido, solo quiero saber quiรฉn soy ahora. No permitas que recupere mis viejas cosas.
En el balanceo natural de quienes estรกn rezando, mis pies se despegaban del suelo medio centรญmetro hacia adelante, hacia atrรกs, hacia adelante, hacia atrรกs, de forma automรกtica y sin ninguna intenciรณn de mi parte de sumarme a los pรกjaros danzantes. Era solo una inercia del cuerpo que resultaba bastante ventajosa.
After the fire I went to the synagogue once. It was Friday night, the first star had risen and an impulse somewhere between atavistic and modern took me to the temple of my youth.
Amid the economic crisis, a tendency toward practicing religiosity had reemerged in Buenos Aires.
The Old Testament is a fascination for me. I know that Eve was born from Adam’s rib, that Cain killed Abel and that Esau was lost over a plate of lentils. But, in addition to the basic stories, the minor characters captivate me. From the story of Job, for example โ the sufferer without reason, God’s guinea pig โ my favorite is Elihu: a character who appears barely outlined, a young witness of Job’s suffering who comes silently to the drama. Elihu, who listens attentively and remains silent. He who, when he sees that the words of the Wise Men do not prosper and that Job refutes them with arguments that leave them mute, becomes an incisive speaker. Born. I can imagine him with his long robe and a lively look of blue like the Mediterranean. It is he who reproaches Job “do you think you are more just than God?”, making it clear that he sees what others ignore: the greatest sin of the supposedly righteous is his pride. Elihu meets Job. He know about him. When Job states: “I had made a covenant with my eyes and looked at no maiden,” what must Elihu have thought? A lie and an insult to the male gender, my dearest Job! An invitation for us to despise you, for making our women believe that such pacts are even feasible!
I was indifferent to Job. The one I admired was Elihu.
That, along with certain childhood memories, made it the rest of the way.
The cold had kept the Jews of Belgrano in the warmth of their heated houses and there were not many of us parishioners. I sat at the back, in a row of blue chairs where there was no one else. It always smelled freshly painted there. The carpet, also blue, worked wonders to counteract the coldness generated by the large size of the place. It was disconcerting that it only really filled up on the High Holidays. Around that time, I went to the temple that my grandparents used to go to, the one on Cosio Street, where no one prayed much, but they didn’t pretend to do so either. Indecipherable threads united the sacred words that the old men said at the wrong time, while the old women exchanged recipes for apple strudel and the information about the fishmonger where they best ground the fish, onion and carrot for the guefilte fish. Cosio was the womb, Belgrano the heart. With my things burned, I needed to get my heart rate back, to feel alive. My legs carried me to the row where I sat when I was late, although this time it was only seven thirty and there were few of us. It was early but late, very late; somewhere it was too late for me. I took the prayer book. My hands were sweating for no reason. I dried them on the sides of my Levi’s 501, the brand’s most classic, which I acquired on the first big purchase I made with Laura to restock. Dressing in a 501 was reaffirming what existed, knowing that the sky had not fallen. Upstairs I had worn a pink Lacoste, a gift from Norita: You wouldn’t have bothered, Norita/”But you need clothes, Ignacio, and I also bought them on sale”/That phrase would be expected from me, Norita/He smiles, complicit, and hugs me.
The chords sounded announcing the rabbi’s entrance; In recent years people have taken to standing up to receive him, as if he were the Holy Father. Not me, hierarchies always bothered me. I stayed seated and felt small watching from my last row the backs of the entire congregation standing in front of the altar. It was scary and I hurried my clumsy steps so as not to stop too long in front of him. What do you see that I don’t see? What are they looking at? Am I missing the end of the world? The wait for Oelze, an artist from the 1930s that my grandfather admired despite his German origin, who hung majestically over the style chest of drawers in the house, burned up with all my other things. My mother wanted to give it to me when my father died. I remember a detail of the painting in which a woman and a man seemed to be leaving the scene. If they continued walking, they would trip over each other, but the mystery of the paintings lies precisely in their stillness. As a child I thought that man knew everything and that’s why I ran away. And she? She understood something that others could only glimpse. I consciously fled.
Overwhelmed I sank into the blue chair. Instinctively I touched my head confirming that everything โ hair and kippah โ was in place. With that gesture, a woman sitting at a distance from me thought I was greeting her and smiled at me with a familiarity that made me uncomfortable. I couldn’t locate it in any compartment of my memory. With her right hand, with brief spasmodic shakes of her palm, low and barely above her navel, she greeted me, like a happy teenager. I squinted as I made a grimace, a mixture of a smile and a repressed sneeze, a swarm of movements with my head, eyes, and hands to hide the forgetfulness with a cordial greeting. The one who greeted me was not a vision of the famous painting, but a robust and forceful woman dressed in green, with a green purse, green shoes, and a small scarf around her neck. Short straight black hair, and green rings, green bracelets, and very long nails. Makeup on the eyelids of the same color. Where did you know her from? I followed the religious service in a kind of trance, since for some reason that I was consciously unaware of, the apparition had ignited a reserve of energy in me that I had lacked since the fire. I would stand up and feel her gaze on my shoulder blades. I would sit down again and see her smile, but the seductive smile was now like that of a grandmother, of my mother’s friend, as if to say, “how much you have changed.” Or “you didn’t change anything.” It doesn’t matter: a smile from someone who hasn’t seen me in a long time.
Little by little, the synagogue filled up, people occupied the usual seats, as if they were numbered movie tickets. There is the one who has a bulimic daughter but hides it. Further to the left, in a striped suit and polished shoes on Florida Street, the owner of the television importer. At his side, the man from the bankrupt Banco Patricios, impassive, followed by a blonde wrapped in a silver T-shirt that gives him unpleasant impressions. They knew everyone, everyone, more or less well, in their miseries and glories. But the woman in green escaped my file. When they opened the doors of the ark where the Torot are kept, preparing to sing the Aleinu prayer, on page one hundred and forty-six of our siddurim, and the sacred scriptures came into view in scrolls dressed in gold and silver threads, my spirit was lifted. . . He who has never seen the chamber of the synagogue wide open, showing the scrolls of the five books of Moses decorated, has not seen anything yet. The People of the Book adorned their magnum opus with a crown and a queen’s dress. And inside, the word. Those present stretched out our arms as a symbol of respect, kissing the text from afar, reverence in that kiss the tradition and, why not, a certain magic. It was time to ask, that was the custom in my family. It was a bit pagan, like we were worshiping the golden calf, but it worked. I closed my eyes and connected with a part of me that was only revealed to me in those circumstances. The normal thing would have been to ask for something close to: God, give me strength, help me move forward, not get depressed and get all my things back. But instead, I asked: God, I feel bad but not down, I just want to know who I am now. Don’t let me get my old things back.
In the natural balance of those who are praying, my feet left the ground half a centimeter forward, backward, forward, backward, automatically and without any intention on my part to join the dancing birds. It was just an inertia of the body that was quite advantageous.
Carlos Szwarcer es historiador, periodista y cuentista judรญo-argentino. Es especialista en la historia de los sefardรญes en la Argentina y ha coleccionado muchos testimonios orales de la gente vieja sefaradรญ de los barrios de Buenos Aires.
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Carlos Szwarcer is an -Argentine Jewish historian, journalist and short-story writer. He is a specialist in the history of Sephardic Jews of Argentina, and he has collected many oral testimonies from older people in Sephardic neighborhoods of Buenos Aires.
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Caminata otoรฑal -regreso a la inocencia-
Por Carlos Szwarcer
Cerrรณ la puerta de la pensiรณn en la que mal vivรญa y se echรณ a andar. Le habรญan dado un lugar para dormir gracias a la gestiรณn de un influyente sefaradรญ que se apiadรณ de รฉl. Estaba abatido. No podรญa creer que su malhadada existencia galopara desbocada por senderos tan antojadizos. โUna bien, otra mal, una bien, otra malโฆโ, pensaba. Arrastrando sus pies, cambiรณ su habitual recorrido, sin motivo alguno. Esta vez encarรณ la calle Gurruchaga hacia la izquierda. Mirรณ hacia la vereda de enfrente. Dos รกngeles de estuco lo observaban con misericordia desde los altos muros de la Iglesia San Bernardo.
โยกQuรฉ gameo! ยฟQuiรฉn me habrรก dicho que me meta en el negocio de las licitaciones? Yo sabรญa que me iba a pasar esto. Vender camisas, tocar el cielo, casa nueva, auto รบltimo modelo, guita[1]โฆ Y despuรฉs, como siempre, ยกperder todo!se decรญa, repasando sus รบltimos aรฑos, moviendo la cabeza hacia uno y otro lado y apretรกndose los labios entrecortando ese rezongo que le brotaba como quejosa plegaria.
Dos chicos que volvรญan a sus casas desde el Colegio Herrera lo observaron y se codearon. Su aspecto era lo suficientemente extraรฑo como para llamar la atenciรณn. Habรญa salido de esa pensiรณn-geriรกtrico tan ensimismado como desalineado; ni se habรญa peinado. Su cabello, otrora renegrido, encanecido demasiado rรกpidamente desde la muerte de su esposa, mostraba cientos de pelos parados como un cepillo viejo y escarchado. Josรฉ percibiรณ esas miradas raras, frunciรณ el ceรฑo y atinรณ a aplastarse con la mano derecha su abundante y desprolija pelambre, volviendo tan profundamente a sus embarullados pensamientos que no advirtiรณ las risotadas juveniles a su espalda.
En la esquina de la calle Murillo se frenรณ instintivamente poco antes de llegar al cordรณn de la vereda. Vaya a saber por quรฉ caprichos de su mente apareciรณ la inesperada y brillante imagen de su abuela fumando aquellos cigarros negros que apestaban el aire del inquilinato. Linda, robusta, peleadora. Hasta habรญa acuchillado a un turco allรก en Esmirna. Tuvo que hacerse respetar e ingeniรกrselas para darle de comer a sus tres hijos. En Turquรญa, su marido, Jaim, cumpliรณ cinco aรฑos de servicio militar y fue larga su ausencia durante la guerra. A Josรฉ le contaron que sus familiares vinieron a Buenos Aires desde el sector mรกs pobre del Karatash, el barrio judรญo de Esmirna, y que su abuelo demostrรณ tempranamente quiรฉn era, como para que no quedaran dudas: perdiรณ la pilcha[2] del casorio[3]jugรกndosela a los dados. Josรฉ mostraba su pรญcara sonrisa cuando tenรญa la ocasiรณn de explicar su teorรญa: la descendencia masculina heredarรญa de aquel patriarca familiar esa irresistible inclinaciรณn por el juego. En charla de amigos, ademรกs, reconocรญa con orgullo el carรกcter fuerte y pendenciero de su abuela, la que habรญa dado tanto que hablar a medio barrio. Cรณmo se peleaba esa mujer con los vecinos, sentada en su destartalada silla de mimbre en la vereda, alardeando con su infaltable cigarro negro a un costado de la boca y seรฑalando con el dedo รญndice. Nadie se le atrevรญa.
โยกQuรฉ tiemposโฆ! โmurmurรณ Josรฉ, emprendiendo absurdamente el cruce de Murillo a ciegas. Una bocina desesperada y el escandaloso ruido de los frenos de una camioneta Ford 400 lo ensordecieron hasta paralizarlo. El paragolpes metรกlico estaba a no mรกs de un centรญmetro de su rodilla. Se quedรณ aturdido y temblando. โยกQuรฉ torpeza la mรญa!โ, rumiรณ asustado.
โยกImbรฉcil! ยฟCรณmo te largรกs a cruzar de golpe? ยฟTe querรฉs matar? โlo increpรณ el conductor del vehรญculo.
Josรฉ, casi sin entender quรฉ le habรญa sucedido, recorriรณ la otra mitad de la calle, pero ahora con sus ojos exageradamente abiertos y abotargados clavados en la figura del joven que aรบn le gritaba por la ventanilla de la Ford. Su corazรณn agitado le percutรญa en la garganta y se balanceรณ sobre el cordรณn de la vereda como si estuviera sobre una baldosa enjabonada. Se recompuso, sacudiรณ la cabeza y tomรณ conciencia de que estuvo a punto de perder su frรกgil vida.
โยฟPero estoy charpeado, en dรณnde tengo el meoio? โexclamรณ apretรกndose las manos y mirando el cielo demasiado celeste.
Dio unos pasos y, tal vez porque instintivamente sabรญa que no habรญa peligro inmediato en los prรณximos cien metros โhasta la prรณxima esquinaโ, volviรณ a meterse de lleno en el tรบnel de los recuerdos mientras caminaba. Que lo echaran de la casa de su hijo era lo รบltimo que hubiera esperado. โยฟPor quรฉ no habrรฉ sacado el carรกcter temerario de mi abuela y atreverme a ponerle un cuchillo en el cuello a mi nueraโฆ, ยฟcรณmo pudo tratarme como un perro?โ, rezongรณ. โNoโฆ estas reacciones no son de gente como yo. ยฟQuรฉ me estรก pasando?โ, se sorprendiรณ de sus disparatados razonamientos. โยกEn quรฉ jal vinimos!โ[4], solรญa decir su abuela para expresar los malos momentos, y a Josรฉ le rondaron estas antiguas y lejanas palabras. Sentรญa amargamente que en el รบltimo tramo de su vida se encontraba en una humillante situaciรณn que no creรญa merecer. De chico habรญa sido rebelde, buscavidas, peleador, pero los aรฑos lo amansaron; los infalibles porrazos en su camino y su mala estrea fueron domando, de a poco, su carรกcter dรญscolo, restos de una remota osadรญa. Estaba entregado. En los รบltimos tiempos se sentรญa como aquel barrilete de su niรฑez al que se le cortรณ el hilo y fue llevado por el vientoโฆ hacia ningรบn lugar.
Al llegar a la esquina de Padilla decidiรณ abandonar por un momento sus pensamientos y mirรณ la calle antes de cruzar. Dejรณ pasar un micro naranja con niรฑos que iban o venรญan de algรบn colegio cercano, esta vez con los pies firmes apoyados en el cordรณn y, ya sin vehรญculos cercanos, apurรณ el paso y cruzรณ. Al llegar a la mitad de la cuadra escuchรณ la voz estridente de Roberto, su amigo de juergas, que le gritaba desde la entrada del mercadito de enfrente: โEh, Josรฉ, ยฟvas al Cafรฉ San Bernardo?โ.
โNo, no tengo un mango[5]para morfar[6]โฆno voy a ir al cafรฉ a jugar a las cartasโle contestรณ, arreglรกndose otra vez la cabellera y levantando la mano para saludar a su amigo.
โยกNo seas llorรณn! โle recriminรณ Roberto, que resignadamente encogiรณ los hombros y mientras se alejaba le gritรณ su frase habitualโ: ยกChau!โฆ Cheโฆ, ยกno te pierdas Josecito!
Josรฉ continuรณ su periplo en ese dรญa frรญo y esquivo, aunque el sol que le daba de frente acariciaba su rostro. Por un rato disfrutรณ de ese regalo de la naturaleza que le arrancรณ una media sonrisa de satisfacciรณn. Pero enseguida volviรณ a sumergirse en sus largas cavilaciones: โยกCuรกnta plata perdรญ en el juego, con la cuarta parte de lo que despilfarrรฉ podrรญa vivir tranquilo y no de la compasiรณn de los demรกsโฆ!โ.
Al llegar a la ochava de la calle Camargo mirรณ a la izquierda, hacia la mitad de cuadra, no habรญa nadie conocido en la puerta del Templo Sefaradรญ, excepto dos mastodontes del servicio de seguridad. Ese sitio ya no era el mismo desde los atentados a la Embajada de Israel y la AMIA: habรญan construido esos pilares para protecciรณn y tenรญa custodia permanente. Posรณ sus ojos marrones en la vereda de enfrente, en el nuevo negocio que por aรฑos fuera el almacรฉn de โmuรฑecoโ Goldfarb. โยฟQuรฉ habrรก sido de aquel flaco y pรกlido ashkenazรญ que rara vez su rostro veรญa la luz del sol? El pobre se pasaba dรญa tras dรญa parapetado detrรกs de su roja mรกquina de cortar fiambresโ, recordรณ con nostalgia.
Dejรณ pasar un colectivo 65 y cruzรณ la calle. Los cien metros siguientes hasta la gran avenida Corrientes no fueron sencillos de recorrer. La enorme red de su memoria lo atraparรญa hasta casi inmovilizarlo. Intuรญa que los recuerdos le traerรญan imรกgenes inevitables. Se dejรณ llevar lentamente por sus flacas y huesudas piernas, atraรญdo por los claroscuros de su pasado. De chico habรญa vivido en un inquilinato de esa cuadra por casi veinte aรฑos, cuando todo era distinto. Buenos Aires, Villa Crespo, la calle Gurruchagaโฆ, cรณmo habรญan cambiado, tanto como su propia vida.
Momentos de su infancia fueron pasando del sepia al color. Su padre โque habรญa hecho de todo para sobrevivirโ fue changarรญn[7]en el puerto, mozo de bodas y de cafรฉ, vendedor ambulante y โยกquรฉ gran bailarรญn!โ: por el arte de su danza armoniosa manteniendo una botella sobre la cabeza sin que se le cayera, acompaรฑรกndose con un par de cucharas marcando el ritmo oriental, tuvo cierta fama como para ganarse muchos aplausos, unos pocos pesos de propina y algunas copas sin cargo. Los รบltimos aรฑos se chupaba hasta una botella de whisky en el dรญa. Fue tan bueno como tarambana, se gastaba todo con los amigos, en el cafรฉ, en las carreras de caballos, jugando en el pรณquerโฆ hasta lo que no tenรญa.
Ese trรกgico gen familiar los persiguiรณ por generaciones. El abuelo de Josรฉ vino a โla Amerikaโ con ese vicio del juego, y un tรญo abuelo fue cรฉlebre por sus juergas desmedidas, jugosas anรฉcdotas que hasta se mencionan en algunos libros que cuentan la historia del barrio. Ni su padre fue ajeno a esta pasiรณn lรบdica y, para quรฉ negarlo, Josรฉ tampoco. ยกEse maldito gen! Pobre su madre, tuvo que rebuscรกrsela lavando ropa para los paisanos. Pero claro que era otra รฉpoca. Si no habรญa plata se las arreglaban. Ella, con un peso que le daba su esposo, hacรญa las cuatro comidas. โยกEra un milagro!โ. Comรญan โqueso rallado al tandurโ[8].โยกQuรฉ ricoโฆ, habรญa alegrรญa!โ. Derretรญan el queso con pan y lo acompaรฑaban con tรฉ y salmodiaban:โHoy cumimos, a Dios bendicimos y maรฑana veremosโ.
โYo fui felizโ, se decรญa Josรฉ y, atraรญdo por una fuerza extraรฑa que lo sacรณ abruptamente de sus elucubraciones, se detuvo frente al nรบmero 432. El local exhibรญa sus persianas marrรณn oscuro bajas y oxidadas. Era el Cafรฉ Izmir, que habรญa cerrado tiempo atrรกs. ยฟCuรกnto hacรญa que no pasaba por su frente? Los รบltimos aรฑos habรญa cambiado mucho porque se fueron muriendo los viejos turcos sefaradรญes como su padre. El local cerrado que tenรญa ante su vista habรญa perdido sus caracterรญsticas orientales y tambiรฉn la fama que supo tener en el barrio. Lo habรญan dejado deteriorarse, fue agonizando de a poco. Pero todavรญa estaba allรญ, resistiรฉndose a desaparecer del todo. Josรฉ se quedรณ duro frente a la persiana central, la mรกs angosta, la que ocultaba la doble puerta vaivรฉn de madera noble por la que habรญan pasado cientos de veces su abuelo, sus tรญos, su padre y tantos otros. Hubiera sido un pecado seguir de largo y no recordar que sus familiares contaron mรกs las horas allรญ que en sus propias casas. โยฟQuรฉ encanto habrรก tenido este sitio para atrapar tan fuertemente a los varones de mi familia?โ, se preguntรณ. รl no podรญa explicarse con exactitud quรฉ representรณ ese cafรฉ para los sefaradรญes, griegos, armenios, pero estaba seguro de que pasar, aunque sea un rato por allรญ, fue casi una obligaciรณn para todos ellos; era como ir a un templo o a una iglesia, encontraban algo de sus lejanas tierras. Se entretenรญan, jugaban a los naipes, escuchaban mรบsica, comรญan y bebรญan esos exquisitos manjares orientales, y las bailarinasโฆ ยกAhโฆ las bailarinas!, cรณmo les gustaban a sus mayores. Tantas veces su madre lo mandรณ a buscar a su padre y cuรกntas veces รฉl le contestรณ โยกVรกte de aquรญ hiyico, no fastidies!โ. Frecuentemente Josรฉ observaba de reojo el interior tras esa neblina impregnada del espeso humo de tabaco fuerte y de las comidas turcas, aromas imprescindibles que llegaban hasta la calle. Sus tรญos y su padre, eternos jugadores de cartas, cuando lo veรญan parado y desgarbado en el umbral de entrada mirando hacia adentro, empujaban el aire rรญtmicamente con las manos, desde el fondo del local, enviรกndole la seรฑal cotidiana: โno molestesโ. Tampoco conseguรญa que sus parientes le dieran los cinco centavos que valรญa la pelota para jugar con los pibes de la barrita de Camargo. Siempre ese ademรกn desde el fondo del cafรฉ lo invitaba a irse. Era parte de los tantos ritos cotidianos. Su madre lo volvรญa a mandar una y otra vez: โยกDile a tu padre ke ya me enfaziรณ[9], que o viene ya o se queda sin cumida!โ.
โCuรกntas cosas, ยฟno? ยฟEn quรฉ lugar estarรก guardado todo lo que pasa en la vida, Dios mรญo?โ, filosofaba abstraรญdo ante los vestigios del bar cerrado. Su abuela siempre le decรญa: โยกTรบ te akodrarรกs de tu chikez kuando peor estรฉs!โ.
Y parado como un soldado, frente al viejo y gastado umbral del Izmir, Josรฉ sintiรณ un escalofrรญo que le subiรณ desde la espalda y por los brazos hasta el cuello. Se vio sesenta aรฑos atrรกs, frente a ese mismo umbral, un gรฉlido dรญa de otoรฑo preรฑado de dignidad yhonor. Tenรญa ocho aรฑos. Salรญa del colegio camino al conventillo. En la vereda del cafรฉ escuchรณ que un metro atrรกs Simรณn, un compaรฑero ashkenazรญ, le gritaba: โยกEhโฆ sardina!โ. La inversiรณn de la tercera y cuarta letra de su apellido tenรญa el objetivo evidente de la burla, de dejarlo contrariado, le estaba diciendo โpescadoโ.
Josรฉ se dio media vuelta, tirรณ su portafolio al piso y dio comienzo a una memorable batalla que le dejarรญa una huella imborrable en el corazรณn. Los imberbes parecรญan dos feroces combatientes a muerte. Los nudillos vรญrgenes de Josecito dieron de lleno en el ojo derecho del provocador. Rรกpidamente algunos vecinos y vendedores ambulantes los rodearon y uno de ellos intentรณ separarlos, pero fue imposible. Dentro del cafรฉ estaban su abuelo, su padre y sus tรญos sentados impasibles en dos mesas, escuchando un chiftetelli de un gastado disco de pasta. Ninguno atinรณ a moverse ni cuando el pequeรฑo, la flor y nata de su linaje, recibiรณ una patada en el estรณmago que lo obligรณ a doblarse por el dolor.
Frente a las persianas bajas y mortecinas recordรณ a su padre con los brazos cruzados sentado en el ventanal, con el cigarrillo en la boca y una copa de rakรญ a medio tomar sobre la mesa, sin hacer un mรญnimo gesto cuando delante de sus propios ojos su รบnico hijo, enredado con el adversario se revolcaba por el piso. Incluso, despuรฉs le contarรญan que su progenitor frenรณ a los gritos a un parroquiano que salรญa a parar la lucha: โยกDรฉjalo!โ, habรญa ordenado secamente, โยกquรฉ se haga hombre!โ.
Con un pรกrpado hinchado y el labio inferior ensangrentado Simรณn saliรณ corriendo para evitar otra dura mano del pequeรฑo Josรฉ, que con voz llorosa y entrecortada le gritaba: โยกVenรญ, cobarde, no te escapes! ยกSardinas te voy a dar!โ. Medio maltrecho se acomodรณ el guardapolvo, mirรณ a su padre a los ojos a travรฉs del vidrio de la ventana guillotina, pero no obtuvo ni una ligera mueca de รฉl. Levantรณ su portafolio del piso mientras algunos vecinos le palmeaban la espalda por su faena: โยกBien Josรฉ, bienโฆ asรญ se hace!โ, le decรญan. Se sintiรณ casi un hombre.
Habรญa salvado el honor y la dignidad. Ese chiquito, que apenas empezaba a vivir, observรณ de soslayo a los parcos y circunspectos varones de su misma sangre reprimiendo exteriorizar el primitivo placer de la victoria de uno de su tribu. El grupo escondiรณ su alegrรญa detrรกs de extraรฑas seรฑas y ademanes contenidos que Josรฉ no lograba entender. Cuando apenas habรญa hecho unos pasos hacia el conventillo, distante a pocos metros del cafรฉ, reciรฉn ahรญ se escuchรณ un estallido de aplausos esmirlรญes: era el jolgorio djidiรณ[10]por su victoria. El tiempo le harรญa comprender la aparente indiferencia y apatรญa de su parentela durante aquel combate iniciรกtico. Esa noche su padre extraรฑamente llegรณ temprano a cenar ante la sorpresa de la familia, y despuรฉs de saludar con un grito a su esposa Rebeca, se acercรณ a Josecito y simplemente, sin decirle palabra, le manifestรณ su orgullo revolviรฉndole el pelo con sus enormes dedos รญndice y anular, apenas unos segundos, pero fue un gesto que su hijo jamรกs olvidarรญa.
โยกQuรฉ maneras tenรญan antes para decir te quieroโฆ!โ,se lamentรณ Josรฉ con la mirada colgada en el vacรญo del presente. De pronto, una hoja cayรณ del aรฑoso fresno; apenas le rozรณ la mejilla, pero le dio la sensaciรณn de un cachetazo. Se vio nuevamente frente al aรฑoso umbral del cafรฉ y advirtiรณ que dos lรกgrimas se le deslizaban, sin querer, zigzagueando entre los pelos de su breve barba de seis dรญas. Quiso ignorar el llanto que se precipitaba, pero le fue imposible, no solamente porque enseguida le llegรณ un sabor salado a su boca, sino porque aquellos dos hilos salobres se encargaron de llamar a la mar. Josรฉ comenzรณ a sollozar desconsoladamente frente al Cafรฉ Izmir. Tocรณ unos instantes la persiana herrumbrosa y en un gesto de reverencia llevรณ los dedos a sus labios y los besรณ con ternura, cerrรณ fuertemente los ojos y volviรณ a apoyar su mano en la cortina metรกlica, como si fuera un sector del Muro de los Lamentos. โยกTรบ te akodrarรกs de tu chikez kuando peor estรฉs!โ,volviรณ a escuchar las palabras sabias y premonitorias de su admirada abuela. Hizo unos pasos, mirรณ el lugar donde aรฑos atrรกs estuvo el conventillo en el que viviรณ hasta los veintitantos, y para no volverse a emocionar continuรณ su marcha hasta la avenida Corrientes.
Todavรญa aturdido, no alcanzรณ a recordar de quรฉ se lamentaba al salir de la pensiรณn, ni hacia dรณnde iba. Y con paso cansino, acompaรฑado por un pertinaz sรฉquito de รกngeles y demonios que se resistรญan a dejarlo en paz, se perdiรณ entre la gente, โcomo aquel barrilete a merced de los caprichos del vientoโฆ hacia ningรบn lugarโ.
He closed the door of the boarding house where he lived poorly and began to walk. They had provided him with a place to sleep, thanks to the management of an influential Sephardic man who took pity on him. He was dejected. He couldn’t believe that his unfortunate existence was galloping along such capricious paths. โOne good, one bad, one good, one badโฆโ he thought. Dragging his feet, for no reason, he changed his usual route, for no reason. This time he faced Gurruchaga Street on his left. He looked toward the sidewalk in front of him. Two stucco angels contemplated him with pity from the high walls of the Church of Saint Bernard.
What game! Who told me to get into the bidding at auction business? I knew this was going to happen to me. Sell โโt-shirts, touch the sky, new house, latest model car, guitaโฆ [1] And then, as always, lose it all!โ he said to himself, reviewing his last years, moving his head from side to side, and pursing his lips between breaths. That grumble that came out of him like a pitiful prayer.
Two boys who were returning home from Colegio Herrera observed him and nudge each other. His appearance was strange enough to attract attention. He had left that pension-nursing home as absorbed as he was disheveled. He hadn’t even combed her hair. His hair, once black, graying too quickly since the death of his wife, showed hundreds of hairs standing up like an old, frosted brush. Josรฉ noticed those strange looks, frowned, and managed to flatten his abundant and untidy hair with his right hand, so deeply in his confused thoughts, that he did not notice the youthful laughter behind him.
At the corner of Murillo Street, shortly before reaching the curb of the sidewalk he instinctively stopped. Who knows by what tricks of his mind the unexpected and brilliant image of his grandmother appeared– smoking those black cigarettes that reeked the air of the tenement. Pretty, robust, feisty. She had even stabbed a Turk there in Izmir. She had had to make himself respected and manage to feed her three children. In Turkey, her husband, Jaim, completed five years of military service and, during the war, was absent for a long time. They had told Josรฉ that his relatives came to Buenos Aires from the poorest sector of Karatash, the Jewish neighborhood of Izmir, and that his grandfather showed early on who he was, so that there would be no doubt: he lost the pilcha [2] of the casario \[ 3] playing dice. Josรฉ showed his mischievous smile when he had the opportunity to explain his theory: the male offspring would inherit from that family patriarch that irresistible inclination for gambling. In conversation with friends, he also proudly recognized the strong and quarrelsome character of his grandmother, who had given half the neighborhood so much to talk about. How that woman fought with the neighbors, sitting in her dilapidated wicker chair on the sidewalk, boasting with her inevitable black cigarette at the side of her mouth and pointing with her index finger. Nobody dared her.
โWhat timesโฆ! โJosรฉ murmured, absurdly crossing Murillo crossing blindly. A desperate horn and the loud noise of the brakes of a Ford 400 truck deafened him to the point of paralysis. The metal bumper was no more than a centimeter from his knee. He was left stunned and shaking. โHow clumsy I am!โ he ruminated in fear.โFool! How do cross suddenly? Do you want to kill yourself?โ the driver of the vehicle rebuked him.
Josรฉ, hardly understanding what had happened to him, walked the other half of the street, but now with his exaggeratedly open and bloated eyes fixed on the figure of the young man, still shouting at him through the Ford window. His heart pounded in his throat. and he tried to balance himself on the sidewalk, which felt like soapy tiles. He pulled himself together, shook his head, and realized that he had almost lost his fragile life.
โยฟPero estoy charpeado, en dรณnde tengo el meoio? But I’m confused, where am I?โhe exclaimed, squeezing his hands, and looking at the sky, that seemed too blue.
He took a few steps and, perhaps because he instinctively knew that there was no immediate danger in the next hundred meters, to the next corner. He plunged into the tunnel of memories as he walked. Being kicked out of his son’s house was the last thing he would have expected. โWhy couldn’t I have taken my grandmother’s reckless character and dared to put a knife to my daughter-in-law’s neck… how could she treat me like a dog?โ he grumbled. โNoโฆ these reactions do not come from people like me. What is happening to me?โ He was surprised by his crazy reasoning. โยกEn quรฉ jal vinimos!โ[4] โ his grandmother used to say to express bad times, and Josรฉ was haunted by these ancient and distant words. He bitterly felt that, in the last stretch of his life, he found himself in a humiliating situation that he did not believe he deserved. As a boy he had been a rebel, a hustler, a fighter, but the years tamed him. The unending blows in his path and his bad attitudes were taming, little by little, his wayward character, what was left of long-ago audacity. He was beaten. Recently, he felt like the kite from his childhood whose string was cut and was carried by the wind… to nowhere.
When he reached the corner of Padilla Street, he decided stop thinking for a moment and looked at the street before crossing. He let an orange bus pass by with children who were going or coming from a nearby school, this time with his feet firmly resting on the curb and, with no vehicles nearby, he quickened his pace and crossed. When he reached the middle of the block he heard the shrill voice of Roberto, his party friend, shouting to him from the entrance of the market opposite: โHey, Josรฉ, are you going to Cafรฉ San Bernardo?โ
No, I donโt have a mango[5]para morfar[6]“ I’m not going to go to the cafe to play cards,” he replied, fixing his hair again and raising his hand to greet his friend. โDon’t be a crybaby!โ Roberto reproached him. He resignedly shrugged his shoulders, and as he walked away, he shouted his usual phrase: โBye!… Hey…, don’t get lost, Josecito!โ
Josรฉ continued his journey on that cold and scornful day, though the sun shining in front of him caressed his face. For a while he enjoyed that gift of nature that made him smile with a bit of satisfaction. But he immediately plunged back into his long musings: โHow much money I lost in that game. With a quarter of what I wasted I could live in peace and not on the pity of others…!โ
When he reached the corner of Camargo Street he looked to the left, toward the middle of the block. There was no one he knew at the door of the Sephardic Temple, except for two mastodons from the security service. That site was no longer the same since the attacks on the Israeli Embassy and the AMIA. They had built those pillars for protection and had taken permanent custody of the place. He placed his brown eyes on the opposite sidewalk, at the new business that for years had been so-called Goldfarb’s store. โWhat had become of that thin and pale Ashkenazi whose face rarely saw the light of the sun? The poor guy spent day after day sheltered behind his red cold cuts slicer,โ he recalled wistfully.
He let a 65 bus pass and crossed the street. The next hundred meters to the large Corrientes Avenue were not easy to travel. The enormous net of his memory would trap him until he was almost immobilized. He sensed that memories would bring him inevitable images. He slowly let himself be carried along by his skinny, bony legs, attracted by the chiaroscuros of his past. Starting as a boy, he had lived in a tenement on that block for almost twenty years, when everything was different. Buenos Aires, Villa Crespo, Gurruchaga Street…, how they had changed, as much as his own life.
Moments of his childhood went from sepia to color. His father, who had done everything possible to survive, was a changarรญn[7] at the port, a waiter at weddings and cafes, a street vendor and โwhat a great dancer!โ: for the art of his harmonious dance, holding a bottle on hith his head without falling. Accompanied by a couple of spoons marking the oriental rhythm, he had a certain reputation for earning a lot of applause, a few pesos as a tip and some free drinks. In recent years he drank a bottle of whiskey a day. He was as good as a taramban; he spent everything with his friends, on coffee, on horse races, playing poker… even what he didn’t have.
That tragic family gene followed them for generations. Josรฉ’s grandfather came to โAmerikaโ with that gambling addiction, and a great uncle was famous for his excessive parties, juicy anecdotes even mentioned in some books tell the history of the neighborhood. Not even his father was a stranger to this playful passion and, why deny it, neither was Josรฉ. That damn gene! Poor mother, she had to earn a living washing clothes for her countrymen. But of course, it was a different time. If there was no money they made do. She, with a peso that her husband gave her, made the four meals. “It was a miracle!” They ate โ โqueso rallado al tandurโ[8].โยก โHow deliciousโฆ, there was joy!โ They melted the cheese with bread and accompanied it with tea and chanted: โToday we eat, we bless God and tomorrow we will see.โ
ย โI was happy,โ Josรฉ said to himself and, attracted by a strange force that abruptly brought him out of his musings, he stopped in front of number 432. The establishment displayed its low, rusty dark brown blinds. It was Cafรฉ Izmir, closed some time ago. How long had it been since you passed it forehead? In recent years it had changed a lot because the old Sephardic Turks, like his father were dying. The closed establishment in front of him had lost its oriental characteristics and the fame it once had in the neighborhood. They had let it deteriorate, it died little by little. But it was still there, refusing to disappear completely. Josรฉ stood hard in front of the central blind, the narrowest one, the one that hid the double swinging hardwood door, through which his grandfather, his uncles, his father and so many others had passed hundreds of times. It would have been a sin to pass by and not remember that his relatives counted the hours there more than in their own homes. โWhat charm must this place have had to hold on to the men of my family so strongly?โ he asked himself. He could not explain exactly what that cafe represented for the Sephardic, Greek, and Armenian people, but he was sure that spending even a little while there was almost an obligation for all of them; it was like going to a temple or a church. They found something from their distant lands. They entertained themselves, played cards, listened to music, ate and drank those exquisite oriental delicacies, and the dancers… Ah… the dancers! How their elders loved them. So many times, his mother sent Josรฉ to look for his father and how many times he replied, โGet out of here hiyico, don’t bother us!โ Josรฉ frequently looked out of the corner of his eye behind that fog impregnated with the thick smoke of strong tobacco and Turkish foods, essential aromas that reached the street. His uncles and his father, eternal card players, when they saw him standing ungainly on the entrance threshold looking in, they rhythmically pushed the air with their hands, from the back of the room, sending him the daily signal: โdo not disturb.โ He also couldn’t get his relatives to give him the five cents the ball cost, required to be able to play with the group of kids from Camargo Street. Always, that gesture from the back of the cafรฉ invited him to leave. It was part of the many daily rituals. His mother ordered him again and again: โTell your father that he has already angered me: [9], that either he comes now. or he is left without food!โ
ย โSo many things, right? โWhere is everything that happens in life stored, my God?โ he philosophized, while distracted in front of the vestiges of the closed bar. His grandmother always told him: โYou will yearn for your childhood warmlywhen you are worse off!โ
And standing like a soldier, in front of the old and worn threshold of Izmir, Joseph felt a chill that rose from his back and up his arms to his neck. He saw himself sixty years ago, in front of that same threshold, on a cold autumn day, full of dignity and honor. He was eight years old. He was leaving school on his way to the tenement. On the sidewalk of the cafรฉ, he heard Simรณn, an Ashkenazi fellow, shout from a meter behind him: โHeyโฆ sardine!โ The inversion of the third and fourth letters of his last name had the obvious objective of mocking him, of making him upset; he was calling him โfish.โ
Josรฉ turned around, threw his briefcase on the floor, and began a memorable battle that would leave an indelible mark on his heart. The two beardless ones looked like two fierce combatants to the death. Josecito’s virgin knuckles hit the provocateur’s right eye squarely. Quickly some neighbors and street vendors surrounded them, and one of them tried to separate them, but it was impossible. Inside the cafe were his grandfather, his father and his uncles sitting impassively at two tables, listening to a chiftetelli from a worn paste record. None of them managed to move, not even when the little boy, the cream of his lineage, received a kick in the stomach that forced him to double over in pain.
In front of the low and dim blinds he remembered his father with his arms crossed sitting at the window, with the cigarette in his mouth and a half-drunk glass of raki on the table, without making the slightest gesture when before his very eyes his only son, tangled with his adversary, was rolling on the floor. Later they would even tell him that his father shouted at a local man who was going out to stop the fight: “Leave him!” he had ordered dryly, “let him become a man!” With a swollen eyelid and a bloody lower lip, Simรณn ran to avoid another harsh hand from little Josรฉ, who with a tearful and broken voice shouted at him: โCome, coward, don’t run away! I’m going to give you sardines!โ Half battered, he adjusted his overalls, looked into his father’s eyes through the glass of the sash window, but did not get even the slightest grimace from him. He picked up his briefcase from the floor while some neighbors patted him on the back for his work: โGood Josรฉ, goodโฆ that’s how it’s done!โ they told him. He felt almost a man.
Still dazed, he couldn’t remember what he was complaining about when he left the boarding house, or where he was going. And with a weary step, accompanied by a persistent entourage of angels and demons who refused to leave him alone, he got lost among people, “like that kite at the mercy of the whims of the wind… towards nowhere at all.”
He had saved his honor and dignity. That little boy, who had just begun to live, looked askance at the restrained and circumspect men of his own blood, repressing the expression of primitive pleasure at the victory of one of his tribe. The group hid their joy behind strange signs and restrained gestures that Josรฉ could not understand. When he had barely taken a few steps towards the house, a few meters from the cafรฉ, he heard a burst of applause from Smirli: it was the djidiรณ [10], rejoicing over his victory. Time would make him understand the apparent indifference and apathy of his relatives during that initiation combat. That night his father strangely arrived early for dinner, to the family’s surprise, and after greeting his wife Rebeca with a shout, he approached Josecito and simply, without saying a word, expressed his pride by ruffling his hair with his huge fingers. index and ring finger, just a few seconds, but it was a gesture that his son would never forget.
โWhat ways did they have before to say I love youโฆ!โ Josรฉ lamented with his gaze hanging in the emptiness of the present. Suddenly, a leaf fell from the old ash tree; It barely touched his cheek, but it felt like a slap. He found himself again facing the aged threshold of the cafรฉ and noticed that two tears were slipping, involuntarily, zigzagging between the hairs of his short six-day beard. He wanted to ignore the crying that was precipitating, but it was impossible, not only because a salty taste immediately came to his mouth, but because those two salty threads were in charge of calling to the sea. Josรฉ began to sob uncontrollably in front of Cafรฉ Izmir. He touched the rusty blind for a few moments and in a gesture of reverence he brought his fingers to his lips and kissed them tenderly, he closed his eyes tightly and rested his hand again on the metal curtain, as if it were a section of the Wailing Wall. โYou will yearn for your childhood warmly when you are worse off!โ, he once again heard the wise and premonitory words of his admired grandmother. He took a few steps, looked at the place where years ago the tenement where he lived until he was in his twenties was, and so as not to get emotional again, he continued his walk to Corrientes Avenue.
Still dazed, he couldn’t remember what he was complaining about when he left the boarding house, or where he was going. And with a weary step, accompanied by a persistent entourage of angels and demons who refused to leave him alone, he got lost among the people, “like that kite at the mercy of the whims of the windโฆ towards nowhere.”
Notes:
[1] Money (from lunfardo, a criole language, once spoken in Buenos Aires).
Virginia Feinmann es escritora y traductora. Publica cuentos en Verano/12, Revista Letras Libres, Diario La Gaceta, Revista El Coloquio de los Perros (Espaรฑa), Revista Socompa. En 2016 editรณ su primer libro de ficciรณn, Toda clase de cosas posibles (Colecciรณn Mulita) y en 2018 su segundo libro, Personas que quizรกs conozcas (Emecรฉ). En 2020 coordinรณ el sitio โDiarios de Cuarentenaโ, donde mรกs de 3000 personas de distintos paรญses le dieron forma literaria al encierro pandรฉmico.Desde 2015 dicta el taller de escritura โHerramientas de la tรฉcnica narrativa: objetos, acciones y metรกforas al servicio de una historiaโ en forma independiente y para instituciones (Foro Internacional de la Fundaciรณn Mempo Giardinelli, Centro Cultural de la Memoria Haroldo Conti โEx Esma, Biblioteca de Microrrelatos Luisa Valenzuela). En 2021, a partir de su propia vivencia, le sumรณ el taller โNarrar lo imperdonable. Ocho cuentos sobre abuso sexual infantilโ (Universidad Nacional de Rosario). Varios de sus microrrelatos, de fuerte circulaciรณn en las redes sociales, han sido adaptados para radio, teatro o espectรกculos de narraciรณn oral.
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Viginia Feinmann is a writer and translator. She published stories in Verano/12, Letras Libres Magazine, La Gaceta Newspaper, El Colloquio de los Perros Magazine (Spain), Socompa Magazine. In 2016 he published his first fiction book, Toda clase de cosas posibles(Mulita Collection) and in 2018 his second book, Personas que tal vez conozcas(Emecรฉ).In 2020 he coordinated the site โQuarantine Diariesโ, where more than 3,000 people from different countries gave literary form to the pandemic confinement. Since 2015, he has taught the writing workshop โTools of narrative technique: objects, actions and metaphors at the service of a storyโ independently and for institutions (International Forum of the Mempo Giardinelli Foundation, Haroldo Conti Cultural Center of Memory โ Ex Esma , Luisa Valenzuela Microstory Library). In 2021, based on her own experience, she added the workshop โNarrating the unforgivable. Eight stories about child sexual abuseโ (National University of Rosario). Several of her short stories, widely circulated on social networks, have been adapted for radio, theater or oral storytelling shows.
3 cuentos de Virginia Feinmann/3 stories by Virginian Feinmann
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PASO A COMPRAR ALGO PARA EL CUMPLEAรOS de mi amiga. Es merienda, me digo, masas, sรกndwiches de miga de una confiterรญa linda. O pepas en ese chino. Un paquete de pepas. Dos. Dos paquetes de pepas. Y un chocolate. Sรญ, va a estar bien,
Luego, saludo, voy a la cocina. Dejo las pepas sobre la mesada y el chocolate. No lo apoyo. Lo agarro. Lo apoyo. Lo agarro de nuevo. Me llaman. Lo guardo en la mochila.
Charlo con el marido de un amigo.
–โฆ ยฟCรณmo va la Secretaria de?
–Renunciรฉ.
Viene mi amiga y me frota el brazo rapidito. Le devuelvo el mimo, pero, peroโฆ–ยฟCรณmo que renunciaste?
–Sรญ, mi jefe era un foro.
Mi asiente que el jefe era un forro.
–Peroโฆ ยฟno puedo ir yo en tu lugar?
Se rรญen. Yo no tanto. Un poco, pero de nervios.
ยฟCuรกnto tardarรญa Vir en odiar a tu jefe? โdice mi amiga.
–No lo odiarรญaโle digo yo.
–Sรญ, lo odiarรญas
–Te juro que no lo odiarรญa.
–Bueno, te pondrรญas a llorar.
No me pondrรญa a llorar, Cecilia, no me pondrรญa a llorar. O me pondrรญa a llorar, pero irรญa a trabajo igual. Trabajarรญa muy bien.
Ellos se van porque sonรณ el timbre. Yo, aunque soy vegetariana, me como seis salchichas de Viena.
Entra una chica bellรญsima. Asiรกtica. De pรณmulos altos. Envuelta en un chal violeta. Quiero ser su amiga instantรกneamente.
Me siento al lado.
Le pregunto cรณmo se llama, de dรณnde es. Thanda. De Birmania.
–ยฟY por quรฉ te viniste?
–Por el tango.
–Jajajj, what a goddess.
Nos reรญmos. Tiene unos dientes perfectos.
–Y acรก quรฉ hacรฉs?
–Toco el violรญn, en un grupo de tango, y en la filarmรณnica del Colรณn.
–Ahโฆ–dejo el manรญ sobre la mesa– ยฟy en la filarmรณnica te pagan?
–Sรญโฆ tenemos sueldo.
–Y cuรกnto te pagan, digo, te alcanza para vivir. ยฟCon la filarmรณnica vivรญs bien?
Ella se ve un poco para atrรกs. Se mensajea la yema del dedo meรฑique. Mira un costado.
Pasan todos los niรฑos del cumpleaรฑos corriendo.
Quedo sentada al lado de un seรฑor. Me dice que tengo lindos rulos.
–Gracias. ยฟY usted quรฉ hace?โ
–Tengo reparto de pollos.โ
–ยฟY cรณmo es el reparto de pollos, se vive con eso? O sea, usted reparte el pollo yโฆ
Apagan las luces. Viene la torta. Le cantamos el feliz cumpleaรฑos a mi amiga.
Me ofrezco a cortar. Corto cuadraditos chiquititos y los voy poniendo en media servilleta cada uno. Mis amigos se rรญen –ยกSon muy chiquititos, Vir!
–Bueno, para que alcance para todos.
–Pero si hay dos tortas mรกs โvienen atrรกs con las dos tortas.
–Bueno.
Se siguen riendo.
Me siento en un costado. Los niรฑos pasan corriendo de nuevo. Me propongo no volver a un cumpleaรฑos hasta que consiga trabajo.
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I’M GOING TO BUY SOMETHING FOR MY FOR FRIEND’S BIRTHDAY. Itโs an afternoon party, I tell myself, pastries, crustless sandwiches from a cafรฉ and pastry shop. Or seeds from that Chinese store. A packet of seeds. Two. Two packages of seeds. And a chocolate. Yes, it’s going to be fine,
Then, I say hello, I go to the kitchen. I leave the seeds on the counter and the chocolate. I donโt put it down. I grab it. I put it down. I grab it again. They call me. I keep it in my backpack.
I chat with a friend’s husband.
โโฆHow is the Secretary of?โ
โI quit.โ
My friend comes and rubs my arm quickly. I return the touch, โbut, but…โ what do you mean you quit?โ
โYes, my boss was an idiot.โ
Mi friend agrees that the boss was an idiot.
โBut… can’t I go in your place?โ
They laugh. Me, not so much. A little, but from nerves.
โHow long would it take Vir to hate your boss?โ says my friend.
“I wouldn’t hate him,” I tell her.
โYes, you would hate him.โ
โI swear I wouldn’t hate him.โ
โWell, you would start crying.โ
โI wouldn’t start crying, Cecilia, I wouldn’t start crying. Or I would start crying, but I would go to work anyway. I would work very hard.โ
They leave because the doorbell rang. Although I am a vegetarian, I eat six Vienna sausages.
A very beautiful girl enters. Asian. High cheekbones. Wrapped in a violet shawl. Instantly I want to be her friend.
I sit next to her.
I ask her what her name is, where she is from. Thanda. From Burma.
“And why did you come here?”
“For the tango.”
“Ha, ha ha. What an goddess.”
We laugh. She has perfect teeth.
“And what are you doing here?”
“I play the violin, in a tango group, and in the Colรณn Philharmonic.”
“Ah…” I leave the peanuts on the table. “and do they pay you at the Philharmonic?”
“Yes… we have a salary.”
“And how much they pay you, I say, is enough for you to live on. Do you live well with the philharmonic?”
She moves backward a little. She rubs the tip of her little finger. She looks to the side.
All the birthday party children run by.
I am left sitting next to a man. He tells me I have nice curls.
“Thank you. And what do you do?”
“I have chicken distribution service.”
“And what is the distribution of chickens like, can you live from that? That is, you distribute the chicken andโฆ”
They turn off the lights. The cake is coming. We sing happy birthday to my friend.
I offer to cut the cake. I cut small squares and put them on half a napkin each. My friends laugh. “They are very small, Vir!”
“Well, so that it is enough for everyone.”
“But if there are two more cakes.” They return with the two cakes.
“Well.”
They keep laughing.
I sit on the side. The children run by again. I make it a point not to return to a birthday party until I get a job.
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ENTRAMOS AL SANITORIO Y NOS RECIBE el cirujano que operar a papรก.
Quiero hablar con alguien mรกs de la familia, nos dice a mi hermana y a mรญ, para que entiendan el riesgo que significa esta operaciรณn.
Lo miramos y esperamos.
Abre un laptop y la apoya en medio de mรกrmol pulido, el bronce lustrado, el florero con lirios de tela. Somos gente de negocios en un hotel de lujo si no fuera porque en la pantalla aparece la mรฉdula de papรก.
Hace dos aรฑos que le vengo diciendo a Pablo, aprieta una tecla y la mรฉdula se agranda, es como un cable gris de que pronto he hace finito hasta casi cortarse, le vengo diciendo que en este punto, acรก, pone un dedo sobre la pantalla, la mรฉdula estรก comprimida.
ยฟDos aรฑos?
Hace dos aรฑos que le digo esto. A tu papรก y a tu mamรก.
No es nuestra mamรก, pero estรก bien, sรญ, es la esposa de รฉl.
Bueno, nos mira como con pena, a la esposa de รฉl. Amor me dice entonces. ยฟEn quรฉ pensรณ? Amores me dice, a mรญ y a mi hermana. Vengan siรฉntense. Si me apoyo la mano en la rodilla, salto hasta la araรฑa de caireles, pero no. Dice solamente el riesgo es que al separar las vรฉrtebras y descomprimir la mรฉdula, puede dejar de funcionar.
ยฟY eso quรฉ significa?
Eso significa una tetraparesia, cuadriparesia, cuadriplejiaโฆLas tres palabras asรญ muy rรกpido. Entiendo enseguida. Hago la pregunta mรกs estรบpida del mundo. Peroโฆ ยฟlรบcido? Sรญ, lรบcido. El infierno, pienso. Hago la segunda pregunta mรกs estรบpida del mundo: doctor, ยฟusted no sabรญa que รฉl tenรญa dos hijas?
Esta mirada ya sรญ es de pena. No, amor. No sabรญa nada.
Fruncimos la boca a la vez, mi hermana y yo, que siempre hacemos los mismos gestos y pensamos en general lo mismo sรณlo que ahora no puedo descifrar si ella quiere matar primero a papรก y despuรฉs a Isabella o primero a Isabella y despuรฉs a papรก y es que yo tampoco lo tengo claro.
Lo podrรญamos haber pensado entre todos, me dice cuando el cirujano ya se fue con la laptop bajo el brazo.
Abajo del cartel Check in/Check out de excelente รกnimo. รl estรก efervescente. Ella tenรญa Cirugรญa estรกn papa e Isabella. Mostramos la cabeza metida en un formulario. ยกHola! Hola preciosas, papรก habla, y habla, y habla. Me acuerdo del dรญa que lo operaron de vesรญcula en 2008, reciรฉn baรฑado con jabรณn pervinox y una batata de tela verdeagua, los braciotos blancos y gordos y su cabeza enorme y cuando ve lo que lo miro desde arriba, hundido en la camilla mientras ya vienen a buscarlo para el quirรณfano me diceโ ยฟSabรญas que Marx juzgรณ a Bolรญvar desde una mirada tremendamente eurocรฉntrico, considerรกndolo un general festive, es un ser consciente? El hombre, en tanto sujeto me es un
bรกquico, desbordado?โ.
Ahora habla del Sujeto. El hombre es un ser consciente. El hombre, en tanto Sujeto, sujeto moderno, y de pronto, ยฟsabรฉs?
No, ยฟquรฉ?
Me preguntรฉ al cirujano, โcuando usted me operรฉ: ยฟyo voy a ser un sujeto o un objeto?โ Y el tipo me dice, โyo no opero ni a un sujeto ni a un predicadoโ
Quรฉ boludo, digo yo.
No te creas, dice papรก. โYo no opero ni a un
sujeto ni a un predicado, opero a un ser humanoโ.
Ahhhh. Contentas las dos, mi hermana y yo.
โA un pacienteโ, dice Isabella y nosotras levantamos la cabeza como dos galgos.
โA un ser humanoโ, dice papรก.
โA un paciente, Pablo, lo escuchรฉ perfectoโ.
โA un ser humano, queridas, a un ser humanoโ, papรก junta mi mano con la de mi hermana y palmea suave, muy suave. Llaman para ingresarlo. Sรณlo hay que esperar cuatro horas.
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SIN QUERER MI HERMANA Y YO evitรกbamos hablarnos. Nos adorรกbamos. Adorรกbamos a papรก. Pero ya eran muchos dรญas..
Primero estรกbamos llenas de รญmpetu, de vamos para adelante y del amor todo lo puede. Salรญamos del sanatorio y querรญamos tomar un cafรฉ, un submarino, comentar de tal o cual enfermera y si la sonda Koler serรญa mejor que la Silmag. Ocuparnos.
Cuando se complicรณ en serio ni pensamos. Fuimos, venimos y nos llamamos, mensajeamos diez millones de veces hasta que nos ardieron los dedos y las orejas y era mail y telรฉfono y era mail y telรฉfono y Facebook entre nosotras y con el cirujano, el psiquiatra y los amigos, todo al mismo tiempo.
A partir de ahรญ, aunque mรกs tranquilas, ver el nombre de otra en el celular nos daba un golpecito en la panza. Era difรญcil recibir un wasap sin recordar que el que habรญa traรญdo las malas noticias.
Tampoco tenรญamos ya ganas de individualizar nombres de mรฉdicos o enfermeros ni encariรฑarnos particularmente con uno u otro.
Fueron cambiando, y eran todos mรกs o menos iguales.
Ya habรญamos regalado bombones, libros firmados. Ya habรญamos emocionado de verdad, habรญamos agradecido y habรญamos jurado que salรญamos delante de un modo que despuรฉs quedรณ corto, no conformรณ a nadie.
No fuimos de dar una noticia rotunda a los que rezaron, mandaron energรญa, se concentraron tal dรญa y a tal hora, y que merecรญan quizรกs un resultado menos tibio que el que tenรญamos para ofrecerles: rehabilitaciรณn.
ยฟHay que seguir rezando? Y, sรญโฆpero tampoco le quites el rezo a otro que estรฉ mรกs graveโฆ
Creo que al final, mi hermana y yo estรกbamos tan cansadas que cuando terminรกbamos el turno nos pasรกbamos un informecito mรกs o menos asรญ: rehabilitรณ โ durmiรณ โ no durmiรณ โ no rehabilitรณ โ sonriรณ โ no sonriรณ โ te quiero โ hasta maรฑana.
Creo que nos evitรกbamos para descansar realmente, Para no ver en la cara lo que habรญa de papa.
Tenรญamos un emoticรณn para despedirnos. No era una carita sonriente ni una carita triste. Era una cara sonriente boca abajo, El que lo dice diseรฑรณ es alguien muy sabio. No estรกbamos tristes. La felicidad no era imposible, Estaba ahรญ. Podรญamos verla. Solamente necesitรกbamos dar la vuelta.
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UNINTENTIONALLY, MY SISTER AND I avoided speaking to each other. We adored each other. We adored Dad.
At first we were full of energy, of let’s move forward and with love, anything is possible. We left the hospital and wanted to have a submarine, a coffee with hot milk with a chocolate bar dipped inside, comment on this or that nurse and whether the Koler probe would be better than the Silmag. To keep busy.
When things got complicated, we didn’t even think. We went out, we came back, and we called each other, we texted ten million times until our fingers and ears burned, and it was email and phone, and it was email and phone, and Facebook between us and with the surgeon, the psychiatrist, and our friends, all at the same time.
From then on, although calmer, seeing each otherโs name on the cell phone gave us a little punch in the stomach. It was difficult to receive a WhatsApp without remembering the one that had brought us the bad news.
We also no longer wanted to identify names of doctors or nurses or become particularly attached to one or the other.
They changed, and they were all more or less the same.
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย We had already given away chocolates and signed books. We had already heard profound words, we had already been deeply moved, we had been grateful, and we had sworn that we would prevail in a way that later fell short, it did not satisfy anyone.
We were unable to give resounding news to those who prayed, sent energy, concentrated on that day and at that time, and who perhaps deserved a less lukewarm result than the one we had to offer them: rehabilitation.
Is it necessary to continue praying? And, yes…but don’t take away prayer from someone else who is sicker…
I think that in the end, my sister and I were so tired that when we finished the shift, we gave each other a little report that went something like this:he recovered a bit – he slept – he didn’t sleep – he didn’t recover- he smiled – he didn’t smile – I love you – see you tomorrow.
I think we avoided each other to really rest, so as not to see in his face what was wrong with dad.
I think we avoided each other to really rest, so as not to see dadโs face in our faces. We had an emoticon to say goodbye. It wasn’t a smiling face or a sad face. It was a smiling face upside down. Whoever designed it is someone very wise. We were not sad. Happiness was not impossible, it was there. We could see it. We just needed to turn it around.
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Libros de Virginia Feinmann/Books by Virginia Feinmann
Raquel Jaduszliwer naciรณ en San Fernando, Provincia de Buenos Aires, Argentina, en 1946). Reside en la Ciudad Autรณnoma de Buenos Aires. Es Lic. en Psicologรญa por la UBA y se formรณ como psicoanalista. Publicรณ una novela, La venganza delclan de las banderas de acero (2018) y nueve poemarios: Los panes y los peces (2012, Primer Premio Poesรญa Ed. De Los Cuatro Vientos). La noche con su lรกmpara (2014, Primer Premio Poesรญa Ed. Fundaciรณn Victoria Ocampo). Persistencia delo imposible (2015, Premio Ediciรณn Ed. Ruinas Circulares). Las razones del tiempo (2018, Ed. Lisboa); En el bosque (2018, Ed. Modesto Rimba). รngel de la enunciaciรณn (2020, Ed. Barnacle). El รกrbol de las especies (2022, Ed. Barnacle), Los diagramas radiantes (2022, Ed. Barnacle), Todos los lugares se llamaban promesa (2023, Primer Premio Rubรฉn Reches, Ed. Ruinas Circulares). Fue expositora en el Festival Internacional de Poesรญa (C.A.B.A, Argentina, 2019), y en el programa de actividades del VI Festival Internacional de Poesรญa de Fredonia, Colombia (2022). Participรณ del ciclo โLenguas en dispersiรณnโ realizado en el Museo del Libro y de la Lengua en la Ciudad Autรณnoma de Buenos Aires (2023).
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Raquel Jaduszliwer was born in San Fernando, Buenos Aires Province, Argentina, in 1946). He resides in the Autonomous City of Buenos Aires. He has a degree in Psychology from the UBA and trained as a psychoanalyst. He published a novel, La venganza delclan de las banderas de acero (2018) and nine books of poetry: Los panes y los peces (2012, Primer Premio Poesรญa Ed. De Los Cuatro Vientos). La noche con su lรกmpara (2014, Primer Premio Poesรญa Ed. Fundaciรณn Victoria Ocampo). Persistencia delo imposible (2015, Premio Ediciรณn Ed. Ruinas Circulares). Las razones del tiempo (2018, Ed. Lisboa); En el bosque (2018, Ed. Modesto Rimba). รngel de la enunciaciรณn (2020, Ed. Barnacle). El รกrbol de las especies (2022, Ed. Barnacle), Los diagramas radiantes (2022, Ed. Barnacle), Todos los lugares se llamaban promesa (2023, Primer Premio Rubรฉn Reches. Ed. Ruinas Circulares). She was an exhibitor at the International Poetry Festival (C.A.B.A, Argentina, 2019), and in the program of activities of the VI International Poetry Festival of Fredonia, Colombia (2022). He participated in the cycle โLanguages โโin Dispersionโ held at the Museum of Books and Language in the Autonomous City of Buenos Aires (2023).
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Padre habla
dice
cuida de los rebaรฑos hija
hasta tu รบltimo dรญa
ese es nuestro legado somos tribus de exilio
dispersiones en tiempos de nevada
cuida de los rebaรฑos
las pasturas
atrรกs quedaron las casas incendiadas
todo lo abandonรฉ para que un dรญa nacieras
ah cรณmo arrancarme hija
esa bala de plata que sigue disparรกndose
asรญ hablaba mi padre
quedรณ escrito:
todos los sobrevivientes somos huรฉrfanos
todo el tiempo del mundo sigo viendo las casas incendiadas.
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Father speaks
he says
daughter, take care of the flocks
until your last day
that is out legacy we are tribes of exile
dispersions in times of snowfall
take care of the flocks
the pastures
the burnt out house stays behind
all that I abandoned so that you one day were born
ah how to pull out of me
that silver bullet that continues to be shot
so my father spoke
it is written:
all the survivors we are all orphans
all of the time of the world I keep seeing houses incinerated
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ยฟTe perdiste al menos una vez
en la parte mรกs profunda del bosque
y gritaste hay alguien ahรญ?
ยฟhay alguien ahรญ?
Otra pregunta:
ยฟte arrojarรญas sobre el fruto prohibido hasta ser devorado
o no hay fruto prohibido en este paraรญso con su telรณn de fondo
con su cielo al alcance, radiante y sin un pliegue?
ah, desperdicio, gesto desaprensivo
ยฟquรฉ fue lo que cambiaste por espejos
por algunas estrellas que parecen estrellas
por monedas
asรญ como si nada?
Allรก vamos ejรฉrcito sonรกmbulo
vamos hacia el destino de uno en uno
solitarios y ajenos allรก vamos
el corazรณn blindado
sin mirar atrรกs.
Tierra de desaliento ยฟquiรฉn responde?
ยฟhay alguien ahรญ?
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Have you at least once been lost
in the deepest part of the forest
and yelled is anyone here?
Is anyone there?
Another question:
Would you throw yourself on the forbidden fruit until being devoured
or is there no prohibited fruit in this paradise with
with its backdrop
with its sky within reach, radiant and without a pleat
ah, waste, unscrupulous gesture
what was that you exchanged for mirrors
for some stars that appear to be stars
for coins
as if it was nothing?
There we go, sleepwalking army
we go toward the destiny one by one
alone and foreign we go there
armored heart
without looking back.
Land of despair who answers?
is there anyone there?
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De elegir entre todas las cosas el talismรกn de oro
por ejemplo, esa presencia que todavรญa persiste
pero que corre riesgo
o ese guijarro por lo tan pequeรฑo
audaz en su firmeza
o la palma traslรบcida, esa mano
al momento en que logra desclavarse
de apegarnos a alguna de esas cosas
la palabra destino irรก cobrando vida
asรญ
encarnada en el corazรณn expuesto
a su mayor esperanza, y siempre a costa nuestra
a cuenta de las futuras pรฉrdidas
y de todas las bajas.
______________________________________
To choose the golden talisman from all things
for example, that presence that still persists
but runs a risk
or that pebble for being so small
audacious in its firmness
o translucent palm, that hand
at the moment that it is able to free itself
we become fond of some of those things
the word destiny will be taking on life
so
lying down with the heart exposed
against future loses
and all the casualties.
____________________________________________
Envuelta criatura nacida del interior de un bosque
blanca entre los terrones, tan pรกlida en la marcha
asรญ serรก tu alba
sombra creciente, pequeรฑa luz en los peligros del follaje.
Envuelta criatura, quรฉ serรก de tu huella
quรฉ serรก de tus pasos avanzando sobre la oscuridad:
envoltorio y follaje, sombra larga, criatura
a tu camino van a dar nuestros caminos incansables
nuestros buenos deseos, todas nuestras plegarias.
Allรก vamos antiguos peregrinos
una cuerda nos ata a la esperanza
salimos a buscarte criatura perdida
Perdido talismรกn piedra preciosa
reflejo del tesoro ausente
pozo en el medio del gran claro del bosque.
____________________________________________
Swaddled baby born from the inside of the forest,
white among the clods of earth, so pallid in the march.
your dawn will be that way
growing shadow, little light in the dangers of the foliage
swaddled baby, what will be of your track
what will be of your steps advancing above the darkness:
bundle and foliage large shadow, baby
to your journey they are going to give our untiring journeys
our good wishes, all our prayers
here we go ancient pilgrims
just a cord ties to hope
we leave to look for you lost baby
lost talisman precious stone
reflection of absent treasure
well in the middle of the great clearing in the forest.
_______________________________________________
Mi hijo se habรญa visto en medio de la noche
caminaba con las manos en alto, en fila entre los vencidos.
Mi hijo me decรญa:
madre ยฟme ves? sigo caminando en la noche mรกs tupida del bosque
voy tras los pasos de tus seres perdidos
directo al corazรณn de las casas quemรกndose.
Entonces yo gritaba
no sigas, no, no sigas
pero mi voz era un graznido.
ยฟQuรฉ mรกs podrรญa haber hecho?
yo era un cuervo letal sobrevolando
buscando el aura de las generaciones anteriores
el eslabรณn perdido
la luz que se diezmรณ.
_________________________________________
My son had seen himself in the middle of the night.
He walked with his hands up high, in line among the vanquished
My son said to me:
mother do you see me? I keep walking in the densest night of
the forest
I follow the steps of the lost beings
direct to the heart of the burning houses
Then I was shouting
donโt go on, donโt go on.
But my voice was a cawing.
What more could I have done?
I was a lethal crow flying above
seeking the aura of previous generations
the lost link
the light that burns itself up.
______________________________________
Ya ves, cuantiosa estรก la noche
terciopelo tendido para su pedrerรญa
ยฟencontraste el tesoro?
ยฟhas visto cรณmo brilla al fondo del abismo?
y entonces nos decimos
cuidado, porque tenemos miedo
cuidado el remolino
cuidado con el pozo por arriba de nuestras cabezas
no te asomes, no te tiente el destello de la fosa en lo alto
ten cuidado
que la noche es de luto
y vasto y enjoyado es el lugar de la pรฉrdida.
_____________________
You see already, this night is substantial
velvet stretched for its precious stones
did you find the treasure?
Have you seen how it shines at the bottom of the abyss?
And then we tell ourselves
be careful because we are afraid
when the whirlwind
when the well above our heads
be careful
that the night is of grief
and vast and adorned is in the place of the loss.
_______________________________________________
ยฟAcaso conocรญas la pulsaciรณn del รกrbol
su corazรณn con un latido รบnico?
recuerdo ese sonido como de planetas
moviรฉndose por extensiones que no recorrerรกs
y si apoyaras tu cabeza en el regazo
en la aspereza de la astilla
escucharรญas la voz de la madera
ella te harรญa sentir un huรฉrfano en tus huesos
y todo te pondrรญa tan de otra medida
tan abstracto te ves en lo viviente
casi sรณlo una idea, como un animal solo
sin especie
solo y adentro de tu pensamiento
solo bajo el inmenso poderรญo del bosque
su camino sombreado entre el cielo y la tierra
tu espรญritu vagando por el desorden verde.
_________________________________________
Perhaps you knew of the pulse of the tree
its sound with a unique beat?
I remember that sound like that of planets
moving thorough expanses that you wonโt ever travel
and if you rest your head in the lap
in the ruggedness of the splinter
you will hear the voice of the wood
and it will make you feel like an orphan in your bones
and everything would put you so much in another dimension
so abstract you see in the living
almost only an idea, like an animal alone
without species
alone under the immense power of the forest
alone and inside your thought
its path darkening between heaven and earth
your spirit wandering through the green chaos.
___________________________________________
Y el viento dice, el viento nos hace decir:
acepta las virtudes de la duraciรณn
por ellas, todo lo que deberรญa retirarse asรญ lo harรก
tambiรฉn tus pertenencias, la manera en que eras
todo lo que la corriente lleva; acรฉptalo
asรญ llorarรกs menos
asรญ tendrรกs mรกs fuerza
cierra tus cuentas
actรบa como si todo ya hubiera concluido
busca el fondo del pozo
en su espejo de agua y en el mayor silencio
verรกs que hay un suceso extraordinario
aรบn por consumarse.
________________________________________
And the wind says, the wind makes us say:
accept the virtues of timeโs duration
for them, all that should leave so it will be
also their belongings, the way you were
all the current carries away; accept it
and so you will cry less
so that you will have more strength
close your accounts
act as if everything had been finished
look for the bottom of the well
in a mirror of water and in the greatest silence
you will see that there is an extraordinary event
just about to being carried out.
_____________________________________________
Es que verรกs, รฉste es el oleaje tumultuoso del mundo
venรญamos de otra parte que nunca conocimos
en las aguas profundas
รฉramos como brazadas de animal incansable
y en el espejo de la superficie
nos quedรกbamos quietos como รกngeles
arpones suspendidos de una respiraciรณn.
Quiรฉn se acordarรก un dรญa
de cรณmo con las corrientes mรกs benรฉvolas
nadรกbamos a la bรบsqueda de estrellas sumergidas.
Arriba
mรกs arriba
hundidas para siempre al fondo de la noche.
________________________________________
As you will see, this is the tumultuous sea swell of the world
we come from another place that we never knew
in the deep waters
we were like strokes of a tireless animal
and in the mirror of the surface
we were staying quiet like angels
harpoons suspended by a breath.
Who will remember a day
that like the most benevolent currents
we were swimming in search submerged stars.
Above
further above
they are sunk for all times at the bottom of the night.
________________________________________________
Aclaraciรณn/Clarification:
Los tres primeros poemas fueron seleccionados del libro Las razones del tiempo (Editorial Lisboa, Buenos Aires, 2018)/The first three poems were selected from Las razones del tiempo (Editorial Lisboa, Buenos Aires, 2018)
Los tres siguientes corresponden a: En el bosque (Editorial Modesto Rimba, Buenos Aires, 2018)/The next three from: En el bosque (Editorial Modesto Rimba, Buenos Aires, 2018)
Los tres รบltimos a: รngel de la enunciaciรณn (Editorial Barnacle, Buenos Aires, 2020)/The last three are from: รngel de la enunciaciรณn (Editorial Barnacle, Buenos Aires, 2020)
Mรณnica Goldstein naciรณ en 1953, Trabaja en Buenos Aires. Desde 1976 participa en muestras individuales y colectivas en Argentina y en el extranjero.
“De adolescente me conmovรญan las pinturas prehistรณricas. Pensรฉ que lo que llamamos arte debe ser esencial al ser humano, y decidรญ dedicarme a รฉl. Me formรฉ en el taller de Eva Garcรญa. Por aquella รฉpoca Max Ernst y Paul Klee eran los artistas que mรกs admiraba. Investiguรฉ tรฉcnicas y materiales. Fuรญ encontrando aquellos con los que estaba en consonancia. Paralelamente estudiรฉ el pensamiento de India en la Universidad del Salvador. A mediados de los 80 comencรฉ a practicar meditaciรณn budista y yoga; mรกs adelante me formรฉ como instructora. Me acerquรฉ a los teรณricos, artistas y filรณsofos del arte contemporรกneo. Todo esto modificรณ tanto mi forma de producciรณn como la obra. El uso de tรฉcnicas automรกticas y la influencia del surrealismo fueron cediendo su lugar, surgiรณ otra actitud. En mi taller entro en รญntima relaciรณn conmigo misma, en un espacio silencioso, de tiempos pausados. Me interesan la posibilidad de evoluciรณn del ser humano, el Tiempo, la Libertad. Mi obra recorre distintas disciplinas: pintura, dibujo, monocopia, relieves, objetos, alguna instalaciรณn. Hacia finales de los 80 comencรฉ a producir libros de artista. La mayorรญa de ellos son ejemplares รบnicos, si bien he hecho tambiรฉn pequeรฑas ediciones. Trabajรฉ en diversos formatos: libro-objeto, rollos, libros intervenidos, entre otros”.
_________________________________
Mรณnica Goldstein was born 1953 and works in Buenos Aires. Since 1976, she has taken part in numerous solo and group exhibitions, both in Argentina and in the rest of the world.
“As a teenager I was touched by prehistoric paintings. I thought that which we call art had to be essential to humans, and so I decided to dedicate myself to it. I studied with the artist and art teacher Eva Garcรญa. By that time, Max Ernst and Paul Klee were the artists I admired the most. I researched techniques and materials. I found those I was in tune with. At the same time, I studied Indian thought at Universidad del Salvador. In the mid-eighties, I started practicing Buddhist meditation and yoga, and later I trained as an instructor.I became closer to the theorists, artists and philosophers of contemporary art. All this changed both my way of production and the work itself. The use of automatic techniques and the influence of surrealism gradually lost ground and a different attitude emerged. In my atelier, I establish an intimate relationship with myself, in a quiet space with slower times. I am interested in the potential for evolution of the human being, Time, Freedom. My production runs across different disciplines: painting, drawing, monoprint, reliefs, objects, some installations. Towards the end of the 1980s, I also began to produce artistsโ books. Most of my books are unique, but I have also published small editions. I have worked in a variety of formats โbook art objects, scrolls, intervention in books, among others.”
________________________
El arte de Mรณnica Goldstein/Mรณnica Goldstein’s Art
___________________________________
Obras de varias tรฉcnicas: /Works in various techniques:
Pintura, รณleo, fotografรญa, lรกpiz graso, monocopia sobre fiselina. Lรกpiz graso sobre acrรญlico, dibujo, tinta china/ Painting, oil, photography, grease pencil, monocopy on fiseline. Oily pencil on acrylic, drawing, Chinese ink
____________________________
Sonidos de Taa-Ga. 2003. Pintura, รณleo y fotografรญa sobre MDF.1.50 m x 0.90 m.
____________________________
El Salar del Silencio, dรญptico. 2011. Oleo y lรกpiz graso sobre MDF. 200 cm x 100 cm.
_________________________
En medio del camino. Dรญptico. 2016. Pintura. Acrรญlico sobre MDF. 164 cm x 42 cm
___________________________
En el Salar. 2015. Dibujo. Lรกpiz graso sobre plancha de acrรญlico. 45 cm x 160,5 cm x 7 cm.
_____________________________________
Tiempo de quietud. 2013. Monocopia sobre fiselina. Lรกpiz graso sobre acrรญlico. 44 cm x 200 cm.
_____________________________
Como un Eco, dรญptico. 2018. Dibujo, acrรญlico y Dibujo.sobre MDF. 200 cm x 100 cm
_________________________________
Cordillera. 2018. Monocopia. 95 cm x 31 cm.
________________________________
Imperturbables II, dรญptico. 2019. Pintura, acrรญlico sobre MDF. 85 cm x 82 cm
_____________________________
Imperturbables III. Monocopia. Oleo y lรกpiz litogrรกfico sobre papel. 118 x 48 cm.
___________________________
El Vigรญa. 2019. Dibujo. Tinta china, lรกpices y acrรญlico sobre MDF.
______________________________
Una vez un Lugar. 2022. Pintura, รณleo sobre MDF.184 x 70 cm
________________________________
Marin County. 2022. Monocopia, รณleo sobre papel 190 grs. 112 x 40 cm.
_________________________________
Libros de artista
“La dificultad de definir quรฉ es un libro de artista me interesa. Cada vez que encuentro una definiciรณn al mismo tiempo surge una obra que la desborda. Hay una frase de un gran maestro de Budismo Tibetano, Lama Anagarika Govinda, que dice “La libertad no es indocilidad ni desenfreno, sino la expresiรณn de la ley interior de uno’. Creo que cada libro de artista logrado tiene un orden, una ley interior que lo sostiene.”
Mรณnica Goldstein, 2014.
_________________________________
Artist’s Books
“The difficulty of defining what an artist’s book is interests me. Every time I find a definition, at the same time a work emerges that surpasses it. There is a phrase from a great teacher of Tibetan Buddhism, Lama Anagarika Govinda, who says ‘Freedom is not indocility or debauchery, but the expression of one’s inner law.’ I believe that every accomplished artist’s book has an order, an inner law that sustains it.
Mรณnica Goldstein, 2014.
________________________________
Shambala. 2008. Unico ejemplar. Libro modificado, tรฉcnica mixta, piedras, impresiones digitales, pintura. 27 cm x 33 cm x 9 cm/ Unique artist’s book. Modified book, mixed technique, stones, digital prints, painting. 27cm x 33cm x 9cm.
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REINOS MITICOS. 2009. รnico ejemplar. 7 pรกginas rรญgidas sobre una base de madera en la que se encastran en un eje central. Cada hoja estรก pintada de ambos lados y tiene un dibujo lineal que se continรบa al desplegar las 7 pรกginas en orden para conformar un paisaje total en una cara y con 7 imรกgenes diferentes en la otra. 58 cm x 14 cm x 10 cm/
2009. Unique artist’s book. 7 rigid pages on a wooden base which they fit into a central axis. Each sheet is painted on both sides and has a linear drawing that continues when unfolding the 7 pages in order to form a total landscape on one side and with 7 different images on the other. 58cm x 14cm x 10cm/
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Mi Principio mi Fin. รnico ejemplar. Tinta en papel japonรฉs Macau, Golden Panda, encuadernado en tela. 17,5 cm x 51,5 cm x 1 cm./ Unique artist’s book. Ink on Macau Japanese paper, Golden Panda, cloth bound. 17.5cm x 51.5cm x 1cm.
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SERIE SENDEROS, obras nรบmeros 3, 5 y 6
Tรฉcnicas: Dibujo e Ink jet print en papel ilustraciรณn mate 140 grs. Pastel tiza, lรกpices diversos, grafito, รณleo pastel/ Drawing and ink jet print on 140 gr matte illustration paper. pastel chalk, various pencils, grafiti, pastel oil.
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obra nยฐ3. 2021. Dibujo e Ink jet print en papel ilustraciรณn mate 140 grs. Pastel tiza, lรกpices diversos, grafito, รณleo pastel. 49,5 x 130 cm
obra nยฐ 5. 2022. Dibujo e Ink jet print en papel ilustraciรณn mate 140 grs. Pastel tiza, lรกpices grasos. 49,5 x 130 cm
Gustavo Grisoski naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1963. Se graduรณ como Arquitecto de la Universidad de Buenos Aires. Realizรณ exposiciones en el Centro Cultural Recoleta y otras gallerias en Buenos Aires y el exterior. Fue seccionado para el Premio del Salรณn Nacional de Artes Visuales 2000 (Palais de Glace, Bs. As.)
_______________________________
Gustavo Grisoski was born in Buenos Aires in 1963. He is an Architect, having graduated fromโthe University of Buenos Aires. He has had shows in the Recoleta Cultural Center and in other galleries and museums in Buenos Aires. Grisoski was awarded by the National Salon Prize for Visual Arts at the โPalais de Glaceโ in Buenos Aires.
________________________________________
Gustavo Grisoski les pinta, con afecciรณn y algo de surrealismo, a los judรญos devotos/โGustavo Grisoski paints, with affection an a bit of surrealism, the devote Jews.
______________________________________________
Sin tรญtulo/No title
Mรกs allรก de sรญ mismos/Beyond themselves
Mรกs allรก de sรญ mismos-2/Beyond themselves-2
Notas mรญsticas/Mystical Notes
Se abre el camino/Opening the Way
Dรณnde estoy?/Where Am I?
No temas/Don’t fear
Duelo/Grief
Expansiones/Espansions
Between Heaven and Earth/Entre el cielo y la tierra
Las novelas de Cecilia Absatz (Argentina, 1943), periodista, editora y escritora creativa, destacan por las voces sardรณnicas de sus heroรญnas y narradoras, su desenfadada franqueza sobre la sexualidad y el cuerpo, su mordaz sรกtira y su postura antiautoritaria y feminista. . Absatz viviรณ el represivo rรฉgimen militar argentino de 1976-83, y el valor de sus escritos radica en parte en las ideas que proporciona sobre ese perรญodo. En lugar de representar violaciones extremas de los derechos humanos, como desapariciones y torturas, su ficciรณn comunica las contradicciones y ansiedades de la existencia cotidiana en una Argentina bajo un gobierno autoritarioโฆ Su novela breve Feiguele, publicada en 1976 junto con cuentos como Feiguele y otras. mujeres ‘Feiguele y otras mujeres’, cuya primera ediciรณn fue suprimida por el gobierno militar, (1) y dos novelas completas, Te con canela (1982) y Los aรฑos pares (1985). Aรฑos numerados.’ (2)
Naomi Lindstrom
_________________________________________________
The novels of Cecilia Absatz (Argentina, 1943), journalist, editor, and creative writer, stand out for the sardonic voices of their heroines and narrators, their casual frankness about sexuality and the body, their mordant satire, and their antiauthoritarian and feminist stance. Absatz lived through the repressive Argentine military regime of 1976-83, and the value of her writing lies partly in the insights it provides into that period. Rather than representing extreme violations of human rights, such as disappearances and torture, her fiction communicates the contradictions and anxieties of everyday existence in an Argentina under authoritarian rule…Her brief novel Feiguele, published in 1976 along with short stories as Feiguele y otras mujeres ‘Feiguele and other women,’ the first edition of which was suppressed by the military government, (1) and two full-length novels, the 1982 Te con canela ‘Tea with cinnamon’ and the 1985 Los anos pares ‘The Even-Numbered Years.’ (2)
Naomi Lindstrom
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โLa siestaโ
Hace calor. Quรฉ calor que hace. Las baldosas del patio refrescan, pero por un rato nada mรกs. Hay que echarse y al ratito correrse un poco para encontrar baldosas nuevas, fresquitas. No hay nadie. Todos duermen o no estรก. Yo no puedo dormir, tengo mucho calor y otras cosas que no puedo explicar. Estoy en bombacha y nada mรกs. Aprovecho que no estรก mamรก que dice que ya estoy grande para andar asรญ, si viene alguien, que tu hermano, que tu padre. Estoy en bombachas y me miro al espejo. Vuelvo a acostarme sobre las baldosas sobre las baldosas y hago una especie de danza mirando al cielo blanco de la siesta. Fresquito en los talones, en las pantorrillas. En la parte de atrรกs de las rodillas no se puede. Los muslos, la cola (la cola todo el tiempo). La cintura y la cola, de un costado y del otro. Me siento rara. Al llegar a la espalda ya me aburrรญ. Hace demasiado calor para moverse.
Voy a ir a buscarlo a Luisito.
(Luisito comparte conmigo la cuadra desde que puedo recordar, Tambiรฉn los juegos, las excursiones a la cocina para cocinar panqueques de dulce de leche con campeonatos de revoleo por el aire, y el cine Rivoli con tres pelรญculas y la pizza despuรฉs). (A Luisito le dicen maricรณn porque estรก siempre conmigo y juega a disfrazarse y a bailar) (Pero no es maricรณn: un dรญa me dio un beso todo pegajosa. Como no nos gustรณ ni a รฉl ni a mรญ, no lo repetimos.)
Voy a ir a la casa de Luisito a ver quรฉ hacemos.
La casa de Luisito es una zapaterรญa con un vestรญbulo. En los aรฑos que fuimos amigos casi nunca entrรฉ a la habitaciรณn de adentro, donde dormรญan los padres. La casa de Luisito era el vestรญbulo, fresco y humilde con un sofรก que a la noche se convertรญa en dos camas para รฉl y su hermano Salo, y dos sillones de un cuerpo.
Tambiรฉn habรญa una escalera que no llevaba a ninguna parte. Era para โcuando construyamosโ.
Me pongo algรบn vestido encima y camino los veinte metros que me separan de Luisito. La calle, el barrio, el mundo, todo habรญa muerto de calor.
Abro sin llamar, como siempre -creo que no habรญa timbre-y me encuentro con lo รบltimo que hubiera esperado: Luisito, el papรก de Luisito. La mamรก de Luisito, y el hermano de Luisito, muy correctos todos, conversando con un seรฑor y una seรฑora nuevos. Me queo inmรณvil sin entender nada. รก
Los tรญos de Tucumรกn. Vinieron los tรญos de Tucumรกn. Mirรก que bien. Hago ademรกn de irme, pero la tรญa quiere conocer a la amiguita de Luisito y me invitan con un poco de Komari con soda. Es agrio, pero no lo digo porque todos estamos muy
Prolijito hablando de la escuela y todo eso. Salo se levanta del sillรณn y me lo ofrece y รฉl se queda de pie -al lado, un poco mรกs atrรกs con la mano apoyada en el borde superior del respaldo. En el vestรญbulo estรก fresco.
Estoy sintiendo una cosa, pero no estoy segura.
Debe ser una impresiรณn mรญa. El calor. O no, no sรฉ. Por las dudas me quedo muy quieta. Alguien me estรก hablando y yo no escuchรฉ. ยฟCรณmo? Ah, sรญ. Vivo en la esquina. No esto no es una impresiรณn mรญa. Estรก sucediendo: es una cosquilla, muy leve, muy leve, que me nace en la nuca, debajo del cabello. Un bichito chiquito que me hace una caricia, se me entra por la espalda, me recorre toda la espalda, me trae un calor, pero distinto, algo nuevo, terrible, no lo puedo resistirโฆ
Es Salo que me estรก acariciando la nuca. No baja de ahรญ, pero baja. La piel me estรก gritando cosas de todos los colores, tengo hormigas que me caminan entre las piernas, tengo algodรณn en el fondo de la boca, ya no veo nada.
Ellos siguen conversando.
Siento que la cara me estรก ardiendo y que
Todos se van a dar cuenta de lo que me pasa. No me atrevo a girar la cabeza para mirarlo a Luisito. Tengo miedo de que se descubra la mano de Salo aclareciรฉndome. Empiezo a ver todo nublado y ya no escucho lo hablan. Tengo pรกjaros revoloteando dentro de mi vientre. Las hormigas ahora estรกn en las axilas. Estoy absolutamente quieta, sorda y ciega. Por fuera.
Por dentro tengo un demonio, siete infiernos y mil tormentos. Tengo savia, torrentes y manantiales fluyendo entre las piernas.
La invasiรณn de las hormigas es total. Me estรกn devorando. Tengo las palmas de las manos mojadas, mojados los ojos, mojadas las piernas. Tengo un hombre acariciรกndome la nuca, y hace tanto calor.
Una rรกfaga de aire frรญo interrumpe el รญntimo incendio. Salo fue a servir mรกs Komari, el ventilador me mirรณ. Lentamente empiezo a recobrar el oรญdo. Y la vista. Todo sigue igual. Se habla de Tucumรกn. Luisito no se dio cuenta de nada.
Me levanto como puedo y aunque me propongo exactamente lo contrario, entro al dormitorio, y aunque me da vergรผenza enfrentarme a Salo, le acerco mi vaso, y aunque no los miro, รฉl me levanta la cabeza con una mano y me pregunta:
–ยฟNunca te besaron en la boca?
Tengo miedo de hablar porque sรฉ que la voz no me va a salir bien y entonces niego con la cabeza.
–Claro, sos chica, reflexionรณ.
Y al rato: –Maรฑana se van todos a Morรณn y me quedo solo. Venรญ que te voy a besar en la boca.
Hago como no oigo o no entiendo, o en รบltima estancia no me importa, y me vuelvo al vestรญbulo con el vaso de Komari que ahora me satisface porque, aunque es agrio estรก frรญo. Saludo a todos y me voy.
Vuelvo a casa y no me atrevo a tirarme sobre las baldosas. Ahora ya hay mรกs ruido en la casa y en resumen, tengo miedo de que se me vaya la sensaciรณn que tengo en todo el cuerpo. El resto del dรญa no hago nada que acostumbrarme porque cada vez que recuerdo lo que pasรณ me aparece un apretรณn en el vientre que se diluye por los muslos. Y lo recuerdo otra vez y otra vez aparece el apretรณn y me gusta y asรญ de algรบn modo voy a dormir la noche y duermo abrazada a la almohada que ahora se llama Salo y por suerte es bastante larga y puedo abrazarla con los brazos y con las piernas. Bien fuerte.
Toda la maรฑana me propongo no ir. No porque no quiera. Lo que no quiero es que รฉl sepa que estoy asรญ por รฉl. Ya casi estoy convencida de no ir en el almuerzo, hasta que todos desaparecen a la siesta.
Otra vez hace calor. Quรฉ calor que hace otra vez. Pero hoy tengo un apretรณn en el vientre y no me atrevo a tirarme sobre las baldosas,
Pienso, pienso un ratito y en seguida me doy cuenta de que Luisito tiene mi compรกs, y que si voy a buscar el compรกs a la mejor no nota tanto para quรฉ voy.
Aunque si se nota. Pero no puedo ir, abrir la puerta y decirle: acรก estoy, bรฉsame en la boca. Voy a buscar el compรกs que es lo mejor. Voy y abro la puerta. รl estรก escuchando la novela por la radio, (a รฉl no le dicen maricรณn, aunque escucha la novela por la radio, pero a รฉl no le gusta bailar ni representar y tampoco se le falsea la voz como Luisito). รl es grande, ya tiene 16 aรฑos.
Como si nada hubiera pasado me pongo a mirar la repisa: โLuisito tiene un compรกs mรญo, ยฟno lo viste? Lo necesitoโ. No miro nada, no busco nada, nada en el mundo, me importa menos que el compรกs. Trato de hablar fuerte para que รฉl no escuche los ruidos que tengo por dentro: los del corazรณn, como en las novelas, pero otros que nunca estรกn en las novelas, ruiditos de la panza, ruiditos de la garganta al tragar con tanta dificultad saliva y una repentina, terrible necesidad de ir al baรฑo. Lo peor.
Todo se detiene cuando รฉl por fin me agarra del brazo y me hace sentar al lado de รฉl y me dice โdespuรฉs lo buscรกsโ. Tengo vergรผenza de mirarlo y รฉl se estรก sonriendo. Lo matarรญa. O por lo menos me irรญa si pudiera. Si quisiera. Pero lo รบltimo que quiero en el mundo es irme.
–Asรญ que nunca te besaron en la boca.
Boca me sonaba a mala palabra. Hubiera preferido que dijera โen los labiosโ. Pero dice boca como a propรณsito y me mira la boca y entonces me siento incรณmoda y me salen muecas porque รฉl me mira en la boca.
Me toma el mentรณn y lentamente, lentamente me atrae la cara hacia la de รฉl. Yo pienso a toda velocidad: abro los ojos o los cierro cรณmo era en las pelรญculas cierro la boca o la abro en las pelรญculas, pero cuando uno da un beso junta los labios y aprieta en las pelรญculas abrirรกn los labios porque los actores no se conocen o no sรฉ por quรฉ, pero tengo que decidirme ya mismo, รฉl tiene los ojos cerrados yo los cierro quรฉ hago con la boca yo la cierro siempre que di un beso lo di con la boca cerrada bueno ya me toca la cierro y listo.
Junta los labios a los mรญos y todo lo que siento es unos labios juntos a los mรญos. Por las dudas abro los ojos y veo una parte del techo, torcido por la inclinaciรณn de mi cabeza, despuรฉs un pedazo de puerta con vidrio esmerilado y por รบltimo con los ojos cerrados y expresiรณn absurda. Quien es este seรฑor.
Se separa casi enojado y me dice: –ยฟPor quรฉ no abrรญs los labios? Estรบpida, estรบpida, estรบpida. Si en las pelรญculas abren los labios debe ser porque se besa con los labios abiertos. Me avergรผenzo y no puedo justificarme. No es mรกs que ignorancia y รฉl se da cuenta.
–Venรญ -ahora me abrazaโpero ahora abrรญ los labios.
Abro los labios tรญmidamente y mi boca hueca se encuentra con otra boca y no me resisto a abrir los ojos otra vez. Esto es algo horrible. Salo se aparta. Estรก enojado.
De pronto me agarra de un brazo, me aprieta fuerte y me besa ahora furiosa y me mete la lengua bien adentro de mi boca y empiezan a renacer los demonios y tiembla todo el cuerpo y me abandono y escucho sinfonรญas desafinadas y violentas y me vibra el vientre, ya no tengo ganas de ir al baรฑo ni pienso en las futuras siestas de besos, de Luisito sospechando y espiando, de empezar a conocer el sentido del pecado, de sentir cada pedazo de cuerpo gritar desesperando, de Luisito peleรกndose a trompadas con Salo, de tener la certera percepciรณn de cambio dentro de la piel y de saber que todo queda ahรญ y sรณlo se apaga en casa, de noche, con la complicidad de la almohada. Y despuรฉs Salo se aparta.
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย Entonces me tengo que ir. Me olvidรฉ del compรกs y casi no lo saludo porque me da vergรผenza, y camino muy derecha hasta casa.
It’s hot. It’s really hot. The patio tiles are cooling, but for a while nothing more. You have to lie down and after a while move around a little to find new, fresh tiles. No one. Everyone is sleeping or he is not there. I can’t sleep, I’m very hot and other things that I can’t explain. I’m in panties and nothing else. I take advantage of the fact that my mother is not here, and she says that I’m too old to walk like this, if someone comes, your brother, your father. I’m in panties and I look in the mirror. I lie down again on the tiles on the tiles and do a kind of dance looking at the white sky of the nap. Cool on the heels, on the calves. You can’t do it on the back of your knees. The thighs, the tail (the tail all the time). The waist and the tail, on one side and the other. I feel weird. When I got to the back I was already bored. It’s too hot to move.
โโI’m going to go look for him in Luisito.
โโ(Luisito has shared the block with me for as long as I can remember. Also the games, the trips to the kitchen to cook dulce de leche pancakes with fluttering championships in the air, and the Rivoli cinema with three movies and the pizza afterwards). (They call Luisito a faggot because he is always with me and plays dress-up and dances) (But he is not a faggot: one day he kissed me all sticky. Since neither he nor I liked it, we didn’t repeat it.)
โโI’m going to go to Luisito’s house to see what we do.
โโLuisito’s house is a shoe store with a hall. In the years we were friends I almost never went into the inside room, where the parents slept. Luisito’s house was the hall, cool and humble with a sofa that at night became two beds for him and his brother Salo, and two single armchairs.
โโThere was also a staircase that led nowhere. It was for โwhen we build.โ
โโI put on some dress over it and walk the twenty meters that separate me from Luisito. The street, the neighborhood, the world, everything had died from the heat.
โโI open without knocking, as always – I think there was no bell – and I find the last thing I would have expected: Luisito, Luisito’s father. Luisito’s mother and Luisito’s brother, all very correct, talking with a new man and woman. I remain motionless without understanding anything. to
โโThe aunt and uncle from Tucumรกn. The uncles from Tucumรกn came. Look how good. I also leave, but the aunt wants to meet Luisito’s friend and they invite me with some Komari and soda. It’s sour, but I don’t say it because we are all very
โโLong-winded talking about school and all that. Salo gets up from the chair and offers it to me and he remains standing next to it, a little further back with his hand resting on the upper edge of the backrest. It’s cool in the lobby.
โโI’m feeling something, but I’m not sure.
โโIt must be my impression. The heat. Oh no, I don’t know. Just in case I stay very still. Someone is talking to me and I didn’t listen. As? Oh Yes. I live on the corner. No, this is not my impression. It’s happening: it’s a tickle, very slight, very slight, that comes from the nape of my neck, under my hair. A tiny bug that caresses me, enters my back, runs all over my back, brings me warmth, but different, something new, terrible, I can’t resist it…
โโIt’s Salo who is caressing the back of my neck. It doesn’t go down from there, but it goes down. My skin is screaming things of all colors at me, I have ants crawling between my legs, I have cotton in the back of my mouth, I can’t see anything anymore.
โโThey continue talking.
โโI feel like my face is burning and
โโEveryone is going to realize what’s happening to me. I don’t dare turn my head to look at Luisito. I’m afraid that Salo’s hand will be revealed by clarifying me. I begin to see everything cloudy and I no longer hear what they are saying. I have birds fluttering inside my belly. The ants are now in the armpits. I am absolutely still, deaf and blind. Outside.
โโInside I have a demon, seven hells and a thousand torments. I have sap, torrents and springs flowing between my legs.
The invasion of ants is total. They are devouring me. My palms are wet, my eyes are wet, my legs are wet. I have a man caressing the back of my neck, and it’s so hot.
โโA gust of cold air interrupts the intimate fire. Salo went to serve more Komari, the fan looked at me. Slowly I begin to regain my hearing. And the view. Everything remains the same. They talk about Tucumรกn. Luisito didn’t notice anything.
โโI get up as best I can and although I intend exactly the opposite, I enter the bedroom, and although I am embarrassed to face Salo, I bring my glass to him, and although I don’t look at them, he lifts my head with one hand and asks me:
โโ–Have they never kissed you on the mouth?
โโI’m afraid to speak because I know my voice won’t come out well and so I shake my head.
โโ–Of course, you’re a girl, he reflected.
โโAnd after a while: –Tomorrow everyone is going to Morรณn and I’ll be alone. Come, I’m going to kiss you on the mouth.
โโI act like I don’t hear or I don’t understand, or in the last moment I don’t care, and I return to the lobby with the glass of Komari that now satisfies me because, although it is sour, it is cold. I greet everyone and leave.
โโI come home and I don’t dare throw myself on the tiles. Now there is more noise in the house and in short, I am afraid that the feeling I have throughout my body will go away. The rest of the day I do nothing but get used to it because every time I remember what happened I get a tight feeling in my belly that dissipates through my thighs. And I remember it again and again the squeeze appears, and I like it and so somehow, I go to sleep at night and I sleep hugging the pillow that is now called Salo and luckily it is quite long and I can hug it with my arms and with my hands. legs. So strong.
โโAll morning I resolve not to go. Not because I don’t want to. What I don’t want is for him to know that I’m like this for him. I’m almost convinced not to go at lunch, until everyone disappears for nap.
โโIt’s hot again. How hot it is again. But today I have a tight feeling in my stomach and I don’t dare throw myself on the tiles,
โโI think, I think for a little while and immediately I realize that Luisito has my compass, and that if I go to look for the compass he might not notice so much what I’m going for.
โโAlthough it is noticeable. But I can’t go, open the door and say: here I am, kiss me on the mouth. I’m going to look for the beat that is best. I go and open the door. He is listening to the novel on the radio (they don’t call him a faggot, although he listens to the novel on the radio, but he doesn’t like to dance or perform and he doesn’t falsify his voice like Luisito). He is big, he is already 16 years old.
โโAs if nothing had happened, I start looking at the shelf: โLuisito has a compass of mine, didn’t you see it? I need it”. I don’t look at anything, I don’t look for anything, nothing in the world, I care less than the beat. I try to speak loudly so that he doesn’t hear the noises I have inside: those of my heart, like in novels, but others that are never in novels, little noises from my belly, little noises from my throat when swallowing saliva with such difficulty and a sudden, terrible need to go to the bathroom. Worst.
โโEverything stops when he finally grabs my arm and makes me sit next to him and tells me โyou’ll look for him later.โ I’m embarrassed to look at him and he’s smiling. I would kill him. Or at least I would leave if I could. If I wanted. But the last thing in the world I want is to leave.
โโ–So they never kissed you on the mouth.
โโMouth sounded like a bad word to me. I would have preferred it to say โon the lips.โ But he says mouth on purpose and looks at my mouth and then I feel uncomfortable, and I make faces because he looks at my mouth.
โโHe grabs my chin and slowly, slowly pulls my face towards his. I think at full speed: I open my eyes or close them as it was in the movies, I close my mouth or open it in the movies, but when you give a kiss you put your lips together and press together, in the movies they will open their lips because the actors don’t know each other. Or I don’t know why, but I have to decide right now, he has his eyes closed, I close them, what do I do with my mouth? I close it whenever I gave a kiss, I did it with my mouth closed, well, it’s my turn to close it and that’s it.
โโHe puts his lips to mine and all I feel is lips to mine. Just in case I open my eyes and see a part of the ceiling, twisted by the inclination of my head, then a piece of door with frosted glass and finally with my eyes closed and an absurd expression. Who is this gentleman?
โโHe breaks away almost angrily and says to me: –Why don’t you open your lips? Stupid, stupid, stupid. If they open their lips in movies, it must be because they kiss with open lips. I am ashamed and I cannot justify myself. It’s nothing more than ignorance and he realizes it.
โโ–Come – now he hugs me – but now I opened my lips.
โโI shyly open my lips and my hollow mouth meets another mouth and I can’t resist opening my eyes again. This is something horrible. Salo moves away. He’s angry.
โโSuddenly he grabs me by the arm, squeezes me hard and kisses me now furiously and he puts his tongue deep inside my mouth and the demons begin to be reborn and my whole-body trembles and I let myself go and I listen to out of tune and violent symphonies and my heart vibrates. belly, I no longer feel like going to the bathroom nor do I think about the future naps of kisses, of Luisito suspecting and spying, of beginning to know the meaning of sin, of feeling every bit of my body scream in despair, of Luisito fighting with Salo, of having the certain perception of change within the skin and of knowing that everything stays there and only goes off at home, at night, with the complicity of the pillow. And then Salo moves away.
Then I have to go. I forgot the compass and I almost don’t greet him because I’m embarrassed, and I walk very straight home.
Max Dickmann naciรณ de padres judรญos inmigrantes en 1902 en Buenos Aires, Fue escritor argentino, periodista, novelista. Premio literario municipal por Madre Amรฉrica, 1935; Gente,1936; Los Frutos amargos, novela, 1942; Esta generaciรณn perdida, novela, 1945; Tambiรฉn traducciones de John dos Passos, William Faulkner, PC Wren, Elmer Rice y Robert Sherwood. Miembro: Sociedad Argentina de Escritores, PEN Club.
_______________________________________
Max Dickmann; was born of Jewish immigrant parents in Buenos Aires in. 1902. He was an Argentine writer, journalist, novelist. He won the Buenos Aires Municipal Literary Prize for Madre Amรฉrica, 1935; Gente, 1936; Los frutos amargos, novel, 1942; La generaciรณn perdida, novel, 1945; Also, he translated books by John dos Passos, William Faulkner, Elmer Rice and Robert Sherwood. He was a Member of Argentine Society of Writers and PEN Club.
A diferencia de la gran mayorรญa de los escritores judรญos de la Argentina de las dรฉcadas de 1930 a 1940, Max Dickmann no escribiรณ para un pรบblico judรญo. Sus novelas fueron รฉxitos de ventas en todo el paรญs y fueron populares entre todo tipo de persona. Lo que no se sabe es dรณnde aprendiรณ tanto sobre la gente del rรญo.
Unlike most Jewish writers in Argentina in the ’30s to ’40s, Max Dickmann did not write for a Jewish audience. His novels were best sellers throughout the country, popular with all sorts of people. What is not known is where he learned so much about the people of the river.
De:/From: Max Dickmann. Madre Amรฉrica. Buenos Aires: Santiago Rueda Editores, 1935.
“La carta”
Gabriel hizo un esfuerzo y consiguiรณ sacar una pierna del barro que la aprisionaba, mientras la otra se le hundรญa con burbujeรณ, hasta la rodilla. El agua borrosa recalentaba por el sol de mediodรญa. Un alto juncal cerraba el horizonte a los pocos metros. El Mabensรญ flotaba cerca con proa llena de roncos finos, largos, verdosos, con un trajo oblicuo de la hoz en el extremo.
โโEsa hoz de juncos con crostas de barro, habรญa costado a Gabriel toda una maรฑana de penoso chapoteo, haciendo desesperados esfuerzos para no hundirse, tirando de sus piernas como si quisiera sacarlas de un cepo, mientras las burbujas de barro se adhirieron a su piel, como sanguijuelas. Temรญa la espalda ardiendo, despuรฉs de tres horas de sol, de un sol que brillaba en el agua como en un espejo, en medio de un silencio hosco a todo ruido, como si las manos de silencio ahogaron las gargantas del sonido.
โChapoteรณ en el agua que se arremolinaba en torno a sus piernas y alcanzรณ la borda del Mabensรญ. Cayeron adentro con ruido sordo, la hoz y el ancho cinturรณn de cuero. Bajo el casco, el agua era fresca. Lentamente, como para no sorprender el lanchรณn semidormido. Gabriel fue izรกndose hasta quedar sentado en la borda. Ahora sus pies flotaban como dos informes trozos de barro desleรญdo, que hubieron ido subiendo desde el lecho del rรญo, tiรฑendo el agua de concรฉntricos cรญrculos terrosos. Hubo un rรกpido sonido acuoso y en torno al Mebensรญ flotaron luminosas burbujas.
โAdentro, las tablas estaban recalentadas y el hilo de agua que se colaba en el fondo se secaba con rapidez. Gabriel fue remando lentamente agua en contra, bordeando el juncal y los matorrales de la costa baja, sobre la que caรญa el follaje verdinegro de un arbolado. A lo lejos, entre cielo y hoja, habรญa de tortora espadaรฑa y paja colorada.
ย โโLa proa levantaba del Mabensรญ resbala en el agua sin ruido. Atrรกs, el remo gorgoteaba y la onda se dilataba hasta meterse en los pajonales. Hubo un corto aleteo y el silencio se rasgรณ en trizas cuando cantรณ el mirlo negro. El eco tableteรณ a lo lejos. Despuรฉs todo volviรณ a ser un solo y blando zumbido en el que se oรญa el roncar de las moscas bravas en el agua de las charcas.
โโโEl riacho fue ensanchรกndose entre barrancas, en las que los juncos habรญan sido cortados a ras del agua.
โโโEl verde jugoso de la cortadera con sus hojas aserradas brillaba como gotas de esmeralda.
โโ Gabriel enfilรณ el Mabensรญ en direcciรณn de una barrera de รกlamos entre los que florecรญan algunas viejas sauces. La barranca se abrรญa en un angosto tajo en la desembocadura de un arroyo.
โโ En el agua quieta los tallos tiernos del irupรฉ rodeaban las inmensas bandejas vere amarillentas y su flor carmesรญ. La sombra del follaje caรญa entre lampos de sol sobre la cabeza y los brazos desnudos de Gabriel.
โSintiรณ sobre la piel un leve frescor, un honda bienestar que penetraba todo el cuerpo, como si de la sombra fuera descolgรกndose un invisible chorro de agua fresca,
Mascรณ con avidez, tirando en el fondo del lanchรณn, las anchas rebanadas de pan y carne que le habรญa preparadp Camelia muy de maรฑana, rezongando porque รฉl le decรญa siempre que era poco y que ella querรญa matarlo de hambre. Cerrรณ los ojos y esperรณ que la rama que tapaba a un rayo de sol volviera a echarle sombra en la cara,
Camelia rajaba el largo trozo de pan con un cuchillo sin filo. Las manotas afanadas y la ancha boca llena de palabrotas y de sarcรกsticos risitas. โPara llevarte todo esto mรกs que volvรกs a comerโฆยฟo es que creรฉs que voy a estarme preparรกndote estas viandas?…ยกNo, seรฑorโโฆ, y se plantaba frente a รฉl con las manos en las caderas y los ojos bizcos tratando de mirar en la misma direcciรณn. Alrededor de ella, los perros olisqueaban batiendo la cola. Por la angosta puerta de la cocina entraba el fresco de la maรฑana con el piar de los pollos y el cloque de las gallinas. Gabriel agarraba a Camila por los brazos y le daba afectuosos estrujones, que ella recibรญa con รญntima satisfacciรณn, que se empeรฑaba en disimular con todo gรฉnero de protestas. Entonces el pan volvรญa a dividirse en rebanadas y gruesas lonjas de carne frรญa de la noche anterior cubrรญan la miga de manchas sanguinolentas. โTres, cuatro, cinco; ยฟte alcanzarรก con esto? โ preguntaba Camelia con voz amableโy si no te alcanza a aguantarte el hambre, venรญ a comer aquรญ en lugar de andar vagando por los arroyos como si buscara a alguienโ โฆ
La cara de Gabriel volviรณ a quedar en sombra. Arriba dos hojas tiernas brillaban como cristales verdosos sobre los que cayera el sol. El resto del follaje se inmovilizaba en una quietud paralitica bajo el cielo pรกlido. Los sauces pendรญan sobre el agua vigilados por los รกlamos erguidos. El Mabensรญ se contorneรณ pesadamente y el agua chapoteรณ entre su borda y la barranca. La marea socavaba la tierra desarraigando los juncos que no encontraban suficiente apoyo en el barro arenoso, e iban poco a poco acostรกndose como gajos sin fuerza.
Gabriel se sentรณ y afirmรณ el bichero en unas estacas que habรญa entre los yuyos. Le pareciรณ oรญr el chapoteo de un remo y el arrastre de una chalana en el agua quita de algรบn arroyo. Venรญa el sonido como dando tumbos en la maleza y caรญa como un eco ahogado y lejano. Por instantes el silencio lo cubrรญa todo; un silencio de espera, que palpitaba como un inmenso cuerpo vivo agazapado entre los รกrboles o suspendido de los doseles de ramas que bajaban hasta el agua. De ese lado la sombra se algareaba hasta la mitad del riacho; del otro la barraca se resacaba el sol. Contra esa pared de tierra, ramas y follaje, rebotaba ahora un largo silbado el golpeteo rรญtmico de un remo. Entre los juncos asomรณ la proa de una chalana cargada de troncos y estacones. Gabriel la reconociรณ en seguida. Silbรณ con los dedos en la boca y gritรณ parรกndose en la popa del Mabensรญ.
–ยกNazareno!
–ยฟQuiรฉn va? โ preguntรณ una voz muy carca.
La embarcaciรณn desembocรณ en el riacho a espaldas de Gabriel. En pocas remadas se colocรณ en el medio del cauce y fue arrimรกndose hasta el Mabensรญ.
Gabriel vio que Nazareno tenรญa el sombrero echado sobre los ojos.
ย ย ย ย ย ย –Buena sombra te buscas, para esconderte โ dijo el otro cuando se acercรณ.
โโ–Y vos quรฉ haces al sol, ยฟsecarte mรกs todavรญa? โ sonriรณ Gabriel
–ยฟCรณmo quรฉ hago? Me lo preguntas todavรญa, no ves que llevo estos carajosโฆ
–ยฟAdรณnde?
–Adonde iba a ser sino a lo de Basualdo.
Nazareno se sentรณ en el fondo de la chalana. Al quitarse el sombrero la frente apareciรณ hรบmeda y negra de pelos, como pegados por el sudor. Se olisqueรณ las manos y encongiendo la nariz: โestos cercos de thuya dejan un olor a resina que voltea โ dijo, al tiempo que des un repasador a cuadros y se ponรญa a comer unos tomates grandes como puรฑos.
Gabriel lo vio tragar durante un rato. Despuรฉs sacรณ una botella y limpiando el gollete con el puรฑo de la camisa, bebiรณ haciendo gorgoritos. La nuez subรญa bajaba por el por el cuello flaco a cada trago. Volviรณ a pasarle el brazo por la boca y alargando la botella a Gabriel, dijo:
–Tres tragos solamente; mira que todo lo que tengo para hoy.
Gabriel puso un dedo donde le seรฑalรณ Nazareno. Tragรณ un vino agrio y tibio que le volviรณ hasta la garganta en largos eructos.
–Has cortado bastanteโdijo Nazareno, apuntando a los juncos–, pero muy amarillos.
–Es lo mejor que habรญa; pero con cuatro dรญas de sol estarรกn como ls buenos. Para cortar negro y verde hay que meterse en el barro hasta la barriga.
–Che—-ยฟy te da algo el tรญo por los manojos?
–Si saca veinte centavos por cada unoโฆ. Quรฉ querรฉs que me dรฉโฆ –encogiรฉndose de hombros.
-Que te dure la vocaciรณn, entonces โsonriรณ el otroโY ya que de juncos se trata, dime Gabrielitoโฆ –bajando la voz– ยฟno te ha dado la bizca nadaโa mรญ, eh?โโโ โy guiรฑรณ un ojo.
Gabriel hizo como que buscaba algo en los bolsillos del pantalรณn, despuรฉs en el fondo del Mabensรญ y hasta debajo del asiento. Nazareno lo miraba moverse, suspenso el aliento y los ojos fijos en los manos,
–Nada, cheโฆ; hoy no se acordaba de vosโrespondiรณ Gabriel con sorna.
–ยกPuรฑetas! ยฟY para eso revisas todo y me tienes esperando? โprotestรณ el otro, acostรกndose en el fondo de la canoa.
Gabriel largรณ una carcajada y le tirรณ un manotรณn. Nazareno se tapรณ los ojos con el chamburgo y fingiรณ dormir. Despuรฉs de un rato dijo:
–Crece con ganas hoy este puรฑetero rรญรณโฆ, y yo debo ir aguas arriba.
–Trajiste hoy โEs mi ilusiรณnโ, porque esperabas carta de Camelia.
โโ –Que me lleve el diablo si he penado de ella.que con รฉsta me parece que voy volandoโฆ y cargo menos, dos cosas dignas de tenerse en cuenta.
–Sรญ โฆ es mejor que el Mabensรญ โreflexionรณ Gabriel.
****************
Nazareno agarrรณ el remo y sentรกndose en la popa empujรณ la chalana rรญo abajo. Gabriel lo siguiรณ.
*******************
Camelia miraba comer a Gabriel, apoyando en un de los troncos de la enramada. Tenรญa la cabeza inclinaba sobre un hombro y decรญa en voz muy baja.
–Se te ha perdido en el fondo de un bolsillo o en el Mabensรญ, y vos decรญs no lo has visto.
Gabriel sacudiรณ la cabeza a la izquierda a la derecha. Tenรญa la boca llena de unos fideos duros y fritos, que apenas podรญa tragar.
–No, no te creo. Ya me diste lo mismo muchas vecesโprotestรณโella.
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย Hubo una nueva negativa y el ruido de una cuchara que caรญa en el plato.
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย –ยฟHay otra cosa mejor, para comer? โpreguntรณ โcon la boca llenaโฆEstos fideos de ayer son incomibles.
–ยฟY quรฉ ha de haber? Lo de siempre y un poco menosโrespondiรณ Camelia sin moverse.
–Si querรฉs yo te escribo una carta una carta en lugar de Nazareno, y le dejรณ un lugar abajo la firma para el beso.
Camelia pateรณ con fastidio.
–Si yo sรฉ que lo tenรฉs guardada.
ย ย ย ย ย ย –Ya no se acuerda mรกs de vos, anda detrรกs de otra, asรญ que para quรฉ te va a escribir.
–ยกSos un cochino si decรญs eso de Nazareno!
Los ojos gris plomo de la muchacha se pusieron horriblemente bizcos.
–ยฟQuerรฉs que lo sigamos un dรญa para saber adรณnde va?
–A รฉl no le sigue nadieโฆ Y ademรกs no sรฉ con quรฉ lo vas a seguir. Con el Mabensรญ, acaso โrรญรณ ella, despectiva.
–Con la chalana โEs mi ilusiรณnโ. โGabriel guiรฑรณ un ojo maliciosamente.
Gabriel struggled and managed to remove one leg from the mud that imprisoned it, while the other sank with bubbling, up to his knee. The muddy water was warmed by the midday sun. A tall reed bed closed off the horizon a few meters away. The Mabensรญ floated nearby with a prow full of thin, long, greenish logs, with an sharp growth of reeds around the end of the boat.
ย ย ย ย That growth of reeds with mud crusts had cost Gabriel a whole morning of painful splashing, making desperate efforts not to sink, pulling at his legs, as if he wanted to free them from a trap, while the mud bubbled up. They adhered to his skin, like leeches. He feared is back would be sun burnt, after three hours of sun, a sun that shone on the water as in a mirror, in the midst of a sullen quiet, as if the hands of silence drowned out the throats of sound.
He splashed through the water that swirled around his legs and reached the side of the boat called the Mabensรญ. The sickle and the wide leather belt fell inside with a thud. Under the hull, the water was cool. Slowly, so as not to surprise the half-asleep boat. Gabriel hoisted himself up until he was sitting on the rail. Now his feet floated like two shapeless pieces of melted mud that had risen from the river bed, coloring the water with concentric earthy circles. There was a quick watery sound and luminous bubbles floated around the Mebensi.
Inside, the boards were overheated and the trickle of water that seeped into the bottom dried quickly. Gabriel slowly rowed against the water, skirting the reeds and bushes of the low coast, on which the black-green foliage of a tree fell. In the distance, between sky and leaf, there were cattails and red straw.
โThe raised bow of the Mabensรญ slips in the water without sound. Behind, the oar gurgled and the wave expanded until it entered the grasslands. There was a short flutter of wings and the silence was torn to shreds as the blackbird sang. The echo clattered in the distance. Then everything returned to a single, soft hum in which you could hear the snoring of wild flies in the water of the ponds.
ย ย ย โThe stream widened to a ravine, in which the reeds had been cut flush to the water.
โThe juicy green of the Cortadera with its serrated leaves shone like emerald drops.
โGabriel headed the Mabensรญ in the direction of a barrier of poplars among which some old willows were flowering. The ravine opened into a narrow gap at the mouth of a stream.
In the still water the tender stems of the irupรฉ surrounded the immense yellowish vere trays and their crimson flower. The shadow of the foliage fell between patches of sun on Gabriel’s head and bare arms.
He felt a slight freshness on his skin, a deep well-being that penetrated his entire body, as if an invisible stream of fresh water were coming down from the shadow.
He munched greedily, throwing into the bottom of the boat the wide slices of bread and meat that Camelia had prepared for him very early in the morning, grumbling because he always told her that it was not enough and that she wanted to starve him to death. He closed his eyes and waited for the branch that was blocking a ray of sunlight to cast shadows on his face again.
ย ย ย ย Camelia was slicing the long piece of bread with a dull knife.โHer busy hands and the wide mouth full of dirty words and sarcastic giggles. โTaking all of this away, it would be better if you eat hereโฆ.or do you think I’m going on preparing these meals for you?โฆNo, sirโโฆ, and she stood in front of him with her hands on her hips and her cross-eyed eyes trying to look in the same direction. Around her, the dogs sniffed, wagging their tails. The cool morning air came in through the narrow kitchen door with the chirping of the chickens and the cluck of the hens. Gabriel grabbed Camila by the arms and gave her affectionate squeezes, which she received with intimate satisfaction, which she insisted on hiding with all kinds of protests. Then the bread was divided into slices again, and thick slices of last night’s cold meat covered the crumbs with bloody stains. “Three four five; Will this be enough for you? – Camelia asked in a kind voice – and if you can’t hold back your hunger, come eat here instead of wandering through the streams as if you were looking for someone…”
Gabriel’s face fell into the shadows again. Above, two tender leaves shone like greenish crystals on which the sun had fallen. The rest of the foliage froze in paralytic stillness under the pale sky. The willows hung over the water, watched by the upright poplars. The Mabensรญ rolled heavily, and the water splashed between its gunwale and the gulley. The tide undermined the earth, uprooting the reeds that did not find sufficient support in the sandy mud, and little by little they lay down like weak branches.
โโGabriel sat down and secured the boat hook to some stakes between the weeds. He thought he heard the splash of an oar and the dragging of a barge in the shallow water of some stream. The sound came as if stumbling through the undergrowth and fell like a muffled and distant echo. For moments silence covered everything; a silence of waiting, which palpitated like an immense living body crouched among the trees or suspended from the canopies of branches that descended to the water. On that side the shadow stretched to the middle of the stream; on the other, the hut basked in the sun. Against that wall of earth, branches and foliage, a long whistling sound now bounced, the rhythmic tapping of an oar. The bow of a barge loaded with logs and stakes appeared among the reeds. Gabriel recognized it immediately. He whistled with his fingers in his mouth and shouted, standing on the stern of the Mabensรญ.
–Nazareno!
–Who’s there? โ asked a very deep voice.
The boat passed into the stream, behind Gabriel. In a few strokes, he placed himself in the middle of the channel and moved closer to the Mabensรญ.
Gabriel saw that Nazareno had his hat pulled over his eyes.
ย ย ย “You’re looking for a good shadow to hide yourself in,” he said as the a other fellow came near.
–And what are you doing in the sun, drying yourself even more? โ smilingly Gabriel
–What am I doing? You’re asking me; don’t you see that I’m carrying this shit…
–Where to?
–Where, if not to Basualdo’s.
โ Nazareno sat at the bottom of the barge. When he took off his hat, his forehead appeared wet and with black hair, stuck together by sweat. He sniffed his hands and crunched up his nose: โThese thuya hedges leave a smell of resin that is overwhelming,โ he said, while he took out a checkered cloth and began to eat some tomatoes as big as fists.
Gabriel watched him swallow for a while. After taking out a bottle and wiping the neck with the cuff of his shirt, Nazareno drank, gurgling. His Adam’s apple went up and down his thin neck with each swallow. He put his arm over his mouth again and, handing the bottle to Gabriel, said:
–Three swigs only; Look at everything I have today.
โโGabriel put a finger where Nazareno pointed. He swallowed the warm, sour wine that returned to his throat in long belches.
โโ”You have cut enough,” said Nazareno, pointing to the reeds, “but very yellow.”
–It’s the best there was; but with four days of sun they will be just as good. To cut black and green you have to get up to your belly in the mud.
–Che–and does the old man give you something for the bunches? –
โโ-If he gives me twenty cents for each one… –What do you want him to give me … –shrugging his shoulders.
โโ –“May your efforts work out, then,” the other smiled. “And since it’s about reeds, tell me Gabrielito…” – lowering his voice – “hasn’t the cross-eyed given you something at all, eh?” – and he winked. eye.
โโGabriel pretended to be looking for something in his pants pockets, then in the hull of the Mabensรญ and even under the seat. Nazareno watched him move, his breath suspended and his eyes fixed on his hands,
โโ –Nothing, che…; “She didn’t remember you today,” Gabriel replied sarcastically.
โโ–Damn! And that’s why you check everything and keep me waiting? โthe other protested, lying down in the bottom of the boat.
โGabriel laughed sarcastically and shook his hand. Nazareno covered his eyes with his hat and pretended to sleep. After a while he said
โโ–This bloody river is growing with spirit today…, and I have to go upstream.
โโ–You brought โIt’s My Dreamโ today because you were expecting a letter from Camelia.
โโ –The devil take me if I have thought of her. With this one it seems like I’m flying… and it weighs less, two things worth taking into account.
โโโYesโฆ it is better thanโthe Mabensรญ โGabriel reflected.
โโโโโโโโโโโ****************
โโNazareno grabbed the oar and, sitting on the stern, pushed the barge down the river. Gabriel followed him.
โโโโโโโโโโ******************
Camelia watched Gabriel eat, leaning on one of the trunks of the bower. He had his head tilted on one shoulder and said in a very low voice.
โ –It was lost at the bottom of a pocket or in the Mabensรญ, and you say you haven’t seen it.
Gabriel shook his head left and right. My mouth was full of hard, fried noodles that I could barely swallow.
โ –No, I don’t believe you. “You already gave me the same bull many times,” she protested.
โThere was another rejection and the sound of a spoon falling onto the plate.
โโ–Is there anything better to eat? โhe asked โwith his mouth fullโฆThese noodles from yesterday are inedible.
โโ–What should there be? The usual and a little lessโCamelia responded without moving.
โโ –If you want, I’ll write you a letter, a letter in Nazarene’s place, and leave a place below for the signature for the kiss.
Camelia stamped her feet in annoyance.
โโ–Yes, I know that you have it.
โโ–He doesn’t remember you anymore, he’s after someone else, so why would he write to you.
–You’re a pig if you say that about the Nazarene!
โโThe girl’s lead gray eyes went horribly cross-eyed.
โโ–Do you want us to follow him one day to find out where he is going?
–With the barge โIt’s My Dream.โ โGabriel winked maliciously.
โโ–No one catches him… And besides, I don’t know what you’re going to catch him with. With the Mabensรญ, perhaps โ-he laughed, contemptuously.
Elvira Levy Periodista y poeta. Residiรณ durante casi veinte aรฑos fuera de su paรญs: Barcelona y Madrid (1973 a 1986), y Jerusalรฉn (2001 a 2007). Poeta, narradora, ensayista y crรญtica, coordinadora de talleres y seminarios literarios y de artes plรกsticas. Cofundadora de la Asoc. Prometeo de Poesรญa de Madrid; miembro de SEA (Sociedad de Escritoras y Escritores de Argentina) y de AIELC (Asoc. Israelรญ de Escritores en Lengua Castellana); miembro de jurados, panelista y participante de congresos de literatura, en los que ha presentado y publicado ponencias. Ensayos publicados: Aspectos parciales de la obra de Octavio Paz (1983, con Josรฉ Luis Crespo), y Los judรญos y el descubrimiento de Amรฉrica (1992, Premio “Jerusalem 1990/91”, con Alicia Casais. Poemarios: Eva y el espejo (1981), Crรณnica de una ausencia (1988), Hablando con Borges (1998), Bifurcaciรณn de la memoria (Tel-Aviv, 2005).
______________________________
_______________________________________
Elvira Levy ArgentineJournalist and poet. She lived outside his country for almost twenty years: Barcelona and Madrid (1973 to 1986), and Jerusalem (2001 to 2007). Poet, narrator, essayist and critic, coordinator of literary and plastic arts workshops and seminars. Co-founder of the Prometeo Poetry Association of Madrid; member of SEA (Society of Writers of Argentina) and AIELC (Israeli Association of Writers in the Spanish Language); member of juries, panelist and participant in literature conferences, in which he has presented and published papers. Published essays: Partial aspects of the work of Octavio Paz (1983, with Josรฉ Luis Crespo), and The Jews and the discovery of America (1992, “Jerusalem 1990/91” Prize, with Alicia Casais. Poems: Eva and the mirror ( 1981), Chronicle of an Absence (1988), Talking with Borges (1998), Bifurcation of Memory (Tel-Aviv, 2005).
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Poemas de amor y otros/Poems of love and others
Es temprano aรบn
Es temprano aรบn,
Me dicen,
y vuelvo la mirada hacia atrรกs
Y veo pedazos de vida
Aquรญ y allรก, dispersos, exhaustos.
Tienes el blanco y el negro en tus manos,
me dicen,
y miro hacia delante
y una impรกvida oscuridad
cubre la luz tenebrosa.
Las palabras nacen y caen en el papel
sembrando frases ilusorias.
Apenas suenan en los oรญdos
perdieron su ritmo interno.
La mรบsica muriรณ en el tumulto.
El aroma de la flor se extraviรณ
en el laberinto de las especias.
Mas es temprano aรบn,
me dicen,
y crece la incertidumbre
ante las horas que llegan.
_____________________________
It is Still Early
It is still early,
they tell me,
and see pieces of life,
here and there, scattered, exhausted.
You have black and white in your hands,
they tell me,
and I look forward,
and an unflinching darkness
covers the tremulous light.
Words are born and fall on the paper
sowing illusory phrases.
They barely sound in your ears:
They have lost their internal rhythm.
The music died in the tumult.
The flowers aroma got lost
in the labyrinth of spices.
But it is still early,
they tell me,
and uncertainty grows
before the approaching hours.
_________________________________
Paulatinamente
Paulatinamente,,
el amor nace,
crece en mรญ.
Al fin estalla,
Rebasa los lรญmites de mis manos
Mas, inรบtil fruta madura,
Queda en mรญ.
La soledad vela fuegos insomnes.
Y asรญ pertenezco,
con la constante tristeza del presente,
aguardando un gesto, un llamado.
Oh si fuera capaz
matarรญa el amor,
las palabras que siguen vibrando,
volverรญa a la luz.
Pero no,
desde la inquietud de las sombras,
Desde la impotencia de nacida del todo,
aรบn espero.
____________________________________
Gradually
Gradually,
Love is born,
it grow in me.
Finally it explodes,
exeeeds the limits of my hands
but, unless ripe fruit,
remains with me.
Loneliness watches over the sleepless fires.
And so I remain,
with the constant sadness of the protest,
awaiting a gesture, a summons.
Oh if I were able
I would slay love,
in the words which continue vibrating,
I would return to the light.
But no,
from the restlessness of shadows,
from the impotence born of reality,
still I hope.
______________________________________
La blanca ausencia
Y aquรญ tambiรฉn esa desconocida
y ansiosa y breve cosa que es la vida.
Jorge Luis Borges
Rรกpida,
ferozmente,
un monstruo de metal
destruyรณ tu vida.
Y allรก, en el Sur,
en una calle de Buenos Aires,
comenzรณ a florecer
la blanca ausencia.
La lluvia cayรณ sobre la ciudad.
La tristeza empapรณ la tierra,
rodรณ por las avenidas,
llegรณ a los ojos.
Se perdieron nuestros pasos en el camino
y vos,
te quedaste sola en un campo de verde silencio.
Multitud de hojas empezaron
a borrar la huella de tu cuerpo,
mientras sรณlo crecรญan lรกgrimas entre la hierba.
Y vinieron las horas,
las sombras sobre las sombras,
los rumores se extendieron,
la luz abriรณ de nuevas sus alas:
La vida recobrรณ la muerte
tendida en el asfalto.
Todo eso sucediรณ,
hermana,
pero aรบn continรบa lloviendo en Buenos Aires.
_________________________________________
The White Absence
Y aquรญ tambiรฉn esa desconocida
y ansiosa y breve cosa que es la vida.
Jorge Luis Borges
Rapidly,
ferociously,
a monster of metal
destroyed your life.
And there, in the South,
on a Buenos Aires Street.
the white absence began to flourish.
The rain fell on the city.
Sadness soaked the dirt,
rolled down the avenues,
arrived at the eyes.
Our steps were lost along the way,
and you,
stayed alone in a field of green silence.
A multitude of leaves began
to erase the traces of your body,
while only tears grew between the grass.
And the hours came,
the shadows on the shadows,
the sounds spread out,
the light opened its wings again:
Life recovered death
Stretched out on the asphalt.
All that happened,
sister,
but it still goes on raining in Buenos Aires.
____________________________________
Tienes miedo de mรญ
y huyes.
Conmovido, penetras en la lรณgica de las telaraรฑas.
Ya no existo en ti.
Sin embargo,
ยฟquiรฉn mecerรก tus noches vacรญas de olvido?
ยฟQuiรฉn oirรก la mรบsica
que nace del incendio de tu carne?
ยฟQuiรฉn te darรก mรกs vida
que mi misma vida?
Un silencio iracundo te rodea,
corroe los hambrientos pasadizos de la ausencia,
los anillos perdidos renacen en tus dedos.
Tu cuerpo arde. Se quemarรก
sin que nadie presencie el esplendor de las llamas.
Entonces,
ยฟquiรฉn saciarรก tu sed,
despuรฉs de apagar la hoguera?
___________________________________________
You Fear Me
And you flee.
Moved, you penetrate the logic of the spider webs.
I no longer exist in you.
Nevertheless,
who will rock your nights empty of forgetting?
Who will hear the music
that is born in the fire of your flesh?
Who will give you more life
than my life itself?
An angry silence surrounds you,
corrodes the hunger passageways of the absence,
the lost rings are reborn on your fingers.
Your body burns. It will be burnt,
without anyone witnessing the splendor of the flames.
Then,
who will satiate your thirst,
after extinguishing the bonfire.
__________________________________
Poema Preliminar
Ayer viajรฉ a Egipto y me dirigรญ a la corte del faraรณn.
Allรญ pedรญ hablar con Josรฉ y, postrรกndome ante รฉl,
urgรญ que interpretara mis sueรฑos,
mas como le habรญan cortado las orejas,
no pudo oรญrme.
Sรณlo alcanzรณ a ver el insomnio en mis ojos.
Fue entonces que me preguntรณ:
“ยฟPor quรฉ la vigilia de tus noches?,ยฟcuรกles son tus secretos?,
ยฟpor quรฉ deliras por las naves que se alejan?,
ยฟpor quรฉ aรบn sientes el cosquilleo de una hormiga en tus manos?
Tal vez hay algo diminuto en el aire que te perturba:
ยฟUna mota de polvo?,ยฟuna gota de lluvia?,ยฟun murmullo?
Dime ยฟte atreverรกs a buscar las respuestas?
Recuerda que Aleppo estรก cerca.
Y tus ancestros podrรญan ayudarte en la bรบsqueda,
y cuando el insomnio te abandone,
sueรฑa, sueรฑaโฆ
Recuerda que alguien dijo:
De toda la memoria sรณlo vale
el don preclaro de evocar los sueรฑos.”
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Preliminary Poem
Yesterday, I travelled to Egypt, and I went directly to Pharoahโs Court.
There I asked to speak with Joseph and prostrating myself before him,
I pressed him to interpret my dreams.
However, as they had cut off his ears,
he couldnโt hear me.
he only was able to see the insomnia in my eyes.
It was then, that he asked me:
โWhy do you make vigil at night? What are your secrets?
Why do you rave for the ships that go away?
Why do you still feel the tickling of a bug in your hands?
There is something very small thing in the air that perturbs you:
A speck of dust? A drop of rain? A murmur?
Tell me: do you dare to seek the answers?
Remember that Aleppo is nearby.
And your ancestors would be able to help in your search,
And when insomnia abandons you,
Sleep, sleepโฆ
Remember that someone said:
Of all memory is only valuable
The illustrious gift to evoke dreams.โ
_______________________________
El cardรณn
(Trichocereus Terschecckii)
Yo, cactus, ocre vegetal que anida en los cerros, me declaro inocente.
Perdรณn por mi apariencia. No tengo voz ni voto para decir al mundo que mis espinas ocultan albor y ternura. Crecรญ en soledad como la piedra y el hombre. Entre zozobras y la emociรณn de ser amado intentรฉ sembrar hallazgos, y solamente obtuve ausencias.
Perdรณn por mi apariencia. Abran mi pecho. ยกMiren la flor que brota de mi tronco, mis brazos que se elevan a Dios!
(La lluvia me ha olvidado. Un dรญa se asomรณ y me enamorรฉ de ella.)
Yo, cactus, seco ermitaรฑo de sierras y quebradas, sรฉ que la ciudad de luz y colores desdeรฑosamente me observa, poseedora de lluvia.
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The Large Cardon Cactus
(Trichocereus Terschecckii)
I, cactus,
vegetable ocher, rare in the mountains.
declare myself innocent.
Excuse me for my appearance.
I donโt have even a voice nor a vote to say to the world,
that my spines hide dawn and tenderness.
I grew in solitude,
like rock and man.
Between anxieties
and the emotion of being loved,
I intended to plant discoveries,
and I only obtained absences.
Excuse my appearance.
Open my chest.
Look at the flower that sprouts from my trunk,
My arms that raise themselves to God!
(Rain had forgotten me.
One day it appeared, and I fell in love with it.)
I, cactus,
dry hermit of mountains and gorges,
I know that the city of light and colors
observes me with distain,
possessor of rain.
_________________________________
La pasiรณn de creer en un destino รบnico
La pasiรณn de creer en un destino รบnico
รกngulo verdesur de la tierra-
cambiรณ por crueldad
La inocencia de un pueblo.
La risa se convirtiรณ en muecas.
El รณxido corrompiรณ
el brillo de los eslabones.
Negra cadena que enlutรณ su historia
porque crecieron apetitos
y vientos siniestros soplaron
desde el poder y las calles.
Tรกnatos venciรณ a Eros.
La avidez de los hombres coronรณ la muerte.
ยฟCuรกndo se iniciรณ el espanto?
ยฟLos dรญas breves, el soliloquio?
ยฟCuรกndo volverรก a sonreรญr el poeta,
transformando el aire?
______________________________
The passion of believing in a unique destiny
The passion of believing in a unique destiny-
Green-south angle of the earth-
changed by cruelty
the innocence of a people.
Laughter changed into grimaces.
The rust corrupted
The brilliance of the steps.
Black chain that grieved its history
Because appetites grew and winds blew
From powder and the streets.
Thanatos defeated Eros.
The avidness of men crowned death.
When was shock initiated?
The brief days, the soliloquy?
When will the poet smile again,
transforming art.
Translations by Stephen A. Sadow
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Poemarios de Elvira Levy/Poetry Books by Elvira Levy
Silvia Plager naciรณ en Buenos Aires. Entre sus obras de ficciรณn se cuentan Amigas, Prohibido despertar, Boca de tormenta, A las escondidas, Alguien estรก mirando, Mujeres pudorosas, La baronesa de Fiuggi, la novela histรณrica Malvinas, la ilusiรณn y la pรฉrdida –escrita en coautorรญa con Elsa Fraga Vidal-, El cuarto violeta, Boleros que matan (thriller seleccionado para competir por el Premio del Lector de la Feria del Libro 2012), La rabina, Las mujeres ocultas de El Greco y Complacer. Tambiรฉn publicรณ Nosotras y la edad (ensayo) y un libro de cocina y relatos, Mi cocina judรญa. Incursionรณ en el humor con Al mal sexo buena cara y Como papas para varenikes. Obtuvo, entre otros, los premios Corregidor-Diario El Dรญa de La Plata, Tercer Premio Municipal, Faja de Honor de la SADE, y resultรณ finalista del Concurso Planeta 2005. Fue distinguida como “Mujer destacada en al รกmbito nacional” por la Honorable Cรกmara de Diputados de la Naciรณn (1994) y con la Medalla al Mรฉrito por la Comisiรณn Permanente de Homenaje a la Mujer Bonaerense (2002). Colabora con diarios y revistas y coordina talleres literarios. Varios de sus textos han sido incluidos en antologรญas publicadas en la Argentina y en el extranjero.
Silvia Plager was born in Buenos Aires. Amigas, Prohibido despertar, Boca de tormenta, A las escondidas, Alguien estรก mirando, Mujeres pudorosas, La baronesa de Fiuggi, the historical novel Malvinas, la ilusiรณn y la pรฉrdida –written with Elsa Fraga Vidal-, El cuarto violeta, Boleros que matan La rabina, Las mujeres ocultas de El Greco y Complacer. Tambiรฉn publicรณ Nosotras y la edad (ensayo) y un libro de cocina y relatos, Mi cocina judรญa. She wrote humor in Al mal sexo buena cara y Como papas para varenikes. She obtained, among others, the Corregidor-Diario El Dรญa de La Plata awards, Third Municipal Prize, SADE Honor Sash, and was a finalist in the 2005 Planeta Contest. She was distinguished as “Outstanding Woman at the National Level” by the Honorable Chamber of Deputies of the Nation (1994) and with the Medal of Merit by the Permanent Commission of Tribute to Buenos Aires Women (2002). She collaborates with newspapers and magazines and coordinates literary workshops. Several of his texts have been included in anthologies published in Argentina and abroad.
Penguin Books
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“Latkes de papa”
INGREDIENTES:
1 Kg de papas
1 cebolla
2 huevos
Sal y pimienta a gusto,
4 cucharadas de harina,
Aceite, cantidad necesaria
PREPARACIรN
Pele y lave las papas, sรฉquelas y rรกllelas, Ralle tambiรฉn la cebolla y ponga todo en un bol, con los huevos, la sal y la pimienta. Agregue la harina y mezcle hasta obtener una masa ni muy espesa ni muy chirle. Caliente el aceite en un sartรฉn y vierta la preparaciรณn por cucharadas. Frรญa los latkes hasta que estรฉn dorados de ambos lados.
Evocaciรณn y realizaciรณn
La historia de los famosos latkes de Cathy Rosenfeld comenzรณ cuando Catalina Goldsmith le dijo a su mamele que David, el muchacho que habรญa conocido en Hebraica, vendrรญa a cenar.
Ustedes se estarรกn diciendo que los latkesโcomo cualquier persona u objetoโtienen su propia historia. Pero la pasiรณn amorosa entre la muchacha de diecisiete aรฑos y la comida judรญa naciรณ en este acontecimiento.
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย <<Se rallan asรญ>>, decรญa doรฑa Berta, moviendo arriba y abajo su mano derecha. En los aรฑos sesenta no habรญa procesadora y se cocinaba como se pensaba: directo y sin vueltas. David habรญa aceptado la invitaciรณn: candidato seguro. Doรฑa Berta repitiรณ del rallado con una cebolla y volviรณ a enseรฑarle a la hija la energรญa con que le debรญa a cabo el fundamental primer paso. Cata la imitรณ, primero con la papa y despuรฉs con el resto. La madre al comprobar la destreza heredada llevรณ la mano izquierda al corazรณn y lanzรณ su oi vei que sonรณ a lamento pero que Cata supo interpretar; los oi veis de doรฑa Berta tenรญan matices que sรณlo los familiares y amigos lograban descifrar; รฉste era de satisfacciรณn, alegrรญa, placer, orgulloโฆ
Tres dรฉcadas mรกs tarde, Catalina lanzรณ un suspiro que la asemejรณ a la mamaโa pesar de los veinticinco aรฑos y los veinticinco kilos de diferenciaโal contemplar a los emperifollados mozos que, como polรญticos, salรญan del ala de la cocina rumbo al salรณn y los doscientos comensales. El estandarte de batalla que portaban en alto contenรญa crocantes latkes, los habรญa de papa, de berenjena, de harina de matzรก, de harina de garbanzosโฆ
La sofisticaciรณn en las recetas llegaba a puntos inimaginables. Tan inimaginables como el goce que el rostro de Cathy Rosenfeld intentรณ disimular. Y sรญ, su descarga era รฉsa. Los manjares salรญan y en ella entraban aromas, sabores, texturas. Desde hacรญa cinco aรฑos era lo รบnico bueno que le entraba; lo otro bueno se habรญa muerto con David, su esposo.
Ella jurรณ ser fiel. No habรญa otro hombre en su vida. Toda su energรญaโque era mucha y vorazโla volcarรญa en la cocina. Y asรญ creciรณ su fama y su fortuna. Pero ยฟera feliz? No. Un no rotundo y duro como beiale viejo.
Las buenas lenguas comentaban que el finado. ยกpobre!, no habรญa sabido decirle que no en la mesa ni en la cama y, que ella, con los ingredientes afrodisรญacos que utilizaba en sus comidas, acabรณ por acabarlo. En sentido figurado, es claro, porque David siempre acababa ferverosamente lo que su mujer le ofrecรญa, y sin chistar. Nueces y dรกtiles adornaban las mesitas de luz del dormitorio matrimonial. Y la pimienta y la nuez moscada se sumaban a mรบltiples especias para sazonar caldos, blintzes, prakes, knishes, varenikes, budines, pescados, kneidlejโฆ
Catalina, Cata, Cathy, obtuvo consuelo diciendo que รฉl, finalmente, habรญa partido con el gesto plรกcito del bebรฉ que se adormece mamando. Recordรณ el menรบ de la noche fatal, y el camisรณn de encaje con el que lo sorprendiรณ. Despuรฉs de comer pastrรณn casero, el cepillado de dientes debe ser profundo y minucioso; las fibras de carne restante de fibras pueden causar mal aliento, ademรกs de otros males. Eso pensรณ Cata que tal vez habrรญa pensado su Davidโque no abandonรณ ni el cepillo ni la pileta ni el espejo del botequรญnโante la deslumbrante presencia de encaje negro.
รl se miraba la dentadura y ella le miraba el torso desnudo.
Ella bajรณ breteles del camisรณn y sus ubres calientes se apoyaron en la ancha espalda. รl cepillaba y cepillaba y ella frotaba, frotaba. รl apretado, apretado contra la pileta; ella, contra รฉl. David solรญa comparar los pechos de su mujer con los sabrosos pechitos ahumados que ella le cocinaba todos los miรฉrcoles.
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย Los otros dรญas tambiรฉn se cumplimentaban con manjares, pero eran una sorpresa. Los miรฉrcoles, la sorpresa venรญa despuรฉs; siempre un camisรณn nuevo y una nueva forma de hacerlo, el amor, no el camisรณn, que solรญa estar hecho en Parรญs como casi toda la ropa interior de Catalina Rosenfeld. Porque Cathy, aun cuando era Catalina Goldsmith, tenรญa sus exigencias. Sรกbanas, manteles, soutienes y calzones debรญan ser suaves y perfectos. Perfecciรณn que despuรฉs del ya mencionado episodio de la primera cena y los latkes del debut (en todo sentido) llegarรญa a las cumbres. Cumbre que no sรณlo escalรณ David, sino que tuvo a parientes y amigos como devotos alpinistas. Nadie podรญa resistir a la seducciรณn de sus comidas. Era como negarse a una puesta del sol en la playa o a la magia del beso bajo la luna. Todos soรฑaban con compartir su mesa, y hasta habรญa atrevidos que soรฑaban compartir su cama. Olvidรฉ decir que Catalina habรญa sido una buena idish meidele y aรบn continuaba siรฉndolo. Madura. Pero jugosas y fragrante como una fuente de guindas. Y justamente รฉse fue el postre que habรญa convenido con los padres de Jesica Weitzman. En el clรญmax de su euforia gustativa del bat-mitzva, la carne de las guindas flambeadas encenderรญa los paladares y la entrepierna. Ella ya lo habรญa experimentado. Y se encendiรณ anticipadamente, sin apartar el ojo de ollas, sartenes y cacharros. Sobre la mesada, las fuentes con arenques le representaron su propia existencia toda la sal, toda la exquisitez, todo el aroma, pero nada de color. Comenzรณ a disponer, alrededor de los solitarios arenques, rodajas de cebolla, de tomate y las puposas e imprescindibles aceitunas negras. Adorno como si estuviera adornรกndose, ella misma, para la visita del hombre. Miradas, tal vez, pero visitasโฆEl vestido de raso negro convertรญa a Cathy en otra aceituna que provocaba la mordida. El chef pasรณ a su lado como rozรกndola sin querer. Pero querรญa. Catalina tambiรฉnโa pesar de su promesa de castidad que se lo prohibรญaโy dijo oi vei por lo bajo. El chef, un cincuentรณn fornido, entendiรณ que no era un suspiro de cansancio se tragรณ el oi mame porque su mame, desde el mรกs allรก, le habrรญa reprochado que un padre con hijas casaderas ocupara su mente en otra cosa que casarlas, El que deseaba casarse era รฉl, pero ya estaba casado. Y el objeto de su deseo y tormento habรญa dedicado su viudez a la gastronomรญa. Una lรกgrima que se confundiรณ con el sudor humedeciรณ las bien rasuradas mejillas de Saรบl Steinberg. รl era un hombre limpio y un eficiente cocinero. Con eficiencia limpiรณ su cara y sus pensamientos antes de dedicarse a batir la crema (no fuera a ser que se le cortara).
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย Catalina, todavรญa conmocionada por el roce, concentrรณ sus favores y fervores en la decoraciรณn de guefilte fish. Sobre cada bola de pescado, colocรณ un rodaje de zanahoria hervida, no pudo evitar asociaciones. El simple ademรกn le recordรณ otros ademanes y otras redondeces, aรฑos atrรกs, junto al bargueรฑo estilo francรฉs de su hogar materno. En esa casa habรญa aprendido los secretos de la cocina y del amor. Porque la madre, siempre atareada, el padre, siempre distraรญdo, y los hermanos, siempre estudiando o en el club, les dejaban comedor libre.
Ella disponรญa vajilla y manjares sobre el blanco mantel; y David disponรญa a su antojo. Asรญ le habรญan mezclado a Catalina los placeres del sexo con los de la comida. Y caricia va, bocado viene, los labios superiores e inferiores sincronizaron acciones y succiones. Asรญ, elaborando y saboreando, se le habรญa parte de su vida. Evocรณ las enseรฑanzas escolares y se dijo que ellaโcon el respeto merecidoโera igual que sus admirados poetas mรญsticos. Se sintiรณ Sor Juana, Santa Teresa, sรณlo que ella habรญa sustituido la pluma por el cucharรณn. En todo eso pensaba mientras sumergรญa la cuchara en la salsa con la que baรฑarรญa los blintzes de pollo y oรญa el ruido de la batidoraโque habรญa puesto en marcha Saรบlโcomo si se tratara de un corazรณn suplementario.
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย Con quรฉ velocidad lata. El culpable era el vaho del vino que acababa de echar en la salsa. Quizรกs ese vaho habรญa llegado hasta Eduviges, que pelaba almendras sentada en un rincรณn. Eduviges se santiguรณ. Debรญa ser cosa del diablo; ella, resignada a la solterรญa, al trabajo y a las tareas de caridad, desde el dรญa en que habรญa puesto el pie en Recepciones Cathy Rosenfeld, no tenรญa sosiego, ยฟQuรฉ eran estos calores? El mรฉdico diagnosticรณ: menopausia. Su conciencia, calentura. Estaba como gato en el celo; especialmente cuando la seรฑora entraba en la cocina, con manos de hada, picaba, sazonaba, rebozaba, horneabaโฆ Los aromas y las recetasโque constantemente hacรญa probar a sus ayudantesโmareaba mรกs que el licor de mandarinas casero, รบnico vicio de Eduviges. Cuando la seรฑora le decรญa, quรฉ manera de transpirar, Eduviges, ella se ruborizaba. Claro que la seรฑora la habรญa visto empaparse de sudor, sacudirse como so le dieran fiebres y despuรฉs exclamar, oi vei. Eduviges pensรณ que decir oi vei era una especie de exorcismo porque enseguida de decirlo, a la seรฑora le cambiaba la cara. Entonces Eduviges aprendiรณ a decir oi vei. Cathy estaba contenta con la ayudante que, ademรกs de haber interpretado el espรญritu de la comida judรญa, habรญa adoptado modismos y dichos.
Peel and wash the potatoes, dry, and grate them. Also grate the onion and put everything in a bowl, with the eggs, salt, and pepper. Add the flour and mix until you obtain a dough that is neither too thick nor too thin. Heat the oil in a frying pan and pour the preparation by tablespoons. Fry the latkes until golden brown on both sides.
Evocation and Fulfillment
The story of Cathy Rosenfeld’s famous latkes began when Catherine Goldsmith told her mamele that David, the boy she had met at Hebraica, was coming to dinner.
You may be telling yourselves that latkesโlike any person or objectโhave their own history. But the love affair between the seventeen-year-old girl and Jewish food was born in this event.
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย <<They are grated like this>>, said Doรฑa Berta, moving her right hand up and down. In the sixties there was no processor, and food was cooked as it was thought to be: direct and without twists. David had accepted the invitation: a sure candidate. Doรฑa Berta repeated the grating with an onion and once again showed her daughter the energy with which she had to carry out the fundamental first step. Cata imitated her, first with the potato and then with the rest. The mother, upon verifying the inherited skill, placed her left hand to her heart and uttered her oi vei, which sounded like a lament, but which Cata knew how to interpret; Doรฑa Berta’s oi veis had nuances that only family and friends could decipher; This was one of satisfaction, joy, pleasure, pride…
Three decades later, Catalina heaved a sigh that made her resemble her motherโdespite their twenty-five years and twenty-five kilos differenceโwhen she contemplated the dressed-up young men who, like politicians, left the kitchen wing towards the living room and the two hundred diners. The banner of battle they carried high contained crispy latkes, there were potato latkes, eggplant latkes, matzah flour latkes, chickpea flour latkes…
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย There sophistication in the recipes reached unimaginable levels. As unimaginable as the enjoyment that Cathy Rosenfeld’s face tried to hide. And yes, that was her weakness. The delicacies came out and aromas, flavors, textures entered. For five years it was the only good thing she had. The other good thing had died with David, her husband.
She swore to be faithful. There was no other man in her life. All her energyโwhich was a lot and voraciousโwould be poured into the kitchen. And so, her fame and fortune grew. But was she happy? No. A resounding and hard no like an old beiale.
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย Flapping tongues commented that the deceased, poor thing, hadn’t known how to say no to her at the table or in bed, and she, with the aphrodisiac ingredients she used in her meals, ended up putting an end to it. In a figurative sense, it is clear, because David always fervently finished what his wife offered him, and without saying a word. Walnuts and dates adorned the nightstands in the double bedroom. And pepper and nutmeg were added to multiple spices to season broths, blintzes, prakes, knishes, varenikes, puddings, fish, kneidlej…
Catalina, Cata, Cathy, gained consolation by saying that he had left finally with the placid gesture of a baby who falls asleep while breastfeeding. He remembered the menu of the fatal night, and the lace nightgown with which she surprised him. After eating homemade pastrami, brushing your teeth should be deep and thorough; Remaining meat fibers can cause bad breath in addition to other ailments. That’s what Cata thought, what perhaps her David would have thoughtโhe didn’t abandon the brush, the sink, or the bottle mirrorโin the dazzling presence of black lace.
He looked at his teeth and she looked at his naked torso.
She lowered the straps of the nightgown and her warm udders rested on his broad back. He brushed and brushed, and she rubbed and scrubbed. He pressed, pressed against the sink; her, against him. David used to compare his wife’s breasts with the tasty smoked breasts that she cooked for him every Wednesday.
ย ย ย ย ย ย The other days were also filled with delicacies, but they were a surprise. On Wednesdays, the surprise came later; always a new nightgown and a new way of doing it, love, not the nightgown, which was made in Paris like almost all of Catherine Rosenfeld’s underwear. Because Cathy, even when she was Catherine Goldsmith, had her demands. Sheets, tablecloths, soutienes and underwear had to be soft and perfect. Perfection that after the aforementioned episode of the first dinner and the latkes of the debut (in every sense) would reach the peaks. Summit that not only David climbed, but also had relatives and friends as devoted mountaineers. No one could resist the seduction of her meals. It was like refusing a sunset on the beach or the magic of a kiss under the moon. Everyone dreamed of sharing her table, and there were even daring people who dreamed of sharing her bed. I forgot to say that Catherine had been a good Yiddish meidele and still continued to be. Mature. But juicy and fragrant like a fountain of cherries. And that was precisely the dessert that had been agreed upon with Jesica Weitzman’s parents. At the climax of their bat-mitzva gustatory euphoria, the flesh of the flambรฉed cherries would ignite the palates and the crotch. She had already experienced it. And it was lit in advance, without taking her eye off the pots, pans and dishes. On the counter, the platters with herrings represented her own existence, all the salt, all the exquisiteness, all the aroma, but no color. She began to arrange, around the solitary herrings, slices of onion, tomato, and the plump and essential black olives. She adorns the plate as if she were adorning herself for a man’s visit. Looks, perhaps, but visits…The black satin dress turned Cathy into another olive that provoked the bite. The chef passed by her as if accidentally brushing against her. But he wanted to. Catalina tooโdespite her promise of chastity that forbade itโand said oi vei under her breath. The chef, a burly fifty-year-old man, understood that it was not a sigh of fatigue, he swallowed the oi mame, because his mother, from beyond, would have reproached him as an iconic father with marriageable daughters who occupied his mind with anything other than marrying them, the one who wanted to get married was him, but he was already married. And the object of her desire and torment had dedicated her widowhood to gastronomy. A tear that was confused with sweat moistened Saรบl Steinberg’s well-shaven cheeks. He was a clean man and an efficient cook. She efficiently cleaned her face and her thoughts before setting about whipping the cream (lest it break up).
Catalina, still shocked by the brushing by, concentrated her favors and fervor on the decoration of guefilte fish. On each fish ball, she placed a slice of boiled carrot, she could not avoid associations. The simple gesture reminded her of other gestures and other roundness, years ago, next to the French-style cabinet in his maternal home. In that house he had learned the secrets of cooking and love. Because the mother, always busy, the father, always distracted, and the brothers, always studying or at the club, left them a free dining room.
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย She arranged dishes and delicacies on the white tablecloth; and David disposed as he pleased. This is how they had mixed the pleasures of sex with those of food for Catalina. And caress goes, bite comes, the upper and lower lips synchronized actions and sucks. Thus, making and savoring, it became part of his life. It evoked school teachings and implied that sheโwith all due respectโwas just like her admired mystical poets. She felt like Sor Juana, like Saint Teresa, except that she had replaced the pen with the ladle. She thought about all of this as she dipped the spoon into the sauce with which she would coat the chicken blintzes and listened to the noise of the mixerโwhich Saรบl had startedโas if it were an extra heart. How fast does it beat? The culprit was the vapor from the wine that had just been poured into the sauce. Perhaps that mist had reached Eduviges, who was shelling almonds sitting in a corner. Eduviges crossed herself. It must have been the devil’s work; She, resigned to being single, to work and to charitable tasks, had no peace since the day she had set foot in Cathy Rosenfeld Receptions. What were these hot flashes? The doctor diagnosed: menopause. His conscience, fever. She was like a cat in heat; especially when the lady entered the kitchen and, with fairy hands, chopped, seasoned, coated, bakedโฆ The aromas and the recipesโwhich she generously made her assistants tryโmade her dizzier than the homemade tangerine liqueur, Eduviges’ only vice. When the lady told her how to sweat, Eduviges blushed. Of course, the lady had seen her get drenched in sweat, shake herself as if she had a fever and then exclaim, oi vei. Eduviges thought that saying oi vei was a kind of exorcism because as soon as he said it, the lady’s face changed. Then Eduviges learned to say oi vei. Cathy was happy with the helper who, in addition to having interpreted the spirit of Jewish food, had adopted idioms and sayings.
Carlos Kravetz (1953-) viviรณ en Israel y Alemania. Se formรณ en Avni Institute of Fine Arts, Tel Aviv, en talleres con Emilio Renart y M. Stempelsztejn, y en estudios con diversos teรณricos del arte. Tambiรฉn estudiรณ Arquitectura en la FADU (UBA) y en el Technion, Haifa. Expone en Argentina desde 1979 y fuera del paรญs desde 1991.
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Carlos Kravetz (1953-) lived in Israel and Germany. He trained at Avni Institute of Fine Arts, Tel Aviv, in workshops with Emilio Renart and M. Stempelsztejn, and in studies with various art theorists. He also studied Architecture at FADU (UBA) and at the Technion, Haifa. He has exhibited in Argentina since 1979 and outside the country since 1991.
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Carlos Kravetz comenta sobre su arte:
Me preocupa mostrar, aunque sea parcialmente, la realidad que me circunda, las cosas que me pasan a mรญ y a otros… Buenos Aires es un marco de fondo, pero que condiciona: la gente expresa de alguna manera la presiรณn a que la somete la vida en nuestra ciudad. Eso se percibe en cada gesto si observamos con atenciรณn. Me preocupa tambiรฉn el paso del tiempo, modificรกndonos. ะฃ exagerando nuestros valores o defectos. Y me preocupan la locura y ese espacio sutil entre ella y aquello considerado normal. Quiero mostrar eso sin ‘lavar’ mi obra, expresando plรกsticamente toda la belleza contenida en la fealdad, la vejez o la locura, que no es justamente la belleza clรกsica. Me interesa mostrar una parte de la realidad: dar mi aporte para que el arte estรฉ menos separado de la vida: no me interesa para nada un arte de especulaciรณn metafรญsica, sino de una reflexiรณn sobre lo cotidiano que permita que nos reconozcamos en รฉl; un arte que no se disocie devolviendo imรกgenes que no nos pertenecen. . .
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Carlos Kravetz comments on his art:
I am concerned about showing, even partially, the reality that surrounds me, the things that happen to me and othersโฆ Buenos Aires is a background setting, but one that conditions: people express in some way the pressure to which they are subjected by life in our city. This can be perceived in each gesture if we look carefully. I am also concerned about the passage of time, changing us, exaggerating our values โโor defects. And I am concerned about madness and that subtle space between it and what is considered normal. I want to show that without ‘washing’ my work, plastically expressing all the beauty contained in ugliness, old age or madness, which is not exactly classical beauty. I am interested in showing a part of reality: giving my contribution so that art is less separated from life: I am not at all interested in an art of metaphysical speculation, but rather a reflection on the everyday that allows us to recognize ourselves in it; an art that does not dissociate itself by returning images that do not belong to us. . .
Nacรญ en la Ciudad de Mรฉxico en 1954. El arte me ha acompaรฑado a lo largo de mi vida: la palabra escrita, la fotografรญa, la pinturaโy el tango. Mi pasiรณn es la narrativa.
Fundรฉ con Gumercinda Camino, La Gramรกtica de la Fantasรญa (1984), el primer taller en Mรฉxico de cuento infantil, dirigido por Guillermo Samperio.
Un Asalto Mayรบsculo (VN 1985), cuento para niรฑos, obtuvo el Premio Ezra Jack Keats (Nueva York, 1986). Se encuentra en la biblioteca de la ONU.
Publiquรฉ โAntianuncios y Recetario para ser felizโ (revista Comercio) y cuento corto (revistas El Cuento y Cronopio).
Participรฉ en los talleres de los escritores Agustรญn Monsreal, Ricardo Diazmuรฑoz, Elena Poniatowska, Ricardo Garibay y recientemente Josรฉ Kozer.
Vida Propia (novela, Miguel รngel Porrรบa, 2000) fue finalista en el V Premio Nacional de Novela. La escritora Esther Seligson comentรณ: โNovela obligada en la mesa de noche de cualquier persona que se considere feminista.โ
Quiรฉn es otro (cuento, El Bรบho, 2002) obtuvo el primer lugar del Premio Nacional de Literatura y Artes.
Publiquรฉ Lilith, la Otra Carta de Dios (narrativa poรฉtica, Miguel รngel Porrรบa, 2002).
Desde 2010 publico y participo en la ediciรณn del San Diego Poetry Annual.
Escribรญ las letras de las canciones infantiles de Las Nubes Panzonas (CD grabado en 2012). La canciรณn โA ti mi lingua floridaโ (en ladino) fue catalogada en la colecciรณn de mรบsica sefaradรญ de la Biblioteca Nacional en Jerusalรฉn.
Improbables (Editorial Acapulco, 2017, cuento corto), fue co-autorado con pinturas de Marianela de la Hoz.
En este blog, desde 2018, hago entregas mensuales de Harinas de Otro Costal, (minificciones al grano, ediciones En El Horno).
Aquรญ tambiรฉn entrego selecciones de Otros Peligros Circulares (poesรญa, 2021, por publicar), y antiguos y nuevos textos.
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I am Vicky Nizri.
I was born in Mexico City in 1954. Art has accompanied me throughout my life: the written word, photography, painting โ and tango. My passion is narrative.
With Gumercinda Camino, I founded La Gramatica de la Fantasรญa (1984), the first childrenโs story workshop in Mexico, directed by Guillermo Samperio.
Un Asalto Mayรบsculo (VN 1985), a childrenโs story, won the Ezra Jack Keats Award (New York, 1986). It is in the UN library.
I published Antianuncios y Recetario para ser Feliz (Comercio magazine) and short story (El Cuento and Cronopio magazines).
I participated in the workshops of the writers Agustรญn Monsreal, Ricardo Diazmuรฑoz, Elena Poniatowska, Ricardo Garibay and recently Josรฉ Kozer.
Vida Propia (novel, Miguel รngel Porrรบa, 2000) was a finalist in the V National Novel Prize. Writer Esther Seligson commented: โA must-have novel on the nightstand of anyone who considers himself a feminist.โ
Quiรฉn es otro (short story, El Bรบho, 2002) won first place in the Premio Nacional de Literatura y Artes.
I published Lilith, la Otra Carta de Dios (poetic narrative, Miguel รngel Porrรบa, 2002).
Since 2010 I have published and participated in the edition of the San Diego Poetry Annual.
I wrote the lyrics for the childrenโs songs of Las Nubes Panzonas (CD recorded in 2012). The song โA ti mi lingua floridaโ (in Ladino) was cataloged in the Sephardic music collection of the National Library in Jerusalem.
Improbables (Editorial Acapulco, 2017, short story), was co-authored with paintings by Marianela de la Hoz. In this blog, since 2018, I make monthly deliveries of Harinas de Otro Costal, (mini-fictions to the grain, En El Horno editions).
Here I also deliver selections from Otros Peligros Circulares (poetry, 2021, to be published), and old and new texts.
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“Vida propia:
Basada en la vida de Esther Shoenfeld”
por Vicky Nizri
De:/From: Vicky Nizri. Vida propia: Basada en the vida de Esther Shoenfeld. CDMX: Miguel รngel Porrรบa, 2000. Kindle.
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-Ben, kerida, kero charlar con vos.
Enreda sus brazos por mis hombros, me acerca, me toma la mano, suspira, acaricia mi pelo como cuando niรฑa, mis mejillas, suspira. Sin darse cuenta tararea, calladito, por adentro. Me acaricia, suspira:
–Esterika –dice, por fin, luego de una pausa-, el Sr. Komenfeld me demandรณ la tu mano.
El tono me deja fosil.
–No te uvligo, ยกhas be jalila! Yo pensรณ ke es mazal bono para ti, ma tรบ dirรกsh.
Con voz fragmentada, desarticulada toda:
-Pero Papรก quรฉ me estรก usted diciendo.
-Max es hombre trabajador y mucho, muy honrado, ยฟacaso no buscas un joven que no demandara dote? Aรญde, aรญ lo tenรฉsh.
-No, papรก, por favor, no me haga usted eso. Quiero regresar a casa. No me deje aquรญ sola, papรก, ยฟy mis hermanos, mis estudios? ยฟy lo que hablamos en el barco?, yo creลฟ que lo considera.
-Allรญ, te dio kon esto de studiar, ya me perforaste el meoyo; aranka tiralanyas de quekavesa i pone las patchรกs en la tierra. Ya tengo culpa por prestar oลฟdos a tanta bobada.
Se me demora el aliento. Por fracciรณn de segundos qued desfallecida. Quiero recurrir a la memoria, esta seca, deshabitada. Mi vida, mi pasado, han desaparecido, no me pertenecen. En ese cascarรณn hueco no hay nada, no solo retazo pensamiento, ni una palabra brรบjula. Cuando todo se calla, el silencio vocifera zumbidos perpetuos, ensordece. Estoy ensordecida. La garganta \, calzada de fluidos amargos, asesina las palabras. Quedo muda. Temblando por el miedo de faltarle respeto, logro concentrar un pensamiento, atemorizada lo transmito:
-Mentira, papรก, a usted nunca le ha interesado mis cosas. Jamรกs me ha escuchado, no conoce la mรกs menuda de mis emociones. Usted se conforma con que yo sea igualita a las de mi pueblo. Con eso tiene de sobra.
Guardo silencio.
Vengo de una raza de mujeres condenadas a movimientos circulares donde no hay lugar para las alas, para el vuelo hacia otros universos. Prohibido avanzar o retroceder la lรญnea marcada. Mujeres dรณciles, quietas, obedientes, pero sobre todo inconclusas, dadas a perderse en ellos, a reflejar a la luz de ellas, astros relucientes; mujeres incapaces de apropiarse de nada, ni siquiera de sus pensamientos. Incubradoras de un solo anhelo: ser poseรญdas, denotadas asรญ, aรบn mรกs, su condiciรณn de esclavas. Mujeres cuyo cometido es llenar y rellenarse las entraรฑas; hacedoras de hijos, transmisoras del germen.
-No, papรก, no me obligue a seguir los pasos de mi madre, de la nona, de las guardianas. Sรกleme de estar procesiรณn de sonรกmbulas.
–Faz komo kerรกsh โ y mi padre se pone serio, ya te lo dije: no te obligo a nada, pero llegando a casa olvรญdate de la escuela. Es ora de bushkar marido i bash a kontentarse con el mazal ke te tope.
-Papรก, usted no comprende, si me deja aquรญ me muero.
–Pensรกs kel tu padre ba desharte onde vos akonteshka entuerto? No estรกs sola, el tรญo Beny va a ver por ti como si fuera su hija. Alma mรญa, comprende, yo sรฉ lo que te digo, al lado de Max, nada te va a mankar, vas a tener vida buena y abundante. ยฟA kuรกlo tornar a Temuko, kerida? Pero piรฉnsalo inteligentemente, recuerda que tรญo Beny y tu padre sรณlo buscamos tu bien, de otro modo no tenรญamos por que haber venido hasta Mรฉxico.
Papรก me abraza, me besa, cada quien a su cuarto. Arde la garganta de contener la ira. Este destino que me anuncia me naufraga. Quiero hablar con alguien, con mamรก. Sentada sobre la cama revivo la maรฑana de nuestra despedida. La memoria regresa con sorprendentes brillos. Su llanto, su turbaciรณn, esa extraรฑa manera en que fue cariรฑosa, el รกlbum de fotografรญas. Ella lo sabรญa todo, por eso nada me consola al seรฑor Konenfeld como se salda una cabeza de ganado. ยกQuรฉ engaรฑo!, y ese tal seรฑor Konenfeld con su cara de pollo desplumado, tambiรฉn es cรณmplice de este plan maldito. Pienso tambiรฉn en la conversaciรณn con รฉmi padre en el barco: โPide lo ke te kersh alma mรญaโ y yo confiada que este viaje es un privilegio otorgado por primogenitura. Es una trampa, una astucia urdida por expertos mercaderes. Zurcido invisible. Golpeo y muerdo la almohada, mi piel escupe un sudor envenenado; mi cuerpo una secreciรณn antigua, asiento de aรฑosos caldos. Laten las sienes con fuerza inaudita, los ojos se nublan, quedo ciega. Todo es culpa de esa luna que sangra cada veintiocho dรญas, que me pesa conciencia sierpe; luna hembra, estรบpida luna, nos ha embaucado. Ha caรญdo en una treta conocido a fuego manso. Una mรกs de sus maniobras comerciales, timadores de ingenuos. Amabilidades y atenciones cargadas de propรณsito: una buena venta. Con razรณn el seรฑor Max no se despega, รฉl es el cliente interesado. Ese hombre recluido en su caparazรณn de lana gris, estrangulado por la negrura de su luto, al igual de los demรกs, forma parte del engaรฑo. No puedo creer que algo asรญ me suceda, no quiero; pero esta vaquilla no se va a dejar poner el cencerro asรญ no mรกs. Por quรฉ me tenรญa que pasar esto, por quรฉ yo. Es un castigo. Claro, no puede ser otra cosa. Asรญ son los designios divinos, basta con desear algo con toda el alma para que suceda lo contrario, bien merecido lo tengo que desearlo tanto, universidad, amor, amigos; por renegar de los rezos y rechazar mi condiciรณn femenina, por cuestionarme y cuestionarlos. Sabรญa muy bien que Dios no pasarรญa por alto de lo espejo, ha lanzado contra mรญ su castigo: esa es mi suerte sierpe, no puedo escaparla; estoy vendida. Tal vez, si ofrezco un sacrificio, algo grande a cambio de mi libertad, quizรก asรญ, por obra de su merced, quede a salvo del destino. Guardo en el baรบl la luz de tanto sueรฑo inรบtil, hasta el รบltimo pespunte de anhelos malogrados. Esa luz conformada de recuerdos, de nostalgias, de ojos y bocas y manos y gargantas. Queda โEl Porvenirโ en el pasado, confitado โPorvenirโ flotando en la periferia de mi pueblo, de mi casa de mi niรฑez clara.
Me paro frente a la ventana, miro hacia arriba, una extraรฑa decanta:
-Eres Tรบ, Dios, el responsable de lo que me ha sucedido. Tรบ les enseรฑaste a vender mujeres, es Tu ley la que obedecen estos hombres disfrazados de justos, pueblo de elegidos, ยฟelegidos?, si acaso ellos, lo dudo. ยกTรบ me vendiste! Entonces รฉsta era la sorpresa que me aguardaba, para eso trinรฉ en las maรฑanas nuevos cantos, ยฟEn quรฉ momento se nos escurren las cosas, leche tibia entre las manos?, adรณnde se van los sueรฑos que se pierden?
ยฟVas a castigarme por irreverente? ยฟQuรฉ vas a hacerme ahora?, ยฟdesmenuzar mi cuerpo con polilla?, ยฟdejarme ciega, muda? Anda, ยกhazlo! Que de nada me han servido ni los ojos ni mi boca. No me importa. Me has expulsado ya tantas veces del paraรญso: soy Eva, serpiente en quien recae el dolor de la raza humana, y Edith, la curiosa piedra salada. Jamรกs escuchรฉ que Adรกn haya recibido castigo alguno por mรฉritos propios; o que a Lot le hayas hecho algo cuando ofreciรณ a sus hijas vรญrgenes, inocentes. ยฟQuรฉ leyes rigen este pueblo de elegidos? ยฟQuรฉ va a pasarme da mรญ? Dios mรญo, por el amor de Dios no me hagas esto.
Dejo de temblar, me paro firme, el dolor se ha transformado en una extraรฑa sensaciรณn de triunfo.
-Asรญ que se trata de un negocio entre hombres y no tengo escapatoria; muy bien, no te olvides que yo tambiรฉn sรฉ negociar, y voy a ver por mis conveniencias. Al buen sol hay que abrirle la puerta y el seรฑor Konenfeld es una magnรญfica oportunidad. ยฟNo es cierto, Dios?
Los sentimientos dan cauce a las palabras y puedo continuar mi diรกlogo mรกs diรกfano.
-ยฟTal vez has olvidad la clase de futuro que me espera en Temuco? ยฟIgnoras que sin dote me casarรกn con el primero que se asome?, con un tonto que me llenarรก de hijos y me encarcelarรก en la pequeรฑa existencia de mi pequeรฑo pueblo. ยฟIgnoras que a los diecinueve aรฑos ya no soy una moza y pronto me convertirรฉ en vergรผenza para mis padres, un peso? Yo tambiรฉn voy a sacar provecho de las oportunidades, Dios. Si no me subo en este tren, acabarรฉ siendo una infeliz solterona dedicada a labores sin provecho y sin maรฑana.
Cierro los ojos con fuerza y deseo que la furia de Dios azote sobre mรญ y corte de golpe la pena.
Abro la ventana, un olor azul de diciembre me lastima, miro al cielo, hay trรกnsito de nubes, chocan unas contra otras:
– ยฟTe olvida, Dios, ยฟdel trabajo que papรก y mamรก todavรญa tienen por delante con sus siete hijos?, siete escuelas, dotes, matrimonios que negociar. Despuรฉs de todo, no amo tanto mi tierra no los bosques, ni tambiรฉn la escarcha no los volcanes ni el viento helado, ni tampoco me hace falta el silencio de praderas. Mejor si ya no me asoma a la nieve a mi ventana y mis hermanos no arrebatan mi pan y mamรก no me obliga a las interminables faenas de la casa,
Con la tristeza vuelve el llanto. Trato de convencerme:
No es un castigo, no es un castigo. Quedo en Mรฉxico por mi propio bien, por mi propio bien. Soy malazuda, malazuda, malazuda. Lo repito tantas veces como las fuerzas la permiten. Sรณlo asรญ logro aplacar la rabia. Comprendo que no hay otro camino, que se acabarรกn por siempre las carencias, que ahora estarรฉ en posiciรณn de ayudar a mi familia. Sรญ, รฉsta es mi oportunidad. Casada con un hombre rico asegurarรฉ beneficios incalculables; una entradita mensual, un negocio, dotes, buenos partidos para mis hermanas. Con el apoyo de tรญo Beny y de Max sacarรฉ a papรก de pobre. Casada con un hombre prominente y educado, me educarรฉ, conocerรฉ el mundo. Quรฉ importa si el seรฑor Konenfeld es callado, si viste de oscuro y nunca sonrรญe. Cambiarรก con los aรฑos, espero. A su lado habrรก abundancia, nada nos faltarรก nada.
Anestesiada por la ilusiรณn, atraรญda como insecto alrededor de un foco que deslumbra, me entristece reconocer que en mi boda no estarรกn mi familia ni amigos, la fiesta serรก linda, no lo dudo, pero sin los mรญos, los mรญos. Buenos, no se puede todo en esta vida, les mandarรฉ por correo las fotos; ya me imagino la cara que pondrรก Susana Alaballi cuando las vea; se dotarรก de envidia. En poco tiempo visitarรฉ mi pueblo, convertida en Doรฑa Esther Negrรญn de Konenfeld. Con ese pensamiento me introduzco en la cama. Caigo, caigo profunda en el encandilamiento del sueรฑo.
Temuco, Chile en la รฉpoca de la novela/Temuco, Chile at the time of the novel
Colonia Roma, Ciudad Mรฉxico, en la รฉpoca de la novela/Colonia Roma, Mexico City, at the time of the novel
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“Vida propia: Basada en la vida de Esther Shoenfeld”
By
Vicky Nizri
X, I
-Ben, kerida, kero charlar con vos.
He puts his arms over my shoulder, approaches me, takes my hand, sighs, caresses my hair as when I was a little girl, my cheeks, he sighs. Without realizing it, he hums, very quietly, inside. He caresses me, sighs.
–Esterika, he says, finally, after a pause, โ
el Sr. Komenfeld me demandรณ la tu mano.
His tone left me like a fossil.
-No te uvligo, ยกhas be jalila! Yo pensรณ ke es mazal bono para ti, ma tรบ dirรกsh.
With a fragmented voice, everything in bits:
-But Papa, what are you saying to me?
-Max is a hard-working man and very, very honorable. ยฟWere you looking for a man who wouldnโt ask for a dowry? Aรญde, aรญ lo tenรฉsh.
-No, papa, please donโt do that to me I want to go home. Donโt leave me here alone, And what about my brothers and sisters, my studies? And what we talked about in the ship? I believed that you were considering them?
-Allรญ, te dio kon esto de studiar, ya me perforaste el meoyo; aranka tiralanyas de quekavesa i pone las patchรกs en la tierra. Itโs my fault for listening to such nonsense.
My breath slows, For a fraction of a second. I felt feel faint. My life, my past have disappeared. They donโt belong to me. In this empty shell, there is nothing, not even a bit of thought nor a guiding word. When everything quiets down, the silence shouts out unending buzzing; it is deafening. I am deaf. My throat, full of bitter fluid, murders the words. I remain mute. Trembling in fear of showing him a lack of respect, I succeed in composing a thought, terrified, I say it:
-Thatโs a lie, papa. You have never been interested in my things. You have never listened to me. You donโt know the smallest bit of my emotions. You think that I am the same as the others in my town. Thatโs more than enough for you.
I am silent.
I come from a race of women condemned to circular movements where there is no place for wings, for the flight toward other universes. Prohibited to advance or pull back from the marked line. Docile, quiet, obedient women, but above all incomplete, given to lose themselves, to reflect their light, shining stars: women uncapable of taking advantage of anything, not even their thought, incubators of only one wish: to be possessed, denoted so, even more, their condition as slaves. Women whose job it is to fill and refill the guts, maker of sons, transmitter of the seed.
–No, papa, donโt forcรฉ me to follow in my motherโs footsteps, of nona, of the gaurdians. Let me out of this procession of sleepwalkers.
–Faz komo kerรกsh -and my father became serious. -I already told you that I donโt oblige you to do anything, but coming home, forget school.Es ora de bushkar marido i bash a kontentarse con el mazal ke te tope.
-Papa, you donโt understand, Iโll die, if you leave me here.
–Pensรกs kel tu padre ba desharte onde vos akonteshka entuerto? You arenโt alone. Uncle Beny will watch you as if you were his own daughter. My Soul, understand, I know what Iโm saying to you, with Max, nada te va a mankar. You will have a good and abundant life. ยฟA kuรกlo tornar a Temuko, kerida? But think about it intelligently, remember that Uncle Beny and your father are looking out for benefit. We didnโt have another reason to have come to Mexico.
My breasts beat with intense force, my eyes fog over, I am blind. It is all the fault of that moon that bleeds every twenty-eight days, that weighs on me as a serpent consciousness, female moon, stupid moon, has duped us. It has fallen into a trap, known for docile fire. One more of the commercial maneuvers, trickers of the ingenuous. I canโt believe that something like that is happening to me. Acts of kindness and affection effected for a reason: a good sale. With good reason, Mr. Max didnโt pull away; he is the interested client. That man, shut up in that shell of gray wool, strangle by the blackness of his grief, just like the rest of them, part of the trick. I canโt believe that something like this is happening to me, I donโt want it, but on this little cow will not put on the cowbell, just like that. Why does this have to happen to me. Why me? Itโs a punishment. Of course, it canโt be anything else. Itโs Godโs will, enough about desiring something with all your soul so that the opposite happen, well-deserved, I want it all so much: university, love, amigos, to renege on the prayers and reject my feminine condition. I know very well that God would not ignore what happened with the mirror. He has thrown toward me his punishment. That is my severe punishment. I canโ escape it; I am sold. Perhaps, if I offer a sacrifice, something great in exchange for my freedom, perhaps then, through the work of your mercy, I will be safe from fate. I keep in the trunk the light of so much useless dream, until the last stitch of failed desires. That light made up of memories, nostalgia, eyes and mouths and hands and throats. โEl Porvenirโ remains in the past, a preserved โFutureโ floating on the periphery of my town, of my clear childhood home.
I stand in front of the window, look up, a strange decantation:
-You, God, are responsible for what has happened to me. You taught them to sell women, it is Your law that these men obey, disguised as just, a people of the chosen, chosen? If anything, I doubt it. You sold me! So this was the surprise that awaited me, for that I trilled new songs in the mornings, At what moment do things slip away from us, warm milk between our hands? Where do the dreams that are lost go? Are you going to punish me for being irreverent? What are you going to do to me now? Shred my body with moths? Leave me blind, mute? Come on, do it! That neither my eyes nor my mouth have been of any use to me. I don’t mind. You have already expelled me from paradise so many times: I am Eve, the serpent on whom the pain of the human race falls, and Edith, the curious salty stone. I have never heard that Adam received any punishment for his own merits; or that you did something to Lot when he offered his virgin, innocent daughters. What laws govern this chosen town? What is going to happen to me? Oh my God, for the love of God don’t do this to me.
I stop shaking, I stand firm, the pain has transformed into a strange sensation of triumph.
-So this is a business between men and I have no escape; very good, don’t forget that I also know how to negotiate, and I’m going to see what suits me best. You have to open the door to the good sun and Mr. Konenfeld is a magnificent opportunity. Isn’t that true, God? Feelings give channel to words and I can continue my clearest dialogue.
-Perhaps you have forgotten the kind of future that awaits me in Temuco? Do you not know that without a dowry they will marry me to the first person who appears? To a fool who will fill me with children and imprison me in the small existence of my small town. Do you not know that at nineteen I am no longer a girl and will soon become an embarrassment to my parents, a burden? I’m also going to take advantage of opportunities, God. If I don’t get on this train, I will end up being an unhappy spinster dedicated to work without profit and without tomorrow.
I close my eyes tightly and wish that the fury of God would strike me and cut off the pain.
I open the window, a blue smell of December hurts me, I look at the sky, there are clouds passing by, they collide against each other:
– Have you forgotten, God, the work that dad and mom still have ahead of them with their seven children? Seven schools, dowries, marriages to negotiate. After all, I don’t love my land so much, not the forests, nor the frost, the volcanoes, nor the icy wind, nor do I need the silence of the meadows. Better if the snow no longer looks out my window and my brothers don’t snatch my bread and mom doesn’t force me to do endless chores around the house.
With sadness the crying returns.
I try to convince myself:
It’s not a punishment, it’s not a punishment. I stay in Mexico for my own good, for my own good. I’m bad, bad, bad. I repeat it as many times as my strength allows. Only in this way can I calm my anger. I understand that there is no other way, that lack will forever end, that now I will be in a position to help my family. Yes, this is my chance. Married to a rich man I will ensure incalculable benefits; a monthly income, a business, dowries, good matches for my sisters. With the support of Uncle Beny and Max I will get dad out of poverty. Married to a prominent and educated man, I will educate myself, I will see the world. What does it matter if Mr. Konenfeld is quiet, if he dresses in dark clothes and never smiles. It will change over the years, I hope. At his side there will be abundance, we will lack nothing.
Anesthetized by the illusion, attracted like an insect around a dazzling spotlight, it saddens me to recognize that my family and friends will not be at my wedding, the party will be nice, I don’t doubt it, but without mine, mine. Well, you can’t do everything in this life, I’ll send you the photos by email; I can already imagine the face that Susana Alaballi will make when she sees them; will be endowed with envy. In a short time I will visit my town, becoming Doรฑa Esther Negrรญn de Konenfeld. With that thought I get into bed. I fall, I fall deep into the daze of sleep
Nora Glickman es profesora emรฉrita de Literatura Hispรกnica en Queens College y en el Graduate Center, CUNY. Su obra crรญtica incluye โRegeneraciรณnโ de Leib Malach y la trata de blancas, The Jewish White Slave Trade: The Case of Raquel Liberman, El inglรฉs en el teatro y el cine rioplatense, y los cuentos, Puerta entre abierta; Mujeres, memorias, malogros; Uno de sus Juanes; Hilvรกn de instantes. Varias de sus obras estรกn reunidas en el Teatro de Nora Glickman y en su antologรญa bilingรผe. De Suburban News recibiรณ el Premio Jerome para jรณvenes dramaturgos en 1990. Dos Charlottes aparece en Dramaturgas en la escena del mundo. Es co-editora de las Publicaciones de la Asociaciรณn de Estudios Judรญos Latinoamericanos y de Enclave: Revista de Creaciรณn Literaria en Espaรฑol. Entre 1998 y 2010 fue editora asociada de Modern Jewish Studies/Yiddish. Se desempeรฑa como editora de reseรฑas de libros para la revista Latin American Jewish Studies.
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Nora Glickman is a professor emerita of Hispanic Literature at Queens College and at the Graduate Center, CUNY. Her critical work includes โRegeneraciรณnโ de Leib Malach y la trata de blancas, The Jewish White Slave Trade: The Case of Raquel Liberman, El inglรฉs en el teatro y el cine rioplatense, and the short stories, Puerta entre abierta; Mujeres, memorias, malogros; Uno de sus Juanes; Hilvรกn de instantes. Several of her plays are gathered in Teatro de Nora Glickman, and in her bilingual anthology. From Suburban News, she received the Jerome Award for young dramatists in 1990. Dos Charlottes appears in Dramaturgas en la escena del mundo. She is the co-editor of the Latin American Jewish Studies Association Publications, and of Enclave: Revista de Creaciรณn Literaria en Espaรฑol. Between 1998 and 2010 she was Associate Editor of Modern Jewish Studies/Yiddish. She serves as Book Review Editor for the journal Latin American Jewish Studies.
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De:/From: Nora Glickman. Hilvรกn de instantes. Santiago de Chile: RIL Editores, 2015.
Casi un Shiduj
DE HABERL0 SABIDOโฆ hubiera sido el shiduj perfecto. Lo digo yo, que sรฉ de shidujim. Veo un hombre solo, culto, refinado. Y enseguida pienso en alguna mujer sola, culta, refinada, con algรบn pequeรฑo vicio que mantendrรก, como รฉl, discretamente guardado. Los conecto; juntos se encontrarรกn bien: armonizan en su estilo de vida, se mueven en un mismo ambiente. Dos almas en armonรญa.
Ellos podrรกn insistir, si quieren, que estรกn perfectamente satisfechos de seguir solteros; pero yo no los creo. Somos animales sociales; macho y hembra necesitamos el calor de nuestro sexo y del opuesto; para mรญ, que unidos oficialmente como pareja casada, tendrรกn mรกs oportunidades. Separados, digo, no saben lo que se pierden; la voz de ella desde el aeropuerto para tranquilizarlo, avisรกndole que ya estรก de vuelta a casa; un comentario gracioso de รฉl, que ella le celebre, aunque lo haya oรญdo antes mรกs de una vez.
De todos modos, los junto sin que nadie los pida. Instinto de shadjente, digo yo, Manรญa de casamentera. A veces, claro, me equivoco, como con Ema y Julio, la pareja perfecta. El pelo caprichosamente rizado de ambos, el de Ema mรกs clara y sedoso; la mirada pรญcara de Julio, que ella festeja a cada paso. Los dos aficionados de la mรบsica clรกsica, los dos locos por el cine y por hacer largas caminatas en la costanera. ยฟQuiรฉn hubiera podido adivinar que eran, en efecto, hermanos sanguรญneos, distanciados al nacer? Eso era digno de una telenovela. Cleopatra, o Calรญgula, de enterarse que tenรญan un hermano por esposo, me hubieran nombrado embajadora por haber urgido su matrimonio. Ema y Julio, en cambio, lejos de agradecerme, se sienten culpables haberse enamorados y me reprochan por haber propiciado un amor incestuoso.
Sin embargo, yo persevero aunque no doy siempre con la tecla. Aun al mejor cazador se le escapa el libre. ยกQuรฉ fracaso, mi รบltimo intento! Cuando a Richler lo abandonรณ su esposa por otra mujer, convinimos que, en las primeras semanas, no lo agobiarรญamos con llamadas, pero que Beatriz se ocuparรญa por รฉl para aliviar su depresiรณn, tal vez su vergรผenza, porque Richler no podรญa comprender lo que le habรญa pasado. Mientras tanto yo le iba preparando candidatas para cuando se sintiera repuesto. Luego de treinta y cinco aรฑos de casado, Richler no sabรญa arreglรกrselas solo. Ese primer aรฑo le costรณ mucha salud, fรญsica y mental: una pulmonรญa lo dejรณ postrado por semanas enteras. Su cuรฑada lo atendiรณ en el hospital, y sus hijos, solteros que vivรญan cerca de su casa, lo visitaban seguido.
Nos alarmรณ verlo cuando al comenzar el semestre Richler llegรณ a la universidad desaliรฑado y mรกs encorvado que nunca. Pobre Richler. Para reanimarlo, Beatriz y yo, y sus colegas, le planeamos una dieta macrobiรณtica y caminatas vigorosas en el parque. Lo invitamos a ver una obra de Calderรณn de la Barca que รฉl habรญa enseรฑado durante varios aรฑos. Aunque la representaciรณn era de aficionados, a รฉl le pareciรณ muy educativa. Luego de notar los olvidos y las pausas innecesarias de algunos actores, aprovechรณ la ocasiรณn para opinar con elocuencia sobre la intenciรณn del dramaturgo y la interpretaciรณn desmesurada del director de la obra. Richler saliรณ entusiasmado del espectรกculo, asรญ que cuando nos despedimos en la estaciรณn del subte, nos prometiรณ que la prรณxima vez, รฉl nos llevarรญa a ver <<Il Travatore>>. Aceptamos encantadas.
Aunque รบltimamente Beatriz estaba mรกs y mรกs ocupada con David, un novio antipรกtico que la tenรญa dominada, y no tenรญa tiempo para Richler. Yo pasรฉ un par de meses fuera de Nueva York, por lo que tuve que interrumpir la rutina de llamarlo cada semana. A mi regreso, me encontrรฉ con una invitaciรณn de Tita, para celebrar en su casa la jubilaciรณn de Richler, y tambiรฉn su compromiso, el martes 14 de octubre. Me quedรฉ pasmada.
–ยฟCรณmo tan pronto? ยฟCuรกndo decidiรณ jubilarse? ยฟY con quiรฉn se compromete?
–Con una maestra dominicana de Arizona, amiga de su cuรฑada. En un mes se casan y se van a vivir a Phoenixโme explicรณ Beatriz.
Para un judรญo gringoโneoyorquinoโde sesenta y cinco aรฑos, casarse con una latina de cuarenta y pico y mudarse a un estado tan remoto como Arizona debe ser una odisea. Llamo a Rita y ella me explica que el clima seco y templado de Arizona es ideal para aliviar el asma de Richler. Con Beatriz luego comentamos mientras nosotras todavรญa nos condolรญamos el estado miserable de Richler, รฉl habรญa conseguido rehacer su vida. Solito, sin nuestra ayuda, habรญa encontrado a su pareja: <<Entoncesโnos dijimos,–misiรณn cumplida>>.
Para la fiesta de Rita me toca llevar a varios colegas en el auto. Raquel viene tambiรฉn. Se sienta adelante conmigo, asรญ podemos conversar. No nos vemos desde hace mรกs de quince aรฑos cuando Raquel dejรณ de enseรฑar en la secundaria para hacerse cargo de una biblioteca en Bronxville. El cambio le favorece; Raquel habรญa perdido peso y se ve mรกs sofisticada. Sabรญa que Richler se jubilaba, pero solo ahora, camino a New Jersey, viene a enterarse de su compromiso.
–ยฟQuรฉ estรกs diciendo? โme susurra, incrรฉdula–. ยฟAcaso Richler no estรก casado y tiene dos hijos?
–Estaba casado, pero hace meses que estรก solo. Su hijo menor vive en el dormitorio de la universidad, y el mayor consiguiรณ empleo en Boston. ยฟPero cรณmo no enteraste, Raquel, que su mujer lo abandonรณ, y รฉl se pescรณ una pulmonรญa, y que Beatriz y yo lo ayudamos a reponerse?
Raquel esconde la cara bajo la solapa de su saco para ocultar su reacciรณn, Suspira como si le faltaba aire; le saliรณ un hipo entrecortado. Sin duda quiere hacerme mรกs preguntas y no sabe por dรณnde empezar. Menea lentamente la cabeza como si pasara lista de lo que ella habรญa estado en el interรญn, mientras Richler se enamoraba de la dominicana y decidรญa dar el gran paso. Me duele ver a Raquel sufrir asรญ, y tambiรฉn me fastidiaba. Pero, en fin, ya es demasiado tarde para cambiar las cosas.
–Simplemente, Raquel, se me pasรณ por alto. Mil perdones.
ยกQuรฉ imbรฉcil fui! ยฟCรณmo pude olvidarme durante todo este tiempo del gran metejรณn que Raquel habรญa sentido por Richler cuando las dos estudiรกbamos juntas en la universidad? Nos leรญamos las cartas apasionadas que escribรญamos a amantes ficticios y reales y nos reรญamos para cubrir el rubor de comportarnos como colegiales pavotas.
Por lo visto, el amor de Raquel por Richler durรณ mucho mรกs de la cuenta. En esos dรญas fantaseaba con raptarlo; planeaba formas de alejarlo de su mujer, de seducirlo con su profundo conocimiento de Calderรณn, y con otras estratagemas para que me llegaron a parecer tediosas. Y Richler, naturalmente, inmerso en sus teorรญas y dedicado a su materia, nunca sospechรณ que Raquel planeara seducirlo ni que su mujer pensara abandonarlo.
La voz grave y sorda de Raquel revela todo su rencor:
–No te lo puedo perdonar, Tere. ยกยฟCรณmo no me avistaste al instante?!โy mรกs bajita todavรญa agrega–: Lo siento como una traiciรณn.
–Te juro que con tanto trajรญn se me olvidรณ, Raquelita. Como Beatriz fue la primera en ayudarlo salir de su crisis, en parte me despreocupรฉ del asunto, ยฟcomprendes? Claro, de haberme acordado te habrรญa llamado, no me quepa la menor duda, pero no me acordรฉ. Lo siento.
–ยฟTuvo algo con Beatriz?
–Que yo sepa, nada. ยกNo! ยกQuรฉ ocurrencia la tuya, si Beatriz estรก loca por David, ese novio tan creรญdo que la tiene atrapada!
–Contigo tampoco, supongoโฆ
–ยกPor Dios, Raquel! Lo quiero como a un tรญo.
El viaje a New Jersey se me hace interminable. De cuando en cuando los pasajeros de atrรกs nos interrumpen para darnos nuevas instrucciones para el camino, y enseguida resumen su charla animosa sobre las prรณximas elecciones.
–Por favor, Teresa, dรฉjame bajar en la prรณxima salida. No quiero ir a la fiesta.
No te pongas melodramรกtica, Raquel, y cรกlmate. En New Jersey no hay mรกs que carreteras para autos y camiones. El servicio pรบblico no funciona por acรก y estamos demasiado lejos de todo para que busques un taxi.
Le paso la botellita de colonia que guardo en la gaveta, con mi cosmรฉtica.
–รchate unas gotas encima. Es muy suave. Te sentirรกs mejor.
Por las dudas, aseguro las puertas y aminoro la marcha. Los de atrรกs viajan apretados, seguramente incรณmodos pero contentos de poder reponerse del largo intervalo sin haberse visto. Ahora discuten la huelga universitaria:
–La harรกn durante la primavera, como siempre, asรญ vale la pena interrumpir las clases y echarse a dormir sobre el cรฉsped.
–Pero tรบ, Ricardo, serรกs el que toca la alarma, y todos saldremos echando la culpa a algรบn estudiante dรญscoloโฆ jajajรกโฆ
Raquel se aguanta el resto del camino sin decir palabra. En cuanto llegamos a la casa de Rita, Raquel se baja del auto y se encierra en el baรฑo. La sigo y al rato llamo a la puerta.
–Dรฉjame en paz, Tere. No me siento bien.
Se demora mรกs de media hora. Por fin sale con los ojos hinchados y demasiado maquillada. No entra el salรณn sino va directo al dormitorio, desde donde llama a un taxi. Se disculpa ante Rita, y le encarga que felicite a Richler y su novia cuando lleguen a su casa. Y a mรญ me previene:
Cuidadito, Tere, con abrir la boca.
Me siento culpable y traicionera, como ella quiere que me sienta,
–ยฟMe perdonas, Raquel? Quiรฉn sabe si Richler te habrรญa atraรญdo todavรญa, despuรฉs de tanto tiempo. Se ve muy ajado, ยฟsabes? Supongo que estos dรญas estarรกs saliendo con gente mucho mรกs joven que รฉl.
Cuanto mรกs hablo, mรกs la empeoro. Mejor me callo. Raquel sabe y yo sรฉ que hubiera sido el shiduj perfecto. Richler se hubiera quedado en Manhattan, su ciudad favorita. Al principio, al menos, Raquel le hubiera celebrado cada una de sus pedanterรญas, lo hubiera llamado desde el aeropuerto tan solo para oรญr su voz, de regreso de una conferenciaโฆ ยกDe haberlo previsto!
A la vuelta de la fiesta llamo a Raquel varias veces. Su mรกquina contestadora repite siempre lo mismo: <<Disculpe, no puedo atenderle en este momento>>. Pero no dice lo que temo oรญr: <<Me estoy cortando las venas; esto metiendo la cabeza en el horno; me estoy tragando el frasco de somnรญferos>>. Cada vez le dejo el mismo mensaje: <<Por favor, Raquel, dame una llamadita para que me quede tranquila>>. La llamo desde Miami, demasiado lejos para ir a verla. Beatriz no estรก en Nueva York y no sรฉ a quiรฉn mรกs recurrir. Consigo el nรบmero del super de su edificio, pero este me dice que si no contesta es que no estรก en casa y se niega a forzar la puerta. Se me ocurre que deberรญa avisar a la policรญa para cerciorarme de que todo estรก en orden.
A la maรฑana siguiente Raquel devuelve mis llamadas.
–Acabo de llegar a casaโฆ Lamento que te hayas preocupado tanto por mรญ. Me fui a casa de Ben, mi novio, por unos dรญas.
–Disculpa, Raquelโฆ, como te habรญa afectado tanto, temรญ queโฆ
–ยกQue me iba a suicidar por una infatuaciรณn tan antigua! ยกQue iba a hacer una escena de pelรญcula! ยกVamos, Tere! ยฟNo comentaste nada en la fiesta, verdad? Dime que no dijiste nada.
–Te lo juro. Nadie se enterรณ. Tuviste una simple jaqueca decimonรณnica. De haberte visto, Richler te hubiera comparado con una heroรญna de Echegaray. ยกAhยก, casi me olvido. Me recordรณ que fuiste una de sus mejores estudiantes; te envรญa un gran abrazo y me pide que le escribas.
–Gracias, pero no, graciasโฆ Y no se toque mรกs el tema. ยฟEstamos?
IF I HAD KNOWN โฆit would have been a perfect shiduch.
In my opinion, and I know about shiduchim. I see a man alone, cultured, refined. And immediately I think of a woman, alone, cultured, refined, with a small vice that she will keep just like he will, discretely hidden. I bring them together; together they converge, they harmonize in their lifestyle. They move in the same environment. Two souls in harmony.
They can insist, if they wish, that they are perfectly satisfied to remain unmarried; but I donโt believe them. We are social animals: male and female we need warmth of our sex and the opposite sex; for me, that officially united as a married couple, they will have more opportunities. Separate, I say, they donโt know what they are missing, her voice from the airport to calm him, letting him know that she is already on the way home; am amusing comment from him, that pleased her, although she had heard it more than once.
Of course, I bring them together without anyone asking them. The shadchenteโs instinct, I say. A Matchmakerโs mania. Sometimes, or course, when I make a mistake, as with Emma and Julio, the perfect couple. The hair capriciously curly hair of both, Emmaโs lighter and silkier; Julioโs mischievous look, that she celebrates at every chance. The two of them fans of classical music, the two are crazy about the movies and taking long walks along the seaside. Who could have guested that they were, in fact, twins separated at birth? That was worthy of a soap opera, Cleopatra, or Caligula. On learning that they had a brother for a husband, they might have named me ambassador for having urged on their marriage. Emma and Julio, on the other hand, feel guilty for having fallen in love, and they reproached me for having facilitated an incestuous love.
Nevertheless, I persevere, although I donโt always hit the mark. The rabbit escapes the best hunter. My last try was such a disaster! When Richler left his wife for another woman, we agreed that, during the first weeks, we would not wear ourselves out with phone calls, but Beatriz would take care of him to alleviate his depression, perhaps his shame, because Richler couldnโt comprehend what had happened to him. Meanwhile, I was preparing for him candidates, for the time when felt recovered. After thirty-five years of marriage, Richler didnโt know how to arrange for them alone. The first year cost him a great deal of physical and mental health: a case of pneumonia left him prostrate for entire weeks. His sister-in-law took care of him in the hospital, and his children, unmarried who lived close to his house, visited him often.
It alarmed us to see him when at the beginning of the next semester, Richler arrived, disheveled and more bent over than ever. Poor Richler. To get him going, Beatriz and I, and his colleagues, plan for him a macrobiotic diet and vigorous walks in the park. We invited him to see a work by Calderรณn de la Barca that he had taught for several years. Although the production was for amateurish, it seemed to him to be very educational. After noting what was left out and the unnecessary pauses by some actors, he took the occasion to eloquently give his opinions about the playwrightโs intentions and the overblown interpretation of the workโs director. Richler left the show excited, so that when we said goodbye at the subway station, he promised to take us to see โIl Travatore.โ Delighted, we agreed.
Although lately Beatriz was more and more occupied with David, a disagreeable boyfriend who dominated her. She didnโt have time for Richler. I spent a couple of months away from New York, so that I had to interrupt my routine of calling him every week. At my return, I found an invitation from Tita, to celebrate Richlerโs retirement, and also, his engagement for Tuesday, October 14. I was shocked.
โWhy so quickly? When did he decide to retire? And with whom is he engaged?โ
โWith a Dominican teacher from Arizona, a friend of his sister-in-law. They will get married in a month, and they will go to live in Phoenix,โ Beatriz explained to me.
For a Jewish gringoโa New Yorkerโsixty-five years old, to marry a Latina, a bit past forty and to move to a state as remote as Arizona had to be and Odyssey. I call Rita, and she explained to me that the dry and temperate climate is ideal for alleviating Richlerโs asthma. The two of us and Beatriz commented on the fact, that while we still felt sorry for Richlerโs miserable state, he had been able to remake his life. By himself. Without our help, he had found his mate. โThen,โ we said to each other, โmission accomplished.โ
For Ritaโs party, I was my turn to be to drive several colleagues in my car. Raquel came too. She sat in the front with me, so that we could chat. We havenโt seen each other for more than fifteen years, when Raquel left high school teaching to take charge of a library in Bronxville. The change is good for her; Raquel has lost weight and appears more sophisticated. She knew that Richler was retiring, but only now, on route to New Jersey, she finds out about the engagement.
โWhat are you saying?โ she whispers to me, incredulous.โ โIsnโt Richler married with two children?โ
โHe was married, but for months, he has been alone. His younger son lives in the university dorms, and the older son got a job in Boston. But how is it you didnโt know, Raquel, that his wife left him, that he caught pneumonia, and that Beatriz and I helped him recover?โ
Raquel hid her face under the lapel of her jacket to hide her reaction. She whispers as if she needed air. She let out a cutoff hiccup. Without a doubt, she wants to ask me more questions, and she doesnโt know where to start. She slowly shakes her head as if she were taking stock of what had happened to her in the interim, while Richler fell in love with the Dominican and decided to take the big step. It hurts me to see Raquel suffer so, and it also disgusts me, But, still, it is too late to change things.
โSimply put, Raquel, I didnโt think of it. Iโm so sorry.โ
What an idiot I was! How could I have forgotten the great love that Raquel had felt for Richler when the two of us studied together at the university? We read each other passionate letters that we write to made-up or real lovers, and we laughed to cover the blushing from acting like silly schoolgirls.
Apparently, Raquelโs love for Richler lasted far too long. In those days, she fantasized raping him; she planned ways to get him away from his wife, to seduce him with her profound knowledge of Calderรณn, and with other strategies that for me became tedious. And Richler, naturally, immersed in his theories and dedicated to his subject, never suspected that Raquel planned to seduce him or that his wife thought of leaving him.
Raquelโs deep and muffled voice reveals all her rancor:
โI canโt pardon you, Tere. How could you not have let me know the instant it happened?!โ And lower yet, she added, โI feel it as a betrayal.โ
โI swear to you with so much going on, I forgot, Raquelita. As Beatriz was the first to help him pass through his crisis. To a degree, I stopped worrying about the situation, do you understand? Of course, if I had remembered, I would have called you, Iโm absolutely sure, but I didnโt remember. Iโm sorry.โ
โDid he have anything going with Beatriz?โ
โAs far as I know, nothing! What a notion youโve come up with, if Beatriz is crazy about David, that boyfriend so conceited that he has her trapped.โ
โWith you either, I supposeโฆโ
โFor Godโs sake, Raquel! I love him like an uncle.โ
The trip to New Jersey is interminable for me. From time to time the passengers in the back interrupted us to give us new directions for the trip, and immediately resume their animated discussion of the coming elections.
โPlease, Teresa, please let me get out at the next exit. I donโt want to go to the party.โ
โDonโt be melodramatic, Raquel, and calm down. In New Jersey, there are only highways for cars and trucks. Rapid transit doesnโt function here, and we are too far from anything for you to try to get a taxi.โ
I passed to her a little bottle of cologne that I keep in the drawer, with my cosmetics.
โThrow on a few drops. Itโs very soft. Youโll feel better.โ
Just in case, I lock the doors and slow down. Those in the back, travel cramped, surely uncomfortable, but content to catch up after the long interval without seeing each other. Now, they discuss the university strike.
โThey will do it in Spring, as always, so itโs worth the trouble to interrupt classes and go to sleep on the grass.โ
โBut you, Ricardo, you will be the one to hit the alarm, and we will all go out and blame some unruly studentโฆha, ha, haโฆ
Raquel endured the rest of the trip without saying anything. As soon as we arrive at Ritaโs house, Raquel gets out of the car and shuts herself into the bathroom. I follow her and after a while, knock on the door.
โLeave me in peace, Tere, I donโt feel well.โ
She delays for more than a half hour. Finally, she leaves with her eyes swollen and too much makeup. She doesnโt enter the living room, but goes directly to the bedroom, from where, she calls a taxi. She apologizes to Rita, and charges her with congratulating Richler and his fiancรฉe when they arrive at her house.
โBe careful, Tere, about opening your mouth.โ
I feel guilty and treacherous, just as she wants me to feel.
โDo you pardon me, Raquel? Who knows if you would have found Richler attractive, still, after so much time. He looks very old. Who knows? I suppose that these days youโre going out with people much younger than he.โ
The more I speak, the more I make things worse. Itโs better if I keep quiet. Raquel knows and I know that it would have been a perfect shiduch. Richler would have remained in Manhattan, his favorite city. At first, at least, Raquel would have celebrated every one of his pedantries, she would have called him from the airport only to hear his voice, on the way back from a conferenceโฆ To have foreseen it!
Returning from the party, I call Raquel several times.
Her answering machine always repeats the same thingโ โIโm sorry, I canโt speak to you right now.โ But it doesnโt say what I fear to hear: โIโm cutting my veins: Iโm putting my head in the oven; I am swallowing a vial of sleeping pills.โ Each time, I leave her the same message: โPlease, Raquelita, give me a little call so that I wonโt worry. I call her from Miami, too far away to go to see her. Beatriz is not in New York, and I donโt know who else to turn to. I obtain the number of the super of her building, but he tells me that if she doesnโt answer, itโs because sheโs not home, and he refuses to force the door. I occurs to me that I should contact the police to assure myself that everything is in order.
The next morning, Raquel returned my calls.
โI just got home… Iโm sorry that you have been so worried about me. I went to Ben, my boyfriendโs house for a few days,
โI apologize, Raquelโฆ, since it had affected you so, I feared thatโฆโ
โThat I was going to commit suicide for such an old infatuation. That I was going to create a scene from a movie! Come on, Tere! You didnโt say anything at the party, right? Tell me that you didnโt say anything.โ
โI swear to you. Nobody found out. You had a simple old-fashioned migraine. If he had seen you, Richler would have compared you to a Echegaray heroine. Ah, I almost forgot. He reminded me that you were one of his best students; he sends you a big hug, and he asks me to have you write him.โ
โThanks, but no thanksโฆ and letโs not mention this topic again. Agreed?โ
Bernardo Jobson (Vera, provincia de Santa Fe, 1928-Buenos Aires, 1986) fue periodista en los diarios La Opiniรณn y Tiempo Argentino entre otros, traductor y redactor publicitario. Escribiรณ los libros Memorias de un soldado raso y Veinticinco watts, aunque los originales se extraviaron, por lo que estos se consideran irrecuperables; lo mismo sucediรณ con El carnet de Dios, el guiรณn de una de sus obras de teatro inรฉditas, y la recopilaciรณn de notas humorรญsticas Diccionario enciclopรฉdico argentino. Fue miembro de las revistas El Escarabajo de Oro y El Ornitorrinco. El fideo mรกs largo del mundo (Buenos Aires, 1972) es su รบnico libro publicado.
Bernardo Jobson (Vera, Santa Fe province, 1928-Buenos Aires, 1986) was a journalist for the newspapers La Opiniรณn and Tiempo Argentino, among others, as well as a translator and advertising editor. He wrote the books Memoirs of a Private and Twenty-five Watts, although the originals were lost, so they are considered unrecoverable; The same happened with El carnet de Dios, the script for one of his unpublished plays, and the compilation of humorous notes Argentine Encyclopedic Dictionary. He was a member of the magazines El Escarabajo de Oro and El Ornitorrinco. El fideo mรกs largo del mundo (Buenos Aires, 1972) is his only published book.
__________________________________________
From: El fideo mรกs largo del mundo. Buenos Aires: Capital Intelectual, 2008
“Te recuerdo como eras en el รบltimo otoรฑo”
El problema es que el jefe no me lo va a creer. Le he hecho tragar ya tantas milanesas, tantas albรณndigas super-condimentadas, que esto no me lo va a creer. Pienso en alguna excusa potable, pero me da un poco de bronca: ยฟuna vez que tengo una razรณn valedera para ausentarme de la oficina, voy a tener que apelar a una mentira? ยฟTan mal anda el mundo? me pregunto. Pero toda esta filosofรญa de apuro no me absuelve del dolor que tengo desde que me levantรฉ y amenaza con la posibilidad de que la gente me crea un deforme o algo asรญ, al margen de unos chillidos austeros pero evidentes que me transformaron en la mรกxima atracciรณn del dรญa en el subte. En ese momento vuelvo a sentarme y siento como si una tachuela me hubiese penetrado hasta la garganta. Por supuesto, las tachuelas se supone que lo pinchan a uno en el culo y รฉsta es una tachuela de lo mรกs ortodoxa. No me puedo sentar, no me puedo quedar parado, no puedo quedarme un minuto mรกs en ninguna posiciรณn. Y te guste o no, jefecito, allรก voy. Con la verdad no temo ni ofendo y me paro frente al escritorio del salmรณnido.
โPlata no hay โme atajaโ. Y si necesitรกs plata porque se te muriรณ algรบn pariente, antes me traรฉs el certificado de defunciรณn. Mira, ni siquiera con el certificado. รnicamente contra presentaciรณn del cadรกver.
โJefe, no quiero plataโฆ โpor ahora, porque en ese momento pienso que en una de รฉsas voy a tener que comprar un remedio y ante Duraciรณn 23โ04โโ presentaciรณn de receta no me va a decir que no. Mirรก vos, me digo, ยฟcรณmo no se me ocurriรณ antes este yeite?
โNi ahora ni nunca, ni siquiera a fin de mes. ยฟSabรฉs que sos el รบnico en la historia de esta empresa que cobra por adelantado? Ya tenรฉs un mes de sueldo en vales.
โJefe, perdรณneme, pero no estoy de humor hoy. Todo lo que quiero es permiso para ir al hospital. Hay que ver el conflicto que esto le produce. ยฟQuiรฉn serรก: un pariente, un amigo, algรบn amor lejano? Pero reacciona a tiempo.
โSangre diste la semana pasada. Te fuiste a las 9 y no apareciste en todo el dรญa.
โJefe, usted se equivoca por el fรญsico con que me ha dotado la naturaleza. Que yo mida 1,95 m y pese 102 kilos, no quiere decir que si me sacan medio litro del vital elemento, no quede medio dopado.
โBueno, no sรฉ, pero parientes vivos ya no te quedan, segรบn me consta. ยฟQuiรฉn es el moribundo hoy?
โNadie. Soy yo el que quiere ir al hospital, ahora mismo.
โยฟQuรฉ te pasa? โpregunta enojรกndose consigo mismo porque ya estรก entrando por la variante. Conflictos internos. ยฟY el que yo tengo ahora? ยฟCรณmo le digo la verdad, la cruda verdad?
โJefe, no me lo va a creer. No me lo va creer. No sรฉ quรฉ cara pongo, pero sรญ la que pone รฉl. Se asusta. ยกCorazรณn, hรญgado, pulmรณn! Al mismo tiempo, busca el tรฉrmino รฉse, difรญcil, que cuanto mejor lo dice mรกs gente piensa quรฉ gran mรฉdico se perdiรณ la sociedad.
โยฟAlgรบn trastorno cardiovascular?
Niego con la cabeza.
โยฟVisceral? Tampoco. Como ya estรก a punto de agotar su diagnรณstico precoz, apela a lo increรญble, a lo que no puede ser, ยกen esta รฉpoca!
โMe imagino que no tendrรก nada que ver con el sistema gรฉnitourinario, ยฟno?
โY, mรกs o menos โle contestoโ. Tengo un grano en el culo. Diez minutos despuรฉs estoy parado en el hall del hospital, mirando la guรญa de consultorios externos. Parezco un tailandรฉs reciรฉn llegado, buscando la temperatura media de Jujuy en la guรญa de telรฉfonos. No sรฉ quiรฉn me toca a mรญ: ยฟenfermedades secretas, culologรญa, anologรญa? No figura ninguna, y a esa enfermera de la mesa de entradas no se lo pienso preguntar. Si fuera vieja y buena, todavรญa, pero no tiene mรกs de 25 y hay que ver lo bien que estรก. El portero o algo asรญ acude en mi ayuda. Y como todos los porteros tienen obligaciรณn de ser mรฉdicos frustrados, cancheros viejos, empรญricos de la medicina que lo ven a uno y ya saben lo que uno tiene, me pregunta:
โยฟAlgรบn problema, seรฑor? ยฟBusca a alguien?
โSรญ, la verdad que sรญ. Pero no sรฉ exactamente a quiรฉn. Juro que mi respuesta es totalmente natural, pero รฉl ya sospecha algo turbio.
โยฟAlguno de los doctores?
โSรญ, pero no sรฉ cuรกl puede serโฆ Los puntos suspensivos son benรฉvolamente acogidos por el portero y los estudia unos segundos.
โยฟAlgรบn problemaโฆ? โy la definiciรณn mรฉdica del problema la explica con la mano y apoyรกndose en una sonrisa comprensiva y paternalโ.
–Me parece que usted busca dermatologรญa. Primer piso, consultorio 23. Dรญgale al doctor que lo mando yo.
โยฟPerdรณn, dermatologรญa? Yโฆ ยฟquรฉ atienden allรญ? Quiero decir, si uno tieneโฆ
โEh, por favor โme asegura canchero al extremoโ. Yo tambiรฉn tuve que ir cuando era jovenโฆโy luego de asegurarse de que nadie pueda verlo, agrega: โ Tres veces. Claro, eran otros tiempos, ยฟno?
โY sรญ, no va a comparar โle ratifico, mientras pienso que dermatologรญa no puede ser. Que la pared del culo me duele, no hay duda, pero no le veo relaciรณn. Encima, me duele cada vez mรกs y antes de tener que relatar, por segunda vez, la cruda verdad, me tiro un lance y le digo:
โCreo que es ortopedia. Como a cualquier personaje orillero, lo tumba el asombro.
โยฟOrtopedia? Pero si usted camina lo mรกs bien. โNo vaya a creer. Hay momentos en que no puedo. Estรก totalmente decepcionado. Todo un caso social que รฉl creรญa tener como primicia absoluta se le va diluyendo.
โOrtopedia โle insistoโ: ยฟNo quiere decir que a uno lo curan delโฆ?
โDรญgame, seรฑor โme pregunta ya totalmente ofendidoโ ยฟA usted quรฉ le duele? โBueno, para serle franco, me duele el culo, ยฟquรฉ quiere que le haga? No tiene ninguna anรฉcdota al respecto y no sรฉ si me la contarรญa aรบn en el caso contrario. Ya me odia, directamente.
โVaya a la guardia. Ahรญ lo van a atender. Parece mentira. Cuando me dispongo a irme, la vocaciรณn lo traiciona y me dice: โTรณmese un Geniol. O dos. Le agradezco la receta magistral y enfilo para la guardia. El continente americano se ha enfermado hoy y me pongo en la cola.
Delante mรญo hay un tipo justo para que lo atienda el portero. La dimensiรณn de la fila me hace dudar sobre si llegarรฉ vivo a que me atiendan, pero pienso que esto me da el tiempo suficiente para ver quรฉ le digo a la mina que estรก sentada en un escritorio y distribuyendo el juego como un hรกbil mediocampista: usted allรญ, usted acรก, hoy estรก prohibido enfermarse del hรญgado, el reumatรณlogo tiene hepatitis. Pienso en lo que voy a decirle: โMe duele el recto (y todo el mundo pensando quรฉ lรกstima, un muchacho con ese fรญsico y maricรณn).
โQuiero que me revisen el recto (y la misma conclusiรณn, ahora ya sin ninguna duda sobre mi desviaciรณn sexual).
โBusco al rectรณlogo (y lo mismo, รฉste quiere disimular que es maricรณn, lo cual no deja de ser peor. Por lo menos, que afronte su desgracia con altivez, caramba). Cuando faltan dos tipos, no sรฉ todavรญa quรฉ voy a decirle, pero el punto que estรก delante mรญo me puede salvar. A ver cรณmo le explica รฉl que tiene los bichitos juguetones y entonces yo aprovecho la bolada, el ambiente turbio ya que tiene antecedente y lo mรญo no trasciende. Cuando le llega el turno, la enfermera le pregunta nombre, apellido, edad, domicilio y por poco hincha de quiรฉn. Con soberbia cara de otario, me acerco para escuchar el crucial diรกlogo.
โยฟQuรฉ problema tiene? A punto de caรฉrsele la cara de vergรผenza por lo frรกgil ser humano que es, responde:
โTengo una uรฑa encarnada. Pienso en la famosa clรญnica del diagnรณstico que podrรญamos fundar el portero y yo y luego de dar mi filiaciรณn, me mira y me pregunta con la mirada, quรฉ problema tengo. Yo, mudo. Finalmente, accede al ritual.
โยฟQuรฉ problema tiene, seรฑor?
โBueno, tengo un dolor. Apoya la cabeza en la palma y me vuelve a mirar. Estรก esperando que yo le diga dรณnde.
โยฟSรญ? โme pregunta dejando en el aire: quรฉ me dice.
โSรญ โle contesto. El agitadรญsimo diรกlogo no deja de constituir una escena pintoresca que matiza la espera de todos los pacientes. Todos miran. Detrรกs mรญo, no hay nadie. Esto puede durar todo el dรญa, pienso. Ayรบdame, miss Nightingale. Vos sabรฉs de estas cosas.
โยฟDolores durante la micciรณn? โme pregunta sutilmente. Dolores durante la micciรณn. Parece el nombre de una mina de la sociedad colombiana, pienso.
โNo โle contesto. Y con un gesto le indico que siga intentando.
โยฟDolores gรฉnito-urinarios? โme pregunta un poco enojada, y antes de que se le ocurra la prรณxima posibilidad dolorosa, un sifilรณlogo frustrado opina en voz baja para que lo oigan todos: โDebe ser para dermatologรญa, seรฑorita.
โSeรฑor, por favor, no podemos estar todo el dรญa con esto. Si usted no me dice lo que le pasaโฆ
–ยฟProblemas gรฉnito-urinarios? โinsiste. โSeรฑorita โle digo con tono lastimeroโ. No son gรฉnito-urinarios, peroโฆ alguna relaciรณn tiene, no sรฉ. El recto, ยฟtiene algo que ver con el sistema? Claro, la palabra era un cheque al portador. La noticia recorre todo el hospital, pero el epicentro del fenรณmeno se centra en la guardia. El tipo de la uรฑa encarnada me mira diciรฉndome con los ojos no te da vergรผenza, si yo fuera tu padre, te volvรญa a romper el culo, pero a patadas, y una madre le dice a su hijo, vos venรญ para acรก y lo protege instintivamente del deleznable sujeto. La enfermera, repuesta de la noticia, anota en la planilla y me dice que me siente. Pienso que si me siento, muero, ahรญ nomรกs, sumariamente. El mรฉdico pasa por allรญ en ese momento, y la enfermera lo detiene.
Noto que habla de mรญ, el tipo me mira, le dice que sรญ, enseguida vuelvo y sale. Como, pese a todo, ella me ama, me informa que enseguida me van a atender. La decisiรณn provoca la tradicional reacciรณn popular, hay murmullos contra la aborrecible enfermera, pero en medio de la indignaciรณn general, surge la voz de la madre del niรฑo que dirigiรฉndose a nadie, es decir, a todos, dice:
โClaro, y encima los atienden primero.
La configuraciรณn edilicia de la guardia propiamente dicha es un monumento a la discreciรณn. Con un grabador y una filmadora uno podrรญa, en diez minutos, escribir los diez tomos del Testut. El mรฉdico me pregunta quรฉ me pasa. Debe tener 22 aรฑos a lo sumo. ยฟEn quรฉ aรฑo estarรกs? ยฟYa rendiste Culo vos?, me pregunto.
โMire โle explicoโ. Desde ayer tengo un dolor bรกrbaro en el ano. Y ahora ya no puedo mรกs. No puedo sentarme, no puedo estar parado, me duele si hablo.
โBueno, vamos a ver. Venga por aquรญ. Y a medida que recorremos el pasillo, va descorriendo las cortinas de los boxes, no sin provocar frecuentes chillidos, indignados por favores y actitudes insensatas de quienes se ven sorprendidos con paรฑos menores a media asta. Encontramos uno vacรญo y me ordena que me desnude mientras รฉl enseguida vuelve. En el box de al lado, el de la uรฑa encarnada pega un grito y se traga una puteada que hubiera involucrado hasta el mรกs remoto antecesor de la enfermera. Pienso que la verdad esto es mejor tomรกrselo a joda y cagarse de risa. A la sola menciรณn del verbo defectivo, reflejo condicionado dirรญa Pavlov, me entran ganas de ir al baรฑo, vรญa recto. Lo รบnico que faltaba, me digo, que me agarren ganas de cagar. El grito del de la uรฑa encarnada va a parecer un susurro de amor comparado con el mรญo. Frรกgil espiritual que es uno trato de engaรฑarme y me digo que ya caguรฉ. Mentira, me grita mi conciencia, mientras pienso que algรบn dรญa debo escribir un ensayo sobre la vida y la caca: dos cosas difรญciles de aguantar.
La temperatura ambiente no es la mรกs propicia para quedarse totalmente en pelotas, y me dejo puesta la camisa y los zapatos. Me siento en la camilla y me observo el sistema gรฉnito-urinario que dirรญa el portero. Da lรกstima: parece el experimento de un jรญbaro que ha reducido un bandoneรณn. Cuando el de la uรฑa encarnada opina que prefiere que le corten el pie antes de que se atrevan a tocarle la uรฑa otra vez, entra el futuro mรฉdico, orgullo de la familia.
โPรณngase en cuclillas โme ordena.
Me pongo en cuclillas y pienso que lo รบnico que falta es que suene un disparo y salga a buscar la meta.
โAbra un poco mรกs las nalgas. Las abro.
โUn poco mรกs โinsiste.
โDoctor, no crea que no quiero colaborar con la ciencia, pero mido 1,95. El tipo se rรญe y me dice que estรก bien.
Para distraerme un poco, bajo la cabeza y miro hacia atrรกs. Me pregunto cรณmo no larga todo y se manda mudar. El espectรกculo es deplorable, pero siento dos manos frรญas en ambos glรบteos y dos pulgares acercรกndose sugestivamente por ambos flancos. Instintivamente, me hago el estrecho.
โNo, por favor, quรฉdese tranquilo. Asรญ no puedo hacer nada.
Le pido perdรณn y rindo la ciudadela. Los pulgares se asumen y se acercan a las puertas de palacio ya. Vos tรณcame nomรกs, tรณcame apenas y que Dios te ampare, pienso. Ostensiblemente acuciadas por la posiciรณn decรบbito panzal, las ganas de ir al baรฑo se acentรบan y ahora sรญ, me niego rotundamente.
El tipo se me enoja y como ya ha entrado en confianza โdespuรฉs de todo me ha tocado el culoโ me dice che, dรฉjese de embromar, parece mentira. De golpe sospecha algo y me pregunta:
โยฟQuรฉ le pasa? โDoctor, perdรณneme, ยฟpero usted quiere creer que justo ahora? Se agarra la cabeza y vuelve a reรญr.
โEstรก bien, pero aguรกntese. No hay otra soluciรณn. Yo necesito solo unos segundos para palparlo.
Tengo ganas de contestarle que yo tambiรฉn, pero para cagarme. No creo que el chiste le caiga bien.
Como soy un gil, me pregunta cosas a medida que empieza otra vez la invasiรณn.
โยฟEs la primera vez que le pasa?
โY la รบltima. Aunque tenga que cagar por la oreja el resto de mi vida. En ese momento, siento un alambre de pรบa recorriendo con libre albedrรญo las paredes iniciales del recto. Y pienso lo que debe estar gozando el de la uรฑa encarnada. Pego un grito.
โQuรฉdese como estรก โme ordenaโ. Relaje los mรบsculos. Enseguida vuelvo. Escucho que en el pasillo le pregunta a la enfermera dรณnde hay vaselina. La mera menciรณn del noble lubricante para usos o aberraciones varias me incita a salir corriendo despavorido, cuando escucho que la cortinita se corre y entra alguien, doctora ella, pasea la mirada por los hermosos y lascivos glรบteos, luego va hacia el sistema gรฉnito urinario propiamente dicho, me mira inquisitivamente, se echa hacia atrรกs y vuelve a investigar la decoraciรณn en general, tuerce la cabeza convencida de que no hay nada que hacer, todo serรญa inรบtil, pide perdรณn y sale. En cualquier momento deciden dejarme acรก toda la maรฑana y cobran entrada, pienso. Se vuelve a correr la cortinita y entra mi anรณlogo de cabecera con un frasco de vaselina como para revisar un mamut. Lo deja sobre una mesita y procede a colocarse unos guantes de goma.
โยฟEs para evitar el embarazo? โle digo haciรฉndome el gracioso. No me contesta porque los guantes son mรกs viejos que el tobillo y no sabe por dรณnde empezar. Cuando logra ponรฉrselos, le asoman dos dedos, lรกnguidos y desnudos.
โUn momentito โme ruega.
โDoctor โlo paroโ ยฟtengo que quedarme asรญ obligatoriamente? Me duelen los brazos, sin contar con que cualquiera puede entrar como reciรฉn. El show, francamente, es un asco.
โNo, quรฉdese asรญ. Y abra las nalgas todo lo que pueda. Sale y enseguida vuelve, esta vez acompaรฑado de un colega, futuro anรณlogo.
โยฟFรญstula? โNo sรฉ. Todavรญa no pude palpar.
โยฟDolor?
โSรญ.
โNo se ve inflamaciรณn โdice el reciรฉn llegado desde la frontera con Bolivia.
โยฟQuรฉ te parece?
โNo sรฉ. Palpรก a ver quรฉ pasa. Yo Ano cinco todavรญa no di.
El colega desaparece. De pronto, la situaciรณn se hace tensa. Me vuelve a abrir sin mรกs trรกmite, se acerca todo lo que puede y, jugado, decide auscultar de zurda. Le miro el tamaรฑo del dedo, manos de pianista mรกs bien no tiene.
โEscรบcheme bien. Ahora va en serio. O se deja palpar o se va a su mรฉdico.
โMe dejo palpar. Cuando las galaxias explotaron en el nรบcleo central del universo, todo fue, durante un instante, un rojo que nunca se volverรก a repetir, una explosiรณn desde el seno mรกs รญntimo de cada una de las estrellas que se expandieron junto con nuestro sol por el espacio buscando con sus puntas el borde pascaliano de la esfera cรณsmica, horadando el infinito como espadas de Dios, mientras el sol, vagabundo desde la eternidad, buscaba exactamente el centro de su pequeรฑo sistema, calcinando todo lo que encontraba a su paso en una carrera devastadora que separรณ continentes, desequilibrรณ el eje de rotaciรณn de los astros, emergieron volcanes que durante millones de siglos se aburrieron en las entraรฑas de la tierra y estallaron al fin como bestias, una estampida de bรบfalos inconmensurables vomitando el rojo inicial, hasta que Dios dijo basta, paremos aquรญ si lo que queremos es crear un planeta.
Salgo del quirรณfano ad hoc, horadado y profanado en lo mรกs รญntimo, con la orden de volver maรฑana para ser observado por el especialista en el asunto, sujeto que me aplicarรก un aparato que se llamarรก todo lo rectoscopio que quiera, pero que no deja de ser un fierro en el culo. En ese momento, el tipo de la uรฑa encarnada, apoyรกndose lastimosamente en uno de los talones, va tambiรฉn hacia la salida. Todavรญa no he podido saber por quรฉ, le sonrรญo diciรฉndole quรฉ dรญa, ยฟno?, al tiempo que camino con un ritmo que ya lo quisiera Marรญa Fรฉlix yendo al encuentro de su amante para matarlo con premeditaciรณn y alevosรญa.
Sorpresivamente, siento una de las famosas puntadas y me agarro del desuรฑado para no caerme, gesto civil y sin implicancias que el tipo interpreta como amor a primera vista, se me vuelve a escapar otra sonrisa, actitud que no deja de empeorar las cosas y el tipo โmufa, impotencia, dolor y asco medianteโ levanta instintivamente el pie desuรฑado y Bernabรฉ Ferreyra en su tarde mรกs gloriosa me encaja una patada en el centro mismo del culo. Por un instante nos miramos, sorprendidos.
Un segundo despuรฉs, los dos, al unรญsono, pegamos el grito inicial, el llamado de amor indio, Tarzรกn navegando de liana en liana y convocando a todo el continente africano con voz tomada por un intempestivo resfrรญo e inmediatamente damos comienzo oficial al primer festival mundial de cante jondo, no sin matizarlo con pasos de baile calรฉ, y danza rabiosamente moderna, todo por bulerรญas.
De: El fideo mรกs largo del mundo, Capital Intelectual, 2008
The problem is that the boss is not going to believe me, I have already made him swallow so many schnitzels, so many super-spiced meat balls, that he is not going to believe this on. I think about an acceptable excuse, but it makes me a bit angry. For once, I have a worthwhile excuse for to be out of the office. Am I going to have to resort to a lie? Is the world in that bad shape? I wonder.
But all this hurried philosophy doesnโt absolve me from the pain that I have had since I woke up and the threat that people consider me deformed or something like that, on the edge of some austere but evident squeeling that transformed me into the greatest attraction on the subway. At that moment I sit down again, and I feel as if a tack had penetrated me as far as my throat. Of course, tacks suppose that they stab you in the ass, and this is a thumbtack of the most orthodox style. I canโt remain standing another minute in any position.
And like it or no, my dear boss, here I come. With the truth on my side, I donโt fear or offend, and I stop in front of the desk of the big fish.
โThereโs no more money,โ he stopped me. โAnd if you need money because some relative or another died, donโt even bring me the death certificate; only when I want to see the cadaver.
โBoss, I donโt need moneyโฆ nor right now, because when the time comes, I will have to buy a remedy, and with the prescription for โDuration 23-4, you wonโt be able to say no. Look, I say to myself, how come I didnโt think of that trick earlier.
โNot now, not ever, not even at the end of the month. Do you know that you are the only one in the history of this firm who gets his money in advance?โ
โBoss, pardon me, but Iโm not on a good mood today. All I want is permission to go to the hospital. You must understand what a problem this causes. Who might it be: a relative, a friend, a former lover? But ask fast.
โLast week, you gave blood. You left at 9, and you didnโt reappear for the rest of the day.โ
โBoss, you are mistaken about the body that nature gave me. That I measure 1, 95
and weigh 102 kilos, doesnโt mean that if they tale half a liter of the element of life, I donโt come out half doped.โ
โOkay, I donโt know but you no longer have any living relatives, as I understand. Who is the dying one today?โ
โNobody, I am the one who needs to go to the hospital, right now.โ Internal conflicts. And what do I have now? How can I tell you the truth, the crude truth?
โBoss, you are not going to believe me. I donโt know which face to put on it, but I do I but I do know what it does. Shocking. Heart, liver, lung! At the same time, Iโm looking for the right term, difficult, that the better itโs said, people think that the great doctor finished off society.
โAny cardiovascular disorder?
I shake my head.
-Visceral? Neither. As he is about to exhaust his early diagnosis, he appeals to the incredible, to what cannot be, at this time!
โI imagine it has nothing to do with the genitourinary system, right?
โAnd, more or less โI answerโ. I have a pain in my ass. Ten minutes later I am standing in the hospital hall, looking at the outpatient clinic directory. I look like a recently arrived Thai, looking for the average temperature of Jujuy in the phone book. I do not know who touches me: me toca a mรญ: secret diseases, culology, anology? There isn’t one listed, and I’m not going to ask that nurse at the admissions desk. If she were old and good, still, but she is not more than 25 and you have to see how good she is. The doorman or something like that comes to my aid. And since all the doormen have to be frustrated doctors, old cancheros, medical experts who see you and already know what you have, he asks me:
โAny problem, sir? Look for someone?
-Yes, indeed. But I don’t know exactly who. I swear my answer is totally natural, but he already suspects something shady.
โAny of the doctors?
โYes, but I don’t know what it could be… The ellipsis is benevolently welcomed by the doorman and he studies them for a few seconds.
-Any problemโฆ? โand the medical definition of the problem is explained with his hand and supported by an understanding and paternal smileโ.
–It seems to me that you are looking for dermatology. First floor, office 23. Tell the doctor I sent him.
โExcuse me, dermatology? And… what do they serve there? I mean, if one has…
โHey, please,โ Canchero assures me to the extreme. I also had to go when I was youngโฆ โ and after making sure that no one can see it, he adds: โ Three times. Of course, those were different times, right?
โAnd yes, it is not going to compare โI confirm, while I think that dermatology cannot be. That the wall of my ass hurts, there is no doubt, but I don’t see any connection. On top of that, it hurts me more and more and before I have to tell the harsh truth for the second time, I take a chance and tell him:
โI think it’s orthopedics. Like any coastal character, he is struck down by astonishment.
-Orthopedics? But if you walk the best. โDon’t believe it. There are times when I can’t. He is totally disappointed. An entire social case that he thought he had as an absolute first is being diluted.
โOrthopedics โI insistโ: Doesn’t that mean that one is cured ofโฆ?
“Tell me, sir,” he asks me, now totally offended, “what hurts you?” โWell, to be honest, my ass hurts, what do you want me to do to it? He doesn’t have any anecdotes about it and I don’t know if he would tell me even if he didn’t. He already hates me, directly.
โGo to the guard. They will attend to him there. It seems like a lie. When I’m about to leave, his vocation betrays him and he tells me: -Take a Geniol. Or two. I thank you for the masterful recipe and I head for the guard. The American continent got sick today and I’m getting in line.
In front of me there is a guy just right for the doorman to attend to. The size of the line makes me doubt whether I will arrive alive to be treated, but I think this gives me time enough to see what I say to the girl who is sitting at a desk and distributing the game like a skilled midfielder: you there, you here, today it is forbidden to get liver disease, the rheumatologist has hepatitis. I think about what I’m going to say to him: โMy rectum hurts (and everyone thinking what a shame, a boy with that physique and a faggot).
โI want them to check my rectum (and the same conclusion, now without any doubt about my sexual deviation).
โI’m looking for the rectologist (and the same thing, he wants to hide that he’s a faggot, which is worse. At least, let him face his misfortune with haughtiness, geez). When two guys are missing, I still don’t know what I’m going to say to him, but the point in front of me can save me. Let’s see how he explains that he has playful little bugs and then I take advantage of the nonsense, the murky atmosphere since it has a history and mine does not transcend. When her turn comes, the nurse asks her name, surname, age, address and almost who she is a fan of. With the proud face of an otario, I approach to listen to the crucial dialogue.
โWhat problem do you have? On the verge of losing his face with shame at what a fragile human being he is, he responds:
โI have an ingrown toenail. I think about the famous diagnostic clinic that the doorman and I could found and after giving my affiliation, he looks at me and asks me with his eyes, what problem I have. I, dumb. Finally, agree to the ritual.
โWhat problem do you have, sir?
โWell, I have a pain. He rests his head on his palm and looks at me again. He’s waiting for me to tell him where.
-Yeah? โhe asks me, leaving it hanging in the air: what are you saying to me?
โYes โI answer. The very hectic dialogue still constitutes a picturesque scene that qualifies the wait of all the patients. Everyone looks. Behind me, there is no one. This could last all day, I think. Help me, Miss Nightingale. You know about these things.
โPain during urination? โI ask myself subtly. Pain during urination. It seems like the name of a mine in Colombian society, I think.
-I do not answer. And with a gesture he tells him to keep trying.
โGenito-urinary pain? โshe asks me a little angrily, and before the next painful possibility occurs to her, a frustrated syphilologist gives his opinion in a low voice so that everyone can hear: โIt must be for dermatology, miss.
โSir, please, we can’t spend all day with this. If you don’t tell me what’s wrong…
–Genito-urinary problems? – she insists. โMiss,โ I say in a pitiful tone. “They are not genito-urinary, but… there is some relationship, I don’t know. Does the rectum have anything to do with the system? Of course, the word was a bearer check. The news spread throughout the hospital, but the epicenter of the phenomenon is centered on the guard. The guy with the ingrown toenail looks at me telling me with his eyes, you’re not ashamed, if I were your father, I’d beat your ass back, but with kicks, and a mother tells her son, come here and protect him instinctively despicable subject. The nurse, informed of the news, makes a note on the form and tells me to sit down. I think that if I sit down, I die, right there, summarily. The doctor passes by at that moment, and the nurse stops him.
I notice that he is talking about me, the guy looks at me, says yes, I immediately come back, and he leaves. Since, despite everything, she loves me, she informs me that they will take care of me right away. The decision provokes the traditional popular reaction, there are murmurs against the hateful nurse, but in the midst of the general indignation, the voice of the child’s mother emerges and, addressing no one, that is, everyone, says:
โOf course, and on top of that they serve them first.
The building configuration of the guard itself is a monument to discretion. With a tape recorder and a video recorder one could, in ten minutes, write the ten volumes of the Testut. The doctor asks me what’s wrong. Must be 22 years old at most. What year will you be in? Have you already given up your ass? I wonder.
โLook โI explainโ. Since yesterday I have had tremendous pain in my anus. And now I can’t take it anymore. I can’t sit, I can’t stand, it hurts if I talk.
-Well let’s see. Come here. And as we walk down the hallway, he draws back the curtains of the boxes, not without causing frequent squeals, outraged by the favors and senseless attitudes of those who are surprised with lower cloths at half-mast. We find an empty one and he orders me to undress while he immediately returns. In the next box, the one with the ingrown toenail screams and swallows a bullshit that would have involved even the nurse’s most remote ancestor. I think the truth is it’s better to take it lightly and laugh your ass off. At the mere mention of the defective verb, a conditioned reflex, Pavlov would say, I feel like going to the bathroom, straight ahead. The only thing missing, I tell myself, was to make me want to shit. The cry of the one with the ingrown toenail is going to seem like a whisper of love compared to mine. Fragile spiritual person that he is, I try to deceive myself and tell myself that I already screwed up. Lie, my conscience screams at me, as I think that one day I must write an essay about life and poop: two things that are difficult to endure.
The ambient temperature is not the most conducive to staying completely naked, and I leave my shirt and shoes on. I sit on the stretcher and observe the genito-urinary system as the porter would say. It’s a shame: it seems like the experiment of a jรญbaro who has reduced a bandoneรณn. When the one with the ingrown toenail thinks that he prefers to have his foot cut off before anyone dares to touch his toenail again, the future doctor, the pride of the family, enters.
“Squat down,” he orders me.
I squat down and think that the only thing left is for a shot to ring out and go out to find the goal.
โOpen your buttocks a little more. I open them.
โA little more โhe insists.
โDoctor, don’t think that I don’t want to collaborate with science, but I’m 1.95 tall. The guy laughs and tells me it’s okay.
To distract myself a little, I lower my head and look back. I wonder how he doesn’t just leave everything and order a move. The spectacle is deplorable, but I feel two cold hands on both buttocks and two thumbs approaching suggestively from both sides. Instinctively, I play dumb.
โNo, please, stay calm. So I can’t do anything.
I ask your forgiveness and surrender the citadel. The thumbs are assumed and they approach the palace doors now. Just touch me, just touch me and may God protect you, I think. Ostensibly urged by the prone position, the urge to go to the bathroom is accentuated and now, I flatly refuse.
The guy gets angry at me and since he has already gained confidence – after all he has touched my ass – he tells me hey, stop joking, it seems like a lie. Suddenly he suspects something and asks me:
-What happens? โDoctor, forgive me, but do you want to believe that right now? He grabs his head and laughs again.
โListen to me well. Now it’s serious. Either let yourself be palpated or go to your doctor.
โI let myself be felt. When the galaxies exploded in the central core of the universe, everything was, for an instant, a red that will never be repeated, an explosion from the most intimate core of each of the stars that expanded together with our sun through space. searching with its points for the Pascalian edge of the cosmic sphere, piercing the infinity like swords of God, while the sun, wandering since eternity, sought exactly the center of its small system, burning everything in its path in a devastating race. that separated continents, unbalanced the axis of rotation of the stars, volcanoes emerged that for millions of centuries were bored in the bowels of the earth and finally exploded like beasts, a stampede of immeasurable buffaloes vomiting the initial red, until God said enough , let’s stop here if what we want is to create a planet.
I leave the ad hoc operating room, pierced and desecrated in my most intimate part, with the order to return tomorrow to be observed by the specialist in the matter, a subject who will apply a device to me that will be called whatever rectoscope you want, but which does not stop be an iron in the ass. At that moment, the guy with the ingrown toenail, resting pitifully on one of his heels, also goes towards the exit. I still haven’t been able to figure out why, I smile at him telling him what a day, right?, at the same time that I walk with a rhythm that Marรญa Fรฉlix would want, going to meet her lover to kill him with premeditation and treachery.
Surprisingly, I feel one of the famous stitches and I hold on to my nail to keep from falling, a civil gesture without implications that the guy interprets as love at first sight, another smile escapes me again, an attitude that keeps making things worse and the type โ mufa, impotence, pain and disgust through โ instinctively raises his bare foot and Bernabรฉ Ferreyra in his most glorious afternoon kicks me in the very center of the ass. For a moment we looked at each other, surprised.
ย ย ย ย ย ย A second later, the two of us, in unison, gave the initial cry, the call of Indian love, Tarzan sailing from vine to vine and summoning the entire African continent with a voice taken by an untimely cold and immediately we officially began the first world festival of cante jondo, not without qualifying it with calรฉ dance steps, and rabidly modern dance, all by bulerรญas.
Samuel, o Shmuel, Rollansky naciรณ en 1902, en una familia Litvish (es decir, E. Litvak) que residรญa en Varsovia. Tuvo una educaciรณn judรญa tradicional, asรญ como una educaciรณn secular en el gimnasio, algo un poco inusual para los inmigrantes en Argentina, donde llegรณ en 1922. De 1934 a 1973 escribiรณ una columna diaria para Di Yidishe Tsaytung de Buenos Aires. Rollansky dirigiรณ la rama argentina de la YIVO o IWOโฆ Ademรกs, fue autor de sketches teatrales, cuentos, ensayos e historias de la literatura y la prensa yiddish en Argentina y otros lugares. Es mejor recordado como el editor de Musterverk fun der Yidisher literatura, una serie de 100 volรบmenes de los clรกsicos de la literatura yiddish.
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Samuel, or Shmuel, Rollansky was born in 1902, into a Litvish (i. E. Litvak) family residing in Warsaw. He had a traditional Jewish as well as a secular gymnasium education, something slightly unusual for immigrants to Argentina, where he arrived in 1922. From 1934 to 1973 he wrote a daily column for Di Yidishe Tsaytung of Buenos Aires. Rollansky directed the Argentinean branch of the YIVO or IWO… In addition, he authored theater sketches, short stories, essays and histories of Yiddish literature and press in Argentina and elsewhere. He is best remembered as the editor of Musterverk fun der yidisher literatur, a 100-volume series of the classics of Yiddish literary classics.
Dos manos se apretaron cรกlidamente, entrelazados en el tradicional saludo de paz.
Los ojos opacos de Salomรณn de pronto se relucieron. En sus mejillas apareciรณ, como surgido desde adentro, un tono rosado. Se sintieron reconfortado, como un errante en tierra lejana y reseca, que ha encontrado un manantial, y la sombra de una arboleda. Su corazรณn emitรญa mรบsica, latรญa impetuosamente, en la espera de algo.
–Una montaรฑa no se encuentra a la otraโฆ
–ยฟPero un ser humano a su semejante?
— ยฟQuiรฉn podrรญa creerlo?
–Realmente, ยกMe alegra haberlo encontrado!
Salomรณn sonrรญa que la expresiรณn โme alegra verloโ. Pronunciada con sincera satisfacciรณn, parecรญa besarlo. Comenzรณ a ingerir aquellas palabras y tuvo la impresiรณn de que el hombre que lo habรญa dominado, se estaba aquietando en sus adentros, y que su agotamiento se disolvรญa. Estaba cansado a causa del prolongado caminar por las calles. Le parecรญa, a veces, que ya no se dirigรญa a lugares que habรญa anotado durante su lectura del diario, sino que se habรญa extraviado y caminaba errando, puesto que esas andanzas terminaban en la nada, puesto que esas andanzas lo recibรญan con desconfianza y como si sospecharan de รฉl, quizรกs porque allรญ la lengua que se le trababa, como si habรญese soรฑando y dormido. No encontraba aquello que buscaba; mientras lo que lo que sรญ hallaba, no concordaba con con la finalidad de sus indagaciones. Lo que se proponรญa era introducirse en la rueda de trabajos y ocupaciones que le eran ajenos; no obstante, no habรญa logrado formar parte de ella. Sus palabras solรญan enredarse y suscitaban desconfianza y sospechas.
Pese a todo, รฉl, Salomรณn, no se rendรญa. Proseguรญa sus andanzas y bรบsquedas. Mรกs bien caminaba errado.
–No siempre le va mal a uno โsolรญa consolarse a sรญ mismo. Es verdad que hace ya ocho semanas que estoy sin trabajo, pero uno no debe perder el รกnimo.
Su madre le habรญa enseรฑado la sentencia: โLa pรฉrdida de dinero es tan sรณlo perdida a medias; la pรฉrdida del รกnimo es pรฉrdida total y absolutaโ.
Y con este รกnimo, habรญa golpeado en una puerta ajena. Golpeaba con poca esperanza. No obstante, llegรณ a golpear.
Le abriรณ la puerta una joven, aparentemente no judรญa, cuyo cabello formaba bucles negros y brillosos. Despuรฉs de haber escuchado sus ruegos, dio la vuelta como si estuviera danzando, mostrรณ la elasticidad de su cintura y desapareciรณ de una puerta. Luego, le dijo que esperara y desapareciรณ detrรกs de una puerta, a la que cerrรณ con la traba.
Salomรณn quedรณ parado, como si fuese un mendigo. Se sentรญa contrariado a causa de esta larga espera frente a la puerta y ya estaba contemplando la posibilidad de alejarse sin decir nada a nadie. Pero con su mente cruzรณ la imagen de su esposa y de la criatura, que estaban esperando, confiando en que al y al cabo podrรญa conseguir algรบn trabajo y trajera algo a la casa; de ahรญ que su paciencia se fortaleciรณ y รฉl se tornรณ mรกs perseverante.
–ยฟQuรฉ se puede hacer โ se dijo a sรญ mismoโcuando el destino de uno depende de otros? Luego de una prolongada y paciente espera, la puerta se abriรณ. Para sorpresa de Salomรณn, la persona que habรญa salido a su encuentro era un hombre, circunstancia que le causรณ mucha alegrรญa desde el primer momento. De inmediato, dos manos se apretaron fuertemente, saludรกndose con el tradicional Sholem Aleรญjem.
–ยฟA quiรฉn ven mis ojos? jSeรฑor Salomรณn!
–Seรฑor Herman! Mendelโฆ
–Manuel โcorrigiรณ el dueรฑo de la casaโManuelโฆ
–Manuelโฆ quรฉ sorpresaโฆ
–Es realmente una sorpresa. jEntre, entre por favor! Entre y siรฉnteseโฆ asรญโฆ ahora, cuรฉnteme quรฉ es lo que lo que trae por aquรญ y cรณmo dio usted con mi direcciรณn. Quiere bebe algoโฆ –Gracias. Gracias โmientras hablaba, Salomรณn se sentรญa mรกs animado y fuerte—, he aquรญ que usted mismo puede ver cรณmo la vida lleva encuentros inesperados. Una montaรฑa no se encontrarรก con otra montaรฑa, pero un ser humano sรญ se encontrarรก con otro.
–Pero ยฟcรณmo encontrรณ mi direcciรณn? Seguramente por la guรญa telefรณnicaโฆ
–Eh, ยกel pan cotidiano es de uno es la mejor guรญa telefรณnica!
–ยฟUsted trabaja?
–Precisamente por este asunto vengo a visitarlo a su fรกbrica.
–ยฟAlgรบn negocio?
Salomรณn sonriรณ. Hubo amargura en esta sonrisa.
–Sรญโฆ negocioโฆ vengo a vender mis manosโฆ ยฟdarรญa algo por ellas?
El industrial quiso manifestar que era una persona amable y de confianza y dijo: –Tonterรญasโฆ comprar, no comprarโฆ ยกUsted sigue siendo un poeta!
–Y ยกquรฉ clase de poeta! โrepuso Salomรณn, dirigiendo las palabras mรกs a sรญ mismo que al dueรฑo de la casa e inclinรณ la cabeza.
Esta sรญ que es una vida con poesรญa. Mi vida es pura poesรญa โdijo con amargura.
Manuel Herman, reciรฉn afeitado, llevaba un traje bien planchado y su cabeza brillaba, por el fijador con que el que habรญa untado sus cabellos. Mantenรญa las manos en los bolsillos, mientras escuchaba a su visitante. Se mostrรณ compasivo.
–Asรญ es, asรญ esโฆ cuando llegamos en el mismo barco. Todos pensaban que usted se iba ganar todo el oro de esta Amรฉricaโฆ Un hombre que sabe usar su pluma, cuya lengua es infatigableโฆ ยฟQuiรฉn soy yo en comparaciรณn con usted? Mendel el zapatero e hijo de zapaterosโฆ
Salomรณn sacรณ un paรฑuelito, se secรณ el rostro, como si hubiera cansado de tanto hablar. Hizo un intento de manifestar su bondad y finura:
–Yo no lo envidio y lo felicito de todo corazรณn, seรฑor Herman. Si hablamos de envidia, los hay muchos mรกs grande que usted, para mostrarle mi envidia, Como dice el refrรกn โCuando uno se decide ya a comer porcino, la grasa deberรญa llenarle la boca y gotear el mentรณnโ. Por otra parte, la envidia es para mรญ lo mismo que para la carne porcina para un judรญo muy religioso. Yo me alegro por sus logros, de todo corazรณn. El que lo envidia a usted, ยกojalรก que no tenga nada! Lo que usted tiene, no me quitรณ a mรญ y ยกque lo aproveche!
–Gracias.
–Y bien, ยฟes decir que su fรกbrica es grande?
El โcompaรฑero de viajeโ llevรณ a Salomรณn mรกs adentro del patio, bajo un techo de lata, numerosas mรกquinas, mesitas y estanterรญas sobre las paredes. Alrededor una multitud de hombres y mujeres, sumidos en su trabajo. Los estantes estaban abarrotados con grandes y pesados bultos, tan numerosos que cubrรญan el local a lo alto, a lo ancho y a lo largo.
–โ ยกSin mal de ojo! โdijo Salomรณn, fascinado–.
Usted lo hizo todo a lo grande, con planes muy ambiciosos, como puede verse bien. Bienโฆ yoโฆ yoโฆ ยฟtal vez podrรญa conseguir aquรญ pequeรฑo puesto, algo para hacer? Soy del oficio. Ya habรญa trabajadoโฆ
–Lamentablemente โฆ como puede verloโฆ la fรกbrica es grande… pero, tal vez como ve, todos los puestos se encuentran ocupados.
–Sin embargo โcomenzรณ o rogar Salomรณn–. ยฟQuรฉ importancia tiene, en una fรกbrica tan grande como รฉsta, una sola persona mรกs? ยฟAcaso significa algo?
–ยกEntiรฉndame โdijo de pronto el fabricante de tonoโen una fรกbrica grande como รฉsta, una persona significa poco o nada! Peroโฆ ยฟCรณmo decรญrselo? ยฟUsted comprende? Yo no podrรญa soportar ser su patrรณn. Mi corazรณn no me permite ser su patrรณn. Es un juego muy claro y comprensible. Fuimos, en un tiempo, compaรฑeros de viaje, lo que se dice schrif-brider o sea โhermanos de barcoโ. Usted โun descendiente de una familia de richachonesโy yo, un zapatero. Y bien, mi corazรณn no me permiteโฆ
Eh, ยกEsto carece de importancia! โintentรณ Salomรณn minimizar el asunto– ยฟQuรฉ valor tiene hoy en dรญa la alcurnia? ยฟA quiรฉn le interesa actualmente la ascendencia de uno? ยฟAcaso se puede con alcurnia obtener un crรฉdito en algรบn banco? Los tiempos de ahora son otros. Es otra รฉpoca. ยกQuรฉ tiene que ver todo esto con el asunto yo vine a verlo? Soy un obrero que necesita trabajo; usted, un empresario que podrรญa dรกrmelo. Es muy simple. Nada mรกs
–Ah, seรฑor Salomรณn, trabajo es mucho mรกsโฆ
–Claro que es mucho mรกs. Trabajo es pan. Y yo necesito pan. Mi mujer y mi niรฑ0 esperan que yo les lleve ese pedacito de pan.
El industrial, con las manos en los bolsillos, intentรณ estirar su cuerpo como se hubiese querido, poniรฉndose en punto de pies, aparecer mucho mรกs alto de lo que en realidad era, como se pretendiera otorgar una dimensiรณn a sus palabras, moviendo la cabeza, dijo en tono decisivo: –ยกNo puedo, querido amigo! Todo lo que quieras, pero esto no. Si pudiera, harรญa por ti cualquier cosa. Pero mi corazรณn no admite la posibilidad, de que yo me convierta en su patrรณn. Simplemente, no lo puedo hacer. Y, ยฟquรฉ mรกs quiere que te diga?
Traducido del idish por Simja Sneh.
Del libro: Hungier tsu der Zet. โHambre hasta saciarseโ.
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“Ship Brothers”
“Oh, who do I see?” Two hands were warmly squeezed, entwined in the traditional greeting of peace. Solomon’s opaque eyes suddenly glittered. A rosy hue appeared on her cheeks, as if from within. They felt comforted, like a wanderer in a distant and parched land, who has found a spring and the shade of a grove. His heart was making music, beating wildly, waiting for something.
“One mountain does not meet the other… –But a human being does?”
“Who could believe it?”
“Really, I’m glad I found you!”
Solomon smiles than the expression โI’m glad to see youโ. pronounced with sincere satisfaction, it seemed to kiss him. He began to swallow those words and gave the impression of a man who had mastered himsel. He was quieting down inside, andhis exhaustion dissolved. He was tired from the long walk through the streets. It seemed to him, at times, that he was no longer going to places that he had written down while reading the diary, but that he had gotten lost and wandered, since these wanderings ended in nothing, since these wanderings received him with distrust and as if they suspected him, perhaps because his tongue was stuck there, as if he had been dreaming and asleep. He did not find what he was looking for; while what he did find did not agree with the purpose of his inquiries. What he proposed was to enter the wheel of jobs and occupations that were foreign to him; however, he had not managed to become part of it. His words used to get tangled up and aroused mistrust and suspicion. Despite everything, he, Solomon, did not give up. He continued his wanderings and searches. Rather he was walking in the wrong direction.
“It doesn’t always go badly for one,” he used to console himself. It is true that I have been without work for eight weeks now, but one must not lose heart. His mother had taught him the sentence: โThe loss of money is only half lost; loss of spirit is total and utter loss.โ And in this spirit, he had knocked on someone else’s door. He struck with little hope. However, he came to knock. The door was answered by a young woman, apparently not Jewish, whose hair was in shiny black ringlets. Having listened to his request, she turned around as if she were dancing, showed the elasticity of her waist, and disappeared from a door. Then, she told her to wait and disappeared behind a door, which she locked with the latch. Solomon was left standing, as if he were a beggar. He was annoyed by this long wait in front of the door and was already contemplating the possibility of walking away, without saying anything to anyone. But with his mind he crossed the image of his wife and the child, who were waiting, trusting that after all he could get a job and bring something home; hence his patience strengthened and he became more persevering. “What can be done,” he said to himself, “when one’s destiny depends on others?”
“Who do my eyes see? Mr. Solomon!” “Mr. Herman! Mendelโฆ” “Manuel,” corrected the owner of the house, “ManuelโฆManuelโฆ what a surpriseโฆ” “It’s really a surprise. Come in, come in please! Come in and sit downโฆ like thisโฆ now, tell me what you bring here and how you found my address. Want to drink somethingโฆ” “Thank you. Thanks.” As he spoke, Solomon felt more animated and strong, behold, you can see for yourself how life brings unexpected encounters. A mountain will not meet another mountain, but a human being will meet another. “But how did you find my address?” Probably from the phone bookโฆ “Eh, the daily bread is one’s is the best telephone directory!” “You work?” “Precisely for this matter I come to visit you at your factory.” “Any business? Solomon smiled. There was bitterness in this smile.
“Yesโฆ businessโฆ I come to sell my handsโฆ would I give anything for them?” The industrialist wanted to show that he was a kind and trustworthy person and said: “Nonsenseโฆ buy, don’t buyโฆ You’re still a poet!” “And what class of poet!” Solomon replied, directing the words more to himself than to the owner of the house and bowed his head. “This is indeed a life with poetry. My life is pure poetry,” he said bitterly. Manuel Herman, freshly shaved, was wearing a well-pressed suit and his head was shiny from the cream which he had put on his hair. He kept his hands in his pockets as he listened to his visitor. He was compassionate.
“That’s right, that’s right… when we arrived on the same boat. Everyone thought that you were going to win all the gold in this America… A man who knows how to use his pen, whose tongue is indefatigable… Who am I compared to you? Mendel the shoemaker and son of shoemakers…”
Solomon took out a handkerchief, wiped his face, as if he had gotten tired of talking so much. He made an attempt to manifest his kindness and finesse:
“I do not envy you, and I congratulate you with all my heart, Mr. Herman. If we talk about envy, there are many bigger than you, to show you my envy, As the saying goes “When one decides to eat pork, the fat should fill his mouth and drip down his chin.” On the other hand, envy is the same for me as it is for pork for a very religious Jew. I am glad for your achievements, with all my heart. He who envy you, I hope he has nothing! What you have, you did not take from me and make the most of it!”
“Thank you.”
“Well, do you mean that your factory is big?”
The โship bother” took Solomon further into the courtyard. Under a tin roof were numerous machines, small tables and shelves on the walls. Around them, a crowd of men and women, immersed in their work. The shelves were crammed with great, heavy bundles, so numerous that they covered the height, width, and length of the room.
โKeep away the evil eye!”
Solomon said, fascinated. You did everything in a big way, with very ambitious plans, as can be seen. Wellโฆ Iโฆ Iโฆ maybe I could get here a little place, something to do? I’m from the trade. I have already worked…”
“Unfortunately… as you can see… the factory is big… but, perhaps as you can see, all the positions are occupied.”
“However,” Solomon began to plead. “What is the importance, in a factory as big as this, of just one more person? Does it mean something?”
โUnderstand me,โ his tone changed suddenly, โin a big factory like this, one person means little or nothing! But… How to tell him? You understand? I couldn’t bear to be your boss. My heart does not allow me to be your boss. It is a very clear and understandable game. We were, at one time, travel companions, what is called schrif-brider or โship brothersโ. Youโa descendant of a wealthy familyโand I, a shoemaker. Well, my heart does not allow me…”
“Hey, that is unimportant!” Solomon tried to minimize the matter. “What value does lineage have today? Who is currently interested in one’s ancestry? Is it possible with lineage to obtain a loan in any bank? The times of now are different. It is another era. What does all this have to do with the matter I came to see you? I am a worker who needs work; you, a businessman who could give it to me. It’s very simple. Nothing else “
“Ah, Mr. Salomon, work is much more… “
“Of course it is much more. Work is bread. And I need bread. My wife and my child are waiting for me to bring them that little piece of bread.”
The industrialist, with his hands in his pockets, tried to stretch his body as he wanted, standing on his feet, appearing much taller than he really was, as if to give dimension to his words, shaking his head, said decisively:
“I can’t, dear friend! Anything you want, but not this. If I could, I would do anything for you. But my heart does not admit the possibility that I become his employer. I just can’t do it. And what else do you want me to tell you?”
From book: Hungier tsu der Zet. Hunger, Until You’re Satisfied (Translation from Yiddish by Simja Sneh)
Deborah Leipziger (Brasil) รฉ poetisa, autora e consultora de sustentabilidade. Ela atualmente reside em Boston, Estados Unidos. ร autora da coleรงรฃo de poemas Flower Map, publicada pela Finishing Line Press (2013). quatro de seus poemas foram indicados ao prรชmio Pushcart. Seus poemas foram publicados no Reino Unido, Estados Unidos, Israel, Canadรก e Holanda, e em revistas e jornais como Salamander, Lily Poetry Reviewe POESY. Ela รฉ co-fundadora da Soul-Lit, uma revista online de poesia. E autor de vรกrios livros sobre sustentabilidade e direitos humanos, alguns dos quais traduzidos para chinรชs, coreano e portuguรชs. Ela estรก trabalhando em um projeto sobre โa linguagem da sustentabilidadeโ, onde combina seu amor pela linguagem e pela natureza.
_________________________________
Deborah Leipziger (Brasil) es poeta, autora y asesora en Sostenibilidad. En la actualidad, reside en Boston, Estados Unidos. Es autora del poemario Flower Map, publicado por Finishing Line Press (2013). Cuatro de sus poemas han sido nominados al premio Pushcart. Sus poemas se han publicado en el Reino Unido, Estados Unidos, Israel, Canadรก y los Paรญses Bajos, y en revistas y periรณdicos como Salamander,Lily Poetry Review y POESY. Es cofundadora de Soul-Lit, una revista virtual de poesรญa. Y autora de varios libros sobre sostenibilidad y derechos humanos, algunos de los cuales han sido traducidos al chino, coreano y portuguรฉs. Estรก trabajando en un proyecto sobre โel lenguaje de la sostenibilidadโ, donde combina su amor por el lenguaje y la naturaleza.
______________________________________
Deborah Leipziger (Brazil) is a poet, author and consultant on Sustainability. He currently resides in Boston, United States. She is the author of the Flower Map collection of poems, published by Finishing Line Press (2013). Four of her poems have been nominated for the Pushcart Prize. Her poems have been published in the UK, USA, Israel, Canada and the Netherlands, and in magazines and newspapers such as Salamander,Lily Poetry Review and POESY. She is co-founder of Soul-Lit, an online poetry magazine. And author of several books on sustainability and human rights, some of which have been translated into Chinese, Korean and Portuguese. He is working on a project about โthe language of sustainabilityโ, where she combines her love for language and nature.
Lobo
For Paulo Paulino Guajajara, known as โLoboโ, who was a โGuardian of the Amazonโ, killed by illegal loggers
I guard the forest
its canopy of reflected stars
the morpho butterflies the blue moons
bromeliads the fish
the roots of trees
drinking in the river
I guard the forest
the children of the tribe
I guard the canopy with its toucans parakeets
emerald
I guard the forest floor with its snakes
I guard the mating jaguars
I knew
they would kill me.
I could not have imagined
that it would be a shot to the
face that my body would be
left in the forest
Now
You guard the forest
its canopy of reflected stars
the morpho butterflies the blue moons
bromeliads the fish
the roots of trees
drinking in the river
You guard the forest
the children of the tribe
You guard the canopy with its toucans parakeets
emerald
You guard the forest floor with its snakes
You guard the mating jaguars
____________________________________
Lobo
Escrito em homenagem ร Paulo Paulinho Guajajara, que era um โGuardiรฃo da Amazรดniaโ, morto por madeireiros ilegais
Sou sentinela da floresta
da sua copa de estrelas espelhadas
suas borboletas, das luas azuis
dos piriquitos, das bromรฉlias, dos peixes
das raรญzes das รกrvores
bebendo do rio.
Sou sentinela da selva
das crianรงas gujajara.
Protejo a copa da floresta,
os tucanos, os beija flores.
Protejo a mata, suas cobras.
Sou guarda
dos jaguares se juntando.
Sempre soube
que iriam me matar,
porรฉm nunca imaginaria
que iriam me balear
no rosto,
que deixariam o meu corpo
na selva.
Agora vocรช
serร a sentinela da selva
sua copa de estrelas espelhadas
suas borboletas, das luas azuis
dos piriquitos, das bromelias, dos peixes
das raรญzes das รกrvores
bebendo do rio.
Sou sentinela da selva
das crianรงas guajajara.
Protejo a copa da floresta,
os tucanos, os beija flores.
Protejo a mata, suas cobras.
Sou guarda
dos jaguares se juntando.
Traduรงรฃo de Deborah Leipziger
_______________________________
The Green Ravine
In the ravaged city the Green Ravine
cools you
after the heat island.
The dragonflies intertwine their bodies in the shape of infinity.
You hear the heat
lift the cenzontle birds.
You sense the lizards.
You feel the water lifted into air. This is where water is born.
Inspired by a virtual field trip with Lucrecia Masaya, of the Green Ravine in Guatemala City at the Nature of Cities Conference, 2021, during the COVID-19 pandemic.
________________________________________
A ravina verde
Na cidade devastada a ravina verde
te refresca
depois da ilha de calor
As libรฉlulas se entrelaรงam criando o sรญmbolo do infinito.
Escuto o calor
levantando os pรกssaros centzotles
Vocรช sente a presenรงa das lagartas.
Vocรช sente a รกgua levantando no ar. ร aqui que a รกgua nasce.
Inspirado por uma viagem de campo virtual com Lucrecia Masaya, do Green Ravine na Cidade da Guatemala na Nature of Cities Conference, 2021, durante a pandemia de COVID-19.
Traduรงรฃo de Deborah Leipziger
_____________________________________
Al espaรฑol:
Written on Skin
In cursive and script your kiss
is indelibly written on skin.
Even now, the cut from your birth
echoing the rain is written on skin.
The numbers from a time of horror
are held written on skin.
Just as the rings record the age of the tree
my ages and phases are written on skin.
The wood from the forest for the violin
its music etched in wood, written on skin.
The umbilical cord coiled around my neck
is still there, pulsating purple, written on skin.
The parchment of history of storied sacrifice
is written on hides, written on skin.
In ink and dust, blood and bruise
my history is written on skin.
The newspaper stories of massacre
collapse and famine are written on skin.
Gems with facets etched by stone
hidden in garments, written on skin.
Your touch on my earlobe, fingerprints on my face
words and deeds unbidden, written on skin.
_____________________________________________________
Escrito en la piel
En letra cursiva y guion tu beso
estรก escrito indeleble en la piel
incluso ahora, el corte de su nacimiento
que hace eco de la lluvia estรก escrito en la piel
Los nรบmeros de una รฉpoca de horror
se llevan escritos en la piel
Asรญ como los anillos registran la edad del รกrbol
mis edades y fases estรกn escritas en la piel
La madera del bosque para el violรญn
su eco grabada en la madera, escrito en la piel
El cordรณn umbilical enrolladlo alrededor de mi cuello
sigue ahรญ, pulsante de color pรบrpura, escrito en la piel
El pergamino de la historia del sacrificio histรณrico
estรก escrito en pieles, escrito en la piel
En tinta y polvo, sangre y magulladura
mi historia estรก escrita en la piel
Las noticas sobre masacres
el colapso y el hambre estรกn escritos en la piel
Gemas con facetas grabadas por piedra
escondidas en prendas, grabadas en la piel
Tu caricia en mi lรณbulo de la oreja, huellas dactilares en mi rostro
las palabras y acciones espontรกneas, escritas en la piel
Translated by Marรญa Del Castillo Sucerquia
_______________________________________
Sugaring
After Safia Elhillo
i was made of almonds and sugar
of giving and receiving
of coast lines dug deep with departure
and arrival, of boats and boundaries seeking refuge
for my Nonna, all desserts began
with grating almonds and sugar recreating home
with latticework in marizipan
i was born under dictatorship under the light
of the southern cross
tasting of sugar dissolving into coconut and clove tangled
in the umbilical cord
my mother told me no one
would ever love me
like she did. now I know
she was right and wrong
my daughters born of gingerbread
under a coup dโivorce
hold the light, the dark
of my countries
____________________________________
Azucarada
Despuรฉs de Safia Elhillo
Yo estaba hecha de almendras y azรบcar
de dar y recibir
de literales excavadas hondas con partida
y llegada de barcos y fronteras en busca de refugio
para mi Nonna, todos los postres โ โ empezaban
con ralladura de almendras y azรบcar โ โ recreando el hogar
con celosรญas en el mazapรกn
nacรญ bajo la dictadura bajo la luz
de la cruz del sur
saboreando el azรบcar que se disuelve en el coco y el clavo de enredado
en el cordรณn umbilical
mi madre dijo que nadie
me amarรญa
como ella lo hizo ahora yo
sรฉ que tenรญa razรณn y no
mis hijas nacieron de pan de jengibre
bajo el coup dโivorce
sostienen la luz, la oscuridad
de mis paรญses
Translation by Marรญa Del Castillo Sucerquia
_______________________________________
You as a forest
I listen to the shelter of you
the sweeping canopy
cradling the day and night of me t
he moon rising in your branches
the stars falling into the sweep of your hair.
I see the feet of your forest the fingers,
the limbs the concave and convex of you,
the light that falls around us.
I smell your maple, fern, ivy.
The light serpentine falling through the rings of redwoods
__________________________________________
Tรบ, un bosque
Escucho el refugio de ti
el amplio toldo que acuna el dรญa
y la noche de mรญ
la luna asomรกndose en tus ramas
las estrellas cayendo
en la silueta de tu pelo
veo los pies de tu bosque
los dedos, los muslos
lo cรณncavo y convexo de ti
huelo tu aroma de arce
helecho, hiedra
la luz serpentina cayendo
entre los anillos de la roja se secuoya
Translated by Marรญa Del Castillo Sucerquia
__________________________________________
Honeycomb
I fell asleep inside the honeycomb
the bees called to me humming, thrumming
I fell asleep inside the honeycomb
the hive alive the singing, the stinging
all night the bees taught me the language
of pollen,
the scent of stamen
the ringing,
the brimming
And the sun rose inside the honeycomb
and I awoke inside the honeycomb the dripping, the sipping
I awoke inside the honeycomb with the stunning, the becoming
________________________________________________
Panal
Me dormรญ dentro del panal
me llamaron las abejas, tarareando, tamborileando
Me dormรญ dentro del panal
la colmena viva el canto, el picor
toda la noche las abejas me enseรฑaron el idioma del polen
el olor del estambre
el zumbido, el rebosante
el sol se levantรณ dentro del panal
y me despertรฉ dentro del panal el goteo, los sorbos
me despertรฉ dentro del panal con el asombro, el definir
Translated by Marรญa Del Castillo Sucerquia
____________________________________________
The Creation of Turquoise
it didnโt happen all at once
the elders would say later
then again, it seldom does
every creation is intentional
even destruction can take its time,
rather it was the inexorable
chipping away of the sky
one kernel at a time
small fragments of
rupture, rapture
and when the sky touched the earth
the impact created
veins in the stone
so each turquoise would tell a story
of sky and earth, colliding
__________________________________________________________________
La creaciรณn de la turquesa
no sucediรณ
dirรญan los ancianos mรกs tarde
por otra parte, rara vez sucede
toda creaciรณn es intencional
incluso la destrucciรณn requiere de tiempo
mรกs bien, fue le inexorable
astillamiento del cielo
un grano a la vez
pequeรฑos fragmentos de ruptura, รฉxtasis
la caricia del cielo a la tierra
ahora, la turquesa
cuenta la historia del cielo y la tierra, aquel impacto
Translated by Marรญa Del Castillo Sucerquia
________________________________________________________________
Blue FugueWhen you were born, the Room turned Blue.
I became Blue cold veins frozen.
The Blue became a Room.
Both of you Blue whisked Away
I, cut open.
When you were born, the Room turned Blue.
In a Blue gown,
My mouth, unable to form ice words.
The Blue became a Room.
When I was born, I was Blue.
The womb was Blue, the Blue cord around my neck.
When you were born, the Room turned Blue.
Alone, waiting, warming,
Until they brought you back.
The Blue sky becomes a Room.
_________________________________________________________________
La fuga azul
cuando naciste
se tornรณ Azul la habitaciรณn
mis venas se tomaron Azul y รกlgidas
el Azul se volviรณ una Habitaciรณn
los dos Azules se alejaron pronto
yo, un corte abierto
cuando naciste
se tornรณ Azul la Habitaciรณn
con una bata Azul
mi boca es incapaz de formar
palabras de hielo
el Azul se volviรณ una Habitaciรณn
cuando nacรญ, era Azul
el รบtero, Azul
un cordรณn Azul rodeando mi nuca
cuando naciste se tornรณ Azul la Habitaciรณn
sola
esperaba
calentarme
te trajeron de suelto
el Cielo Azul se tornรณ
el Cielo Azul de Vuelta
Translated by Marรญa Del Castillo Sucerquia
______________________________________________________
Gustavo Efron es Lic. en Ciencias de la Comunicaciรณn (UBA) y Magรญster en Ciencias Sociales c/or. en Educaciรณn (FLACSO). Se especializa en temรกticas de juventud, nuevas tecnologรญas y educaciรณn. Su tesis de maestrรญa fue sobre โLa re-configuraciรณn identitaria de los jรณvenes y su representaciรณn de la Educaciรณn en la pos-modernidad o modernidad tardรญaโ. Es profesor titular de la materia โAdolescencias, Juventudes y Escuelaโ, en la Especializaciรณn en Docencia Secundaria, de la Universidad de Buenos Aires y en el Curso El Rol del Preceptor, Perspectivas de Anรกlisis, de la misma instituciรณn. Es profesor-tutor en la Diplomatura โEducaciรณn, imรกgenes y mediosโ de FLACSO Argentina; y actualmente es responsable de Capacitaciรณn de la Direcciรณn de Jรณvenes y Adultos del Ministerio de Educaciรณn Nacional. Fue creador y director de la Licenciatura en Ciencias de la Comunicaciรณn de la Universidad de Flores (UFLO). Desde 2010, Gustavo Efron es Director del Periรณdico Nueva Siรณn en Buenos Aires. Su primero libro de poesรญa es Hay Un Silencio (2023).
Gustavo Efron has a degree in Communication Sciences (UBA) and a Master’s in Social Sciences c/or. in Education (FLACSO). He specializes in youth issues, new technologies and education. His master’s thesis was on “The identity reconfiguration of young people and their representation of Education in post-modernity or late modernity.” He is a tenured professor of the subject “Adolescents, Youth and School”, in the Specialization in Secondary Teaching, of the University of Buenos Aires and in the Course “The Role of the Preceptor, Perspectives of Analysis,” of the same institution. He is a professor-tutor in the Diploma plan “Education, images and media” of FLACSO Argentina; and is currently responsible for Training of the Directorate of Youth and Adults of the Ministry of National Education. He was the creator and director of the Bachelor of Communication Sciences at the University of Flores (UFLO). Since 2010, Gustavo Efron is Director of the Nueva Siรณn Newspaper in Buenos Aires. His first book of poetry is Hay Un Silencio (2023).
Lo inabordable
Aunque pueda decir mucho
aunque pretenda comprender
aunque me esfuerce en expresar
aunque logre comunicar
Y aunque el mundo se presente ante mi como transparente,
abierto, integrador...
siempre habrรก significados escurridizos
algo que se escape y se resista a ser traducido
una expresiรณn inabordable
una esencia inclasificable
un pensamiento que desborde los moldes.
Porque el mundo no resiste un sentido รบnico
un objetivo final
una explicaciรณn coherente
una conclusiรณn tranquilizadora
una soluciรณn integral al conflicto.
Y no lloro ni me lamento por ello
mรกs bien brindo y lo reivindico
como el รบnico ejercicio posible de la libertad
como una riqueza sustentada en lo diverso y lo dinรกmico
como una proyecciรณn hacia lo inesperado y lo sorprendente
como un plus insospechado que promete vida
Una vida que supere esta vida.
________________
The Unapproachable
Even if I may talk a lot
even if I try to understand
even if I force myself to speak
even if Iโm successful in communicating
And even if the world shows itself to me as
transparent,
open, ingratiatingโฆ
There will always be slippery meanings
something that escapes and resists translation
an unapproachable expression
an unclassifiable essence
a thought that overflows the mold
Because the world resists one meaning
a final objective
a coherent explanation
a tranquilizing conclusion
an integral solution
I donโt cry about it or lament
rather I raise a toast and vindicate it
as the only possible exercise of liberty
as wealth supported in the diverse and the dynamic
like a projection toward the unexpected and the
surprising
like an unsuspected plus that promises life
A life that surpasses this life.
___________________________________________
Juego
Juego
a que soy diferente
a que la vida no me moldea
a que resisto
a que cambio
a que puedo
a que no abandono las luchas
a que me involucro en algo
a que siento en carne propia
Y no sรฉ los lรญmites de ese juego
los lรญmites entre lo real y lo verosรญmil
entre la postura y lo postulado
entre la autoconciencia y la autoafirmaciรณn
entre la exigencia y la complacencia
simplemente, juego
y en todo juego
como en todo simulacro
detrรกs de la bruma
trasuntan vestigios de verdad
de una verdad escurridiza.
a que siento en carne viva cada infamia
a que me rebelo
a que escapo a lo consolidado
a que invento
a que sueรฑo.
________________________________
I Play
I play
at being different
at life's not molding me
at resisting
at changing
at what I can do
at not giving up the fight
at getting involved
at feeling in my own body
and not knowing the boundaries of the game
the boundaries between the real and what seems real
between posing and the postulate
between self-consciousness and self-affirmation
between exigence and complacency
Simply put, I play
and in every game
as in every simulation
behind the fog
leftovers of the truth
a slippery truth appear.
at feeling in my living body every infamy
at rebelling
at escaping to stability
at inventing
at dreaming.
______________________________________________
Fugacidades
Sรณlo un relรกmpago del mundo me pertenece
las tormentas me son ajenas
tengo el sabor de los frutos
no los dulces que empalagan hasta el exceso.
A veces mi porciรณn es tan generosa
otras tan ridรญcula
y sin embargo es siempre la misma.
Algunas tardes me apropio de una nube
la hago mรญa por un instante y luego la abandono a los vientos.
En ocasiones atrapo una sonrisa furtiva
pero se escapa, no puedo retenerla
y la dejo huir a uno de esos lugares donde respira el vacรญo.
Vengo con mis poemas llenos de sรณrdidos encantos
y de sensaciones agotadas que reaparecen
sรณlo un fugaz suspiro del mundo me pertenece.
____________________________________________
Ephemeralities
Only a lightning bolt from earth belongs to me
storms are foreign
I have a taste for fruits
not the sweet ones that make you sick.
At times my portion is so generous
at others so ridiculous
and none the less always the same.
Some afternoons I take over a cloud
make it mine for an instant and then abandon it to the
winds.
On occasion I trap a furtive smile
but it escapes, I canโt hold on to it
and I let it flee to one of those places where it breathes
emptiness.
I arrive with my poems full of sleazy enchantments
and drained sensations that reappear
only a fleeting whisper of the world belongs to me.
_____________________________________
Canaleta
Entre la locura y la costumbre
entre la magia y el aburrimiento
entre el esplendor y el desamparo
voy construyendo una canaleta
pequeรฑas rendijas donde se cuela el alma.
ยฟcuรกnto hay que llorar para seguir riendo?
ยฟcuรกnto hay que morir para seguir viviendo?
ยฟcuรกnto hay que vivir para seguir muriendo?
______________________________________________
Channel
Magic and boredom
Come between madness and custom
between splendor and abandonment
I keep constructing a channel
small cracks where the soul seeps in.
how much must you cry to go on laughing?
How much must you die to go on living?
How much must you live to go on dying?
__________________________________________
Sentires
Quiero contarte mis colores
esos de adentro
pero mis palabras son vagas
mis tonos son ocres
y el reflejo tan pรกlidoโฆ
Quiero convidarte mis sabores
y no puedo
no me sale
no son esos que siento ahรญ
a la vuelta de las pulsaciones.
Quiero contagiarte mis locuras
pero son tan ridรญculamente mรญas
que sรณlo podrรกn causar tu curiosidad
a lo sumo tu ternura.
Si pudiera mostrarte
aunque sea un horizonte fugaz donde mirarme
mancharte en aquel charco donde se sumergen mis desperdicios
dibujar una mirada que deje ver los claroscuros
y llevarte a la esquina de mis latidos...
Pero no hay colores
no hay sabores ni locuras
ni horizontes ni charcos
ni miradas ni esquinas
sรณlo mis versos y mi almohada
y un tรญmido despertar.
______________________________________
Feelings
I want to tell you my colors
those inside me
but my words are vague
my tones are ochre
and the reflection so paleโฆ
I want to introduce you to my tastes
and I canโt
they donโt emerge from me
they arenโt those that I feel there
on the way to my heartbeats.
I want to infect you with my delusions
but the tastes are so ridiculously mine
they can only engage your curiosity
at most your affection.
If I could show you
Even if it is a quick sightline where you can find me
Stain you in that puddle where my effluent is drowned
To sketch a gaze that lets me see chiaroscuros
And carry you to the street corner of my heartbeatsโฆ
But there are no colors
no tastes no delusions
no horizons no puddles
no views no corners
only my poems and my pillow
and a faint-hearted awakening.
___________________________________________
Ruta desolada
Encontrarse es perderse
es deambular en el humo del contrasentido
perdiendo la comodidad en la contradicciรณn
perdiendo el simulacro en la incongruencia
perdiendo la sobriedad en la frescura
perdiendo la impostura en la ridiculez.
En ese lodo que te ensucia y te deja pegoteado
en esa rรกfaga que sorprende tu cabeza acostumbrada
en ese ruido que perturba tu silencio ausente.
Un encuentro con el desencuentro
con la inmadurez de esa ruta desolada
con la insoportabilidad de esa fiera dormida
que no sabe si algรบn dรญa va a despertar.
_____________________________
Desolate Route
Finding yourself is losing yourself
it is strolling in the smoke of nonsense
losing comfort in contradiction
losing semblance in incongruence
losing sobriety in freshness
losing fraud in absurdity.
In all that defiles you and leaves you held back
in that gust that surprises your ordinary head
In that noise that perturbs your absent silence.
An agreement with a disagreement
with the immaturity of that desolate route
with the unbearable quality of that sleeping beast
that doesnโt know if it will someday awake.
_______________________________________________
Tengo una palabra
Tengo una palabra que ya no dice nada
una palabra que puja
contenida en su propia telaraรฑa
que busca una nueva manera de hablar
sin saber cรณmo.
Una palabra que dibuja el vacรญo
que agota el sentido
y que en ese devenir cansado ya es un enigma
de esos que no se pueden desentraรฑar.
Una palabra que condensa el sonido y el silencio
una y otra vez
que revela tanto como lo que esconde
una palabra sumisa
que flota en el viento con todo su espesor
y sus espinas.
ยฟDรณnde vivirรก esa palabra?
ยฟDรณnde morirรก?
_____________________________________
I Have a Word
I have a word that no longer means anything
a word that entangles
content in its own spiderweb
and looks for a new way to speak
without knowing how.
A word that sketches emptiness
That uses up meaning
and that in becoming tired is already a riddle
of those that cannot be unraveled.
A word that condenses sound and silence
again and again
that reveals as much as it hides
a submissive word
that floats in the wind with all its density
and its thorns.
Where will that word live?
Where will it die?
__________________________________________
Yo no escribo poesรญa
Yo no escribo poesรญa
la poesรญa me escribe a mรญ
me escribe como una respiraciรณn del tiempo
que se revela, y me rebela en su desparpajo y su tozudez.
Crรฉanme, yo no escribo poesรญa
la poesรญa me escribe como una cachetada del mar
como escribe el exabrupto del fuego
siempre a los saltos y en descomposiciรณn.
Y me escribe sin querer escribirme
Y me nombra sin querer nombrarme
Y me mata sin querer matarme
para poder seguir viviendo.
_______________________________________________
I don't write poetry
I don't write poetry
poetry writes to me
writes me like a breath of time
that reveals itself, and rebels in its self-confidence and stubbornness.
Believe me, I don't write poetry.
poetry writes me like a slap from the sea
writes like the outbreak of fire
always jumping and decomposing.
And it writes me without wanting to write me
And it names me without wanting to name me
And it kills me without wanting to kill me
to be able to go on living.
____________________________________________
Hay un silencio
Hay un silencio que me nombra
que me desnuda
que me revela
que me ilumina.
Y es siempre el mismo silencio
un silencio a veces incรณmodo
a veces inhรณspito
a veces acogedor.
Es un silencio que habla de muchos silencios
del alma hurgando en un atardecer
de una mรบsica que ya no puedo recordar
de un aroma que se me escapa
de un viento que se filtra en la ventana.
Un silencio que se esconde de la mirada
y en los ritmos intensos de la palabra furtiva.
___________________________________________
There is a Silence
There is a silence that names me
undresses me
reveals me
illuminates me.
And it is always the same silence
a silence at times uncomfortable
at times inhospitable
at times welcoming.
It is a silence speaking of many silences
of the soul rummaging in a dusk
of music I can no longer remember
of an aroma that escapes me
of a wind that filters through the window.
A silence that hides the gaze
even in the intense rhythms of the furtive word.
_________________________________________________________
Translated from the Spanish by Stephen A. Sadow and J. Kates
Pablo A. Freinkel (Bahรญa Blanca, Argentina, 1957). Licenciado en Bioquรญmica. Periodista y escritor. Sus artรญculos y notas se han dado a conocer en Buenos Aires, New York y Jerusalem; y en medios online nacionales y extranjeros. Es autor de cuatro libros: Diccionario Biogrรกfico Bahiense, el ensayo Metafรญsica y Holocausto, y las novelas El dรญa que Sigmund Freud asesinรณ a Moisรฉs y Los destinos sagrados. Escribiรณ el guiรณn del documental Matthias Sindelar: un gol por la vida. Ha dictado conferencias sobre Spinoza, Maimรณnides y literatura judรญa argentina actual, en diferentes instituciones del paรญs. Escribiรณ las novelas El lector de Spinoza y La casa de Caรญn.
_______________________________
Pablo A. Freinkel (Bahรญa Blanca, Argentina,) who has a degree in biochemistry. He is a journalist and writer. His articles and notes have been published in Buenos Aires, New York and Jerusalem, in Argentine and international online media. Freinkel is the author of four books: Diccionario Biogrรกfico Bahiense, Metafรญsica y Holocausto, and the novel El dรญa que Sigmund Freud asesinรณ a Moisรฉs and Los destinos sagrados. He wrote the script for Matthias Sindelar: un gol por la vida. He has lectured on Spinoza, Maimonides and on contemporary Argentine-Jewish literature throughout Argentina. His recent novels El lector de Spinoza is in press and La casa de Caรญn.
____________________________________
“Zinger“
Hallรฉ en el apartado de avisos fรบnebres del periรณdico en lรญnea que leรญa la siguiente necrolรณgica:
โCon la desapariciรณn fรญsica de Marga Dalla Ponte, a causa de una cruel enfermedad, el arte nacional pierde a una de sus mรกs seรฑeras representantes. Como docente ofreciรณ clases magistrales, condujo talleres, promoviรณ a nuevos valores con generosidad y el interรฉs puesto en revalidar tรญtulos para nuestro paรญs en el complejo mundo de las experiencias visuales. Retirada de las aulas y las exposiciones desde hacรญa aรฑos, fue escasa la cantidad de gente que se convocรณ a despedir sus restos. Descanse en paz, maestra y amigaโ.
A continuaciรณn, se leรญa el siguiente texto:
โZelda Inger participa el fallecimiento de su dilecta amiga, puntal indeclinable en รฉpocas de triste memoria, y ruega una oraciรณn a su amada memoriaโ.
Tenรญa pendiente una visita a Eugenia de Pritzker para comunicarle, entre otros puntos, que me disponรญa a dar por concluida la tarea de ordenar los archivos de don David, ya que en las nuevas condiciones me resultaba poco menos que imposible atender esta contingencia. Asimismo, me proponรญa exponerle algunos asuntos que la involucraban de manera directa. … La encontrรฉ, como era habitual, sentada en la cocina, apenas distraรญda su concentraciรณn en el televisor encendido.
-Me alegra que el cuadro te haya sido รบtil y remunerativo- dijo con cierto toque rencoroso no bien me vio entrar.
-Se equivoca. La idea no fue venderlo, todo lo contrario. Nos pareciรณ una manera de honrarlo a tantos aรฑos de su primera y รบnica exhibiciรณn. Sin contar la carga trรกgica que transmite, es muy bello. Habla muy bien de su creador, de sus habilidadesโฆ Por otra parte, es suyo y puedo restituรญrselo cuando lo desee.
No contestรณ, se limitรณ a entregarme una larga mirada no exenta de atenciรณn.
-ยฟMe permite contarle una historia que no por breve no deja de ser dramรกtica?- Hizo un ademรกn con la mano como si el asunto careciera de importancia-. Habla de una joven llamada Zelda que deseaba dedicar su vida al arte pero encontrรณ la fรฉrrea oposiciรณn de su padre, quien tenรญa otros planes no sรณlo para ella sino tambiรฉn para el resto de sus hijos. Sin embargo, al principio tolerรณ sus aspiraciones de convertirse en una artista, seguramente con el convencimiento de que cuando creciera abandonarรญa esos disparates y retornarรญa al buen camino. Fue todo en vano.
-Ignoro a quiรฉn te referรญs โesbozรณ como protesta-. Nunca conocรญ a esas personas.
Continuรฉ sin reparar en su interrupciรณn:
-Esta diferencia alcanzรณ su desenlace cuando estallรณ la Guerra de los Seis Dรญas entre el joven Estado de Israel contra poderosos ejรฉrcitos de los paรญses vecinos. Las primeras jornadas estuvieron marcadas por la incertidumbre, la angustiaโฆ Revivieron los fantasmas que apenas treinta aรฑos antes condujeron a los campos de concentraciรณn, al exterminio de nuestros hermanos, a la horrible visiรณn de contemplar a los judรญos arrojados al mar, como azuzaban los enemigos. Seguramente en el alma sensible de Zelda se desatรณ una tormenta de sentimientos. Desesperaciรณn, temor extremo, congojaโฆ Entonces recurriรณ a la รบnica herramienta de que disponรญa, que le permitรญa expresarse con entera libertad. Encerrada en su cuarto, en veinticuatro horas de trabajo intenso, febril, surgiรณ la mujer del retrato, esa mujer que personificaba el horror vivido por nuestro pueblo a lo largo del siglo XX. Me imagino que el tรญtulo emergiรณ como una epifania y, es cierto, tuvo toda la intenciรณn de provocar, incitar una respuesta emocional: โNuestra Seรฑora de Auschwitzโ.
El rostro de Eugenia se ensombrecรญa cada vez mรกs. Ya no reflejaba ironรญa o desprecio, sino una combinaciรณn de ira y pesar.
-Fue entonces cuando Zelda dijo: โMedia Humanidad se apiada por la crucifixiรณn de un judรญo y muy pocos por la masacre de tantos millonesโ.
Sus ojos se abrieron desmesuradamente por la sorpresa. No obstante, se obstinaba en mantenerse callada. Empecรฉ a dudar de la certeza de mis argumentos. Un punto de exasperaciรณn tiรฑรณ el rostro de la mujer; un instante despuรฉs descargรณ su rencor.
-No entiendo por quรฉ me contรกs esta fรกbula, me resulta por completo extraรฑa โdijo con acritud e intentando minimizar su impacto.
-Por favor, Eugenia, dรฉjeme terminar y despuรฉs le explico. La respuesta fue un silencio beligerante que no significaba aceptaciรณn sino condescendencia.
-A pesar de la realizaciรณn de la obra โproseguรญ-, el objetivo de manifestar su mensaje no se hubiese cumplido sin haber logrado exponerla al pรบblico. Es entonces cuando aparece Reina Benazar, la prima de la madre de Zelda, propietaria de una galerรญa de arte. Sin consultar con nadie, tomรณ la decisiรณn de llevarle una fotografรญa del retrato -imagen que pude contemplar- y esperar su juicio. Supongo que la pintura la conmoviรณ y aceptรณ de inmediato ponerla a la consideraciรณn del pรบblico. Presentรณ una รบnica objeciรณn: el tรญtulo. Probablemente evaluรณ que era mejor no provocar y si bien Israel habรญa logrado imponerse en la guerra, subsistรญan sentimientos negativos. Reina fue quien propuso โLa dama de la Shoรกโ. Para una artista novel que tenรญa ante sรญ la magnรญfica oportunidad de mostrar un trabajo de su autorรญa, tal sugerencia no generรณ ningรบn litigio. Estaba obnubilada con la posibilidad de efectuar su primera muestra, por lo tanto no deseaba arruinar la oferta. Estoy convencido de que ella hoy se plantarรญa y lucharรญa por imponer sus principios. Entonces, medio siglo atrรกs, joven e inexperta acatรณ la determinaciรณn que le imponรญan con el fin de no perder una ocasiรณn propicia.
-Al enterarse de la propuesta de Reina y, peor todavรญa, la respuesta positiva que recibiรณ, la declaraciรณn de guerra quedรณ ratificada. El doctor Ingerbrock no aceptรณ ni una ni la otra y prohibiรณ a su hija todo movimiento tendiente a ese fin. En pocas palabras, Zelda se sintiรณ inflamada por el viento de la rebeldรญa y dejรณ atrรกs el hogar familiar. Se impuso un ostracismo feroz con el propรณsito de castigar la intransigencia de la que era vรญctima, aunque con este proceder castigaba con el mismo golpe a su madre y hermanos.
De esta manera, sola en el mundo, lejos de sus vรญnculos mรกs cercanos, se hizo presente la imperiosa necesidad de un techo que la cobijara y, por quรฉ no, de un cรกlido abrazo que la contuviera. La rรฉplica a esta inquietud me la proporcionรณ la participaciรณn necrolรณgica que Zelda Inger publicรณ con motivo del fallecimiento de Magda Dalla Ponte donde califica a su amiga de, tratarรฉ de mencionar la cita textual, โpuntal indeclinable en รฉpocas de triste memoriaโ. Me preguntรฉ cuรกl podrรญa ser esa desgraciada circunstancia y cuรกl el lazo que vinculara a dos mujeres tan diferentes que de hecho ni siquiera tenรญan contacto en la actualidad. La respuesta, entonces, debรญa estar en el pasado de ambas y en lo que una vez compartieron. La pintura, el arte, la insatisfacciรณn por los cรณdigos patriarcales… Marga entonces fue mรกs que la maestra, la consejera. Fue quien la recibiรณ cuando abandonรณ la casa paterna. ..
-Resta ahora considerar la llegada de un nuevo personaje: David Pritzker. โEugenia me mirรณ fijamente, anhelante por saber con quรฉ testimonio avalarรญa mis deducciones-. David y Cecilia se conocieron por intermedio de los hermanos de ella. Aunque era mayor, David, estudiante de abogacรญa, sentรญa una afinidad ideolรณgica con los otros dos debido al sionismo, el socialismo, el nuevo Estado judรญo. Eran comunes las discusiones pero al final la sangre no llegaba al rรญo, como se dice. Ella se mantenรญa al margen de esas cuestiones terrenales imbuida en sus afanes artรญsticos. Sin embargo, entre ambos comenzรณ a crecer una afectividad que trascendรญa la polรญtica, el afรกn de arreglar el mundo.
โDavid se enterรณ de la novedad por Israel y Moisรฉs, devastados por la ausencia de su hermana. Supongo que hasta se ofreciรณ a mediar entre padre e hija para considerar su regreso. Sin embargo, ninguno de los dos estuvo dispuesto a resignar sus posiciones. No tengo dudas que el enamorado futuro abogado moviรณ cielo y tierra hasta que finalmente obtuvo el dato, ignoro quiรฉn se lo proveyรณ si bien puedo suponer que el soplo vino de alguien muy prรณximo a ellos, que la dueรฑa de sus suspiros se hospedaba en casa de Marga. A pesar de sus reiterados pedidos para que la jovencita desistiera de su actitud, no se rindiรณ. Asรญ, las visitas se hicieron habituales, siempre bajo la supervisiรณn de la inquisitiva y desconfiada chaperona, y la exigencia de discreciรณn absoluta si รฉl deseaba continuar con ellas.
Por primera vez en mi ya extenso monรณlogo advertรญ una distensiรณn en los apretados rasgos del rostro de la anciana. Habรญa tocado una fibra muy รญntima; supongo que los recuerdos habrรกn caรญdo en cascada sobre su atribulado espรญritu.
-Hay ocasiones en que actuamos de manera impulsiva y entonces resulta muy difรญcil volver atrรกs โdijo en voz baja, casi como un pensamiento hacia su interior. Era la resquebrajadura que esperaba en la coraza, una concesiรณn que abrรญa nuevos e inesperados caminos.
Aguardรฉ a que ese nuevo estado se consolidara, una evoluciรณn que se desplegara en forma natural. La mujer me mirรณ desde una nueva perspectiva, casi dirรญa liberada de una prisiรณn que ella misma habรญa tejido alrededor suyo, representada por una nueva luz en sus ojos, mรกs diรกfana.
-ยฟCรณmo supiste el gesto de Marga? โToda traza de rencor habรญa desaparecido; ahora habรญa serenidad en su voz, como si se hubiese desprendido de un peso cargado desde siempre.
-Por el texto de la necrolรณgica de su fallecimiento. Confiรณ en que ocultando su verdadera identidad tras nombres que no son los usuales en usted esquivarรญa la atenciรณn de los indiscretos que nunca faltan. El tiempo oculta todo, pero los detalles siempre estรกn allรญ y cuando menos se los espera, regresan.
-No tuve en cuenta la fina percepciรณn de Marcos Opatoshu. โNo hubo cinismo ni malicia en esas palabras, fue un aserto pronunciado al pasar.
-Por fin, David recibiรณ su tรญtulo y fue entonces cuando le propuso matrimonio. Frente a esta realidad se disipaba cualquier otra consideraciรณn. Si no aceptaba, su vida transcurrirรญa siempre oculta y quizรก sin ninguna otra posibilidad de constituir una familia; la otra, volver a casa y rogar el perdรณn del padre vaya a saber a quรฉ precio. De esta manera, el pretendiente obtuvo el consentimiento con una condiciรณn de hierro. La ceremonia serรญa discreta, restringida a unos pocos invitados de su familia. Seguramente, el novio pensรณ que se presentaba una excelente ocasiรณn para limar todas las asperezas e iniciar su vida en comรบn sin deudas. A pesar de los requerimientos planteados, aceptรณ. Sin dudas, no era la boda que ninguno de los esperaban celebrar algรบn dรญa, pero, como se dice, era lo que habรญa.
Una breve pausa dio pรกbulo a que ella se hiciera cargo del curso del relato.
-Nos casamos en un shill pequeรฑo de la periferia, con una jupรก[1] encima nuestro y el nรบmero exacto de hombres para conformar un miniรกn[2]. Estoy segura de que David aleccionรณ a su familia para que no pregunten nada acerca de la ausencia de la mรญa, cosa que siempre le agradecรญ si bien รฉl jamรกs me hizo comentario alguno. Al terminar la ceremonia, nos dirigimos a una sala pequeรฑa donde hicimos un lejaim[3]. โUn par de dรญas antes nos casamos por civil y otra vez David se encargรณ de los detalles. Y ahรญ terminรณ todo.
-ยฟCuรกndo decidiรณ cambiarse el nombre Cecilia o Zelda por Eugenia?
-En el momento de redactar la ketubah[4]. Fue una especie de homenaje a una tรญa postiza que siempre apoyรณ mi vocaciรณn. Muriรณ antes del comienzo de este desastre.
-En ese documento deben asentarse los nombres de los padres del novio y de la novia, asรญ como los testigos.
-No sรฉ. De los detalles se encargรณ David. Creo que hablรณ con un rabino amigo. Por otra parte, mi padrino fue un gran amigo suyo. Segismundo, el librero.
-Tambiรฉn es mi amigo.
โAhora comprendรญ su reticencia a abundar en detalles sobre la cuestiรณn.
-Lo sรฉ. Siempre le agradecรญ su discreciรณn. Es una buena persona.
Un descanso marcรณ el final de ese capรญtulo que debiรณ haber sido muy amargo en su vida. Fue un silencio breve, cargado de emotividad, sin resentimientos. Se la veรญa agitada, intranquila, quizรก ansiosa por llegar al final de estas memorias.
-ยฟSe siente bien, Cecilia? ยฟQuiere que dejemos acรก? โA propรณsito la llamรฉ por su nombre real. Ella se dio cuenta y sentรญ que me lo agradecรญa con sus ojos hรบmedos por la emociรณn. Finalmente habรญa marcado el lรญmite con ese pasado inpiadoso.
-No, querido. Sigamos. Tal vez esta confesiรณn ejerza un efecto sanador, despuรฉs de todo. Por favor, alcanzame un vaso de agua. Realicรฉ su pedido. Bebiรณ a pequeรฑos sorbos, como degustando la frescura y el sabor del lรญquido.
-ยฟCรณmo siguieron adelante? โdije una vez que me asegurรฉ de que habรญa recuperado sus condiciones.
-Alquilamos un pequeรฑo departamento alejado del centro. Yo permanecรญa encerrada la mayor parte del dรญa por temor a que alguien me reconociera. David empezรณ a trabajar como apoderado de una cooperativa de crรฉditos y tambiรฉn en La Voz Israelita en una vacante temporal, ad honorem. Era lo que mรกs le gustaba. Tiempo despuรฉs, la vacante se hizo permanente y reforzรณ nuestra economรญa. Pudimos mudarnos aquรญ con la esperanza de recibir a los hijos que vendrรญan en un lugar propio. Sin embargo, nunca llegaron. Luego de tantos aรฑos, sigo creyendo que fue el castigo a mi soberbia. Pero en ese momento estaba como ciega. Supe del fallecimiento de mi padre y le neguรฉ mi รบltimo homenaje; tambiรฉn partiรณ mi mamรก, a la que siempre reprochรฉ su pasividad, su desinterรฉs en defender mi causa, insignificante causa egoรญsta.
-Creo que ya debe dejar de responsabilizarse por todo, perdonarse. โLa interrumpรญ para evitar la cadena de pesados eslabones de la propia recriminaciรณn.
-Fue tan difรญcil, Marcos. Y el pobre David a mi lado, soportando los embates de mis enojos. No dudo que te habrรก llamado la atenciรณn la dureza con que te contรฉ pormenores de la relaciรณn de David con Zelda.
โCierto, asรญ fue-. Nunca existiรณ nada de eso. Fue un recurso tonto para poner distancia una vez mรกs entre ese diabรณlico personaje que una vez fui y yo como soy en la actualidad. Pero, como dicen, el personaje se comiรณ a la persona. ..
-Voy a pensarlo โconcluyรณ con una nota de duda en el tono. .. Finalmente habรญa marcado el lรญmite con ese pasado impiadoso.
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[1]Hebreo: abarcante. Palio nupcial bajo el cual se colocan los novios y sus padrinos. Representa la divina presencia que estรก sobre ellos para convertirlos en uno. [2]Hebreo: cifra, nรบmero. Es un nรบmero mรญnimo de diez varones judรญos mayores de 13 aรฑos, requerido para la realizaciรณn de ciertos rituales, el cumplimiento de preceptos, o la lectura de oraciones. Representa el nรบmero de personas que Abraham querรญa salvar como รบltima opciรณn, cuando Dios le revelรณ que destruirรญa Sodoma y Gomorra.[3]Hebreo: por la vida. Nombre que se le da al brindis judรญo. [4]Hebreo: escrito. Es el acta o contrato matrimonial en el que se declara que el matrimonio se ha celebrado de comรบn acuerdo y se detallan los derechos y obligaciones de la pareja. Figuran los nombres de los novios y de sus padres, en hebreo y en espaรฑol, de los testigos de boda y la fecha de la ceremonia (en el calendario hebreo y, en algunos casos, en ambos calendarios).
I found in the funeral notices section of the online newspaper that it read the following obituary:
โWith the physical disappearance of Marga Dalla Ponte, due to a cruel illness, national art loses one of its most distinguished representatives. As a teacher, he offered master classes, conducted workshops, and promoted new values โโwith generosity and interest in revalidating titles for our country in the complex world of visual experiences. Withdrawn from classrooms and exhibitions for years, the number of people who were summoned to say goodbye to his remains was scarce. Rest in peace, teacher and friend.
The following text was then read: “Zelda Inger participates in the death of her dear friend, an indeclinable mainstay in times of sad memory, and asks a prayer to her beloved memory.” —-
I had a visit to Eugenia de Pritzker pending to inform her, among other things, that I was about to conclude the task of ordering Don David’s files, since in the new conditions it was almost impossible for me to deal with this contingency. Likewise, I proposed to present to her some issues that directly involved her. …
I found her, as usual, sitting in the kitchen, her concentration barely distracted by the television on. “I’m glad that the painting has been useful and remunerative for you,” he said with a certain spiteful touch as soon as he saw me enter.
-You are wrong. The idea was not to sell it, quite the opposite. We thought it was a way to honor him so many years after his first and only exhibition. Without counting the tragic charge that it transmits, it is very beautiful. It speaks highly of its creator, of his skills… On the other hand, it’s yours and I can return it to you whenever you want. She didn’t answer, shr just gave me a long look, not without attention.
-Allow me to tell you a story that, not because it is brief, is still dramatic?- She made a gesture with his hand as if the matter were unimportant-. It tells of a young woman named Zelda who wanted to dedicate her life to art but met with fierce opposition from her father, who had other plans not only for her but also for the rest of his children. However, at first he tolerated her aspirations to become an artist, surely in the belief that when she grew up she would abandon such nonsense and return to the right path. It was all in vain. “I don’t know who you’re referring to,” he outlined in protest. I never met those people. I continued without noticing his interruption:
-This difference reached its outcome when the Six Day War broke out between the young State of Israel against powerful armies from neighboring countries. The first days were marked by uncertainty, anguish… The ghosts that barely thirty years before had led to the concentration camps, to the extermination of our brothers, to the horrible vision of contemplating the Jews thrown into the sea, as the enemies urged on, revived. Surely in Zelda’s sensitive soul a storm of feelings was unleashed. Despair, extreme fear, anguish… Then he resorted to the only tool at his disposal, which allowed him to express himself with complete freedom. Locked in her room, in twenty-four hours of intense, feverish work, the woman in the portrait emerged, that woman who personified the horror experienced by our people throughout the 20th century. I imagine that the title emerged as an epiphany and, it is true, it was fully intended to provoke, to incite an emotional response: โOur Lady of Auschwitzโ. Eugenia’s face darkened more and more. It no longer reflected irony or contempt, but a combination of anger and regret. -It was then that Zelda said: “Half Humanity takes pity for the crucifixion of a Jew and very few for the massacre of so many millions.” His eyes widened in surprise. However, she persisted in keeping quiet. I began to doubt the accuracy of my arguments.
A point of exasperation suffused the woman’s face; an instant later she vented her grudge. “I don’t understand why you are telling me this fable, it seems completely strange to me,” she said bitterly, trying to minimize its impact.
-Please, Eugenia, let me finish and I’ll explain later. The answer was a belligerent silence that did not signify acceptance but condescension. -Despite the realization of the work โI continued-, the objective of expressing its message would not have been fulfilled without having managed to expose it to the public. It is then that Reina Benazar, the cousin of Zelda’s mother, who owns an art gallery, appears. Without consulting anyone, she made the decision to take him a photograph of the portrait – an image that I was able to see – and await its trial. I guess the painting moved her and she immediately agreed to put it up for public consideration. She raised only one objection: the title. She probably assessed that it was better not to be provocative, and although Israel had managed to prevail in the war, negative sentiments persisted. Reina was the one who proposed โThe Lady of the Shoahโ. For a new artist, who had before her the magnificent opportunity to show a work of her own, such a suggestion did not generate any dispute. She was obsessed with the possibility of having her first showing, so she didn’t want to ruin the offer. I am convinced that she would stand up today and fight to impose her principles. Then, half a century ago, young and inexperienced, she complied with the restriction imposed on her in order to not to miss a propitious opportunity.
Upon learning of Reina’s proposal and, even worse, the positive response she received, the declaration of war was ratified. Dr. Ingerbrock did not accept either one or the other and forbade his daughter any movement towards that end. In short, Zelda felt inflamed by the winds of rebellion and left the family home behind. A fierce ostracism was imposed with the purpose of punishing her intransigence. She was a victim, but although with this action, she punished her mother and brothers with the same blow. In this way, alone in the world, far from her closest ties, the urgent need for a roof that sheltered her and, why not, a warm hug that contained her, became present. The reply to this concern was provided to me by the obituary article that Zelda Inger published on the occasion of the death of Magda Dalla Ponte where she described her friend as, I will try to mention the direct quote, “an indeclinable mainstay in times of sad memory.”
I wondered what this unfortunate circumstance could be and what was the bond that linked two women so different who, in fact, weren’t even have contact at that moment. The answer, then, must lie in their past and in what they once shared. Painting, art, dissatisfaction with patriarchal codes…
Marga then was more than the teacher, the counselor. She was the one who received her when she left the parental home. ..
-Now it remains to consider the arrival of a new character: David Pritzker. Eugenia looked at me fixedly, anxious to know what testimony she would use to support my deductions. David and Cecilia met through her brothers. Although he was older, David, a law student, felt an ideological affinity with the other two because of Zionism, socialism, the new Jewish state. Arguments were common but in the end the blood did not reach the river, as they say. She stayed away from those earthly issues, and was imbued with artistic pursuits.
However, between the two began to grow an affectivity that transcended politics, the desire to fix the world. โDavid learned of the news from Israel and Moses, devastated by the absence of their sister. I suppose he even offered to mediate between father and daughter to consider his return. However, neither of them was willing to resign their positions.
I have no doubt that the enamored future lawyer moved heaven and earth until he finally obtained the information, I do not know who provided it to him, although I can assume that the tip came from someone very close to them, that the owner of his sighs was staying at Marga’s house. Despite his repeated requests for the young woman to give up her attitude, she did not give up. Thus, the visits became habitual, always under the supervision of the inquisitive and distrustful chaperone, and the requirement of absolute discretion if he wished to continue with them. For the first time in my already lengthy monologue I noticed a relaxation in the tight features of the old woman’s face. It had struck a very intimate chord; I suppose the memories must have cascaded over his troubled spirit.the woman persisted in keeping unaffected.
Eugenia looked at me fixedly, anxious to know what testimony she would use to support my deductions. David and Cecilia met through her brothers. Although he was older, David, a law student, felt an ideological affinity with the other two because of Zionism, socialism, the new Jewish state. Arguments were common but in the end the blood did not reach the river, as they say. She stayed away from those earthly issues imbued with her artistic pursuits. However, between the two began to grow an affectivity that transcended politics, the desire to fix the world. David learned of the news from Israel and Moses, devastated by the absence of their sister. I suppose he even offered to mediate between father and daughter to consider his return. However, neither of them was willing to resign their positions. I have no doubt that the enamored future lawyer moved heaven and earth until he finally obtained the information, I do not know who provided it to him, although I can assume that the tip came from someone very close to them, that the owner of his sighs was staying at Marga’s house. Despite his repeated requests for the young woman to change her attitude, she did not give up. Thus, the visits became habitual, always under the supervision of the inquisitive and distrustful chaperone, and the requirement of absolute discretion if he wished to continue with them.
For the first time in my already lengthy monologue I noticed a relaxation in the tight features of the old woman’s face. It had struck a very intimate chord. I suppose that the memories had come down in a cascade over her troubled spirit.
-There are times when we act impulsively and then it’s very difficult to go back,” she said quietly, almost like an inward thought.
It was the crack tin the armor that I was waiting for, a concession that opened new and unexpected paths.
I waited for this new state to consolidate, an evolution that unfolded naturally. The woman looked at me from a new perspective, I would almost say released from a prison that she herself had woven around her, represented by a new, more diaphanous light in her eyes.
-How did you know about Marga’s gesture? โAll trace of rancor had disappeared; now there was serenity in his voice, as if a weight that had always been loaded down had been shed.
-From the text of the obituary of her death. She trusted that by hiding your true identity behind names that are not your usual ones, you would avoid the attention of the indiscreet people who are never absent. Time hides everything, but the details are always there and when you least expect them, they come back.
-I did not take into account the fine perception of Marcos Opatoshu. โThere was no cynicism or malice in those words, it was an assertion pronounced in passing
-Finally, David received his title and that’s when he proposed to her. Faced with this reality, any other consideration dissipated. If she did not accept, her life would always be spent in hiding and perhaps without any other possibility of starting a family; the other, to go home and beg the father’s forgiveness at who knows what price. In this way, the suitor obtained consent with an iron condition. The ceremony would be low-key, restricted to a few of her family guests. Surely, the groom thought that this was an excellent opportunity to iron out all the rough edges and start their life together debt-free. Despite the requirements raised, he accepted. Undoubtedly, it was not the wedding that any of them expected to celebrate one day, but, as they say, it was what it was.
A brief pause prompted her to take charge of the course of the story.
-We got married in a small shill on the outskirts, with a chuppah (1) above us and the exact number of men to make up a minyan (2). I am sure that David taught his family not to ask anything about my absence, which I always thanked him for, although he never made any comment to me. At the end of the ceremony, we went to a small room where we made a lechaim. (3)
-A couple of days before, we had gotten married civilly and once again David took care of the details. And there it all ended.
-When did you decide to change your name Cecilia or Zelda to Eugenia?
-At the time of writing the ketubah.(4) It was a kind of tribute to a false aunt who always supported my vocation. He died before the start of this disaster. -This document must include the names of the parents of the groom and the bride, as well as the witnesses. -I don’t know. David took care of the details. I think he spoke to a friendly rabbi. On the other hand, my godfather was a great friend of his, Segismundo, the bookseller.
-He is also my friend. I now understand your reluctance to go into detail on the matter.
-I know. I always appreciated his discretion. He is a good person.
This was a break marked the end of that chapter that must have been very bitter in her life. It was a brief silence, charged with emotion, without resentment. She looked agitated, restless, perhaps anxious to get to the end of these memories.
-Are you feeling well, Cecilia? Do you want us to stop here? I purposely called her by her real name. She noticed that, and I felt her thank me with her eyes moist with emotion. ..She had finally drawn the line with that unforgiving past. ..
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[1]Hebrew: encompassing. Bridal canopy under which the bride and groom and their godparents are placed. It represents the divine presence that is over them to make them one. [2]Hebrew: figure, number. It is a minimum number of ten Jewish men over the age of 13, required for the performance of certain rituals, the fulfillment of precepts, or the reading of prayers. It represents the number of people that Abraham wanted to save as a last option, when God revealed to him that he would destroy Sodom and Gomorrah.[3]Hebrew: for life. Name given to the Jewish toast. [4]Hebrew: written. It is the marriage certificate or contract in which it is declared that the marriage has been celebrated by mutual agreement and the rights and obligations of the couple are detailed. The names of the bride and groom and their parents, in Hebrew and Spanish, of the wedding witnesses and the date of the ceremony (in the Hebrew calendar and, in some cases, in both calendars) appear.
Marcos Ribak, mรกs conocido como Andrรฉs Rivera fue un escritor y periodista argentino. Hijo de inmigrantes obreros, naciรณ en el barrio porteรฑo de Villa Crespo. Moisรฉs Rybak, desde Polonia, donde era un comunista perseguido; en Buenos Aires llegรณ a ser dirigente del gremio del vestido. Rivera fue obrero textil antes de dedicarse al periodismo y la literatura. Participรณ en el movimiento obrero argentino y, como su padre, militรณ en el Partido Comunista (PC). Trabajรณ en la redacciรณn de la revista Plรกtica (1953-1957) y debutรณ en la ficciรณn con la novela El precio (1956), muy cercana a la estรฉtica del realismo social, al igual que la siguiente, Los que no mueren, y tres libros de cuentos, Sol de sรกbado, Cita y El yugo y la marcha. En 1964 Rivera fue expulsado del PC y su visiรณn del mundo experimentรณ una transformaciรณn, que se reflejรณ en su obra como su libro de relatos Ajuste de cuentas, aparecido en 1972, al que seguirรก un silencio de 10 aรฑos: en 1982 publica el volumen de cuentos Una lectura de la historia y la novela Nada que perder. Dos aรฑos despuรฉs aparece En esta dulce tierra, con la que obtendrรก su primer premio, al que posteriormente le seguirรกn importantes distinciones entre las que cabe destacar el Nacional de Literatura y el Konex.
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Marcos Ribak, better known as Andrรฉs Rivera, was an Argentine writer and journalist. The son of worker immigrants, he was born in the Buenos Aires neighborhood of Villa Crespo. Moisรฉs Rybak, from Poland, where he was a persecuted communist; in Buenos Aires he became a leader of the dress guild. Rivera was a textile worker before dedicating himself to journalism and literature. He participated in the Argentine labor movement and, like his father, was a member of the Communist Party (PC). He worked in the writing of the magazine Plรกtica (1953-1957) and debuted in fiction with the novel El precio (1956), very close to the aesthetics of social realism, like the following, Those who do not die, and three books of stories, Sol de sรกbado, Cita and El yugo y la marcha. In 1964 Rivera was expelled from the PC and his vision of the world underwent a transformation, which was reflected in his work such as his book of short stories Ajuste de cuentos, published in 1972, which was followed by a silence of 10 years: in 1982 he published the volume of stories A reading of the story and the novel Nada que perder. Two years later En esta dulce tierra appears, with which he won his first prize, which was later followed by important distinctions, including the National Literature Award and the Konex Award.
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El corrector
Ella y yo trabajรกbamos en una editorial de capitales europeos, y que se preciaba de haber publicado la primera Biblia que usaron los jesuitas en tierras de Mรฉxico. A la hora del almuerzo, ella y yo nos quedรกbamos solos. Los otros correctores, la cartรณgrafa (ยฟera una sola?), las tipiadoras, las mujeres de dedos velocรญsimos de la oficina de cobranzas, las secretarias de los gerentes salรญan a ocupar sus mesas en los bodegones que abundaban por los alrededores de la empresa y, sentados, pedรญan ensaladas ligeras y Coca-Cola. Ella, a esa hora, extraรญa, de su bolso, revistas en las que aparecรญan figuras ululantes con nombres que, probablemente, castigaban algo mรกs que mi ignorancia de hombre cercano a las edades de la vejez. Ella, a esa hora, escupรญa, en una caja de cartรณn depositada al pie de su escritorio, un chicle que masticรณ durante toda la maรฑana y suplantaba el chicle por un sรกndwich triple de miga, jamรณn cocido y queso. Tambiรฉn cruzaba las piernas y un zapato se balanceaba en la punta del pie de la pierna cruzada sobre la otra. Ese viernes, ella llevaba puesto un walkman. Yo no mirรฉ su cara en el mediodรญa de ese viernes de un julio huรฉrfano de alegrรญa: mirรฉ un fino hilo de metal que brillaba un poco mรกs arriba de la leve tapa de su cabeza, y despuรฉs mirรฉ su cabeza, y mirรฉ su largo y lacio pelo rubio. Dejรฉ de suprimir gerundios aborrecibles en el original de una novela que llevaba vendidos quince mil ejemplares de su primera ediciรณn, antes de que la novela y los gerundios que sobrevivirรญan a las infecundas expurgaciones de la correcciรณn se publicaran, y cuyo autor, la cotizaciรณn mรกs alta de la narrativa nacional, es un hombre que ama el vino y el boxeo, y aprecia las bromas inteligentes, y caminรฉ hasta el escritorio de ella. Y cuando lleguรฉ hasta el escritorio de ella, mirรฉ, por encima de la cabeza de ella, y de la corta antena de su walkman, el cielo de ese mediodรญa de viernes. Mirรฉ, por las anchas ventanas de la sala vacรญa y silenciosa, el cielo gris, y algรบn techo desolado, y unas sรกbanas puestas a secar que batรญan el aire frรญo y violento. Me agachรฉ, y agachado, me arrastrรฉ debajo de su escritorio, y allรญ, en una tibieza polvorienta, hincado, le acariciรฉ el empeine del pie, el talรณn y los dedos del pie, por encima de la seda negra de la media. Ese ablandamiento de una elasticidad tensa y frรญa durรณ lo que ella quiso que durase. La calcรฉ y, despuรฉs, me puse de pie, y frente a ella, le preguntรฉ, en voz baja, si la habรญa molestado. Ella me mirรณ. Y sus labios, empastados con manteca y queso de mรกquina, me prometieron un invierno interminable. -Hacelo otra vez -dijo, y le brillaron los dientes empastados, ellos tambiรฉn, todavรญa, con miga, manteca y queso de mรกquina.
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The Corrector
She and I were working in a publishing house in one of the European capitals that prided itself fin publishing the first Bible that the Jesuits used in Mexican lands. At lunch time, she and I stayed by ourselves. The other copy editors, the map editor (was there only one?), the typists, the women with extremely fast fingers from the business office, the bossesโ secretaries left to occupy their tables in the nearby cheap restaurants that were in abundance around the business, and seated, ordered light salads and Coca-Cola. She, at that time, extracted, from her bag, ululating figures with names, that probably, suggested something beyond that my ignorance of a man approaching old age. She, at that hour, was spitting, into a cardboard box set at the foot of her desk, a piece of gum that she chewed all morning long and replaced the gum with a triple sandwich of cheap bread, cooked ham and machine-cut cheese. She also crossed her legs and a shoe on the point of the foot of the leg crossed over the other. That Friday, she had on a Walkman. I didnโt look at her face at noon of that Friday of July, an orphaned happiness: I looked at a fine wire if metal that shined a little bit above the light top of her head, and then I looked at her head, and I looked at her long and straight blond hair. I stopped excising abhorrent gerunds in the original of a novel that had sold fifteen thousand copies of its first edition, before the novel and the gerunds that survived the sterile expurgations of the correction were published, and whose author, the most highly rated of the national narrative, is a man who love wine and boxing and appreciated intelligent jokes, and I walked up to her desk. And when I arrived at her desk, I looked above her head and the short antenna of her Walkman, the sky of that Friday midday. I looked through the wide window of the empty and silent room, at the gray sky, and some desolate roof, and some sheets put out to dry that flapped in the cold and violent wind. I bent down, and bent down, I pulled myself below her desk. And there, in the dusty warmth, I caressed the instep of her foot, her heel and her toes, on the black silk of her stocking. That softening of a tight and cold elasticity lasted for as long as she wanted it to last. I put her shoe on and then, I stood up in front of her, I asked her, in a low voice, if I had bothered her. She looked at me. And her lips, covered with butter and cheap cheese, promised me an interminable winter. โDo it again,โ she said, and her covered teeth shined, they too, still with bread, butter, and machine-cut cheese.
Translation by Stephen A. Sadow
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La mecedora
ย El neurรณlogo dice esto: dos aรฑos atrรกs, me leyรณ las conclusiones del informe aรฑadido a una polisomnografรญa nocturna a la que, le consta, me sometรญ desdeรฑoso y resignado. El neurรณlogo que se parece, demasiado, a un caballero inglรฉs -algo asรญ como un jugador de polo vestido, de los hombros a los tobillos, con una bata blanca, y rubio, atildado, de estatura y edad medianas y ojos frรญos y claros-, me pregunta, no muy ansioso, como fatigado, si recuerdo algo de aquella lectura. ย Me alzo de hombros y miro sus ojos claros y frรญos, su cabello rubio y el nudo irreprochable de su corbata, y su devociรณn por el Martรญn Fierro, de la que me hizo partรญcipe, en una lejana tarde de verano, cuando se abandonรณ, displicente e inescrutable, a la celebraciรณn de los silencios de la pampa. El neurรณlogo dice -y el tono de su voz es algo mรกs fuerte que un susurro- que el informe elaborado a partir de esa polisomnografรญa nocturna (a la que me entreguรฉ, repite, dรณcil y abstraรญdo), corresponde a una persona normal, salvo por una observaciรณn que รฉl, el neurรณlogo, omitiรณ mencionar en mi รบltima visita, por razones obvias. ย Yo miro el humo del cigarrillo que sube, leve y lento, y blanquรญsimo, hacia una ventana por la que entra la luz de la tarde. ยฟEs una luz de otoรฑo? ยฟMansa? ยฟDรณnde se refugiรณ la luz del verano, mientras yo, por razones obvias, encendรญa un cigarrillo? El neurรณlogo dice, sin ningรบn รฉnfasis, tal vez retraรญdo: la observaciรณn que acompaรฑa a la polisomnรณgrafรญa nocturna indica que yo, persona sana, vivo una tristeza profunda. ยฟEntiendo esa observaciรณn, incluida en el informe que acompaรฑa a la polisomnรณgrafรญa nocturna? ยฟEs mansa la luz del otoรฑo? ยฟHacia dรณnde huyรณ la luz del verano? ยฟLe digo, al neurรณlogo, que lo que yo deba entender de la observaciรณn que aparece en el informe agregado a la polisomnografรญa nocturna ha dejado de importarme? ยฟLe digo que alguien escribiรณ: la vejez, รบnica enfermedad que me conozco, serรก breve, serรก cruel, ยฟserรก letal? ยฟY que escribiรณ, tambiรฉn, que preferรญa olvidar las diez o doce imรกgenes que conservaba de su infancia? Enciendo otro cigarrillo. El neurรณlogo, las manos cruzadas sobre su escritorio, contempla el cenicero, y dice que no demore mi prรณxima visita, que vuelva cuando yo lo desee. Me pongo de pie, y le pregunto al neurรณlogo si hay alguna otra cosa que yo deba saber. El neurรณlogo que es, casi, un caballero inglรฉs, sea lo que sea un caballero inglรฉs, me abre la puerta de su consultorio. Cuando llego a casa, prendo la luz de una lรกmpara de pie, siento a Tristeza Profunda en la mecedora, y la mecedora se mueve de atrรกs para delante, lenta y en calma, y pasea a Tristeza Profunda por el silencio que ocupa la pieza de paredes pintadas a la cal. ย
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In the Rocking Chair
The neurologist says this: two years ago, he read to me the conclusions of the report added to a nocturnal polysomnograph to which, told him, I reacted disdainful and resigned. The neurologist who looks, to much so, like a British gentleman-something like a polo player, dressed, from his shoulders to his heels, with a white lab coat, and blond, sharp, of middle stature and age and cold and clear eyes- asks me, not very anxious, but fatigued, if I remember something of that lecture. I shrug my shoulders, and I look at his clear and cold eyes, hi s blond hair and the irreproachable knot of his tie. And his devotion for Martin Fierro, of which he made me a participant, on a far-off winter afternoon, when he abandoned, peevish and inscrutable, the celebration of the silences of the pampas. The neurologist said โ and his tone of voice was something stronger than a whisper- that the study made from that night-time polysomnography (the one he gave to me, he repeats, docile and distracted) corresponds to a normal person, except for an observation that he, the neurologist, omitted to mention during my last visit for obvious reasons. I look at the smoke from the cigarette that rises, light and slow, and very white, toward a window through which the afternoon light enters. Is it an autumn light? Gentle?,โ Where did the summer light take refuge, while I, for obvious reasons, lit a cigarette? The neurologist says, without any emphasis, perhaps restrained: the observation that accompanies the nocturnal polysomnography indicates that I, a healthy person, live in a profound sadness. Do I understand that observation, included in the report that accompanies the nocturnal polysomnography? Is the autumn light gentle? Do I say to the neurologist that what I ought to understand from the observation that appears in the report added to the nocturnal polysomnography no longer is important to me? Do I say that someone wrote: old age, the only illness that I know, will be brief, will be cruel, will be lethalโ Amd who also wrote, that he would prefer to forget the ten or twelve images that he has of his childhood? I light another cigarette. I stand up, and I ask the neurologist is if there is anything else I ought to know. The neurologist who is, almost, an English gentleman, whatever an English gentleman may be, opens the door of his office. When I arrive at home, I turn on the light of a standing lamp, I feel the Profound Sadness in the rocking chair, and the rocking chair moves from back to front, slowly and in calmness, andshows the Profound Sadness to the silence that occupies the room with the walls painted with lime.
ESPINOZA, ENRIQUE (seudรณnimo de Samuel Glusberg; 1898โ1987), autor, editor y periodista argentino. Su seudรณnimo combina los nombres de Heinrich Heine y Baruch Spinoza. Nacido en Kishinev, Espinoza llegรณ a la Argentina a los siete aรฑos. Fundรณ y editรณ las revistas literarias Cuadernos Americanos (1919) y Babel (1921-1951), primero en Buenos Aires y luego en Santiago de Chile, donde se instalรณ en 1935 por motivos polรญticos y de salud, y tambiรฉn fundรณ la editorial Babel, que lanzรณ libros de nuevos escritores argentinos. En 1945 realizรณ un simposio sobre “La Cuestiรณn Judรญa” entre destacados intelectuales latinoamericanos, publicado en Babel 26. Fue cofundador y primer secretario de la Asociaciรณn Argentina de Escritores, y miembro de los movimientos de vanguardia en la literatura y el letras. Sus cuentos y artรญculos tratan la identidad judรญa, la inmigraciรณn, el antisemitismo y el Holocausto, asรญ como sobre cuestiones sociales รฉticas y universales. Sus contemporรกneos lo vieron como la mezcla intelectual perfecto de cosmopolitismo y judaรญsmo. Sus cuentos mรกs conocidos aparecieron en La levita gris: cuentos judรญos de ambiente porteรฑo (1924); y Rut y Noemรญ (1934). Sus ensayos se recopilaron en De un lado y del otro (1956), Heine, el รกngel y el leรณn (1953) y Spinoza, รngel y paloma (1978).
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ESPINOZA, ENRIQUE (pseudonym of Samuel Glusberg ; 1898โ1987), Argentine author, publisher, and, journalist. His pseudonym combines the names of Henrich Heine and Baruch Spinoza. Born in Kishinev, Espinoza arrived in Argentina at the age of seven. He founded and edited the literary reviews Cuadernos Americanos (1919) and Babel (1921โ51), first in Buenos Aires and later in Santiago de Chile, where he settled in 1935 for health and political reasons, and also founded the Babel publishing house, which launched books by new Argentinian writers. In 1945 he conducted a symposium on “the Jewish Question” among prominent Latin American intellectuals, published in Babel 26. He was co-founder and first secretary of the Argentine Writers’ Association, and a member of avant-garde movements in literature and the arts. His short stories and articles deal with Jewish identity, immigration, antisemitism, and the Holocaust, as well as ethical and universal social issues. His contemporaries saw him as the perfect intellectual blend of cosmopolitanism and Jewishness. His best-known stories appeared in La levita gris: cuentos judรญos de ambiente porteรฑo (1924); and Ruth y Noemรญ (1934). His essays were collected in De un lado y otro (1956), Heine, el รกngel y el leรณn (1953), and Spinoza, รกngel y paloma (1978).
De:/By: Enrique Espinosa. La levita gris: cuentos de ambiente porteรฑo. Buenos Aires: BABEL, 1924.
El final de este cuento describe “La Semana Trรกgica”, el progrom contra los judรญo y otros obreros en 1919./The end of this story describes the “Tragic Week,” the pogrom against Jews and other workers in 1919.
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“Mate amargo”
A Leopoldo Lugones
El asesinato de su primer varoncito en el pogrom de Kishinev, mรกs el nacimiento anormal de la segunda criatura, a causa de los trastornos durante la matanza sufriรณ la madre, fueron causas harto suficientes para que Abraham Petacรณvsky, dejando su oficio de melamed (preceptor de hebreo), se decidieron a emigrar de Rusia. Dirigiรฉndose en principio a los Estado Unidos (la Amรฉrica por excelencia de los judos de ayer y yanquis de hoy). Pero, ya en Hamburgo, viรณse por razones diplomรกticasโsegรบn bromeรณ despuรฉs-a cambiar de rumbo. Y en los primeros dรญas de noviembre del aรฑo 1905, con su mujer y las dos nenas, a Buenos Aires.
Abraham Petacรณvsky era un judรญo pequeรฑo, simpรกtico, con el aire inteligente y dulce de las personas amables. Sus ojillos claros, amortiguaban hasta la palidez cadavรฉrico, el rostro alargado por una barba irregular y negra. La nariz, de punto estilo hebraico, parecรญa caerse en la boca de gruesos labios irรณnicos. Aunque no contaba mรกs de treinta aรฑos, su aspecto er el de un viejo. Por eso, tal vez, sus parientes de Buenos aires llamรกronlo tรญo Petacovsky, contra la voluntad de Jane Guitel, su esposa, una mujer fidelรญsma, tan devota como fea, pero de mucho orgullo. De tanto, que no obstante haber pasado con el tรญo Patovsky aรฑos difรญciles, lamentaba siempre el tiempo antiguo en nuestra Rusia.Y resignada en sus veintisiete aรฑos escasos, fincaba toda su esperanza en las dos criaturas que habรญan sobrevivido a los horrores del pogrom: Elisa, de siete aรฑos, y Beile, uno apenas.
No se arrepintiรณ el tรญo Petacรณvsky de su arribo a la Argentina. Buenos Aires, la ciudad acerca de la cual habรญa tenido tan peregrinos en el buque, resultรณ muy agrado. Esperรกndolo en el viejo Hotel de Inmigrantes dos cercanos parientes de la mujer y algunos amigos. Gracias a ellos- a quienes ya debรญa parte del pasaje- logrรณ instalarse en seguida bajo techo seguro. Fue una pieza sub-alquilada a cierta familia criolla en el antiguo barrio de Corrales. Para instalarse allรก, tanto el tรญo Petacรณvsky como su mujer tuvieron que dejar al lado escrรบpulos religiosos: resolverse a vivir entre goim.
Jana Guitel, por cierto, resistiรณse un poco.
ยกDios mรญo!, – clamaba ยฟCรณmo voy a cocinar mi pescado relleno junto a la olla con puerco de una cristiana?
Pero cuando vio la cocina de tablas frente a la pieza clavada rente a pieza, como garita de centinela junta a una celda, no tardรณ en conformarse. Y la adaptaciรณn vino rรกpida, por cuanto la facilitaron los dueรฑos de la casa en el respeto a los extraรฑos costumbres de los judรญos, y en el generoso interรฉs por ellos.
La misma discreta curiosidad que los criollos mostraban por la forma rara que la rusa salaba la carne al sol, y el tรญo Petacรณvsky guardaba el sรกbado, lo sentรญan los reciรฉn llegados por las manifestaciones de la vida argentina. De aquรญ que a los pocos dรญas ya todos se entendieron por gestos, Jane Guitel fuera rebautizada con la traducciรณn de Guillermina, por su segundo nombre y el apelativo doรฑa en lugar del primero.
Por su parte, el tรญo Petacรณvsky aprendรญa a tomar mate sin azรบcar, con los hijos de la patrona: dos buenos y honrados muchachos argentinos. Y aunque como gringo legรญtimo, les daba las gracias despuรฉs de cada mate, no suspendรญa hasta el sรฉptimo, pues encontraba el mate sin azรบcar las mismas virtudes estomacales que su mujer atribuรญa al tรฉ con limรณn.
Despuรฉs del mate amargo, las alpargatas criollas constituyeron el descubrimiento mรกs al gusto del tรญo Petacรณvsky. Desde la primera maรฑana que saliรณ a vender cuadros, las encontrรณ insustituibles.
Sin ellas- juraba- jamรกs habrรญa podido con esa endiablado oficio- tan judรญo errante, sin embargo- que le proporcionaron sus parientes.
Las alpargatas criollas y el mate amargo fueron los primeros sรญntomas de la adaptaciรณn del tรญo Petacovsky, pero la prueba definitiva la evidenciรณ dos meses mรกs tarde, concurriendo al entierro del general Mitre. Aquella imponente manifestaciรณn de duelo lo conmoviรณ hasta las lรกgrimas, y durante muchos aรฑos la recordรณ como la expresiรณn mรกs alta de una multitud acongojada por la muerte de un patriarca.
A fuer de israelita piadoso, el tรญo Petacรณvsky sabรญa de grandes hombres y de grandes duelos.
Ya dijimos que el buen hombre comenzรณ su vida de porteรฑo ofreciendo cuadros por las calles de Buenos Aires. Pero no sabemos si el lector por haber visto alguna vez una figura de talmudista metido entre dos parejas de estampas evangรฉlicas sospechรณ que nos referimos a cuadros religiosos. Sin embargo, la cosa, ademรกs de pintoresca, es importante y hasta tiene su historia.
Vender estampas de santos, era en 1906 un negocio reciรฉn iniciado por los judรญos de Buenos Aires. Hasta entonces, los israelitas que no vinieron para trabajar en las colonias agrรญcolas de Entre Rรญos o Santa Fe, se dedicaron a vender a plazos: muebles, joyas, trajes, pielesโฆ Todo, menos cuadros. El tรญo Petacรณvsky fue tal vez el nรบmero uno de los que salieron a vender estampas a plazos. Y es cierto que no resultรณ que el mรกs afortunado (no hay ahora ninguna marca de cuadros Petacรณvsky) fue en su tiempo mรกs el mรกs eficaz.
Dueรฑo de un innato gusto eclesiรกstico, el tรญo Petacvsky sabรญa recomendar sus lรกminas. En su rara lengua judaica-criolla hallaba el modo de hacer en pocas palabras el elogio de cualquiera. Unas, por el tenue azul de sus ojos de una virgen; otras, por el gesto derrotado de un apรณstol. A cada cual por lo mรกs impresionanteโฆ
Nadie come el tรญo Petacoรณvsky para explicar las virtudes de un San Juan Evangelista. Equivocaba, tal vez, desmemoriado, un San Josรฉ con un san Antonio. Pero jamรกs olvidaba seรฑalar un detalle del color, un rasgo patรฉtico capaz de entusiasmar a una Marรญa.
De lo que se lamentaba con frecuencia era de la escasez de su lรฉxico. A cada instante veรญase obligado a juegos de mรญmica moviendo manos, cara y hombros a un mismo tiempoโฆ con todo, sus ventas nunca fracasaron porque no lo entendieran o porque รฉl extendiera los recibos con nombres de Josefa o Magdalena, en caracteres hebraicos, sino por falta de religiosidad de las gentes.
รl, que era tan profundamente religioso hasta cumplir- no obstante, su oficio- con las oraciones cotidianas y el sรกbado sagrado, no se explicaba cรณmo habiendo tantas iglesias en Buenos Aires, eran tan pocos los creyentes. Por eso, cuando a fuerza de recorrer la ciudad, comprobรณ que en la Boca era donde se congregaba mayor nรบmero de fieles, tratรณ de formar su clientela entre ellos. Y, en efecto, le fue mejor.
Despuรฉs de trabajar un aรฑo junto al Riachuelo, saliendo a vender casi todos los dรญas menos los sรกbados y los domingos- el tรญo Petacรณvsky pudo crear su clientela y dedicarse solo a la cobranza y entrega de los cuadros que le encargaban directamente. Entonces saldรณ las deudas con sus parientes, obtuvo otra pieza en la misma casa de la calle Caseros, y planteรณ el negocio por realizar con los hijos de la patrona: negocio que consistรญa en asociarse a ellos para armar los marcos de las estampas y confeccionar los cuadros por cuenta propia.
Todo pudo realizarse al espรญritu emprendedor del tรญo Petacรณvsky. Los dos muchachos criollos, que no fueron desde niรฑos otra cosa que jornaleros en una carpinterรญa mecรกnica, viรฉronse convertidos en pequeรฑos industriales. Entretanto, el tรญo Petacรณvsky dejรณ de ser vendedor ambulante, para dirigir el taller.
A su nombre, o mรกs bien a nombre de la fรกbrica de cuadros Petacรณvsky-Bermรบdez, trabajaban varios corredores judรญos. Ademรกs, muchos otros, colegas del devoto oficio, compraban allรญ sus cuadras para difundir por toda la Repรบblica.
Cerca de tres aรฑos trabajaron los hermanos Bermรบdez en sociedad con el tรญo Petacรณvsky. Como fuera bien desde un principio, lo hacรญan con gusto y sin honorario determinado. A las seis de la maรฑana ya estaban los tres en el taller, y se desayunan con amargos y galleta. Luego, mientras los mozos preparaban las estampas encargadas, el tรญo Petacรณvsky, que ya borroneaba en castellano, hacรญa las facturas y tomaba nota de las lรกminas que era necesario llevar al centro.
A la venta de estampas evangรฉlicas los fabricantes habรญan agregado, siempre por la iniciativa del tรญo Petacรณvsky, marinas, paisajes, frutasโฆ y, en gran cantidad escenas del teatro shakesperiano: Otelo, Hamlet, Romeo y Julietaโฆ A las ocho, cuando doรฑa Guillermina, o Jane Guitel, despachaba a Elisa para la escuela, el tรญo Petacรณvsky รญbase de compras en el centro. A pesar de que lo hacรญa casi todas las maรฑanas, los hermanos Bermรบdez nunca dejaban de bromear en las despedidas.
-Tรญo Petaca- le gritaban, no olvide de traerme una paisanita, y prefiero rubia, ยฟeh?… Tรญo Petacaโฆ
Pero el aludido no se enojaba. Con una comisura de ironรญa y superioridad en los labios, contestaba: -Estรก boino, pero no olviden los noive San Antonios para San Pedro.
Y salรญa riรฉndose, mientras los mozos, remedรกndole, gritaban:
Cabayo bien, Tรญo Petarcaโฆ
A Jane Guitel, desde luego, no le agradaban estas bromas. Cada maรฑana las oรญa y cada noche se las reprochaba al marido, rogรกndole que se mudaran antes de evitar โtanta confianzaโ.
-Una cosa- protestaba la mujer- es el comercio y otra la amistad. No me gusta que tengas tanta confianza con ellos. ยฟAcaso han fumado ustedes en la misma pipa?…
En realidad, lo que Jane Guitel concluรญa preguntando a su marido no era precisamente si habรญa fumado en la misma pipa con sus socios, sino muy otra cosa. Pero, a quรฉ repetirloโฆ Lo que molestaba a la mujer, sobre todo, era que los Bermรบdez llamaron Tรญo Petaca a su marido. Desde que Elisa iba al colegio, doรฑa Guillermina averiguaba por ella el significado de cualquier palabra. Y aunque la chiquilla solo cursaba el tercer grado, sabรญa ya expresarse correctamente en castellano, hasta el punto de no querer hablar el idish no con su propia madre.
Pasaron, no obstante, dos aรฑos mรกs. Por fin, a principios de 1910, Jane Guitel pudo realizar su propuesto de abandonar la calle Caseros. Una vez en claro el balance definitivo, la sociedad Petacรณvsky-Bermรบdez quedรณ disuelta, sin que por ello los socios quebraban su amistad. Despuรฉs de tres aรฑos, cada uno se retiraba con cerca de diez mil pesos. Los hermanos, con sus partes, decidieron reconstruir la vieja casa familiar y establecer en ella una carpinterรญa mecรกnica. Mientras el tรญp Petacรณvsky, qua a cambio de su parte de la maquinaria conservaba un resto de la antigua clientela boquense, instalรกbase en una cรณmoda casa de la calle Almirante Brown.
Sabido es: de cien judรญos que llegan a juntar algunos miles de pesos, noventa y nueve gustan instalarse como verdaderos ricos. De ahรญ que el tรญo Petacรณvsky, que no era la excepciรณn, comprara piano a la pequeรฑa Elisa, y con motivo del nacimiento de un hijo argentino, celebrara la circuncisiรณn en una digna fiesta a la manera clรกsica. Era justo. Desde el asesinato de primogรฉnito, en Rusia, el tรญo Petacรณvsky esperaba tamaรฑo acontecimiento.
Igual que Jane Guitle, รฉl habรญa soรฑado siempre un hijo varรณn que a su muerte dijera el Kรกdish de recuerdo, esa noble oraciรณn del huรฉrfano judรญo, que el mismo Enrique Heine recordaba en su tumba de lana.
Nadie ha de cantarme musa
Nadie โkรกdishโ me dirรก
Sin cantos y sin plegarias
Mi aniversario fatalโฆ
Pero dejemos la poesรญa y los poetas. No por tener kรกdish, [1]el tรญo Petacรณvsky
echรณse muerto. Al contrario, el feliz avenimiento en vรญsperas del centenario de 1819, le sugiriรณ un negocio patriรณtico. Y con la misma fe y el mismo entusiasmo que el anterior, el tรญo Petacรณvsky lo llevรณ a tรฉrmino. Tratรกbase en realidad del mismo negocio, Sรณlo que ahora en vea de estampas de santos, serรญan relatos de hรฉroes, y en lugar de escenas shakesperianas, alegorรญas patriรณticas.
Los hermanos Bermรบdez, que seguiรกn siendo sus amigos, lo informaron acerca de la historia patria, pero con un criterio de federales que el tรญo sospechรณ lleno de parcialidad. No era que รฉl estuviese en contra de nadie, sino que le faltaban pruebas de la gloria de Rosasโฆ
Como bien andariego, el tรญo Petacรณvsky habรญa aprendido su historia nacional en las calles de Buenos Aires. Asรญ juzgaba como hรฉroes de primera fila a todos que daban nombres a todos aquellos que daban nombres a las calles y las plazas principales. Y si bien este curioso entendimiento de aprender habรญa sido ya metodizado por los pedagogistas, รฉl, que allรก en Rusia, fuera pedagogo en el original sentido de la palabra, lo ignoraba sabiamente. No por ignorar su denominaciรณn cientรญfica: visoaudmotor, (perdรณn), el metido diรณle mejor resultado. Respeto de Sarmiento- verbigratia domine– que entonces prestaba su nombre glorioso a una humilde callejuela de la Boca, el tรญo Petacรณvsky habรญase formado un concepto pobrรญsimo. Y no de ser escritor -ยฟQuรฉ judรญo no admira a un hombre que escribiรณ libros?- habรญa privado su colecciรณn de una figura tribunicia.
Por suerte, esta falla inefable mรฉtodo lo salvรณ de la corriente pedagรณgica. Al no dar tampoco, en lugar visible, en el monumento a Rivadavia, resolviรณ no guiarse por el sentido didรกcticoโฆ y comprar ejemplos ilustrados de todos los patriotas. Aquellos que conocรญa y aquellos que no conocรญa. Y todo quedรณ resuelto.
[1] Por extension, los judรญos llaman asรญ a sus hijos varones.
Antes del primero de mayo- dรญa seรฑalado para inaugura su nuevo comercio, el tรญo Petacรณvsky descargaba en su casa cerca de un millรณn de lรกminas entre estampas para cuadros, retratos, alegorรญas patriรณticas, copias de monumentos y tarjetas postales. Varios viajantes se encargaron de las provincias y el tรญo Petacรณvsky de la capital. Durante seis meses las cosas anduvieron a todo trapo. Mas, no obstante, esa actividad y las proporciones que alcanzaban las fiestas de centenario en toda la Repรบblica, el negocio fracasรณ.
Cuando a fines de 1910- hechas las liquidaciones en el interior del paรญs- realizรณ el recuento de la mercaderรญa sobrante, aprendieron mรกs de seiscientas mil cartulinas. En resumen: habรญa perdido en una aventura de seis meses sus ganancias de cinco aรฑos.
Naturalmente, este primer fracaso enturbiรณ el humor del tรญo Petacรณvsky . Como en verdad no tenรญa pasta de comerciante, se sintiรณ derrotado. Y si bien a los pocos meses ya soรฑaba otro negocio a propรณsito del Carnaval, sus parientes, entre burlas, negรกndole crรฉdito para realizarse. ยฟQuiรฉn no desconfรญa del hombre que fracasรณ una vez?
En esa desconfianza, mรกs que en la pรฉrdida de su dinero, sintiรณ el tรญo Petacรณvsky su desgracia. Para ayudarse, sin recurrir a nadie, mudรณse a una casa mรกs econรณmica, vendiรณ el piano y aplazรณ el ingreso de su hija en la Escuela Normal. Pero nada de esto fue remedio. Sรณlo una nueva desgracio- ยฟvendrรกn por eso seguidasโ โ le cur del anterior. Fue nada menos que la muerte de Beile, la menor de las hijitas.
Este lamentable suceso hizo tambiรฉn olvidar a sus relaciones el fracaso del centenario. Por una parte, de sus parientes, y por otra los amigos, con esa solidaridad en el dolor tan caracterรญsticos de los judรญos, compitieron en ayudar al infeliz. Y otra vez gracias a ellos el tรญo Petacรณvsky pudo volver a su oficio de corredor. Ahora ya no solo de cuadros, sino tambiรฉn de muebles, telas, joyas, pielesโฆ
Durante cinco nuevos aรฑos, el tรญo Petacรณvsky trabajรณ para rehacer su clientela. Canas costรกbale ya el maldito oficio, venido a menos por la competencia de las grandes tiendas y alza enorme los precios con motivo de la guerra.
Pero hasta mediar el aรฑo 1916 no pudo abandonarlo. Sรณlo entonces, una circunstancia lo sacรณ de รฉl. El caso puede resumirse de esta manera:
El menor de los hermanos Bermรบdez, Carlos, lo recomendรณ al gerente de una fรกbrica de cigarrillos, y รฉste adquirรณle, como objetos de propaganda para el centenario para el centenario de la Independencia, el sobrante de estampas patriรณticas.
Mil quinientos pesos recibiรณ el tรญo Petacรณvsky por sus lรกminas. Con ese dinero en el bolsillo sintiรณse optimista. En seguida liquidรณ su clientela- ya padecรญa el reumatismo- y se puso a la tarea de buscar un negocio en el centro. El quid era un comercio con puerta a la calle. Que los clientes lo fueron a buscar a รฉl. No al revรฉs, como hasta entonces. Ya le asqueaba hacer el marchante.
De nuevo burlรกndose los parientes de sus proyectos. Mientras uno, aludiendo a su aficiรณn por el mate, lo aconsejaban una plantaciรณn de yerba en Misiones, otros le sugerรญan una fรกbrica de matesโฆ
Mas el tรญo Petachรณvsky, contra el parecer de todos en general, y de Jane Guitel en particular, comprรณ una pequeรฑa librerรญa cerca de Mercado de Abasto.
Con el nuevo negocio, la vida del tรญo Petacรณvsky se transformรณ por completo. Ya no recorrรญa la ciudad. Vestido a gusto, con amplio guardapolvo de brin, y tocado con oscuro solideo, pasรกbase las maรฑanas leyendo y mateando junto al mostrador, a espera de clientes. Elisa, su hija, que ya estaba hecha una simpรกtica criollita de dieciocho aรฑos, le cebaba el amargo por intermedio de Daniel; mientras arreglaba la casa antes de que Jane Guitel volviera del mercado.
Despuรฉs del almuerzo, el tรญo Petacรณvsky hacรญa su siesta. A las cuatro ya estaba otra vez en su puesto y Elisa volvรญa a cebarle mate hasta la noche.
Ahora bien: de rendir la venta diaria un poco mรกs dinero que el indispensable para el pan y la yerba, es posible que todos vivieran tranquilos. Pero como despuรฉs de un aรฑo ilusiones, se vio que esto no acaecรญa, las disputas renovaron.
-De no querer tรบ โ increpรกbale Jan Guitle- reformar el mundo y hacer que tantos israelitas hacen en Buenos Aires, estarรญamos bien.
A lo que el hombre contestaba:
-Es que cuando a uno no le va, todo es inรบtil.
Y si Jane Guitel lo instaba a vender del tenducho, el reargรผรญa con agrio humor:
-Seguro estoy que de meterme a fabricar mortajas, la gente dejarรญa de morirse. ยกEs lo mismo!
Tales discusiones reproduciรฉndose en el mismo tono, casi todos los dรญas. Desde la muerte de su hijita, Jane Guitel estaba enferma y frecuentes crises de nervios le debilitaban. El tรญo Petacรณvsky, al tanto de ella, trataba siempre de calmarla con alguna ocurrencia. Y si doรฑa Guillermina, como la llamaba por broma en esas ocasiones, se resistรญa, รฉl invocaba los aforismos de Scholem Aleijem, su escritor predilecto: โReรญr es saludable, los mรฉdicos aconsejan reรญrse, o โCuando tengas la olla vacรญa, llรฉnala de risaโ.
Pero lo cierto es que a pesar de Scholem Aleijem, el tรญo Petacรณvsky se habรญa contagiado de la tristeza de su mujer. Ya no era el alegre tรญo Petaca de la fรกbrica de cuadros. Nada le quedaba del entusiasmo y del humor de aquella รฉpoca. Si aรบn reรญa, era para esconder sus lรกgrimasโฆ Porque como รฉl mismo decรญa: โCuando los negocios van mal, se puede ser humorista, pero nunca profetaโ. Y รฉl ya no trataba en serio de nada.
Habรญa ensayado, al reabrirse las escuelas, la compra y venta de libros viejos, con algรบn resultado. Pero al llegar las vacaciones- ya conocido como cambalachero- nadie entraba sino para vender libros usados.
En tanto los dรญas pasaban monรณtonos, aburridos, iguales. El hombre, siembre con su amargo y los libros, y la mujer con su eterna loa del tiempo antiguo y su constante protesta contra el actual.
ยกDios mรญo! – se quejaba al marido- ยกlo que has llegado a ser en Amรฉrica: un cambalachero! – Y lloraba.
En vano, el tรญo Petacรณvsky intentaba defender la condiciรณn intelectual de su oficio y fingir grandes esperanzas para la temporada prรณxima.
-Y verรกs- le decรญa- cuando empiezan las clases, cรณmo van a salir todos estos grandes sabios y poetas. Entonces hasta es probable que encuentre un comprador de todo el negocio, y me quedo solo con los textos de medicina para que mรกs trade Daniel estudie de doctor.
La mujer no dejaba de mortificarlo. Menos soรฑadora que รฉl, calculaba el porvenir de su hija. Y en momentos de amargura, los insultos estallaban en su boca: ยกCambalachero!… ยกCambalachero!… ยกDios mรญo!, quiรฉn se casarรก con la hija de un cambalachero!…
Primero, un chisme en la familia la enterรณ de que Elisa era festejada por Carlos Bermรบdez. No quiso creerlo. Luego, alguien que los vio juntos, le confirmรณ el chisme. Y vinieron las primeras sospechas. Por รบltimo, la misma chica instada por la sinceridad del padre, confesรณ sus relaciones con el ex-socio… Y aquรญ fue la ruina de Jerusalemโฆ Jane Guitel puso el grito en el cielo. ยฟCรณmo una hija suya iba a casarse con un goi? ยฟPodrรญa olvidar, acaso, la ingrata, que un bisabuelo de ellos (Dios lo tenga en la gloria) fue gran rabino en Kishinev, y que todos sus parientes fueron santos y puros judรญos? ยฟDรณnde habรญa dejado la vergรผenza esa muchacha?…
Y, en su desesperaciรณn, acusaba de todo, por milรฉsima vez, a su marido y sus negocios.
Ahรญ tienes a tus grandes amigos de mate (ยกDios quiera envenenarlos!) Ahรญ estรกn las consecuencias de tus negocios con ellos (ยกUn rayo los fulmine!) Todo por culpa tuyaโฆ
Y, vencido por los nervios, se echaba a llorar como en Iom Kipur- el dรญa del perdรณn.
A todo esto, el tรญo Petacรณvsky, que a pesar del mate no habรญa dejado de ser un buen judรญo, la calmaba, asegurรกndole que Dios mediante, el casamiento no llegarรญa realizarse.
Aunque por otras razones, รฉl tambiรฉn era contrario al matrimonio de Elisa con Bermรบdez. Sostenรญa al respeto a la antigua fรณrmula de nacionalistas: โNo podemos dejar de ser judรญos mientras los otros no dejen de ser cristianosโฆโ y como en verdad ni รฉl se creรญa un hombre libre, ni tenรญa por tal a Bermรบdez, hacรญa lo posible por inculcar a Elisa su filosofรญa
Mira โ le decรญa una tarde mientras la muchacha le cebaba mate โ Si te
prohรญbo el casamiento con Carlos, no es por capricho. Tรบ sabes cuรกnto lo aprecio. Pero ustedes son distintos: han nacidos en paรญses opuestos, han recibido diversa educaciรณn, han rezado a distintos dioses, tienen desiguales recuerdos. En resumen: ni รฉl ha dejado de ser cristiano, ni tu judรญa.
Otra vez agregaba:
-Es imposible. No se van a entender. En la primera pelea- y son
inevitables las primeras peleas- te juro que tรบ le gritarรกs cabeza de goi, y รฉl, a manera de insulto, te llamarรก judรญaโฆ Y puede que hasta se burle de cรณmo tu padre dice โnoiveโ.
Mas, tan inรบtiles fueron las sinceras razones del tรญo Petacรณvsky como los desmayos frecuentes de Jane Guitel. La muchacha, ganada por amor, huyรณ a los pocos meses con su novio a Rosario.
La fuga de Elisa acabรณ por romper los nervios de la madre. Dos semanas se pasรณ llorando, casi sin probar alimento. Nada ni nadie pudo tranquilizarla. Al fin, por consejo mรฉdico, tuvieron que internarla en el San Roque donde al poco tiempo morรญa, acrecentando el escรกndalo que la escapada produjo en la colectividad.
Con la muerte de Jane Guitel, la muchacha volviรณ al hogar. Y tras de ella vino Bermรบdez. Como si los dos fueran los causantes directos de esa muerte, lloraron lรกgrimas amargas sobre la tumba de la pobre mujer
El mismo Bermรบdez, antes tan inflexible, renunciaba a Elisa y consentรญa que ella se quedara del hermanito. Pero el tรญo Petacรณvsky tuvo la honradez de perdonarlos y autorizar el casamiento a condiciรณn de que vivieran felices y para siempre en Rosario.
Despuรฉs de hacerles notar a quรฉ precio habรญan conseguido la uniรณn, el tรญo Petacรณvsky, contra el parecer de todos, resolviรณ seguir en su cambalache solo con su Daniel.
-Yo mismo โ dijo, me encargarรฉ de hacerlo hombre. Pierdan cuidado, no nos moriremos de hambre.
Y no hubo manera de disuadirlo.
Abandonado durante tantos meses, el negocio se habรญa convertido del todo en un boliche de viejo, sin otra mercaderรญa que libros y folletos espaรฑoles que se ven en todos los cambalaches. Pero Jane Guitel ya no podรญa manifestar escrรบpulos, y Elisa estaba casada y lejos, el tรญo Petacรณvsky se dedicรณ de lleno a sus librotes, dispuesto a ganarse el pan para su hijo. Ya no vivรญa sino por รฉl y para รฉl. Todas las maรฑanas se levantaba temprano y despuรฉs de preparar el mate, despertaba a Daniel. Ambos desayunรกbanse y en seguida iban a la sinagoga, donde el chico decรญa kรกdish en memoria de la madre. A las ocho, ya estaban las dos en la acera de la escuela, mientras Daniel entraba a su clase, el tรญo Petacรณvsky se volviรณ a abrir el boliche, que ya no cerraba hasta la noche. Y asรญ lograron mantenerse durante seis largos meses.
Cuando las vacaciones escolares el mismo tenducho dejรณ de producir para las reducidas necesidades de la casa, el tรญo Petacvsky reuniรณ uno cuantos muchachos judรญos para enseรฑarles el hebreo. De esa manera, con la vuelta a su primitivo oficio, afrontรณ la penosa situaciรณn. Y a cualquier otro sacrificio estaba dispuesto, con tal de ver algรบn dรญa hecho hombre a su Daniel.
Corrรญan los primeros dรญas del aรฑo 1919. Una gran huelga de metalรบrgicos habรญase generalizado en Buenos Aires y las noticias mรกs inverosรญmiles acerca de una revoluciรณn maximalista, propagรกndose de un extremo a otro de la ciudad. De la ciudad. La tarde del 10 se enero, el tรญo Petacรณvsky estaba como siempre, sentado junto a sus libros, tomando mate. Habรญa despachado a los chicos temprano, por se vรญspera de sรกbado, y porque en el barrio reinaba cierta intranquilidad.
La calle Corrientes, tan concurrida siempre, ofrecรญa un aspecto extraรฑo, debido a la interrupciรณn del trรกfico y a la presencia de gendarmes armados a mรกuser.
A eso de las ocho y media, un grupo de jรณvenes bien vestidos hizo interrupciรณn en la acera del boliche, vitoreando a la patria. Atraรญdo por los gritos, el tรญo Petacรณvsky, que seguรญa tomando mate, asomรณ la cara detrรกs de la vidriera, todo temeroso, porque, hacia un momento, Daniel habรญa salido a decir su kรกdish.
Uno del grupo, que divisรณ el rostro amedrentado del tรญo Petacรณvsky , llamรณ la atenciรณn de todos sobre el boliche, los mozos detuvironse frente a; escaparate.
-ยกLibros maximalistas! – seรฑalรณ a gritos el mรกs prรณximo. ยกLibros maximalistas!
Ahรญ estรก el ruso detrรกs โ objetรณ otro.
-ยกQuรฉ hipocrata, con mate, para despistar!…
Y un tercero:
-Pero le vamos a dar libros de โchivosโโฆ
Y, adelantรกndose, disparรณ su revolver contra las barbas de un Tolstoi que aparecรญa en la cubierta de un volumen rojo. Los acompaรฑantes, espoleados por el ejemplo, lo imitaron. En un momento cayeron, todos los libros de autores barbudos que habรญa en el escaparate. Y en verdad, la puntera de los jรณvenes habrรญa sido cรณmico, de no faltar una vez y costarle con eso la vida del tรญo Petacรณvsky.
Ahora el buen hombre debe hallarse en el cielo, junto a los santos, hรฉroes y artistas que por su industria hicieron soรฑar a tanta gente en Buenos Aires. Y es cierto que la divina justicia es menos lenta y mรกs segura que la humana, ella de concederle, como a los elegidos, una gracia a su elecciรณn. Entonces. Buen seguro, como aquel Bonchi calla de I. L, Peretz (poetizado en el idioma de Maupassant en Bonchi el silencieux– que en circunstancias idรฉnticas pidiera a los รกngeles pan con manteca- el tรญo Petacรณvsky les ha de pedirles mate amargo para la eternidad.
Reina Roffe es narradora y ensayista argentina nacida en Buenos Aires de padres sefardรญes. Ha sido distinguida con la beca Fulbright y con la Antorchas de Literatura. Recibiรณ el primer galardรณn en el concurso Pondal Rรญos por su primera obra, y el Premio Internacional de Novela Corta otorgado por la Municipalidad de San Francisco, Argentina. En Italia, han aparecido los libros Lโonda che si infrange y Uccelli rari ed esotici, Cinque racconti di donne straordinarie y en Estados Unidos el volumen que agrupa The Reef y Exotic Birds. Numerosas antologรญas europeas y estadounidenses albergan cuentos suyos. Su obra incluye las novelas Llamado al Puf, Monte de Venus, La rompiente, El cielo dividido, El otro amor de Federico. Lorca en Buenos Aires y el libro de relatos Aves exรณticas. Cinco cuentos con mujeres raras.Entre otros ensayos, ha publicado Juan Rulfo: Autobiografรญa armada (Corregidor, 1973; Montesinos, 1992) y el libro de entrevistas Conversaciones americanas. Es autora de la biografรญa Juan Rulfo. Las maรฑas del zorro (Espasa, 2003) y de Juan Rulfo: Biografรญa no autorizada(Fรณrcola, 2012), con prรณlogo de Blas Matamoro.
DE: Omnibus, no. 48
Reina Roffe is an Argentinian narrator and essayist born in Buenos Aires to Sephardic parents. She has been honored by a Fulbright scholarship and with the Antorchas de Literatura. She received first prize in the Pondal Rรญos contest for his first work, and the International Short Novel Award granted by the Municipality of San Francisco, Argentina. In Italy, the books L’onda che si infrange and Uccelli rare ed esotici, Cinque racconti di donne straordinarie have appeared, and in the United States the volume that groups The Reef and Exotic Birds. Numerous European and American anthologies contain his short stories. His work includes the novels Llamado al Puf, Monte de Venus, La rompiente, El cielo dividido, El otro amor de Federico. Lorca in Buenos Aires and the book of stories Aves exรณticas, that include five stories with rare women. Among other essays, he has published Juan Rulfo: Armed Autobiography (Corregidor, 1973; Montesinos, 1992) and the interview book American Conversations. She is the author of the biography Juan Rulfo. The Tricks of the Fox (Espasa, 2003) and Juan Rulfo: Unauthorized biography (Fรณrcola, 2012), with a prologue by Blas Matamoro.
En el viento, al pasar, la caricia que vaga sin destino ni objeto,
la caricia perdida ยฟquiรฉn la recogerรก?
La caricia perdida.
Alfonsina Storni.
Tres veces al dรญa, y no dos, me ocupo de aliviar mi enfermedad. El oftalmรณlogo me habรญa dicho: โPor la maรฑana y por la noche lรญmpiese los ojos, pรกrpado superior e inferiorโ. Antes de irme, le preguntรฉ: ยฟDe dรณnde es usted?, ya que รฉl no me preguntaba de dรณnde era yo; โDe Siriaโ, respondiรณ con su acento รกrabe en la Espaรฑa ya babรฉlica en la que vivimos extranjeros de 2 diferentes procedencias. Y me diagnosticรณ conjuntivitis crรณnica. Todo lo que ahora tengo es crรณnico: gastritis crรณnica, conjuntivitis crรณnica… soy una clรณnica del dolor y la enfermedad. โLa higiene ocular es muy importante. Cada dรญa se limpia usted los pรกrpados y pestaรฑas para quitar cualquier resto de legaรฑas con toallitas especiales. Aquรญ le pongo el nombreโ, y anotรณ. โO bienโ, dijo, โpuede usar un gel que tambiรฉn es para lo mismo. Pongo todo en la receta. Hasta aquรญ instrucciones sobre la higiene ocular externa. Para la interna, se echa en cada ojo soluciรณn fisiolรณgica. Esto que le digo, siempre. Y para evitar orzuelos se aplica, durante una semana, esta pomada que le indico aquรญโ. รl aprendiรณ a decir โlegaรฑaโ, le fue mรกs fรกcil que a mรญ, precisamente porque su lengua nativa no es el castellano; yo no me acostumbro. Espontรกneamente me sale lagaรฑa, como lo he dicho toda mi vida en la Argentina de mi infancia. Eso habรญa dicho el oculista, con sus tropiezos y su acento voluptuoso como salido de las Mil y una noches de amor: Para siempre, todos los dรญas, varias veces al dรญa, cuidar mucho la higiene de los ojos. Palabras como maceradas en una bola de hierbas aromรกticas, sonaban envolventes, arrulladoras. Pero, inmediatamente, volviรณ a mis oรญdos esa fea palabra, crรณnica, que no se referรญa a un relato de sucesos ni de testimonios, sino a lo que me he ido convirtiendo: una mujer que padece enfermedades de larga duraciรณn y las arrastra de dรฉcada en dรฉcada, un lastre crรณnico. Ayer tenรญa arena en los ojos, muy rojo por dentro, una gran molestia y leรญa cualquier cosa. Cualquier cosa leo desde que tengo presbicia; โPara que entiendaโ, me habรญa dicho otro oculista como si yo no fuera capaz de entender, โlo que usted tiene es vista cansadaโ. Y problemas de visiรณn: de cerca, de media, de larga distancia. Ahora ya de todas las distancias. Al pasar por el quiosco de periรณdicos, leรญ un titular: โTemporada de insectos aplastados en el paraรญsoโ. Quedรฉ perpleja. Volvรญ sobre mis pasos. Decรญa: โTรฉmpora de insectos aplastados en el parabrisasโ. Me reรญ como una loca. Mamรก tambiรฉn se reรญa sola, a veces. Tendrรญa mi edad, quizรกs incluso algunos aรฑos menos que yo ahora, cuando empezรณ a tener estas irregularidades o faltas. En nosotras, todo se transforma en irregular y deriva en faltas o fallos. No le alcanzaban los brazos para alejar la revista y siempre recurrรญa a quien tuviera mรกs a mano, con la finalidad de que le prestara el servicio de sus ojos y le leyera la letra pequeรฑa, fuese en los envases de productos alimenticios o en prospectos, esas cosas aberrantes para la vista cansada. A mรญ me fastidiaba verla abrir los ojos, como si por abrirlos, pudiera ampliar su visiรณn. Tantas cosas que critiquรฉ en ella. Casi las mismas criticables en mรญ ahora. No escupas al cielo, te caerรก en la cara. Tres veces, no dos, me limpio los ojos. Ya no siento la arena del desierto en ellos, y parece que, por esta vez, el orzuelo no brotarรก. Y la caricia perdida, rodarรก… rodarรก… Pues maรฑana, seรฑor oculista sirio, esto habrรก pasado un poco, nunca del todo porque es crรณnico, ya sabemos, y no tendrรฉ que volver a su consulta. La caricia sazonada con hierbas aromรกticas de sus palabras, ยฟquiรฉn la recoger?
In the wind, as it passes, the caress that wanders without destination or purpose,
the lost caress, who will pick it up?
The lost caress.
Alfonsina Storni.
Three times a day, and not twice, I take care of alleviating my illness. The ophthalmologist had told me: “In the morning and at night, wipe your eyes, upper and lower eyelids.” Before leaving, I asked him: Where are you from?, since he did not ask me where I was from; โFrom Syriaโ, he responded with his Arabic accent in the already Babbelic Spain in which foreigners from different origins live. And he diagnosed me with chronic conjunctivitis. Everything I now have is chronic: chronic gastritis, chronic conjunctivitis… I am a clone of pain and disease. โEye hygiene is very important. Every day you clean your eyelids and eyelashes to remove any remaining rheum with special wipes. Here I put the name “, and scored. โOr,โ he said, โyou can use a gel that’s also for the same thing. I put everything in the recipe. So far instructions on external eye hygiene. For the internal one, physiological solution is poured into each eye. This I tell you, always. And to avoid styes, this ointment that I indicate here is applied for a week. He learned to say โlegaรฑaโ, it was easier for him than for me, precisely because his native language is not Spanish; I don’t get used to it. Lagaรฑa comes out spontaneously, as I have said all my life in the Argentina of my childhood. That’s what the eye doctor had said, with his stumbling blocks and his voluptuous accent as if he had come out of the Thousand and One Nights of Love: Forever, every day, several times a day, take great care of eye hygiene. Words like macerated in a ball of aromatic herbs, sounded enveloping, lulling. But, immediately, that ugly word, chronicle, returned to my ears, which did not refer to an account of events or testimonies, but to what I have gradually become: a woman who suffers from long-term illnesses and drags them from decade to decade. decade, a chronic burden. Yesterday he had sand in his eyes, very red inside, a great nuisance and he would read anything. Anything I read since I have presbyopia; โSo that you understand,โ another eye doctor had told me as if I were not capable of understanding, โwhat you have is tired eyesightโ. And vision problems: close, medium, long distance. Now from all distances. Passing the newsstand, I read a headline: “Squashed Bug Season in Paradise.” I was perplexed. I retraced my steps. It read: “Squashed Insect Season On Windshield.” I laughed like crazy. Mom laughed to herself, too, sometimes. He would have been my age, perhaps even a few years younger than me now, when he began to have these irregularities or faults. In us, everything becomes irregular and leads to faults or failures. Her arms did not reach her to move the magazine away and she always resorted to whoever was closest to hand, in order to have them serve her eyes and read the fine print, whether it was on the packaging of food products or on brochures, those aberrant things for the tired eye. It annoyed me to see her open her eyes, as if by opening them, she could expand her vision. So many things that I criticized in it. Almost the same critics in me now. Don’t spit at the sky, it will fall on your face. Three times, not twice, I wipe my eyes. I no longer feel the desert sand on them, and it seems that this time the stye will not break out. And the lost caress, it will roll… it will roll… Well tomorrow, Mr. Syrian oculist, this will have passed a bit, never completely because it is chronic, we already know, and I won’t have to go back to your office. The caress seasoned with aromatic herbs of his words, who will pick it up?
Carolina Esses naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1974. Poeta, novelista y Licenciada en Letras (UBA). Publicรณ las novelas La melancolรญa de los perros (Bajo la luna, 2020) y Un buen judรญo (Bajo la luna, 2017), los poemarios Versiones del paraรญso (Del Dock, 2016) y Temporada de invierno (Bajo la luna, 2009, en versiรณn en inglรฉs de Allison De Freese Entre Rรญos Books, Seattle). Sus poemas han sido traducidos al inglรฉs y al francรฉs en diferentes antologรญas. Tambiรฉn es autora de literatura infantil. Durante varios aรฑos colaborรณ โโcon la revista ร y ahora reseรฑa libros en el suplemento “ideas” de La Naciรณn. Desde 2007 trabaja para las Bibliotecas Municipales.
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Carolina Esses was born in Buenos Aires in 1974. Poet, novelist and Bachelor of Letters (UBA). she published the novels La melancolรญa de los perros (Bajo la luna, 2020) Un buen judรญo (Bajo la luna, 2017), the poetry books Versiones del paraรญso (Del Dock, 2016) and Temporada de invierno (Bajo la luna, 2009 , in English version by Allison De Freese Entre Rรญos Books, Seattle,. Her poems have been translated into English and French in different anthologies. She is also the author of children’s literature. For several years she collaborated with the magazine ร and now reviews books in the “ideas” supplement of La Naciรณn. Since 2007 she has been working for the City Libraries.
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De: Carolina Esses. Un buen judรญo. Buenos Aires: Bajo la luna, 1917. pp. 57-66.
Natalia ama a los Halim. Entre ellos no tiene que decir ninguna frase polรญticamente correcta, no tiene que hacer como fuese lo mismo respetar o no el Shabat. Porque si bien en el dรญa a dรญa se ocupa de mostrar su faceta mรกs moderada dentro suyo, estรก convencida de que la รบnica opciรณn vรกlida para la sobrevivencia del judaรญsmo es el respeto de los preceptos. En el templo se ocupa de que ningรบn judรญo se siente excluido. Por eso evita hablar de temas sensibles. No se refiereโal menos no en el primer acercamientoโa la importancia, para los varones, de usar tefilรญn todos los dรญas, no habla de la falta de no comer kasher. Da clases de hebreo, coordina grupos de reflexiรณn, distribuye las donaciones, hace de nexo entre la gente y el rabino, facilita los trรกmites para que las parejas puedan tener un buen casamiento judรญo.No espera que la gente golpee la puerta del templo, sale a recorrer Once, Villa Crespo, Palermo. Sabe que muchos de los religiosos con nueve o diez hijos a cuestas jamรกs admitirรญan la dificultad que implica vestir, alimentar la familia. Ella se ocupa de visitarlos y observar quรฉ le falta al mรกs chico, si es tiempo de comprar zapatos para los mรกs grandes. Busca a los jรณvenes. Los invita a descubrir sus raรญces judรญas. Y una vez que se sienten parte de la comunidad, empieza el verdadero retorno, el camino de regreso, la teshuvรก.
Los Halim, Emilia e Isaac tienen siete hijos en edades que van de los cuatro a los quince. De alguna manera, que todavรญa Natalia no puede explicar, Emilia logrรณ lo que muy pocas judรญas ortodoxas: siguiรณ estudiando, aรบn despuรฉs de casado, hasta recibirse en antropologรญa. Una vez que el tรญtulo estuvo colgado en la pared del living la sucesiรณn de niรฑos parece no tener fin. Es el tiempo de los hijos, decรญa Emilia. O: puse mi profesiรณn en pausa, ya la voy a retomar. Si en lugar de Emilia hubiese sido cualquier mujer quien le dijera asรญโalguna que recurriera en busca de consejo–, ella se hubiese sentido la obligaciรณn de reprenderla. Criar hijos judรญos es una tarea ardua, le habrรญa dicho, requiere de una cantidad de esfuerzo. Incluso se hubiese extendido en una cantidad de explicaciones, hubiese recurrido algรบn y la mujer se habrรญa ido con algo de culpa, convencida de que sus aspiraciones personales no podrรญan jamรกs ocupar mรกs que un segundo, tercer plano. Pero frente a Emilia jamรกs se sentirรญa autorizada a hablar de elecciones. Y no era que Emilia le fuese a recriminar nada. Jamรกs le habrรญa dicho: vos ni siquiera terminaste la carrera. Jamรกs la obligarรญa a repasar sus faltas. Pero a veces, cuando en la conversaciรณn salรญa el tema de Rafael, el hermano de Isaac โcรณmo le estaba yendo a Nueva Orleans, cรณmo se habรญan adaptado los hijos, en quรฉ templo trabajaba–, cuando Emilia le mostraba los artรญculos que publicaba en Israel Today, cuando le contaba el vacรญo que le hacรญan allรก los religiososโporque la transformaciรณn que Rafael querรญa infundirle al judaรญsmo tenรญa que ser el seno de las comunidades mรกs ortodoxas, en el ojo de la tormentaโy la manera en que intentaba de resistir, Natalia volvรญa sobre cada uno de sus errores; los ponรญa uno sobre otro hasta formar la gran masa de lo irremediable.
Por mรกs amigas que fueran, Emilia parecรญa no haberse dado cuenta. Insistรญa: podrรญas haber sido una buena esposa. Podrรญa: tendrรญa que haberlo conocido quince, veinte aรฑos atrรกs, respondรญa ella. ยฟPodrรญa haber sido una buena esposa? Quiรฉn sabe. Los planteos de Rafael Halim parecรญan disparatados. Si รฉl habรญa sido uno de los rabinos mรกs importantes de la comunidad, si habรญa sido quien le habรญa explicado la importancia de ver mรกs allรก de las mizvot, de entenderlas, para poder practicarlas, la nuestra es una religiรณn de la acciรณn, le decรญa, del hacer, de la prรกctica. Porque Natalia no habรญa nacido en una familia observante. Habรญa estudiado en el colegio hebreo, habรญa celebrado su Bat Mitzvรก, a veces iba al templo en Iom Kippur o Pesaj. No mucho mรกs. Despuรฉs de conocer a Emilia, de asistir a las reuniones a las que la invitaba, no habrรญa manera de detener su fervor religioso. Eran encuentros donde habรญa mรบsica, algo para comer, donde escuchaban las palabras del rab: de Rafael.
ยฟQuiรฉn hubiese podido hacer oรญdos sordos? Emilia fue testigo: bastaron un par de semanas para que Natalia empezara a colaborar en las tareas del templo. Su energรญa era tal que pasรณ de asistir a logรญstica de los grupos a dirigir los rezos de las mujeres y, despuรฉs, a coordinar los grupos de madrijim. Era una hormiga laborosa, siempre dispuesta a un poco mรกs. Con el correr de los meses, su manera de vestir, su forma de moverse empezaron a cambiar. Los jeans, los vestidos livianos fueron reemplazados por remeras de manga larga, polleras por debajo de la rodilla, medias de nylon, zapatos cerrados. Tambiรฉn los libros que llevaba en el bolso. Ya casi no leรญa los apuntes que ella misma vendรญa en la facultad. Sus compaรฑeros empezaron a preguntarle preguntas absurdas; le decรญan, ยฟno tenรฉs calor? o ยฟes verdad que para tener relaciones los ortodoxos usan una sรกbana que tiene un agujero? Ella no se ruborizaba; les respondรญa con altura, les hablaba de Maimรณnides, segura de estar un paso por delante de ellos.
Dejรณ el trabajo en la facultad primero, los estudios despuรฉs. El templo y Rafaelโporque Rafael todavรญa era el templo, porque todavรญa no ha decidido tirarlo todo por la bordaโocupaban todos sus rezos, todos sus pensamientosโฆ
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Era curioso: a pesar de ser casi hermanas, Emilia no se hubiese dado cuenta. Por eso Natalia empieza a hablar. Acepta, no sin culpa, el segundo vaso de vino que su amiga le ofreceโno le parece lo mejor, estar tomando vino mientras su padre se debate entre la vida y la muerteโy empieza a hablar. Lo hace como puede, como le va saliendo. Tantas veces ha revivido cada una de las escenas que va a contar que siente que no es ella la protagonista sino alguna otra, una mujer, mucho mรกs decidida y mejor plantada en la vida.
Fueron cinco noches, dice, las que pasรณ con Rafael. Cinco noches en las que a pesar de no entenderlo, de no dar crรฉdito a lo que confiaba, lo cobijรณ. lo amparรณ porque estaba perdido, porque tenรญa que ayudarlo a encontrar el camino de regreso, porque ya no habรญa de evitar lo que hacรญa aรฑos se habรญa empezado a gestar entre ellos. Dejรณ que la abrazara, que la besara, se dejรณ llevar a dรณnde Rafael la quisiera llevar. Por primera vez en mucho tiempo no pensรณ. Era Rafael Halim, el hermano de Isaac. Su maestro. A pesar de haberse afeitado, de estar quebrando los preceptos que รฉl mismo la habรญa impulsado a respetar. . .
Todo ha cambiado. Rafael no aparece por el templo. No llama, pasa un mes y Natalia se da cuenta de que estar con รฉl ha sido un grave error. Lo peor. Se da cuenta cuando se viste, cuando se baรฑa. Lo sabe y quiere que el tiempo retroceda. Recorre como nunca las calles, atiende a los viejos, habla con vehemencia en los grupos, logra que dos, tres jรณvenes regresen al camino del Buen Judรญo. Pero estรก desesperada. No puede decirle a nadie lo que sospecha porque no sabe quรฉ va a hacer despuรฉs. Tiene otro semblante: la piel estรก luminosa, los ojos brillan. No tiene dudas. Lleva varias semanas de retraso. Sus pechos son mucho mรกs firmes, si se los rozan, le duelanโฆ A pesar del cansancio que la lleva a dormirse en los colectivos, en el subte, a meterse en la cama apenas llega del templo. Estรก convencida de que una vez hecho lo que va a hacer ya nunca se verรก asรญ. Pero no hay otra manera de saldar del error. Se ocupรณ de todo. Se reuniรณ con el mรฉdicoโun hombre amable, de barba y camisa blanca, que bien podrรญa haber sido cualquier de los que se cruza a diario en el templo–: tรณmese unos dรญas, piรฉnselo bien, le habรญa dicho y Natalia, que รบltimamente ha vuelto una persona obediente, respetuosa de los protocolos ajenos, se tomรณ unos dรญas. A que Rafael la llamara.
Natalia habla y es como si retomara un relato iniciado mucho tiempo atrรกs. De a ratos sonrรญe, Busca la mirada de Emilia. Por momentos parece estar un poco mรกs allรก de la escena: del living salpicado de juguetes, de la mirada atenta de la otra. Le cuenta que esperรณ. Como pudo. Pero esperรณ…
La tarde en la que finalmente Rafael llamรณ, se cumplรญan dos semanas mรกs: despuรฉs habรญa explicado el mรฉdico, todo se complicaba bastante. Le pareciรณ que temblaba la voz: querรญa verla, dijo, tenรญan que hablar. Le dio la direcciรณn de un bar. Las ramas de los paraรญsos se abrazaban sobre la calle, formaban un tรบnel de ramas y pequeรฑos frutos contra el cielo blanco. Habรญa elegido una de las mesas de atrรกs, lejos de la ventana. Parecรญa otro. Flaco. Desaliรฑado. Tenรญa un suรฉter azul, una bufanda enroscada alrededor del cuello. Natalia se alegrรณ: un kipรก le cubrรญa la cabeza. Cuando abriรณ la puerta del bar, cuando se dejรณ ver, por un segundo, por una milรฉsima de segundo, creyรณ que se habรญa dado cuenta. Si era imposible disimularlo, si estaba escrito en todo su cuerpo. Los ojos, la piel, la manera de andar. Rafael sonriรณ. Pero no la abrazรณ. No caminรณ a su encuentro. Se levantรณ y despuรฉs de darle un beso rรกpido en la mejilla, volviรณ a concentrarse en su cafรฉ. Tenรญa mucho que decirle. Le estaban pasando tantas cosas. Le preguntรณ cรณmo estaba ella. Estaba bien. Le preguntรณ: cรณmo fueron esos dรญas. Habรญan estado bien. ยฟEl templo? Bien, dijo Natalia y estaba dispuesto a no decirle mucho mรกs, cuando se encontrรณ contรกndole sobre el entusiasmo de los chicos que viajaban a Israel, la ayuda de Ethel Naim en los grupos de mujeres, sobre el nuevo rab, sobre las chicas en la clase de hebreo, se encontrรณ riรฉndose con รฉl. ยฟY vos?, se animรณ a preguntar. Rafael no respondiรณ enseguida. Necesitaba estar solo, dijo finalmente. Y despuรฉs: ya te debรฉs de haber enterado: me voy con mi familia a Estados Unidos. Mientras lo escuchaba, Natalia lo vio transformarse nuevamente en el querido por todos, lo imaginรณ detrรกs de un estrado, gigante, enorme, inalcanzable. Se acomodรณ el paรฑuelo azul, siguiรณ con el รญndice el dibujo de la tela sobre la frente, aunque no quedaba claro muy bien, si este hombre ya no respetaba los mismos preceptos que ella. Se alejรณ de la escena. Dejรณ de estar ahรญ. Tengo que reunirme con unas mujeres en Flores, dijo. Y รฉl no preguntรณ mucho mรกs. Si Rafael sabรญa o no lo que vivรญa dentro de ella, ya no tenรญa importancia. Perdรณn, mi amor, dijo, pero Natalia ya no lo escuchรณ o si lo escuchรณ simplemente vio las palabras desarticulรกndose, enredarse entre las ramas de los paraรญsos, perderse en el aire quieto de la tarde y desaparecer.
Lo que Natalia acaba de decir ocupaba tanto espacio que, por un rato, ninguna habla. Emilia lleva los vasos a la cocina, camina hasta la ventana y observa durante unos minutos lo que sucede afuera.
–Estaba tan linda, tendrรญas que haberme visto, estaba radiante.
–Estabas esperando un hijo โdice Emilia y sonrรญe.
Se acerca, la besa en la mejilla, la toma de la mano, cierra los ojos.
Las amigas se quedan un rato asรญ, abrazadas, hasta que en un momento Emilia se desprende, pregunta:
From: Carolina Esses. Un buen judรญo. Buenos Aires: Bajo la luna, 1917. pp. 57-66.
“A Good Jew”
Natalia loves the Halims. Among them, she doesnโt have to say anything that is politically correct pretend that it was the same to respect the the Shabbat or not. Especially because, although day to day, she showed her more moderate side to herself, she was convinced that the only valid option for the survival of Judaism is the respect of the laws. In the temple, she takes the responsibility that no Jew feels excluded. For that reason, she avoids speaking about sensitive topics. She doesnโt refer toโat least at the first get-togetherโabout the importance for the men to put on tefillin every day, she doesnโt speak of the offense of not eating Kosher food. She gives Hebrew classes, coordinates groups for reflection, distributes the donations, makes the connection between people and the rabbi, facilitates the formalities so that couples can have a good Jewish wedding.
She doesnโt wait for people to knock on the temple door, she went out to go around Once, Villa Crespo, Palermo. She knows que many of the religious people with nine or ten children in their homes would never admit the difficulties, implied by clothing and feeding the family. She takes the responsibility to visit them and observe what youngest needs, if its time to buy shoes for the older ones. She searched for the boys. She invited them to discover their Jewish roots. And once they feel part of the community, the true return begins, the tshuvah.
The Halims, Emilia and Isaac have seven children at ages that go from four to fifteen. In a way that Natalia canโt explain, Emilia achieved what few Orthodox Jewish did: she kept studying, even after her marriage, until she graduated with a degree in anthropology. Once the degree was hung on the wall in the living room, the succession of children seemed to be endless. It is the time of the children, Emily said. Or: I put my profession on hold, I will take it up again. If in place of Emilia, another woman had said that to herโsomeone who would resort to her for adviceโshe would have felt the obligation to reprimand her. To bring up children is an arduous task, she would have told her, it requires enormous effort. She even would have gone on with a great number of explanations, would have scolded her, and the woman would have left with some guilt, convinced that her personal aspiration would never be able to occupy more than a second or third position. But in front of Emilia, she felt authorized to speak of choices. And it wasnโt that Emilia would never criticize her. She would never have said to her: you never even finished your studies. She would never oblige her to re-examine her weaknesses. But at times, when in the conversation, they dealt with the theme of Rafael, Isaacโs brotherโhow he was going to New Orleans, how the children had adjusted, in which temple he was working–, when Emilia showed her the articles that he published in Israel Today, when she told her about the emptiness of the religious people thereโbecause the transformation that Rafael wanted to infuse in Judaism had to be in the heart of the most orthodox communities, in the eye of the stormโand the manner in which he intended to resist, Natalia went over every one of her errors; she placed them one after another until forming the great mass of the irreparable.
Despite being as close as sisters, Emilia wouldn’t have understood. She insisted: you could have been a good wife. You could have, you must have known him fifteen, twenty years ago, she responded. Could I have been a good wife? Who knows? Rafael Halimโs plans seemed so ridiculous. If he had been one of the most important of the community rabbis, if he had been the one to explain to her the importance of seeing beyond the mitzvot, to understand them, to be able to practice them, ours is a religion of action, she was told, of doing, of practice. Because Natalia had not been born in an observant family. She had studied in a Hebrew high school, she had celebrated her Bat Mitzvah, once in a while, she went to temple for Yom Kippur or Passover. Not much more. After meeting Emilia, attending the meetings to which she invited her, there was no way to stop her religious fervor. There were meetings where there was music, something to eat, where she heard the words of the rab: of Rafael.
Who could have had deaf ears? Emilia was witness. Natalia began to collaborate in the temple chores. Her energy was such that the went from helping with the logistics of the groups to directing the womenโs prayers and, later to coordinating groups of madrichim, teachers. She was a laborious ant; always ready for a little more. With the months passing, her manner of dress, her manner of moving began to change. The jeans, the light dresses were replaced with long sleeved tee-shirts, skirts below the knee, nylon stockings, closed shoes, Also, the books she carried in her bag, she hardly read any longer the notes that she herself sold at school. Her friends asked her absurd questions; they said to her, โarenโt you warm?โ or is it true that to have relations, the Orthodox use a sheet that has a hole?โ She didnโt blush; she responded to them with pride, she spoke to them of Maimonides, sure of being one step ahead of them.
She left her job at the university first, her studies later. The temple and Rafaelโbecause Rafael was still the temple, as he had not yet decided to throw everything overboardโoccupied all her prayers, all her thoughtsโฆ
It was curious: despite being almost sisters, Emilia had not understood. Por that reason, Natalia began to speak. She accepted, without guilt, the second glass of wine that her friend offered herโit didnโt seem to be best thing to do, to be drinking wine while her father was debating between life and deathโand she began to speak. She did as well as she could, as if it were coming out of her. She had relived, so many times, every one of the scenes that she was going to relate that she feels that she is not the protagonist, but rather another woman, much more determined and better grounded in life. There were five nights, she said, that she spent with Rafael. Five nights in which despite not understanding it, to not give credit to what was confided, she protected him, she sheltered him because he was lost, because she had to help him find the path of return, because no longer had to avoid what years ago had begun to gestate between them. For the first time in a long time, she didnโt think. It was Rafael Halim, Isaacโs brother. Her teacher. Despite his having shaved, despite that he was breaking the laws that he himself had pushed her to respect. . .
Everything had changed. Rafael doesnโt appear in the temple. He doesnโt call. A month passes, and Natalia realizes that being with him was a grave error. The worst. She realizes it when she gets dressed, when she bathes. She knows it and wishes time to go backward. She covers the streets as never before, she attends to the old, she speaks vehemently in the groups, she accomplishes that two, three youths return to the path of the Good Jew. But she is desperate. She canโt tell anyone what she suspects because she doesnโt know what as her next step. She has a different look: her skin is luminous, her eyes shine. She has no doubt. She is several weeks late. Her breasts are much firmer, if she brushes against them, they hurtโฆ Despite the exhaustion that causes her to fall asleep in the buses, in the subway, to go to bed when she has just returned from the temple. Se is convinced that once sheโs done what she is going to do, she will never look like this again. But there is no other way to put an end to her mistake. She took care of everything. She met with a doctorโa kind man, with a white shirt and beard, who well could have been one of those who pass daily through the temple–: take a few days, think it over well, he had said to her, and Natalia, who lately had become an obedient person, respectful of the protocols of others, she took a few days. So that Rafael call her.
Natalia speaks and it is if sho took up a story begun a long time before. At times, she smiled. She looked for Emiliaโs gaze. For some moments she seemed to by beyond the scene: the living room filled with toys, the attentive gaze of the other woman. She told her that she waited. As well as she could. But she waited.
The afternoon when Rafael finally called, it was two weeks later: after that the doctor had explained, everything becomes a lot more difficult. It seemed to her that his voice trembled: he wanted to see her, he said, they had to talk. He gave her the address of a bar. The branches of the paradise trees hug each other over the street, they form a tunnel of branches and small fruit against the white sky. He had chosen one of the tables in the back, away from the window. He seemed like a different person. Skinny. Disheveled. He wore a blue sweater, a rolled-up scarf around his neck. Natalia was pleased, a kippah covered his head. When he opened the door of the bar, when he showed himself, for a second, for a thousandth of a second, she believed that he had noticed. If it was impossible to hide it, if it was written all over her body. Her eyes, her skin, her way of walking. Rafael smiled. But he didnโt hug her. He didnโt walk over to meet her. He got up and after giving her a kiss on the cheek, returned to concentrate on his coffee. He had a lot to tell her. So much was happening to him. He asked how she was. She was fine. How were the recent days? They had been fine. The temple? Fine, Natalia said, and she didnโt intend to tell him much more, when she found herself telling him about the enthusiasm of the children who traveled to Israel, Ethel Naimโs help with the womenโs groups, about the new rab, about the kids in the Hebrew class. She found herself laughing with him. And you? She brought herself to ask, Rafael didnโt respond immediately. He needed to be alone, he finally said. And then, you must have already heard : Iโm going to the United States with my family. While she was listening to him, Natalia saw him transform himself once more in the one loved by all, she imagined him behind a podium, giant, enormous, out of reach. She adjusted the blue kerchief, with her finger, she traced with her index finger the pattern of the cloth above her forehead, although it wasnโt very clear why, if this man no longer followed the same precepts that she did. She distanced herself from the scene. She ceased being there. I must meet with some women in Flores, she said. And he didnโt ask her much more. If Rafael knew or didnโt know what was living inside of her, no longer had any importance. Iโm sorry, my love, he said, but Natalia no longer heard him, or if she heard him, she simple saw the words breaking apart, tangling in the branches of the paradise trees, losing themselves in the afternoon quiet and disappearing.
What Natalia had just said took up so much space, that, for a while, neither speaks. Emilia takes the glasses to the kitchen, walks to the window, and observes for a few minutes what was going on outside.
โI was so pretty, you would have to had to have seen me, I was radiant.โ
โYou were expecting a childโEmilia says and smiles. She comes close and kisses her on the cheek, takes her hand, closes her eyes.
The friends stay this way for a while, hugging, until, in a moment, Emilia lets go, asks:
Ricardo Lapin es un artista plรกstico, escritor y conferencista radicado en Israel. Naciรณ en Buenos Aires, Argentina, 1961. A los 16 aรฑos partiรณ a Israel en tiempos de la Junta Militar. Comenzรณ a estudiar pintura al รณleo a los 10 aรฑos, y esta disciplina se convirtiรณ en una forma de vida: tambiรฉn creando y tambiรฉn enseรฑando. Estudiรณ 4 aรฑos en el Taller “Rรญo de la Plata” en Buenos Aires (de tendencia constructivista-JoaquรญnTorres-Garcรญa) y en la Academia Bezalel de Jerusalรฉn (B.F.A., 1988).
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Ricardo Lapin is an artist, writer and lecturer based in Israel. He was born in Buenos Aires, Argentina, 1961. At the age of 16, he left for Israel during the time of the Military Junta. He began studying oil painting at the age of 10, and this discipline became a way of life: also creating and also teaching. He studied for 4 years at the “Rรญo de la Plata” Workshop in Buenos Aires (constructivist-Joaquรญn Torres-Garcรญa) and at the Bezalel Academy in Jerusalem (B.F.A., 1988).
Creo que el artista debe reflejar el “Zeitgeist” del perรญodo en el que trabaja. Mis propias luchas y dilemas, la cultura y el entorno en el que vivo estรกn presentes en cada obra. La pintura para mรญ es mi lugar mรกs protegido y estable, como un refugio invaluable. Siempre presente, desde mi mรกs tierna infancia, a pesar de las situaciones y realidades cambiantes. Un territorio que se puede construir y cambiar sin cesar, un lugar de encuentro de recuerdos, miedos, deseos. Dentro del proceso creativo todo tiene existencia, sin nombre ni definiciรณn; un lugar donde todo es posible y reparable. .. Junto a la expresiรณn estรฉtica, mis obras buscan examinar los lรญmites de la justicia y la libertad, el significado de la vida y la muerte en un perรญodo de pรฉrdida espiritual, depresiรณn y continua devaluaciรณn de la vida humana .. Las imรกgenes me vienen a mรญ. Como despertando de un sueรฑo, los atrapo dibujรกndolos, dibujรกndolos antes de que se escapen; luego las articulo y encuentro nuevas imรกgenes relacionadas, en un proceso asociativo. Puedo percibir que muchas imรกgenes tienen un aroma a relatos orales, recuerdos, leyendas familiares, traumas secretos. A veces llegan del misterio y se quedan ahรญ, incluso cuando ya estรกn pintadas. El trabajo final es a veces una especie de oraciรณn inconclusa, para ser completada por el pรบblico, de muchas maneras sorprendentes, a veces muy lejos de mis asociaciones e ideas durante el proceso creativo. Siempre es mรกgico y veraz para mรญ darme cuenta de las mรบltiples formas de leer mi obra.
I believe that the artist should reflect the “Zeitgeist” of the period in which he works. My own struggles and dilemmas, the culture and the environment in which I live are present in each work. Painting for me is my most protected and stable place, like an invaluable refuge. Always present, from my earliest childhood, despite changing situations and realities. A territory that can be built and changed endlessly, a meeting place for memories, fears, desires. Within the creative process everything has existence, without name or definition; a place where everything is possible and fixable. .. Along with aesthetic expression, my works seek to examine the limits of justice and freedom, the meaning of life and death in a period of spiritual loss, depression and continuous devaluation of human life .. The images come to me me. As if waking up from a dream, I catch them drawing them, drawing them before they escape; then I articulate them and find new related images, in an associative process. I can perceive that many images have an aroma of oral stories, memories, family legends, secret traumas. Sometimes they come from the mystery and stay there, even when they are already painted. The final work is sometimes a kind of unfinished sentence, to be completed by the public, in many surprising ways, sometimes far removed from my associations and ideas during the creative process. It is always magical and truthful for me to realize the multiple ways of reading my work.
The Amphoraex22s Dream II, 2009, oil on canvas, 1 X 1,20 m
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Amplificaciรณn de la entrada por la guerra en Gaza/Enlargement of the blogpost because of the War in Gaza
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Fabriano 2023
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De: Ricardo Lapin, 16 de octubre 2023
Colgando de clavos ardientes
No me olvido, como podrรญa/ El viernes segunda fiesta de Sucot, yendo a almorzar a lo de mi hijo mayor, se cumpliรณ medio siglo/ Seis de octubre, a las 14 horas, volvieron las grabaciones de la catรกstrofe/ como un presagio maligno, โSir basar, Sir basarโ (olla de carne)-โJamsim kaved, jamsim kavedโ (Siroco pesado), los cรณdigos para unidades de combate, presentarse de inmediato/ Fiesta, viernes, encuentro ameno y rica comida/ Por la noche el encuentro de los primos Lapines en Modiin, el tradicional encuentro de pizzas en la Sucรก/ con hijos y nietos, ya unas 20 personas/ alguien me recordรณ que yo fui el primero en llegar de los 5 primos, y Lara con pasaje para venir en 2 semanas, luego de recibirse de arquitecta/ Brindamos por otra prima entre nosotros, en el paรญs/ Y me fui temprano porque quedamos con amigos para el sรกbado en casa: empanadas caseras, chorizos y un buen vino tinto./ El sรกbado llegรณ con sirenas por la maรฑana/ correr a las escaleras, la vecina rusa cerrando su batรณn mientras trata de controlar el stress que las sirenas le producen. Charla coloquial, que carajos es esto de despertarnos en sรกbado de Simjรก Torรก/ Buscar informaciรณn en noticieros, mucho caos, mucho pรกnico: ataque en el sur por la franja de Gaza/ Cientos de terroristas entraron-ยฟcรณmo mierda?-atacan los kibutzim, las ciudades de Sderot, de Ofaquim/ No puede ser, es una pesadilla, ยฟdรณnde estรก la fuerza aรฉrea, los tanques, las divisiones de infanterรญa?/Llamar a mi suegra Mati en el kibutz Najal Oz: pidieron que se encierren en los cuartos blindados, todo en orden/ Adriรกn desde Mefalsim nos escribe que estรกn encerrados sin electricidad, y que terroristas entraron en su kibutz, se oyen tiros, bombazos y gritos/ ยกQuรฉ es esta pesadilla maldita, que se termine de una vez!/ Creemos que es una segunda guerra de Yom Kippur, quedamos aferrados al televisor, pero a medida que llegan informaciones y noticias, esto toma olor distinto: nos estรกn conquistando aldeas y ciudades/ El รกnimo baja a cero del mazazo, llegan informaciones confusas, todas catastrรณficas: jรณvenes de un festival masacrados, capturan rehenes, degรผellan familias maniatadas, bebรฉs y niรฑos, torturados, vejados y ejecutados/ No, no es 1973, yo reconozco ese tufillo infame: es el Holocausto, es mi madre huyendo de niรฑa en la nieve, perseguida por perros y Waffen SS, por cazas Messerschmitt ametrallando caravanas de refugiados y fugitivos, escondida en sรณtanos o con mi abuela acostada sobre ella y su hermana Zlate, en medio de un bombardeo aรฉreo/ es ella adulta confesando en el filo de la demencia, que pasรณ abuso sexual/ Comienzan a circular fotos y vรญdeos de los secuestros, de las vejaciones y torturas, de los rehenes abusados/ ยกFuimos traicionadosโฆfueron traicionados y abandonados! / Mati sigue encerrada y bien; varias horas despuรฉs, combatientes reservistas con armas en sus casas se organizan en grupos de camaradas y bajan al sur a combatir, a ayudar, a salvar civiles, ya que la naciรณn no existe, ciega, sorda y muda/ Angustia atroz, paralizante, como un veneno que avanza por el cuerpo espeso e implacable/ que deja paso al odio feroz, a un enojo volcรกnico, y horas despuรฉs ya comienzan las iniciativas personales y civiles frente a un gobierno inoperante: somos naciรณn nacida a la sombra del Holocausto, somos un ADN de traumas y postraumas constantes, hilvanados como una red de cicatrices/ Operativo tras operativo, guerra tras guerra, atentado tras atentado/ muertos civiles y militares/ y allรญ lejos, como humo que el viento esfuma, unos intentos de paz, de convivencia, de ingenuidad/ Faivush el lituano me lo dijo โRicardo, no se puede hacer una guerra con estos enemigos pensando que estamos luchando contra escandinavosโ/ No me olvido de Subji del campamento de refugiados de Jabalya y de su compadre Rafik del campamento de Shati en Gaza, que vivรญan durante la semana en el kibutz, y volvรญan a sus casas cada weekend/ no olvido que nos construรญan las casas y eran casi miembros: preparaban falafel para todo el kibutz, recibรญan donaciones de los miembros cuando sus casas eran afectadas por el conflicto/ Recuerdo comprar mi primer mueble ya liberado del servicio en la ciudad de Gaza, unas estanterรญas de bambรบ y mimbre en la avenida Al-Nasser/ y no olvido los lupines en agua salada de Beit Lahรญa, o el mejor ful medames de toda Gaza a la vuelta del edificio de la Gobernaciรณn militar/ y no olvido esas playas bellรญsimas, de blanca arena y pescadores remendando sus redes/ y no olvido que volvimos con 5 muertos del servicio de reservas en plenas tratativas de paz en 1994 en Netzarim/ o aquel yihadista que nos comenzรณ a charlar en espaรฑol a Caniche y a mรญ, confesandonos que habrรญa atentados proximamente en Espaรฑa por sus desfachatez de haber convertido mezquitas en iglesias hace 500 aรฑos, en pleno zoco de Jabalya/ y mataron a Rabin y el sueรฑo comenzรณ a morir con รฉl.
Mis hijos recibieron llamados de emergencia, el siempre temido Tzav 8. Tambiรฉn yo lo recibรญen el kibutz, en 1982/ Entonces fue el Lรญbano, ahora Gaza, maldito lugar / Luego de una semana de comer vidrios molidos y aferrarnos a clavos ardientes, se tiene una dimensiรณn del desastre/ el gobierno, sarta de impotentes e inoperantes, brilla por su ausencia. Mi suegra fue recatada tras 20 horas de encierro y mucha suerte / Una heroรญna en sus 83 aรฑos, quien lo hubiera pensado. Vecinas y vecinos de sus edades similares no tuvieron su suerte / Viajamos al sur a pedido de Michael, que anuncia que estรกn a punto de tomar posiciones alrededor de la Franja, llevando ropa limpia, torta y alfajores, y algunas herramientas que en toda guerra hacen las cosas mรกs llevaderas y seguras / la ruta 6 es un hervidero de camiones y semi-trailers con tanques y semiorugas, de camionetas con equipo y gente furiosa con deseos de entrar a Gaza/ En Beit Qamรก la estaciรณn de servicio es un hervidero de gentes: uniformados, civiles / religiosos que ofrecen tefilim y fotos del Rebe de Lubavich / Llegamos al fin a la base que es un ordenado caos de gente, soldados, familiares y novias, reservistas, autos con banderas drusas, israelรญes, de Jabad, perros y gente que reparte agua, gaseosas, shakshuka / Encontramos a Michael que recibe un par de horas para charlar y despedirse. Su primera guerra, carajo. Hace dos meses se liberรณ de servicio. / Te deseo lo mejor, la protecciรณn, la suerte, la supervivencia/ Recuerdo en 1982 que cada uno se aferraba, en la diabรณlica incertidumbre, a algรบn amuleto, a rezar salmos, a escribir el nombre de la novia en un brazo, a poner una foto querida en el bolsillo izquierdo de la camisa, junto al corazรณn/ Participรฉ con mi suegra en su Birkat Hagomel pero no pido cosas a Dios, es como pedirlas al gobierno/ Confรญo en ti y en tus compaรฑeros: vayan en paz y regresen sanos y salvos. / Es la hora del heroรญsmo y los milagros.
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Follow me!!!
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BY: Ricardo Lapin, October 16, 2023
Hanging on burning nails
I don’t forget, as I might have/ On Friday the second holiday of Sukkot, going to lunch at my eldest son’s, half a century before/ October 6, at 2 p.m., the sounds of the catastrophe returned/ like an evil omen, โSir basar, Sir basarโ (meat pot)-โJamsim kaved, jamsim kavedโ (Heavy Sirocco), the codes for combat units, report immediately/ Party, Friday, pleasant meeting and delicious food/ At night the meeting of the Lapines cousins โโin Modiin, the traditional pizza meeting in the Sukkah/ with children and grandchildren, and about 20 people/ someone reminded me that I was the first to arrive of the 5 cousins, and Lara with a ticket to come in 2 weeks, after graduating as an architect/ We toasted another cousin among us, in the country/ And I left early because we were meeting friends for Saturday at home: homemade empanadas, chorizos and a good red wine./ Saturday arrived with sirens during the morning/running to the stairs, the Russian neighbor closing her dressing gown while trying to control the stress that the sirens cause her. Colloquial talk, what the hell is this about waking up on the Sabbath of Simcha Torah/ Search for information in , a lot of chaos, a lot of panic: attack in the south through the Gaza Strip / Hundreds of terrorists entered – how the hell? – they attack the kibbutzim, the cities of Sderot, Ofaquim / It can’t be, it’s a nightmare, where is the air force, the tanks, the infantry divisions? / Call my mother-in-law Mati at the Najal Oz kibbutz: they asked to lock themselves in the armored rooms, everything in order / Adriรกn from Mefalsim writes to us that they are locked up without electricity, and that terrorists entered their kibbutz, shots, bombs and screams are heard/ What is this cursed nightmare, let it end once and for all!/ We believe it is a second Yom Kippur war, we remain clinging to the television, but as information arrives and news, this takes on a different smell: they are conquering our villages and cities/ The spirit drops to zero from the sledgehammer, confusing information arrives, all catastrophic: young people from a festival massacred, hostages captured, tied families, babies and children, tortured, humiliated, slaughtered and executed/ No, it is not 1973, I recognize that infamous whiff: it is the Holocaust, it is my mother fleeing as a child in the snow, pursued by dogs and Waffen SS, by Messerschmitt fighters machine-gunning caravans of refugees and fugitives, hidden in basements or with my grandmother lying on top of her and her sister Zlate, in the middle of an aerial bombardment/ she is an adult confessing, on the verge of dementia, that she suffered sexual abuse/ Photos and videos of the kidnappings, humiliation and torture begin to circulate, of the abused hostages/ We were betrayedโฆthey were betrayed and abandoned! / Mati is still locked up and doing well; several hours and good so far. Several hours later, reservist combatants with weapons in their homes organize themselves into groups of comrades and go down to the south to fight, to help, to save civilians, since the nation does not exist, blind, deaf and mute/ Atrocious, paralyzing anguish, as a poison that advances through the thick and implacable body / that gives way to fierce hatred, to volcanic anger, and hours later personal and civil initiatives begin in the face of an inoperative government: we are a nation born in the shadow of the Holocaust, we are a DNA of constant traumas and post-traumas, woven together like a network of scars/ Operation after operation, war after war, attack after attack/ civilian and military deaths/ and there far away, like smoke that the wind dissipates, some attempts at peace, at coexistence, of naivety/ Faivush, the Lithuanian told me โRicardo, you cannot wage war with these enemies thinking that we are fighting against Scandinaviansโ/ I have not forgotten Subji from the Jabalya refugee camp and his compadre Rafik from the Shati camp in Gaza, who lived during the week in the kibbutz, and returned to their homes every weekend/ I do not forget that they built our houses and were almost members: they prepared falafel for the entire kibbutz, they received donations from the members when their houses were affected by the conflict/ I remember buying my first piece of furniture already released from service in Gaza City, some bamboo and wicker shelves on Al-Nasser Avenue/ and I do not forget the lupines in salt water from Beit Lahia, or the best ful medames in all of Gaza the return of the military Government building/ and I do not forget those beautiful beaches, with white sand and fishermen mending their nets/ and I do not forget that we returned with 5 dead from the reserve service in the middle of peace negotiations in 1994 in Netzarim/ or that jihadist who began to chat in Spanish to Caniche and me, confessing that there would be attacks soon in Spain for his audacity of having converted mosques into churches 500 years ago, in the middle of the Jabalya souk/ and they killed Rabin and the dream began to die with him .
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My children received emergency calls, the always feared Tzav 8. I also received it in the kibbutz, in 1982/ Then it was Lebanon, now Gaza, damned place/ After a week of eating ground glass and clinging to burning nails, it was It has a dimension of disaster/ the government, packed with impotent and ineffective people, is conspicuous by its absence. My mother-in-law was modest after 20 hours of confinement and a lot of luck / A heroine in her 83 years, who would have thought it. Neighbors of similar ages did not have their luck / We travel south at the request of Michael, who announces that they are about to take positions around the Strip, carrying clean clothes, cake and alfajores, and some tools that in every war they make the most bearable and safe things / Route 6 is a hive of trucks and semi-trailers with tanks and half-tracks, of vans with equipment and angry people wanting to enter Gaza / In Beit Qamรก the service station is a hive of people : uniformed, civilians / religious offering tefilim and photos of the Lubavich Rebbe / We finally arrive at the base which is an orderly chaos of people, soldiers, family members and girlfriends, reservists, cars with Druze, Israeli, Chabad flags, dogs and people handing out water, soda, shakshuka / We find Michael who gets a couple of hours to chat and say goodbye. His first war, damn it. Two months ago he was released from service. / I wish you the best, protection, luck, survival / I remember in 1982 that each one clung, in diabolical uncertainty, to some amulet, to pray psalms, to write the name of the bride on one’s arm, to put a beloved photo in the left pocket of the shirt, next to the heart/ I participated with my mother-in-law in her Birkat Hagomel but I don’t ask for things from God, it’s like asking the government/ I trust in you and your companions: go in peace and return healthy and saved. / It is the hour of heroism and miracles.
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PENTAEX Image
Eine kleine Nachtpatrol
Balada para la novia viuda/Ballad for the Bride-Widow
Licenciada en Letras en la UBA, Myriam Escliar es ademรกs de escritora, profesora de inglรฉs e italiano, traductora, entre otros, de autores tales como Isaac Bashevis Singer. Como escritora ha publicado un conjunto de ensayos sobre las pioneras en los tiempos de la inmigraciรณn, bajo el tรญtulo Mujeres en la literatura y la vida judeoargentina (1996); Fenia (1997), novela histรณrica sobre la vida de la socialista, feminista del Siglo XX, Fenia Chertkoff. Ambas obras, junto con Blackie, con todo respeto (2007) y Mujeres extraordinarias (2009), novela que versa sobre las historias de Cecilia Grierson, Julieta Lanteri, Fenia Chertkoff y Carolina Muzzilli son biografรญas noveladas. Tambiรฉn publicรณ Arele y otras historias (1998), cuentos que versan sobre relatos de inmigrantes en la Argentina y Los otros gauchos judรญos (2005), una biografรญa novelada sobre la inmigraciรณn judรญa en Entre Rรญos. Moishe Korin, De la Cole
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With a degree in Literature from the UBA, Myriam Escliar is also a writer, a teacher of English and Italian, and a translator, among others, of authors such as Isaac Bashevis Singer. As a writer, she has published a set of essays on women pioneers in the times of immigration, under the title Mujeres en la literatura judeoargentina (1996); Fenia (1997), historical novel about the life of the socialist, feminist of the 20th century, Fenia Chertkoff. Both works, along with “Blackie, con todo el respeto (2007) and Mujeres extraordinarias (2009), a novel that deals with the stories of Cecilia Grierson, Julieta Lanteri, Fenia Chertkoff and Carolina Muzzilli art novelized biographies. She also published Arele y otras historias (1998), short stories that deal with stories of immigrants in Argentina, and Los otros gauchos judรญosโ (2005) a novelized biography about Jewish immigration in Entre Rรญos.
–No te citรฉ sรณlo para hablar de mรญ, sino para te enterรฉs quien viene dentro de un mes.
–Sรญ, ya lo sรฉ, la compaรฑรญa de Maurice Schwartz, que interpretarรก un โHamletโ en el โExcelsiorโ, espectรกculo que va a ser para alquilar balcones.
–Lo que creo es que desconocรฉs que en el mismo viaje viene una gran actriz cรณmica, que, aunque no sรฉ si va a trabajar con su compaรฑรญa, quiere conocer Buenos Aires, ya estรก haciendo una gira por Latinoamรฉricaโฆ
–ยฟQuiรฉn es?
–La gran Molly Picon, todo un รฉxito en Broadway, aunque desconocida para nosotros.
–No, no es verdad, sino preguntรกle a mi madre, quiรฉn es su actriz favorita, cada vez que va al cine.
–Sรญ, pero en tรฉrminos generales, no es demasiado conocida entre los actores y directores que no son judรญos, a pesar de ser una gran actriz teatral y del cine mudo en idisch como atestiguan las crรญticas de los diarios norteamericanos. Mirรก la Asociaciรณn de Actores Judรญos ha decidido recibirla en el puerto y se me ocurriรณ que serรญa interesantes que vinieras en tu calidad de crรญtico teatral, en representaciรณn de โIdishe Zaitungโ seguro que tu presencia la harรก sentir muy halagada.
Agradecido por su propuesta, en cuanto llegรณ del arribo me apresurรฉ ir a recibirla al puerto y cuando la vi bajar por la planchada del barco, lo primero que me impresionaron fueron sus enormes ojos, que parecรญan no entender el motivo de tanto agasajo, con la modestia que sรณlo pueden experimentar los verdaderos grandes.
A los pocos dรญas de su llegada, el director del diario me comunicรณ que debรญa hacerle un reportaje y cuando lleguรฉ a su alojamiento me sorprendiรณ su sencillez, contrastado con el lujo de los hoteles en los que Maurice Schwartz, Joseph Buloff y Jacob Ben-Ami habรญan elegido. Me estaba esperando en el lobby y apenas la vi, tuve conciencia la corriente de simpatรญa que se establecรญa entre los dos.
Tomamos el ascensor que nos llevรณ al hospedaje, que consistรญa en un dormitorio y un pequeรฑo lugar de estar, viendo casi enseguida de entrar, sobre su pequeรฑa mesa, algunas fotos de ella y su marido.
Luego de sentarnos de dos cรณmodas sillones. Me ofreciรณ un vaso de whisky, que rechacรฉ, aceptando, en cambio, una rica tacita de cafรฉ, situaciรณn que aprovechรฉ para comenzar el reportaje, en el que casi no tuve que hacer preguntas, ya que ella comenzรณ a relatarme su historia como si fuera un viejo amigo.
Habรญa nacido en el Lower East Side, barrio pobre de Nueva York y su familia provenรญa de Kiev. Su padre habรญa emigrado primero, abandonando a su familia constituida de por tres hijos y debieron pasar muchos aรฑos para que Molly conociera a sus hermanos en el transcurso de una gira por Europa, hundidos casi en la miseria, por lo que decidiรณ ayudarlos, de inmediato, prometiรฉndoles hacer lo imposible para que viajaran a EE. UU., donde encontrarรญan mรกs posibilidades de trabajo.
Tuvo una infancia miserable, ya que cuando llegaron a Amรฉrica, la madre debiรณ trabajar como costurera en un teatro de music-hall y la niรฑa de sรณlo de 4 aรฑos, observando a las integrantes del elenco, comenzรณ a imitarlas, cantando las canciones que interpretaban las actrices. Una de ellas, viendo la actuaciรณn de la futura โestrellaโ, sugiriรณ a su progenitora que la presentara al director de la compaรฑรญa y ese mismo dรญa, en el viaje hacia su casa, deleitรณ al pasaje del รณmnibus con el estreno de su propio show, por el que cobrรณ su primer cachet de 4 dรณlares, siendo un borracho que el encargado de recoger el dinero en una gorra.
Ese fue el comienzo de su carrera, ya que, a partir de ahรญ, la llamaron para interpretar todos los papeles de niรฑa necesarios en cualquier obra y cada vez que se preguntaba en algรบn concurso, ganaba el primer premio, siempre.
A medida que contaba su historia, sus grandes ojos comenzaron a llenarse de lรกgrimas, brillando de tal modo que parecรญa volver a ser aquella niรฑa que habรญa nacido en 1898, y debiรณ abandonar la Escuela Elemental, al poco tiempo, por la miseria que se veรญa en casa, obligรกndola a trabajar a trabajar durante tres aรฑos, haciendo shows de variedades, recorriendo pequeรฑas ciudades y pueblos ignotos, recibiendo magros salarios, en la mayorรญa de los casos, dependiendo de la suerte del show y del empresario del turno, que se quedaba con casi todas las ganancias. Al llegar a los 20 aรฑos, al finalizar una fracasada temporada en Boston, se encontrรณ con el que serรญa su compaรฑero durante 58 aรฑos, Jacob Karlij (Iankel), que ya era un productor de buena situaciรณn econรณmica y gracias a รฉl, la incursiรณn de Molly en el teatro en idisch del que no se separarรญa nunca. Despuรฉs de un tiempo de convivencia, quedando embarazada, decidieron casarse, pero, para su desgracia pierde a su hijo antes de nacer, dolor del que no podrรญa reponerse nunca, como lo manifiesta casi al borde del llanto,
A esa altura del relato, Molly no pudo seguir hablando, la emociรณn pudo mรกs que ella y cuando reiniciรณ, ya no fue la misma, me pareciรณ verla envejecer de golpe, reponiรฉndose, casi enseguida, gracias a sus condiciones de gran actriz.
–Nadie que no haya pasado un momento tan terrible, puede imaginar esa situaciรณn tan desesperante. Nada me interesaba y hasta pensรฉ dejar de actuar, sin importarme abandonar ese motor que me habรญa hecho vibrar y vivir durante tantos aรฑos. Pasรฉ semanas enteras tirada en la cama, sin otro deseo que morir. El mรฉdico que me tratรณ diagnosticรณ una fuerte depresiรณn, por lo que me aconsejรณ un tratamiento psicolรณgicoโฆ
–ยฟY lo hizo?
–No, ยฟquรฉ podรญa hablar sobre la muerte de un hijo? ยฟAcaso รฉl podรญa hacerlo revivir?
Por unos instantes, la muchacha pizpireta, sin edad, a la que habรญa imaginado bailando y dando piruetas, dio lugar a esta otra, envejecida, entregada a ese recuerdo tan doloroso, que parecรญa anular toda su exitosa carrera como actriz.
–Una vez mรกs, Iankel me puso el hombro e intentando sacarme del abatimiento del que parecรญa no podrรญa salir nunca, nos fuimos a Parรญs, donde representรฉ โIankeleโ, obra teatral que mi compaรฑero habรญa escrito especialmente para mรญ. Este estreno fue el comienzo de una larga gira por Polonia, Viena, Checoslovaquia, Rumania, que me exigiรณ interpretar el papel en 3.000 ocasiones y que me catapultรณ a todos los escenarios de mi paรญs
–Me imagino que cuando volviรณ, debe haber sido un gran รฉxito.
–Sรญ, claroโฆ Aunque recibรญ muchas crรญticas adversas de los puristas del idish que no podรญan aceptar que el idioma estuviera mezclado con palabras en inglรฉs, no querรญan era el lenguaje de los que me vinieron a ver.
Fue entonces que le contestรฉ:
–Sรญ, lo que sucede que muchos que se consideran distinguidos lingรผistas no toman en cuenta que un idioma es algo vivo, que no permanece inalterable, enriqueciรฉndose con los vocablos de los distintos paรญses por los que transita. Tal vez no consideran que el idisch es no es mรกs que un conglomerado de tรฉrminos recopilados en los distintitos pueblos y ciudades, por los primeros juglares que llevaron el teatro en ese nuevo idioma alrededor de Europaโฆ
Molly siguiรณ hablando:
–Por suerte, el suceso que la obra tuvo en la gira europea se repitiรณ en Nueva York, ya que los que la habรญan visto enviaban las mejores referencias a sus amigos y parientes americanos, describiendo la extraordinaria diversiรณn que habรญa sido para ellos presenciar mi actuaciรณn. Esa fue mi mejor publicidad y en 1925, en el escenario neoyorkino, el pรบblico cantรณ conmigo las canciones que yo interpretaba y hasta se reรญan antes de que se produjeron las situaciones cรณmicas. Una vez que la temporada concluyรณ, hicimos una gran gira por todo el paรญs, visitando las ciudades mรกs importantes, siempre a teatro lleno.
–ยฟQuรฉ clase de pรบblico concurra al teatro?
–Todo tipo de clases sociales, pero lo que prevalecรญa eran los mรกs humildes, evidenciados por la condiciรณn de su ropa, que me esperaban a la salida del teatro, manifestando que era la tercera o cuarta vez que habรญan visto la obra. A veces el productor del espectรกculo decidรญa bajar el precio de las localidades en determinados dรญas y entonces se podรญan ver familias enteras, sobre todo en las matinรฉs, quegritaban mi nombre, logrando emocionarme hasta las lรกgrimas y mezclados entre ellos a conocidos gangsters eran Al Capone y su pandillaโฆ.
–Cuando toda esta extraordinaria รฉpoca de bienestar y riqueza llegรณ a su fin, con la crisis de 1929, debimos iniciar una vez mรกs, una nueva gira por Europa que continuรณ en Sudamรฉrica, continente que debo admitir, no tenรญamos el menor conocimiento y que ya lleva una duraciรณn de 6 meses. Pudimos hacereste tournรฉ gracias a la ayuda de un millonario judรญo, Azriel Jusid, que nos dio dinero para dirigirnos a Buenos Aires. Nos habรญa visto en Varsovia en 1922, gracias a que mi marido le habรญa regalado entradas para todas las funciones. En Buenos Aires se habรญa hecho rico fabricando colchones, y por lo cual se lo llamaba el โrey de los colchonesโ, facilitรกndole dinero a nuestro empresario y actualmente actuรกramos en su hermosa ciudad, y debo decir sin falsa modestia que tuvimos gran รฉxito, representando โYankeleโ y โShemendrikโ, acompaรฑado por el gran mรบsico Abe Ellstein en el Teatro Excelsior, durante seis meses a teatro llenoโฆ
–Bueno, Molly, me voy, pero no puedo dejar hacerla la pregunta de rigor, ยฟquรฉ te pareciรณ Buenos Aires?
Volviรณ a reรญrse, como lo hubiera hecho una actriz al finalizar el acto final de una obra:
–ยกCรณmo le gusta que le endulce los oรญdos! ยฟQuรฉ puedo decirle que usted no haya escuchado! Es una ciudad hermosa, de la que deberรญan sentirse muy orgullosas. Con Iankl no podemos dejar de comentar, a pesar de la experiencia obtenido por haber recorrido el mundo entero, que esta ciudad no tiene nada que envidiar a cualquier otra de Europa. Pero ยฟquiere que le diga la verdad? Lo que mรกs me ha sorprendido es su pรบblico, que nos ha tratado con tantas demonstraciones de cariรฑo y entusiasmo con la efusividad propia de los latinos.
Extendรญ mi mano para decirle adiรณs y para mi sorpresa me abrazรณ, besรกndome, con el mismo calor que lo hubiera hecho una รญdishe mame y debo confesar que no pude dejar de emocionarme.
โI didnโt ask you to come in to speak about me, but rather that you know who is coming within a month.โ
โYes, I know already, Maurice Schwartzโs company that will put on Hamlet in the Excelsior Theater, a show that will fill the balconies.”
โWhat I think you donโt know is that on the same voyage is coming a comic actress, who, although I donโt know is going to work with his company, wants to get to know Buenos Aires, since she is making a tour of Latin America.โ
โWho is it?โ
โThe great Milly Picon, a total success on Broadway, though unknown among us.โ
โThatโs not true, ask my mother, who is her favorite actress, every time she goes to the movies.โ
โBut, in general, she is not well known among the actors and directors who are not Jewish, despite the fact she is a great theatrical and silent movie actress in Yiddish as the reviews in the American newspapers attest. Look, the Association of Jewish Actors has decided to greet her at the docks, and it occurred to me that it would be interesting if you went, in your role as a theater critic, as a representative of the Yiddishe Zaitung. Iโm sure that your presence will make her feel very welcome.
Appreciative of his proposal, as soon as I arrived at the dock, I hurried to receive her, and when I saw her come down the landing from the ship, the first thing that impressed me were her enormous eyes, that appeared to not understand the reason for such a warm reception, with the modesty that only the truly great can experience.
A few days after her arrival, the editor of the daily told me that I should do a piece about her, and when I arrived at her lodgings, I was surprised by their simplicity, in contrast with the luxury hotels in which Maurice Schwartz, Joseph Buloff and Jacob Ben-Ami had chosen. She was waiting for me in the lobby, and a I had hardly seen her, when I became aware of the current of friendliness that was established between us.
We took the elevator that took us to her lodgings, that consisted of a bedroom and a small sitting room. Almost immediately after entering, I saw on her small table, some photos of her and her husband.
After we sat down on two comfortable cushions, she offered me a glass of whiskey, which I refused, accepting, instead, a delicious cup of tea. I took advantage of that moment to begin my reporting, in which I hardly had to ask questions, since she began to relate her story as if I were an old friend.
She had been born on the Lower East Side, a poor neighborhood of New York, her family having come from Kiev. Her father had immigrated first, abandoning his family of three children. Many years would pass before Molly would meet her brothers during a tour of Europe. They were extremely poor, so, she decided to help them immediately, promising them to do the impossible so that they could travel to the United States, where they would find more opportunity for work.
She had an terrible childhood, because when they came to America, the mother had to work as a seamstress in a music-hall theater. The little girl, only four, observing the members of the cast, began to imitate them, singing the songs that they performed. One of them, seeing the acting of the future โstar,โ suggested to the mother that she introduce the girl to the producer of the company. That same day, on the bus trip home, she delighted the riders with the performance of her own show, for which she collected her first cachet of four dollars,as a drunk was in charge of passing the hat.
That was the beginning of her career, since then, they called on her to act all the girlโs roles, necessary in many works. Every time she took part in any contest, she won first place, always.
As she was telling her story, her large eyes began to fill with tears, shining so much that she appeared to again be that girl who had been born in 1898, and had to leave Elementary School, very soon, because of the poverty in her home, obliging her to work for three years, doing variety shows, traveling to small cities and unknown towns, most often receiving meagre salaries, depending on the success of the show and the current empresario, who kept almost all the earnings. On reaching 20, at the end of a failed season in Boston, she met the man who would be her companion for 58 years, Jacob Karlich (Yankel), a well-off producer, and thanks to him, she entered the Yiddish theater from which she would never leave. After a period of living together, she was pregnant, and they decided to marry. But, sadly for her, she lost her child before it was born, something from which she would never be able to recover, as she showed, almost at the edge of tears.
At this point in the story, Molly couldnโt continue speaking, the emotion overwhelming her. And when she began again, she wasnโt the same. She seemed to me to suddenly grow old, but recovering, almost immediately, thanks to her ability as a great actress.
โNobody who hasnโt gone through such a terrible moment, can imagine that so hopeless a situation. Nothing interested me and I even thought of leaving acting, without caring about that motor that had made me vibrate and live for so many years. I spent entire weeks lying in bed, without any wish but to die. The doctor who treated me, diagnosed a deep depression, and advised a psychological treatmentโฆโ
โDid you do it?โ
โNo, what could he say about the death of a child? Could he make it live again?โ
For a few instants, the lively girl, ageless, whom I had imagined dancing and doing pirouettes, gave way to this other, aged one, brought out by that so painful memory, that seemed to annul all her successful career as an actress.
โOnce more, Iankel took charge of me, intending to take me out of the dejection from which it didnโt appear that I would ever get over. We went to Paris, where I played โIankele,โ a theatrical work that my companion had written especially for me. This show was the beginning of a long tour of Poland, Vienna, Czechoslovakia, Rumania, that forced me to do the role on 3,000 occasions, and that catapulted me to all the stages of my own country.โ
โI imagine that when you returned, it must have been a great success.โ
โYes, certainlyโฆ Though I received many bad reviews from the Yiddish purists who couldnโt accept that the language was a mixed with words in English. They didnโt want the language of those who came to see me.โ
โIt was then that I answered her: โYes, what happens is that many who consider themselves distinguished linguists donโt consider that a language is something living, that doesnโt remain unchangeable, enriching itself with words from the different countries though which it passes. Perhaps they donโt understand that Yiddish is no more than a conglomeration of terms compiled by the first entertainers that brought theater in that new language around Europeโฆโ
Molly continued speaking:โ Luckily, the success that the work had during the tour of Europe was repeated in New York, since those who had seen it sent their highest comments to their friends and American relatives, describing the extraordinary enjoyment that attending my acting had given them. That was my best publicity, and, in 1925, on the New York stage, the audience sang along with me the songs that I sang and even laughed before the comic situations took place. Once the season ended, we did a grand tour through the entire country, visiting the most important cities, always with the theater full.โ
โWhat sort of audience came to the theater?โ
โAll social classes, but the most common were the poorest, shown by the condition of their clothing, who awaited me at the theater exit, letting me know that this was the third or fourth time that they had seen the work. At times, the producer of the show, decided to lower the price of the seats on certain days. Then, you could see entire families, especially at the matinees, who shouted my name, bringing me to tears, and mixed with them were known gangsters such as Al Capone and his gangโฆ
โWhen all this incredible period of well-being and riches came to its end with the crisis of 1929, we had to start out once again on a new tour of Europe that went on to South America, a continent of which I ought to admit, we didnโt have the slightest knowledge, and which went on for six months. We could do this tournรฉ, thanks to the help of a Jewish millionaire, Azreil Jusid, who gave us the money to go to Buenos Aires. He had seen sus in Warsaw in 1922, thanks to my husband who had given his tickets to all the shows. In Buenos Aires, he had gotten rich by making mattresses, for which they called him โThe Kind of the Mattresses.โ He facilitated the money for our producer and now we act in your beautiful city, and I must say, without false modesty, that we were very successful, putting on โYankeleโ and โSchemendrick,โ accompanied by the great musician Abe Ellstein in the Excelsior Theater, for six months with the theater fullโฆโ
โWell Molly, Iโm leaving, but I canโt avoid asking you the required question: โHow do you find Buenos Aires?โ
She laughed again, as if she were an actress finishing the final act of a work:
โHow do you like my sweetening your ears! What can I say that you havenโt already heard! It is a beautiful city, of which all of you should be very proud. Yankel and I canโt stop saying that, despite the experience gained by traveling all over the world, that this city has nothing to envy in any European city. But do you want me to tell you the truth? What has most surprised me the most is your people, who have treated us with affection and enthusiasm with the effusiveness of all the Latins.โ
I extended my hand to say goodbye and to my surprise, she hugged me, kissing me with the same warmth of a Yiddishe Mama, and I must confess that I couldnโt keep from being thrilled.
Harry Hochstaet naciรณ en La Paz, Bolivia, hijo de sobrevivientes de la Shoah. Cruzรณ con su familia las fronteras por Villazรณn hacia Buenos Aires. Estudiรณ el arte en la Universidad Nacional de Pueyrredรณn y psicologรญa en la Universidad de Buenos Aires. Fue por muchos aรฑos, el director del Hogar Infantil, una instituciรณn de la comunidad judรญa de la Argentina, donde innovรณ prรกcticas para tratar y educar a huรฉrfanos y niรฑos pobres. Aรฑos mรกs tarde, fundรณ el Jardรญn de Infantes y la Escuela de la Aldea, ambos distinguidos por sus tรฉcnicas creadoras de la educaciรณn.
_______________________________________
Harry Hochstaet was born in La Paz, Bolivia, the son of Shoah survivors. He crossed the borders with his family through Villazรณn towards Buenos Aires. He studied art at the National University of Pueyrredรณn and psychology at the University of Buenos Aires. For many years, he was the director of the Children’s Home, an institution of the Jewish Community in Argentina, where he innovated practices to treat and educate orphans and other poor children. Years later, he founded the Kindergarten and the Village School, both distinguished for their creative techniques of education.
______________________________________________
De:/From: Harry Hochstaet. Cuentos para un viernes a la noche. Buenos Aires: Editorial Vinciguerra, 1996.
Maxi estaba por iniciar los cursos preparatorios para ingresar al secundario. Siempre habรญa sido buen alumno, pero nunca haba superar sus miedos a los exรกmenes.
Por aquel entonces, como mucho antes, la idea de la existencia de Dios lo inquietaba. Tenรญa distintas formas de imaginรกrselo. Recordaba que de chico habรญa tomado de forma de un perrito chiquito y blanco, al que dormรญa aferrado en su misma almohada,,,
Despuรฉs, ya en la escuela, fue la bandera a la que seโ encomendabaโ en esas maรฑanas frรญas, formado en fila, baldosa por medio en el patio de la escuela. Sobre todo, cuando lo esperaba una lecciรณn difรญcil. Y, ademรกs, bueno, en fin, un montรณn de cรกbalas de la niรฑez, como la de llevar pateando una piedra hasta la escuela sin que รฉsta cayera del cordรณn de la veredaโฆ una manera de garantizar buena suerte.
Pero รฉsta no era una mรกs de sus preocupaciones por la existencia de Dios. Apareciรณ, justamente cuando debรญa rendir su ingreso a la secundaria.
Su papรก estaba leyendo y fumando una pipa como era habitual, cuando รฉl le preguntรณ a la boca de jarro:
–ยฟPapรก, tรบ piensas que Dios existe?
El papรก se restregรณ la barba como lo hacรญa habitualmente, cuando de improviso no sabรญa quรฉ contestar.
Sin darle tiempo le dijo: –ยกSi es asรญ, me gustarรญa verlo!
El papรก intentรณ sonreรญrse, pero adivinรณ en los ojos de Maxi que esto era muy serio; no era la primera vez que lo sorprendรญa con algo asรญ. Decidiรณ entonces charlar con รฉl para saber a quรฉ se debรญa este planteo repentino. Le propuso dar una vuelta. Era ya de noche cuando salieron, una cรกlida noche de diciembre.
Maxi se sentรญa muy orgulloso de que su padre pusiera tanto interรฉs, e incluso hubiera interrumpido su lectura. รl tampoco sabรญa muy bien por quรฉ habรญa formulado esa pregunta justo en ese momento.
Caminaron varias cuadras sin hablar enfilando hacia el parque. La noche era estrellada y tranquila e invitaba a caminar. Los pasos de ambos resonaban claros en la vereda. Cuando el papรก le dijo:
–Bueno, ahora cuรฉntame todo.
ยกTodo! Maxi no sabรญa quรฉ era todo. Ni siquiera recordaba bien cรณmo habรญa llegado a esto. El papรก se suponรญa que se trataba de un gran momento, asรญ que se decepcionรณ cuando Maxi le planteรณ simplemente:
–Papรก, quiero encontrarme con Dios.
–ยฟQuรฉ quiere decir esto? ยฟQuiere una prueba de su existencia?
Perdรณname, papรก, pero nunca me gustaron las cosas de โsegunda manoโ. Yo quiero ver a Dios personalmente.
Ahรญ fue cuando el padre creyรณ entender un poco lo que pasaba. Ahora estaba todo mรกs claro y al mismo tiempo mรกs oscuro que nunca. Tal vez en la mente de toda la humanidad y de cada uno de los hombres debe haber cruzado este deseo. pero ยฟpor quรฉ justamente ahora?, y ยฟpor quรฉ en Maxi?
El papรก fue mรกs lejos que esto y pensรณ que Maxi estaba a punto de dejar atrรกs la niรฑez, entrando en la adolescencia y รฉste era uno de los grandes temas que se le planteaban.
Maxi se animรณ a confesarle que le preocupaba el examen de ingreso. Una prueba de fuego. Era blanco o negro. Si lo aprobaba se podrรญa sentir orgulloso de sรญ mismo, y asรญ se sentirรญan su padre, su madre y el resto de la familia.
Pero si le iba mal, eso querรญa decir que hasta ahora todo habรญa sido una gran farsa y que para su vergรผenza y alivio ha terminado.
Siguieron caminando en silencio, uno al lado del otro, seguros de que รฉste era uno de los momentos mรกs importantes de su vida.
Al rato el padre saliรณ de del asombro y le dijo:
–De modo que quieres ver a Dios. ยฟVes las estrellas allรญ arriba?
–Sรญ, las veo.
–Hay millones. Se mueven en una orden determinada, sin alteracionesโฆ
–Como un relojโdijo.
–Piensaโdijo el papรกโque si ni hubiera un sistema de trรกnsito en la ciudad que ordene la circulaciรณn, los autos chocarรญan entre sรญ a menudo, ยฟno es asรญ?
–Asรญ es
–Pues hay un sistema de trรกnsito que hace que las estrellas puedan moverse del mismo modo: ยกรse es Dios!
Se quedรณ pensativo y al rato dijo:
–Quizรกs no choquen entre sรญ porque estรกn muy lejos una de la otra. O puede ser que antes hubiera mรกs, no estaban suficientemente separadas y se destruyeron entre sรญ. Las que quedaron tendrรญan todo el espacio que necesitan. Tal vez por eso no chocan entre sรญ ahoraโฆ
–Puede que haya sido asรญโdijo el padre.
Esto siempre รฉl admiro de รฉl. Que pudiera respetar lo que รฉl pensara, aunque no coincidieran.
A continuaciรณn, le contรณ una historia:
–Habรญa un rey admirador de รญdolos, bastante mala persona, que le dijo a un rabino que sรญ no mostraba a su Dios al dรญa siguiente en la corte, harรญa rodar su cabeza por las calles. Entonces el rabino le contestรณ: –ยกCรณmo no, poderoso rey! Pero antes ven afuera, a la luz del sol. Quiero mostrarte algoโ
El rey accediรณ y saliรณ afuera con รฉl.
โObserva ahora el sol, gran reyโ, dijo el rabino.
El soberano quiso hacerlo, pero no pudo. Tratรกbase de una ciudad muy lejana donde el sol cae muy fuerte casi todo el aรฑo.
โNo puedo mirar el sol. Me lastima los ojosโ, acabรณ por admitir el rey.
โPues bienโsentenciรณ el rabino–. ยฟcรณmo pretendes ver cara a cara a Dios si ni siquiera puedes mirar al sol, que no es mรกs que una de tantas cosas que รl hizo?โ
Maxi ni dio seรฑales de estar conmovido por la narraciรณn.
–ยฟNo sacas ninguna conclusiรณn? โpreguntรณ el padre.
–Sรญ, pero no me satisface.
–ยฟNo te satisface, dices?
–No, papa.
–Bueno, ยฟpor quรฉ?
–Porqueโฆ ยฟNo dice en algรบn lado de la Biblia que los antiguos profetas solรญan hablar con Dios cara a cara?
–Asรญ lo dice.
–Entonces, ยฟpor quรฉ no puedo yo tambiรฉn ver a Dios?
El padre lo tomรณ la mano, bajรณ mucho el tono de su voz y en secreto le dijo:
–Esto que te voy a decir queda entre nosotros y no debes comentarlo con nadie. ยกPero con nadie! Si realmente quieres ver a Dios puedes hacerlo, pero debes estar absolutamente y decidido que asรญ sea.
Maxi no podรญa creer lo que oรญa, le parecรญa estar tocando el cielo con las manos, y asรญ se lo dijo. Le asegurรณ que no estaba bromeando y que debรญa intentarlo.
–Ademรกsโagregรณโes importante que sepas que a veces Dios estรก muy ocupado para atender a la gente y envรญa un representante personal. ยฟEntendido?
–Entendidoโcontestรณ resueltamente, esperando en su momento poder reconocer al representante.
El papรก le dijo entonces como si adivinara su pensamiento:
–Quรฉdate tranquilo que llegado el momento sabrรกs distinguirlo, pero recuerda, ni una palabra a nadie, ni siquiera mamรก.
Maxi era el mejor alumno del curso, incluso creo, que de la escuela y siempre habรญa sido. Tal vez eso lo movรญa a confundir cualquier error como un fracaso. Y todo fracaso con algo muy vergonzante que lo hacรญa perder rรกpidamente su autoestima, haciรฉndole creer que no servรญa para nada.
Era por eso que nunca le fue mal en una prueba ni en una lecciรณn. Evidentemente este examen de ingreso lo tenรญa a mal traer. Nunca habรญa sido egoรญsta con sus conocimientos y aportaba generosamente al resto de sus compaรฑeros lo que sabรญa.
Desde que su padre le dio esas recomendaciones comenzรณ a rezar silenciosa pero continua e intensivamente, pidiรฉndole a Dios que le ayudara y no le hiciera pasar una desgracia tan grande como reprobar ese examen.
Su mamรก le decรญa tal vez era demasiada exigencia para รฉl. Pero el sabรญa que podรญa rendirlo, sรณlo que estaba muy asustado.
Repetรญa una y otra vez a Dios que no le hiciera perder el tiempo, sin darle pruebas de su existencia.
Pero Dios no se aparecรญa.
Entonces llegรณ el momento en que Maxi pensรณ ser que Dios hubiese decidido que รฉl no aprobaba sus exรกmenes y que no quisiera aparecerse por simple vergรผenza de hacerlo. El temor lo impulsรณ entonces a estudiar con mรกs entusiasmo.
Los primeros exรกmenes fueron brillantes. Maxi pensรณ
que Dios le hacรญa probar el dulce al principio, para someterlo luego a las pruebas mรกs difรญciles. Sus rezos, aunque improvisados, se hicieron mรกs frecuentes y profundos.
Llegรณ a pensar que la maestra, la seรฑora Marta, de mentรณn afilado y sus ojos amenazantes, podรญa usada para la conspiraciรณn que presentรญa, dado su carรกcter gruรฑรณn y desaprensivo.
Por fin terminaron los exรกmenes finales y una semana despuรฉs debรญa pasar por los resultados.
Esa maรฑana se levantรณ muy temprano. Querรญa darle a Dios una รบltima oportunidad.
Cuando doblรณ la esquina, sรณlo faltaban unas cuadras: comenzรณ a rezar fervorosamenteโฆ:
โยกOh Dios, dentro de tres minutos doblarรฉ la รบltima esquina! Estos minutos son muy importantes para ti, porque si no te muestras, tendrรฉ que dudar de tu existenciaโฆ Pero entonces tambiรฉn deberรฉ dejar de creer en mi padre, porque รฉl me dijo que te verรญa si rezaba y lo hacรญa con suficiente intensidad. ยกOh, Diosโฆ Permรญtame que te vea! ยกAhora mismo!
Maxi se parรณ temblando y algo transpiradoโฆ Si no veรญa a Dios estaba seguro de no haber aprobado los exรกmenes.
Pero si lo veรญa, ยฟquรฉ podrรญa hacer o decirle? Despuรฉs de todo nunca lo habรญa visto antes.
O tal vez sรญ. Cuando dormรญa con su perrito blancoโฆ O veรญa izar la bandera en el patio de la escuelaโฆ Incluso cuando se hacรญa la promesa de llegar a la escuela pateando una piedra sin que รฉsta cayera del cordรณn de la veredaโฆ
No, pero esta vez era distinto.
Retoma marchaโฆ ya estaba casi sobre la esquina, una vez que doblara, todo habrรญa acabadoโฆ
–ยกOh Dios! โdijo entonces–. Quizรก he estado pidiรฉndote demasiado. Tal vez te encuentres muy ocupado, como dijo mi padre. Si realmente lo estรกs, ยฟpor quรฉ no me envรญas un representante?… ยกCualquier representante, aunque sea viejo, bastarรก!
Llegรณ la temida esquina.
–ยกOh Diosโinsistiรณ por รบltima vez–, ahora voy a doblar en la esquina. ยกEnvรญame tu representante! ยกQue se encuentre justamente aquรญ! Que lleva una barba larga y negra. ยกPor favor, Dios, ยกpor favor!
Respirรณ hondamente, apretรณ sus puรฑos y doblรณ la esquina.
Y habรญa allรญ un hombre. Y tenรญa una barba larga y negra.
No sabรญa quรฉ hacer. Lo observรณ desconcertado. Cuando notรณ su excitaciรณn, le sonriรณ y le preguntรณ:
–ยฟQuรฉ hora es hijo?
–La nueve, mi seรฑor โtartamudeรณโฆSabรญa por supuesto que รฉl se cercioraba a la hora para poder informarle con precisiรณn a Dios, acerca de la tarea cumplida.
Se acariciรณ su larga barba negra, alzรณ sobre sus hombros un gran fardo que parecรญa contener algo asรญ como carpetas, y se alejรณ.
Maxi no sabรญa quรฉ hacer asรญ que se limitรณ a inclinarse respetuosamente y contemplarlo hasta que doblรณ la esquina. Entonces entrรณ en la escuela que estaba a unos pasos de allรญ.
Habรญa aprobado el curso con las mรกs
altas calificaciones, y hasta la seรฑora Marta lo felicitรณ.
Esa noche cuando llegรณ a su casa, abriรณ como siempre la puerta, parecรญa no haber nadie, y todo estaba en su lugar como si no lo esperaran.
La verdad es que esto lo decepcionรณ porque tenรญa ganas de gritar y abrazar a todos, contรกndolos de su felicidad.
Fue justamente en ese momento que, como en un sueรฑo, todas las luces encendieron y por todas partes aparecieron su papรก, su mamรก, sus primos y amigos, y por fin pudo compartir su alegrรญa: ยกSu promociรณn al secundario!
Antes de sentarse a la mesa servida con un montรณn de cosas ricas, aprovechรณ un descuido para acercarse a su padre y decirle al oรญdo: โViste, papรก, aprobรฉ y tambiรฉn vi alโฆrepresentanteโ.
____________________________________________
Isaac Luria, HaAri
Cabalista/Kabbalist
__________________________________________
โThe Representatives of God Have Beardsโ
Maxi was about to begin the preparatory course for entering high school. He had always been a good student, but he had never been able to overcome his fear of exams,
One night, alone with his father, he took advantage of the chance to begin one of the long chats that they held โabout life,โ that they had from time to time. He loved these conversations almost as much as his father did. Their reflexive and tranquil rhythm, the possibility of listening, had always fascinated them.
At that time, as much earlier, the existence of God worried him. He had different ways of imagining him. He remembered that as a child, God had taken on the image of a little white dog, to which he held tight on his pillow, while he slept.
Later, already in school, it was the flag to which he โpledged himselfโ on those cold mornings, standing in line, placed in the middle of the schoolโs patio. Especially, when he expected a difficult lesson. And, so, in short, a bunch of childhood guesses, like that of kicking a rock all the way to school without letting it fall in on the breaks in the sidewalkโฆ a way of guaranteeing good luck.
But this wasnโt just another of his worries about Godโs existence. It happened, just when he was about to take the high school admissions test.
His papa was reading and smoking a pipe as usual, when Maxi asked him straight out: โPapa, do you think God exists?โ
The father stroked his beard as he did habitually, when surprisingly he didnโt know what to answer.
Without giving time for an answer, Maxi said, โIf thatโs so, Iโd like to see him.โ
The papa started to smile, but he saw in Maxiโs eyes that this was very serious: it was not the first time he had surprised him with something like that. He then decided to chat with him to find out what caused this sudden proposition. He suggested they take hot December night.
Maxi felt very proud that his father was so interested, and he had even interrupted his reading. Neither did he know why he had formulated that question at that very moment.
They walked for several blocks without speaking, heading for the park. The night was starry and quiet, and it was inviting for a walk. The steps of both resonated clearly on the sidewalk. The papa said to him:
โOkay, tell me everything.โ Everything! Maxi didnโt know what everything was. He didnโt even remember well how it had come to this. The father supposed that it had to do with a great moment, so he was disappointed when Maxi simply proposed:
โPapa, I want to meet God.โ
โWhat does that mean? Do you want a proof of his existence?
โForgive me, papa, but I never like โsecond handโ things. I want to see God personally.
It was at this point that the father believed he understood a bit of what was happening. Now, everything was clearer and at the same time more obscure than ever. Perhaps through the mind of all humanity and in every person must have crossed this wish, but, why right now? And why Maxi?
The father went further that this and thought that Maxi was about to leave childhood behind entering adolescence, and that was one of the great themes facing him.
Maxi brought himself to confess that he was worried about the entrance exam. A test of fir. It was black or white. If he passed it, he could feel proud of himself, and his mother and his family would feel so too.
But it if came out badly, that would mean that everything up until now had been a great farce and for his shame and relief hand ended.
They kept on walking in silence, one beside the other, sure that this was one of the most important of his life.
After a while, the father got over his amazement and said to him: โSo, you want to see God. Do you see those stars there above?
โYes, I see them.โ
โThere are millions of them. They move in a determined order, without alterationsโฆโ
โLike a clock,โ he said.
โThink: sad the father โthat if there were no transit system in the city that controlled the circulation, the cars would often hit each other, isnโt that so.
โโ It is.โ
He remained thoughtful, and after a while, he said.
โPerhaps they donโt crash into each other because they werenโt far from each other, and they destroyed each other. Those that remained had all the space they needed. Maybe thatโs the reason they donโt crash into each other now.โ
โThat could be so,โ said the father.
This he always admired of him. That they could respect what the other thought, even if they didnโt agree.
Then, he told him a story:
โThere was a king, an admirer if idols, a rather bad person, who told a rabbi that if he didnโt show his God the next day in the court, he would make his head roll down the streets. Then the rabbi answered him: โOf course, powerful king! But first look outside, in the sunlight. I want to show you something.โ
The king agreed and went outside with him. โNow observe the sun, great king,โ the rabbi said.
The sovereign tried to do so, but his couldnโt. They were in a city very far from here where the sun was very strong for almost all year. โI canโt look at the sun. It hurts my eyes,โ the king admitted.
โWell,โ declared the rabbi, โhow can you pretend to see God face to face, if you canโt ever look at the son, which is nothing more than one of so many things that He made?โ
Maxi showed signs of not being moved by the narrative.
โDidnโt you come to any conclusion?โ the father asked.
โYes, but it doesnโt satisfy me.โ
โIt doesnโt satisfy you; you say?โ
โNo, Papa.โ
โWell, why not?โ
โBecauseโฆ Doesnโt it say someplace in the Bible that the ancient prophets used to talk to God face to face?โ
โSo it says.โ
โThen why canโt I too see God?โ
The father took him by the hand, lowered his voice a great deal and, in secret, he told him:
โIโm going to tell you something that must stay between us, and you must not repeat it to anyone! Anyone! If you want to see God you can do so, but you must be absolutely certain that thatโs what you want to do.โ
Maxi couldnโt believe what he heard. It seemed to him that he was touching the sky with his hands, and he said that to himself. He assured his father that he wasnโt kidding and that he was determined to do it.
โAlso,โ he added, โitโs important to know that sometimes God is too busy to deal with people, and he sends a personal representative. Understood?โ
โUnderstood,โ he said resolutely, hoping that at the right time he would recognize the representative.
The father then spoke as if he guessed his sonโs thoughts: โDonโt worry, when the moment arrives, you will know how to recognize him. But remember, not one word to anyone, not even mama.
Maxi was the best student in the class,
Including, I believe, of the whole school, and he always had been. Perhaps that caused him to see any error as a failure, and every failure with something very shameful that made him quickly lose his self-confidence., making him believe that he was worthless.
For that reason, he never did poorly on a test or a lesson. Evidently, this entrance exam had made him irritable. He had never been selfish with his knowledge, and he generously helped his classmates with what he knew.
Since his father gave him those suggestions, he began to pray silently, but continuously and intensely, asking God to help him and not cause him to experience a disgrace as great as failing that exam.
His mother told him that perhaps it was too much for him. But he knew that he could pass, he was only very worried.
Once and again, he repeated to God not to make him waste his time, without giving him proof of his existence.
But God did not appear.
Then the moment arrived when Maxi thought that God must have decided that he would not pass his exams, and that he didnโt want to appear, being ashamed by doing so. The fear then impelled him to study even more enthusiastically.
The first exams went brilliantly. Maxi thought that God was making him taste the sweet, at the beginning, to later submit him to more difficult tests. His prayers, although improvised, became more frequent and deeper.
He came to think the teacher, Miss Marta, with her sharp chin and threatening eyes, could be used for the conspiracy that he felt, given her cranky and unscrupulous character.
Finally, he finished the final exams, and then a week had to pass to get the results.
Or perhaps he had. When he slept with his little white dogโฆ Or seen the flag unfurled in the school patioโฆ Even when he made the promise to arrive at school, kicking a stone without its falling from the edge of the sidewalk.
That morning, he got up very early. He wanted to give God one last chance.
When he turned the corner, only a few blocks were left; he began to pray ferventlyโฆ: โOh God, within three minutes, I will turn the last corner! These minutes are very important for me, because if you donโt show yourself, I will have to doubt your existenceโฆ But then I will also have to stop believing in my father, because he told me that I would see you, if I prayed and did so with enough intensity. Oh, Godโฆ Permit me to see you! Now!โ
Maxi stopped, shaking and a bit sweatyโฆ If he didnโt see God, he was sure he hadnโt passed his exams.
But if he him, what could he do or say to him? After all, heโd never seen him before.
He arrived at the feared corner.
โOh God,โ he insisted for the last time. โNow I am going to turn the corner. Send me your representative! Let him be right here! That he wears a long and black beard. Please God, please!โ
He breathed deeply, tightened his fists, and turned the corner.
And there was a man. And he had a black beard.
He didnโt know what to do. Disconcerted, he watched him.
When he noted the boyโs excitement, he smiled at him and he asked: โWhat time is it, son?โ
โNine oโclock, my lord,โ he stammeredโฆ He knew of course that he was sure of the hour so as to be able to inform God with precision, about the task completed.
He caressed his long black beard, place on his shoulders a large bundle that seemed to contain something like folders, and he moved away.
Maxi didnโt know what to do, so he limited himself to bowing respectfully and contemplating him until he turned the corner. Then he entered the school that was a few steps away.
He had passed the course with the highest grades, and even Miss Marta congratulated him.
That night when he arrived at home, he opened the door as always, it seemed that nobody was there, and everything was in place as if they were not expecting him.
The truth is that this disappointed him because he wanted to shout and hug everyone, telling them of his happiness.
It was just at that moment that, as in a dream, all the lights went on and from everywhere, his father his mother, his cousins and friends, and he finally could share his joy! His promotion to high school.
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย Before sitting at the table loaded with lots of tasty things, he took advantage of a distraction, to come near his father and to say into his earโ โLook, papa, I passed, and I also say the โฆ representative.
Para Alicia Segal, La fotografรญa ha sido uno de sus intereses fundamentales. La cรกmera ha sido su compaรฑera permanente. Fue miembro de foto-clubes. Su necesidad de aprender la acercรณ a Horacio Coppola y Grete Stern, de quien fue discรญpula, asistente y curadora. Trabajรณ por medios de Argentina y del exterior y para instituciones comunitarias. Ha ejercido la docencia de fotografรญa. Realizรณ muchas exhibiciones en Buenos Aires, Jerusalรฉn, Nueva York, Boston y Parรญs.
For Alicia Segal, photography has been one of her fundamental interests. The camera has been her permanent companion. She was a member of photo-clubs. Her need to learn brought her closer to Horacio Coppola and Grete Stern, of whom she was a disciple, assistant, and curator. He worked for media in Argentina and abroad and for community institutions.She taught. She has had many exhibitions in Buenos Aires, Jerusalem, New York, Boston, and Paris.
Noemรญ Cohen es escritora argentina (Buenos Aires, 1956). Reside en Madrid. Es abogada y escritora. Exiliada en Mรฉxico durante la dictadura militar. Tras su retorno a Argentina, sus actividades profesionales la llevaron a vivir varios aรฑos en Washington. Asesorรณ en temas sociales a diversos gobiernos, fue funcionaria de la Organizaciรณn de Estados Americanos (OEA( y consultora de la Organizaciรณn Internacional del Trabajo (OIT), y del Banco Interamericano de Desarrollo (BID). Fue directora de Relaciones Internacionales de la Biblioteca Nacional de Argentina entre 2003 y 2006. Fue columnista del periรณdico Miradas al Sur. Noemรญ Cohen publicado las novelas Mientras la luz se va (2005), La esperanza que no alcanza (201) y Los celebrantes (2022).
____________________________________
Noemรญ Cohen is an Argentine writer (Buenos Aires, 1956). She lives in Madrid. She is a lawyer and writer. She was exiled in Mexico during the military dictatorship. After her return to Argentina, her professional activities led her to spend several years in Washington. She advised various governments on social issues, was an official of the Organization of American States (OAS) and a consultant to the International Labor Organization (ILO), and the Inter-American Development Bank (IDB). She was director of International Relations of the National Library of Argentina between 2003 and 2006. She was a columnist for the newspaper Miradas al Sur. Noemรญ Cohen has published the novels Mientras la luz se va (2005), La esperanza que no alcanza (2013) and Los celebrantes (2022)
De/From: Cuando la luz se va. Buenos Aires: Editorial Losada, 2005.
โLa partidaโ
La tarde en que Sara le dijo que el dรญa siguiente irรญan juntos a una tienda en el otro extremo de la Ciudad Vieja a comprar telas para bordar, supo que su madre habรญa aceptado el pedido del primo Jaime; una vida cambiarรญa y nada podรญa decir. Desde pequeรฑa, escuchรณ historias y pareceres sobre el primo que vivรญa solo desde hacรญa quince aรฑos en la Argentina, un lugar lejano cuyo nombre no podรญa pronunciar y en donde, se decรญa en la familia, nadie era pobre. Tambiรฉn se decรญa que el primo era buen mozo, rubio y trabajador; pero era imposible que ella recordara algo, apenas tenรญa unos meses de haber nacido, cuando รฉl que tenรญa veinte aรฑos, dejรณ la casa familiar y se fue primero a Francia y luego a Sudamรฉrica.
Sara era viuda y tenรญa cinco hijos, tres de ellos mujeres, todos nacidos en Alepo. Ella era de Alejandrรญa, habรญa podido ir a la escuela, donde aprendiรณ a leer y escribir y hasta algo de francรฉs. En cambio, sus hijas, un poco por la costumbre del lugar y otro poco por la miseria, no sabรญan leer y sรณlo los varones fueron al colegio y hablaban francรฉs. Las chicas se dedicaron a ayudarla en la casa y Elena ademรกs aprendiรณ a tallar bronce; hacรญa armoniosos diseรฑos que luego eran vendidas por el primo Faud en su bazar, al lado de la Sinagoga del shuk.
Cuando Elena comenzรณ a trabajar, cincelaba en bronce dibujos con sรญmbolos judรญos; tenรญa un gran sentido de la proporciรณn de las formas, pero era analfabeta, y aรบn no se le habรญa ocurrido que podรญa dejar de serlo. Aรฑos despuรฉs, ese deseo se transformarรญa en una obsesiรณn, pero eso es otra historia. En cambio, conociรณ muy pronto los sรญmbolos de los otros porque los dueรฑos de los bazares vecinos al de Faud pidieron piezas decoradas con diseรฑos islรกmicos y las representaciones cristianas para vender a cualquier que pasara por las calles del shuk y no sรณlo a los judรญos que salรญan de la sinagoga.
Al decorar las piezas de bronce con tan diferentes signos, aprendiรณ el sentido de la armonรญa, supo el arte de combinar las formas, aprendizaje que le permitirรญa transitar la vida con la placidez de quien sabe que todo es mutable, aceptรณ algunas virtudes que hacen bueno a quien las tiene. Aunque tambiรฉn aprendiรณ, viendo a su tรญo Faud negociar con los otros comerciantes, que no siempre eran virtuosas las relaciones con los extraรฑos y menos aรบn en cuestiones de comercio.
Sara habรญa criado a sus hijos en la tradiciรณn y la รฉtica sefardรญes; les enseรฑรณ a ser solidarios y honestos, a distinguir lo puro de lo impuro, lo limpio de lo no limpio y, por sobre todas las cosas, les hablรณ de la recta razรณn que guรญa las acciones de una buena persona. Principios sencillos de aplicar, ayudan distinguir el bien del mal en las cosas concretas de la vida diaria y hacรญan previsibles las conductas. Transmitiรณ esa herencia de verdades absolutas como si fuera parte de la naturaleza, como los hรกbitos de comida o higiene; no comer cerdo o no mezclar la carne y leche, descansar por el sรกbado, lavarse las manos antes de comer y, para las mujeres, ir todos los viernes al hamman; era el orden de su mundo y no se le ocurrรญa que sus hijos lo pensaran distinto.
Al dรญa siguiente de anuncio de la aceptaciรณn del pedido de mano, madre e hija comenzaron las caminatas por los barrios de la Ciudad Vieja donde vivรญan los judรญos; en sus callecitas transitadas por camellos y mulas, pobladas por los gritos de los vendedores de habas, de aceitunas o de menta fresca, por las cinco llamados sonidos del almuecรญn que salรญan de los minaretes, รบnicas construcciones sobresalientes en esa laberรญntica ciudadela. Subรญan y bajaban por esos paisajes angostos y polvorientos, debรญan conseguir todo lo necesario para prepara el ajuar y organizar la partida de Alepo. Elena no sabรญa que habrรญa de viajar a un mundo tan distinto del suyo. โAlepo, La Blancheโ, le decรญan los franceses a la ciudad, tal vez por sus casas blancas con balcones de piedras talladas en estilo andaluz, o tal vez por vestigios de un nombre que significaba de leche en arameo, herencia de una leyenda que seรฑala a ese sitio como el lugar donde detuvo a ese sitio como el lugar donde se detuvo Abraham para alimentar a su rebaรฑo o tal vez la otra, que cuenta sobre los antiguos de la
La primera salida fue para la casa de Marcos, el hermano mayor de Jaime, a buscar el giro postal enviado desde la Argentina. Les convidaron un tรฉ con hojas de menta, muy azucarada, propiciatorio de las dulzuras que le vendrรญan a la pequeรฑa, segรบn dijeron los parientes, quienes, a pesar de su pobreza, tambiรฉn habรญan preparado una bandeja de trufas, un manjar de lujo guardado en el sรณtano para una ocasiรณn que mereciera celebrarse con tal exquisitez. Entre bendiciones y vaticinios de una prole numerosa de hijos varones, aconsejaron a su madre dรณnde comprar mejor las telas y objetos diversos que serรญan para el ajuar
Una maรฑana salieron temprano para ir hasta la avenida principal; en la tienda de un primo segundo compraron la seda blanca para hacer tres camisones y una bata, seda de color curdo para otro, una pieza de lino blanco para confeccionar seis juegos de sรกbanas y cuatro manteles, lino muy fino color salmรณn para dos camisones, muchos metros de puntilla blanca, y una pieza color natural de encaje de Bruselas. Otro dรญa fueron hasta el shuk, para ir al negocio de otro primo, donde compraron tres alfombras. A Elena, la que mรกs le gustรณ fue una que ademรกs del tradicional borde de diseรฑos geomรฉtricos multicolores sobre un fondo marrรณn, tenรญa un centro de rombos recortados en azul y rojo oscuro. Era la mรกs cara y tambiรฉn la que le parecรญa mรกs linda; pensรณ en ponerla arriba de un divรกn de su futura casa. Con las otras dos, cubrirรญa los colchones en los dormitorios; aรบn no sabรญa que en el otro lado del mundo las alfombras eran sรณlo usadas en el piso. Esa alfombra que tanto le gustรณ tendrรญa el extraรฑo destino trashumante de algunos objetos y serรญa llevada de ciudad en ciudad, con la impronta de algo portador de buena suerte.
La salida mรกs importante fue ir a la joyerรญa. Deslumbrada, encargรณ dos anillos de oro, uno con un rubรญ y el otro con una aguamarina y los aros haciendo juego. Eligiรณ tambiรฉn una pulsera de oro con un ancho broche central en el que se unรญan cadenas muy finitas y donde se podรญan agregar otras mรกs que quedaban sostenidas por ese centro. Esa pulsera serรญa su adorno permanente y fascinarรญa aรฑos despuรฉs a sus nietas. La verรญan condimentar las comidas mientras ese oro en movimiento parecerรญa un llamado a la gloria de los sabores inminentes. Como a toda mujer oriental, a Elena le gustaban los brillos y si eran joyas mรกs aรบn, pero dada la pobreza en la que vivรญa, sรณlo le era posible mirarlas en las vitrinas de los negocios, donde quedaban petrificadas como un niรฑo hambriento ante una vidriera de dulces. Con el transcurrir de la vida, su deseo se realizaba con frecuencia, pero las vitrinas de las joyerรญas le siguieron produciendo siempre ese mismo efecto de encantamiento. Ese dรญa fue distinto, eligiรณ a su gusto mientras sonreรญa pensado en el ruidito de sus pendientes y en el efecto del brillo en medio de su pelo rojo. Mientras, recordaba los dichos de las mujeres de su familia: si un hombre quiere a su mujer debe regalarle joyas, sobre todo oros, muchos oros, porque รฉl es el protector contra los males. Le gustaba repetir para llamar a la buena suerte: Tocando oro y mirando la lunaโ.
En cuatro semanas, debรญa tomar el vapor hacia Marsella, desde donde embarcarรญa hacia la Argentina. Ese nombre era un sonido sin significado; en cambio, la intrigaba Jaime. Pensaba en รฉl todo el tiempo mientras bordaba las prendas del ajuar disfrutando del rumor de la costura y del contacto del encaje y la seda en sus manos jรณvenes estropeadas por el cincel, aรบn torpes para los trabajos mรกs delicados.
Por la tarde, las mujeres de la familia y las vecinas sacaban sus sillas bajas al patio de la casa grande; repitiendo gestos y dichos que habรญan visto en sus madres y sus abuelas, se reunรญan alrededor de la novia para ayudarle en la costura del ajuar. Ella cosรญa, acompaรฑada en silencio las risas y cuchicheos mientras trataba de encontrarle un rostro a su futuro marido de quien no tenรญa siquiera una foto. Sentรญa una mezcla de nostalgia anticipada y alivio; ya no iba a tener tardes de algarabรญa como รฉsas, pero se iba a casar con un hombre rico que la esperaba para cuidarla y darle todo lo necesario. El amor llegaba despuรฉs, repetรญan desde siempre los dichos familiares, sentencia inapelable para consolar a las niรฑas ante las bodas arregladas con desconocidos y el miedo de la soledad prematura
No sabรญa nada de hombres, pero desde pequeรฑa aprendiรณ que el deber de la mujer era cuidar a su marido, cocinarle y darle hijos varones, tambiรฉn alguna mujer. Aunque hacรญa largo tiempo que Jaime vivรญa entre los otros, ella pensaba seguramente que era un buen hombre, como los de su familia, a pesar de algunos muy festejador de mujeres u otros entusiastas jugadores de cartas. Ayudarรญa a ese hombre si habรญa desviado; le habรญan enseรฑado que sรณlo a travรฉs de la mujer bendiciones de Dios son concedidas a una casa, y el hogar es bendito cuando la mujer atiende a los destinos de la familia y que el hombre tambiรฉn serรก bendito y vivirรก el doble de los aรฑos cuando ame y honre a su esposa.
A sur madres y a sus tรญas les gustaba repetir que los hombres no podรญan estar solos. ยฟCรณmo lavar, planchar o cocinar? Sรณlo aprendieron a ir al negocio, donde hablaban y, gracias a las palabras, cobraban dinero, Era necesario que tuvieran una mujer al lado para ser buenos, limpios y felices. Si ellas les decรญan a que ellos les gustaba, les hacรญan ricas comidas y algunas otras cosas, ellos despuรฉs cumplรญan con la voluntad de sus mujeres. Habรญa aprendido a hacer algunas comidas; conocรญa el placer del sabor al morder la masa crocante de un quipe, la textura aterciopelada del hummus o la dulzura hรบmeda y crujiente de una baclawa, pero no sabรญa cuรกles serรญan esas cosas que provocaban risas y murmullos en las tรญas y en mamรก mientras se juntaban en el patio de la casa grande, cuchicheando con complicidad mientras cocinaban para las fiestas, como luego tambiรฉn lo hicieron para preparar el ajuar.
Se iba sola y muy lejos a casarse con un desconocido. Nadie le preguntรณ si estaba de acuerdo; sรณlo tuvo permiso para elegir alguna joya, un adorno para su futura casa o una alfombra. Elena creyรณ que debรญa hacer algunas preguntas antes de partir, porque cuando estuviera lejos ninguna de las mujeres de la familia podrรญa responderle y, entonces, se atreviรณ a susurrar que necesitaba sabe cรณmo era eso de cumplir con el marido para conseguir despuรฉs todo lo deseado.
The afternoon in which Sara told her that the next day they would go together to a shop at the other end of the Old City to buy cloth to embroider, she knew that her mother had accepted the request from Cousin Jaime; her life would change, and she couldnโt say anything. From when she was little, she heard stories and opinions about the cousin who lived alone in Argentina for fifteen years, a faraway place whose name she couldnโt pronounce and where, within they family they said no one was poor. It was also said that the cousin was a good man, blond, a hard worker However, it was impossible that she remembers anything about him, she was barely a few months old, when he, at twenty, left the family home and went first to France and then to South America.
Sara was a widow with five children, three of them women, all of them born in Alepo. She was from Alexandria, had been able to go to school, where she learned to read and write and even some French. On the other hand, her daughters, in part because of the customs of the place and another part because of poverty, didnโt know how to read and only the boys went to school and spoke French. The girls dedicated themselves to help her at home, and Elena learned how to engrave bronze; harmonious designs that were then sold by Cousin Faud in his Bazar, at the side of the Synagogue of the shuk
When Elena began to work, she engraved bronze pictures with Jewish symbols; she had a fine sense of the proportion of the forms, but she was illiterate, and it had never occurred to her that she could begin to stop being so. Years later, this desire would be transformed into an obsession, but thatโs another story. Instead, the quickly learned the symbols of the others, as the owners of the bazars neighboring Faudโs asked for pieces decorated with Islamic designs and Christian representations to sell to anyone who passed through the streets of the shuk and the not only to the Jews leaving the synagogue.
Decorating the pieces of bronze with such different signs, she learned a sense of harmony, she learned the art of combining forms, an apprenticeship that allow her to go through life with the calmness of somebody who knows that everything is mutable. She took on some virtues that do well for whoever has them. Although she also knew, watching her cousin Faud negotiate with the other merchants, who were not always virtuous in their dealings with strangers, even less when dealing with business.
Sara had raised her children in the Sephardic tradition and ethics; she taught them to be caring and honest, to distinguish the pure from the impure, and most of all, she spoke to them of the upright reason that guides the actions of a good person. Simple principles to apply, they help in distinguishing the good from the evil in the concrete things of daily life that guide the actions of a good person and made conduct to be expected. She transmitted that inheritance of absolute truths as if it was part of nature, like the habits of food and hygiene, to not eat pork or mix meat and milk, rest during the Sabbath, wash hands before eating, and for the women, to go every Friday to the hamman; it was the order of her world and it never occurred to her that her children might think differently.
The first outing was to Marcosโ house, Jaimeโs older brother, to seek the postal order sent from Argentina. They invited them to have tea with mint leaves, heavily sugared, propitiatory to the sweets that would come to the little one, according to what her relatives said, who, despite their poverty, also had prepared a tray of truffles, a luxury food kept in the basement for an occasion that merited that was worthy of a celebration with such a delicacy. Between prayers and predictions from numerous offspring of boys, the advised her mother where to better buy the cloths and various objects that would be for the dowry.
One morning, they left early to go as far as the principal avenue; in the store of a second cousin, they bought the while silk to make three nightgowns and a bathroom, Kurdish-colored silk for another, a piece of white linen to sew into six pairs of sheets and four tablecloths, salmon-colored fine linen, and a piece of natural-colored Belgian lace. Another day, they went as far as the shuk, to negotiate with another cousin, where they bought three rugs. Elena liked best the one that went beyond the traditional borders of geometric design of multi-color geometrical designs on a maroon base, it had a center of uneven diamonds in blued and dark red. It was the most expensive and it also was the prettiest, she intended to put it above a couch in her future home. With the other two, she would cover the mattresses in the bedrooms; she did yet know that in the other side of the side of the world, rugs were used only on the floor. That rug that she liked so much, would have the strange human nomadic destiny that some objects do, and would be carried from city to city with the imprint of something that carries good luck.
The most important trip was to the jewelry store. Dazzled, she ordered two gold rings, one with a ruby and the other with an aquamarine and earrings to match, she also chose a gold bracelet with a wide central clasp in which brought together very fine chains and where she could add others that were held by the center. That bracelet with be her permanent adornment and years later would fascinate here granddaughters. They would see her season the dinners while that gold in movement seemed a call to the glory of the imminent flavors. Like all Eastern women, Elena loved sparkles, and if they were jewels, so much the better, but given the poverty in which she lived, it was only possible for her to look at them through store windows, where they remained petrified, like a hungry child before a store window of candy. With the passing of life, her desire was frequently fulfilled, but the jewelry store windows always produced in her the same feeling of enchantment. That day was different. She chose as she pleased, while she smiled thinking about the little sounds of her pendants and the effect of the shine in the middle of her red hair. Meanwhile, she remembered the sayings of the women of her family. If a man loves a woman, he ought to give her jewels, especially gold ones, lots of gold one, because he is the protector against evil. She liked to repeat to call for good luck: Touching gold and looking at the moon.
In four weeks, she had to take the steamship to Marseille, from which she would embark for Argentina. That name was a sound without meaning; in contrast, Jaime intrigued her. She thought about him all the time, while she sewed the clothing for the dowry, taking advantage of the sounds of the sewing and the contact with the lace in her young hands, damaged by the chisel, still awkward for contact of the lace, still clumsy for the most delicate jobs.
In the evening, the women of the family and neighbors, took out their low chairs to the patio of the great house; repitiendo gestures and saying that they had seen in their mothers and their grandmothers gather around bride to help her with the sewing of the dowry. She sewed, accompanied in silence the laugher, and whispering, while she tried to find the find a face for her of her future husband of whom she didn’t even have a photo. She felt a mixture anticipated nostalgia and relief; she still wasnโt ready. She still wasnโt ready to have an afternoon of rejoicing, like those, but she was going to marry a rich man who was waiting to take care of her and give her everything necessary. Love comes later, the family sayings repeated from time immemorial, a unappealable maxim to console the girls before arranged marriages with unknown men and the fear of premature solitude.
She knew nothing about men, but since she was a little girl, she learned that the responsibility of her husband, cook for him ad give him male children, also a girl. Although Jaime had lived a long time among others, she thought that surely, he was a good man, like those of her family, despite some who played around with women or others who played cards too much. She would help that man is he had strayed; they had taught her that only through the woman are Godโs benedictions conceded to a home, and it is blessed when the woman attended to the future of the family and the man will also be blessed and will live twice the number of years when he loves and honors his wife.
Her mothers and her aunts liked to repeat that men canโt live alone. Wash, iron or cook? The only learned to go to business, where they talked. And thanks to their words, earned money. It was necessary that they had a woman at their side in order to be good, clean and happy. If they said to them what they wanted to hear, made them delicious dinners and some other things, they will then go along with the will of their wives. She had learned to make some meals; she knew the pleasure of taste, when biting into the crispy dough of a quipe, the velvety texture of hummus or the damp and crunchy sweetness of baklava, but she didnโt know what those things that provoked laughter and murmurs among the aunts and mama, could be, when they got together on the patio of the big house, gossiping with complicity while they were cooking for parties, and then they did so while preparing the dowry.
She was going alone and very far to marry and unknown man. No one asked her if she agreed; she only had permission to choose a jewel, an adornment for her future house or a rug. Elena believed that she should ask some questions before leaving, because when she was far away, none of the women of the family could answer her and then, she dared to sigh that she needed to know about how to fulfill her husband, so to obtain all that was later wished for.
Nora Strejilevich es una escritora y profesora argentina cuyo principal interรฉs es el genocidio contemporรกneo. Ella es una sobreviviente exiliada de un campo de concentraciรณn, y su experiencia enmarca tanto su escritura como su investigaciรณn. Tras ser liberada del โClub Atlรฉticoโ (1977), se exiliรณ polรญticamente en Canadรก, donde realizรณ un posgrado y terminรณ un Ph.D. en literatura latinoamericana en la Universidad de Colombia Britรกnica. Enseรฑรณ en Canadรก y Estados Unidos (1991-2011), principalmente en la Universidad Estatal de San Diego, y su enseรฑanza se centrรณ en el discurso testimonial. Mรกs recientemente, trabajรณ en la Universidad de Chile (Santiago, 2012) y en el Centro de Estudios sobre Genocidio de la Universidad Tres de Febrero en Buenos Aires. La Universidad de Konstanz en Alemania la invitรณ a colaborar con su equipo de investigaciรณn en Terror Narratives and Disappearance (2013-2014). Ha impartido el seminario de posgrado โViolencia de Estado y Literaturaโ para varias instituciones como la Universidad de Milรกn con el apoyo de la Beca Fulbright y la Universidad de Middlebury en Buenos Aires (2014-2015). Sus cuentos publicados en inglรฉs son โInventoryโ, โAnamesisโ y โToo Many Namesโ (narraciรณn autobiogrรกfica). Fue galardonada con el Premio Internacional Letras de Oro. Su testimonio, Una sola muerte numerosa (1997, 2006, 2007) le dio reconocimiento internacional, y fue traducido al inglรฉs como A Single Numberless Death (2002) y al alemรกn, Ein einzelner vielfacher Tod (2014). Fue adaptada al teatro y recibiรณ un premio en EE.UU. (Michigan, 2002). Tambiรฉn ha inspirado una docu-ficciรณn, Nora (Italia 2005). Este libro sirve como material pedagรณgico en Argentina, Colombia, Chile, Mรฉxico, Brasil, Alemania, Austria, Italia y Francia. El arte de no olvidar: literatura testimonial en Chile, Argentina y Uruguay entre los aรฑos 80 y 90 (2006) es un ensayo crรญtico que analiza, desde un enfoque sociocultural, textos de literatura testimonial. El lugar del testigo y Un dรญa, allรกpor el fin de mundo son unos de sus trabajo mรกs recientes.
Nora Strejilevich is an Argentine writer and professor whose main interest is contemporary genocide. She is an exiled survivor of a concentration camp, and her experience frames both her writing and research. After being freed from โClub Atleticoโ (1977), she became a political exile in Canada, where she did postgraduate work and finished a Ph.D. in Latin American literature at the University of British Colombia. She taught in Canada and the US (1991-2011), mostly at San Diego State University, and her teaching focused on testimonial discourse. Most recently, she worked at Universidad de Chile (Santiago, 2012) and at the Center for Genocide Studies at Universidad Tres de Febrero in Buenos Aires. Konstanz University invited her to collaborate with their research team about Terror Narratives and Disappearance (2013-2014). She has taught the graduate seminar, โState Violence and Literatureโ for several institutions such as Milan University with support from Fulbright Fellowship and Middlebury University in Buenos Aires (2014-2015).Her published short stories in English are โInventary,โ โAnamesisโ, and โToo Many Namesโ (an autobiographical narration.) She was awarded the Premio Internacional Letras de Oro. Her testimony, Una sola muerte numerosa (1997, 2006, 2007) gave her international recognition, and it was translated into English as A Single Numberless Death (2002) and into German, Ein einzelner vielfacher Tod (2014). It was adapted to theater and received an award in the US (Michigan, 2002). It has also inspired a docu-fiction, Nora (Italy 2005). This book serves as pedagogical material in Argentina, Colombia, Chile, Mรฉxico, Brazil, Germany, Austria, Italy and France.El arte de no olvidar: literatura testimonial en Chile, Argentina y Uruguay entre los 80 y los 90 (2006) is a critical essay which analyses, from a socio-cultural approach, texts of testimonial literature. El lugar del testigo y Un dรญa, allรกpor el fin de mundo are some of her later works.
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“Cuando me robaron el nombre”
fui una fui cien fui miles
NN era mi rostro despojado
y no fui nadie
de gesto de mirada de vocal.
Camino mi desnudez numerada
en fila sin ojos sin yo
con ellos sola
desangrando mi alfabeto
por cadenas guturales
por gemidos ciudadanos de un paรญs
sin iniciales.
Pรกrpado y tabique
mi horizonte
todo silencio y eco
todo reja toda noche
todo pared sin espejo
donde copiar una arruga
una mueca un quizรกs.
Todo punto y aparte.
Hasta un dรญa
me devolvieron el nombre
y salรญ a lucirlo por los pasillos
del mundo.
Mรกscaras encontrรฉ
paรญses perfiles adormecidos
lenguas golosas de novedades
absurdo.
Me dejรฉ caminar asรญ
hacia mi ningรบn lugar
hacia mi nada
por desfiladeros de huellas
sin rocรญo
sin poder traducir
mis cicatrices.
ยกEse nombre no es mรญo!
El mรญo
era cien era mil era todos
el mรญo
era cuerpo era vientre era voz
tenรญa vecinos silbaba
Se me ha perdido el nombre!
por las veredas de un mapa
era un dios.
sin esquinas gritรฉ
era diurno y nocturno
entre puertas acribilladas de miedo.
ยกQuiero mi nombre!
mi nombre propio curvo palpitante
ยกQue me lo traigan!
envuelto en primaveras
con rr de rayuela
o con o de ojalรก
con a de aserrรญn asserรกn.
Mi nombre enredadera se enredรณ
Entre sรญlabas de muerte
DE SA PA RE CI DO
ido
nombre nunca mรกs
mi nombre.
Enajenada de sujeto
no supe conjugarme
no supe recorrer
el abecedario de mis lรกgrimas.
Fui ojos revolviendo ayeres
fui manos atrapando jirones
fui pies resbalando
por renglones elรฉctricos.
No supe pronunciarme.
Fui piel entre discursos
sin saliva sin vestigios
de donde ni por quรฉ
Ni cuando ni hasta cuando.
No podrรกs jamรกs decirlo!
jamรกs decirte, pensรฉ.
Pero escribirรกs
Escribirรฉ sรญ
Miles de ges de eres de eses
garabatos vicarios
hijos de mi boca
remolinos de deseos
que fueron nombres.
Escribirรฉ
lรกtigos negros para domar
otras salvajes mayรบsculas
ahogรกndome la sangre.
Resistirรฉ resistirรกs
con nombre y apellido
el descarado lenguaje
del olvido.
NN No Name
Rayuela Hopscotch Aserrรญn aserrรกn – juego popular
Cรฉsar Tiempo (1906-1980) fue un poeta, escritor, autor teatral, guionista cinemaยญtogrรกfico, y periodista. Con el nombre de Israel Zeitlin, naciรณ ucraniana, y como bebรฉ fue llevado a Buenos Aires En 1924 obtuvo la ciudadanรญa argentina. Formรณ parte del Grupo de Boedo. En 1930 obtuvo el Premio Municipal de Poesรญa. Recibiรณ el Premio Nacional de Teatro. En 1945 ganรณ el Premio Municipal al Mejor Libro Cinematogrรกfico. Entre 1973 y 1975 se desempeรฑรณ como director del Teatro Nacional Cervantes. Entre sus obras teatrales destacan Pan criollo y El lustrador de manzanas. Escribiรณ sobre la condiciรณn judรญa y porteรฑa. Libro para la pausa del sรกbado, Sabatiรณn argentino, y Sabadomingo son algunos de sus poemarios.
Cรฉsar Tiempo (1906-1980) was a poet, writer, playwright, screenwriter, and journalist. Born Israel Zeitlin, in the Ukraine, he was brought to Buenos Aires as an infant. In 1924, he became a citizen of Argentina. He was a member of the Boedo Writers Group. In 1930, he won the Municipal Prize for Poetry. In 1945, he won the Municipal Prize for Best Screenplay. Between 1973 and 1975 he served as director of the Cervantes National Theatre. Among his plays are Pan criollo y El lustrador de manzanas. He wrote sensitively about the Jewish community of Buenos Aires. Libro para la pausa del sรกbado, Sabatiรณn argentino, and Sabadomingo figure among his books of poetry.
Polifacรฉtico autor argentino, Marcelo Birmajer es novelista, escritor de cuentos, periodista cultural, ensayista, escritor de relatos, autor teatral, humorista, traductor… algunos de sus guiones cinematogrรกficos han recibido premios com el Oso de Plata o el Premio Clarรญn. Como periodista, ha colaborado en numerosos periรณdicos y revistas de habla hispana.
En su vertiente como novelista, Birmajer se caracteriza por tratar frecuentemente temas y personajes judรญos (ese era su origen), con finas descripciones y con gran sentido del humor. En la periodรญstica, sus ensayos y artรญculos, estรกn muy bien documentados y analizados con rigor.
Birmajer ha recibido varios premios, entre ellos el White Ravens, traduciรฉndose sus obras a varios idiomas.
_____________________________________________
Multifaceted Argentine author, Marcelo Birmajer is a novelist, short story writer, cultural journalist, essayist, short story writer, playwright, humorist, translatorโฆ some of his film scripts have received awards such as the Silver Bear or the Clarรญn Award. As a journalist, he has contributed to numerous Spanish-language newspapers and magazines.
In his novelist side, Birmajer is characterized by frequently dealing with Jewish themes and characters (that was his origin), with fine descriptions and with a great sense of humor. In journalism, his essays and articles are very well documented and rigorously analyzed.
Birmajer has received several awards, including the White Ravens, and his works have been translated into several languages.
De:/From: Marcelo Birmajer. El Club de las Necrolรณgicas. Buenos Aires: Sudamericana, 2012, pp. 17-24.
UN HOMBRE RICO
Genaro se habรญa hecho rico por su propia cuenta. Provenรญa de un sรณlido hogar de clase media, a su vez levantado de la nada por su padre. Pero รฉl habรญa llegado a ser un hombre rico, desahogado, con la capacidad de decidir quรฉ dรญa y en quรฉ momento trabajar; su poder, sus contactos, eran logros exclusivamente personales. De hecho, representaban una ruptura con la vida esforzada y fatigosa de su padre y su madre.
El abuelo paterno, Jacinto Dabar, aunque recibรญa el mote de โturcoโ como cualquier sefaradรญ, provenรญa de Siria, especรญficamente de Damasco. Habรญa dejado una esposa allรก, y consiguiรณ otras dos en la Argentina. A sus dos familias mantenรญa vendiendo exquisiteces orientales en un carrito ambulanteโcon la inscripciรณn โMaijlefโ–: lasamachรญn, kipe, murrak, bureka, kedaife. Cuando la esposa siria llegรณ a reclamar su parte, la sumรณ a pensionadas.
Como a la abuela de Gernaro, Raquel, y la otra esposa, Manuelaโambas judรญas sefardรญes–, Jacinto las habรญa conocido al mismo tiempo, no habรญa prioridades ni bastardos; o todos eran legรญtimos o ninguno era. Pero mientras que los hijos de Manuela eran cinco, Lรกzaro era el รบnico. Raquel dio ese รบnico hijo sin dificultades; pero como si el vientre hubiera advertido antes que la propia mujer con quiรฉn ella se habรญa casado, luego de Lรกzaro se tornรณ yermo.
De modo que Jacinto considerรณ que Manuela y su prole precisaban una casa; mientras que Raquel y su hijo, Lรกzaro, podrรญan vivir en un conventillo. Todos habitan en el barrio de Flores. Lo que inicialmente podrรญa haber parecido una desventaja, en ningรบn caso un desprecio, para Raquel y Lรกzaro, acabรณ siendo un privilegio: porque cuando llegรณ la esposa siria, Menesa (al menos ese era su nombre en la Argentina), con sus dos hijos, Jacinto no tuvo mรกs remedio que ubicarla en la misma casa que ocupabanโliteralmente ocupaban, en el sentido de que no le pertenecรญa a Jacinto ni pagaba legalmente un alquiler–, Manuela y sus cinco hijos. Allรญ Jacinto dormรญa noche por medio, y hacรญa uso indiscriminado de sus dos esposas, confundiรฉndoles el nombre. Era bueno con los chicos.
Hasta Genaro recordaba con cariรฑo a su abuelo, por los pocos aรฑos que lo tuvo cerca; el olor a almรญbar en sus manos, los dedos parecรญan otra masita oriental. Sus abrazos delicados y sus palabras en ladino. Pero Lรกzaro lo odiaba. Le habรญa dado una infancia horrible. Escapando a Siria cuando su nieto tenรญa cinco aรฑos, Jacinto abandonรณ en la Argentina a sus tres esposas y sus tantos hijos. Y el carrito.
En el 48, mรกs corrido por las turbas de Damasco que por sus propias ganas, alcanzรณ fronteras con del reciรฉn nacido Israel, fue uno mรกs de los 6.000 muertos, el uno por ciento de la poblaciรณn judรญa, caรญdos en la guerra de Independencia. Pero ni siquiera esta muerte permitiรณ a Lรกzaro reconciliarse al menos con el recuerdo de su padre, su cerebro y corazรณn se dedicaron a una รบnica aventura: conseguir una casa propia.
Aunque Lรกzaro nunca lo explicitรณ, el oficio que asumiรณโun verbo, para el caso, mรกs adecuado que โeligiรณโera indudable una herencia paterna.
Trabajรณ de cadete de peleteros afortunados, de los textiles de las calles Nazca y Avellaneda, fue repartidor de diarios, y llegรณ a atender un negocio en el Once. En el Once conociรณ sus dos รบnicas certezas: el barrio en el que querรญa alzar su casa, y la mujer con la que deseaba pasar la vida.
Genoveva era blanca, tranquila, inteligente, pero no iluminista, con sentido comรบn, de escondida sensualidad, nada ostentosa, ama de casa que no negaba su feminidad puertas adentro. Lรกzaro repitiรณ durante medio siglo que Dios le habรญa quitado como hijo se lo habรญa dado como marido. Los padres de Genoveva efectivamente provenรญan de Smirna, Turquรญa, y eran mรกs ilustrados que los de Lรกzaro. Pero el empuje, la fuerza, el tesรณn con que Lรกzaro persiguiรณ sus obsesionesโsu casa, su mujer, su barrio–, no podรญa ser opacado por libros ni jerarquรญas; ni siquiera por generaciones. Aunque le hubiera gustado llevar un destino profesional, arquitecto o ingeniero, una tarde de lluvia, todavรญa trabajando en el Once y viviendo en un departamento alquilado en Floresta, con Genoveva ya casados, ella cocinรณ lasmashรญn por primera vez como esposa, el aroma convocรณ a unos vecinos y naciรณ lo que con el tiempo llegarรญa a llamarse El Imperio de Sefarad.
Por motivos no aclarados, Lรกzaro heredรณ el carrito de Jacinto. Pero no lo quiso conservar, y lo vendiรณ a un botellero. En cambio, como ya se dijo, sin reconocerlo, se quedรณ con el oficio. Primero se encargรณ de comprar las materias primas para Genoveva y ella vendรญa, en casa, a los vecinos, que se acercaban a la ventana. Pero a Lรกzaro no le gustaba que su esposa entrara en contacto, a solas, con tantos extraรฑos. La fama de los lasmashรญn crecรญa, y Genoveva no daba abasto. Lรกzaro consiguiรณ trabajo en un puesto de diarios, casi por el mismo dinero que le pagaban en el negocio de tela, tambiรฉn en el Once, con la ventaja de atender el kiosko de tres de la maรฑana a doce del mediodรญa, y llegar a casa para trabajar codo a codo con Genoveva. Con este nuevo arreglo, el matrimonio apostรณ por mรกs: kedaรญfes. A pedido del pรบblico, extendieron el repertorio a todo lo que habรญa vendido Jacinto: kipe, murrak, bureka. Ya estaba todo inventado. No sin รกvergรผenza, Lรกzaro se vio obligado a comprar un carrito; con alegrรญa contratรณ un cadete. Entonces abandonรณ el puesto de diarios, pero no su sueรฑo de vivir en el Once.
Le pusieron El Imperio de Sefarad. Existe una pizzerรญa, clรกsica de los judรญos askenazรญes de Villa Crespo, llamada Imperio tambiรฉn. Allรญ coinciden los judรญos comunistas y los cuentapropistas, que inicialmente festejaron juntos la creaciรณn de Israel, y luego en 1956, cuando la URSS se puso hostil contra el estado judรญo, y mucho mรกs de lo que ya era contra los judรญos en general, se separaron. Pero el Imperio de Canning y Corrientes continuรณ como territorio neutral, alternรกndose los dรญas de visitas los judรญos pro-soviรฉticos y los judรญos a secas.
Lรกzaro quiso abrir su propio Imperio, donde coincidirรญan todos los judรญos sefaradรญes, sin distinciรณn de ideas ni orรญgenes, lo mismo los turcos, incluso libaneses, franceses e italianos. Lo consiguiรณ por varios motivos: en primer lugar, que no hubo entre los judรญos sefardรญes ninguna zanja ideolรณgica como la que, desde el Exilio hasta nuestros dรญas, atenazaba a los judรญos de la Europa frรญa, neurรณticos y autodestructivos.
Cuando fue posible, frizรณ sus maravillosos productos, y los kipes viajaron a las provincias del Norte, en micros, igual que las telas y las ropas confeccionadas en los talleres de Flores, Floresta y el Once. Los vecinos de Flores y Floresta, y los del Once y Villa Crespo, sin distinciรณn de orรญgenes, acudieron a la casa-despensa de Flores, que muy pronto dejรณ de ser casa y permaneciรณ hasta el final como despensa y restaurante de parado, con dos empleados, mรกs Genoveva y Lรกzaro: El Imperio de Sefarad.
Genero naciรณ en el Once, en la calle Tucumรกn, entre Agรผero y Anchorena, justo al frente al club Macabiโdel que lo nombraron socio vitalicio y al que concurrรญa hasta los 15 aรฑos–, el dรญa que sus padres se mudaron. Lรกzaro nunca dejรณ de considerar un milagro el nacimiento de su primogรฉnito el mismo dรญa que concretaba su anhelo de casa propia en el Once. Genero, en la adultez, reacio a aceptar la mรญstica de su nacimiento, afirmaba: โUn milagro es una casualidad vista por un creyente.โ.
Genaro naciรณ literalmente en casa, y Genoveva fue asistida por una de las seรฑoras de la limpieza y un mรฉdico del club Macabi.
En ese momento, en Floresta, en El Imperio de Sefarad, los comerciantes comรญan de pie, acodados en unos pocos tablones de fรณrmica, durante la pausa del almuerzo.
Genero had become rich by his own means. He came from a solid middle-class home, in turn built from nothing by his father. But he had become a rich man, comfortable, with the ability to decide what day and at what moment to work; his power, his contacts, were exclusively personal achievements. In fact, they represented a rupture from the hardworking and exhausting life of his mother and father.
His paternal grandfather, Jacinto Dabar, even though he had the nickname, โTurk,โ like any Sephardic Jew, he came from Syria, specifically Damascus. He had left behind a wife there, and he obtained two more in Argentina. He maintained his two families, selling oriental delicacies from a movable cartโwith the inscription โMailefโ– lasmachรญn, kipe, murrak, bureka, kedaife. When the Syrian wife arrived to claim her art, he added her to his pensioners.
As for Genaroโs grandmother, Raquel, and the other wife, Manuelaโboth Sephardic Jews–, Jacinto had met them at the same time, there were no priorities or bastards; or they all were legitimate, or none was. But while Manuela had five children, Lรกzaro was an only child. Raquel gave birth to that only son without difficulties, but as if her womb had warned her before the woman herself with whom he had married, after Lรกzaro, he became impotent.
So that Jacinto considered that Manuela and her offspring required a house, while Raquel and her son Lรกzaro could live in a tenement house. They all lived in the Floresta neighborhood. What could initially could have appeared to be a disadvantage, though never a slight, ended up being a privilege: because when the Syrian wife Menesa (at least that was her name in Argentina) with her two kids, Jacinto had no choice than to put her in the same house that occupiedโliterally occupied, in the sense that it didnโt belong to Jacinto nor did he legally pay rent–. By Manuela and her five children. Jacinto slept there for half a night, and he made indiscriminate use of his two wives, confusing their names. He was good with the children.
Even Genaro remembered his grandfather with affection, for the few years that he had him nearby; the smell of syrup on his hands, the fingers that seemed to be another oriental pastry. His delicate arms and his words in Ladino. But Lรกzaro hated him. He had given him a horrible childhood. Escaping to Syria when his grandchild was five, Jacinto abandoned his three wives and their numerous children. And the cart.
In 1948, kicked out by the mobs of Damascus more than by his own wishes, he reached the borders of the recently born Israel, he was one of the 6,000 dead, one per cent of the Jewish population, fallen in the war of Independence. But not even that death allowed Lรกzaro to reconcile himself even with memory of his father, his brain and heart were dedicated to one adventure: getting his own house.
Although Lรกzaro never explicitly stated it, the trade that he assumedโa verb, for the case, more fitting that โchoseโโwas undoubtably a paternal inheritance.
He worked as an errand boy for fortunate furriers, of the textiles of Nazca and Avellaneda Streets, he was a newspaper deliverer and he ended up looking after a business in Once. In Once he encountered his two things, he was certain of: the neighborhood where he wanted to build his house and the woman with whom he desired to spend his life.
Genoveva was white, tranquil, intelligent, but not illuminist, with common sense, of hidden sexuality, not at all ostentatious, housewife who didnโt deny her femininity behind closed doors. Lรกzaro repeated for half a century that what God had taken away from his boyhood, He had given it back as a husband. Genovevaโs parents, indeed, came from Smyrna, Turkey, and were more cultured than Lรกzaroโs. But the spirit, the force, the determination with which Lรกzaro pursued his obsessions–his house, his wife, his neighborhood–, couldnโt be obscured by books or hierarchies, not even by generations. Although he would have liked to follow a professional destiny, architect, engineer, one rainy afternoon, still working in Once and living in an apartment in Floresta, already married to Genoveva; she cooked lasmashรญn for the first time as a wife, the aroma brought forth a few neighbors y was born the which with time would be called El Imperio de Sefarad. [The Empire of Sepharad.]
For reasons that were not clear, Lรกzaro inherited the food cart from Jacinto. But he didnโt want to keep it and he sold it to a junkman. On the other hand, as has already been said, without recognizing it, he already had with a trade. First, he took charge of buying the raw material for Genoveva, and she sold, at home, to the neighbors, who came up to the window. But Lรกzaro didnโt like the idea that his wife come in contact, alone, with so many strangers. The fame of the Lamashรญn grew, and Genoveva couldnโt keep up. Lazaro found a job at a newspaper stand tant paid him almost as much as the fabric store, also in Once, with the advantage of looking after the kiosk from three in the morning to twelve noon and arrive home to work along side Genoveva. With this new arrangement, the couple went further: kedaifes. On public demand, they extended their repertory to include everything that Jacinto had sold: kipe, murrak, bureka. Everything was in place. It was not without embarrassment that Lรกzaro saw himself obligated to buy a food cart; with joy, he hired an assistant. Then I left the news stand, but not his dream to live in Once.
They named it the Imperio de Sepharad. A pizzeria existed, typical of the Ashkenazi Jews of Villa Crespo, also called Imperio. There, the Communist Jews and those of the opposition, who initially celebrated the creation of Israel, and later in 1956, when the USSR became hostile to the Jewish State, and much more than it was already against towards Jews in general, they separated. But the Imperio of Canning and Corrientes continued as neutral territory, alternating the days open to the pro-Soviet Jews and the rest of the Jews.
Lรกzaro wanted to open his own Imperio, where all the Sephardic Jews would meet, without distinction of ideas or origin, the same for the Turks, including Lebanese, French and Italians. He achieved that for various reasons: in the first place because, among the Sephardic Jew, there was no ideological divide like that since the Exile to our times, tormented the Jews from the cold Europe, neurotic and self-destructive.
Whenever possible, they froze their marvelous products, and the kipes traveled in small buses, the same as the fabrics and clothing made in the workshops of Flores y Floresta, and those of Once and Villa Crespo. The neighbors of Flores and Floresta, and those of Once and Villa Crespo, of every background, came to the home-dispensary in Flores, so that soon it ceased to be a home and remained until the end as a dispensary and restaurant in which on stood, with two employees, plus Genoveva and Lรกzaro: El Imperio de Sefaradโ.
Genero was born in Once, on Tucumรกn Street, between Agรผero and Anchorena, right in front of the Macabรญ Clubโto which they named him a life-time member and to which he went until he was 15–, the day that his parents moved. Lรกzaro never ceased to consider it a miracle the birth of his first-born son on the same day that he fulfilled his desire for his own home in Once. Genero, as an adult, unwilling to accept the mysticism of his birth: affirmed โa miracle is a coincidence viewed by a believer.โ
Genero was literally born โat home.โ And Genoveva was aided by a series of cleaning ladies and a doctor from the Macabรญ Club.
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย At that moment, in Floresta, in the Imperio de Sefarad, businessmen ate standing up, bent over a few thick planks of formica, during the lunch break.
Paloma Fabrykant naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1981 y es hija de la escritora Ana Marรญa Shua y del fotรณgrafo Silvio Fabrykant. A sus 13 aรฑos comenzรณ a formarse en las artes marciales, prรกctica que realizรณ de manera profesional a partir de los 30 aรฑos en la MMA. Trabajรณ en el diario Clarรญn y en la Revista Viva. Tambiรฉn colaborรณ en las revistas Para Ti, Cinturรณn Negro Argentina, THC, Metrรณpolis, Hombre, Noticias, La Mano y Rolling Stone y Cรณmo Estar Bien. En televisiรณn introdujo una modalidad para la producciรณn de exteriores que consiste en una sola persona ejerciendo la funciรณn de camarรณgrafo, productor y cronista para el programa GPS de A24. Para Paloma, su recorrido profesional tiene un punto en comรบn que eligiรณ en su edad adulta en busca de โun poco de acciรณn y de adrenalinaโ, tratando de alejarse de la vida acadรฉmica que le proponรญa su familia. โMe di cuenta que esa vida me aburrรญa un montรณn y fue cuando dejรฉ la Facultad de Letras y empecรฉ a vivir el deporte y el periodismo de riesgo, me sentรญ mรกs conectada a una vibraciรณn mรกs intensa de la que me traรญan los libros o la labor intelectualโ.
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Paloma Fabrykant was born in Buenos Aires in 1981 and is the daughter of the writer Ana Marรญa Shua and the photographer Silvio Fabrykant. At the age of 13, she began to train in martial arts, a practice that he carried out professionally from the age of 30 in MMA. She worked in the Clarรญn newspaper and in Viva Magazine. He also collaborated in the magazines Para Ti, Cinturรณn Negro Argentina, THC, Metropolis, Hombre, Noticias, La Mano and Rolling Stone and Cรณmo Estar Bien. On television, he introduced a modality for the production of exteriors that consists of a single person acting as cameraman, producer and chronicler for the A24 GPS program. For Paloma, her professional career has a point in common that she chose in her adulthood in search of “a bit of action and adrenaline”, trying to get away from the academic life that her family proposed to her. โI realized that this life bored me a lot and it was when I left the Faculty of Letters and began to live sports and risk journalism, I felt more connected to a more intense vibration than the one that books or work brought me. intellectual”.
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Luchadora/Fighter
La luchadora de MMA Paloma Fabrykant representa al paรญs: Argentina. Comenzรณ su carrera profesional en 2012. Fabrykant actualmente ha tenido 6 peleas profesionales, de las cuales ganรณ 4 y perdiรณ 2. Participรณ en torneos de promociones como: Heroes MMA, MRWF, Arrogant MMA. Sus oponentes fueron tal luchadoras como: Flor Fonseca, Gloria Castillo, Denise Boifer.
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MMA fighter Paloma Fabrykant represents the country: Argentina. She began professional career in 2012.. Paloma Fabrykant currently has had 6 professional fights, of which she won 4 and lost 2. She participated in tournaments of such promotions as: Heroes MMA, MRWF, Arrogant MMA. Her opponents were such fighters as: Flor Fonseca, Gloria Castillo, Denise Boifer.
Periodista y productora de la televisiรณn/Journalist and Television Producer
“Actualmente trabajo como productora de TV de exteriores, buscando noticias en terrenos hostiles. Me gusta trabajar tanto delante como detrรกs cรกmara, con la voz, la cabeza o el teclado”.
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“I currently work as an outdoor TV producer, looking for news in hostile terrain. I like to work both in front of and behind the camera, with my voice, my head or the keyboard.”
Escritora de libros para niรฑos/Author of children’s books
“A los diecisรฉis, escribiรณ su primer libro de poemas, titulado “Las cosas que odio”, y a los diecinueve publicรณ “Cรณmo Ser Madre De Una Hija Adolescente”. Ese รบltimo libro โlo escribรญ cuando todavรญa estaba bien bajo el ala de mi madre. No me animaba a decir โmamรก no quiero escribirโ. Mi mamรก me decรญa que me iba a presentar en las editoriales, que iba a ser un boom y yo le decรญa โsรญ mamรกโ. Ese libro lo escribรญ yo pero lo craneรณ ellaโ, se acordรณ.
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At sixteen, she wrote her first book of poems, titled “The Things I Hate,” and at nineteen she published “How To Be A Mother Of A Teenage Daughter.” That last book โwas written when I was still well under my mother’s wing. I didn’t dare to say ‘mom I don’t want to write’. My mom told me that I was going to present myself in the editorials, that it was going to be a boom and I said ‘yes mom’. I wrote that book but she brainstormed itโ, she remembers.
Libro de Paloma Fabrykant/Book by Paloma FabryKant
Jacobo Regen naciรณ en Quijano, Salta, (1935 – 2019) donde viviรณ su vida entera. Fue judรญo de nacimiento, pero no fue practicante. Un judรญo solitario; permaneciรณ recluido en sus รบltimos dรญas. En su poesรญa combinรณ su herencia judรญa con su vida en una una provincia remota y llena de ejemplos brutos de la naturaleza. El vendedor de tierra,Poemas reunidos, Antologรญa poรฉtica. El poemario El vendedor de tierra recibiรณ el Primer Premio de Poesรญa del concurso anual para autores editados de su provincia (1984). En 2014, recibiรณ el premio Rosa de Cobre (Biblioteca Nacional Mariano Moreno) (De Umbroso mundo con prรณlogo de Antonio Requeni, Fondo Editorial Secretarรญa de Cultura de la Provincia de Salta, Salta, Argentina, 2013).
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Jacobo Regen was born in Quijano, Salta, (1935 – 2019) where he lived his entire life. He was Jewish by birth, but he was not a practitioner. A lonely Jew; He was a recluse in his last days. In his poetry he combined his Jewish heritage with his life in a remote province full of powerful examples of nature. Among his poetry books are: The Seller of Land, Poems reunited: Poetic Anthology. The collection of poems The Seller of Dirt received the First Prize for Poetry in the annual contest for published authors of his province (1984). In 2014 he received the Rosa de Cobre award (Mariano Moreno National Library) (From World of Shade with a prologue by Antonio Requeni, Editorial Fund of the Culture Secretariat of the Province of Salta, Salta, Argentina, 2013.)
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Su obra poรฉtica se caracteriza por su estilo personalรญsimo y medular, hasta llegar a expresar los temas mรกs trascendentales del hombre”. Centro de Cultura de Salta
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“His poetic work is characterized by his very personal and medular style, to express the most transcendental themes.” Salta Cultural Center
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Poemas de Jacobo Regen/Poems by Jacobo Regen
ANUNCIO
Serรก recompensada la persona
que me devuelva una sonrisa
cuando le diga yo que aรบn la quiero
y que no me importa si me odia
despuรฉs de haberme amado
por equivocaciรณn.
ANOUNCEMENT
The person will be recompensed
who returns a smile to me
when I tell her that I still love her
and it doesnโt matter if she hates me
after having loved me
by mistake.
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FANTASMAS
Tan sรณlo mis fantasmas
saben lo que sucede
conmigo. Yo lo ignoro.
GHOSTS
Only my ghosts
know what happens
with me. I donโt have any idea.
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PALABRAS
Sรณlo te pido que recuerdes
La luz de aquel amanecer
Que hemos amado tanto.
He derrochado contigo
Tantas palabras que creรญste
Ciertas,
Que palpitaban,
Que vivรญan
Y amรฉ en ti mis palabras.
Cuando dejรฉ de amarlas,
Te perdรญ.
WORDS
I only ask that you remember
The light of that dawn
That we have loved so much.
I have squandered with you
So many words that you believed
True ones
That throbbed
That lived
And I loved my words in you.
When I stopped loving them,
I lost you.
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EL VENDEDOR DE TIERRA
Vuelve del horizonte
cargando tierra negra en sus espaldas.
Cuando llega lo aplauden los jardines
y se emociona el agua.
Y yo le compro tierra, y algรบn dรญa
me tendrรก que vender toda la carga.
THE LAND SELLER
He returns from over the horizon
loaded down with black earth on his back.
The gardens applaud him when he arrives
and the water is excited.
and I buy the earth from him, and some day
he will have to sell me the entire load.
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DISTANCIA
No hay distancia mรกs grande
que la que nos separa
del vecino,
del solitario prรณjimo
que generosamente
nos ayuda.
Su lema siempre fue: “lo mรญo es mรญo
y lo tuyo tambiรฉn”.
DISTANCE
There is no greater distance
than that which separates us
from our neighbor,
from the solitary being
who generously
helps us
his motto always was โwhatโs mine is mine
and yours too.
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PROPOSICIรN
ยฟConoces tรบ mi paradero?
Si sabes algo, dรญmelo.
Y cuรฉntame de aquel muchacho candoroso.
Si alguna vez llegas a verlo
No le ocultes que te has casado,
Que tienes varios hijos.
Y nunca te enternezcan
Su terquedad, sus ruegos.
Adรณptalo como criado.
ยกSerรญa tan hermoso para รฉl!
Cuidarรญa el jardรญn de tu casa,
Lavarรญa los paรฑales de tus pequeรฑos,
Saludarรญa humildemente a tu marido.
ยกEs tan bueno!
Pero que tu indulgencia
no vaya nunca mรกs allรก.
PROPOSITION
Do you know my whereabouts?
If you know something, tell me.
And tell me about that naรฏve boy.
I you ever come to see him
Donโt hide that you have married,
That you have several children.
And they never soften for you
Their stubbornness, their pleas,
Adopt him as a servant.
I would be so beautiful for him!
He would take care of your homeโs garden.
He would wash your little oneโs diapers.
H would humbly greet your husband,
He is so good!
But that you indulgence
never go any further.
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UMBROSO MUNDO
Hay jardines que no tienen ya paรญses
Georges Schehadรฉ
Umbroso mundo,
seguiremos siempre
poblando de fantasmas verdaderos
tus paรญses ausentes.
Asรญ, lejos de todo,
crecerรก en el olvido un รกrbol verde
a cuya sombra vamos a dormirnos
hasta que alguna vez el sueรฑo nos despierte.
WORLD OF SHADE
There are gardens that no longer have countries.
Georges Shehadรฉ
World of shade,
we will always go on
populating with true ghosts
your absent countries,
So, far from everything,
a green tree will grow in oblivion
at whose shadow, we will fall asleep
until whenever the dream awakens us.
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TATUAJES
Yo creo en las palabras
que son carne y espรญritu:
tatuajes repujados
a punta de cuchillo.
TATOOS
I believe in the words
that are flesh and spirit:
embossed tattoos
with a knife point
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CORRECTOR
Yo soy, no mรกs, un corrector de pruebas.
No dije nunca nada de mรญ mismo
porque desconocรญa los acentos
que caen en mis vรฉrtebras profundas.
PROOFREADER
I am nothing more than a proofreader.
I never said nothing about myself
because I donโt know the accents
that fall in my deep vertebrae.
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VEJEZ
Vino a cobrarlo todo:
las trampas del amor, sus ademanes,
y estos turbios espejos
que se avergรผenzan de mirar a nadie.
OLD AGE
It came to collect everything:
the snares of love, its gestures
and these turbulent mirrors
that are ashamed to look to at anyone.
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ANECDOTAS
ยฟDรณnde se ahogaron nuestras noches
de sueรฑos para siempre irredimibles?
Sรณlo quedan anรฉcdotas:
pugilatos de torva levadura
y el vino con que ayer amanecรญa
la confidencia del amor
al fondo
de un bar decapitado.
ANECDOTES
Where were our nights of dreams drowned
so that they be forever beyond repair?
Only anecdotes remain:
boxing matches of fierce yeast
and the wine with which yesterday was dawning
the confidence of love
at the bottom of a decapitated
bar.
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ALIANZA
Me quedo en cualquier parte
porque no tengo a dรณnde ir.
Y vuelven mis fantasmas
a inventarme
la luz
entre paredes de agua muerta.
Vuelven
para fundar la รบltima alianza
con el que fui,
con el que nunca ha sido.
Andan ya por mi sangre.
Voy con ellos.
ALLIANCE
I stay anywhere
because i donโt have any place to go.
And my ghosts return to
invent for me
the light
between walls of dead water.
They return
to establish the last alliance
with what I was,
They still walk through my blood.
I go with them.
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HOGUERA
El aire va leyendo
con sus ojos de ausencia
las pรกginas de un libro
que consume la hoguera.
El humo cadencioso
se despide, se alejaโฆ
Lo saludan cenizas
y mariposas muertas.
BONFIRE
The air goes on reading
with its absent eyes
the pages of a book
that the bonfire consumes.
The rhythmical smoke
says goodbye and moves awayโฆ
ashes greet it
and dead butterflies
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OBEDIENCIA
Si alguna vez amรณ
no fue de paso.
Obediente al recuerdo
cerrรณ todas las puertas
de su sangre.
OBEDIENCE
If I once loved you
it wasnโt transient.
Obedient to the memory
It closed all the doors
of your blood
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SOY UN รNGEL
1
Serenamente digo: “Soy un รกngel”.
Y me debes creer.
Ningรบn platillo sube,
o baja,
bajo mi peso.
Incorpรณreo, ligero,
desnudo,
como la luz…
Y sin embargo, toda
mi trayectoria es una sombra,
mi corazรณn es una sombra
una moneda oscura
destruida por el tiempo,
sin tiempo y sin memoria.
Voy con ellos.
I AM AN ANGEL
1
Serenely I say: I am an angelโ
and you ought to believe me.
No plate rises,
or goes down,
under my weight.
Incorporeal, light weight,
Naked,
Like the light…
Nevertheless, all
my trajectory is a shadow,
my heart is a shadow
an obscure coin
destroyed by time,
without time and without memory.
I go with them.
__________________________________
Dos libros de Jacobo Regen/Two books by Jacobo Regen
Silvio Fischbein, 1949, artista visual y director de cine, vive y trabaja en Buenos Aires. Recibiรณ los tรญtulos de Arquitecto, aรฑo 1974 y Urbanista, aรฑo 1980, de la Universidad de Buenos Aires. Es Profesor Consultor de la Universidad de Buenos Aires. Participรณ en la creaciรณn y dirigiรณ las Escuelas Audiovisuales de ORT, Facultad de Arquitectura, Diseรฑo y Urbanismo de la Universidad de Buenos Aires, Facultad de Arte de la Universidad Nacional del Centro. Como guionista y director, realizรณ 30 cortometrajes, 5 largometrajes y 2 videoarte. Obtuvo el Premio George Meliรจs del Gobierno de Francia en 1984. Desde 1965, en las artes visuales, ha realizado 40 exposiciones individuales en el paรญs y en el exterior, y ha participado en salones y exposiciones colectivas. Fue becado en varias ocasiones por los Gobiernos de Canadรก y Francia. Entre otras distinciones, obtuvo la Beca Pollock โ Krasner Foundation, 2015 y 2018. En 2021 obtuvo el 1er. Premio en la 26 Bienal de Arte Textil, Argentina. Presidiรณ en repetidas ocasiones la Asociaciรณn Iberoamericana de Escuelas Audiovisuales y perteneciรณ al comitรฉ ejecutivo de la Asociaciรณn Internacional de Escuelas de Cine y TV, CILECT. Actualmente preside AAVRA, Asociaciรณn de Artistas Visuales de la Repรบblica Argentina.
Silvio Fischbein, 1949, visual artist and film director, lives and works in Buenos Aires. He received the titles of Architect, year 1974 and Urban Planner, year 1980, from the University of Buenos Aires. He is Consulting Professor at the University of Buenos Aires. He participated in the creation and directed the Audiovisual Schools of ORT, Faculty of Architecture, Design and Urbanism of the University of Buenos Aires, Faculty of Art of the National University of the Center. As a screenwriter and director, he made 30 short films, 5 feature films and 2 video art. He obtained the George Meliรจs Prize from the Government of France in 1984. Since 1965, in the visual arts, he has held 40 individual exhibitions in the country and abroad, and has participated in salons and collective exhibitions. He was awarded scholarships on several occasions by the Governments of Canada and France. Among other distinctions, he obtained the Pollock โ Krasner Foundation Scholarship, 2015 and 2018. In 2021 he obtained the 1st. Award at the 26th Biennial of Textile Art, Argentina. He repeatedly presided over the Ibero-American Association of Audiovisual Schools and belonged to the executive committee of the International Association of Film and TV Schools, CILECT. He currently chairs AAVRA, Association of Visual Artists of the Argentine Republic.
Paula Margules naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1959. Es licenciada en Relaciones Humanas y Pรบblicas (Universidad de Morรณn).
Su trabajo:
Pasado. Material con el cual se construye el presente.
Ministerio de Educaciรณn de la Naciรณn Plan de lectura: Asesor externo: Talleres de fomento de la lectura literaria dirigidos a docentes y alumnos de los niveles de primaria y secundaria. 2009 y 2010. Asesora externa, responsable de contenidos del Taller Literario a Distancia (Educ.ar). 2008.
Actividades de Paula Margules
Taller Literario del diario “La Razรณn” en la Feria Internacional del Libro de Buenos Aires Direcciรณn, (2005 a 2007).
Fundaciรณn Avon Direcciรณn del Taller Literario, 2004 y 2005.
“Cartas desde Buenos Aires”, revista literaria Miembro del Equipo Asesor y colaborador. De 2003 a 2008, aรฑo en que falleciรณ la fundadora, Victoria Pueyrredon. Y con รฉl, la publicaciรณn.
“revistas” Revista dominical, columnista, de 2002 a 2005, aรฑo en que cerrรณ la publicaciรณn.
Actividades que construyen el dรญa a dรญa: Bravo.Continental El programa de Fernando Bravo, en esa emisora: am 590 http://www.continental.com.ar Desde enero de 2017 realizo el ‘Espacio Literario’, un segmento dedicado a incentivar la lectura. Hasta agosto de 2019, la periodicidad era quincenal. A partir de esa fecha es semanal.
“AMIJAI, La Revista de la Comunidad” Columnista, desde 2001.
Consejo Profesional de Ciencias Econรณmicas de la Ciudad Autรณnoma de Buenos Aires Miembro del Jurado del Certamen Literario, desde 2007.
__________________________________________
A Portrait of Paula Margules
Paula Margules was born in Buenos Aires in 1959. She has a BA in Human and Public Relations (University of Morรณn/ en Relaciones Humanas y Pรบblicas (Universidad de Morรณn).
Past, material with which the present was built: Ministry of Education of the Nation Reading Plan: External advisor: Workshops to encourage literary reading aimed at teachers and students at primary and secondary levels. 2009 and 2010. External advisor, responsible for contents of the Distance Literary Workshop (Educ.ar). 2008.
Literary Workshop of the newspaper “La Razรณn” at the International Book Fair of Buenos Aires Direction, (2005 to 2007).
Avon Foundation Direction of the Literary Workshop, 2004 and 2005.
“Letters from Buenos Aires”, literary magazine Member of the Advisory Team and collaborator. From 2003 to 2008, the year in which the founder, Victoria Pueyrredon, died. And with it, the publication.
“magazines” Sunday magazine, columnist, from 2002 to 2005, the year the publication closed.
Activities that build the day to day: Bravo.Continental Fernando Bravo’s program, on that station: am 590 http://www.continental.com.ar Since January 2017, I have been doing the ‘Literary Space’, a segment dedicated to encouraging reading. Until August 2019, the periodicity was fortnightly. From that date it is weekly. “AMIJAI, The Community Magazine” Columnist, since 2001.
Professional Council of Economic Sciences of the Autonomous City of Buenos Aires Member of the Jury of the Literary Contest, since 2007.
De; Paula Margoles, Brรบjula al Sur. Buenos Aires; Emecรฉ, 2007.
โEl discursoโ
La multitud–Pese a todo: Buenos Dรญas. Hoy se cumple un aรฑo de la instalaciรณn de esta Carpa, y se cumple un mes de la muerte de Walter Villegas, para algunosโentre los que me cuento, —accidentalmente dudosa. El Kadish, la oraciรณn que los judรญos rezamos por los muertos, es una plegaria de vida, un ruego que pide paz. Por es estoy aquรญ, ante ustedes, quiero expresar mi rezo laico por la vida en paz, por una suerte mejor para nosotros, los docentes, por el recuerdo de Walter Villegas, un hombre siempre lo intentรณ.
La multitud lo aplaudiรณ con fuerza, se escucharon cornetazos y algรบn biombo. David musitรณ โy tal vez se cansรณ. O noโโ Levantรณ las manos pidiendo silencio y continuรณ:
–Soy hijo de la escuela pรบblica como lo fueron mis padres. Y mi abuelo. Una escuela pรบblica era un ejemplo y era orgullo, ejemplo de excelencia y de integraciรณn, porque salvo muy breves periodos, en la escuela pรบblica convivรญamos los Soifer con los Villegas y los Urdinarrain, los Fernรกndez con los Rigolli. Hoy la situaciรณn es muy distinta. Hoy la escuela es marginalidad. Hoy, estamos desde el margen pidiendo por la educaciรณn. Hoy vivimos en el margen araรฑando los renglones para no caernos.
Hubo aplausos, un grito de โbravoโ y un larguรญsimo cornetazo. David insistiรณ con los gestos pidiendo silencio. Un nuevo acople al micrรณfono sacudiรณ las piedras. Despuรฉs, dijo:
–Una democracia es grande y suculenta cuando ademรกs de ejercer sus ventajas, tambiรฉn se hace cargo de los conflictos que genera su desarrollo. Cuando no se preocupa tanto por llegar, sino que se entretiene mรกs en ir. Una sociedad se va haciendo mรกs democrรกtica en la medida en que cada uno de sus miembrosโdesde el primero al รบltimo, hasta completar la naciรณn toda–. Se responzabiliza por sus acciones cรญvicas sin delegar esa funciรณn. Si la sociedad simula su realidad en lugar de asumirla, prevalece la cultura de encubrimiento; la verdad se transforma en una alusiรณn. Y la alusiรณn siempre tiene un sentido desfigurador, desnaturaliza la magnitud del conflicto. De eso, los argentinos sabemos demasiado.
La gente estallรณ en aplausos. Comenzaron a caer algunas gotas. David siguiรณ:
Somos un pueblo condenado a la creatividad. Pero si reducimos el presupuesto de esta alternativa a la invenciรณn de escusas y de mentiras, nuestra capacidad de crecimiento, de desarrollo, de expansiรณn, serรก otro renglรณn en la larga lista de sueรฑos ahogados con la almohada, antes de acostarnos a dormir. Martรญn Buber, Maestro, uno de los grandes de pensadores de nuestro tiempo, filรณsofo siempre preocupado por la condiciรณn humana, creรญa que la nacionalidad no puede ser un fin en sรญ misma. En los primeros aรฑos de este siglo turbulento, Buber dijo: โla nacionalidad de un hombre es el รบnico medio por la cual una persona o un pueblo, pueden ser creadoresโ โฆ
–Cuando la confusiรณn y la locura forman parte de lo cotidianeidad; cuando las pasiones, los intereses propios, se convierten en los รบnicos argumentos verdaderos; cuando se opta por ignorar la previsible y por desparramar culpas a diestra, siniestra, arriba y abajo, no sea cosa que alguna quede pegada y haya que responder para ella; cuando un complicado arte del esquive lleva a hacerle verรณnicas cualquier responsabilidad para cederle el paso a toda clase de teorรญas mefistofรฉlicas; cuando se prejuzga por deporte y se habla por hablar; cuando se inflan virtudes hasta el lรญmite mรกximo de su potencia, sรณlo para esconder defectos; cuando blanco significa negro y negro quiere decir colorado y nos perdemos en medio de un cromatismo patรฉtico que nos aleja millones de aรฑos luz de la armonรญa del arco irisโฆ
–Cuando el dolor y la impotencia se agitan desde los noticieros, pero se quedan a vivir en la casa de los deudos; cuando se pierde el rumbo que nunca logramos conseguir y andamos por la vida guiados por una brรบjula del sur; cuando el envenenamiento cotidiano del espanto; la injusticia y la contaminaciรณn se aceptan como costumbre; cuando el determinismo se vende en el almacรฉn de cada barrio y resulta difรญcil hasta lo quimรฉrico defender el derecho a soรฑar porque la realidad impertinente rompe las ilusiones a hachazos: cuando en este primer mundoโmรกs primitivo que รณptimo–, en pleno auge de la libertad del mercado, y de elecciรณn, no se puede elegir el puesto al que comprarle la luz, no al feriante que venda mรกs frescas los telรฉfonos; cuando me resisto a tirar mis horas y mi vida en el agujero de las colas
–Cuando la prepotencia y la soberbia reemplazan a la sencilla y humilde lรณgica; cuando lo grave no son los hechos, sino su difusiรณn; cuando se alienta la impunidad con tolerancias injustificadas;
Cuando la muerte convierte en dioses a la gente, y una pรกtina de olvido transforma los errores en aciertos y los delitos en รฉxitos; cuando la vida deja para mรกs tarde los reconocimientos merecidos;
cuando aparecen ilusiones auditivas, ยฟserรก la realidad que grita y nadie escucha?
cuando se pretende que el opositor signifique enemigo;
cuando la historia se cuenta con mentiras; cuando las reglas estรกn para โlos tontosโ porque los vivosโ las usan para jugar al rango; cuando la gloria de ciertos eventos se confunde con la vanidad de quienes participan en ellos; cuando las antinomias crecen al ritmo acompasado de la estupidez; cuando la opiniรณn vive devaluada y la desmesura de lo apetitos personales priva a todos de opiniones diferentes; cuando el sofismo se convierte en un estilo de vida, y los eufemismos en idioma; cuando se habla de โlas รบltimas consecuenciasโ como de un epรญtome perentorio, y no es mรกs que un artilugio indigno para dilaciones que conocen los abismos infinitos del olvidoโฆ
–Cuando se hace un culto de la hipocresรญa, del fanatismo y de la intolerancia, y parece que todo estรก perdonado, por lo que se infiere que todo estรก permitido; cuando la รบnica rutina que supimos conseguir es la de perjudicar al prรณximo, por que el mejor รฉxito es el fracaso de los demรกs; cuando la ignorancia se pavonea insolente, las respuestas importan mรกs que las preguntas, y el olvido se impone a la memoria; cuando se dice que todos somos culpables, perdiendo de vista que las generalizaciones disuelve la individualidad, y ya nadie es responsable de nadaโฆ
–Cuando la vida es una caminata nocturna en un desierto sin estrellas, entonces duele, duele, duele, hasta la desesperaciรณn ser argentino.
La multitud vibraba. El organizador lo abrazรณ efusivamente. Los altoparlantes repetรญan: โGraciasโ, โGraciasโ, Graciasโ.
Entre saludos y palmadas, David vio los ojos llorosos de Marta. Entonces no supo que por รบltima vez. En mucho tiempo. Mucho. Demasiado. La gente empezรณ a gritar, desde un escenario un grupo de docentes pudo ver claramente un remolino de personas que venรญa girando desde la calle Riobamba. La garรบa suave que acompaรฑรณ el discurso se hizo lluvia intensa. Por detrรกs del torbellinoโcada vez mรกs rรกpido, mรกs grueso, mรกs voraz–, que se acercaba hacia el escenario desde Congreso estallaron reflejos de una luz amarilla. Ruido intenso, lacerante, polvo, vidrios rotos y gritos. Una bomba.
La gente corriรณ hacia todos lados, sin direcciรณn, sin orden, como pudo. A lo lejos comenzรณ a sonar el ulular de las sirenas, los movileros corrรญan detrรกs de la gente. Todo fue humo y confusiรณn. En la corrida, se faltรณ quien aprovechara para apoderarse de alguna carrera. David quedรณ paralizado, de pie en medio del escenario. Pensรณ en Walter, en Marta, en Clara y El abuelo mirando todo por televisiรณn. Los docentes lo tomaron de los hombros y lo empujaron para bajar del escenario. No se moviรณ. Todos se fueron. David quedรณ solo sobre esa tarima dispuesta para el acto, dos palomas volaron cerca de รฉl. Buscรณ a Marta con la mirada. No la encontrรณ. En pocos minutos la plaza habรญa quedado desierta. Solo palomas volando de un lado al otro, espantadasโฆ
___________________________________
___________________________________
โThe Speechโ
The crowdโIn spite of everything: Good Day. Today is the first anniversary of this Tent, and it is a month since the death of Walter Villegas, for someโand I am one of themโdoubtfully accidental. The Kaddish, that we Jews pray for the dead, is a prayer for the living, a plea for peace. For that reason, I am here today, before you, I want to express my secular prayer for life in peace, for a better situation for all of us, the teachers, in the memory of Walter Villegas, a man that always wished for it.
The crowd applauded him strongly, Cornet blasts and a big drum were heard. David muttered โand perhaps he got tired, Or not.โ He raised his hand, asking for silence, and he continued:
โI am the son of the public schools as were my parents. And my grandfather. A public school was an example and a cause for pride, example of excellence and of integration, because, except for very brief periods, in the public school get along together the Soifers, the Villegas, the Urdinarrains, the Fernรกndezes with the Rigolli. Today the situation is very different. The school has been marginalized. Today, we are at the margin, asking for education. Today we live at the margin, holding onto the lines so we donโt fall.
There was applause, a shout of โbravoโ and a long cornet blast. With gestures, David insisted on asking for silence. A new round of feedback from the microphone shook the stones. After that, he said:
โA democracy is great and succulent when, beyond exercising its strengths, also pays attention of the conflicts that generate its development. When you donโt worry so much about arriving, but rather pay more attention to going. A society goes on becoming more democratic to the extent that each one of its membersโfrom the first to the last, until it includes the entire country–. It takes responsibility for civic actions without delegating that function, If the society feigns its reality instead of taking it on, the culture of concealment the truth is transformed into allusion. And the allusion always shas a disfiguring meaning, it denaturalizes the magnitude of the conflict. Of that, the Argentines know too much.โ
The people broke into applause. Raindrops began to fall. David continued:
โWe are a people condemned to creativity. But if we reduce the budget for this alternative to the invention of excuses and of lies, our capacity for growth, for development, for expansion, will be another line in the long list of dreams suffocated by a pillow, before going to bed. Martรญn Buber, Maestro, one of the great thinkers of our time, philosopher always worried about the human condition, believed that nationality cannot be an end in itself. In the first years of a turbulent century, Buber said, โa manโs nationality is the only medium through which a person or a people, can be creatorsโโฆโ
โWhen confusion and madness form part of everyday life, when passions, personal interests, are converted into the only true arguments, when the choice is to ignore the foreseeable and spread guilt to the right, left, up, down, so that nothing is stuck in place and has to be responded to; when a complicated art of the dodge becomes spinning veronicas, whatever responsibility to let by all sorts of diabolic theories, when one makes prejudgment into a sport and speaks just to speak; when virtues are inflated to the maximum of their possibility, only to hide defects, when whit means black and black means red and we lose ourselves in the middle of that pathetic mixture of colors that the takes us away from millions of years of light of the harmony of the rainbowโฆ
โWhen the pain and impotence is agitated by the news, but they stay living in their relativeโs house; when the direction is lost and we never can get it and we go through life guided by a compass of the south; when the daily poisoning of shock; the injustice and contamination are accepted by custom, when the determinism is sold in the warehouse of every neighborhood and it is difficult even chimerical to defend the right to dream because the impertinent reality breaks up illusions with hatchet blows; when in this first world–more primitive than optimal–, at the full height of the freedom of the market, and of choice, you canโt chose the job with which to buy light/electricity, not the fair-seller who sells telephones on the cheap, when I resist throwing away my hours and my life in the hole of the waiting linesโฆ
โWhen a cult is made of hypocrisy, fanaticism and intolerance, and it seems like everything is pardoned, from which you infer that everything is permitted, when the only routine that we learned is the prejudice of toward the neighbor, that for which the greatest success is the failure of the others; when ignorance parades around insolently, the answers, the answers are more important than the solutions, and forgetting imposes on memory; when itโs said that we are all guilty, losing sight of the fact that generalizations dissolve individuality, an so nobody is responsible for anythingโฆ.
โWhen life is a nighttime walk in a desert without stars, then it hurts, it hurts, it hurts, until desperation to be Argentinean.โ
The crown vibrated. The organizer hugged him effusively. The loudspeakers repeated: โThank you,โ โThank you,โ โThank you.โ Among the cheers and applause, David say Martaโs crying eyes. Then he didnโt know that it was for the last time. In a great deal of time. Much time. Too much. The people began to shout, from a stage a group of teachers could clearly see the swirl of people turning toward Riobamba Street. The soft mist that accompanied the speech became a heavy downpour. Beyond the whirlwindโcontinually more rapid, more wide, more voracious–, that approached the stage from Congreso, exploded reflections of a yellow light. Intense noise, cutting, dull, broken windows and shouts. A bomb.
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย People ran everywhere, without direction, as they could. In the distance began to sound the wailing of sirens, reporters ran after the crowd. It was all smoke and confusion. In the running. There was no one who could take over any rush. David remained paralyzed, standing in the middle of the stage. He thought about Walter, Marta, Clara, and the grandfather watching on television. The teachers took him by his shoulders, and they pushed him to come down from the stage. He didnโt move. Everyone left. David stood alone on that platform set up for the event. Two doves flew near him. He looked for Marta with his gaze. He didnโt find her. In a few minutes the plaza had become deserted. Only doves flying one next to the other, stunned.
Translated by Stephen A. Sadow
From; Paula Margoles, Brรบjula al Sur. Buenos Aires; Emecรฉ, 2007.
El 18 de julio de 1994, 85 personas murieron y cientos mรกs resultaron heridas en un atentado con bomba perpetrado por Hezbolรก contra el edificio de la Asociaciรณn Mutual Israelita Argentina (AMIA). Este fue el ataque terrorista mรกs mortรญfero en la historia de Amรฉrica Latina, asรญ como contra cualquier objetivo judรญo fuera de Israel. Veintiocho aรฑos despuรฉs del terrible atentado con bomba, ninguno de los perpetradores ha sido llevado a juicio aรบn, a pesar de las รณrdenes de arresto emitidas y los constantes llamados a la justicia.
______________________________________________
The Attack on the AMIA
On 18 July 1994, 85 people were killed and hundreds more wounded in a Hezbollah-perpetrated bombing attack of the Argentine Israelite Mutual Association (AMIA) building. This was the deadliest terrorist attack in Latin American history as well as against any Jewish target outside of Israel. Twenty-eight years after the horrific bombing, none of the perpetrators has yet been brought to trial, despite arrest warrants issued and constant calls for justice.
_____________________________________________
La poesรญa de la AMIA/The Poetry of the AMIA
Manuela Fingueret (1945-2013) Argentina
Pasteur Esquina 86
Un estallado nombra
el instante
de la danza macabre
Temblor
dicen los que oyeron
caminar
la columna de huesos
acompaรฑando
la agonรญa
Lamentos de un coro
apunto de estallar
el รบnico grito
que no cesa
aquรญ estamos!
fulgor dicen los que vieron
arrojar el humo salvaje
mirando las piedras desnudas
horror dicen los que dieron
partรญculas
que cubren de polvo
agonizando cenizas
Hay una morada
en esa esquina
de polvo, huesos y piedras
con ochenta y seis gritos
repitiendo aquรญ estamos!
Y nada podrรกn erigir allรญ
que reemplace
el nombre
de cada nombre
que los nombra
_______________________
86 Pasteur Corner
An explosion names
the instant
of the dance of death
Earthquake
say those who heard
walking
the column
of bones
accompanying t
the agony
Laments from a chorus
about to explode
the only cry t
hat does not cease
Here we are!
Fire say those who say
burst forth
the savage smoke
watching
the naked rocks
Horror say those who smelled
particles that
that cover with dust
agonizing ashes
There is a dwelling
on that corner
of dust, bones and rocks
with eighty-six cries
repeating
Here we are!
And they will never be able to build anything there
that will replace
the name
of each name
that names them
Translated from the Spanish by Celeste Kostopulos-Cooperman
Protesta aรฑos despuรฉs/Protest years after the bombin
_______________________________________
Daniel Chirom (1955-2008) Argentina
18 de julio (*)
ยฟQuรฉ sucede esta noche entre todas las noches?
Todas las noches comemos en forma abundante
y cantamos y reรญmos con el vino
pero esta noche sรณlo hay pan รกzimo y vinagre
pues estamos tristes pensando en el destierro.
ยฟQuรฉ sucede esta noche que no entonamos cรกnticos?
Todas las noches alabamos a Dios
con nuestros mejores acentos
pero esta noche el silencio reina
porque nuestra hambre es dรฉbil
y extenso el desierto.
ยฟQuรฉ sucede esta noche que las sombras ganan
nuestras casas?
Todas las noches las luces brillan para iluminar la mesa
pero esta noche sรณlo hay un candelabro
para que recordemos la oscuridad.
ยฟQuรฉ sucede esta noche que nuestras manos
y lenguas tiemblan?
Todas las noches rezamos por el dรญa que vendrรก
y bailamos al pie de nuestros lechos
porque la sangre inocente no deja huellas
pero esta noche permanecemos quietos
mientras las aguas se desbocan
y las oraciones son para los muertos
que aรบn nos acompaรฑan.
ยฟQuรฉ sucede esta noche que apretamos los labios
y cerramos los ojos?
Todas las noches las palabras
nos protegen de la piedra
pero esta noche las voces estรกn mudas
y reรญmos en trรกgico gozo
pues un solitario muro delata nuestra intemperie.
ยฟQuรฉ sucede esta noche que todos ocultan su mirada?
Todas las noches distinguimos camaradas
y detenemos con la elocuencia
la caรญda de los cuerpos
pero esta noche la ausencia
hiere nuestras carnes viejas
y la soledad del nombre
hace que escuchemos lo que antes veรญamos.
ยฟQuรฉ sucede esta noche que la alegrรญa plegรณ sus alas
y el silencio distrae nuestros pensamientos?
Todas las noches,
aunque la muerte nos pise los talones,
anunciamos a la luna y adoramos al leรณn
pero esta noche nadie llamรณ a nuestra puerta
y ya es demasiado tarde para que alguien venga
y nos guรญe a travรฉs de las estrellas.
ยฟQuรฉ sucede esta noche entre todas las noches?
Todas las noches un espรญritu recorre
el dรญa de nuestras bodas, imagina el primer beso,
el sรบbito esplendor, la loca belleza
pero esta noche un viento helado taรฑe los rostros
y el alma es polvo y cieno bajo las garras de la memoria perdida.
Esta noche somos perros que han extraviado a su amo.
En esta noche no hay nadie en el sepulcro.
* En esta fecha se produjo el brutal atentado a la A.M.I.A. (Asociaciรณn
Mutual Israelita Argentina) que segรณ la vida de 86
Ariel Dorfman (1942- ) es un autor chileno-estadounidense, nacido en Argentina. Desde que escribiรณ How to Read Donald Duck, ha acumulado un impresionante cuerpo de ficciรณn, poesรญa, memorias y no ficciรณn, traducido a mรกs de cincuenta idiomas. Sus obras, incluidas La muerte y la doncella (convertida en una pelรญcula de Roman Polanski) y Purgatorio, se han representado en mรกs de cien paรญses. Activista de derechos humanos, colabora regularmente en publicaciones como el New York Times, The New York Review of Books y The Guardian, junto con muchos otros periรณdicos de todo el mundo. Entre sus libros mรกs recientes se encuentran las novelas Los fantasmas de Darwin, Cautivos y La oficina de compensaciรณn, el cuento infantil La rebeliรณn de los conejos y Voces del otro lado de la muerte, una colecciรณn de poemas. รl y su esposa Angรฉlica dividen su tiempo entre Chile y Durham, Carolina del Norte, donde es Profesor Emรฉrito Distinguido de Literatura en la Universidad de Duke.
_______________________________________________
Ariel Dorfman (1942- ) is a Chilean-American author, born in Argentina. Since writing How to Read Donald Duck, he has built up an impressive body of fiction, poetry, memoirs and non-fiction, translated into more than fifty languages. His plays, including Death and the Maiden (made into a film by Roman Polanski) and Purgatorio, have been staged in over one hundred countries. A human rights activist, he contributes regularly to publications such as the New York Times, The New York Review of Books and the Guardian, along with many other papers around the world. Among his most recent books are the novels Darwinโs Ghosts, Cautivos and The Compensation Bureau, the childrenโs story, The Rabbitsโ Rebellion, and Voices from the Other Side of Death, a collection of poems. He and his wife Angรฉlica divide their time between Chile and Durham, North Carolina, where he is a Distinguished Emeritus Professor of Literature at Duke University.
Andrรฉs Waissman nace e Buenos Aires en 1955 de padres judรญos. Comenzรณ a exponer muy tempranamente a mediados de los 70. En 1974, trabajรณ con Augusto Torres en Barcelona y en 1978 y con Antonio Seguรญ en Parรญs. En 1984, se radica en San Francisco, donde trabajรณ en el Consulado Argentino, organizando eventos culturales en representaciรณn de Argentina y desde donde desarrolla una carrera internacional exponiendo en diferentes galerรญas y museos de Los รngeles, San Francisco, Nueva York. Regresรณ a Buenos Aires y dirigรญa el programa de TV Styles, dedicado a rescatar los valores culturales. En 2005 se publicรณ el libro WAISSMAN. En 2010, se presenta en MALBA, el documental Waissman, PBS de EEUU. Desde 2012, participa e integra el equipo docente en un Programa Anual de Encuentros de Anรกlisis, Crรญtica y Producciรณn de Arte. Su arte muestra indirectamente la temรกtica judรญa.
__________________________________________
Andrรฉs Waissman was born in Buenos Aires in 1955 of Jewish parents. He began to exhibit very early in the mid-1970s. In 1974, he worked with Augusto Torres in Barcelona and in 1978 and with Antonio Seguรญ in Paris. In 1984, he settled in San Francisco, where he worked at the Argentine Consulate, organizing cultural events on behalf of Argentina and from where he developed an international career exhibiting in different galleries and museums in Los Angeles, San Francisco, New York. He returned to Buenos Aires and directed the TV program Styles, dedicated to rescuing cultural values. In 2005 the book WAISSMAN was published. In 2010, it is presented in MALBA, the documentary Waissman, PBS of the USA. Since 2012, he participates and integrates the teaching team in an Annual Program of Art Analysis, Criticism and Production Encounters. His work often hints at Jewish themes.
_______________________________________________
“Andrรฉs Waissman es un artista que conoce tambiรฉn de geologรญa; de la mutaciรณn de las capas sucesivas de memoria en arte รฉtico. Sabe que sรณlo puede haber sociedad si las llagas de la historia esculpen la retina y se dejan pintar, asรญ: simples, potentes y bellรญsimas, como pliegues de porvenir, explosiones iniciales, movimiento, oleaje, estremecimiento, Big Bang. Terrible e irresistible vicio el de Andrรฉs Waissman, de situar en la pequeรฑa puerta de lo instantรกneo esos no-lugares en los que, justamente, hacer pensable el advenir y la apertura de “otros mundos posibles”.
Espronceda Centro de Arte — Barcelona
_____________________________________________
“Andrรฉs Waissman is an artist who also knows geology; of the mutation of the successive layers of memory in ethical art. He knows that there can only be society if the wounds of history sculpt the retina and allow themselves to be painted, like this: simple, powerful and beautiful, like folds of the future, initial explosions, movement, waves, shudder, Big Bang. Terrible and irresistible vice that of Andrรฉs Waissman, of placing in the small door of the instantaneous those non-places in which, precisely, to make the future thinkable and the opening of “other possible worlds”.
Nacรญ en la ciudad de Bahรญa Blanca en el aรฑo 1957
Estudios cursados de Matemรกtica en la Universidad de Buenos Aires
Escribรญ mรกs que nada poesรญa desde muy joven, a menudo con desesperaciรณn. Expresar en palabras el dolor resultรณ una forma sutil de autosanacion. Varios de esos poemas se plasmaron en los cinco libros que menciono mรกs abajo. Desde hace un tiempo incursionรณ en el relato. Diario de un cuรฉntenik se basa tanto en personas que conocรญ trabajando como en mi imaginaciรณn. Muchos otros relatos, sobre temas variados, aรบn permanecen inรฉditos. Estรกn esperando, pacientemente, la forma adecuada de salir a la luz.
Es del comercio de lo que vivรญ toda mi vida, debo decir que con suerte diversa. Actualmente me siento cรณmodo dedicรกndome al tratamiento de rezagos electrรณnicos y a la venta por internet. Me gusta pensar que soy un cuentenik tecnolรณgico, pero un orgulloso cuentenik al fin.
Presidente durante 8 aรฑos de la Asociaciรณn Argentina del juego de go.
_________________________________________
Jorge Santkovsky:
I was born in Bahรญa Blanca in 1957 and moved to Buenos Aires in 1976.
I took courses in mathematics at the University of Buenos Aires.
I wrote more poetry than anything else, often out of desperation. To express pain in words resulted in a subtle form of self-cleaning. A number of those poems were embodied in the five books of poetry that I mention below. A while ago, I made an incursion into the short-story, Diario de un cuรฉntenik is based as much on people I met while working as in my imagination. Many other stories, on varied themes, still remain unpublished. They are waiting, patiently, to see the light.
It is from commerce that I have lived my entire life, with varied luck, I should say. Right now, Iโm comfortable dedicating myself to the handling of remaindered electronic devices and to internet sales. I like to think that I am a technological cuentenik, but a proud cuentenik in the end.
These days I find myself writing about the magic of visible and invisible beings that inhabit the neighborhood of San Telmo, old neighborhood where I live in Buenos Aires.
For eight years, I was president of the Argentine Association for the Game of Go.
Libros de Jorge Santkovsky/Books by Jorge Santkovsky
โRevelaciones โpor la Editorial Huesos de Jibia 2010- Ciudad de Buenos Aires
โRevelaciones acerca de otras criaturasโ por la Editorial Huesos de Jibia 2011
โBreves โpor la editorial Colectivo Semilla 2013 de la ciudad de Bahรญa Blanca
โEl sonido de la atenciรณnโ Editorial Huesos de Jibia 2014 Ciudad de Buenos Aires
โLa incomodidadโ Editorial Huesos de Jibia 2015 Ciudad de Buenos Aires
“El despuรฉs es ahora”. A :Capela Ediciones 2022 Ciudad de Buenos Aires
Narrative: โDiario de un cuentenikโ de la editorial Leviatรกn 2020
Es cierto que hay muchos poemas, no es necesario leerlos en el orden establecido. Propongo una lectura aleatoria, sobrevolando los versos. Varios de ellos vivieron en libros anteriores. Vuelven modificados por el tiempo y la relectura. Las mismas obsesiones con la esperanza de que alguien las escuche. Jorge Santkovsky
“It is true that there are many poems, it is not necessary to read them in the established order. I propose a random reading, flying over the verses. Several of them lived in previous books. They return modified by time and rereading. The same obsessions in the hope that someone will listen to them.” Jorge Santkovsky
Carlos Moisรฉs Grรผnberg fue uno de los autores judรญos mรกs importantes e influyentes de su generaciรณn en Argentina. Naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1903 y falleciรณ en 1968. Recibiรณ su educaciรณn formal de la Universidad de Buenos Aires, obteniendo tรญtulos avanzados en filosofรญa y derecho. En sus primeros volรบmenes de poesรญa โLas cรกmaras del rey (1922) y El libro del tiempo (1924)- Grรผnberg mostrรณ una estrecha filiaciรณn con el grupo de escritores de vanguardia de la dรฉcada de 1920 conocidos como los martรญnfierristas, por su vinculaciรณn con la revista literaria Martรญn Fierro. Tambiรฉn fue conocido por sus traducciones de Heinrich Heine y H.N. Bialik al espaรฑol. Participรณ activamente en el movimiento sionista y fue nombrado enlace entre el Estado de Israel y Argentina en 1948. Carlos Grรผnberg no se disculpรณ en su expresiรณn poรฉtica de la identidad judรญa, que buscรณ especialmente incorporar en sus รบltimas obras. Al igual que su contemporรกneo Cรฉsar Tiempo (Israel Zeitlin), Grรผnberg se esforzรณ por definir la identidad argentino-judรญa en su poesรญa, un proyecto a veces doloroso pero siempre sincero. Su Mester de juderรญa (1940) llevรณ un prefacio laudatorio de Jorge Luis Borges que lo consagrรณ como poeta. Si bien muchos de los poemas hablan directamente de la situaciรณn precaria y, a menudo, peligrosa de los judรญos en Argentina, Grรผnberg plantea claramente su fe en el paรญs como una nueva patria llena de esperanza. Dado que su perspectiva como judรญo era secular, en este libro denuncia la religiosidad y declara su ateรญsmo con bastante fuerza y โโcoherencia. Junto a Un rรญo de Babel (1965), el siguiente volumen de poesรญa de Grรผnberg, estรก marcado por los importantes acontecimientos histรณricos desde la publicaciรณn de Mester. Su trabajo ha tenido un impacto duradero en las generaciones posteriores y permanece como un testimonio de la imaginaciรณn poรฉtica como una fundiciรณn de identidad cultural.
Carlos Moisรฉs Grรผnberg was one of the most important and influential Jewish authors of his generation in Argentina. He was born in Buenos Aires in 1903 and died in 1968. He received his formal education from the University of Buenos Aires, earning advanced degrees in philosophy and law. In his first volumes of poetry –The King’s Chambers (1922) and The Book of Time (1924)- Grรผnberg showed a close affiliation with the group of avant-garde writers of the 1920s known as the martรญnfierristas, due to their links with the literary magazine Martin Fierro. He was also known for his translations of Heinrich Heine and H.N. Bialik to Spanish. He was active in the Zionist movement and was appointed liaison between the State of Israel and Argentina in 1948. Carlos Grรผnberg was unapologetic in his poetic expression of Jewish identity, which he especially sought to incorporate in his later works. Like his contemporary Cรฉsar Tiempo (Israel Zeitlin), Grรผnberg strove to define Argentine-Jewish identity in his poetry, a sometimes painful but always sincere project. His Mester de Juderรญa (1940) carried a laudatory preface by Jorge Luis Borges that consecrated him as a poet. While many of the poems speak directly to the precarious and often dangerous situation of the Jews in Argentina, Grรผnberg makes clear his faith in the country as a new homeland full of hope. Since his perspective as a Jew was secular, in this book he denounces religiosity and declares his atheism quite strongly and consistently. Together with A River of Babel (1965), Grรผnberg’s next volume of poetry, it is marked by the important historical events since Mester’s publication. His work has had a lasting impact on subsequent generations and remains a testament to the poetic imagination as a foundry of cultural identity.
Luisa Futoransky naciรณ en Buenos Aires. En 1967 se recibe de abogada en la misma Universidad. Obtiene una beca de laย Universidad de Iowaย mediante la que realiza la residencia delย Programa Internacional de Escritura,ย EE. UU.En Roma, Italia, estudia poesรญa contemporรกnea en la Universidad de Roma y en la Academia Chighiana, Siena. Tras residir en China, donde trabaja para Radio Pekรญn, y Japรณn, donde es periodista del servicio en espaรฑol de la NHK y profesora de mรบsica en la Universidad de mรบsica de Mushasino (Tokio), en 1981 se radicรณ en Francia, trabajando en elย Centro Georges Pompidou,ย y como redactora de la agencia de noticias France Presse.Ha colaborado en diversos medios literarios periodรญsticos:ย Ars,ย L’Ane,ย Pรกgina/30,ย Pรกgina/12,ย Clarรญn,ย El Correo de la Unesco,ย World Fiction,ย Hispamรฉrica,ย Basel Zeitung. Asimismo, ha hecho trabajos para Radio France, el Ministerio de Cultura Francรฉs y Radio Euskadi de Espaรฑa.Futoransky, que habla espaรฑol, francรฉs, inglรฉs, hebreo e italiano, reรบne en su obra un conjunto increรญblemente rico de referencias culturales inspiradas en sus experiencias de vida en Amรฉrica Latina, Europa y el Lejano Oriente, que mezcla con imรกgenes distintivas de su hogar (Argentina). En 1971 fue miembro del International Writing Program de la Universidad de Iowa. Es invitada regularmente a dar conferencias en prestigiosas universidades de Francia, Espaรฑa, Argentina y Estados Unidos. Asimismo, con regularidad es autora invitada a festivales literarios internacionales. La poesรญa y las novelas de Futoransky se citan a menudo en los estudios sobre la escritura femenina contemporรกnea, asรญ como en los que tratan temas como el exilio, la identidad transnacional, la lengua, la poesรญa latinoamericana contemporรกnea o los escritores argentinos en Parรญs.
Luisa Futoransky was born in Buenos Aires. In 1967 she received her law degree from the same University. He obtains a scholarship from the University of Iowa through which he does the International Writing Program residency, USA in Rome, Italy, studies contemporary poetry at the University of Rome and at the Chighiana Academy, Siena. After residing in China, where she works for Radio Peking, and Japan, where she is a journalist for the NHK Spanish service and a music professor at the Mushasino University of Music (Tokyo), in 1981 she settled in France, working at the Center Georges Pompidou, and as editor of the France Presse news agency, has collaborated in various literary and journalistic media: Ars, L’Ane, Pรกgina / 30, Pรกgina / 12, Clarรญn, El Correo de la Unesco, World Fiction, Hispamรฉrica, Basel Zeitung. She has also done work for Radio France, the French Ministry of Culture and Radio Euskadi de Espaรฑa.Futoransky, who speaks Spanish, French, English, Hebrew and Italian, brings together in her poetry and novels an incredibly rich set of cultural references inspired by her experiences of life in Latin America, Europe and the Far East, which he mixes with distinctive images of his home (Argentina). In 1997 she was a member of the International Writing Program of Iowa City, Iowa. She is regularly invited to give lectures at prestigious universities in France, Spain, Argentina and the United States. She is also a regular guest author at international literary festivals. Futoransky’s work is often cited in studies of contemporary female writing, as well as in those dealing with topics such as exile, transnational identity, language, contemporary Latin American poetry, or Argentine writers in Paris.
en Jerusa los dรญas son largos y desde que amanece la gente, como
sea
quiere mereceโy lo consigueโdentro de la pelรญcula de acciรณn
los cowboys en el medio oriente escupen semillitas de girasol, a cual
mรกs lejos
en el jardรญn uno puede toparse con erizos o puercoespines
y en la propia cama con escorpiones, asรญ en la tierraโฆ
para mรกs intri, allen se le ocurriรณ esfumarse en primavera, durante
una tarde
jeruso limit ana, allen que se fue de aquรญ sin convencerse ni convencernos
de que su madre lo quiere, Naomi,
haya sido cierto
mientras
todos gritan
cuando no aรบllan, incluidas en sitial privilegiado, las piedras
las cigรผeรฑas apuran para irse y confunden los envรญos,
vรญrgenes cรฉlibes, anacoretas y guardianes de los templos
pagan el pato; se descuenta que nos, el resto, tambiรฉn,
nos, los pagadores de diezmos, platos rotos, los donantes de sangre,
huesos y sesos.
Entre bocinas, alarmas verdaderas y no tanto, timbrazos imperativos e telรฉfonos vacรญos
prosperan flores silvestres y me debato, a capa y espada, a golpes
feroces
de rascar mi sarna a lo marat, entre las/los charlotte cordray, zelotes,
esenios, alambrados,
todos armados, menos de paciencia
cuรกnto ayes!, Jerusa de me amor
hoy hacia la madrugada vi llover de prisa unas gotas avergonzadas
que escamotean amapolas brillantes al desierto entre los pendientes
de la cola sedienta,
lechosa, del cometa halle-bopp
que pregona, empecinado
tonterรญas milenarias.
Al anochecer se apersona en el hotel entre espigas descosidas de cenas y
brindis literarios, un seรฑor de aspecto saludable y optimista que dice que
debo reconocerlo como uno de mi familia y me cuenta para que lo incluya, a
su pedido, en mi prรณxima novela que uno de mis primos corre desnudo
por las calles de rehovot y cuando lo encuentran, dice: — vamos a lo de
mamรก โ y le repiten que mamรก muriรณ hace mucho pero mucho tiempo
como dรฉcadas en remota buenos aires y รฉl se pone a
sollozar โno me digas, no me digas โ y se deja conducir, dulce,
caninamente a casa y maรฑana recomienza a nuevo a querer visitar a
papรก, y se quedรณ de modo irreversible den algรบn barrio, desvestido,
inmune a los vientos levantinos, jugando a las visitas con los de la
neblina
el seรฑor se llama meir e insiste a relatarme sagas de entrecasas y de
todos los dรญas; la retorna de mi prima, la que llamaban reina esther por
bella y caprichosa comprรณ una pizzerรญa con el que era su marido
y en vรญsperas de la boda lo dejรณ plantado pro se quedรณ con el negocio y
nosotros pagando todavรญa la hipoteca: como visitadora social a estercita
lo tocaron las prisiones y terminรณ enamorรกndose d eso preso favorito, un
muchacho que andaba de reincidente por el mundo de las drogas, pero
muy bien mozo, no hay quien lo niegue y, cuando saliรณ condicional, una
tarde ciertos tipos lo vinieron a buscar y nunca se supo, y se la vio
a la reinita ester con foto a dos columnas en los diarios del paรญs,
luchando para que los del rabinato le declaren viuda porque el cuerpo
del buenorro nunca apareciรณ y querรญa casarse embarazada de ocho
meses con un contable para sentar cabeza hasta que los rabinos dijeron
de acuerdo para que no vuela a las andadas y es viuda legal y saliรณ,
dice meir, para arriba
en los manuscritos del mar muerto combaten entre sรญ los hijos de la luz
con los de las sombras
para renovado asombro de los estudiosos y el resto del paรญs de a pie,
nadie tiene nombre, nadie sabe ni puede diferenciar unos de otros
pareciera que ganaron por un pelo los de la luz,
para convertirse, y se sabe, en la sombra de lo que fuimos, somos y
serรกs
camino con mi amigo, el poeta rami, mascullando doscientos gramos de
etrov abrillantados, desgranamos cierta saludable maledicencia sobre
colegas ausentes, intercambiamos avatares de amantes y cada tanto, por
rรกfagas, nos embriaga el secreto de los escribas de quimit y qumram,
cuyas palabras pueden ser leรญdas por niรฑos de primaria de hoy pero
la realidad, la respiraciรณn, el revรฉs y el derecho, el arriba y el abajo, no
ay! jerusa de mi corazรณn, la de jesรบs y de jesusa. La de anรฉmonas
violentas y viejos que divagan doloridos de in coherencia en el asilo tan
soleado
mi fascinaciรณn reciente, una poeta con nombre de dalia pรบrpura y
oscura, que pierde por vaharadas la razรณn, pero encuentra sus gafas de
sol Cartier que le gustan tanto dice que hay que revisar el gรฉnesis, estรก
segura que abraham nuestro patriarca querรญa mรกs a ismael que a isaac
por eso no lo sacrificรณ, de las mujeres, ni ella habla
salvo de su madre a quien reverencia como maestra legendaria porque
le enseรฑรณ que el pueblo judรญo por ser singular y especial tiene la
obligaciรณn, mayor, de ser compasivo
y yo contemplo con espanto los estragos que tanto รญdolo sangriento,
tantas espinas, tanta metralla, causan a la tierra, las plantas y la gente
y quรฉ decir de concepto de โelegidoโ
fuente donde abrevan las sin razones todas
las injusticias
los cuadrรญculados. Los pozos
los dameros envenenados, los duelos sin consuelo,
dalia te aparto, te compadezco suavemente
y agito mi paรฑuelo de me voy
para pertenecer a la secta detallada en los rollos
habรญa que tener nueve elementos exteriores evidentes
como ser pรกlido en tierra insolados, dedos largos, complexiรณn no
sanguรญnea
y mรกs, pero mucho mรกs
con seis cualidades se ponรญa al adepto a prueba por dos aรฑos, de ser
bien observado, pasaba a novicio, a servidor
de quiรฉn, de quiรฉnes,
ah! los avispados letrados de quimitโฆ
soberbias, magnรญficos, las plantas carnosas de aloe vera
podrรญan calmar las quemadoras de este zoo y restantes del sistema
solar
la savia de los que vendrรกn espera
un mรญnimo apenas de confianza
esto es, la sal, el salem, el cardamomo, el rosmarino, la pimienta
el sexo de la vida
acรก los aventureros vienen por marejadas que luego catalogamos,
sombrรญamente, por orden de alfabeto
quรฉ/cรณmo,/cuรกl
con sfueron, por ejemplo, los alfanjes, las cimitarras de saladino y suleimรกn,
los minaretes, armarรญas, las victorias que se pudren en derrotas,
un amasijo sintรฉtico, animista, y sincrรฉtico a ambos lados de la ruta principal
de herrumbres del 48, el 67, el dรญa del perdรณn
para plantar en el desierto hay que lavar sin cesar la tierra
porque el mar al alcance de la mano se llama muerto o se hace
para por tal,
que para el caso es lo mismo
en primaver la flor nacional es humilde y salvaje, es un rojo fulgurante
deja tras de sรญ reguero flamรญgero y breve que desquicia los puntos
cardinales
de la jerusalem celeste y salpica, chisporrotea desafuero en la
terrestre
en el juzgado de paz asisto, vaya reiteraciรณn obsesiva en el tรฉrmino
a una audiencia donde mi hermano defiende, de oficio, a un joven que
comparece
esposado de pies y manos ante el juez por haber
extorsionado con cuchillo en yugular ajena 100 shekels a un ciudadano
pรญo y religioso para proporcionarse su dosis que en hebreo es manรก:
como sabe que ochenta le alcanzan devuelve al individuo veinte, quien
mรกs tarde lo reconoce y denuncia,
me guardo para siempre en el bolsillo izquierdo del corazรณn su
andarvenir taimado y apaleado, su mano de preguntar nada y tambiรฉn
le digo adiรณs
adiรณs
me moran esto sedimentos de risotadas y matanzas
de taciturnidades ejemplares
me abro paso entre maullidos dรญscolos
geranios gigantes y retorcidos, impregno
me impregno de frituras รญntimas y callejeras
y mosaicos
y finjo que me voy
entonces recibo de viva voz, una esquela
indispensable, enmaraรฑada
que al cuello confeccionada
con perlas sombrรญas de antiguas lรกgrimas:
quiero que sepas que mamรก te quiere.
Sonia
Tivรณn, 14 de abril 1997 _____________________________________________________________________
An intense poem dedicated to Jerusalem:
โJerusa of My Loveโ
in jerusa the days are long and since dawn, the people, such as they
are,
want to meddleโand they do soโinside the action movie
the coyboys of the Middle East spit out sunflower seeds, to which
further away
in the garden, one can stumble upon hedgehogs and porcupines
and in your own bed, scorpions, so is the landโฆ
but on top of that, it occurred to allen to disappear during the Spring,
one afternoon
jeroso limit ana, allen who left to without convincing himself or
convincing us
of what his mother, who loves him, naomi,
had been certain
while
everyone shouts
when they donโt howl, included, in the privileged seating, the stones.
the storks hurry to leave and confuse the shipments,
virgins and celibate monks, anchorites and guardians of the temples
pay the piper; are discounted because of us, the rest, also,
us, they payers of tithes, broken plates, the givers of blood,
bones and brains
among car horns, real alarms and not so much, imperative door-ringing
and empty telephones
wild flowers prosper, and I struggle tooth and nail, with ferocious
blows
to scratch the scabies like Maratโs, among these/those charlotte cordray, zealots, essenes, illuminists,
all of them armed, except with patience
how many ays! jerusaa of my love
today toward early morning, I saw it rain quickly some embarrassed drops
that hide brilliant desert poppies among those depending
on the thirsty tail,
milky, of the Halle-Bopp comet
that preaches, stubborn
millennial nonsense.
at night fall in the hotel among disjointed thorns from suppers and
literary toasts, a health-looking and optimistic gentleman appears who says that I ought to recognize him as a member of my family and he tells me that I should include, on his request, in my next novel, that one of my cousins run naked through the streets of rehovot, and when they find him, he says: โletโs go to mamaโs,โ and they repeat to him that mama died long ago, like decades and more decades in remote buenos aires, and he began to sigh: โdonโt tell me, donโt tell me,โ and he let himself be lead, sweetly and wearily home and tomorrow he began again to want to visit papa, and he remained in an irreversible way in some neighborhood, undressed, immune to the levantine winds, playing visits with those of the mist
the gentleman is named meir and insists in relating to me sagas from home and of everyday life: that cousinโs litte girl, who hey called queen esther for being beautiful and capricious, bought a pizzeria with the one who was then her almost husband and just before the wedding she ditched him, but she kept the business and with us paying the mortgage; as an social worker the prisons were estercitaโs territory, and she ended up falling in love with her favorite prisoner, a boy who was a re-offender from the drug world, but very good looking, no reason to deny it and, when he was freed conditionally, one afternoon, some tough came to visit him, and nothing more was known of him., and ester was seen in two-column photos in the countryโs newspapers, fighting so that the rabbinate would declare her a widow because the body of the good-looking fellow never appeared and she wanted to marry pregnant for eight months with a bookkeeper and settle down until even the rabbis said that they agreed but that she not return to her wild ways and she is a legal widow and she left, meir said, on her way.
in the manuscripts of the dead sea the sons of light and the sons of darkness are in combat
to the renewed the amazement of the studious and the rest of living people, nobody has a name, nobody knows nor can differentiate one from the other
it seemed that by a hair those of the light won
to convert themselves, it’s well-known, from the shadow of what we were, are and you will be.
I walk with my friend, the poet rami, chewing two hundred grams of shiny etrogs, we thresh certain healthy slander about absent colleagues, we interchange avatars of lovers, and once in a while, in puffs, we get drunk over the secret of the scribes of quitmit and of qumram, whose words can be read by children in school today, but the reality, the breath, backwards and forwards, not above and below
ay! jerusa of my heart, that of jesus and of jesusa, that of violent anemones and old men who ramble pained by incoherence in the very sunny nursing home
my recent fascination, un poet with a name of purple and dark dahlias,
who loses, by puffs, her reason, who finds his Cartier sun glasses that likes so much to say, that itโs necessary to revise Genesis, she is sure that abraham our patriarch loved ismael more than isaac and for that reason didnโt sacrifice him, of the women, not even she, speaks,
except of her mother whom she reveres as a legendary teacher because
she taught her the that the Jewish people for being singular and special, has the obligation, the greatest, to be compassionate
and I contemplate with shock the havoc that so much bloody idol,
so many thorns, so much shrapnel causes the earth, the plants and the people
and what to say about the concept of โchosenโ
source which waters all the craziest ideas
the injustices, the rigidities
the squares, the wells
the poisoned checkerboards, the griefs without consolation,
Dahlia, I move away from you, I feel sorry for you, softly
and I shake my handkerchief in goodbye
to belong to the sect described in the rolls
it was necessary to have nine evident exterior characteristics
like being pallid in sunny lands, long fingers, a non-rosy complexion
and more, much more
with six qualities, the adept is tested for two years and, on being
well judged, he passes to novice, a servant
of whom, of whose.
ah! the cunning scholars of qitmit. . .
proud, magnanimous, the fleshy plants of aloe vera
could calm down the burns of this zoo and whatโs left of the solar
system
the energy of those who come hopes for
just a minimum of trust
this is, the salem, the cardamon, the rosemary, the pepper
the sex of life
here the adventurers come by heavy seas that later we catalog
somberly in alphabetical order
what/how/who
with s they were, for example, the cutlases, the simitars ofsaladin and suleiman,
the minarets, armories, the victories that rot into defeats
a synthetic hodgepodge, animist and syncretic at both sides of the principal route of
rusts of the 48, the 67, the day of fasting and pardon
to plant in the desert, it is necessary to wash the earth without ceasing
because the sea at armโs reach is called death or
makes it seem that way
so that the situation is the same
in Spring the national flower is humble and wild, of a brilliant red,
leaves behind a brief and blazing trickle that drives to despair the cardinal points
of heavenly Jerusalem and splashes, gives off sparks of outrage on the
terrestrial
I attend the court of peace, what an obsessive reiteration with the end
an audience where my brother defends, his trade, a young man who
appears
shackled by hands and feet before the judge of having
extorted with a knife at the otherโs jugular 100 shekels from a pious and religious citizen to provide himself a dose of what in Hebrew is called manna:
as he knew that 80 would be enough for him, he returned 20 to the individual who later recognized him and reported him.
I keep forever his in my left pocket near my heart his crafty and beaten knife, and I also say goodbye to him
goodbye
these sediments of guffaws and killings look at me
of exemplary taciturnity
I make my way thorough unruly meows
giant and twisted geraniums
I fill myself up with intimate and street fritters
Santiago Kovadloff naciรณ en Buenos Aires, 1942. Es ensayista, poeta, traductor de literatura de lengua portuguesa y autor de relatos para niรฑos. Se graduรณ en Filosofรญa en la Universidad de Buenos Aires. Es Doctor Honoris Causa por la Universidad de Ciencias Empresariales y Sociales (UCES), Profesor Honorario de la Universidad Autรณnoma de Madrid y miembro del Comitรฉ Acadรฉmico y Cientรญfico de la Universidad Ben-Gurion del Neguev, de Israel. Participรณ como profesor invitado en la Cรกtedra Latinoamericana โJulio Cortรกzarโ de la Ciudad de Guadalajara, Mรฉxico, en el aรฑo 2013.Es miembro de nรบmero de la Academia Argentina de Letras, miembro correspondiente de la Real Academia Espaรฑola y vicepresidente de la Academia Nacional de Ciencias Morales y Polรญticas. Desde el aรฑo 2016 preside el capรญtulo argentino del Club de Roma.Se desempeรฑa profesionalmente como profesor privado de Filosofรญa y conferencista. Es colaborador permanente del diario La Naciรณn de Buenos Aires.
Santiago Kovadloff es famoso por su habilidad de condensar pensamientos profundos en la forma de frases.
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Santiago Kovadloff was born in Buenos Aires in 1942. He is an essayist, poet, translator of Portuguese-language literature, and author of children’s stories. He graduated in Philosophy at the University of Buenos Aires. He is Doctor Honoris Causa from the University of Business and Social Sciences (UCES), Honorary Professor at the Autonomous University of Madrid and member of the Academic and Scientific Committee of the Ben-Gurion University of the Negev, Israel. He participated as a visiting professor in the “Julio Cortรกzar” Latin American Chair of the City of Guadalajara, Mexico, in 2013. He is a full member of the Argentine Academy of Letters, corresponding member of the Royal Spanish Academy and vice president of the National Academy of Arts. Moral and Political Sciences. Since 2016, he has chaired the Argentine chapter of the Club of Rome. He works professionally as a private professor of Philosophy and lecturer. He is a permanent collaborator of the newspaper La Naciรณn of Buenos Aires.
Santiago Kovadloff is famous for his ability to condense deep thoughts into a few words in the form of sayings.
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Frases sabias de Santiago Kovadloff/
Wise Statements by Santiago Kovadloff
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โPertenezco a un pueblo y a una cultura que no se ha resignado a darle la รบltimaal dolor y ha convertido sus pesares en materia de esperanza , El judรญo confรญa en una interpretaciรณn mรกs y cree que es posible volver a empezar. El holocaustono tuvo la รบltima palabraโ.
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“I belong to a people and a culture that has not resigned itself to give the last word pain and has converted its sufferings in material for hope. The Jew trusts in an another interpretation and believes it is possible to begin again. The Holocaust did not have the last word.”
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The vocation of a writer who is a philosopher consists in a summed retelling to contribute to the general insomnia. And if we agree with it, it seems to me the I’ve done something like that. I am helping that sleep does not abound Perhaps because I myself am an wakeful person and I can’t be otherwise.
Music tells us what we don’t know, if not what we can’t know it tells us
During hundreds of thousands of years, man fought to open a place in nature; for the first time in in history of our species, the situation is reversed and today in is indispensable to find him a place in nature in the world of man.
Silence can be, then, as much the greatest corollary of lucidity as the irremediable mist in which aptitude is diluted and at times the necessity of articulating an idea or an emotion with leaving behind the world of the predictable and the codifiable.
What you have inherited from your parents, acquire it by your own efforts to be worthy of it.
Death is not something that we will survive. Someone living and stops dying when he expires. To die requires that you were alive.
My home is this woman—– “My home is this woman who now lives by my side. Like her, with her, everything around her reposes. When she awakes, the things will too. The doors will open again, the water will run again, the steps will bring life to the old staircase, the light will fall again. I will return yo myself, the words, and her voice, like a halo, will surround my day.
“Hay duelo donde hay sufrimiento”.
“There is grief where there suffering.”
***
“La decadencia no es una vuelta al pasado, es una condena al presente”.
“Decadence is not a return to the past; it’s a damning of the present.”
***
“La vida cotidiana, en apariencia previsible desmedidamente familiar, es la que encierra la
posibilidad de los grandes descubrimientos que rompen con la costumbre”.
“Everyday life, apparently predictable, overly familiar, is that which has within it the possibility of the great discoveries that break with custom.”
***
” La polรญtica es un ejercicio moderado de la maldad, pero a la vez es imprescindible porque sin ella no hay organizaciรณn social”.
Politics is an exercise moderated by evil, but at the same time, it is absolutely necessary, because without it, the is no social organization.”
Roberto Burle Marx fue paisagista, arquiteto, desenhista, pintor, gravador, litรณgrafo, escultor,tapeceiro, ceramista, designer de jรณias, decorador. Durante a infรขncia vive no Rio de Janeiro. Vai com a famรญlia para a Alemanha, em 1928. Em Berlim, estuda canto e se integra ร vida cultural da cidade, freqรผenta teatros, รณperas, museus e galerias de arte. Entra em contato com as obras de Vincent van Gogh (1853-1890), Pablo Picasso (1881-1973) e Paul Klee (1879-1940). Em 1929, freqรผenta o ateliรช de pintura de Degner Klemn. Nos jardins e museus botรขnicos de Dahlen, em Berlim, entusiasma-se ao encontrar exemplares da flora brasileira. De volta ao Brasil, faz curso de pintura e arquitetura na Escola Nacional de Belas Artes de Rio de Janeiro, entre 1930 e 1934.onde รฉ aluno. Em 1932, realiza seu primeiro projeto de jardim para a residรชncia da famรญlia Schwartz, no Rio de Janeiro. Entre 1934 e 1937, ocupa o cargo de diretor de parques e jardins do Recife, Pernambuco, onde passa a residir. Nesse perรญodo, vai com freqรผรชncia ao Rio de Janeiro e tem aulas com Candido Portinari (1903-1962) e com o escritor Mรกrio de Andrade (1893-1945), no Instituto de Arte da Universidade do Distrito Federal. Em 1937, retorna ao Rio de Janeiro. O final da dรฉcada de 1930 arca a integraรงรฃo de sua obra paisagรญstica ร arquitetura moderna, รฉpoca em que o artista experimenta formas orgรขnicas e sinuosas na elaboraรงรฃo de seus projetos. Sua paixรฃo por plantas remonta ร juventude, quando se interessa por botรขnica e jardinagem, mas รฉ em 1949 que Roberto Burle Marx organiza uma grande coleรงรฃo, quando adquire um sรญtio de 800.000 mยฒ, em Campo Grande, Rio de Janeiro. Em companhia de botรขnicos, realiza inรบmeras viagens por diversas regiรตes do paรญs, para coletar e catalogar exemplares de plantas, reproduzindo em sua obra a diversidade fitogeogrรกfica brasileira. Adaptado de https://www.guiadasartes.com.br/roberto-burle-marx/biografia
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Roberto Burle Marx was a Landscaper, architect, draughtsman, painter, engraver, lithographer, sculptor, upholsterer, potter, jewelry designer, decorator. During his childhood he lived in Rio de Janeiro. He went with his family to Germany in 1928. In Berlin, he studied singing and became part of the city’s cultural life, frequenting theaters, operas, museums and art galleries. He came into contact with the works of Vincent van Gogh (1853-1890), Pablo Picasso (1881-1973) and Paul Klee (1879-1940). In 1929, he attended the painting studio of Degner Klemn. In the gardens and botanical museums of Dahlen, in Berlin, he is excited to find specimens of Brazilian flora. Back in Brazil, he studied painting and architecture at the Escola Nacional de Belas Artes (Enba), Rio de Janeiro, between 1930 and 1934. In 1932, he carried out his first garden project for the Schwartz family’s residence in Rio de Janeiro. Between 1934 and 1937, he held the position of director of parks and gardens in Recife, Pernambuco, where he took up residence. During this period, he went frequently to Rio de Janeiro and took classes with Candido Portinari (1903-1962) and with the writer Mรกrio de Andrade (1893-1945), at the Art Institute of the University of the Federal District. In 1937, he returned to Rio de Janeiro. The end of the 1930s saw the integration of his landscape work into modern architecture, a time when the artist experimented with organic and sinuous forms in the elaboration of his projects. His passion for plants dates back to his youth, when he became interested in botany and gardening, but it was in 1949 that Roberto Burle Marx organized a large collection, when he acquired an 800,000 mยฒ site in Campo Grande, Rio de Janeiro. In the company of botanists, he made numerous trips to different regions of the country to collect and catalog plant specimens, reproducing the Brazilian phytogeographic diversity in his work. Adapted from: https://www.guiadasartes.com.br/roberto-burle-marx/biografia
LIACHO, LรZARO (1906โ1969), poeta, narrador, ensayista y periodista argentino. Nacido en Buenos Aires, Liacho era hijo de Jacobo Simรณn liachovitzky (1874โ1937), un destacado periodista yiddish, que emigrรณ a Argentina en 1894, fundรณ el primer diario argentino en yiddish, Der Tog, y el semanario Der Tsionist; en 1904 ayudรณ a establecer la Federaciรณn Sionista Argentina; tambiรฉn escribiรณ una obra de teatro y cuentos. Lรกzaro Liacho estuvo asociado con los periรณdicos Mundo Israelita y Judaica, pero ganรณ reconocimiento principalmente como poeta. Su Bocado de pan (1931), Pan de Buenos Aires, 1940) y El hombre y sus moradas ,1961), reflejan su perspectiva tanto como judรญo y como argentino. Sus cuentos, Sobre el filo de la vida, 1969) tratan el Holocausto. Aunque expresรณ su amor y admiraciรณn por Israel y el sionismo, considerรณ el judaรญsmo como una realidad espiritual que se puede practicar en cualquier lugar y elogiรณ a la Argentina como “la nueva Siรณn” en los poemas recogidos en Siรณnidas desde la pampa, 1969). En su poesรญa posterior, en particular Entre Dios y Satรกn , 1966), Liacho recurriรณ a temas bรญblicos, religiosos y metafรญsicos.
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LIACHO, LรZARO (1906โ1969), Argentine poet, narrator, essayist, and journalist. Born in Buenos Aires, Liacho was the son of Jacobo Simรณn Liachovitzky (1874โ1937), a noted Yiddish journalist, who immigrated to Argentina in 1894, founded the first Argentine Yiddish daily, Der Tog, and the weekly Der Tsionist; in 1904 he helped to establish the Argentine Zionist Federation; he also wrote a play and short stories. Lรกzaro Liacho was associated with the periodicals Mundo Israelita and Judaica, but won recognition mainly as a poet. His Bocado de pan (“Morsel of Bread,” 1931), Pan de Buenos Aires (“Bread of Buenos Aires,” 1940), and El hombre y sus moradas (“Man and His Dwellings,” 1961), reflect his outlook both as a Jew and as an Argentinean. His short stories (Sobre el filo de la vida, “On Life’s Cutting Edge,” 1969) deal with the Holocaust. Though he expressed his love and admiration for Israel and Zionism, he considered Jewishness as a spiritual reality that can be practiced anywhere and praised Argentina as “the new Zion” in the poems collected in Siรณnidas desde la pampa (“Odes to Zion from the Pampa,” 1969). In his later poetry, notably Entre Dios y Satรกn (“Between God and Satan,” 1966), Liacho turned to biblical, religious, and metaphysical themes.
Daniel Samoilovich naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1949. Estudiรณ en el Colegio Nacional de Buenos Aires. En 1964 entrรณ en el equipo de la revista “Esta generaciรณn”, dirigida por Pedro Pujรณ. Comenzรณ a trabajar en el diario Clarรญn en 1969, durante 11 aรฑos. En 1978 viajรณ a Espaรฑa, y se desempeรฑรณ como redactor de la revista Triunfo y el diario El Paรญs. En 1979 dirigiรณ junto con Gloria Pampillo la revista “La construcciรณn imaginaria”, editada por el Colegio Mayor Chaminade (Madrid). Se uniรณ al matemรกtico Jaime Poniachik en 1980, para publicar la revista “Juegos para Gente de Mente”, que luego serรญa la base de la editorial “De mente”, especializada en juegos de ingenio. A partir de 1986 fue director del periรณdico Diario de poesรญa, que sale trimestralmente. Este diario ganรณ en 1990 el Primer Premio del Concurso de Publicaciones Culturales, entre otras distinciones. Entre 1997 y 2002 colabora con una columna semanal de poesรญa en la revista dominical del diario La Naciรณn. Ha escrito numerosos libros de poesรญa.
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Daniel Samoilovich (1949- ) was born in Buenos Aires . He studied at the National College of Buenos Aires. In 1964 he joined the team of the magazine “This generation”, directed by Pedro Pujรณ. He began working for Clarรญn newspaper in 1969, for 11 years. In 1978 he traveled to Spain, and worked as editor of the magazine Triunfo and the newspaper El Paรญs. In 1979, together with Gloria Pampillo, he directed the magazine “La construcciรณn imaginaria”, published by the Colegio Mayor Chaminade (Madrid). He joined the mathematician Jaime Poniachik in 1980, in publishing the magazine “Juegos para Gente de Mente”, which later became the basis of the “De mente” publishing house, specialized in ingenuity games. As of 1986 he was director of the newspaper Diario de poesรญa which comes out quarterly. This newspaper won in 1990 the First Prize of the Cultural Publications Contest, among other distinctions. He has written numerous books of poetry.
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Quรฉ clase de judรญo soy
— Una vez, un joven dirigente de una asociaciรณn comunitaria, me preguntรณ: โยฟQuรฉ clase de judรญo sos vos? No distinguรญs Kippur de Rosh Hashanรก, no crees en Dios, no celebrรกs la llegada del sรกbado… ni siquiera sabรฉs idish…โ Apenas atinรฉ a contestarle que estoy circunciso, lo cuรกl no sรฉ si le habrรก bastado. Evidentemente, de las seรฑales de pertenencia que enumerรณ, la de mรญnima era, a su entender, saber idish. Lo cierto es que me gustarรญa: me parece un idioma lleno de energรญa, adivino que es tan eficaz para el humor como para la maldiciรณn, para la felicidad y la melancolรญa… se me ocurre que ha de ser esplรฉndido para la poesรญa, tanto como, digamos, el portuguรฉs, idioma de marineros y comerciantes… quizรกs mejor… Pero el hecho es que si fuera posible graduar mis ignorancias, soy mรกs ignorante del idish que del portuguรฉs. Mi padre sรญ sabรญa, y lo hablaba con sus padres y sus hermanos, pero no con mi madre, que es mizrahi, o sea descendiente de la minorรญa de judรญos que quedรณ en Jerusalรฉn y la regiรณn cuando los demรกs partieron a la diรกspora.
— El idish era entonces el idioma de mis abuelos paternos, y su sonido venรญa mezclado con la casa en que vivรญan, baja, desangelada y enorme comparada con la mรญa; una casa con una terraza donde mi abuelo, un hombretรณn que habรญa sido herrero, se entretenรญa haciendo errรกticos arreglos y, si no habรญa nada que arreglar, desarmando cajones de fruta para rescatar y enderezar los clavos. Venรญa el idish mezclado con las disputas de aquel anciano alto y mi abuela pequeรฑita, de la que se ddecรญa que un dรญa en Ucrania habรญa escondido de una requisa de la policรญa a cuarenta personas y un revรณlver: o sea, una aldea completa en el sรณtano de su hogar ucraniano.
— A mรญ lo de los cuarenta prรณfugos se me mezclaba con la historia de Ali Babรก y los cuarenta ladrones; no entendรญa bien como cabrรญa tanta gente en el sรณtano, ni para quรฉ querรญan un revรณlver, que los incriminaba y con el cual mal podrรญan defenderse de la policรญa del zar. Tambiรฉn se decรญa que una vez que un pollo se habรญa desventurado la abuela lo habรญa agarrado, le habรญa metido las tripas para adentro y tranquilamente lo habรญa cosido y de un modo igualmente tranquilo el pollo habรญa salido caminando. La sal de la historia โque yo encontraba de algรบn modo equivalente a la de los cuarenta escondidosโ era la calma de la abuela y el pollo, y esa era, a mi pequeรฑa mente racionalista, justamente la parte mรกs dudosa. Pero nunca se me hubiera ocurrido expresar tales dudas; las historias me gustaban asรญ, y aรบn me gustan: mis abuelos habรญan vivido una gran aventura, venรญan desde muy lejos en el espacio y el tiempo, desde territorios que no necesitaban detalles ni explicaciones. Que hablaran una lengua especial, a la que se llamaba idish o jargon (la jerga) era lรณgico, viniendo, como venรญan, de otro planeta.
— Era, claro, el mismo planeta donde transcurrรญan las historias de los libros. Yo tenรญa diez, once aรฑos y leรญa todo lo que me caรญa a la mano, desde los libros de Verne o Salgari que me daban hasta los de Pearl S. Buck o Romain Rolland, que no me daban y manoteaba yo de la biblioteca de mis padres. Asรญ que cuando la abuela se enfermรณ, me encargaron que por las tardes fuera a su casa, a dos cuadras de la mรญa, a leerle cuentos y novelas. Ella hablaba, como dije, idish, ruso y castellano (despuรฉs de cuarenta aรฑos, aรบn con acento) pero era analfabeta en cualquier lengua. Despuรฉs he pensado que es raro haberle leรญdo cuentos a la abuela, en lugar de que ella me los leyera a mรญ: la lengua aparece asรญ desprovista de gravedad, desprovista del peso de la tradiciรณn. Quizรกs algo de mi deseo de escribir, o de las modalidades que ese deseo fue tomando, tengan que ver con aquel paisaje dado vuelta. O tal vez aquella ausencia de espesor de la nueva lengua alentรณ en mรญ una irresponsabilidad, una prepotencia sin la cual difรญcilmente hubiera sido escritor.
–Una vez empecรฉ a leerle Miguel Strogoff, la historia del correro que debe recorrer miles de verstas a lo largo de Siberia para llevarle al zar un mensaje de su hermano asediado por una rebeliรณn. No creo que hayamos elegido ese libro por su tema ruso, porque leรญamos de todo… pero puede que la casualidad nos hubiera llevado a aquel escenario y que, aunque lo mรกs cerca que Strogoff ha de estar de Ucrania en su carrera deben ser tres o cuatro mil kilรณmetros, todo aquello de los kirguises, los tรกrtaros, la policรญa zarista, tuviera para ella algรบn punto de interรฉs especial… En cuanto a mรญ, estaba convencido de que le estaba contando la historia de unos parientes cercanos: aquellos kanes rebeldes en cualquier momento podรญan ponerse a hablar en idish, y entonces serรญa ella la que me explicara quรฉ decรญan…
— Kafka piensa que unir la propia voz a la de otros es estar ya perdido, y empero sueรฑa a menudo con ser โplenamente judรญoโ: se fascina con los actores del teatro idish, y aรบn quisiera compartir el destino de los mรญseros emigrantes del Este que ve en una barraca esperando el permiso para partir a Amรฉrica. Pertenencia, identidad, son para รฉl a veces imagen de la salvaciรณn, a veces de la condena. Si bien se piensa, se podrรญa decir lo mismo de la soledad: tambiรฉn ella es para รฉl, alternativamente, salvaciรณn y condena. Uno se pregunta entonces si no es esta, finalmente, la condiciรณn natural del escritor. Ser โplenamenteโ parte de un colectivo quizรกs resolverรญa muchas angustias… pero junto con el agua sucia, es muy posible que se fuera tambiรฉn el niรฑo.
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What Kind of Jew Am I
โOnce, a young director of a Jewish community association, asked me, โWhat kind of Jew are you?โ?โ You donโt know the difference between Rosh HaShonah and Yom Kippur, you donโt believe in God, you donโt celebrate the arrival of Shabbat. . .You donโt even know Yiddish. . .โ I hardly had time to answer him that I a circumcised, which I donโt know would have been enough for him. Evidently, of the indications of belonging that he enumerated, the least important one was, in his way of understanding, to know Yiddish. Itโs true that I would like to; it seems to be a language that is full of energy, I infer that it is as effective for humor as for cursing, for happiness and melancholy. . .it must be splendid for poetry, as much as, letโs say Portuguese, the language of sailors and merchants. . . perhaps more so. . .But the fact is that if it were possible to grade my ignorance, Iโm more ignorant of Yiddish than of Portuguese. My father did know it, and he spoke it with his parents and his brothers and sisters, but not with my mother, who is Mizrachi, a descendent of the minority of Jews who remained in Jerusalem and the region when the others left for the diaspora.
โYiddish was then the language of my paternal grandparents, and its sound came mixed with the house in which they lived, low, misshapen and enormous compared with mine a house with a terrace where my grandfather, a large man who had been a blacksmith, entertained himself making erratic rearrangements, and if there was nothing to rearrange, taking apart large crates of fruit to rescue and harden the nails. The Yiddish came mixed into disputes between that old man and my little-bitty grandmother of whom it was said that one day in Ukraine she had hidden a from a police raid forty people and a revolver; or letโs say, a complete village, in the basement of her Ukrainian home.”
โFor me, the business of the forty fugitives got mixed up with the story of Ali Baba and the forty thieves, I donโt understand how so many people would fit in the basement, or why they would want a revolver, that incriminated them and with which they could hardly defend themselves from the Tzarโs police. Itโs also said that once a chicken was unlucky, my grandmother had grabbed it, she had put its guts inside and tranquilly cooked it and in an equally tranquil way, the chicken, had left, walking away. The heart of the storyโthat I found similar to the forty hidden thieves was the calm of my grandmother and the chicken, and that was, to my small rationalist mind, the most dubious, But, it never would have occurred to me to express such doubts; I liked the stories as they were, and I still like them: my grandparents had led a great adventure, they came from far, far away in space and time, from territories that didnโt need details or explications. That they spoke a special language, that was called Yiddish or jargon ( ) was logical, coming, as they came, from another planet.โ
โIt was, of course, the same planet where the stories from books happened. I was ten, eleven years old, and I read everything that fell into my hands, from the books of Verne and Salgari that they gave me to Pearl Buck or Romain Rolland, that they didnโt give me, and I swiped from my parentโs library. So that when my grandmother got sick, they sent me out from home, in the afternoons, to her house, two blocks from mine, to read her stories and novels. She spoke, as I said, Yiddish, Russian and Spanish (after forty years and still with an accent) but she was illiterate in any language. Later on, I have thought that it was strange for me to have read stories to my grandmother, instead of her reading them to me; my tongue seems devoid of gravity, devoid of the weight of the weight of tradition. Perhaps. Something of my desire to write, of the forms that desired were taking, may have something to do with that up-sided-own landscape. Or perhaps that lack of pressure of the new language encouraged me to an irresponsibility, an arrogance without which it would have been difficult to be a writer.”
โOnce I began to read Michael Strogoff by Jules Verne, the story of the mailman who had to cross thousands of versts across Siberia to bring the Tzar a message from his brother, besieged by a rebellion. I donโt believe that we had chosen this book for its Russian them, because we read everything. . .but it could be the but it could have been chance that brought us to that scenario and that, although the closest that Strogoff got to Ukraine in his race must be three or four thousand kilometers, everything about the Kirguese, the Tartars, the tzarist police, had for here some point of special interest. . .As for me, I was convinced that I was retelling the story some relatives: those rebel Kanes, at any moment could begin to speak in Yiddish, and then it would be her who would explain to me what they were saying. . .”
โKafka thinks that to join your own voice to that of others is to be already lost, and that it is necessary to often dream about being โfully Jewish,โ he was fascinated by the actors of the Yiddish theater, and he even wanted to share the fate of the miserable emigrants from the East that he sees in a barracks awaiting permission to leave for America. Belonging, identity, are for him, at times, the image of salvation, at times of condemnation. If you think about it, the same thing could be said about solitude: it is also that way for him, alternatively, salvation and condemnation. You then ask it is not, finally, the natural condition of a writer. To be โfullyโ part of a collective would perhaps resolve many anxieties. . .but together with the bath water, itโs very likely that the baby went too.”
2018, Cuadernos Lรญrico, Parรญs
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Algunos de los libros de Daniel Samoilovich/Some of Daniel Samoilovich’s Books
Sergio Chejfec naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1956, empezรณ a publicar en revistas literarias mientras trabajaba como librero, taxista u oficinista. En 1990, ya en Caracas, se integrรณ a la redacciรณn de la revista cultural y de ciencias sociales Nueva Sociedad. El autor recibiรณ el premio Konex, fue becario de la Fundaciรณn Guggenheim y residente en Civitella Ranieri (Italia) y la Maison des รcrivains รtrangers et des Traducteurs (MEET) de Saint-Nazaire. Publicรณ las novelas Lenta biografรญa y Moral (1990). Le sucedieron tรญtulos como El aire (1992), Cinco (1996), El llamado de la especie (1997), Los planetas (1999), Boca de lobo (2000), Los incompletos (2004), Baroni: un viaje(2007), Mis dos mundos(2008), La experiencia dramรกtica (2012) y la colecciรณn de cuentos Modo linterna (2013). Tambiรฉn publicรณ libros de poemas como Tres poemas y una merced (2002), Gallos y huesos (2003), y los ensayos El punto vacilante (2005) y Sobre Giannuzzi (2010). Sus รบltimos libros, caracterรญsticos de la hibridez genรฉrica y la renombrada incertidumbre referencial que definรญa su estilo, fueron รltimas noticias de la escritura (2016), El visitante (2017), Teorรญa del ascensor (2018), 5 (2019) y No hablen de mรญ: una vida y su museo (2021). Adaptado de Letralia.
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Sergio Chejfec was born in Buenos Aires in 1956. He began to publish in literary magazines while he worked as a bookseller, taxi driver or clerk. In 1990, already in Caracas, he joined the editorial staff of the cultural and social science magazine Nueva Sociedad. The author received the Konex award, was a fellow of the Guggenheim Foundation and a resident at Civitella Ranieri (Italy) and the Maison des รcrivains รtrangers et des Traducteurs (MEET) in Saint-Nazaire. He published the novels Lenta biografรญa and Moral (1990). Titles such as El aire (1992), Cinco (1996), The call of the species (1997), Los planetas (1999), Boca de lobo (2000), Los incompletos (2004), Baroni: un viaje (2007) followed. , Mis dos mundos (2008), La experiencia dramรกtica (2012) and the collection of stories Modo Linterna (2013). He also published books of poems such as Tres poemas y una merced (2002), Gallos y huesos (2003), and the essays El punto vacilante (2005) and Sobre Giannuzzi (2010). His latest books, characteristic of the generic hybridity and the renowned referential uncertainty that defined his style, were รltimas Noticias de la Lectura (2016), El visitante (2017), Teorรญa del ascensor (2018), 5 (2019) and No hablen de mรญ: una vida y su museo (2021). Adapted from Letralia.
Esas preguntas eran, ahora pienso, una materia sutil de imaginar; yo imaginaba caras, gestos, ojos. Tambiรฉn eran la forma de pensarla familia que mi padre no tenรญa. Suponรญa las caras de mis tรญos como variaciones leves de la suya, a pesar de que sus voces les concedรญa mayor flexibilidad: podรญan ser mรกs agudas o graves que la de รฉl. Creo que si mi imaginaciรณn era mรกs permisiva en relaciรณn con ellas que con las caras, lo que fue justamente porque con su voz mi padre se distanciabaโde un modo permanenteโde lo que me rodea; รฉl hablaba otros idiomas y hablabaโhabla mal el mรญo. Ruso, idisch, polaco, salรญan de su boca graves con la naturalidad que ortagaba el uso y con el infinito matiz de entonaciones que concede la total identificaciรณn la total identificaciรณn con el universo de la lengua.
Supongamos que escapando, mi padre vino a Buenos Aires escapรกndole a la guerra ya terminada, o mรกs bien, o mรกs bien quizรก a sus consecuencias y recuerdos. Espantado de hambre; tambiรฉnโsupongo– con la intenciรณn de radicarse. De aquellos judรญos, los que no huyeron espantados casi todos terminaron muriรฉndose asesinados; seis de ellos fueron mis tรญos, dos de ellos mis abuelos, o sea sus padres. El siempre tuvo respuestas escuetas para referirse a su familia desaparecida: cuรกntos eran hombres, cuรกntos mujeres, quรฉ lugar ocupaba รฉl en la escala cronolรณgica, la diferencia de edad entre sus padres, y cosas por el estilo. Ese recato no estaba dado a su parte por una abierta y explรญcita negaciรณn a profundizar en estas cuestiones (en realidad mรกs bien siempre se cuida de sugiera una circunstancia en la que se pudiese preguntar por ellas), sino que nos contagiaba el tono de sus respuestas precisas y lรกnguidas, que se rezumaban y transmitรญan un despego profundo con su pasado. Sin embargo, si ese alejamiento existรญa realmente, de noche desaparecรญa: nosotros sabรญamos que soรฑaba de manera cotidiana con sus hermanos y padres, y era esto lo que nos desconcertaba.
Es como si los muertos nos visitaran como vivos, pero ataviados por nosotros. Esas cosas no reflejaba yo cuando era chico; imaginaba difusas las caras que mis tรญos tendrรญan. Aรฑos despuรฉs me darรญa cuenta de que intentaba reconstruir y recordar un pasado que no me pertenecรญa directamente: esa pertenencia estaba dada por la persona de mi padre. Tambiรฉn pienso ahora que si yo querรญa sospechar sus caras y sus voces no era, bien miradas las cosas, porque rechazara la idea de que no pudiera conocerlos, sino todo lo contrario: su condiciรณn de muertos, de inexistentes, de personas que ya nunca volverรญan, fue la manera natural que para mรญ siempre tuvieron, con cierta matiz diferente–o sea sus carรกcter de desaparecidosโen relaciรณn a mi padre. Ellos eran su sombra natural, el pasado y su espacio virtual desde donde รฉl habรญa venido. (Fisgoneaba, oteaba, prรกcticamente vigilaba su cara para suponer las posibles variaciones de las arrugas y los gestos en relaciรณn a aquel conjunto misterioso e inexistente que habรญa sido su seno; y lo que atisbaba eran las tรญmidas sugerencias que me ofrecรญan sus rasgos.)
Hace cierto tiempo una tarde mi padre aumentรณ, sin saberlo, es espacio oscuro de donde provino y provenรญa cuando era niรฑo: me dijo, con su voz lenta y grave, con distintas palabras, que el pueblo donde รฉl naciรณ y viviรณ quince aรฑos no existรญa, se habรญa destruido en la guerra. Sin dejar rastros, pensรฉ yo, como sus padres y hermanos, que sin embargo, tienen la cara de mi padre en mi recuerdo de infancia. Es que como si los muertos nos visitaran a los vivos, pero ataviados por nosotros. Un hermano, para รฉl, era un hermano; para mรญ, un tรญo, casi era รฉl. Mi padre era todo lo que รฉl decรญa que habรญa tenido; era, al mismo tiempo, testimonio y causa. El atavรญo, a estos muertos ignotos, era yes puesto por mรญ utilizando la figura de mi padre.
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“Slow Biography”
These questions were, I now think, a subtle subject for imagination; I imagined faces, gestures, eyes. They were also the way of thinking about the family that my father didnโt have. I conceived the faces of my uncles and aunts to be slight variations of his, although I conceded more flexibility to their voices; they could be higher or lower than his. I believe that if my imagination was more permissive in relation to them than with the faces, that was justified because, with his voice, my father distanced himselfโin a permanent wayโfrom what surrounded me; he spoke other languages and he spoke mine poorly. Russian, Yiddish, Polish from his mouth came deep sounds and with the naturalness that use bestows and with the infinite shades of intonations that grants the total identification with the universe of the language.
Letโs suppose that escaping, my father came to Buenos Aires, ridding himself from the war that was already ended, or better said, perhaps its consequences and memories. Terrified by hunger alsoโI supposeโwith the intention of settling there. Of those Jews, those who did not flee terrified, almost all ended up murdered; six of them were my uncles and aunts, two of them my grandparents, or his parents, and things like that. He always had terse answers when referring to his family, how many women, how many men, the place they occupied in the family chronology, the difference in age between his parents, and things like that. That restraint didnโt come from him through an open and explicit negation to go deeper into these questions (in reality more because he is careful not to hint at a circumstance that would lead to our asking about them), but what infected us was the tone of his precise and languid answers that summarized and transmitted a profound detachment from his past. Nevertheless, if that distancing really existed, at night it disappeared: we knew that he dreamed in an ordinary manner about his brothers and parents, and that is what disconcerted us.
It is as if the dead visited us as if they were alive, but dressed up by us. I didnโt think about such things when I was little; I imagined, in a diffuse way, the faces that my uncles and aunts would have. Years later, I came to the conclusion that I tried to reconstruct and remember a past that didnโt directly belong to me; that ownership was given by way of my father. I also now think that if I wanted to guess at at their faces and voices, it wasnโt because, seeing things clearly, I rejected the idea that I could never get to know them, but just the opposite: their condition of being dead, non-existent, of people who will never return, was the natural way for me that they always had, with a certain different tingeโor perhaps their state of being disappearedโin relation to my father. They were his natural shadow, the past and his virtual space from which he had come. (I snooped, examined, practically watched his face to guess the possible variations of his wrinkles and his gestures in relation to that mysterious and inexistent group that had been his refuge; and what it hinted at were the timid suggestions that didnโt provide me with their basic characteristics.)
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย Some time ago, one afternoon, my father increased, without knowing it, the dark space from which he comes or came when he was a boy: he told me, with his slow and deep voice, with precise words, that the town where he was born and lived for fifteen years didnโt exist, it had been destroyed in the war. Without leaving traces, I thought, like his parents and brothers, who, nevertheless, have my fatherโs face in my childhood memory. It is as if the dead visit the living, but dressed up by us. A brother, for him, was a brother; for me, an uncle, was almost him. My father was everything that he said he had had, he was, at the same time, proof and cause. The clothing, of these unknown dead, was and is created by me, using my fatherโs figure as a model.
Ana Marรญa Shua naciรณ en Buenos Aires. Siendo hija de padre padres judรญos, padre libanรฉs y madre polaca, que emigraron en los aรฑos 20 a Argentina. A los 15 aรฑos publicรณ su primer libro de poesรญa, El sol y yo que fue un รฉxito. Recibiรณ dos premios, el Premio estรญmulo del Fondo Nacional de las Artes y la Faja de Honor de la Sociedad Argentina de Escritores. Estudiรณ literatura en la Universidad de Buenos Aires donde obtuvo un Mรกster en Art. En 1976, hubo un golpe de estado en Argentina Shua se dirigiรณ voluntariamente al exilio en Parรญs y trabajรณ como editora para la revista espaรฑola “Cambio 16”. Regresรณ al cabo de un aรฑo a su tierra natal y publicรณ su primera novela Soy Paciente en Buenos Aires en 1980, considerada por los crรญticos metรกfora interpretada por el rรฉgimen dictatorial. Algunas de sus obras fueron traducidas a mรบltiples lenguas y dos de sus novelas fueron llevadas al cine: Soy Paciente (1986) y Los amores de Laurita (1986). Desde entonces ha publicado mรกs de ochenta libros de muchos gรฉneros, incluyendo: novelas, cuentos, micro-ficciones, poesรญa, teatro, literatura infantil, literatura cรณmica, la antologรญa, ensayos y guiones cinematogrรกficos y artรญculos periodรญsticos. Ha recibido numerosos premios nacionales e internacionales, incluyendo una beca otorgada por la John Simon Guggenheim Memorial Foundation. Es particularmente famosa en el mundo de habla hispana como la “Reina de la Microficciรณn”.
Ana Marรญa Shua was born in Buenos Aires. Being the daughter of a Jewish father, a Lebanese father and a Polish mother, who emigrated to Argentina in the 1920s. At the age of 15, he published his first book of poetry, El sol y yo, which was a success. He received two awards, the Stimulus Award from the National Fund for the Arts and the Belt of Honor from the Argentine Society of Writers. She studied literature at the University of Buenos Aires where she obtained a Master’s in Art. In 1976, there was a coup in Argentina. Shua voluntarily went into exile in Paris and worked as an editor for the Spanish magazine “Cambio 16”. He returned to his homeland after a year and published his first novel Soy paciente in Buenos Aires in 1980, considered by critics to be a metaphor interpreted by the dictatorial regime. Some of his works were translated into multiple languages โโand two of his novels were made into movies: Soy paciente(1986) and Los amores de Laurita (1986). Since then he has published more than eighty books of many genres, including: novels, short stories, micro-fictions, poetry, theater, children’s literature, comic literature, the anthology, essays and film scripts and newspaper articles. He has received numerous national and international awards, including a fellowship from the John Simon Guggenheim Memorial Foundation. She is particularly famous in the Spanish-speaking world as the “Queen of Microfiction”.
Cuando el mayor de los hijos del abuelo Gedalia y la babuela, el que llegarรญa a ser, con el tiempo el tรญo Silvestre, empezรณ a ir a la escuela, todavรญa (como suele suceder con los hijos mayores en las familias de inmigrantes pobres) no dominaba el idioma del paรญs.
Esa desventaja con respecto a los compaรฑeros le produjo grandes sufrimientos morales. Tardรณ pocos meses en poseer un vocabulario tan amplio como cualquiera d e los demรกs chicos, modificรณ con gran rapidez sus errores sintรกcticos y gramaticales en castellano, pero le llevรณ aรฑos enteros llegar a pronunciar la terrible erre de la lengua espaรฑola, la fricativa alveolar sonora: la punta de su lengua resistรญa a vibrar con ese sonido de motor que escuchaba y envidiaba en niรฑos mucho mรกs pequeรฑos que รฉl, vibraciรณn que era capaz de imitar con el labio superior, pero no con el maldito punta de su lengua. (Pinche, que aprendiรณ a hablar imitรกndolo a Silvestre, como lo imitaba en todo lo demรกs, nunca pudo llegar a pronunciar la doble erre, que a Silvestre sรณlo se le entregรณ mucho despuรฉs, ya en plena adolescencia).
Decรญ regalo, le decรญan los otros chicos. Decรญ erre con erre guitarra, le decรญan. Decรญ que rรกpido ruedan las ruedas, las ruedas del ferrocarril. Y cuando escribรญa, Silvestre confundiรณ territorio con terรญtorrio y la maestra se sorprendรญa de esa dificultad en un alumno tan bueno, tan brillante, tan reiteradamente abanderado.
Entonces, un dรญa, llegรณ Silvestre enojado y decidido a la Casa Vieja y declarรณ que en esa casa no se iba a hablar nunca mรกs el Otro Idioma, el que sus padres habรญan traรญdo con ellos del otro lado del mar. Ese idioma agonizante que tampoco en el paรญs donde el abuelo Gedalia y la babuela habรญan vivido era la lengua de todos, la lengua de la mayorรญa, que ni siquiera era la lengua que los habรญan obligado a usar en la escuela pรบblica, pero que sรญ habรญa sido el idioma para ellos, el Idioma de sus padres y el de sus amigos y el de juegos infantiles y las canciones de cuna y las primeras palabras de amor los insultos y, par siempre, el Idioma de los nรบmeros: el รบnico Idioma en el que era posible hacer las cuentas . El Otro Idioma, el รญntimo, el propio, el verdadero, el รบnico, el Idioma de ningรบn paรญs, el Idioma que tantos se burlaban, al que muchos llamaban jerga, el Idioma que nadie, salvo ellos y los que eran como ellos, respetaban y querรญan. El Idioma que estaba condenado a morir con su generaciรณn.
Y sin embargo cuando llegรณ Silvestre, llegรณ ese dรญa en la escuela y sin sacarse el delantal declarรณ que la seรฑorita habรญa dado el orden que en su casa tenรญan que hablar solamente castellano, nadie se sorprendiรณ.
Al abuelo Gedalia le gustรณ mucho la idea por dos razones: porque necesitaba, para su trabajo de kuentenik, es decir, vendedor, mejorar todo lo posible en su habilidad con la lengua del paรญs en quรฉ vivรญa, y tambiรฉn porque se le presentaba una oportunidad mรกs de humillar a su mujer delante de sus hijos (esa actividad era una de sus diversiones preferidas).
A la babuela, que nunca habรญa hablado de corrido la lengua de la mayorรญa, ni siquiera en su paรญs de origen, el castellano le parecรญa un idioma brutal, inexpresivo, y sobre todo inaccesible, y hasta ese momento se las habรญa rebuscado con gestos con gestos y sonrisas u algunas palabras para hacer las compras. En la รฉpoca en la cual el carnicero regalaba el hรญgado para el gato de la casa. La babuela seรฑalaba el trozo de hรญgado sangrante y sonreรญa muy avergonzada y el carnicero
Se lo envolvรญa en un pedazo grande de papel de diario.
Pero si asรญ lo habรญa dicho la seรฑorita, asรญ debรญa ser. La babuela le tenรญa miedo a la maestra, que era para ella casi un funcionario de control fronterizo, alguien destacado por las autoridades de inmigraciรณn para vigilar desde adentro a las familias inmigrantes y asegurarse de que se fundieran correctamente el crisol de razas.
Y asรฎ fue como el idioma de las canciones de cuna y las palabras de amor y los insultos de lo que con el tiempo llegaron a ser los abuelos, desapareciรณ, al menos en la superficie, de la casa de la familia Rimetka, quedรณ para siempre encerrado en el dormitorio grande y los hermanos menores apenas lo entendรญan.
Fuera del dormitorio, el abuelo Gedalia se complacรญa en no entenderse con su mujer en castellano de manera mรกs completa y al mismo tiempo mรกs sutil que la que usaban para no entenderse en la que era para ambos su Lengua natal. Es por eso que en el Libro de los Recuerdos son muy pocas o ninguna las palabras que no aparecen en castellano.
Ana Marรญa Shua. El libro de los recuerdos. Buenos Aires: Editorial Sudamericana, 1994, 21-23.
When the eldest of Grandfather Gedalia and Grannyโs children began attending school, he still hadnโt mastered the language of the country (as was customary with the eldest in families of poor immigrants.)
This disadvantage, in terms of his relationship with other school mates, caused him great suffering. Yet it didnโt take him long to acquire an ample vocabulary equal to the other students, and he quickly learned how to mitigate his syntactical and grammatical errors in Spanish. Nevertheless, it took him several years to learn to roll that terrible Spanish double rr, that sonorous alveolar fricative in which the tip of his tongue refused to vibrate like the sound of a motorโyou knowโyou know, vrrrrrrmโthat he would hear children younger than him pronounce, making him envious, a sound that he could imitate with his upper lip but not with that damned tip of his tongue.
Pucho, the second in line, who learned to speak by imitating Silvester (he imitated Silvester did), never did learn how to pronounce that double rr either, the same one that Silvester only managed to acquire much later in life, when he was already a teenager,
โSay rrrregalo,โ the other children would tell him. Or, theyโd tell him to say โrr and rr, guitarraโโ rรกpido ruedan las ruedas, laas recueros del ferrocarril.โ And when he would write, Silvester always put teritorio for territorio, which surprised the teacher because Silvester was such a good student, so brilliant, a real standard bearer.
Then on day, Silvester, who had become visibly upset, arrived at the Old House, having made up his mind that never again in that house was anyone was going to speak the Other Language, the one his parents had brought over from the old country; the language that was dying and wasnโt even the main language spoken in his parentโs native land, or taught in the public schools they had attended. It had been the language commonly used by their parents among their friends, for childrenโs games and lullabies, for their first words of love, for insulting, and always, counting; the only language in which they could do their adding and subtracting. It was that Other Language, the intimate language, the one they could call their own, the true language, the only language, the language, the one language
that knew no national boundaries, the one language that people joked about, the one so many people called jargon, the language that no one, except for them and others like them, loved and respected. The language was condemned to die with them.
And yet no one was when Silvester came home from school that day and, even before taking off his school uniform, that the teacher had told them to speak only Spanish at home.
Grandfather Gedalia liked the idea for two reasons: it enhanced his work as a peddler, that is to say, salesman, because it was a good opportunity to improve his Spanish. And also, because it gave him the opportunity to humiliate his wife in front of his children (which gave much pleasure.)
For Granny, who didnโt even manage well in the majority of her country back home, Spanish seemed like a harsh, unexpressive language that was, above all, inaccessible. Up until that time, she had done her shopping mainly by gesturing and smiling. That was when the butcher at the meat market would give her liver for the cat. Granny would point at the bloody piece of meat and smile embarrassingly while the butcher wrapped it up in a large piece of newspaper.
But if thatโs what the teacher had ordered. Thatโs the way it had to be. Granny was a little afraid of the teacher who seemed to her more like a member of the border patrol under orders from the immigration authorities keeping an eye on immigrants and making sure they conform, integrate, and become part of the melting pot.
And, hence, thatโs how the grandparents became identified with the language of lullabies, love, and insults that in time began to disappear, at least on the surface of things, from the home of the Rimetka family. Once it became confined to the master bedroom, the two younger children, never did fully grasp the language.
Beyond the bedroom. Grandfather Gedalia was quite happy not understanding his wife in Spanish, just as they didnโt understand each other in their native language. For that reason, you will only find Spanish in the Book of Memories.
Ana Marรญa Shua. Albuquerque: The Book of Memories. The University of New Mexico Press, 1998. Trans. by Dick Gerdes. pp. 17-19
Marta Riskin naciรณ en Rosario, Argentina. Es antropรณloga y escritora. Ha participado en multitudes de proyectos privados y estatales de tecnologรญa de la informaciรณn y la influencia polรญtica de las formas mediรกticas. Ha publicado una novel Y serรกs como un รกrbol. Ha realizado estudios sobre las religiones del extremo oriente y acerca de temas vinculados con la Cรกbala.
Marta Riskin was born in Rosario, Argentina. She is an anthropologist and writer. He has participated in multitudes of private and government projects on information technology and the political influence of media forms. He has published a novel And you will be like a tree. He has conducted studies on the religions of the Far East and on issues related to the Kabbalah.
Cuento de:/Story from: fragmento de/excerpt from: โY serรกs como un รกrbol.โ Ricardo Feierstein y Stephen A. Sadow. Eds. Recreando la cultura argentina 1894-2001: En el umbral del segundo siglo. Buenos Airesโ Editorial Milรก, 2002, pp. 392-394.
Es una historia antigua que estรก en el presente y camina hacia tu futuro.
Lo conocen los grillos y la contemplan emocionadas en sus viajes las estrellas fijas.
Dan fe de ella, los manuscritos con que los hombres han perpetuado antiguos mensajes.
Ahora, es necesario que tรบ la recuerdes.
Tambiรฉn he dudado. . . ยฟQuรฉ tenemos en comรบn yo, รrbol y tรบ, Humano?
ยฟCuรกl lengua comparten una estrella y un grillo?
ยฟQuรฉ podrรญa saber nuestro sol de otros soles?
Individualizamos por el lenguaje, serados por nuestras fronteras, aprendiendo a travรฉs de distintos รณrganos de percepciรณn. . .
ยฟQuรฉ nos acercarรก?
ยฟCรณmo darte algo mรกs que mis frutos?
ยฟCรณmo recibir algo distinto a tus cuidados y tu sierra?
De todos modos lo intentarรฉ. Cumple Esperanza no olvido.
Los antiguos dicen. . .En el comienzo, el Creador รบnico y solitario en su bondad decidiรณ decir y dijo.
Dijo Luz y v la luz se hizo. Y la separรณ de las sombras
Dijo cielos, tierra y mares. Y vio que era bueno.
Dijo plantas y รกrboles y nos creรณ.
Dijo animales y fueron vivos. Mรกs el hombre lo formรณ a su imagen y semejanza para que lo nombrara, cuidara y reservara sus creaturas. Y entonces descansรณ y celebrรณ lo creado.
Enamorado de su obra, el Creador esperaba el hombre tambiรฉn esperaba el hombre tambiรฉn la amara sintiendo la alegrรญa y la belleza de cada ser.
Para que pudiera compartir tanto amor, del propio costado del hombre, de sus huesos y su sangre, el Seรฑor modelรณ la mujer.
Era la edad de la inocencia.
Sรณlo deben elegir la รบnica ley que el Hacedor les habรญa impuesto: No comer del รกrbol del conocimiento del bien y del mal. Como Padre y Maestro habรญa explicado el motivo de la prohibiciรณn: no debรญan elementarse del conocimiento para aprender vivisecciona, desintegra, divide. Mata.
El hombre y la mujer decidieron desobedecer porque deseaban poder. Poder sin responsabilidad.
Ni siquiera reconocieron haber elegido comer el fruto prohibido, culpรกndose el uno al otro. Separรกndose.
No sabรญan amar a las otras criaturas, sin adueรฑarse y demostrarse cuanto dominio ejercรญan sobre ellos.
Ni siquiera advirtieron que al manipularse, renunciaban a parte de sรญ mismos: sutiles notas musicales que iluminaban de alegrรญa su mundo.
Olvidaron nutrirse del รกrbol de la vida que tambiรฉn en el centro, del dulce fruto del conocimiento integrado a lo vida. Del saber que se comprende reuniendo, abrazando y reverenciando cada una de las obras del Creador.
Dicen los antiguos que por extraรฑos motivos, el hombre no supo agradecer y apreciar aquello que le fuera dado sin esfuerzo propio.
Tendrรญa que aprender la diferencia entre el bien y el mal para reencontrar el รกrbol de la vida
ยกQuรฉ largo para el hombre construir su camino al retorno!
Resultaba difรญcil ayudarlo. Sus vibraciones se habรญan alejado demasiado de la nuestra, los รกrboles.
Nos extraรฑaba, sin reconocer nuestro parentesco.
En sus mejores momentos, suspirarรญa reflejando la hermosura en nosotros o se conmoverรญa por nuestro esfuerza de alturas, que era tambiรฉn el suyo y en otros suspenderรญa nos aterrarรญa proyectando sin versos nuevos objetos.
Con la paciencia que el Seรฑor nos enseรฑara, le enviรกbamos seรฑales, opacado el verde de nuestras hojas debilitando nuestros troncos. Era doloroso acompaรฑar la pena human con la nuestra.
Pretendรญa curarnos (para el hombre y para mรญ, la vida seguirรญa el centro mรกs preciado, aunque รฉl no pudiera aรบn reconocerlo), con polvos, brebajes y extraรฑos aparatos de su invenciรณn.
Dicen los antiguos que un dรญa el hombre apoyarรก sus manos en mi cuerpo, verรก hasta mi alma y recordarรก nuestra comรบn historia. Sabrรก es mi guardiรกn y mi amigo. No el Creador ni el Depredador.
Entonces alcanzaremos universos fantรกsticos.
Armarรฉ el prรณjimo como a sรญ mismo.
Dejarรก de matarse y matarme.
Serรก la justicia su vestimenta y la fe su armadura.
Transformarรก las espadas en arados y sus lanzas en tijeras y dejarรก de estudiar el arte de la guerra.
Se regocijarรก la tierra, se alegrarรกn las multitudes de las islas.
Desde algรบn lugar el รกrbol de la vida y desde aquรญ los รกrboles de formas mรบltiples, seguimos creciendo en el corazรณn del hombre.
Cumple Esperanza esta tarea de volver a ser Uno, dicen los antiguos.
It is an ancient story that exists in the present and moves toward the future.
The crickets know it and contemplate the fixed stars excited by their voyages.
They put their faith in it, the manuscripts with with which men have perpetuated ancient messages.
Now, it is necessary that you remember it.
I have doubted it too. . .What do we have in common, I, Tree, and you, Human?
What language do a star and a cricket share?
What could our sum know of other suns?
We individualize by language, XXX by our borders, learning through distinct organs of perception.
What will come near us?
How can I give your more than my fruits?
How to receive something different from your affection and your saw?
In any case, I will try it. โHe fulfills Hopesโ doesnโt forget;
He said Light and there was light. And he separated it from the shadows.
He said plants and animals and created us.
He said animals and they were alive. But Man, he formed in his image and likeness so he that could name, care for and set aside his creatures. And then he rested and celebrated the creation.
In love with his work, the Creator hoped that man that man also hoped; he hoped the man also love, feeling the joy and beauty of every being.
In order that he could share so much love, from nanโs own side, of his bones and his blood, the Lord modeled woman.
It was the age of innocence;
They only have to choose the only lay that the Maker had imposed on them: Do not eat from the tree of knowledge to learn
do vivisection, disintegrate, divide. Kill.
The man and the woman decided to disobey because they wanted power. Power without responsibility. They didnโt even acknowledge having eaten the prohibited fruit, each blaming each other.
They separated.
They didnโt know how to love the other creatures, without taking power over them and demonstrating how much control they exercised over them.
They didnโt even acknowledge that by changing a part of themselves: subtle musical notes that illuminate the joy of their world.
They forgot how to take nutrition from the tree of life, that in the center, from the sweet fruit of knowledge to integrate life. From the knowing that comes from reuniting, giving hugs and revering ever one of the works of the Creator.
The ancients say that for strange motives, man didnโt know how thank and appreciate that which was given to him without his own doing.
He would have to learn the difference between good and evil to find the tree of life again.
How long it would be for man to construct his way of return!
It was difficult to help him. His vibrations had gone so far from ours, the trees.
He missed us, without recognizing our relationship.
During his best moments, he would sigh, reflecting the beauty in us or would feel for our strength in the heights, that were also his, and during other moments, he would lay off XXXX projecting new objects without verses.
With the patience that the Lord taught us, we sent signals, covering the green of our leaves, weakening our trunks. It was painful to accompany the human pain with ours.
He intended to cure us (for man, for me, life would continue being the most valued center, although man still couldnโt recognize it,) with powders, potions and strange apparatus of his invention.
The ancient say that one day, man will help lean his hands on my body, will see as far as my soul and will remember our common history. He will know that he is my guardian and my friend. Not the Creator or the Predator.
Then we will reach fantastic universes.
I will make the neighbor into himself.
He will stop killing himself and killing me.
Justice will be his clothing and faith his armor.
He will transform swords into plowshares and his lances into scissors and will cease studying the art of war.
The world will rejoice , the multitudes of the islands will be glad.
From somewhere, the tree of life and from here the trees of multiple forms. We will continue growing in manโs heart.
โHope Servesโ this task of returning to be One,. The ancients say.
Isidoro Blaisten (Ike). fue escritor y poeta argentino, nacido en Concordia (Entre Rรญos), en 1933. Su primera obra fue el libro de poemas Sucediรณ en la lluvia (1965), sin embargo, nunca volviรณ a publicar poesรญa.Su primera colecciรณn de cuentos, La felicidad (1969), incluรญa el humor negro de “El tรญo Facundo” y el retrato social de “Los tarmas”, donde los miembros de una familia se alimentan de los canapรฉs que sirven en fiestas donde no han sido invitados. Despuรฉs llegaron La salvaciรณn (1972), El mago (1975) y uno de los libros mรกs celebrados, Dublรญn al Sur (1980). Cerrado por melancolรญa (1981). Entre sus libros de cuentos fueron: Cuentos anteriores (1982), Carroza y reina (1986) y Al acecho (1995), En sus relatos, Blaisten presenta con gran humor las peculiaridades de la sociedad urbana actual, donde se funde con la ironรญa y lo crรญtico para describir las caracterรญsticas lingรผรญsticas de sus personajes. Poco antes de su muerte publicรณ su primera novela, Voces en la noche, Su protagonista es un vendedor de lencerรญa que se convierte en el principal enemigo de una organizaciรณn decidida a acabar con la literatura. En Anticonferencias (1983), consiguiรณ unir el ensayo y la narrativa. Miembro de la Academia Argentina de Letras y miembro correspondiente de la Real Academia Espaรฑola, Blaisten recibiรณ, entre otras muchas distinciones, la Faja de Honor de la Sociedad Argentina de Escritores (SADE), el Premio Konex de Platino y el Premio Anual a la Trayectoria Artรญstica del Fondo Nacional de las Artes. Falleciรณ en 2004. Adaptado de Biografรญas.com
________________________________
Isidoro Blaisten (Ike)was an Argentine writer and poet, born in Concordia (Entre Rรญos), in 1933. His first work was the book of poems It happened in the rain (1965), however, he never published poetry again. His first collection of short stories, Happiness (1969), included the black humor of “El uncle Facundo” and the social portrait of “Los tarmas”, where the members of a family eat the canapรฉs that they serve at parties where they have not been invited. Then came Salvation (1972), The Wizard (1975) and one of the most celebrated books, Dublin to the South (1980). Closed for Melancholy (1981). Among his story books were: Cuentos anteriores (1982), Carroza y Reina (1986) and Lurking (1995), In his stories, Blaisten presents with great humor the peculiarities of today’s urban society, where he merges with irony and the critical CCC to describe the linguistic characteristics of their characters. Shortly before his death, he published his first novel, Voices in the Night. Its protagonist is a lingerie salesman who becomes the main enemy of an organization determined to put an end to literature. In Anticonferences (1983), he managed to unite the essay and the narrative. Member of the Argentine Academy of Letters and corresponding member of the Royal Spanish Academy, Blaisten received, among many other distinctions, the Honor Belt of the Argentine Society of Writers (SADE), the Platinum Konex Award and the Annual Lifetime Achievement Award. Artistic of the National Endowment for the Arts. He passed away in 2004. Adapted from Biografรญas.com
Imagino nuestro afecto mutuo naciรณ porque รฉramos dos muchachos de barrio, con cรณdigos similares. Una vez me contรณ que, cuando por alguna razรณn debรญa alejarse de sus calles amadas, al volver e ir recorriendo esas veredas conocidas los vecinos, a su paso, lo aplaudรญan. Ya entonces se distinguรญa su humor รกcido e irรณnico, su caballerosidad pueblerina, su ternura de hermano menor criado por sus cinco hermanas, caracterรญsticas que reflejarรญa la prosa atrayente y precisa de sus relatos y poesรญas. – Ricardo Feierstein, Novelista, poeta, escritor
______________________________________
I imagine that our mutual affection was born because we were two boys from the neighborhood, with similar values. Once he told me that, when, for some reason he had to get away from his beloved streets, when he returned and walked those familiar paths, the neighbors, as he passed, applauded him. Already then his acid and ironic humor was distinguished, his small-town chivalry, the tenderness of his younger brother raised by his five sisters, characteristics that would reflect the attractive and precise prose of his stories and poetry. Ricardo Feierstein, novelist, poet, writer
___________________________________________
___________________________________________
Cuentos raros/Unusual Short Short-Stories
El humor negro de Isidoro Blaisten/The Black Humor of Isidoro Blaisten
______________________________
ADONAI
Adonai iba por el mundo vendiendo las tablas de la
ley.
Las llevaba sobre el hombro y pregonaba:
–A diรฉ la tabla de la ley, a diรฉ
Nunca nadie le comprรณ nada.
Pero cuando muriรณ, un carpintero que tambiรฉn
era hebreo escribiรณ su nombre como escriben los he-
breos, de derecha a izquierda. Nunca nadie alcanzรณ
a entender que querรญa decir esa palabra escrita sobre
la losa con el lรกpiz del carpintero: IANODA.
Pero eso si: nadie se animรณ a borrarla. Ni si-
quiera la lluvia.
_______________________________
ADONAI
Adonai went out in the world selling the tablets of the
Law.
He carried them on his shoulder and proclaimed:
–For sale, the tablet of the law, for sale.
Nobody ever bought anything from him;
But when he died, a carpenter who was also
A Hebrew wrote his name as the Hebrews wri-
te, from the right to the left. Nobody ever managed
to understand the meaning of that word written over
the slab with the carpenterโs pencil: IANODA.
But this much is true: nobody had the courage to
erase it. Not e-
ven the rain.
__________________
EL BRINDIS
–Seรฑores, es realmente lindo. Tambiรฉn sรฉ que es emotivo. Sรญ, amigos,
quiero decirles que sรญ, que hoy yo puedo decirles a ustedes: sรญ, ami-
gos, he crecido. He crecido por quรฉ. Porque me sie-
nto realizado, porque realmente he comenzado a latir
con mi propio pulso, o sea, que, es decir, he tomado
conciencia, esto es, he tomado conciencia, he concien-
tizado Me asumรญ. ยฟVieron? He concientizado las po-
tencias yoicas. Viste? Asumir la realidad, amigos.
Tal cual. Lo que corresponde. Se terminรณ para mรญ
el abismo generacional, la confusiรณn, el estar mal ins-
talado en la vida. Por eso, amigos, mis queri-
dos amigos, levanto mi copa, al cumplir ochenta
y tres aรฑos.
____________________
THE TOAST
โGentlemen, itโs really nice. I also know that it is moving. Yes, friends,
I want to tell say that yes, that today I can tell all of you: yes, frie-
nds, I have grown. I have grown, why? Because I fe-
el fulfilled, because really I have begun to beat with my own pulse,
or rather, that is, that, that is to say, I have become aware, thatโs it, I ha-
ve raised awareness. I have come to terms with myself. Do you see? I
have become aware of the potential of the ego. Do you see.
To come to terms with reality, friends. As it is. What is fitting. The generat-
ional abysm, the confusion, the malaise installed in life has end-
ed for me. Por that reason, my dear friends,
I raise my cup on turning eighty-three.
____________________
EL MAGO
–Nada por aquรญ, nada por allรก. . . ยกPero quiรฉn fue
el degenerado que me lo cambiรณ de lugar.
__________________
THE MAGICIAN
โNothing here, nothing there. . .But who was
the degenerate who moved it on me!
__________________
El EQUILIBRISTA
Lo que nunca alcanzรณ oรญr el equilibrista, antes de
ponerse a caminar sobre la cuerda floja, fue que en
el poste de la otra punta un peรณn del circo le dijo
al payaso.
–Pa mรญ que esta soga ya no da mรกs.
___________________
THE TIGHTROPE WALKER
What the tightrope walker was never able to hear, before
setting out to walk on the slack rope was that at
the post at the other end, a circus worker said to
the clown.
โIn my opinion, that rope is worn out.”
_________________________
EL DESARROLLO Y LA FE
Sรณlo los chicos creen. Pero los chicos creen.
_____________________________
DEVELOPMENT AND FAITH
Only the children believe. But the children believe.
_____________________________
MAGNITUDES Y DISTANCIAS
El mundo es ancho y ajeno. La cama es angosta y
nuestra. La cama estรก aquรญ no mรกs.
__________________________
MAGNITUDES AND DISTANCES
The world is wide and foreign. The bed is narrow and
ours. The bed is right here.
____________________________
LOS PIES EN LA TIERRA
รl: ยฟCรณmo estรก el dรญa? ยฟDe maravillas, despunta brumoso, hay melancolรญa. Reverbera? ยฟCรณmo estรก el dรญa, che?
Ella: Todavรญa no amaneciรณ.
__________________________
FEET ON THE GROUND
He: โHowโs the day? Is it of miracles, blunted by fog, is there melancholy, does it reverberate?โ
She: Itโs not dawn yet.
_________________________________
EL TIEMPO
El tiempo no tenรญa tiempo. Corria apuradรญ-
simo.
–ยกCaramba! โmeditaba–. Voy a llegar tarde a oficina
otra vez, ยฟQuรฉ va a ser de mรญ, quรฉ va a
ser de la clepsidra, que va a ser de del nono Chrono, si
me echan? Asรญ razonaba el tiempo colgado al colec-
tivo sesenta.
Pero he aquรญ que una diminuta anciana, con cara
de vieja marihuanera que asomaba su rostro mar-
chito por la ventanilla, dรญjole desde el primer asiento:
–Tiempo al tiempo, hijo mรญo. No por mucho ma-
drugar se amanece mรกs temprano. Mรญrame a mรญ, pe-
queรฑo. Cuando era una mozuela dicharachera y feliz,
en los aรฑos twenty, en Mรฉxico, cantaba las maรฑani-
tas y hoy sรณlo una pobre mendiga harapienta.
–ยกPor favor, seรฑora! โle dijo el tiempo–. Vie-
jos son los trapos. Usted habrรก tenido sus buenos fa-
tos. Si se le nota en la cara de picarona.
–Bueno, modestรญas aparte, hubo un gondolero
veneciano que me quiso poner un bulรญn.
–ยฟEl de la calle Ayacucho?
–ยกCรกllese, loco! โ contestรณ la viejita sacando la
mano por la ventanilla y palmeรกndole el glรบteo pos-
terior izquierdo.
El tiempo se asustรณ. Con la mente obnubilada cre-
yรณ que venรญa el peligro amarillo y se desprendiรณ de
la manija. Lo juntaron con una cucharita. Una cuchari-
ta marca Gamuza que la pobre viejecilla llevaba en
el bolsรณn.
Se detuvieron todos los relojes. Varios refranes
dejaron de existir: โEl tiempo es oroโ. โTodo tiempo
pasado fue mejorโ, El tiempo es como el viento,
apaga los fuegos dรฉbiles y aviva los fuertes.
De la Biblia se eliminรณ Eclesiastรฉs, en la parte
que dice: โHay un tiempo para todoโ.
Clausuraron el diario El Tiempo.
Por eso no hay cosa mejor, en los dรญas de estรญo,
cuando aprieta la canรญcula y sopla el siroco sobre las
altas torres, que matar a todas las viejitas marahua-
neras, haciรฉndoles tragar una cucharita marca Ga-
muza.
______________________________
TIME
Time didnโt have time. He was running hast-
ly.
โCaramba,โ he thought. โI am going to arrive late
at the office again. Whatโs happen to me, whatโs going to
be of the hourglass, whatโs going to happen to the nerd Chrono, if
they fire me? So thought time, hanging on to the bus, nu-
mber 60.
But here is a diminutive old lady with the face of
an old marijuana smoker who showed her wizened face thr-
ough the little window. She said to him from the first seat:
โTake your time, my son. Getting up early doesnโt make
the dawn come sooner. Look at me, little one. When I was happy
and talkative girl, in the twenties. In Mexico, I sang in the morning,
and today I am a poor beggar in rags.
โPlease, Seรฑora!โ time said to her. The rags are old. You must have
had your good times. It shows in your roguish face.โ
โWell, without modesty, there was a Venetian gondolier who
wanted set me up in a place.โ
โOn Ayacucho Street?โ
โShut up, asshole!โ answered the little old lady, pushing her hand out through the little window and patting him on his left, rear gl
-uteus.
Time was startled. With his mind confused, he believed
that the yellow peril was coming and he let go of the handle. They put him
together in a spoon. A Gamuza brand spoon that the poor little
old lady carried in her satchel.
All watches and clocks stopped. Several adages ceased to exist:
โTime is money.โ โAll times past were better,โ โTime is like the wind,
it puts out weak fires and strengthens the strong ones.โ
From the Bible, part of Ecclesiastes was eliminated, the part that says:
โThere is a time for everything.โ
The shut down the The Times newspaper.
For that reason, there is nothing better, in the summer days,
when the dog days are uncomfortable and the sirocco blows
over the high towers, than to kill all the little old marijuana smokers
making them swallow a Gamuza brand spoon.
______________________________________
EL ASCETA MENDICANTE
Ya soy asceta mendicante. Me dejรฉ la barba y voy
por las casas solucionando problemas.
Toco los timbres, golpeo los nudillos, doy alda-
bonazos, y alguna que otra, segรบn las puertas,
la infraestructura y la condiciรณn social. Mi tarifa es
dispar y depende de los problemas del epifenรณmeno.
Tengo un precio para todo. Pero decรญa Napo-
Leรณn, โtodo hombre tiene su estipendioโ. Yo tengo
el mรญo. O sea es, esto es:
Complejos de Edipo no clarificados: un sobre de
sopa Royco o una cajita de cuatro caldos en cubo,
amรฉn de cinco patys (por consulta).
Tendencias homosexuales (para varones y mujer-
es): 2 pollos (muertos).
Complejo de abandรณnico: una caja de postre Exqui-
sita, amรฉn de un paquete de yerba Taragรผi (que
es la mejor), o en su defecto dos de Polenta Mรกgica.
Y asรญ sucesivamente, timbrazo por aquรญ, aldabo-
nazo por allรก, golpeteo por acullรก, recorro com alto
espรญritu las unidades de vivienda.
A veces, cuando en nรบcleo habitacional no hay
aldabones, ni timbres, ni superficie alguna sobre la
cual golpetear, pongo las manos al costado de mi bo-
ca a guisa de altoparlante, megafone, baffle o reper-
cutor y grito:
–ยกEeeech, de la casa!. . .
No sรฉ quรฉ ven en mi cara. Pero todas las seรฑoras
me hacen pasar.
โDites moisโ, le digo en francรฉs. o โTell meโ, en
inglรฉs, โtu trauma, por favorโ.
Barrunto que algo en mรญ, algo que tengo yo
las seรฑoras tambiรฉn lo barruntan. Y si no lo ba-
rruntan, extiendo los dedos de sendas manos como
sarmientos secos o plegarias petrificadas. No en un
gesto de ruego o imploraciรณn, no. Sucede que me ven
como la conciencia de su propio mensaje de bruja,
su necio destino. La vida que se va y los complejos
que quedan. Entonces confรญan en mรญ.
Sรฉ que pasarรกn mucho mรกs de treinta aรฑos hasta que yo sea comprendido.
Pero las seรฑoras saben. ยกCaray, si saben!
Y yo seguirรฉ peregrinado. Pasarรฉ junto a los
cercos y a los abetos, junto a las explanadas y gra-
derรญas, junto las setas y las empalizadas, pregun-
tando, inquiriendo junto a cada rostro socavado por
la desdicha: ยฟse siente usted realizada?
Ahora, aquรญ, cabe el recuerdo para la primera se-
รฑora que rescatรฉ.
Fue en las postrimerรญas de un octubre somno-
liento. Por entonces los รกlamos eran jรณvenes y las
torcazas iniciaban su vuelo equinoccial.
Preguntada si se sentรญa realizada, respondiรณ que:
no. La paciente presentaba su cuadro manรญaco-de-
presivo con sรญntomas de angustia.
Casada, dos hijos, 14 y 10, el nivel socioeconรณmico era de alta
clase media y su marido realizaba frecuentes viajes al interior.
Se comenzรณ la terapia un mes despuรฉs, un desesperado
noviembre. Se fijaron los horarios en dos frascos de zapallos en almรญbar.
De acuerdo, dijo ella, pase.
Hoy en dรญa la seรฑora (la denominaremos N.N.)
se siente realizada, ha suspendido las prรกcticas de la
masturbaciรณn y su รกnimo, ayer contrito, ha movibili-
zado sus defensas y se nota mayor preocupaciรณn por
los problemas societarios.
Una luz nueva habita en su alma como una golon-
drina para siempre.
Y en mi alacena, de su duelo tal vez olvidada, se
divisan las torres de cristal de los altos frascos, de
los altos zapallos, de los altos almรญbares.
_________________________________
THE ASCETIC MENDICANT
I am an ascetic mendicant. I let my beard grow and I go to house, solving problems.
I push door bells, I hit the small knobs, I make loud kno-
ks, and once in a while, according to the type of door, the infrastructure
and the social level. My fee is inconsistent and depends upon the problems of the epiphenomenon.
I have a price for everything. But said Napo-
leon said, โEvery man has his price.โ I have mine. Or in other words, this is it:
Unresolved Oedipus complex: a packet of Royco soup or a
small box of four dried soups in cubes, as well as five crackers (for each consultation).
Homosexual tendencies (for men and women): two chickens (dead).
Abandonment complex: a box of Exquista dess-
ert, and also a packet of Taragรผi mate
(which is the best) or lacking that, two of Polenta Mรกgica.
And, so, successively, a loud doorbell here, hard knocking there, banging
over there, I go around in high spirits the units of the building. At times, when in
the habitational nucleus, there are no door-knockers or doorbells
or any outside area on which to pound, I put my hands around my mouth
as a sort of loudspeaker, megaphone or baffle or repeater and I shout:
โEeech, you at home!. . .
I donโt know what they see in my face. But all the seรฑoras let me in.
โDites moisโ, I say to her in French. o โTell me.โ in English,
Your trauma, please.โ
I sense that something in me, something that I have, the seรฑoras also sense.
And if they donโt sense it, I extend my fingers from straightened hands like
dry shoots or petrified prayers. Not in a gesture of begging or imploring, no.
It happens that the see me as the conscience of their own message
of witchcraft, their stupid destiny. Live goes on and the complexes stay,
Then, they trust me.
I know that many more than thirty years will pass until I am understood.
But the seรฑoras know. My God, they know!
And I will continue proclaiming. I will pa-
ss near the fences and the fir trees, near the esplanades and stands and
fences, asking, inquiring near each face, digging for the misfortune: โdo you feel yourself
to be fulfilled?
Now, here, brings back the memory of the first seรฑora that I rescued.
It was in the last days of a sleepy October. In those days,
the poplars were young and large doves we-
re beginning their equinoctial flight.
Asked if she felt fulfilled, she responded: no. The patient presented
manic-depressive case with symptoms of anxiety.
Married, two children, 14 and 10, her socioeconomic level was upper
middle class and her husband made frequent trips to the interior of the country.
Her therapy began a month later, a desperate November.
We set the schedule in return for two jars of squash in syrup. Okay, she said, come in.
These days the seรฑora (letโs call her N.N.) feels fulfilled. She has stopped her
practice of masturbation, and here spirit, before contrite, ha-
s mobilized her defenses and new she shows more interest in societal problems.
A new light inhabits her soul as if it were a perpet-
ual dove.
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย And in my cupboard, her grief perhaps forgotten, one sees the towers of crystal of the tall jars, of the tall squash, of the tall syrups.
Como ese golpe que corta la prosa en pedacitos, muriรณ Tamara y ninguna palabra podrรก conjurar esta tristeza infinita. Silvina Freira, Pรกgina 12
Like that blow that cuts prose into little pieces, Tamara died and no words can conjure up this infinite sadness. Silvina Freira, Pรกgina 12
______________________
Tamara Kamenszain naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1947. Editรณ la revista independiente revista, 2001 antes de convertirse en editor de las pรกginas culturales de los diarios La Opiniรณn y Clarรญn. En 1972 Kamenszain recibiรณ el premio de poesรญa de la National Fondo de las Artes de Argentina por De este lado del Mediterrรกneo, su primer libro de poemas, publicado en Buenos Aires en 1973. Kamenszain ha sido profesor en la Universidad de Buenos Aires y la Universidad de Mรฉxico y trabajรณ para el Instituto Nacional Fondo de las Artes de Mรฉxico y Secretarรญa de Cultura de Argentina. Autora prolรญfica, entre sus muchas obras se encuentran El texto silencioso, Tradiciรณn y vanguardia en la poesรญa sudamericana,La casa grande, Vida de living, La edad de la poesรญa,Tango bar, El Ghetto y Solos y solas. Kamenszain ha sido galardonado con un varios premios, como la Beca John Simon Guggenheim y la Medalla Presidencial Pablo Neruda, entre otros.
Tamara Kamenszain was born in Buenos Aires in 1947. She edited the independent magazine, 2001 before becoming editor of the cultural pages of the newspapers La Opinion and Clarin. In 1972 Kamenszain received the poetry prize of the National Arts Fund of Argentina for From this Side of the Mediterranean, her first book of poems, published in Buenos Aires in 1973. Kamenszain has taught at the University of Buenos Aires and the University of Mexico and worked for the National Endowment for the Arts in Mexico and the Ministry of Culture in Argentina. A prolific author, among her many works are El texto silencioso, Tradiciรณn y vanguardia en la poesรญa sudamericana, La casa grande , Vida de living, La edad de la poesรญa, Tango bar,El Ghetto and Solos y solas. Kamenszain has been awarded a number of prizes, such as the John Simon Guggenheim Fellowship, and the Pablo Neruda Presidential Medal, among others. She died in 2021.
ELIAHU
Cuando dijiste el Shmรก Israel que cada vez quiso decir
otra cosa esperamos muchos minutos y รฉl no llegaba, รฉl que
no era nada (o bien era etรฉreo) pero hacรญa ruido
y no se tomaba la copa del medio de la mesa, รฉl que te secaba
las manos que aรฑo por medio me tocaba lavarte, la palangana
preparada, terror a volcar el agua, risas contenidas
cuando las bendiciones eran cada vez mรกs agudas, y
mirando la copa que no se vacรญa. Y sin embargo, parecรญa
vaciarse hasta imaginar que el se emborracharรญa un poco
en cada casa, tomando de cada copa alta, รบnica, brillante
en el centro de cada mesa. Millones de copas รบnicas esperando
en millones de mesas festivas y รฉl entrรณ sin ser
visto cuando se abrieron las puertas que se cerraron detrรกs.
Yo que estuve controlando sus pasos. Nuevamente
Este aรฑo escuchamos el cuento del pan que es siempre otro cuento,
y de nuevo preguntamos las cuatro preguntas espiando
las pequeรฑas letras hebreas que de olor de a baรบl, de olor
a viaje desde Rusia, a las barbas del bisabuelo Akiva que
espiรณ la ceremonia desde el marco ovalado con su sombrero redondo.
Nadie supo nunca que las รบltimas canciones de la noche
eran las que รฉl habรญa inventado cuando se sentaba inclinรกndose
a reclinar el shabat en la silla alta que guardaste hasta que
hijo por hijo se fueran yendo de la casa con corredor,
con terraza, con biblioteca de puertas de vidrio, con anchas
biblias olorosas, con los vestidos del casamiento en Brasil
cuando bajaron con nauseas del barco despuรฉs siguiรณ
y llegรณ a Buenos Aires. Dos noches seguidas se repite la
ceremonia, en Europa se repite tres noches, algunas sectas
la hacen una sola vez pero cantan mรกs alto, tambiรฉn
bailan. Nosotros a veces levantamos los brazos hacia el
cielo cantando alto y eso es tan importante como decir
el Shmรก Israel siete veces antes de dormir, para adentro, nunca
en voz alta. Vergรผenza de la propia voz diciendo Shmรก
Israel. Sabiendo desde siempre que aunque se pensara
serรญa escuchado, porque รฉl escucha todos los hermosos pensamientos
y contesta en los pensamientos mismos como nadie puede hacerlo.
Nadie mรกs que Adonai o Eliahu Hanavi que toma la copa alta, te secรณ
las manos que este aรฑo me tocรณ lavarte, y sin hacer ruido, cruzรณ por la
ventana abierta y entrรณ por la puerta abierta de cualquier casa donde la
copa de vino lo esperaba en el centro de la mesa.
_______________________
ELIAHU
When you said the Shema Yisroel that meant something different
each time we waited a long time and he did not arrive, the one who
was nothing (or rather ethereal), but made noise and drank the
glass of wine from the middle of the table, he who dried your hands
that every other year it was my duty to wash, the wash-basin prepared,
fear of spilling the water, laughter contained when each time the
blessings became sharper, and I kept watching the cup that did not
empty. And nevertheless, it seemed to empty itself until I imagined that he would get a little drunk in each house, drinking from each
tall glass, unique, brilliant in the center of each table. Millions of
different glasses waiting on millions of festive tables and the one who
entered without being seen when they opened the doors that
were closed behind him. I was the one controlling his steps. Again this year we heard the story of the matzo that is always another story, and again we asked the four questions scrutinizing the small Hebrew letters that smelled like a trunk, like a journey from Russia, like the whiskers of great-grandfather Akiva wearing his round hat who contemplated the ceremony from the oval picture frame.
No one ever knew if the final songs of the night were the ones
he invented when he sat down, reclining, to welcome the
Sabbath int the tall chair you saved until one of the children
began going from the house with a hallway, with a terrace, with a
library with glass doors, and thick and odorous Bibles, with the
garments from the wedding in Brazil, when they disembarked seasick
from the ship that afterwards continued on until it reached Buenos
Aires. The ceremony is repeated on two consecutive nights, in
Europe, it is repeated three nights, some sects do it a single time but
but they sang louder, they dance too. We sometimes raise our arms up
to heaven singing loudly and that is so important as saying the
Shema Yisrael seven times before sleeping, to yourself, never out
loud. Ashamed by hearing your own voice saying Shema Yisroel.
always knowing that if you only thought it, it would be heard,
because he hears all the beautiful thoughts and the answers in the same
thoughts the way no one else can.
No one other than Adonai or Eliahu Hanavi who drank from the tall
glass, dried your hands this year that it was my turn to wash, and
without noise passed through the open window and entered
the door of any house where the glass of wine awaited him in
in the center of the table.
______________________________________________
RETORNO II
Desde que se pegรณ el otoรฑo a las calles hรบmedas de esta
ciudad reconocible a travรฉs de los tangos no puedo mรกs
que caminar con los brazos pegados al pecho tratando de
ubicarme en el dรญa exacto de mi nacimiento porque desde
hoy sรฉ que bendijeron mi nombre con un rezo tomaban
vino dulce en copitas y comรญan pescado frito para
acostumbrar su alma a la presencia de una nueva alma
que entonces no era mรกs que un punto entre รกrboles, un
soplo ente sรณlidos alientos, un gesto entre risas
perfectamente nรญtidos.
Desde que se pegรณ el otoรฑo a las calles hรบmedas de esta
reconocible a travรฉs de los tangos, vuelvo a preguntarme
por las primeras alegrรญas por las imรกgenes que
llenaron una pupila no acostumbrada a la luz por
los primeros contactos con la lengua con la solidez del mundo.
Vuelvo a preguntarme si el sentido de todo lo que mรกgicamente
que existe veintiรบn aรฑos desenvolviรฉndose
con la naturalidad que se pela una naranja y entiendo
que cuando mรกs se quiera saber menos se sabra porque
estรกn cerrados los caminos que descienden del รกrbol a la raรญz.
De esta tristeza de no ser mรกs la que sentรกndose en las
De un abuela escuchaba la historia de la moabita
Ruth con esta alegrรญa de encontrar en cada objeto un indicio
de esta historia, el asombro de saber que la poesรญa
no hace mรกs que continuarla porque es a la luz la madre
y la hija de la moabita Ruth.
Es la gran madre cuyo vientre se genera el complicado
tejido de palabras, es la hija que surge de este vientre
para reposar a la intemperie de la imaginaciรณn en el
esclavizado y libre campo de recuerdo.
Mi abuelo decรญa que mientras Ruth peregrinaba por los
caminos de la tierra santa sus ojosโ0fijos en el cieloโ
vaticinaban las lluvias, dialogaban con los vientos y abrรญan
el espacio para que aparezcan las nubes.
Toda historia abre un espacio en el que podemos acomodar
nuestros cuerpos haciendo la plancha sobre un mundo
de personajes cuyos correrรญas dependen del destino
azarosa de las palabras. Sin la historia del abuelo no hay
Ruth pero sin Ruth no hay lluvias ni diรกlogos con los vientos
ni polvorientos caminos de Moab por los que se bambolean
camellos cargados de telas, de especias orientales,
de pรกlidos niรฑos que serรกn vendidos como esclavos y verรกn
su vida como una monรณtona estela arrastrรกndose detrรกs
de los remos que deben remar.
________________________________
RETURN II
Since autumn attached itself to the humid streets of this city
recognizable because of the tangos I can only stroll with my arms stuck
to my chest, trying to place myself on the exact day of my
birth because from now on I know that those who blessed my name
with a prayer drank sweet wine in shot glasses and ate fried fish
to accustom their souls to the presence of a new soul that was
then no more than a speck among trees, a puff among strong breath.
Since autumn attached itself to the humid streets of this city
recognizable because of the tango, I ask myself again about the
earliest joys about the images that filled a pupil still not
accustomed to the light about the first contact of the tongue
with the solidness of the world. I ask myself again about
the meaning of all that magically existed twenty-five years ago
developing itself with the naturalness with which one peals an
orange and I understand that the more you want to know the less
you will know because the paths that descend from the tree to the
root are closed.
In the sadness of no longer being the one who sits on her
grandfatherโs knee listening to the story of Ruth the Moabite is
joy of finding a trace of the story in every object, the
astonishment of knowing that poetry only continues it because it is
at one and the same time the mother and daughter of Ruth the
Moabite.
She is the great mother in whose womb the complicated
weaving of words is generated. She is the daughter who emerges
from that womb to rest in the openness of the imagination, in the
enslaved and free field of memory.
My grandfather used to say that while Ruth wandered
through the paths of the Holy Land her eyesโfixed on heavenโ
prophesied the rains, dialogued with the winds and opened the
necessary space so the clouds would appear.
Every story opens a space where we can accommodate our
our bodies and lose ourselves in a world of characters whose wanderings
depend on the hazardous destiny of words. Without grandfatherโs
story then there is no Ruth but without Ruth there is no rain or dialogue
with the winds or the dusty roads of Moab where camels sway
loaded down with fabrics, with oriental spices, with pale children
who will be sold as slaves and who will see then lives as a
monotonous wake dragged behind the oars that they must push.
Translations from the Spanish by Roberta Gordenstern
Marcos Ricardo Barnatรกn es un escritor argentino nacido en Buenos Aires en 1946, en el seno de una familia sefardita de origen hispano-sirio. Realizรณ sus primeros estudios y cursรณ Filosofรญa y Letras en su ciudad natal. En 1965 fijรณ su residencia en Madrid, aunque realiza frecuentes viajes a Argentina, Francia e Israel. Colabora habitualmente, en calidad de crรญtico literario, en las principales revistas espaรฑolas e hispanoamericanas. En 1971 publicรณ su primera novela, El laberinto de Sion, a la que siguieron Gor (1973), Diano (1982), y Con la frente marchita (1989). Sus narraciones completas integran La Repรบblica de Mรณnaco (Seix Barral, 2000).En 2005 publicรณ en Editorial Alhulia Dos mil y una noches a modo de diario. Su poesรญa, que comparte los planteamientos de los novรญsimos y en la que las referencias a la cรกbala y a la cultura judรญa son una constante, resulta un personal hallazgo donde se entrecruzan la tradiciรณn castellana y las literaturas europeas en sus tendencias mรกs cosmopolitas. Su obra poรฉtica se halla reunida en El orรกculo invocado (1984), El techo del templo (1999) y Consulado general (2000)Entre sus ensayos destacan La Kรกbala (1974) y Borges, biografรญa total (1996).
Marcos Ricardo Barnatรกn is an Argentine writer born in Buenos Aires in 1946, into a Sephardic family of Spanish-Syrian origin. He made his first studies and studied Philosophy and Letters in his hometown. In 1965 he settled in Madrid, although he made frequent trips to Argentina, France and Israel. He regularly collaborates, as a literary critic, in the main Spanish and Latin American magazines. In 1971 he published his first novel, El laberinto de Sion, which was followed by Gor (1973), Diano (1982), and With the Withered Forehead (1989). His complete narratives make up La Repรบblica de Monaco (Seix Barral, 2000). In 2005 he published in Editorial Alhulia Two thousand and One Nights as a newspaper. His poetry, which shares the approaches of the newest and in which references to the Kabbalah and Jewish culture are a constant, is a personal find where the Castilian tradition and European literatures intersect in their most cosmopolitan tendencies. His poetic work is found together in The Invoked Oracle (1984), The temple Ceiling (1999) and General Consulate (2000). His essays include La Kรกbala (1974) and Borges, Biography Total (1996).
Me despertaba agitado, siempre envuelto en un pesadilla engorrosa donde todo era trรกgico. No era felicidad. La casa a oscuras y silenciosa parecรญa un gran ataรบd con su vรญctima luchando, absurdamente, por vivir. Desde mi cama y sin levantar la cabeza podรญa ver la ventana entreabierta, escondida tras los visillos y protegida por la persiana gris que ahuyentaba mis recelos, nadie podรญa entrar. Si estiraba el brazo era posible palpar el cable de la luz y su perilla, sentir la seguridad de que estaba en mis manos encender el velador, destrozar a las fantasรญas de la ambigรผedad. Mรกs allรก el vaso de agua que mamรก dejaba siempre a mi alcance para aliviar cualquier imprevisto ataque de tos. El reloj con sus luminiscentes agujas brillando a la mesilla, y el libro de historia adivinado en la pรกgina de la รบltima lecciรณn. Una cortina ocultando al asesinos de Julio Cรฉsar.
— Anoche, mientras comรญamos, iba a contarlo cuando algo me detuvo, sentรญ de pronto vergรผenza y callรฉ
Para entrever la puerta era necesario volverme y incorporarme sobre la cama un poco, entonces debรญa concentrar mi vista sobre ella para lentamente se dibujase el marco y mรกs tarde la sombra del picaporte. Muchas veces despuรฉs de un corto desvelo volvรญa dormirme y no despertaba hasta que golpeaban anunciรกndome que era hora de ir al colegio, pero otras veces, permanecรญa despierto acostumbrรกndome a la luz, velador oscuridad y a aquel nuevo universo espectral con sus planetas, camas espectral con sus planetas, , vaso de cama, ventana, visillo, persiana, cable de luz, perilla, velador, vaso de agua, reloj, mesilla, libro de historia y puerta. ยกCuรกnta valentรญa era necesario para vencer mi horror! Cuando la claridad se filtraba en la habitaciรณn comenzaba a vestirme y al sonar de las golpes para salir a llevarme.
–โยกUstedes lo mataron! Yo lo sรฉ, todos ustedes. . .โ
Si la noche se alargaba demasiado y las visiones turbaban mi descanso, las mantas hacรญa de fiel coraza y escudo para mi temor, temblando y sudando trataba de ocultarme entre ellos, de desaparecer para siempre bajo aquel, mullido cobijo. Olvidaba entonces todo mi poder, atemorizado por mis ensueรฑos no reparaba en el cable en el cable de la luz ni en la perilla, no atinaba a estirar a estirar el brazo y encender, por el contrario me alejaba de la mesilla, internรกndome hacia la pared, acurrando y sollozante como un nรกufrago que rema desesperadamente hacia alta mar en ingenua bรบsqueda de la salvaciรณn.
–โยกUstedes lo mataron! Yo lo sรฉ, todos ustedes. . .โ
–Papรก habรญa comido sin hablarnos, inquieto repitiรณ la bendiciรณn del pan tan maquinalmente que no me di cuenta de ella. Mamรก me miraba con cierta extraรฑeza, como se hubiera descubierto en mรญ algo insospechado, una cosa que le preocupaba mรกs que mi tos o mis multiplicaciones. Tenรญa deseos de hablar, de decirles todo, pero ese silencio y esa mirada me intimidaron, No, no lo dirรฉ, es mejor que no diga nada. No puede ser verdad. ยกNo es verdad!
Mucho despuรฉs cuando el abuelo me llevรณ por primera vez a casa de Rabbi Khaen, pude explicarme todo el temor, aquel enloquecido miedo nocturno que nadie conocรญa y que yo guardaba en el mรกs impenetrable de los secretos. Fue entonces que comprendรญ el significado de aquellas visiones perturbadores. Rabbi Khaen me brindรณ con gran generosidad el arma mรกs eficiente para combatirlas. Sรณlo serรญa necesario que mis labios infantiles pronunciaran el verbo primigenio, recitando la Shemรก, una calma celestial me colmaba, la seguridad. Los malos espรญritus abandonaron mi cuerpo, y otra vez la paz, la certidumbre del cable de la luz y el perilla, el velador, el vaso de agua simbolizando la custodia materna, el reloj con sus luminiscentes agujas brillando en la mesilla, y el libro de historia adivinado con la pรกgina de la รบltima lecciรณn. Una cortina ocultando al asesino de Julio Cรฉsar. Sรณlo seis palabras repetidas con entusiasmo intenso hacรญan el milagro, seis palabras de fe, seis palabras de gloria, seis palabras tambiรฉn de propiedad, de exclusividad, de orgullo. Ya no necesitaba de la luz. Su presencia iluminaba la noche.
–Enrique me habรญa visto llorar de rabia en un rincรณn de la clase, mientras los compaรฑeros gritaban en el patio sus รบltimos minutos de recreo. Lo vi entrar exaltado y a la vez comprensivo, queriendo consolar con un gesto todo mi dolor. . .
—Dรฉjalos, no saben lo que dicen. . .โ
–No podรญa ser verdad, nosotros no habรญan matado a nadie, ni mi padre, ni mi madre, ni mis abuelos. Nunca habรญa visto a nadie que hubiera matado. . .En el solitario delirio de mi dolor comencรฉ a odiar a ese desconocido del que nunca habรญa oรญdo hablar. La causa de mi llanto.
–โFueron los romanosโdijo mi primo–, te digo que fueron los romanos, me lo contรณ papรก, los soldados de Roma lo crucificaron. . .โ
Ya no necesitaba de la luz, la Shemรก era suficiente para iluminar y sobrevivir en las tempestades. Aprendรญ tambiรฉn a besar el mesusรก antes de salir de la casa, y mi abuelo me prometiรณ llevarme al tiempo los dรญas de fiesta grande, De la inseguridad desoladora de mi orfandad sรณlo quedaron restos, cortos escalofrรญos que no llegaban nunca a daรฑar los cimientos del mundo feliz que mi abuelo y el Rabbi Khaen me habรญan construido. Supe que era parte de un orden, de un Gran Orden que no habรญa nacido conmigo, sino que existรญa desde siempre y que serรญa eterno. El caos y la anarquรญa se habรญan borrado de mi espรญritu. รl y nosotros tenรญamos un pacto sellado en nuestra piel, una indestructible alianza a travรฉs de los tiempos. รramos Su Pueblo, y no nos abandonarรญa jamรกs. โNunca, nunca abandonarรฉ al pueblo mรญoโ. ยฟPor quรฉ temer entonces? ยฟQuรฉ mejor protecciรณn que la de รl? Era fundamental que venciese mi miedo.
La imagen de ese espeso cortinaje, extraรญdo de algรบn grabado antiguo por el autor de mi libro de historia, siempre se me aparecรญa antes de dormirme. El asesino entre sus pliegues llevaba un puรฑal en la mano preparado para herir a Julio Cรฉsar que, coronado hacรญa unos instantes, se acercaba a รฉl. Muchas veces creรญ adivinar su color granate, como el cortinado pesado que escoltaba el blanco encaje de Murano en la ventana del comedor, el puรฑal corto y brillante con mango de nรกcar, como un abrecartas que habรญa en el despacho de papรก. Una cortina ocultando al asesino de Julio Cรฉsar. Un perfume de rosas aterciopeladas en una habitaciรณn que abandonรฉ para siempre. Sรณlo seis palabras hacรญan el milagro. Tรญa Luna me habรญa mostrado aquel pesado libro que el abuelo guardaba con sumo cuidado en un armario del gran salรณn. Tenรญa cinco aรฑos, pero a pesar de los esfuerzos de mi padre aรบn, no concurrรญa a un colegio. Todos temรญan por mi salud delicada y preferรญan enseรฑarme en casa las primeras letras.
Mรกs tarde la opiniรณn paterna prevaleciรณ, pero entonces ya fue mucho mรกs duro abandonar a los seres queridos. Luna siempre hablaba de Parรญs, de sus juegos infantiles y de la Plaza Lafayette, o de aquel delicioso helado de todas que las maรฑanas del domingo tomaban los hermanos en โLa Boule de Neigeโ. Me resultaba difรญcil sostener el libro. Creo recordar sus gruesas pastas azules estampadas en oro. Tรญa Luna comprendรญa mi debilidad ayudรกndome sigilosamente para evitar en mรญ un vergonzoso sentimiento de impotencia. Era el gran libro del abuelo, en el que todos ponรญan los sumos cuidados, el libro que ocultaba ese secreto que daba luz al rostro de los que sufrรญan. Entonces era tan sรณlo un catรกlogo de letras desconocidas, pรกginas de extraรฑos signos contorsionados y extremadamente negras. Los miraba uno a uno, maravillado en aquel laberinto indescifrable pero sin embargo profundamente amado. Era un deslumbrada]o colegial ante lustrosas figuras multicolores de desconocidos paรญses, remotas latitudes de plenas de seguridad paradisรญaca. Algo me decรญa ya que era el Gran Libro, el mรญtico receptรกculo de todos los libros. Las grande capitulares estaban ornadas por complicadas filigranas, que yo seguรญa fiel en sus misteriosos caminos.
* * *
–โBueno te pongo una siesta. Pero maรฑana tenรฉs que leer mucho mejor para que mantenga la nota.“
Tรญa Luna decรญa que papรก era muy exigente y exageraba demasiado cuando yo me equivocaba en una palabra.
–Estos no son mรฉtodos para enseรฑarle al pobre chico–exclamaba con cierta magnificencia, dรกndole la frase un tono de grandeza que hacรญa sonreรญr a mamรก y enfurecรญa a papรก. Yo rechazaba los libros de cuentos que casi siempre me regalaran mis tรญas. Me aburrรญa mucho con aquellos cuadernos grandotes ilustrados con agresivos grabados que sรณlo decรญan tonterรญas. Preferรญa leer LA PRENSA o el VEA Y LEA, de mi abuela.
Mรกs tarde, iba a devorar todas las novelas que llenan los estanterรญas de la habitaciรณn de Luna, y las que mamรก resolvรญa comprarme despuรฉs de secretas consultaciones con el abuelo. Tรญa Luna no me dejaba nunca con el libro cuando lo sacaba del armario, permanecรญa hasta que sea la hora de volverlo a su sitio. Era una parsimoniosa ceremonia, un rito semejante a su sobriedad en los momentos previos a la comida del domingo en casa del abuelo, en la que cada miembro de la familia buscaba su lugar, mirรกndose todos con prudencia, devolviendo luego acompasadamiento sus servilletas a la espera de la bendiciรณn patriarcal.
–Tia, quiero leer el libro.
Ella dejaba, por un momento, de saborear su chocolate y vainilla en la โBoule de Niegeโ y me ayudaba a sostenerlo con generosa paciencia. Interrumpรญa el breve paseo hacia el Bulevar Magenta y se acercaba al armario en bรบsqueda de aquel paraรญso de papel y cartรณn donde comencรฉ a temer y a amar a lo desconocido.
El abuelo en su sillรณn bebรญa a sorbos pequeรฑos sorbos tu tasita de cafรฉ. Muchas tardes, me pedรญa que le leyese un trozo de Spinoza o algรบn poema de su Solomรณn Ibn Gabirol. La รบltima vez que le leรญa a Gabirol, me habรญa pedido โLa Canciรณn del Aguaโ. Le gustaba contarme sus sueรฑos o hablarme de su abuelo, hermano de un famoso rabino de Safed.
–Cuando mi abuelo me llevรณ a casa de su hermano, el rabbi, sentรญ miedo. Temรญa encontrarme allรญ con el olor asfixiante de las lรกmpara de aceite con aquel silencio tenebroso que yo adivinaba en la sinagoga.
Muchas noches, despuรฉs de cenar, nos quedรกbamos horas junto al cafรฉ y al agua de azahar.
–Las siete reglas de la interpretaciรณn que has aprendido son imprescindibles para comprender las sagradas y el espรญritu de la Ley. Has obedecido las palabras de Hillel, el anciano. โNo digas nunca estudiarรฉ cuando tenga tiempo, pues nunca lo tendrรกsโ.
A veces lo dejaba dormido en su sillรณn y abandonaba la casa pensando en la serenidad del sueรฑo, visiรณn en la que crecรญan de sombras de un estirpe docta y temeroso de Dios.
I woke up agitated, completely involved in an intricate dream where everything was tragic. It wasnโt happy. The dark and silent house seemed like a large coffin with its victim, fighting absurdly, to live. From my bed and without lifting my head I could see the half-opened window, hidden behind the lace curtains and protected by the gray Venetian blinds that drove away my fears, nobody could enter. If I stretched my arm it was possible to touch electric wire and its switch, feel the sureness that was in my hands to turn on the night light, destroy the fantasies of the ambiguity. Further away, the glass of water the mama always left at my reach to alleviate any unexpected coughing attack. The clock with its luminescent hands shined on the table, and the history book specifically on the page beginning the last lesson. A curtain hiding the assassins of Julius Cesar.
In order to take a glimpse though door, it was necessary for me to turn around and straighten up a little on the bed, then I had to concentrate my vision on it to slowly make out the frame and then the shadow of the door handle. Often after a short moment of sleeplessness I would fall asleep again and not wake up until they knocked, announcing the it was time to go to school, but on other occasions, I remained awake accustoming myself to the light, the lamp dark, and to a new spectral universe, spectral beds with their planets, glass of bed, window, lace curtains, Venetian blinds, electric wire, switch, glass of water, clock, bed table, history book and door. What courage was needed to overcome my horror! When the clarity filtered into the room, I began to get dressed and on hearing the knocks to get me up to leave.
You killed him! I know it, all of you. . .!โ
If the night stretched out too long and the visions upset my rest, the covers made a faithful breastplate and shield for my fear, trembling and sweating. I tried to hide myself among them, to disappear forever under that fluffy shelter. I then forgot all my strength, terrorized by my dreams, didnโt make use of the electric cable or the switch, didnโt succeed in reaching out my arm and turning it on, on the contrary, I moved away from the night able, going in toward the wall, moaning and sobbing like a shipwrecked man who rows desperately toward the open sea in an ingenuous search for salvation.
You killed him! I know it, all of you!
Papa had eaten without speaking, uneasy, he repeated the blessing over the bread so mechanically that I didnโt notice it. Mama looked at my in a certain strange way, as if she had discovered in me something unexpected in me, something that worried her more than my cough or my multiplication tables. I really wanted to speak, to tell them something, but that silence and that look intimidated me. No, no I wonโt tell them, itโs better that I donโt say anything. It canโt be true. Itโs not true!!
Much latter when my grandfather took me for the first time to Rabbi Khaenโs house, I was able to explain all the terror, all that crazed nocturnal fear nobody knew and that I kept in the most impenetrable of silences. It was then that I understood the meaning of those perturbing visions.
Rabbi Khaen, with great generosity, offered me the most efficient armament for combatting them. It would only be necessary that my childโs lips pronounce the primal words, reciting the Schma: a celestial calm filled me with security. The evil spirits abandoned my body, and once again, peace, the certainty of the electric wire and switch, the lamp, the glass of water, symbolizing maternal protection, the clock with its luminescent hands, shining on the night table and the history book set with the page from the last lesson. A curtain hiding the assassin of Julius Cesar. Only six words repeated with intense enthusiasm made the miracle, six words of glory, six words also of property, of exclusivity, of pride. I no longer needed the light. Its presence illuminated the night.
Enrique had seen me cry with anger in a corner of the classroom, while, the other boys yelled in the patio during the last minutes of break. I saw him enter, exalted and at the same time understanding, wishing to console all my suffering with a gesture.
Let them go, they donโt know what they are saying. . .โ
It canโt be true, we hadnโt killed anyone, not my father, not my mother, not my grandparents. I had never seen anyone who might have killed. . . In the solitary delirium of my pain, I began to hate this unknown ow whom I had never heard spoken. The cause of my crying.
โIt was the Romans, my cousin said, Iโm telling you that it was the Romans, Papa, the soldiers from Rome, crucified him . .โ
I no longer needed the light. The Shema was sufficient to illuminate and to survive in the storms. I learned also to kiss the Mesusa before leaving the house, and my grandfather promised to take me at the time of great holiday.
From the bleak insecurity of my orphanhood only remains were left, short shivers that didn’t ever damage the foundation of the happy world that my grandfather and Rabbi Khaen had constructed for me. I knew that I was part of an order, of a Great Order that had not been born with me, but that always existed and would be eternal. The chaos and the anarchy had been erased from my spirit. He and we had a pact in our skin, an indestructible alliance through the ages. We were His People, and he would never abandon us. โNever, never will I abandon my people.โ Why then fear? What better protection than His? It was certain that my fear would be defeated.
The image on that heavy cover, taken from some ancient print by the author of my history book, always appeared to me before I went to sleep. The assassin between the folds carried a dagger in his hand, preparing to wound Julius Cesar, who, crowned just a few instants before, approached him. Many times, I believed I could pick out his garnet color, like the heavy curtain that heard the white Murano lace in the dining room window, the short and brilliant dagger with a mother-of-pearl handle, like the letter opener that was in Papaโs office. A curtain hiding the assassin of Julius Cesar. A perfume of velveted roses in a room that I abandoned forever. Only six words made the miracle, Aunt Luna had shown me that heavy book that grandfather kept with great care in a living room closet. I was six-years-old, but even in spite of my efforts, I didnโt go to school. Everyone feared for my delicate health and preferred to teach me the first materials at home.
Later, my fatherโs opinion prevailed, put then it was far more difficult for me to leave my loved ones. Luna always spoke of Paris, of her childhood games and of the Plaza Lafayette. Or of that delicious ice cream every Sunday morning that all the children had at the โSnow Ball.โ It was difficult for me to hold the book. I believe I remember its thick blue covers stamped with gold. Aunt Luna understood my weakness slyly helping me avoid a shameful feeling of impotence. It was grandfatherโs huge book, into which everyone put their greatest cares, the book that hid this secret that gave birth to the face of those who suffered. The, it was only a catalogue of unknown letters, pages of strange signs, twisted and extremely black. They looked at each other, marveling in that indecipherable labyrinth, that nevertheless profoundly loved. It was a dazzling collection, with lustrous multi-color figures of unknown countries, remote latitudes full of paradisal security. Something told me then that it was the Great Book, the mythical receptacle of all books. The great capitulars were made ornate by complicated watermarks, that I followed loyal to its mysterious paths.
***
โOkay, Iโll give you a 7. But tomorrow you have to read a lot better so you can keep up your grades.โ
Aunt Luna said that papa was very demanding and exaggerated when I made a mistake on a word. โThese arenโt methods for teaching the poor boy,โ he would exclaim with a certain magnificence, giving the phrase a tone of grandeur that made mama laugh and infuriated papa. I rejected the storybooks that my aunts almost always gave me. They bored me a lot, with those over-sized notebooks illustrated with aggressive prints that only said nonsense. I preferred to read my grandmotherโs La Prensa or Vea y Lea.
Later on, I went on to devour all the novels that filled the shelves in Aunt Lunaโs room, and those that mama decided to buy for me after secret consultations with my grandfather. Aunt Luna never let me keep the book when I took it out of the closet, it stayed only until it was time to return it to its place. It was a parsimonious ceremony, a rite similar to sobriety in the moments previous toe the Sunday meal in grandfatherโs house, during which each member of the family sought his place, all looking at each other with prudence, later returning to adjusting their napkins, while waiting for the patriarchal.
โAunt, I want to read the book.โ
She stopped, for a moment to enjoy her chocolate and vanilla in the โBoule de Neigeโ and helped me hold it with generous patience. She interrupted the short walk toward the Magenta Boulevard and she went towards the closet in search of that paradise of paper and cardboard where I began to fear and love the unknown.
Grandfather in his large chair, drank in small sips from his small cup of coffee. Many afternoons, he asked me to read to him a piece of Spinoza or some poem by Solomon Ibn Gabirol. The last time that I read Gabirol to him, he had asked for the โSong of the Waterโ He liked to tell me his dreams or to tell me about his grandfather, brother of a famous rabbi from Safed. โWhen my grandfather took me to the house or his brother, the rabbi, I was afraid. I feared finding myself there with the asphyxiating odor of the oil lamp with that gloomy silence that I perceived in the synagogue.โ
Many nights, after dinner, we spent hours near the coffee and the orange water.
โThe seven rules of interpretation that you have learned are indispensable for understanding the sacred things and the spirit of the Law. You have obeyed the words of Hillel, the ancient one
Never say that I will study when I have time, but cause then you will never have it.โ
At time, I left him sleeping in his great chair, and I abandoned the house, thinking about the serenity of the dream, a vision from which grew from the shadows a wise and frightening way of God.
Armando Bublik fue oftalmรณlogo, escritor, ensayista y periodista radial. Autor de varias novelas, en 1993 ganรณ la Faja de Honor de la SADE por su novela Poncho y Talmud.
____________________
Armando Bublik was an opthamologist, writer, essayist and radio journalist. Author of various, he won the Sash of Honor of the SADE for his novel Poncho y Talmud.
Dormitaba como lagarto al sol, cuando me espabilรณ una mezcla de rezongos y silbidos; era un viejo Ford que venรญa desde la tranquera, avanzando entre los รกrboles.
โAlejoโ Ferreya se dirigiรณ a mรญ, mientras bajaba del coche.
–Anoche tuve otro ataque de gota y se me la pasรฉ en vela; preferรญ venir con la fresca โle respondรญ con una voz quebrada por cortos bostezos.
Tras รฉl. Bajaron tambiรฉn los Kahn; era la primera vez que los veรญa lejos del pueblo; nuestros encuentros fueron siempre con el mostrador de por medio o en las visita periรณdicas al consultorio o en alguna que otra urgencia. Venรญan caminando despacio y los pude observar bien. Sara Kahn era una mujer elegante, rubia, alta, con el cabello recogido detrรกs de la nuca; su esposo era tambiรฉn alto, corpulento, de labios gruesos y bigote espeso; la nariz y la cara tenรญan unas manchas rojo-oscuras que delatan su antigua y sostenida relaciรณn con el alcohol.
Les invitรฉ a pasar y a conocer cรณmo era por dentro el casco de La Alborada, y les contรฉ la historia tantas veces contada: โLa estancia la construyรณ Braulio Ortiz, aquรญ puso toda su pasiรณn de hombre aferrado a la tierra. La Alborada es mi vida, solรญa decir, y cuando se enterรณ por mi boca, que la vida se le iba entre las manos, decidiรณ vendรฉrmela. โPรณngala precio, doctor, usted es mejor amigo y sabrรก conservarlaโ.
Les mostrรฉ las galerรญas que deban al Sur, con los techos abovedados de ladrillo macizo, las salas de estar, los hogares de mรกrmol blanco y hierro forjado, el comedor inglรฉs, los sillones, los baรฑos franceses.
Los tacos de la seรฑora Kahn retumbaban en el silencio de los salones; los dos estaban alegres, comunicativos; no parecรญa la misma pareja que recalcรณ en el pueblo un aรฑo atrรกs. Imaginรฉ entonces a Marรญa, espiรกndolos de la cocina, como siempre a la hora de los trenes.
โDeben ser visitas para La Alborada, Goya, fรญjate quรฉ bien vestidos estรกnโ.
Y el viejo jefe, dejar de hojeara :โEl Grรกficoโ y mirarla por encima de sus anteojos emparchados. โNo, seguro que son gringos que compraron la tienda de Don Ramรณnโ.
Recordรฉ que hacia calor ese mediodรญa de
marzo, y la gente se amontonaba en las puertas para verlos pasar. La llegada de los Kahn era un motivo de distracciรณn en los dรญas iguales a las semanas, a los meses y a los aรฑos, que se habรญan detenido en Santa Eduviges, porque eso era Santa Eduviges, un lugar detenido en el espacio y en el tiempo.
Yo tambiรฉn los mirรฉ desde mi ventana y me pareciรณ verme a mรญ mismo, veinte aรฑos atrรกs, cuando lleguรฉ al pueblo, con el diploma fresco y las ilusiones mรกs frescos aรบn, dispuesto a llevarme el mundo por delante.
Santa Eduviges era un poco menos de lo que es ahora: un puntito en el mapa, veinte leguas al Oeste de Rรญo Cuarto. Un puesto de avanzada para mantener a raya a lo Ranqueles y que quedรณ para siempre despuรฉs de la Conquista.
Los veรญa caminar y me imaginรฉ que ellos tambiรฉn, como yo entonces, pensaban en un corto tiempo para hacerse una posiciรณn, dinero y escapar cuanto antes de ese pueblo de mala muerte.
Los Kahn habรญan comprado la mercerรญa de Don Ramรณn, un gallego solterรณn y huraรฑo, mรกs viejo que el mismo pueble, que vendiรณ apurado por irse a morir a su terruรฑo.
Tomaron como domรฉstica a Dominga Brites, viuda de un resero borrachรญn que muriรณ en su ley; los ataques de reuma de Domina la arrastraban seguido a mi consultorio.
โยฟSabe, doctor, quรฉ rara es esa gente? Todos los viernes, cuando anochece, la seรฑora prende siete velas de una cosa asรญa de grande, todo de fierro plateado, se pone un paรฑuelo en la cabeza y estira las manos como tocando el fuego. ยกPaโ mรญ que hace brujerรญas, quรฉ quiere que le diga! ยฟY la mรบsica? ยฟUsted nunca los escuchรณ? Ella se sienta al piano y รฉl toca el violรญn parado. . . Y asรญ estรกn, dale que dale, horas y horas, tocando, sin mirarse ni hablarse, mire ustรฉ, ยฟsabe loqueโes ni una sola palabra? ยกY quรฉ mรบsica triste, vea, parece de velorio! La seรฑora se para delante de una foto que estรก sobre el aparado y se pone meta yorar y yorar que parte el ama, le juro, hasta que viene don Alberto y se la lleva al negocioโ.
Pude conocer la casa cuando el cรณlico renal de don Alberto. La foto que tanta me intriga estaba apoyada contra dos botellones de cristal tallado: eran ellos dos, mรกs jรณvenes, se veรญan felices, sentados sobre el cรฉsped, rodeando un mantel de a cuadros. Ella tiene un chico pelirrojo sobre su falda; al costado habรญa un rรญo, y al fondo del rรญo, un castillo de torres agudas en la punta de un peรฑasco: โHEIDELBERG 1937.โ
Los domingos salรญan temprano en bicicleta, con una canasta para el almuerzo; pasaban frente a la iglesia y se perdรญan por el camino.
โNo sรฉ por quรฉ nunca vienen a misaโ, me comentรณ un dรญa Berosa, el panadero, mientras le sacaba el yeso. โMe enterรฉ tambiรฉn que estuvieron presos en Alemania y a gatas se salvaronโ. โSalinas anda diciendo por ahรญโ, Silvana lo deslizรณ con el primer mate de aquella maรฑana, โque si estuvieran presos por nada buenos serรก. Paโmรญ que les tiene rabia porque nunca le compran un billeteโ.
Fue Alejando Ferreyra quien penetrรณ en el misterio de los Kahn. Desde hace dos aรฑos era director de la Escuela Nacional. Lo habรญan trasladado a Santa Eduviges porque en el Consejo habรญa gente a la que no le gustaban sus ideas polรญticas ni algunos artรญculos suyos publicado en diarios de avanzada. No obstante ser Licenciado en Letras, tenรญa que ganarse la vida como maestro. Era un hombre demasiado grande para ese pueblo. Se convirtiรณ en poco tiempo en el รบnico amigo de los Kahn. Lo invitaron a cenar, a charla, a escuchar mรบsica
โSi usted viera, doctor, quรฉ gente maravillosa, quรฉ cultura, que fibra ponen en todo lo que hacen, desde un โstrudelโ hasta una Sonata de Brahmsโ.
โQuรฉ lastima que no se acerquen a nosotrosโ,–comentรฉ una vez–. โAlejoโ me mirรณ con aire tristรณn. โEs que tienen miedo, usted sabe. . .. Nos quedamos en silencio.
Y ahora estaban en mi estancia. โEl maestro ciruelaโ, como yo le decรญa con efecto, los habรญan convencido para que vinieran a conocer cรณmo era un asado con yerra y doma.
Un rato despuรฉs vino la avalancha de gente; se mezclaban los ruidos: sulkies, volantas, relinchos, autos, bocinas, gritos. Los cรญrculos de mirones alrededor de los asadores, los consejos de siempre,
โChe, Moncho, no se irรก a arrebatar, ยฟno? Mirรก que estรก muy cerca del sueloโ.
Sobre el mediodรญa le hice una seรฑal a Quiroga, el capataz, para que tocase la campana. Las mesas estaban dispuestas bajo los tupidos paraรญsos y frente a ellos, al sol, una hilera de rastras de arado, cubiertas de carne y acurras. Las gotas de grasa chirriaban al caer sobre las brazas; ademรกs habรญa un par de chivitos estaqueados a los costados.
Me sentรฉ junto a ellos, junto a ellos en la primera fila; ayudรฉ a Sara Kahn a sacarse su chaleco rojo y lo colguรฉ sobre el respaldo de su asiento. Usaba una blusa de mangas largas, y, a pesar del calor, no se las arremangรณ.
–ยฟUsted no come achurras, Herr Dรณktor?
–Comรญ demasiadas en mi vida, por eso, la gota. .
A las tres de la tarde presentรฉ los jinetes y llevรฉ a todos los invitados a conocer la caballada: despuรฉs pedรญ a todo el mundo que volviese a sus asientos. El espectรกculo iba a empezar.
De entrada trajeron una novillito pampa para mostrar cรณmo hacรญamos la yerra (la marcada se hacรญa mรกs lejos, en los corrales chicos).
Entonces apareciรณ el chino Anacleta Sosa. Su cara untuosa, redonda, contenรญa uno ojos chiquitos; la nariz chata y los bigotes ralos le caรญan a los costados de la boca. Los peones manearon y tumbaron con rapidez al animal.
El chino sacรณ de las brasas de hierro-marca, dio media vuelta y lo descargรณ con fuerza sobre el lomo de la bestia.
Entonces se levantaron, de golpe, juntos; el humo, el olor a cuero quemados y los dos alaridos, confundidos:
–ยกNAIN! ยกNO, NO, NAIN, NO! Y Sara Kahn corriendo hacia el chino, los pรณmulos encendidos, las venas del cuello como gruesos cordones azules. Y las uรฑas rojas, anclados en las manos de chino!
–Suรฉltame, doรฑa, la voy a golpiar sin querer, por favor, suรฉlteme!
Y Sara Kahn, agotada, vencida, cayendo con los brazos extendidos, los ojos sin brillo, los labios apretados y el chino, aturdido, queriendo ayudarla. . . y al detenerse. . . su palidez y su mirada fija en eso negro. . .brillando al sol, marcado a fuego sobre la muรฑeca descubierta de Sara Kahn:
โA. 247351. . .โ.
____________________________
โThe Brandingโ
โCivilization doesnโt suppress
barbarism, it perfects it.โ
VOLTAIRE
I was sleeping like a lizard in the sun, when a mixture of moans and whistles; it was an old Ford that came from the cattle gate, advancing between the trees.
โAlejoโ Ferreya turned toward mi, while he got down from the car:
โSo early, doctor?โ he asked me, smiling.
โLast night I had another attack of gout and I spent the night unable to sleep; I preferred to come out in the cool air,โ I responded to him with a voice broken with short yawns.
After him. The Kahns, too; it was the first time that I saw them outside of the town; our meetings were simply with the shop counter between us an in the periodic visits to my medical office or something urgent. They came walking slowly and I could observe then well. Sara Kahn was an elegant, woman, tall, with her hair tied back at the nape of her neck; her husband was tall too, corpulent, with a thick mustache; his nose and face had some dark-red stains that betray his long and sustain relation con alcohol.
I invited them to come in and get to know how it was inside of the outside shell of The Alborada, and I told them the story so many times told before: โThe estancia was constructed by Braulio Ortiz, here he put all his passion as a man tied to the land. โLa Alborada is my lifeโ, he used to say, and when he learned from my mouth , that he would die soon, he decided to sell it to me. โOffer a price, doctor, you are my best friend and you will know how to conserve it.
I showed them the galleries that faced the south, with the vaulted rooves of solid bricks, the sitting rooms, the hearths of white marble and wrought iron, the English dining room, the armchairs, the French baths.
Mrs. Kahnโs heels rumbled on the silence of the rooms: the two of them happy, communicative; they didnโt appear like the same couple who stood out in town, a year ago. Then I imagined Maria, spying on them, always at the hour that the trains go by.
โThey must be visitors to La Alborada, Goya, look how well dressed they are.โ
And the old boss man, stopping leafing through El Grรกfico and looking at her from above his patched-up eyeglasses. โNo, for sure they are gringos who bought Don Ramรณnโs store.โ
I remembered that it was hot that midday in March, and the people piled up in the doorways to see them pass by. The arrival of the Kahns was a moment of distraction in the unchanging days of the weeks, months and years that had stopped in Santa Eduviges, because this was Santa Ediviges, a place stopped in time and in place.
I, too, looked at them from my window, and it seemed to me that I was seeing myself, twenty years ago, when I arrived in the town, with a fresh diploma and illusions, even more fresh, ready to win the world in front of me.
Santa Eduviges was little just a little less than it is now: a little dot on the map, twenty leagues east if Rรญo Cuarto. An advance post for the maintenance of the road to the Ranqueles native lands and which remained forever after the Conquest.
They saw them walk and I imagined that they too, like me then, were thinking of a short time in which to make a start, money and escape as soon as possible this god-awful town.
The Kahn had bought the haberdashery from Don Ramรณn, an old and shy Galician bachelor, older than the town itself, who sold it quickly to go and die in his native land.
They took on as a domestic Dominga Brites, the widow of a drunken cowboy who died from his ways, attacks of rheumatism that often brought Domina to my office.
โDo you know, doctor, how strange these people are? Every Friday, when night falls, the lady lights seven candles on a thing this big, all silverplate, she puts a handkerchief on her head and stretches out her hands as if to touch the fire. For me , he is doing witchcraft, what can I say! And the music? Youโve never heard them? She sits at the piano, on and on, hours and hours, playing, without looking or speaking, you see, do you what it is like, not a single word? And what sad music, it seems, yโknow, like a wake! The seรฑora stops in front of a photo that is above the sideboard and she starts to cry and cry that breaks your heart, I swear, until Don Alberto comes in and takes her to the store.โ
I was able to get to know the house because of Don Albertoโs renal cholic. The photo the intrigued me way leaning against two large bottles of cut crystal; there were the two of them, younger, they looked happy, sitting on the grass, surrounded by a checkered spread. She has a red-haired boy on her skirt, at the side there was a river and at the bottom of the river, a castle of sharp towers set at the end of a line of boulders: โHEIDELBERG 1937.โ
On Sundays, they left early on bicycles, with a basket filled with lunch; they passed in front of the church, and they could no longer be be seen on the road.
โI donโt know why they never come to mass,โ Berosa, the baker, commented to me one day, while I took off his cast. โI also found out that they were imprisoned in Germany, and barely saved themselves.โ Salinas goes around saying it,โ Silvina let it slip with the first mate of that morning,โ that if they were arrested, for me it probably wasnโt for anything food. been for anything good. In my opinion, heโs angry at them because they never buy a lottery ticket from him.
It was Alejandro Ferreyra que penetrated the mystery of the Kahns. For many years, he was the director of the National School. They had transferred him to Santa Eduviges because in the Council there were people who didnโt like his political ideas nor some of his articles published in โadvancedโ newspapers. Despite his Bachelor in Letters, he had to earn a living as a teacher. I was a too great a man for this town. In little time, he became the only friend of the Kahns. They invited him for su[[er, to chat, to listen to music.
โIf you saw, doctor, what marvelous people they are, what culture, what energy they put into everything they do, from a โstrudelโ to a Brahms Sonata.โ
โWhat a shame that they donโt approach usโ, I once commented. โAlejoโ looked in a very sad way. โItโs that they are afraid, you know. . .We stayed silently.
And now they are on my estancia. โThe Plum Teacher,โ as I affectionately called him, had convinced them to come to get to know what a branding and a horse-breaking were like.
A while later came an avalanche of people; the noises mixed: sulkies, steering wheels, neighing, autos, car horns, shouts. The circles of observers around the chefs, the usual advice.
โChe, Moncho, isnโt it going to slip away? ยฟNo? Look how close it is to the ground.โ
About midday, I gave the signal to Quiroga, the foreman, to ring the bell. The tables were spread under the bushy paradise plants, and in front of them, in the sun; a line of strings of grates, covered with meat and offal. The drops of grease squeaked, falling on the hot coals; moreover, there were a pair of goats staked out on their sides, cooking.
I sat close to them, near those in the first row. I helped Sara Kahn remove her red vest, and I hung it onto the back of her seat, she wore a long-sleeve blouse, and, in spite of the heat, she didnโt roll them up.
โYou donโt eat achurras, Herr Dรณktor?โ
โI ate too many in my life, for that, the gout. . .
At three in the afternoon, I presented the riders and brought all the invitees over to examine the horses: then I asked everyone to return to their seats. The spectacle was going to begin.
To start, they brought in a calf PAMPA to show how we used to do the branding (the marking was actually done far away in the small corrals.)
Then โThe Chineseโ Anacleta Sosa appeared. His oily.greasy, round face contained small eyes; the broad nose and the thin mustache that fell onto the sides of his mouth. The peons rapidly hobbled the beast and pushed it over.
โThe Chineseโ took the iron-marker from the hot coals, turned around and stamped forcefully on the back of the beast.
Then, they came up, suddenly, together: the smoke, the smell of burnt leather and of the two cries, confused.
โยกNEIN! ยกNO, NO, NEIN, NO! And Sara Kahn, running toward the man, her cheekbones burning, the veins of her neck like two large blue cords. And her red nails, anchored in the hands of the ranchhand!
โLet me go, doรฑa, Iโm going to hurt you without wanting to, please, let go of me!
And Sara Kahn, exhausted, defeated, falling with her arms extended, her eyes without shine, here lips held together and the โChinese,โ confused, wanting to help her. . .and upon stopping. . .he pallidness and he gaze fixed on that black. . .shining in the sun, marked by fire on the uncovered wrist of Sara Kahn.
Centro de Espiritualidad y Cultura Judรญa.Promoviendo los valores de nuestra tradiciรณn desde una perspectiva plural, moderna y espiritual. Miembro del movimiento Masorati – Conservador.
Centro de Espiritualidade e Cultura Judaica, promovendo os valores da nossa tradiรงรฃo numa perspectiva plural, moderna e espiritual. Membro do movimento Masoratรญ – conservador.
Center of Jewish Spirituality and Culture, promoting the values โโof our tradition from a plural, modern and spiritual perspective. Member of the Masorati movement – Conservative.
Ser uma comunidade judaica de referรชncia no judaรญsmo liberal, crรญtico e pensante para o Brasil. Uma kehilรก kedoshรก baseada em valores e conteรบdo, e fundamentada no Ticun Olam e na assistรชncia social. Relevante para seus membros e reconhecida como modelo de acolhimento, de inserรงรฃo social, de integraรงรฃo comunitรกria e de educaรงรฃo abrangente.
Ser una comunidad judรญa de referencia en el judaรญsmo liberal, crรญtico y pensante para Brasil. Una kehilรก kedoshรก basada en valores y contenidos, y cimentada en Ticun Olam y asistencia social. Relevante para sus miembros y reconocida como modelo de acogida, inserciรณn social, integraciรณn comunitaria y educaciรณn integral.
To be a Jewish community of reference in liberal, critical and thinking Judaism for Brazil. A kehilรก kedoshรก based on values โโand content, and founded on Tikun Olam and social assistance. Relevant to its members and recognized as a model of reception, social involvement, community integration and comprehensive education. – Website
La Comunidad Bet El de Mรฉxico es una congregaciรณn pluralista e incluyente, suscrita a los principios del Movimiento Conservador o Masortรญ Mundial, que brinda a sus socios una forma de vivir el judaรญsmo a tono con el mundo moderno, permitiendo a la familia rezar juntos y ofreciendo espacios a la participaciรณn activa de todos sus miembros.
A Comunidade Bet El do Mรฉxico รฉ uma congregaรงรฃo pluralista e inclusiva, inscrita no princรญpios do Movimento Conservador ou Masorti Mundial, que oferece aos seus membros uma forma de viver o judaรญsmo em sintonia com o mundo moderno, permitindo que a famรญlia reze em conjunto e oferecendo espaรงos para a participaรงรฃo ativa de todos os seus membros.
.Bet El unit in Mexico is a pluralistic and inclusive congregation, pluralistic and inclusive region, subscribed to the principles of the Conservative Movement or World Masorti, which offers its members a way of living Judaism in tune with the modern world, allowing the family to pray together and offering spaces for the active participation of all its members. – Sitio web
Andrรฉs Balla naciรณ en 1926 en Budapest, Hungria. Sobreviviรณ los primeros aรฑos de la Shoรก y en 1939 pudo llegar a la Argentina, donde se radicรณ. escritor, periodista, mรฉdico pediatra y dermatรณlogo, docente en la Facultad de Medicina, Universidad de Buenos Aires. Autor de una extensa y reconocido obra teatral y narrativa, obtuvo a lo largo de su carrera varios premios e importantes premios (Premio Municipal de la Novela, Premio Internacional Literoy de Madrid, Faja de Honor de la Sociedad Argentina de Escritores entre muchos otros. Entre sus principales tรญtulos: “El marinero de la montaรฑa”, “Sala de niรฑos”, “El Inca Tupac Amaru” y “Viana”. Escribiรณ asimismo, novelas, cuentos y poesรญa. Muriรณ en 2000.
_______________________________________
Andrรฉs Balla was born in 1926 in Budapest, Hungary. He survived the first years of the Shoah and in 1939 he was able to reach Argentina, where he settled. writer, journalist, pediatrician and dermatologist, professor at the Faculty of Medicine, University of Buenos Aires. Author of an extensive and recognized theatrical and narrative work, he won several awards and important awards throughout his career (Municipal Prize for Novel, Madrid International Literoy Award, Honor Belt of the Argentine Society of Writers, among many others. His main titles: “The mountain sailor”, “Children’s Room”, “The Inca Tupac Amaru” and “Viana.” He also wrote novels, short stories and poetry. He died in 2000.
Durante ciento cincuenta aรฑos, Argentina y Gran Bretaรฑa habรญan disputado las Islas FalkIand en el Atlรกntico Sur. En 1982, la junta militar dirigida por el teniente general Leopoldo Galtieri atacรณ las Malvinas como un medio para promover el sentimiento patriรณtico y apuntalar su rรฉgimen. Las fuerzas anfibias argentinas rรกpidamente vencieron a la pequeรฑa guarniciรณn de marines britรกnicos en la ciudad de Stanley, y la primera ministra Margaret Thatcher, indignada, enviรณ un fuerza naval. Despuรฉs de intensas batallas navales alrededor de las Malvinas, las tropas britรกnicas desembarcaron en East Falkland. Despuรฉs de varias semanas de lucha sangrienta , la guarniciรณn argentina en Stanley se rindiรณ, poniendo fin al conflicto. Del lado argentino, la mayorรญa de los soldados eran reclutas, mal entrenados y mal abastecidos. Los soldados judรญos enfrentaron un severo antisemitismo por parte de sus oficiales.
For 150 years, Argentina and Great Britain had disputed the Falkland Islands in the South Atlantic. In 1982, the military junta led by Lieutenant General Leopoldo Galtieri attacked the Falklands as a means of promoting patriotic sentiment and propping up his regime. Argentine amphibious forces quickly defeated the small garrison of British marines in the city of Stanley. Britain was outraged and Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher sent a naval task force. After intense naval battles fought around the Falklands, British troops landed in East Falkland. After several weeks of brutal fighting, the great Argentine garrison at Stanley surrendered, ending the conflict. On the Argentine side, most of the soldiers were conscripts, poorly trained and poorly supplied. Jewish soldiers faced severe anti-Semitism from their officers.
De:/From: Ricardo Feierstein, eds..Isabel y Andrรฉs Balla: Un recorrido humano y literario. Buenos Aires: Editorial Milรก, 2005, 210-216. (fragmento de la novela Pradera de ganso, 1987; excerpt from the novel Goose’s Meadow, 1987.)
________________________________________
โLos Gurkhas”
Monte Kent, 12 de junio
En medio del martilleo de los nuevos Sea Harrier, que dominan el aire, presa de gran nerviosidad y tensiรณn, aguardamos la ofensiva. A pesar de la superioridad del armamento de los ingleses, que nos consta, no queremos perder la esperanza de poder contenerlos, pero nadie pone en duda que la batalla serรญa sangrienta.
Un centinela avisรณ que venรญa alguien de la direcciรณn de Puerto Darwin, haciendo seรฑas desesperadamente para que no tirรกramos. Un sargento mayor lo enfocรณ con los prismรกticos. Era un soldado argentina, un muchacho joven, sin armas. Llegรณ sofocado, el rostro desencajado, con ojos de espanto.
–ยฟDe dรณnde venรญs? ยฟQuรฉ te pasรณโlo interrogamos, alarmados por su aspecto. Np pudo articular palabra. Le ofrecimos un cigarrillo encendido. Dio dos o tres chupadas, se ahogรณ con el humo, rompiรณ a llorar. Despuรฉs de un rato, sacudido por los sollozos, explotรณ:
–ยกLos gurkhas degollaron a mis compaรฑeros!
Nos miramos, lรญvidos de consternaciรณn.
–Sentรกte โlo tratรณ con tono de hermano mayor un soldado del batallรณn que ya estaba en el puesto cuando mi patrulla se le agregรณ.
Se sentรณ en el suelo. Formamos un cรญrculo alrededor de รฉl. El aire se encargaba de horror y cรณlera. Un presagio funesto nublรณ el dรญa. Los puรฑos crispados tocaban a rebato. El soldado invitรณ al muchacho a hablar, con un movimiento de la cabeza.
โTenรญamos a nuestro cargo โarrancรณ con dificultadโun puesto de observaciรณn frente al sendero que va de Puerto Darwin a Puerto Argentino, ruta obligada de las columnas inglesas, que ya habรญan comenzado a desplazarse en direcciรณn al Este. โHizo una pausa para tomar aliento. Chupรณ el cigarrillo como si fuera un tรณnica. โรramos diez hombres al mando de un cabo. ยกAhora soy el รบnico que queda con vida!
Ardรญan las llagas del silencio. El conscripto tirรณ el cigarrillo y siguiรณ con voz temblorosa:
โEsta maรฑana divisamos una formaciรณn enemiga. Que se acercaba, desplegada entre las lomas. Podรญan ser veinticinco a treinta hombres. Abrimos fuego. Respondieron. Abatimos uno o dos, el resto seguรญa avanzando, sin dejar de disparar. Se armรณ un tiroteo infernal.
โLos atacantes eran delgados, de talla menor que la mediana, รกgiles como bestias salvajes. Avanzaban indiferentes a la balacera. Algunos escuchaban mรบsica con auriculares. Reรญan como si estuvieron drogados. Los identificamos por sus rostros asiรกticos: eran gurkhas. Rodearon el puesto. Era imposible defenderlos, nos triplicaron en nรบmero. El cabo se rindiรณ; los muchachos, salvo yo, lo imitaron.
โEl instinto me advirtiรณ que antes de entregarme, me fijara cรณmo trataban a los prisioneros de guerra. Habรญa oรญdo historias escalofriantes sobre la ferocidad de los gurkhas. Me hice le muerto y observรฉ con los ojos entornados quรฉ pasaba despuรฉs de la rendiciรณnโ.
Se interrumpiรณ, demudado. Por un instante mirรณ fijamente el vacรญo, luego reanudo el relato con voz quebrada.
โAl cabo le degollaron en el acto. Los muchachos, aterrizados, rogaron a los gurkhas de rodillas que no los mataran. ยกLos degollaron a uno tras otro!โ
La trincha se sublevรณ. El aire se estremecรญa de ira.
โCerrรฉ los ojos, dominรฉ de mis miembros y permanecรญ inmรณvil como un cadรกver. Los oรญ parlotear en su lengua y reรญr como alucinados. Exploraron el puesto. Pasaron por encima de mi cuerpo. Uno de ellos me pateรณ; no reaccionรฉ. Finalmente se retiraron.
–โCuando dejรฉ de oรญr sus odiosas voces, me asomรฉ cautelosamente al borde de la loma: volvieron por el mismo sendero por el que habรญan venido. Su misiรณn era silenciar el puesto de observaciรณn. Cumplida la tarea a la manera tradicional ghurkha, regresaron a su base.
โEl puesto era un matadero. Huรญ despavoridoโ. Quiso seguir hablando, pero las palabras se coagularon en la boca.
El horror era una presencia fรญsica. Un muchacho exploto:
–ยฟPara esto nos trajeron acรก? ยฟPara pelear con criminales, no con soldados? ยฟPara que diez conscriptos y un cabo tengan que hacer frente a treinta asesinos asalariados?
–ยกCรกllese! ยกNo sea maricรณn! โexplotรณ a nuestros espaldas la voz de un oficial. Nos dimos vuelta. Rรญgido, severo, nos fulminรณ con la mirada. Sin embargo, habrรญa notado en nuestra actitud que algo grave habรญa ocurrido, porque bajรณ el tono –ยฟQuรฉ pasรณ?
Intervine, rรญgido tambiรฉn, con voz de helado:
–ยกLos gurkhas degollaron a sus compaรฑeros, que se habรญan rendido, mi teniente!
El oficial arrugรณ el entrecejo y llamรณ aparte al sobreviviente de la masacre. Una lluvia fina comenzรณ o llorar sobre nuestro silencio petrificado.
Cerro Dos Hermanos, 13 de junio.
Los ingleses nos dejaron dormir algunas horas, luego nos sometieron a un recio bombardeo aรฉreo sincronizado con un caรฑoneo no menos intenso de su artillerรญa. A media maรฑana atacaron. Comprobamos con cierto alivio que no eran gurkhas, sino soldados, infantes de marina y paracaidistas. El cabo observรณ observaba sus desplazamientos con los prismรกticos. Venรญan hablando tranquilamente en voz alta, como si discutieron sobre un partido de criquet. En medio del tableteo de la metralla, los estampidos de los obuses, el estruendo de los caรฑonazos y las explosiones de las bombas, apareciรณ a nuestra izquierda una formaciรณn de helicรณpteros artillados, con la evidente intenciรณn de realizar un desembarco a nuestras espaldas o en un flanco para encerrarnos entre dos fuegos.
En el pandemonio que se armรณ, perdรญ la nociรณn de dรณnde estaban los ingleses y dรณnde los nuestros. Disparรกbamos nuestras armas maquinalmente, apuntando al aza. Era un misterio cรณmo los dos comandantes podรญan orientarse a aquella confusiรณn y dirigir batalla.
La muerte zapateaba en el Cerro Dos Hermanos. Caรญan heridos, se apagaban gritos, se alistaban cadรกveres en la nรณmina de los muertos por la patria. Oscuros samaritanos, quijotes anรณnimos, los camilleros corrรญan agachados entre las balas, transportando su carga de sangre y dolor rumbo a un puesto de socorro, exponiendo la vida propia para rescatar la ajena. Para mรญ eran los verdaderos hรฉroes de la jornada.
Para curar y trasladar a los heridos de guerra, los ingleses emplean tecnologรญa avanzada. Cuando ya declinaba la batalla y la columna britรกnica se replegaba, presenciรฉ una escena de pelรญcula de ciencia-ficciรณn.
Aterrizรณ un helicรณptero con el emblema de la Cruz Roja, descendieron varios ingleses, uno llevaba una caja. Fueron hasta un herido. Manipularon la caja y se abriรณ una especie de gran paraguas o mampara de plรกstico. Bajo la protecciรณn de aquel artefacto efectuaron la primera cura, luego transportaron al herido al helicรณptero. Cerraron la mampara de plรกstico y subieron el aparato, que despegรณ y en minutos desapareciรณ del lado del Monte Kent. Vinieron otros helicรณpteros con el emblema de la Cruz Roja y curaron y trasladaron de la misma manera a heridos, tanto ingleses como argentinos.
Paradoja britรกnica comentรฉ con los muchachos que estaban a mi lado en la trincheraโCuran a los enemigos heridos igual que a los suyos propios, pero mandan a la vanguardia de sus tropas a los inhumanos asesinos gurkhas.
Coletazo de la batalla, a รบltima hora de la tarde, nos castigรณ otro bombardeo. Cuando se fueron los aviones y los ingleses no se veรญan mรกs, los muchachos estallaron en exclamaciones de jรบbilo por โhabernos rechazadoโ u โobligado a replegarseโ. Lejos de compartir su optimismo, sospechรฉโcon fundamentado motivoโque se trataba de una corta tregua tรกctica. Habรญa sido testigo de la asombrosa movilidad de los paracaidista britรกnicos y era sobreviviente del que nos habรญa expulsado del Monte Kent. Sabรญa que los ingleses se estaban regrupando para desencadenar a la noche un ataque devastador.
–Tienen visores al infrarrojoโadvertรญ a mi incrรฉdulo auditorio. En base de mi propia experiencia reciente y corroborando la composiciรณn del lugar del cabo–. Ven en la oscuridad como si fuera de dรญa a la luz del sol. Anoche nos cazaban como a conejos. Me salvรฉ por casualidad.
Me instaron a contar mi historia. En la falsa calma del anochecer, que olรญa de pรณlvora, narrรฉ la crรณnica de una pesadilla.
โDormรญamos, confiados. Los centinela eran figuras decorativas desprovistas del sentido de la vista y del oรญdo. Nadie pegรณ el grito de alerta. Me despertรฉ cuando el puesto ya esta en llamas y tenรญamos los ingleses encima. Muchos compaรฑero cuyas trincheras acaban de volar en pedazos, no se despertaron mรกs. Al resplandor de las explosiones captรฉ una visiรณn alucinante, que los disparos de la artillerรญa britรกnica, efectuados instantes en la oscuridad, para nosotros invisible, desorganizaban con matemรกtica precisiรณn nuestra red de trincheras. Alcancรฉ a ver tambiรฉn uno de nuestros puestos de artillerรญa en el momento en que se convertรญa en charrara. Era indudable que los ingleses empleaban dispositivos que les permitรญan ver con claridad en la niche cerrada.
โActo segundo atacรณ la infanterรญa, disparando sus armas, que tambiรฉn causaron los estragos. Tiroteamos a ciegos a un enemigo invisible, que nos veรญa. Los que nos salvamos de las primeras andadas abandonamos el campo precipitadamente e intentamos agruparnos en una formaciรณn. No encontramos a ningรบn oficial ni suboficial. Era un caos. No sรฉ a quiรฉnes baleรกbamos en la confusiรณn. El aire era un pentagrama diabรณlico cruzada por las balas trazadoras. No se podรญa ni pensar en resguardarse de los proyectiles, era cuestiรณn de tener suerte o caer fulminando.
โLa defensa era imposible. El Monte Kent hacรญa agua por los cuatro costados Escapamos a campo traviesa. Despuรฉs de una azarosa huida bajo un cielo constelado de fantรกstica pirotecnia, amanecimos en el Cerro dos Hermanosโ.
Se instalรณ un silencio de la cripta. Las miradas se evitaban. Cada cual permaneciรณ absorto, sumido en sus cavilaciones.
Saquรฉ la quena de la mochila. Improvisรฉ reminiscencias de la infancia, ensoรฑaciones de Pradera del Ganso, veraneos en una laguna donde nadaban patos silvestres y planeaban aves de plumaje blanco, la mano de mi madre, los ojos de Cecilia. Las risas de mis amigos. Viajรฉ por la Quebrada de Humahuaca, la Cordillera, la pampa paรญses que no conozco mรกs que por referencias, regiones imaginarias.
El atardecer trascurriรณ en silencio. Comimos en silencio, nos atrincheramos en silencio. Un cielo mudo y sin estrellas desplegรณ su velo de sombras sobre el silencio del Cerro Dos Hermanas.
13 de junio, de noche.
Mi letra debe ser caรณtica. Escribo en la oscuridad. Tengo necesidad de comunicarme con alguien, asรญ sea mi propio diario. Mis compaรฑeros duermen el sueno pesado de agotamiento. El recuerdo del aquelarre de anoche me tiene desvelado. Si vuelven a atacar, no quiero que me sorprenden dormido.
Reproduzco mentalmente mis รบltimas improvisaciones con la quena, evoco la voz de mi madre cuando se despide con su โBuenas noches, hijoโ pleno de ternura.
Se quiebra el encantamiento. El silencio se hace aรฑicos. La ladera a nuestros pies palpita a la sordina. Allรก abajo bulle de botas militares. ยกLos ingleses!
Pego el grito de alarma, remplazado el centinela, que nos los ve. Yo, que conozco al ataque nocturno, los oigo.
In the midst of the hammering of the new Sea Harriers, that dominated the sky, despite great deal of nervousness and tension, we hold the offensive. In spite of the superiority of the English armament, that faces us, we donโt want to lose the hope of being able to contain them but no one doubted that the battle would be bloody.
A sentinel advised that someone was coming from the direction of Post Darwin, signally desperately that we donโt shoot. A sargent major focused on him through his binocular/ It was an Argentine soldier, a young boy, un armed. He arrived breathless, his face distorted, with shocked eyes,
โWhere are you coming from? What happened to you?โ we questioned him, alarmed by how he looked.
He couldnโt articulate a word. We offered him a lit cigarette. He took two or three drags, choked on the smoke, broke into tears. After a while, shaken by sobbing, he exploded:
The Gurkhas beheaded my companions!
We looked at each other, livid with consternation.
โSit down,โ a soldier from the battalion, who was already at the post when my patrol arrived, treated him as if he. was his older brother.
He sat on the ground. We formed a circle around him. The air was filled with horror and anger. An evil omen clouded the day. The shaking fists touched in response. The soldier invited the boy to speak, with a movement of his head.
โWe had our job,โ he forced out with difficulty: โan observation post in front of the road that goes from Port Darwin to Port Argentina, a required route for the English columns, that had already begun to travel in the toward the East,โ he paused to get breath. He took drags on the cigarette as if it were a tonic. โWe were ten men under the command of a corporal. Now I am the only one left alive!โ
The wounds of silence burned. The conscript threw away the cigarette and continued in a trembling voice:
โThis morning we observed an enemy formation. It approached, spread out among the hills. They could have been twenty-five and thirty men. We opened fire. They responded. We brought down one or two. The rest continued advancing, without ceasing their shooting. An infernal fire fight took place.
The attackers were slim, shorter than average, agile as wild beasts. The advanced indifferent to the shooting. Some listened to music through earphones. They laughed as if they were drugged. We identified them by their Asian faces. They were Gurhkas. They surrounded us. It was impossible to defend against them. The corporal surrendered; the boys, except me, imitated him
โMy instinct warned me that before giving myself up, I should watch how they treated prisoners of war. I had heard chilling stories about the ferocity of the Gurkhas. I acted as if I were dead and I watched with half-closed eyes what happened after the surrender.โ
He interrupted himself, his face changed in color. For a moment, he starred into the emptiness, then he resumed the story, his voice broken:
โThey immediately beheaded the corporal. The boys, terrified, on their knees, begged the Ghurkas for their lives. The beheaded them, one after the other!โ
The men were beyond themselves. The air shook with anger.
โI closed my eyes, controlled my arms and legs, and remained as immobile as a cadaver. I heard them chat in their language and laugh like crazy men. They explored the post. They passed over my body. One of them kicked me; I didnโt react. Finally, they retired.
โWhen I no longer heard their odious voices, I carefully peeked out over the hill. They returned by the same trail on which they had come. Their mission was to silence the observation post. The job done in the traditional Gurkha manner, they returned to their base.โ
โThe post was a slaughterhouse. Terrified, I fled. He wanted to keep speaking, but the words coagulated in his mouth.
The horror was a physical presence. A fellow exploded:
โThey brought us here for this? To fight with criminals, not with soldiers? So that ten draftees and a corporal have to face thirty mercenary assesins?
โShut up! Donโt be a fag!,โ exploded at our backs the voice of an officer. We turned around. Rigid, severe he burnt us with his gaze. Nonetheless, he would have noted in our attitude that something grave had occurred, because he lowered his tone. โWhat happened?โ
I intervened, rigid too, with a voice of ice:
โThe Gurkhas beheaded their companions, who had surrendered, liuitenant . The officer wrinkled his eyebrows and called aside the survivor of the massacre. A fine rain began to cry over our petrified silence.
Dos Hermanas Hill, June 13
The English let us sleep for a few hours, then they summited us to an intense aerial bombardment, synchronize with a no less intense from their artillery. In the mid-morning, they attacked. We established that they werenโt Gurhkas, but soldiers, marines and parachutists. The corporal observed their movements through his binoculars. They came speaking tranquilly in loud voices, as if they were discussing a game of croquet. In the midst of the rattle of the machine gun, the retorts of the howitzers and the din if the cannon blasts and the explosions of the bombs, appeared at our left a formation of armored helicopters, with the evident intention to undertake a landing at our backs or a flank to close us in between two fires.
In the pandemonium that took place, I lost the notion of where the English were and where ours were. We shot our arms mechanically, aiming wildly. I was a mystery how the two commanders could orient themselves through that confusion a direct the battle.
Death tap danced on Two Sister Hill. The wounded fell, the shouts stopped, cadavers were listed in the payroll of the dead for the homeland. Unknown Samaritans, anonymous, the stretcher carriers ran bent over among the bullets, transporting their weight of blood and pain toward a treatment post, exposing their own lives to rescue those of another. For me, they were the true heroes of the day.
To cure and move the war wounded, the English employed advanced technology. When the battle lessened and the British column pulled back, I witnessed a scene from a scene from a science fiction movie.
A helicopter showing the emblem of Red Cruz landed, several English descended, one carrying a box. They went over to a wounded man. They manipulated the box and a type of large umbrella or plastic screen. Under the protection of that artefact, they did first ais, they transported the wounded man to the helicopter. They closed the plastic screen and raised the apparatus, took off and in minutes disappeared at the other side of Mount Kent. Other helicopters with the Red Cross came and cured and transported the wounded in the same way, be they English or Argentine.
โA British paradoxโ, I commented to the boys who were at my side in the trench. They cure the enemy wounded just like their own, but they send to the vanguard of their troops the inhuman assassin gurkhas.
The battle fading out, at the last hour of the afternoon,
Another bombardment punished us. When the airplanes left and the English were no longer seen, they boys let our joyous exclamations for โour having beaten them backโ o โforced them to retreat.โ Far from haring their optimism, I suspectedโwith well-grounded reasonโthat that it was a shot tactical ceasefire. I had been a witness to the amazing mobility of the British parachutists, and I was a witness to what had expelled up from Mount Kent. I knew that the English were regrouping themselves to unleash a devasting attack at dawn. โThey have infrared visors,โ I warned my unbelieving audience. Based on my recent experience, what was corroborated by the composition of the outcropping. They come in darkness as if it were by day with sunlight. Last night, they chased us like rabbits. By chance, I survived.
I persisted in telling my story. In the false calm of nightfall, that smelled of gunpowder, I narrated the tale of a nightmare.
โWe slept, confident. The sentinels were decorative figures, without the sense of sight and hearing. Nobody yelled the alarm. I wake up when the post was already in flames and the English were upon us. Many comrades whose trenches had just flown apart in pieces, never awoke again. At the brilliance of the explosions hallucinatory vision, that the shots of the British artillery, set up in instants in the darkness, invisible to us, broke with mathematical precision our web of trenches. I rose up to also see one of our artillery posts at the moment it was turned into twisted metal. It was undoubtable that the English were employing slides that allowed them to see clearly in the dark night.
โSecond Act: the infantry attacked, shooting their arms, that also caused havoc. We shot blindly at an invisible enemy, who saw us. Those of us who survived the first round, abandoned the camp precipitously, and we intended to regroup in a unit. We couldnโt find and officer or a non-commissioned officer. I was chaos. I donโt know at whom we were shooting in the confusion. The air was a diabolical pentagram crossed by the tracing bullets. You couldnโt think about protecting yourself, it was a question of being lucky or falling, struck down.
Defense was impossible. Mount Kent was melting on all sides. We escaped across the field. After a perilous perilous flight under a sky constellated sky of fantastic pyrotechnics, by dawn we were at the Two Sisters Hill.โ
The silence of a crypt settled in. Glances at each other were avoided. Each one remained absorbed, immersed in his own worries.
I took the quena from my mochila. I improvised memories of childhood, dreams of Pradera del Ganso, summer vacations spent in a lake where wild ducks and birds with white plumage glided, my motherโs hand, Ceciliaโs eyes. The laughter of my friends. I traveled through the Quebrada de Humahuaca, la Cordillera, the pampa, countries that I only know by mention, imaginary regions.
The afternoon passed in silence. We ate in silence; we dug our ditches in silence. A mute sky and without stars spread its veil of shadows over the silence of Two Sisters Hill.
June 13, at night.
My writing must be chaotic. I write in the darkness. I have the need to communicate with someone, even if it is my own diary. My comrades sleep the heavy sleep of exhaustion. The memory of last nightโs witchโs coven keeps me awake. I they are going to attack again I donโt want they surprise me while I sleep.
I mentally reproduce my last improvisations on the quena, I evoke the voice of my mother when she says goodbye, โBuenas noches, hijo,โ full of tenderness.
The enchantment breaks. The silence is shattered. The hillside at our feet throbs quietly. There, below, the military boots moved. I push the alarm bell, in place of the sentinel, who sees us. I, who know of night-time attacks, hear them.
Adina Darvasi naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1927. A los dos aรฑos de edad la familia se trasladรณ a Santiago de Chile. Los primeros aรฑos de la escuela primaria los cursรณ en el colegio Manuel de Salas.A raรญz del divorcio de sus padres, en 1937 viajรณ con su padre a Hotรญn, (entonces Rumania) poco antes del comienzo de la Segunda Guerra Mundial. Durante la guerra fue deportada junto con su padre y el resto de los habitantes judรญos de Hotรญn, al gueto Moguilev, Transnistria-Ucrania, donde padeciรณ horribles persecuciones raciales, por parte de soldados alemanes y rumanos. Adina permaneciรณ en el gueto dos aรฑos y medio. Debido a intensas gestiones realizadas por su madre, quien residรญa en Santiago, un diplomรกtico argentino logrรณ rescatar a la niรฑa del gueto, gracias a su nacionalidad argentina. Enseguida fue aceptada a un colegio de monjas francesas, Notre Dame de Ziรณn en Bucarest, en cuyo internado permaneciรณ hasta mediados del aรฑo 1944 – cuando partiรณ a Palestina (bajo mandato britรกnico) En Jerusalรฉn ingresรณ al liceo ‘Haguimnasia Haivrit’ en el cual terminรณ sus estudios secundarios. En 1947 volviรณ a Santiago, reuniรฉndose con su madre. Realizรณ sus estudios universitarios en la Facultad de Arquitectura de la Universidad de Chile, recibiรฉndose de arquitecta en el aรฑo 1962. En 1972 se radicรณ en Israel, con su esposo y tres hijos, lugar de su residencia permanente. Junto con ejercer su profesiรณn, Adina ha dedicรณ varios aรฑos al estudio de literatura iberoamericana en la Universidad Hebrea de Jerusalรฉn.
Adina Darvasi was born in Buenos Aires in 1927. When she was two, the family moved to Santiago de Chile. Following the divorce of his parents, in 1937 she traveled with her father to Hotรญn, (then Romania) shortly before the start of the Second World War. During the war she was deported along with her father and the rest of the Jewish inhabitants of Hotรญn, to the Moguilev ghetto, Transnistria-Ukraine, where she suffered horrible racial persecution by German and Romanian soldiers. Adina remained in the ghetto for two and a half years. Due to intense efforts by her mother, who lived in Santiago, an Argentine diplomat managed to rescue the girl from the ghetto, thanks to her Argentine nationality. She was immediately accepted to a French nuns’ school, Notre Dame de Ziรณn in Bucharest, in whose boarding school she remained until mid-1944 – when she left for Palestine (under British mandate). In Jerusalem, she studied at ‘Haguimnasia Haivrit’ where she completed her high school studies. In 1947 she returned to Santiago, meeting with her mother. She completed her university studies at the Faculty of Architecture of the University of Chile, graduating as an architect in 1962. In 1972, she settled in Israel, with her husband and three children, the place of her permanent residence. Along with practicing her profession, Adina devoted several years to the study of Ibero-American literature at the Hebrew University of Jerusalem. She died in 2014.
__________________________
“El viaje”
Primera parte:
Embarque, agosto 1937
ยฟCรณmo asรญ de repente, un viaje en barco? โse admirรณ Dana mientras probaba el vestido de seda celeste con aplicaciones blancas. Papรก aceptaba comprarle lo que querรญa, pedir no mรกs. ยกQuรฉ buenos! Probar y probar. Porque de la casa partieron con un bolso de mano, sin mรกs equipaje.
–Le queda lindaโsonriรณ la vendedoraโes el color de sus ojos. ยฟUn abriguito tal vez? Azul con botones dorados.
–Sรญ, claro, las tardes son frescas y estaremos un mes en el mar [. . .]
El barco inglรฉs le parecรญa enorme, con sus mรบltiples cubiertas a distintos niveles; todo flamante, por la pintura flamante. Oropresa, quรฉ nombre raro. Dana imaginรณ lingotes y mรกs lingotes de oro en sus profundas bodegas, alineadas e fila como los soldaditos de plomo del hermano de Chepa.
–Papรก, dรฉjame a mรญ en la cama de arriba, asรญ, estarรฉ justo frente a la ventana redonda mirando al mar. Mira, mira como los pรกjaros estรกn rodando al barco. ยฟNos acompaรฑarรกn todo el viaje?
–Todavรญa no sabe. [. . .]
Golda no tenรญa hijos; hace pocos meses Fani habรญa muerto. Todo en la enorme casa-quinta de Hotin emanaba olor a mortajas; se podรญa decir, sin errar, que la muerte vivรญa en cada rincรณn, mueble y adorno. Se la mencionaba sin cesar, en las comidas, al levantarse; de noche, se escuchaban gritos de angustia: Fani, Fani.
Dana veรญa las fotografรญas de Fani dispersas por todos los cuartos, enmarcada y colgadas en los muros; sueltas, de diversos tamaรฑos, sobre los muebles. La mirada penetrante de ultratumba la perseguรญa; trataba de cruzar las manos como la muerta, de sonreรญr con la comisura de los labios hacia abajo; no lo lograba; el peinado tampoco podรญa copiarlo. [. . .]
Fani, brillante, buena y hermosa, era inigualable e inalcanzable. Dana lo odiaba, un odio estรฉril; lo peor que se le puede es desear a un enemigo–la muerteโno venรญa al caso. . . por el contrario, sรณlo si resucitara, llegarรญa la salvaciรณn; pero Dana sabรญa que, aparte de Jesucristo, nadie habรญa resucitado. Nunca, aun tratando mucho, podrรก, ni siquiera remotamente, parecerse a la difunta. [. . ]
Por Golda quien propuso a Hanรกn venir de Amรฉrica a vivir con ellos, el tรญo opinรณ distinto: ยฟPara quรฉ liquidar todo? Que se divorcie allรก y rehaga su vida en sin volver a Hotรญn. El tรญo no estaba demasiado dolorido, le molestaba el timbre de una voz infantil, el correr; no querรญa encariรฑarse con la policรญa de nuevo, no podรญa. [. . .]
ยกVienen los rusos! Ocuparon la zona, Hotรญn y Chernovitz tambiรฉn: Se repartieron con los alemanes hasta territorios polacos โ exclamรณ el primo Aquiba, al escuchar el รบltimo noticiero radial. [. . .]
La inseguridad comenzรณ a reinar, las dudas, el susurro, que
no escuchen. . .: ! Hasta las paredes escuchanโ[. . . ] ยฟEstaremos en la lista negra?
No, no alcanzarรญan a deportarlos; en todo caso, no los rusos. [. . .]
Seconda parte
Tempesdad, June, 1941
Hija mรญa, me espantan las noticias de los diarios: la guerra aproximรกndose a vuestra zona; tu papรก, ยฟllevarรญa al frente? ยกQuรฉ temor! Tรบ, por lo menos, te quedarรกs a salvo con los tรญos [. . .]
El ensordecedor ruido de los motores despertaron a Dana; corriรณ a la ventana: –Me parecรญa distinguir a los pilotos con sus anteojos y gorros negros–. Escuchรณ estampidos, descargan las bombas [. . .] La guerra lejana, cosa de diarios y noticiarios radiales, habรญa llegado, se escuchaba y se palpaba.[. . .]
Llegado el dรญa seรฑalado, acorralaron a los judรญos de Hotรญn en la explanada frente al mercado, donde estacionaban los campesinos en dรญas de feria, con sus ovejunos y vacunos. Habรญa miles de deportados. mujeres, niรฑos y hombres envueltos por un nube de misterio: –ยฟPor quรฉ nos echan, cuรกl es nuestro pecado? ยฟEsta noche, dรณnde dormiremos? ยฟSaldremos vivos? ยฟSe volvieron locos los soldados? โConfundieron delito con locura. [. . .]
Los deportados avanzaban lentamente, acongojados, escoltados por militares romanos armados, con plenos poderes de abusar, herir y matar.[. . .]
Los niรฑos no cesaban su llanto desgarrador; el murmullo de los adultos perplejos seguรญa: ยฟa dรณnde? ยฟpor quรฉ? Polvo levantado por el viento, pegado a los narices, al pelo, a la ropa, al cuerpo sudorosa. Comenzรณ a oscurecer; la luna apareciรณ, llena, desconcertada.
Primera noche de su vida en la inhรณspita intemperie; la fatiga no permitรญa razonar, sรณlo imperaban las necesidades primarias, sensoriales: calor, frรญo, hambre, dolor. [. . .] Luego, muy luego, a Dana se le irรญan acabando las fuerzas.
Con el alba, los soldados renovaron la marcha forzada, arriando como a un ganado, gritando, a latigazos. –ยกAhora no puedo mรกs! Tengo ampollas reventados en el otro pie, me duele tanto. [. . .]
Soldados del Ejรฉrcito Rumano 1943
Se vio rodeada de extraรฑos, oprimidos, amenazados; sintiรณ escalofrรญo ante el desamparo y soledad infinita. Sobre el lecho de hojas y ramas secas, iniciรณ el juego: morirse como liberaciรณn de tormento.[. . .]
Ahora es noche allรก, mientras estรกs durmiendo sobre su almohada, ยฟte acordarรกs de mรญ en tus sueรฑos? ยกCuรกnto te quisiera! [. . .]
La primera vรญctima, una criatura de meses, muriรณ asfixiada entre bรกrtulos. La madre: –Quizรก Dios me la quitรณ antes de sufriera mรกs; en vez de llorar deberรญa agradecer. [. . .]
–Algo me camina por la cabezaโse admirรณ Dana–ยฟserรกn hormigas?
Ojalรก hubiesen sido hormiguitas: ยกeran piojos! Invasiรณn de piojos, grandes amarillentos, asquerosos, con huevos adheridos porfiadamente a los pelos; no habรญa manera de librarse de ellos. Asco de sรญ misma: arrancarse, huir, sin tener a dรณnde ni cรณmo. [. . .]
Divisaron el rรญo Dniester; cerca del embarcadero se distinguรญa un puente destruido, dinamitado por los rusos al retirarse; faltarรญan meses, hasta que los alemanes comenzaron a construir uno nuevo con el trabajo forzado de los deportados. [. . .]
Llegรณ la hora de seguir hasta el otro lado del rรญo Dniester, y no pasarรญan desaparecidos con el tumulto de antes. La balsa se deslizรณ lentamente, suavemente, hacia el nuevo desvรญo caรณtico de sus vidas. [. . .]
Hija mรญa, tu odio, lo palpo; traspasa continentes, mares y ocรฉanos, penetra en todos mis poros. [. . .]
Simultรกneamente les dio tifus exantemรกtico; padre e hija yacรญan en el cuarto grande. Katia atendiรฉndolos. Fiebre altรญsima. Dana sentรญa palpitaciones en la cabeza, perdido en los sentidos por el delirio. Compresas de agua frรญa, era lo รบnico disponible. [. . .]
Comenzรณ una larga convalecencia. Hanรกn se recuperรณ pronto; Dana, de ojos hundidos y piel transparente, le costรณ volver a caminar.
–Conseguรญ miel. Pan negro con miel te darรก vigor. Hay que raptarte la cabeza, todos lo hacen despuรฉs del tifus; asรญ crece el pelo mรกs sano y tupido.
–ยกNo, no quiero! Papรก, por favor, ยกno! โ se defendiรณ Dana.
El tacto espinoso del crรกneo, le quedarรญa eternamente pegado a las yemas de los dedos; el pelo demorรณ siglos en crecer. El hecho de que muchos anduviesen rapados en el guetto de Moguilev, no aliviaba en absoluto la angustia ni la humillaciรณn. Era como estar marcada, fuera de la estrella amarilla obligatoria, los rapados, los salvados de tifus.
El minรบsculo espejo de la dentista muerta mostraba una imagen fea; irremediablemente fea. [. . .]
Me gustarรญa tanto saber lo que pasa en tu pequeรฑo cerebro. Quรฉ de pensamientos, quรฉ de reproches, quรฉ de juzgar tan severo. Sรญ, tรบ eres mi tribunal implacable y mรกs despiadado. Mi bella hija, para el deleite de otros ojos .[. . .]
Escapar: que termine; vislumbrar un fin tan utรณpico como desprenderse de la propia sombra. No, no habรญa indicios, apoyos, signos, la nada absoluta invadรญa el horizonte. Muros insalvables de incertidumbre acorralado y oprimiendo, aumentando la angustia. En el impecable cielo azul. En cuyo espesor Dios se habรญa desintegrado, quedaban estrellas y sueรฑos bordados con hilos de polvo dorado.[. . .]
–Ha llegado a Moguilev el delegado de la Cruz Roja Internacional, el seรฑor Charles Kolbโinformรณ Hanan, entrando en la calleโpretende prestar ayuda a los deportados. Ofreciรณ a quienes tienen parientes en las Amรฉricas, transmitir misivas muy cortas: cuatro, cinco palabras, no mรกs.
NOUS MOURONS DE FAIM, DANA. La direcciรณn (de su madre), la recordaba muy bien: Plaza รuรฑoa 19, Santiago de Chile. [. . .]
Hacia fines de 1943, los sobrevivientes de esta deplorable migraciรณn eran 78.000 de los 200.000 deportados a Ucrania en 1941. Conferencia XVII del Comitรฉ Internacional de la Cruz Roja. โStockholm, agosto de 1948.
Tercera Parte
RETORNO octubre 1943
Una orden al comandante de la guarniciรณn: Preparar las formalidades para el traslado de Dana I., ciudadana argentina, hacia Bucarest. El permiso de salida del guetto Moguilev, firmado por el mismo General Atonescu, habรญa llegado anoche.[. . .]
Como un terremoto en dรญa claro. Dana no pensรณ, invadida de emociรณn, todo se desplazรณ, se volcรณ, sรญ, alegrรญa, futuro. . . Peligros, sรญ, salir, correr y obliterar el pasado; pronto, ahora, al instante. El horizonte por fin se deslumbrรณ, desconocido, confuso, pero existente. [. . .]
De madrugada, en la calle desierta, quedรณ recortada y grabada la silueta de su padre, cuyos ojos brillosos rehusaban admitir la separaciรณn; acaso el รบltimo adiรณs, mientras el vehรญculo militar avanzaba pesadamente hacia el reconstruido puente sobre el rรญo Dniester.[. . .]
Vรฉrtigos, superarlos y controlarlos; idiomas en desuso, rescatarlos, aplicarlos; cรณdigos nuevos, adaptarlos, asumirlos. . . Dana terminaba el dรญa agobiada, con migrena persistente.[. . .]
El Nuncio hizo las gestiones pertinentes: las monjas francesas de Notre Dame de Sion (en Bucarest) se harรกn cargo de su educaciรณn. Es un colegio particular de niรฑas, con muy buen internado. Allรญ permanecerรก hasta nuevas instrucciones.[. . .]
ยกLa euforia me invade! ยกVives! [. . .}
Noviembre 1947
Aeropuerto, Santiago de Chile, 1948
Distingo la silueta, ahรญ estรกs, lejos, con tu maleta en el suelo. Sรญ, eres tรบ, buscรกndome en la mirada, aรบn no me ves, a pesar de mis seรฑas, porque todos hacen seรฑas. Vinieron en busca de alguien, con rostros sonrientes. Yo, aquรญ parada, once aรฑos, con mejillas hรบmedas, aunque prometรญ no llorar; mi mente turbada. Se diluyen los recuerdos: estรกs tรบ y tu rostro, tu cuerpo del mรญo, tus lรกgrimas, se funden en las mรญas, empaรฑan la vista, siento los latidos, el pestaรฑear y los sollozos ahogados. . .El ayer sellado junto al hoy cambiante, mirรกndonos; buscaremos juntas, respuestas que no siempre hallaremos.
November 1947
Going down the steps from the plane, he didnโt hurry her pace; gain five minutes, eternity. . .not seeing her yet, the first word, perhaps the hug.
She made out her at customs, behind the glassed-in parameter, tall, grayed hair, smoked up eyeglasses, shaking her am toward the public. Then would come the tears, the furtive kisses. A tangle of emotions, mute, tactile; the two, perhaps, intertwined, dissipating accumulated rancor. [. . .]
How can it be that suddenly, a voyage in a ship? Dana was amazed while she tried on the silk dress, sky-blue with white appliquรฉ. Papa agreed to buying her the dress, no more asking. Who nice! To try on and try on. For they left the house with a hand bang, without any luggage.
โIt looks pretty on your,โ smiled the saleslady, โItโs the color of your eyes. A small coat, perhaps, blue with golden buttons.
Yes, of course, the afternoons are cool and we will be at sea for a month.[โฆ]
The English ship seemed enormous to her, with multiple decks at different levels, all brand new, brand new in the picture. Orapesa, what a strange name. Dana imagined lingotes and more lingotes of gold in it deepest holds, lined up like her brother Chepaโs little lead soldiers.
Papa, let me have the top bed, so, I will be just in front of the round window. Look, look how the birds are flying around the ship. Will they accompany us for the entire trip?โ
โWe donโt know yet. [โฆ]
–Ana ven, ha ocurrido algo terrible. Recibรญ un telegrama. Estรกnen un barco, fuera de las aguas territoriales. ยกAna, se robรณ a la niรฑa!
Lo recuerdo todo, porque el tiempo no borra, acaso ni mitiga ,ni eso. Quiero que tรบ sepas mi verdad, aunque no sรฉ si algรบn dรญa te mostrarรฉ porque el daรฑo estรก hecho y vidas no se hacen como los tejidos a palillos. . .[. . .]
Tratรฉ explicarle: –No se me atrevรญ a confesรกrtelo por cobarde, por temores. . . procura comprenderme, no puedo mentirte mรกs.
ยฟTratar de comprenderte? ยฟDe quรฉ estรก hablando? Me destrozas con un cuchillo filoso, hundido sin piedad en lo vivo. ยฟTania, por quรฉ? ยกCinco aรฑos compartidos!
Yo no abarcaba todavรญa la magnitud del desastre. Hablรณ de dejar la casa. En ningรบn momento sospechรฉ la venganza que preparaba[. . .]
–Jamรกs se debe reconocer infidelidades; un amante es pasajero por definiciรณn Se habrรญa acabado en unos aรฑos mรกs, sin ocurrencias, Tania, hay cosas, que un marido no tiene para quรฉ saberlas [. . .]
Le engaรฑรฉ largo tiempo; fue inevitable, porque hubiese sido como querer detener una cascada: mi pasiรณn era la vida misma, el fuego y el mar, ยฟCรณmo hubiese podido renunciar? Tania, ยกUna simple mortal![. . .]
I remember everything. Because time doesnโt erase, perhaps not even mitigate, not that. OI want you to know my truth, although I donโt know if some day I will show you because the damage is done and lives arenโt made like a weaving of toothpicks.[. . .]
“I tried to explain it to her. . .โI didnโt try everything to you, as a coward, for fearsโฆtry to understand me, I canโt lie to you anymore.“
“Try to understand you?โ What are you talking about? You destroy me with a sharp knife, plunged, without remorse in the living. Tania, whyโ Five years shared.
“I canโt get my arms around the magnitude of the disaster. He spoke of leaving home. At no time did I suspect the vengeance that was prepared.”.[. . .]
“You should never pay attention to infidelities; a lover is a passerby by definition. It would have ended in a few more years, without trouble, Tania, there are some things, that a husband doesnโt need to know.[. . .]“
“I deceived him for a long time, it was inevitable, because it would have been like wanting to stop a waterfall: my passion was like itself, the fire and the sea, how could I have stopped? Tania, a simple mortal!โ
Septiembre 1937
Golda didnโt have children; Fani had died a few months before. Everything in the entire house-estate gave off the odor of shrouds; it could be said, correctly, that death lived in every corner, piece of furniture and adornment. She was spoken of endlessly, at the meals, on awakening; at night shouts of anguish were heard: Fani, Fani.
Dana saw the photographs of Fani, spread around the all the rooms, framed and hung on the walls, separate, of different sizes, on the furniture. The penetrating face from beyond the grave pursued her, she tried to cross her hands like the dead woman, to smile with the ends of lips pointing down; she didnโt do it[ she couldnโt copy the hairstyle either. [. . .] on the contrary, only if she were brought back to life, would there be salvation; but Dana knew that, apart from Jesus Christ, nobody had come back
Fani, brilliant, good and beautiful was better than all and unreachable. Dania hated her, a sterile hate; the worst she could do is wish for an enemyโdeathโdidnโt fit that description. . .on the contrary, only if she were to come back to like, could there be salvation, but Dana knew that, apart from Jesus Christ, no one had come back. Never, even trying hard, will she, not even remotely, look like the dead woman.[. . .]
For Golda, who proposed to Hanรกn the idea of going to America to live with them, the uncle disagreed. Why sell off everything? Get divorced here and remake your life without returning to Hotรญn. The uncle wasnโt in too much pain, the timbre of a childโs voice bothered him, the running, he didnโt want to be of interest to the police once more, he couldnโt [. . .]
Segunda parte
Storm June 1941
My daughter, the news in the papers shocks me: the wa ris coming close to your zone, your father, will they bring him to the frontโ What fear. You, at least, will stay safe with your aunts and uncles.
The deafening noise of the motors woke Dana; she ran to the window: โI could distinguish the pilots with their glasses and their black caps.โ She heard shots and bombs drop[. . .]The distant war, thing of the newspapers and radio reports, had arrived, it was heard, touched.[. . .]
The appointed day having arrived, the rounded up the Jews of Hotรญn in the esplanade in front of the market, where the peasants parked on holidays, with their sheep and cattle. There were thousands of deportees, women, children, children, surrounded in a cloud of mystery: โWhy are they throwing us out, what is our sin? Tonight, where will we sleep? Will we get out of this alive? Have the soldiers gone crazy.โ They confused crime with madness.
The deportees were advancing slowly, distressed, listening for the armed Rumanian soldiers, with full powers to abuse, wound, kill. [. . .]
The first victim, a nine-month-old little girl, died, suffocated by the gear. The mother: โPerhaps God took her away from me before she suffered more; instead of crying, I should be thankful. [. . .]
โSomething walked over my head,โ Dana wondered. โAnts?โ
If only they had been ants: they were lice. An invasion of lice, yellowed, disgusting, with eggs adhering perfidiously to the hairs; there was no way to get free from then. Disgust with herself: to pull herself out, to flee, without having a where or a how.[. . .]
They could spot the Dniester River; near to the pier, could be seen a destroyed bridge, dynamited by the Russians as they retreated; it would be months until the Germans began to construct a new one with the forced labor of the deportees.{. . .]
The hour came for continuing toward the other side of the Dienster River, and they would pass hidden by the earlier tumult. The raft slid slowly, softly, toward the new chaotic detour of their lives [. . .]
The children didnโt cease their heartrending crying, the murmuring of the perplexed adults followed: โto where? Why?โ Dust, lifted by the wind, stuck to their noses, skin, clothing, sweating bodies.[. . .] It began to get dark, the moon appeared, distressed.
The first night of her life in the inhospitable outdoors; fatigue didnโt allow for reasoning, only the primary sensorial necessities were important: heat, cold, hunger, pain.[. . .] Later, much later, Danaโs strength was failing.
With the dawn, the soldiers renewed the forced march, led, like a herd of cattle, yelling, whiplashes. โI canโt go anymore! I have broken blisters on the other foot, it hurts so much.[. .. .]
Soldiers of the Romanian Army, 1944
Now it is night there, while you are sleeping on your pillow. Do you remember me in your dreams? How much I would love you![. . .]
My daughter, your hatred, I feel it; it crosses continents, seas and oceans, it penetrates in all my pores.[. . .]
Simultaneously, they caught tick-born typhus : father and daughter lay in the large room. Katia, taking care of them. Very high fever. Dana felt palpitations in her head, lost in the feelings of delirium. Compresses of cold water, it was the only thing available.[. . .]
The long convalescence began. Hanรกn quickly recovered; Dana, with sunken eyes and transparent skin, it was hard for her to walk again.
โI got hold of some honey. Black bread with honey will give you strength; itโs necessary to shave your head; so that the hair grows back health and thick.
โNo, I donโt want to! Papa, no, please! โ Dana defended herself.
The spiny touch of the skull would be eternally be stuck to her finger tips; the hair took centuries to grow back. The fac that many walked with shaved heads in the Moquilev ghetto, didnโt alleviate in the slightest the anguish and the pain. I was like being marked, beyond the obligatory yellow star, the shaved ones, those saved from typhus.
The miniscule mirror from the dead dentist showed an ugly image, irremediably ugly. [. . . ]
โI would so much like to know what is happening in your little head. What thoughts, what reproaches, what of judging so severely. If you are my implacable and most dismissive tribunal. My beautiful daughter, for the delight of other eyes. [. . .]
To escape: let it end: to glimpse an end so utopic as detaching her won shadow. No, there were no signs, hints, supports, signs, the absolutely nothing on the horizon. insolvable walls of uncertainty, locked up and oppressed, augmenting the anguish. In the impeccable blue sky. In whose thickness, God had disintegrated; there were dreams embroidered with threads of golden dust.
โThe delegate of the International Red cross, Mr. Charles Kolb has arrived at Moguilev,โ Hanรกn imformed them, entering the streetโHe intends to give help to the deportees. He offered to those who have relatives in the Americas, to transmit very short missives: four, five words, no more.
NOUS MOURINS DE FAIM, DANA, the address of her mother, she remembered it quite well: Plaza รunu, Santiago de chile. [.. .]
Toward the ends of 1943, the survivors of this deplorable migration were 79,000 of the 200.000 deported to th Ukraine in 1941, Conference of XVII of the International Red Cross. Stockholm, August, 1948.
The โdelegate of the International Red cross, Mr. Charles Kolb has arrived at Moguilev,โ Hanรกn imformed them, entering the streetโHe intends to give help to the deportees. He offered to those who have relatives in the Americas, to transmit very short missives: four, five words, no more.
NOUS MOURINS DE FAIM, DANA, the address of her mother, she remembered it quite well: Plaza รunu, Santiago de chile. [.. .]
Toward the ends of 1943, the survivors of this deplorable migration were 79,000 of the 200.000 deported to the Ukraine in 1941, Conference of XVII of the International Red Cross. Stockholm, August, 1948.
Vertigos, overcome them and control them: languages in disuse, save them, apply them: new codes of behavior, adapt them, assume them. . .Dana ended the day exhausted, with a persistent migraine.{. . .]
The Nuncio took care of the necessary details: the French nuns of Notre Dame of Sion (Bucharest) will take charge of her education. It is a private school for girls, with a very good boarding school. She will stay there until new instructions.[. . .]
ยกThe euphoria invades me! ยกYou are alive!
Airport of Santiago de Chile, 1948
Al bajar las escalinatas del aviรณn, no apresurรณ el paso; ganara otros minutos, la eternidad. . .no verla todavรญa, la primera palabra, acaso el abrazo.
La divisรณ desde la aduana, detrรกs del parรกmetro vidriado; alta, canosa, anteojos ahumados, agitando un brazo entre el pรบblico. Luego vendrรญan las lรกgrimas, los besos furtivos. Una maraรฑa de emociones, mudas, tรกctiles; las dos, tal vez, entrelazadas, disipando rencores acumulados.[. . .]
I distinguish the silouette, there you are, far away, with your suitcase on the floor. Yes, it is you, looking for my face, you still donโt see me, in spite of my signals. The come looking for someone. Wit smiling faces. I, standing here, eleven years, with damp cheeks, although I promised not to cry, my mind disturbed. The memories become diluted: you are here and your face, your body from mine, your tears, they merge into mine, mist up sight, I feel the heartbeats, the blinking and the stifled sighs. . .The yesterday closed together with the changing today, looking at each other, we sill search together, answers that we wonโt always find.
Davld Keidar, alias “El indio”, naciรณ como David Kaplan en Concordia, Entre Rรญos, Argentina, en 1939. Pasรณ su infancia en la Colonia Vila hasta los 12 aรฑos de edad. Emigrรณ a Israel en 1960, como integrante del movimiento juvenil Ijud Hanoar Hahaluzi. Desde entonces, vive en el kibutz Nir Am en el sur de Israel. Casado y con cuatro hijos, ha trabajado la mayor parte de su vida en el campo. Durante su juventud escribiรณ en espaรฑol cuentos y poemas. A los 48 aรฑos, despuรฉs de estudiar Geografรญa e Historia en Israel, comenzรณ a escribir en hebreo y publicรณ dos libros en la editorial Sifriat Poalim, de Israel, seรฑalado รฉxito de crรญtica. El primero de ellos, Colonia Vila, apareciรณ en espaรฑol en 1990. Entre otras distinciones, ganรณ Concurso Internacional de Cuentos, organizado por Casa Argentina en Israel–Tierra Santa con su relato “Tambores en el valle calchaqui.
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Davld Keidar, alias “El Indio”, was born as David Kaplan in Concordia, Entre Rรญos, Argentina, in 1939. He spent his childhood in Colonia Vila until he was 12 years old. He immigrated to Israel in 1960 as a member of the Ijud Hanoar Hahaluzi youth movement. Since then, he has lived in Kibbutz Nir Am in southern Israel. Married with four children, he has worked most of his life in the fields. During his youth he wrote stories and poems in Spanish. At the age of 48, after studying Geography and History in Israel, he began to write in Hebrew and published two books in Israel’s Sifriat Poalim publishing house, a noted critical success. The first of them, Colonia Vila, appeared in Spanish in 1990. Among other distinctions, it won the International Short Story Contest, organized by Casa Argentina in Israel – Tierra Santa with its story “Drums in the Calchaqui Valley.
De:/From: David Keidar. Relatos de Pago Chico. Buenos Aires: Acervo Cultural, 1999. pp. 65-70.
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โHecha la ley, hecha la trampaโ
Estamos sitiados por unas de esas tormentas de arena que construye mรฉdanos en los lentes. Los rosales, las claves y las enredaderas estรกn uniformados por el desierto,โ . . .ese fantasma que marchita de golpe cualquier cosaโ.
Voy a lo de รrnon, alias โel Berenjenaโ. A propรณsito de apodo: en la รฉpoca del Baรฑo Colectivoโpues no habรญa casa con baรฑo en Pago Chico en los comienzosโle vieron unos testรญculos desmesurados de Arnรณn. . .
El Berenjena contesta a mi pregunta, de cรณmo pasaron todas esas horribles dificultades del principio, en Pago Chico. Cรณmo fue que llevaron a cabo cualquier tarea con tanta ilusiรณn.
โPorque aprovechamos esa libertad de hacer de todo. Sin pedir indulgencia. Sรญ, superamos todo tabรบ porque mamรก y papรก no estaban; porque dejamos los mandamientos en la buhardilla. Y porque creamos nuevos valores. Nuestros valoresโ
Le dije, que a mi parecer, esos valores uno los adapta cuando es inmigrante, pero cuando ya se es ciudadano, como cualquier nativo, no los precisa.
โEl error es pensar asรญโnosotros no venimos sรณlo a ser ciudadanos, sino a crear nuevos ciudadanos, para eso estรกbamos armados de ideologรญa. Bueno, hoy la ideologรญa pasa por una mala racha. . .
โ โTenรฉs razรณn, pero a las ocasiones no hay que dejarlas pasar. A pesar que nos enfrentamos con los aรฑos difรญciles de la guerra mundial, con la opresiรณn britรกnica y con el odio de los รกrabes, venimos decididos y armados de fe. . .(cosa que hoy hay sรณlo en las sinagogas). La fe laica es, a veces, mรกs peligrosa que la religiosaโ.
โCierto por eso triunfamosโโme contesta El Berenjena.
โLos religiosos creen en la vida mรกgica del mรกs allรก, nosotros en la de aquรญ. . .ยกy peleamos por ella!โ
En la quebradiza primavera del โ40 que nos tendiรณ la trampa, Rebeca me mirรณ con sus grandes ojosโme dice El Berenjenaโy ni me vio. Pasรณ de largo, posada como un maniquรญ de vidriera, patinando sobre el lago helado de Odesa. La guerra ya se olรญa en cualquier parte, y advertรญamos que iba s ser difรญcil zafarse.
โNo hay nada que hacer: todos mis pensamientos eran un tormento que llevaba al infierno. Sรญ, sin Rebeca, todo era un infierno. . .โ
El Berenjena calla, cabizbajoโyo trato de crear conversaciรณnโy le pregunto por Rebeca, por la guerra. El Berenjena sale de su ausencia, y dice:
โLa gente joven, que se podรญa desprender de los prejuicios y de la familia, aprovechรณ cualquier oportunidad.
Nuestro Movimiento Juvenil recibiรณ, por esos caminos llenos de vericuetos burocrรกticos (con su coima de rigor. . .) uno de esos codiciados permisos para emigra a Palestina (Certificado del Mandato Britรกnico para controlar la inmigraciรณn). La autorizaciรณn era personal o para una pareja. No lo vas a creer, pero la fe puse en el metejรณn con Rebeca, mรกs la desesperaciรณn de ella de encontrar a su amado de su adolesencia, que estaba ya a salvo en Palestina, se fusionaron por orden del Movimiento en un Certificado. . .Para aumentar la cuota de inmigrantes, se organizaban casamientos ficticios. Hecha la ley, hecha la trampa.
Un rabino especial efectuaba allรญ el rito, y otro aquรญ, se legalizaba el divorcio. Ella se me esfumรณ entre los dedos y yo cerrรฉ la angustia en mi puรฑo.
Fue una cruel bofetada, de esas que no dejan marca en la mejilla, pero deja una cicatriz en la memoria.
Las grandes ideas, las grandes decisiones nacen, por ahรญ en la รฉpoca veinteaรฑera, antes de la madurez, antes del miedo a la consecuencias. . .
Practicรกbamos el amor platรณnico, la limpieza moral y sexual y la austeridad. Vivรญamos en puro contraste con la sociedad judรญa de los barrios residenciales, esos de avenidas y jardines, Corrรญa la รฉpoca de la inseguridad. Habรญa tantas ideas en boga para salvar al mundo como para reventarlo, y todos solucionaban la humanidad con regularidad y certeza casi matemรกtica.
Ahรญ fue que naciรณ nuestra rebeliรณn.
En medio de la selva, nadie cede, y opta por el todo o nada.
Ahรญ fue creamos un nuevo mundo de valores sensibles.
Bueno, el asunto no es sรณlo crearlo, sino vivirlo en actitudes diarias. . .
Nuestro mundo era vรกlido sin ambiciones personales, era un mundo de sacrificio, estoico por propia decisiรณn. Era, como el mundo de las Cruzados, para salvar la Tierra Santa de los Herejes. . .un mundo de todo o nadaโ.
El Berenjenaโaรบn hoyโestรก asido a la creaciรณn del Nuevo Hombre, y no le molesta la falta maloliente de libre albedrรญo. Hasta hoy, pluraliza su โyoโ. . .sรณlo el dolor lo singulariza, a veces.
โTodo descendiente de inmigrantesโโme dice El Berenjena–;lo primero que busca es mejorar su situaciรณn. . .como soldado de lรญnea que busca la mejor trinchera frente al fuego enemigoโ>
Escribรญ bien estas lรญneas: La nueva generaciรณn cortรณ su cordรณn umbilicalโme dice El Berenjena–. Hay que evitar que esa gente nueva aniquile lo que hicimos. . .por que lo menos sobreviva en el papel.
Y yo pienso: estos viejos se nos rebelan, aferrados a sus ideas de antaรฑo. . .creo que la idea los alejรณ de la vida, esa gran idea que los obligรณ a abdicar, a mezquinar y sufrir (aunque no saben que sufrieron. . .) porque asรญ lo decidieron.
El Berenjena se me enfurece y dice: โ Nadie nos obligรณ a decidir, las experiencias fueron nuestras, y no fuimos las hojas muertas que contemplan la tormenta. Cierto, las dificultades estorban la vida, pero a su vez, son necesarias para vivir, en especial cuando la violencia y la ambiciรณn estรกn ausentesโ.
โBueno, eso es como hacer un cรญrculo en el aire con el dedo y decir โesto soy yoโ, le digo. . .y se ofende, creo.
โBueno, bueno, tambiรฉn con el dedo se hace un cรญrculo para sacar la nata de la olla,โ me dice burlรกndose.
Mientras estamos apoltronados frente a la televisiรณn, con el aire acondicionado, suena el campanita de la microondas y las masitas estรกn listas para el cafรฉ.
โPara ustedesโme dice El Berenjenaโtodo esto tiene valor, para nosotros, apenas es corteza de algรบn valor. . .se puede comprar en cualquier parte. Nuestras igualdad y ayuda mutua, noโ.
Se irrita y me dice: โustedes han tirado todo al cesto de paja, como se tiran viejos utensilios domรฉsticos. Sin los utensilios nuevos, ustedes apenas son una sequรญa, volverรกn a ser desarraigados. . .si les desenchufamos los artefactos elรฉctricas. . .ยฟquรฉ serรก de ustedes?โ
Se irrita y se sofoca.
Se irrita mรกs cuando le insinuรณ la foto de su Rebeca. Esa es la zona mรกs รกrida de la memoria que no quiere recordar. Su calor humano se ve esfumando, y entiendo que lo mejor es este momento, es beber el cafรฉ que me ofrece. Estoy esperando que tome contacto y perspectiva con el pasado. Estoy esperando que se desprenda del sacrificio de los รญdolos. Despuรฉs de unos sorbos, se repliega, y veo en sus ojos como Rebeca se va despertando de un letargo: y El Berenjena la mira, como si saliese en este momento en traje de baรฑo, y se la imagina, desperezรกndo delante de รฉl.
La Rebeca estรก ahรญ, con un poco de sombra debajo de los ojos, decidida, agarrando con firmeza el marco de su foto, mirando lejos a la costa imaginaria, Se ve en la foto la cola negra de un nube de hollรญn, tan negra que parece una nube fangosa.
Ella insinรบa una sonrisa: no era nada divertido navegar sin rumbo, pero era sรญ divertido aventurarse en yunta con El Berenjena.
Quiero preguntar, pero El Berenjena me hace callar con su voz remilgada, lucha con su memoria, y, como para satisfacer mi necesidad dice: โLa amรฉ mรกs que nunca, como a nadie la amรฉ, tres semanas. . . y llegamos a la culminaciรณn del amor. Cuando pisamos tierra firme lo supe: mi amor naufragรณ, se esfumรณ por orden a las reglas y los compromisos โpatriรณticosโ.
โNunca pude perdonar a esa patria. Yo creรญa en lo que estaba haciendoโ.
โEspero que me entiendasโ, dijo Rebeca. รl asintiรณ con lรกgrimas.
โEsa es la maldita verdadโ.
Hace una pausa y quiere mirar el cielorraso. โNo era no soy testarudo, sรฉ y sabรญa cuรกl era mi rol; esa es la desgracia, saber el papelโ.
โEra la fachada patriรณtica que presentamos al mundo, y adentro el dolor nos devoraba las tripas. . Sรญ, la idea nos abrumรณ la cabeza.โ
En el 48, en el 49, en el 56, despuรฉs de las acciones bรฉlicas leรญa รกvido en los distintos idiomas de los distintos periรณdicos. . .albergando la negra esperanza de que la Rebeca enviudase.
Pero no, Rebeca nunca entrรณ en ese castillo lรบgubre que El Berenjena erigiรณ. Noche a noche รฉl recibรญa ese castigo de pesadillas noche a noche. Asรญ fue que el destino le negรณ los deseos. . .y los fantasmas lo acechaban en los espejos deformados de sus anhelos.
Pero no hay nada que hacer, los que se sacrificaron por la patria, fueron โla patriaโ. y brillaron como astros; que se quemaron y reventaron como chispas alimentadas por las brasas.
Fue asรญ que despuรฉs de cuatro guerras y mรกs de medio siglo, El Berenjena rodeado por las arenas del desierto, levantรณ su castillito de esperanza.
Asรญ pasรณ medio siglo de altibajos, de aciertos y de fracasos. Correteando tras espejismos, atrapando efรญmeros momentos que llamรณ โfelicidadโ. A veces el cariรฑo por la Rebeca caรญa en el letargo, a veces se hundรญa en la nostalgia melancรณlica. . .pero รฉl sabรญa que en algรบn rincรณn estaba todo latente.
La cicatriz lo delataba, esa cicatriz que fue corriendo por la ondulada monotonรญa diaria,
Se despertรณ con la viudez. Se despertรณ como un manantial inagotable en el desierto, que un viento recio libera de la esclavitud de los arenales.
โAntaรฑo, cuando era hombre maduro y fuerte, podรญa correr todos los riesgosโโme decรญa El Berenjenaโโahora apenas tengo fuerzas para rescatarme a mรญ mismo. . โ.
Despuรฉs de mรกs de medio siglo, despuรฉs de cuatro guerras, y antes que el Pago Chico se le borre, El Berenjena que ya es viudo, la encuentra a la Rebeca que tambiรฉn es viuda.
Ahora los veo.
El va tan agachado, detrรกs de la silla de ruedas de su Rebeca, como cuando querรญa corretear tras ella hace medio siglo atrรกs. . .en la quebrada primavera del โ40.
Hasta se pone contento como un niรฑo que goza el premio pretendido hace tantos aรฑos.
______________________________________
David Keidar
_______________________________________
“Every Law has a Loophole”
We are being besieged by one of those sandstorms that build dunes on your glasses. The rose bushes, the carnations and the morning-glories are uniformed by the desert. . . โthat ghost that suddenly dries up anything.”
I am going to see Arnรณn, alias The Eggplant.โ The nickname: in the times of the Collective Bathโas there was no house with a bathroom in the early daysโthey saw รrnonโs enormous testicles. . .
The Eggplant answers my question, of how they got through the horrible difficulties at the beginning, in Pago Chico. How was it that they were able to accomplish whatever task with so much hope.
โBecause we took advantage of that freedom to do everything. Without asking permission. Yes, we broke every taboo because mama and papa were not around; because we left the commandments in the in the closet. And because we created new values. Our values.โ
I told him, that in my opinion, you adopt those values when you are an immigrant, but when you are a citizen, like any other native, you donโt need them. โThe mistake is to think like thatโwe didnโt come to be citizens only, but to create new citizens, for that we were armed with ideology. Well, now the ideology is passing through a bad spell. . .โ
“You are right, but there are times when you donโt have to let them PASAR. Even though we faced the difficult years of the World War, with the British oppression and the hatred of Arabs, we came determined and armed with faith. . .(something that today is only in the synagogue). The secular faith, is at times, more dangerous than the religious.”
“Surely for that reason, we triumphed,”The Eggplant answered me. The religious believe in the magical life in the nest world, we in that which is here. . .and we fought for it!
In the fragile Spring of 1940, that set the trap for us, Rebeca looked at me with her large eyesโThe Eggplant told meโand didnโt even see me. She passed at some distance, posed like a glass manaquin, ice-skating on the frozen lake in Odessa. The war could already be smelled everywhere, and we feared it was going to be difficult to escape.
Nothing can be done: all my thoughts were like a storm that led to an inferno. Yes, without Rebeca, everything was an inferno. . .
The Eggplant became quiet, head downโI tried to make conversationโand I ask him about Rebeca, about the war. The Eggplant comes out of his distraction and says:
‘The young people, who could shed the prejudices and the family, took advantage of any opportunity.
Our Youth Movement received, through those paths full of bureaucratic twists and turns (with its required bribes. . ) one of those coveted permits for immigration to Palestine (Certificate of the British Mandate to control immigration.) The authorization was for one person or for a married couple. You wonโt believe it, but the faith I put in the intense love for Rebeca, plus her desperation to a find her adolescent lover, who was already safe in Palestine, were fused by order of the Movement in one Certificate. . .To raise the quota of immigrants, they organized fictitious marriages. HECHA LA LEY, HECHA LA TRAMPA.
“A special rabbi carried out the rite, an another, here, legalized the divorce. She slipped through my fingers sand I clenched my anguish in my fist.”
“It was a cruel blow, of those that donโt leave a mark on the cheek, but leaves a scar in the memory.”
“The great ideas, the great decisions are born, in the twenties, before maturity, before the fear of the consequences.” .
“We practiced platonic love, moral and sexual cleanliness and austerity. We lived in complete contrast to the Jewish society of the residential neighborhoods, those of avenues and gardens. The period of insecurity was moving quickly. There were so many ideas in vogue to save the world in order to blow it up, and everyone solved humanity with the regularity and certainty almost mathematical.”
“There it was that our rebellion was born.
In the middle of the jungle, nobody gives in and opts for everything or nothing.
There it was that we created a new world of sensible values.
Well, the issue is not only to create it, but to live it with constant attitudes.”
Our world was valid without personal ambitions, it was a life of sacrifice, stoic by oneโs on decision. It was, like the world of the Crusades, to save the Holy Land from the Heretics. . .a world of everything or nothing.”
The Eggplantโeven now is attached to the idea of the creation of the New Man, and the ill-smelling lack of free will. Even now, he pluralizes the โIโ. . . he only, speaks of pain in the singular, one in a while.
“Every descendent of immigrant”โThe Eggplant tells meโ”the first thing that he seeks is to improve his situation. . .like a frontline soldier who seeks the best trench against enemy fire.”
I write these lines down carefully: the new generation cut its umbilical cordโThe Eggplant says to me–. “It is necessary to keep those new people from completely destroying what we did, at least that it remains on paper.”
And I think: these old folk rebel against us, clinging to their ideas from yesterday. . .I believe that the idea distances them from life, that great idea the obliged them to abdicate, to skimp and suffer (although they didnโt know they were suffering) because the decided to do so.
The Eggplant became furious with me and je said: no one obliged us to decide, the experiences were ours, and we werenโt dry leaves that that contemplate the storm. For sure, the difficulties hindered life, but at the same time, they are necessary for life, especially when violence and ambition are absent.
” Well, this is like making a circle in in the air with your finger and saying ‘I am this,'” I told him, and he was offended, I think.
“Sure, sure, with your finger you can make a circle to take the cream from the pot”โhe said jokingly.
While we are lounging around in front of the television, with air conditioning, the little bell of the microwave and the pastries are ready for the coffee.
“For all of you”โThe Eggplant says to meโ”all this has value, for us, it is hardly the crust of some value, , ,you can buy anywhere. For us, equality and mutual aid.”
He is irritated and he says to me: “you have thrown away the entire straw basket, like you throw out old domestic utensils. Without the new utensils, you are hardly are a drought, you become disorganized. . .if we unplug the electric artefacts. . what will become of you.”
He is irritated and he annoyed.
He is more irritated when I mention to him the photograph of Rebeca. That is the most arid zone of his memory that he doesnโt want to remember. His human warmth faded from him, and I understand that this is the best thing to do in this moment is to drink the coffee that he offers me. I am waiting for him to make contact and give a perspective of the past. I am waiting for him to detach himself from the sacrifices of his idols. After a few sips, he becomes withdrawn, and I see in his eyes how Rebeca is awaking from a lethargy: and The Eggplant looks at her, as if, in this moment, she was wearing a bathing suit, stretching in front of him.
He is more irritated when I mention to him the photograph of Rebeca. That is the most arid zone of his memory that he doesnโt want to remember. His human warmth faded from him, and I understand that this is the best thing to do in this moment is to drink the coffee that he offers me. I am waiting for him to make contact and give a perspective of the past. I am waiting for him to detach himself from the sacrifices of his idols. After a few sips, he becomes withdrawn, and I see in his eyes how Rebeca is awaking from a lethargy: and The Eggplant looks at her, as if, in this moment, she was wearing a bathing suit, stretching in front of him.
The Rebeca is there, with a bit of shade below her eyes, determined, holding firmly to the frame if her photo looking far away at an imaginary coastline. You see in the photo the black tail of a cloud of soot, so black that it looks like a muddy cloud. She hints a smile: it wasnโt any fun at all to navigate without direction but is was fun to go forward yoked to The Eggplant.
I want to ask, but The Eggplant, with his finicky voice, made me keep quiet, he fights with his memory, and as if to satisfy my needs, he says: I loved more than ever, I loved her more than anyone, three weeks. . .and we reached the culmination of our love. When we stepped on tierra firma , I knew: my love was shipwrecked, it blew away because of the โpatrioticโ rules and agreements. I could never pardon that homeland. I believed in what I was doing.
โI hope you understand me,โ said Rebeca. He agreed in tears.
“That is the damn truth.”
He pauses and then wants to look at the ceiling. “I wasnโt nor am I stubborn, I know and I knew what my role was; that is the misfortune, to know your role.โ
“It was the patriotic faรงade that we presented to the word, and inside the pain devoured our guts. . .Yes, the idea overwhelmed our heads,”
In the โ48, in the โ49, in the โ56, after the wars, I avidly read, in the different languages in different newspapers. . . harboring the black hope that Rebeca had become a widow.
But no, Rebeca never entered that melancholy castle that The Eggplant erected. Night after night, he received that punishment night after night. There it was that destiny denied his desires. . .and the ghosts punished him with the deformed mirrors of his desires.
But there is nothing that can be done, those that sacrificed themselves for the homeland, were โthe homelandโ and shined like stars, and burnt themselves up and exploded like sparks fed by the coals.
It was so, that after four wars and more than half a century, The Eggplant, surrounded by the sands of the desert, built his little castle of hope.
And so passed half a century of ups and downs, of successes and failures. Courting mirages, trapping fleeting moments that he called โhappiness.โ At times his affection for The Rebeca fell into lethargy, at times it sunk into melancholy nostalgia. . .but he knew that in some corner everything was latent.
The scar betrayed him, that scar that was running through the undulating daily boredom.
He awoke as a widower. He woke up like an inexhaustible fountain, that a fierce wind free him from the slavery of the sands.
Much earlier, when he was a mature and strong man, he could take on all risks, The Eggplant told meโ”now I scarcely have the strength to rescue myself. . .”
After half a century, after four wars, and before Pago Chico faded away from him, The Eggplant is already a widower; he finds Rebeca who also is a widow.
Now I see them.
He goes on so stooped, behind the wheelchair of his Rebeca, just like he wanted to court her a half a century ago. . .in the broken Spring of โ40.
He even became as happy as a child who enjoys the prize sought after so many years.
Hรฉctor Yรกnover naciรณ en Alta Gracia, Cรณrdoba, Argentina en 1929. Fue poeta y librero. Como tal, se convirtiรณ en una fuente de referencias quizรกs รบnica en la Argentina de hoy. Cada vez que alguien querรญa obtener un dato bibliogrรกfico o encontrar un libro descatalogado, cada vez que alguien recitaba un verso y no recordaba al autor, bastaba con llamar a Hรฉctor, como lo llamaban todos, para que, con el habitual precisiรณn, resolverรญa el problema. problema. En el servicio pรบblico y en la actividad privada, intentรณ difundir su pasiรณn por la literatura. En 1967, Yรกnover y otros crean el sello discogrรกfico AMB, destinado a la producciรณn de discos en los que los poetas recitan sus propios versos. Grabaron las voces de veinticinco escritores, grabaciones de importantes escritores leyendo sus textos a fines de la dรฉcada del 60 (Jorge Luis Borges, Pablo Neruda, Ernesto Sabato, Manuel Mujica Lainez, Leopoldo Marechal, Gabriel Garcรญa Mรกrquez, Cรฉsar Tiempo entre ellos).En 1999, Yรกnover creรณ una audiciรณn para televisiรณn por cable, “La librerรญa en casa”, en la que asesoraba a los lectores. Su primer libro de poemas fue Hacia el comienzo del hombre (1951), al que siguiรณ Elegรญa y gloria (1958) -que obtuvo la Banda de Honor de la SADE- Por otra boda,Las iniciales del amor, Sigo caminando y Otro poemas. Tambiรฉn publicรณ una novela autobiogrรกfica, Las estaciones de Antonio (que incluye poemas), Raรบl Gonzรกlez Tuรฑรณn y Memorias de un librero , quizรกs la mรกs popular, en la que narrรณ lo que definiรณ como” la picaresca del libro “. Los agradables Los recuerdos tienen una segunda parte, Continuaciรณn de los recuerdos de un librero. En el servicio pรบblico y en la actividad privada, tratรณ de difundir su pasiรณn por la literatura. Muriรณ en 2003.
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Hรฉctor Yรกnover was born in Alta Gracia, Cรณrdoba, Argentina en 1929. He was a poet and bookseller. As such, it became a perhaps unique source of references in Argentina today. Every time someone wanted to obtain a bibliographic data or find an out-of-print book, every time someone recited a verse and did not remember the author, it was enough to call Hector, as everyone called him, so that, with the usual precision, he would solve the problem. trouble. In public service and in private activity, he tried to spread his passion for literature. In 1967, Yรกnover and others created the record label AMB, destined to the production of records in which poets would recite their own verses. They recorded the voices of twenty-five writers (Jorge Luis Borges, Pablo Neruda, Ernesto Sabato, Manuel Mujica Lainez, Leopoldo Marechal, Gabriel Garcรญa Mรกrquez, Cรฉsar Tiempo entre ellos). In 1999, Yรกnover created a cable television audition, “The Bookstore at Home,” in which he counseled readers. His first book of poems was Towards the Beginning of Man (1951), which was followed by Elegy and Glory (1958) -which obtained the SADE Honor Sash- For Another Wedding, The Initials of the Love, I am Still Walking and” Other poems “. He also published an autobiographical novel, The Stations of Antonio (which includes poems), Raรบl Gonzรกlez Tuรฑรณn and Memories of a Bookseller “, perhaps his most popular, in which he narrated what he defined as “the picaresque of the book.” Those pleasant memories have a second part, Continuation of memories of a bookseller. In public service and in private activity, he tried to spread his passion for literature. He died in 2003.
. . .Angustia lejana como un eco que instalada en la carne conmueve las palabras y echa un temblor de hoja azotada al cuerpo. Una cuerda de acero nos recorre los huesos y la agitan con fuerza en la boca del tรบnel el no saber a un costado y el saber al otro. Tendrรฉ que calafatear mis naves nuevamente, tendrรฉ que hacerme a la mar. Esta tierra vacรญa estallarรก en pedazos. Hay que barrer las dudas y llenar las tinajas con las voces del canto. Una guitarra habemos de guardar para aรฑorar el terruรฑo por las noches, una fotografรญa de nuestra alma de niรฑos, y lo demรกs, el sortilegio, el duende, nos encontrarรกn en cualquier parte, al final de la gruta del diablo o en las esquinas de las aguas del cielo. Sรณlo que no hay que temer, repito: no hay que temer, el temblor tiene que irse al fondo de los mares y allรญ pudrirse y desaparecer en el gran viento submarino. Tenemos que aprender la libertad como se aprende un rezo tenemos que creer en ella, hablar a partir de ella y al timonel que agosta los racimos y agua al vino, matarlo, destruirlo, aventarlo en la arena del vรฉrtigo y que arda! ยกAh cuรกnto cuesta aprender a usar el traje de la sinceridad en cada dรญa! ยกCuรกnto cuesta ser fiel a la verdad de nuestra รญntima condiciรณn de hombres! Salid monstruos, fieras cebadas de la mesa tendida y el beso a la hora exacta, bestias que pastan su sapiencia sobre los cadรกveres frustrados de mil generaciones.
ยกTodos los caminos son hermosos! No hay rutas vedadas para el que se asume integralmente y parte en busca del conocimiento. No me toquรฉis manos de cementerio, lenguas untadas en dulce, mentirosas. Odio la experiencia, que no me instruya nadie en los peligros que corro. Odio los recuerdos. El mundo empieza cada maรฑana. El ayer es una ficciรณn. Sรณlo los dรญas por llegar viven en la esperanza y son como una gran bandera que hay que ir desplegando sin reposo hasta mรกs allรก de las estrellas. No soy optimista, la palabra es creo creo en Dios padre todopoderoso que construyo dรญa a dรญa. Creo en la magia y en lo misterioso porque conmigo estรกn desde el primer latido. No temo nada. ยกQuiero no temer nada! Y al dragรณn que se ponga de espaldas a la luz para cerrarme el camino, ยกle abrirรฉ la cabeza! Pero no son ellos quienes me cierran el paso, son manteles limpios, sรกbanas de hilo y la seguridad de mi pan cotidiano. ยกOjalรก fueran monstruos o hidras del acaso! Ojalรก estuviera en los dados ventura y desventura y todo fuera cuestiรณn de arrojarlos. Mundo que te me has metido como una astilla bajo la piel. Palabras que me van rodeando con su sonsonete manoseado. ยฟHay que cerrar los ojos o abrirlos con las uรฑas a dos manos? Hay que embestir o el estallido de la tierra nos seguirรก al infierno, sonando. Sรณlo esta hora de soledad me ha concedido Dios; me han dado visiones y luces para ordenar el rumbo. No hay mรกs bodas con Dios que la primera, si la dejo pasar, al volver el rostro ya habrรฉ encanecido, no sabrรฉ nunca en quรฉ se fue mi vida, entonces tendrรฉ recuerdos: รกgiles palabras de empleado de rutina, corteses respuestas de amanuense y de hortera, seguridad de comerciante, aplomo de millonario. Entonces ya no sabrรฉ. Entonces estas palabras serรกn para mรญ oscuras. Entonces la verdad serรก mi verdad y la sabidurรญa mi conocimiento. Entonces sabrรฉ todas las cosas y ni una sola angustia me sorprenderรก royendo el ruedo de la noche. Y mi sangre serรก un arroyo apacible y mis problemas serรกn terribles pero superables, tendrรฉ una sonrisa renovada cada dรญa y sabrรฉ mรกs que los poetas porque pisarรฉ fuerte sobre la tierra, y en el recodo de los aรฑos pensarรฉ que no he vivido en vano. Escucha Dios, no te vayas. Dame fuerzas para vivir como debo vivir, ahuyenta el miedo de mi pecho como ahuyentaste a los que traicionaban su especie de la puerta del templo. ยกExijo que te quedes porque te necesito! La azada de la muerte no es grande para mis brazos yo tambiรฉn puedo segar a los mรญos y avanzar sobre sus cadรกveres.
Pero no me llamo la guerra ni la peste ni la desorientaciรณn ni el arrepentimiento, me llamo el Poeta. . .
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“Soledad” (fragmento)
. . .Distant anguish like an echo
that installed in the flesh touches the words
and sends a trembling of sharpened blades to the body.
A cord of steel runs through our bones
and and they shake it forcefully in the tunnel’s mouth
on one side the not knowing and knowing on the other.
I will have to caulk my ships once again,
I will have to move to the sea.
This empty land will explode in pieces.
Itโs necessary to sweep away the doubts
and fill the clay vessels with singing voices.
We have to keep a guitar
to yearn for the homeland during the nights,
a photograph of our soul as children,
and the other things, the charm, the spirit,
will find us anywhere,
at the edge of the devilโs cave
or in the corners of the waters of the sky.
Only, that you donโt have to fear.
I repeat, you donโt have to fear,
the tremor must flee to the bottom of the seas
and there, rot and disappear
in the great submarine wind.
We have to learn freedom
as you learn a prayer,
we have to believe in it,
speak from it,
and the helmsman who weakens the roots
and water and wine,
kill him,
destroy him,
throw him in the sand of vertigo and let him burn!
ยกAh how much does it cost to learn to wear
the suit of sincerity every day!
ยกWhat does it cost to be loyal to the truth
of our intimate condition as men!
Get out, monsters,
Wild animals fattened by the bending table
and the kiss at the exact moment,
beasts that graze their knowledge
above the frustrated cadavers
of a thousand generations.
All roads are beautifulยก
There are no forbidden paths
So that the one who comes forward integrally
And leaves in search of knowledge.
Hands from the cemetery, donโt touch me,
hands sweetly oiled,
liars.
I hate the experience,
That doesnโt teach me something of the dangers I face.
I hate the memories.
The world begins every morning.
Yesterday is a fiction,
Only the arriving days live in hope
and are like a large flag
that has to go on flapping without rest
until beyond the stars. I am not an optimist,
the words are I believe
I believe in God, the all powerful
who builds day to day.
I believe in the magic and the mysterious
Because they are with me since the first slap.
I donโt fear anything.
I donโt want to fear anything
And to the dragon that puts his back to the sky
to shut off my way
I will open his skull.
But they arenโt the ones who close off my way,
they are clean tablecloths,
and the security of my daily bread,
I wish they were monsters and hydras of the sunset!
Perhaps they were in those darts; good luck and bad luck
and everything was question of throwing them away.
World that has placed a splinter under my skin.
Words that havenโt surrounded me with their shabby mocking tones.
To you have to close the eyes or open then with the
nails of the two hands?
Do you have to go after them
or will the explosion of the earth follow us to hell,
ringing?
God has conceded me only this hour of contemplation
They have given me visions and lights to order arrange the directions.
There havenโt been any marriages with God since the first,
If I miss it,
when I get back, my hair will be white,
I will never know how what my life went away,
then I will have memories,
agile words of routine use
courteous responses from scribes and of tastelessness,
merchantโs security,
a millionaireโs composure.
Then, I still wonโt know.
Then these words will be obscure for me.
Then the truth will be my truth
and wisdom, my knowledge.
Then I will know everything
and not one anguish
will surprise me, rolling in the wheel of the night.
And my blood will be a peaceful arroyo
and my problems will be terrible but surmountable
I will have a new smile everyday
and I will know more than the poets
because I will step firmly on the earth
and in the turn of the years
I wonโt feel that I lived in vain.
God, listen, donโt go away.
Give me strength to live as I ought to live,
chase away the fears in my chest
as you chased away those who betrayed your species
Diego Paszcowski (Buenos Aires, 1966)Ganador del Premio de Novela del diario La Naciรณn porย โTesis sobre un homicidioโ(Sudamericana, 1999; DeBolsillo 2007; Sudamericana 2013 y 2016), llevada al cine en 2013 por Hernรกn Goldfrid y protagonizada por Ricardo Darรญn; autor deย ย โEl otro Gรณmezโ(Sudamericana, 2001), deย โAlrededor de Lorenaโ(Mondadori, 2006) y deย ย โRosen โ Una historia judรญaโ (Sudamericana, 2013).ย Algunos de sus libros fueron traducidos al portuguรฉs, al italiano y al francรฉs.ย Coordinador del Taller de Escritura para Jรณvenes en elย Centro Cultural Ricardo Rojas (UBA), y director de diversas colecciones deย ยซNuevas Narrativasยปย y de ciclos de lecturas a partir de los trabajos realizados en sus talleres literarios.ย En los รบltimos aรฑos presentรณ su performanceย โNotas de jazzโ junto a destacados mรบsicos, y es autor deย la letra deย ยซEstoy aquรญยป, tema con mรบsica de Alejandro Devries interpretado por Sandra Mihanovich en su discoย โVuelvo a estar con vosโ.ย En 2009, Alfaguara editรณย โEl dรญa en que los animales quisieron comer otra cosaโ, su primer libro de cuentos para niรฑos; en 2013, la misma editorial publicรณ su primera novela para niรฑos,ย โTe espero en Sofรญaโ, en 2016 su segunda novela infantil,ย โLa puerta secreta y otras historias imposiblesโย y en 2019 la tercera, โDonovan, el mejor detective del mundoโ.
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Diego Paszkowski(Buenos Aires, 1966) Ganador del Premio de Novela del diario La Naciรณn por โTesis sobre un homicidioโ(Sudamericana, 1999; DeBolsillo 2007; Sudamericana 2013 y 2016), llevada al cine en 2013 por Hernรกn Goldfrid y protagonizada por Ricardo Darรญn; autor de โEl otro Gรณmezโ(Sudamericana, 2001), de โAlrededor de Lorenaโ(Mondadori, 2006) y de โRosen โ Una historia judรญaโ (Sudamericana, 2013). Algunos de sus libros fueron traducidos al portuguรฉs, al italiano y al francรฉs. Coordinador del Taller de Escritura para Jรณvenes en el Centro Cultural Ricardo Rojas (UBA), y director de diversas colecciones de ยซNuevas Narrativasยป y de ciclos de lecturas a partir de los trabajos realizados en sus talleres literarios. En los รบltimos aรฑos presentรณ su performance โNotas de jazzโjunto a destacados mรบsicos, y es autor de la letra de ยซEstoy aquรญยป, tema con mรบsica de Alejandro Devries interpretado por Sandra Mihanovich en su disco โVuelvo a estar con vosโ. En 2009, Alfaguara editรณ โEl dรญa en que los animales quisieron comer otra cosaโ, su primer libro de cuentos para niรฑos; en 2013, la misma editorial publicรณ su primera novela para niรฑos, โTe espero en Sofรญaโ, en 2016 su segunda novela infantil, โLa puerta secreta y otras historias imposiblesโ y en 2019 la tercera, โDonovan, el mejor detective del mundoโ.
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Rosen-Una historia judรญa
No quiero a Max Rosen. Sรฉ lo bastante de su vida, de sus correrรญas, de sus travesรญas y hasta sus delitos como para estar por completo de no deberรญa quererlo. Y, sin embargo, De sus correrรญas, de sus travesรญas y hasta sus delitos, reales o inventados, mรกs los reales que los inventados, no han dejado de atraerme, aun cuando se oponen a todos los principios que he defendido en la vida, aun cuando la vida me ha traรญdo ya a los ochenta aรฑos, cuando el alma cuenta, segรบn se sabe, con un vigor especial. En cualquier caso, y aunque hace tiempo escribo, fascinado, sobre รฉl. Deseo dejar en claro en estas lรญneas que no quiero a Max Rosen.
ย Max se iniciรณ en el comercio a los cinco aรฑos de edad: ya entonces compraba y vendรญa joyas, no verdaderas, desde luego, sino sencillas piedras de la calle convertidas en joyas por la inagotable imaginaciรณn infantil. Su hermano Aarรณn, con nueve aรฑos cumplidos, lo iniciaba en los secretos del comercio, tal vez por haber notado que por las amigos de sus padresโShรญe y Ruju, por caso. Tenรญan una tienda de ropa en el pujante barrio de Caballito, y pensaban abrir pronto un sucursalโeran mรกs prรณsperos de su propia familia, mantenida a duras penas por un simple obrero textil. Y tambiรฉn sabรญa Aarรณn, que los parientes que habรญan quedado en Montevideo, y se dedicaban a la curtiembre, eran mรกs importantes y ricos que los Rosen, quienes habรญan hecho la mala elecciรณn de desembarcar en Buenos Aires.
ย Porque lamentaba el oficio de su padre, la comunidad de aquel viaje hasta Buenos Aires y el destino de pobreza que les esperaba, Aarรณn habรญa decidido encargarse de la instrucciรณn de su hermano Max. โยฟCuรกnto vale este zafiro?โ, preguntaba, y le mostraba a su hermano una piedra pequeรฑa y gris. โDos pesosโ, decรญa Max, que no tenรญa una verdadera idea del valor de las cosas y ni siquiera sabรญa quรฉ era un zafiro o un diamante. โNo, vale veinte milโ, decรญa el hermano mayor, el menor aceptaba: โBien, veinte milโ, decรญa. โPues te darรฉ ocho milโ, decรญa Aarรณn, y si el joven Max y el menor aceptaba yย por esa suma se la entrega era reprehendido, como tambiรฉn era reprehendido si insistรญa mรกs de la cuenta en reclamar los veinte mil. Hasta que, muy pronto, el niรฑo reclama mรกs de la cuenta en reclamar los veinte mil. Hasta que muy pronto el niรฑo inteligente aprendiรณ lo que tenรญa que aprender: โCreo que quince mil es un precio justo por esta piedraโ, decรญaโ, y su hermano lo felicitaba, aunque luego decรญa: โesta no es una piedra, es un zafiro. . .y esta es un rubรญ, si no lo crees nunca podrรกs hacer que los demรกs lleguen a creerloโ.
* * *
ย ย ย ย Y asรญ fue como Max, ya sin compaรฑero, ya sin compaรฑero de aventuras, se dedicรณ a visitar, en una soledad tranquilizadora, los luminosos sitios en que los dueรฑos de aquellas mรกquinas se quedaban con el sueldo de los pobres trabajadores perdidos por la pasiรณn del juego, por la ilusiรณn por una fortuna siempre esquiva, y por sus propias miserias. Cada tanto echaban a Max, era cierto, pero tambiรฉn cada tanto รฉl encontraba la mรกquina precisa, el golpe exacto en la parte exterior de la mรกquina que harรญa que expulsase una cantidad de fichas suficientes para vivir, incluso con algunas comodidades, todo un mes. Max cambiaba de ropa y de peinado, llevaba anteojos o no los llevaba, elegรญa los horarios de mayor concurrencia o de menorโy en ese caso ya habรญa entablado amistosa relaciรณn con algunos de los encargados de impedirle la entradaโy de algรบn modo descubrirรญa la de la mรกquina mรกs dรฉbil, el golpe seco en la parte posterior, el tintineante sonido de monedas que caen, de luces que se encienden, de duraznos o cerezas o limones que de pronto deciden alinearse, . .
ย Pero la verdadera habilidad de Max no residรญa en saber jugar al pรณkerโalgo que desde luego hacรญa, tras una vida de haber visto a su padre, de haber encontrado el mรฉtodo para saber quรฉ cartas quedarรญan en el mazo y deducir en consecuencia con cuรกles podrรญan contar sus adversariosโsino en poder determinar, con sรณlo ver unas pocas manos del juego, quรฉ hombres serรญan capaces de jugar para รฉl, es decir para la casa. La exigencia era notable, ya que no sรณlo se buscaba a alguien que tuviese habilidad o suerte sino tambiรฉn resistencia; aquellas partidas se prolongaban desde las seis de la tarde de un dรญa hasta de las ocho de la noche, y era muy mal visto abandonar la mesa antes del tiempo establecido, a menos que se hubiese perdido todo. Max no jugaba, pero organizar aquello era para รฉl un verdadero juego de niรฑos: apostadores compulsivosโno lo pobres diablos en las mรกquinas la mitad o todos el sueldo, y que ambicionaban sin suerte acceder a aquella sala donde, se suponรญaโdebรญan llamar por telรฉfono para reservar un lugar exclusivo en que el dos, o en algunos casos tres jugadores profesionales contratados por Max, desde luego en combinaciรณn procederรญan a desplumarlos. . . .
* * *
Cada vez que las ganancias de sus actividades sobrepasaron lo esperado, elegรญa a una asociaciรณn de la comunidad para hacer beneficia; podรญa ser tanto el asilo de ancianos judรญos ubicado en la lejana localidad de Burzaco, como el centro Simรณn Wiesenthal, recientemente creado en los Estados Unidos para para la persecuciรณn y castigo de los inmundos criminales nazis, como a familia de un pobre rabino ciego y olvidado por Dios. Las donaciones destinadas a hacer el bien, hacen el bien en sรญ mismas, mรกs allรก del origen o de lo procedencia del dinero, y era por eso que todos aceptan encantados lo que Max ofrecรญa; quiรฉn si no un verdadero รกngel podrรญa ser aquel que se presentaba en alguna asociaciรณn necesitada de ayuda sรณlo para darlo todo, sin pedir, como se dice, algo en cambio. Lo รบnico que preocupaba a Max era que se recordara su nombre. Si hubiese sido un verdadero รกngel, o sus acciones guiadas o simple bondad, tal vez hubiera deseado permanecer anรณnimo, como anรณnimos son las regalos de Purim para que ningรบn pobre se sienta avergonzado, pero no era รฉste el caso de Max: que se recordara su nombre era una forma de ganar amigos.
ESPAรA
Los dรญas se convirtieron en semanas, y las semanas en todo un mes, pero al cabo de aquel primer mes en Espaรฑa, Max tuvo una revelaciรณn que podrรญa en resumirse en la frase โuno debe ser quien debe serโ. Era asรญ simple, y eso cambiaba todas las cosas. Antes habรญa pensado que, para ganarse la vida, debรญa emplearse como vendedor, o bien intentar dar clases en ajedrez, o de fรบtbol, o instalarse en Madrid varias mรกquinas โtragaperrasโ, o dedicarse a jugar al pรณker en forma profesional, pero ahora veรญa que todo mรกs claro: uno debe ser quien debe ser, y no un fantasma de lo que pudo haber sido. Eran las diez de la maรฑana y aรบn no habรญa desayunado. Se hallaba, como de costumbre, en el banco de su plaza favorita, pensando en las escasas posibilidades que le ofrecรญa el destino, y se levantรณ de pronto, caminรณ hasta la calle de Santa Engracia y mirรณ en el reloj de vidriera de un negocio de ropa: nadie confiarรญa su dinero ni su trabajo que le darรญa trabajo a un hombre asรญ, tan delgado que ni podรญa reconocerse con la barba crecida, el cabello largo y prolijo, la ropa sucia, alguien que le parecรญa un mendigo que a un hombre de bien. Aรบn quedaba dinero suficiente para vivir siete meses de la forma en que vivรญr, pero la forma en que vivรญa, no podรญa llamarse vivir. Debiรณ hacer un cambio radical, y a partir de lo que habรญa pensado en las cuentas resultaban sencillas podrรญa conseguir un albergue siete veces mejor, tomar desayunos siete veces mรกs sabroso, vestir como vestรญa de antes, es decir: cambiar siete meses de aquella vulgar de sobrevivida por un mes, tan sรณlo un mes, de su vida pasada.
De regreso a Madrid, y ahora con dinero suficiente, Max abandonรณ sus labores en la peluquerรญa para multiplicar, en el comercio, su radio de acciรณn. Era sencillo, y no tan distinto a lo que su hermano en la infancia, le habรญa enseรฑado: comprar por menos, vender por mรกs, y quedarse con la diferencia sin sentir ningรบn remordimiento alguno. Las comisiones existen desde que el mundo, pensaba Max, desde el primer mono consiguiรณ dos bananas gracias a las indicaciones que el otro mono amigo se quedรณ con una.
ย En tanto el embarazo de su mujer progresaba de acuerdo con lo esperado y ella, que en su nuevo estado habรญa cambiado de humor y ahora parecรญa enojada todo el tiempo, le exigรญa que cumpliese con una promesa que รฉl le habรญa hecho antes de viajar: a Guadalupe no le bastaba haberse casado con Max por las leyes civiles sino que esperaba que ambos, en la iglesia, formalizasen su matrimonio. Esto a Max le parecรญa ridรญculo, ya que ella ni siquiera planteaba una ceremonia mixta, que en aquel tiempo era novedad. Debรญa ser en la iglesia, y no en cualquiera sino en una que Lupe. Y si a Max se le ocurrรญa ponerse alguna objeciรณn o, de regreso en casa tras una semana entera de arduo trabajo, tenรญa el impulso de reรญrse de las locas pretensiones de Lupe, Lupe acudรญa a su mรกs melodramรกtico tono para decirle: โquรฉ te importa, si segรบn dices tรบ ni crees en Diosโ, y tambiรฉn โhazlo aunque mรกs no sea por la memoria de mi madre, que en paz descanse, no sabes lo mucho que a ella le hubiese gustadoโ.
Y despuรฉs de todo ella tenรญa razรณn: quรฉ importaba dejarse rociar con agua bendita, que importaba jurar por un dios, o por otros, o por ambos, o por tres, o por ninguno, si las cosas de cualquier modo jamรกs cambiaban. Si casarรญa, si eso era lo que la hacรญa. Se casarรญa bajo las condiciones que ella impusiese: si al cura no le importaba que รฉl tuviese la circuncisiรณn, a รฉl tampoco le importarรญa. De modo que juntos concurrieron a la Parroquia de San Antonio, en el nรบmero ciento cincuenta de la calle Bravo Murillo, en el mismo barrio en el que vivรญan y donde tambiรฉn la madre de Lupe se habรญa casado, e iniciaron allรญ los trรกmites que hicieron meses despuรฉs Max Rosen, con veintiocho aรฑos cumplidos, en el caluroso agosto de mil novecientos sesenta y uno, tomara la Sagrada Comuniรณn y obtuviera del obispo local. Mintiรณ en cada pregunta que le hicieran, y dijo todo lo que todo sacerdote querรญa escuchar de su boca, mientras pensaba: por mรกs se sumerja en una fuente repleta de agua bendita, un judรญo sigue siendo un judรญo por toda la eternidad.
ISRAEL
ย ย ย De los kibutzim que en la Oficina del Ministerio de Absorciรณn e inmigraciรณn le propusieron para que se instalase, Max eligiรณ precisamente el mรกs alejado de las grandes ciudades, el mรกs cercano a los peligrosos Altos de Golรกn, y al mismoโy por los mismos motivos–, el mรกs confortable.
* * *
ย ย ย Entre las numerosas mujeres que conociรณ en Israel, solo una le interesaba. No era la mรกs bonita de todas, ni la mรกs dispuesta; tenรญa ya dos hijos y un marido muerto en la Guerra de los Seis Dรญas, contra cuyo heroica memoria ni Max ni nadie hubiera podido competir. Jana Katz no querรญa saber nada con Max Rosen, y era casi la รบnica de todas las solteras o viudas en el kibutz que no habรญa caรญdas bajo sus encantos. โLa gracia de la vidaโ, pensaba Max entonces, โradica en buscar lo imposibleโ.
* * *
ย ย ย ย Asรญ como todos en el kibutz habรญan lamentado su partida hacia el ejรฉrcito, todo el kibutz, ahora festejaba su regreso, incluida aquella mujer, quien de pronto se mostraba mรกs receptiva a sus galanteos, mรกs interesados en sus historias, mรกs atenta a lo que รฉl pudiera proponerle. . .
ย ย ย Dios cierra las puertas, pero siempre deja abierta una ventana. Y allรญ estaba Max, de regreso a los brazos de Jana y a un amor que, desde que viera a la mujer, no habรญa dejado sentir que le pertenecรญa. Ahora ellos compartรญan una misma habitaciรณn, y en el kibutz se debatรญa sobre la conveniencia o no de los niรฑos de todos de todas las familias aunque durmieron juntos.
ย ย ย Sin embargo, no le resultรณ tan sencillo convencerla: primero debiรณ volver pruebas de sinceridad y rectitud, y lo que hizo para ganar al fin la confianza de Jana fue contarle todo lo que habรญa hecho en su vida, desde los diecisรฉis aรฑos hasta aquellas รบltimas vacaciones en Tel Aviv, sin omitir detalle. Y aunque la tradiciรณn recomienda ser breve en el diรกlogo con las mujeres, todas las noches, despuรฉs de la cena, Jana escuchaba fascinada el relato de la vida de Max, como si de novela se tratase, si bien aรบn lamentaba la pรฉrdida del ser heroico amante vencido, podรญa ver en aquel hombre que le cortejaba desde hacรญa aรฑos a un verdadero sobreviviente. Asรญ somos los judรญos, sobrevivientes: a mรกs que mil aรฑos de persecuciones, a la Shoรก, a las mil penurias que Dios, en Su infinita sabidurรญa para algunos, en un mortal indiferencia para otros, ha sabido entregarnos para poner a prueba la sinceridad de nuestra fe.
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Rosen-A Jewish Story
I donโt like Max Rosen. I know enough about his life, his escapades, his journeys and even his sins in order to be totally convinced that I shouldnโt like him. And, nevertheless, of his escapades, his journeys and even his sins, real or invented, more the real ones than the invented, havenโt ceased to attract me, even when they go against the principles that I have defended in my life, even the live that has brought me to eighty years old, when the soul does count, as we know, with a special vigor. In whatever case, and even though it was some time ago, I write, fascinated about him. I want to make it clear, in these lines, that I donโt like Max. Rosen.
Max was initiated into commerce at the age of five; even then he bought and sold jewels, not real ones of course, but simple stones converted in jewels by his unlimited childhood imagination. His brother Aaron, at nine years old, initiated him in the secrets of business, perhaps having learned from the friends of his parents–Shie and Rulu, for example. They had a clothing store in the thriving neighborhoodย of Caballito, and they thought about opening another branchโthey were the most prosperous of his own family, which was barely sustained, by enormous effort by a simple textile worker. And Aaron also knew about that the relatives that had remained in Montevideo, dedicated themselves to the tannery, were the most important and rich of the Rosen, who had made the bad choice of disembarking in Buenos Aires.
ย Because he lamented his fatherโs trade, the community that made that trip to Buenos Aires and the fate of poverty that awaited them, Aaron had decided to take on the instruction of his brother Max, โHow much is this sapphire worth?โ he asked and showed his brother a small, gray stone. โTwo pesosโ, said Max, who didn’t have a true idea of the value of things, and he didnโt even what was a sapphire or diamond was. โNo, itโs worth twenty thousand, the older brother said. They younger brother accepted. โOkay, Iโll give you twenty thousand, he said. Then, then Iโll give you eight thousand,โ Aaron said, and if Max, the younger, accepted that amount,ย and delivered the stone, he was reprehended. As he was also reprehended, if he insisted on more than the sum in demanding the twenty thousand. Until he quickly the intelligent boy learned what he had to learn: โI think fifteen thousand is a fair price for this stone,โ he said, and his brother congratulated him, though he said: โThis is not a stone, it is a sapphireโฆand this is a ruby, if you donโt believe it, you will never get the others to believe it.โ
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ย And so it was that Max, now without a companion, now without a companion for adventure, dedicated himself to visit, in a tranquilizing solitude, the illuminated places in with the owners of those slot machines gathered up the salaries of the poor workers lost by a passion for gaming, by the illusion of an always elusive fortune, and by their own misfortunes. Every once in a while, they threw Max out, but also once in a while he found the exact machine, the exact blow in the back of the machine that would make it eject a sufficient quantity of tokens to allow him to live, even with a few luxuries, for an entire month. Max changed clothes and haircut, he wore eyeglasses, or he didnโt wear them, he chose the times of greatest traffic or of leastโand in that case he had already a friendly relationship with some of those who were supposed to keep his outโand in one way or another, he would discover the spot on the weakest machine, the dry blow on the rear part, the quiet jingling of the falling coins, the lights that brighten, with peaches or cherries or lemons that quickly decide to line up. . .
* * *
ย However, Maxโs true ability wasnโt in knowing how to play pokerโsomething that of course he did, after a lifetime of having seen his father, of having found the method for knowing which cards remained in the deck and to deduce accurately what his adversaries could count onโbut rather in being able to determine, after seeing only a few hands, which men would be capable of playing him, thatโs to say for the house. The exigency was notable, since he not only looked for someone who had skill or luck, but also stamina; those games went on from six in the afternoon on one day until eight oโclock in the evening, and it was strongly looked down upon to abandon the table before the established time, unless you had lost everything. Max didnโt play, but he organized what was for him true childโs play, compulsive bettersโnot the poor devils of the machine with half or all of their pay, and who, wanted badly, but unsuccessfully to accede to that room where, it was thoughtโthey ought to make a telephone call to reserve an exclusive place in which two or in some cases three professional card players, contracted by Max, who, of course in combination, proceeded fleece them. . .
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ย ย ย ย Every time that the winnings from his activities went beyond what was hoped for, he chose a community association to give a charitable gift; it could be the home for aged Jews, located in the far away town of Burzaco, of The Simon Wiesenthal Center, recently created in the United Sates for the persecution and punishment of the filthy Nazi criminals, or the family of a poor rabbi, blind and forgotten by God. The donations, sent to do good, did good in themselves, beyond the origin and source of the money, and for that reason, everyone accepted with delight what Max offered; who if not a true angel could be the one who came to a needy organization only to give it all, without asking for, how do you say, anything in return. The only thing that worried Max was that his name be remembered. If he had been a true angel, or his actions guided by simple goodness, perhaps he would have desired to remain anonymous, as Purim gifts are anonymous so that no poor person is embarrassed, but that wasnโt Maxโs case; his name being remembered was a way of gaining friends.
The days became weeks, and the weeks in a complete month, but at the end of that first month in Spain, Max had a revelation that could be summarized the phrase: โone should be what one should be.โ It was that simple, and that changed everything. Before, he had thought that to earn a living, he ought to be employed as a salesman, or set out to give classes in chess, or football, or to install in Madrid several slot machines or to dedicate himself to playing poker as a profession, but now he saw everything more clearly, and not as a ghost of what he could have been. It was ten oโclock in the morning, and he hadnโt had breakfast yet. He found himself, customarily, on a bench in his favorite plaza, thinking about the scarce possibilities that his fate offered him, and he quickly stood up, walked toward Santa Engracia Street and looked at glass clock of clothing store: nobody would trust his money nor hisXXX to a person like that, so thin that he couldnโt even recognize himself with his beard grown out, and his hair long and thick, the dirty clothes. Someone who appeared to be a beggar rather than a man of means. He still had enough money to live for seven months in the way he had been living, but the way he was living couldnโt be called living. He had to make a radical change, and from what he thought, with what he had, he simply could find a place to live that was seven times better, have breakfasts seven times tastier, dress as he had dressed before, that is to say: exchange seven months of that vulgar life for a month, only a month of his past life.
* * *
ISRAEL
ย ย Of the kibbutzim the Office of the Ministry of Absorption and Immigration offered him to settle in, Max chose precisely the furthest from the big cities, the closest to the dangerous Golan Heights, and at the same timeโfor the same motives, the most comfortable.
ย ย ย ย Of the numerous women that Max met in Israel, only one interested him. She wasnโt the prettiest or the most available: she already had two children and a husband who died in the Six Day War, against whose heroic memory, neither Max nor anyone could compete. Jana Katz didnโt want to know anything of Max Rosen: and she was almost the only one of the unmarried women or widows on the kibbitz who hadnโt fallen under his charm.
โThe ย ย fun of life,โ thought Max then, โlies in seeking the impossible.โย
* * *
Just as everyone in the kibbutz had regretted his leaving for the army, now they all celebrated his return, including that woman, who quickly showed herself to be more responsive to his courtship, more interested in his stories, more attentive to what he could suggest to her.. .
* * *
ย ย God shuts the doors, but always leaves a window open. And there was Max, on returning, in the arms of Jana and a love that, since he saw the woman, he had not ceased feeling that she belonged to him. they shared the same room, and in the kibbutz, they debated the advantage or not of having all the children from all the families even if they slept together.
ย ย Nevertheless, it wasnโt so easy to convince her; first he had to return proofs of sincerity and rectitude, and what he did to finally gain Janaโs confidence, was to tell her all that he had done in his life, from sixteen years old to those recent vacations in Tel Aviv, without omitting a detail. And even if the tradition recommends being brief in dialogues with women, every night, after supper, fascinated, Jana listened to the tale of Maxโs life, as it were a novel, even if she still mourned the loss of her defeated heroic lover, she could see in that man who courted her for years a true survivor. We Jews are survivors: after more than a thousand years of persecutions, of thousand travails that God, in His infinite wisdom for some, in a mortal indifference for others, has known how to give us the chance to test the sincerity of our faith.
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Libros de Diego Paszkowski/Books by Diego Paszkowski
Pedro Orgambide naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1929. Orgambide publicรณ libros y ensayos en Argentina, asรญ como mantuvo un compromiso con la cultura. Debiรณ exiliarse en 1974 a Mรฉxico hasta 1983, cuando pudo regresar a la Argentina, durante el gobierno democrรกtico de Raรบl Alfonsรญn. De dilatada trayectoria creativa y compromiso social, Pedro Orgambide escribiรณ mรกs de 40 obras, entre novelas, teatro, cuentos, ensayos y libretos para la televisiรณn. Por su pasiรณn por la mรบsica. Orgambide escribiรณ los textos y las letras de Eva, el gran musical argentino, Continuando su labor polรญtica iniciada en Argentina, Orgambide trabajรณ con la organizaciรณn guerrillera de izquierda Montoneros. A causa de sus relaciones polรญticas, la Junta Militar argentina prohibiรณ su difusiรณn cultural durante la dictadura en una lista donde se encuentran Julio Cortรกzar, Marรญa Elena Walsh, David Viรฑas, Tomรกs Eloy Martรญnez, Mercedes Sosa, Atahualpa Yupanqui y Hรฉctor Alterio, por sus “antecedentes ideolรณgicos marxistas”. Durante su exilio mexicano (1974-1983), no cesรณ su actividad literaria, cultural y polรญtica. En 1975 fundรณ la revista Cambio, junto con Juan Rulfo, Julio Cortรกzar y Josรฉ Revueltas, publicada por la Editorial Extemporรกneos entre los aรฑos 1974 y 1976. En 1981, fundรณ la editorial Tierra del Fuego junto con otros escritores argentinos, David Viรฑas, Jorge Boccanera y Humberto Costantini. En 1976 obtuvo en La Habana el Premio Casa de las Amรฉricas por el libro de relatos y mini-ficciones Historias con tangos y corridos Al aรฑo siguiente (1977), recibe el Premio Nacional de Novela de Mรฉxico. Tambiรฉn obtuvo el Premio Konex – Diploma al Mรฉrito en 1994. En 2002 fue nombrado Ciudadano Ilustre de la Ciudad Autรณnoma de Buenos Aires.
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Pedro Orgambide
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Pedro Orgambide was born in Buenos Aires in 1929. Orgambide published books and essays in Argentina, as well as maintained a commitment to culture. He had to go into exile in Mexico in 1974 until 1983, when he was able to return to Argentina, during the democratic government of Raรบl Alfonsรญn. With a long creative career and social commitment, Pedro Orgambide wrote more than 40 works, including novels, theater, short stories, essays and scripts for television. For his passion for music. Orgambide wrote the texts and lyrics for Eva, the great Argentine musical. Continuing his political work begun in Argentina, Orgambide worked with the left-wing guerrilla organization Montoneros. Because of its political relations, the Argentine Military Junta prohibited its cultural diffusion during the dictatorship in a list where Julio Cortรกzar, Marรญa Elena Walsh, David Viรฑas, Tomรกs Eloy Martรญnez, Mercedes Sosa, Atahualpa Yupanqui and Hรฉctor Alterio are found, for their ” Marxist ideological antecedents “. During his Mexican exile (1974-1983), his literary, cultural and political activity did not cease. In 1975 he founded the magazine Cambio, together with Juan Rulfo, Julio Cortรกzar and Josรฉ Revueltas, published by Editorial Extemporรกneos between 1974 and 1976. In 1981, he founded the Tierra del Fuego publishing house together with other Argentine writers, David Viรฑas, Jorge Boccanera and Humberto Costantini. In 1976 he won the Casa de las Amรฉricas Prize in Havana for the book of short stories and mini-fictions Historias con tangos y corridos. The following year (1977), he received the National Novel Prize of Mexico. He also obtained the Konex Award – Diploma of Merit in 1994. In 2002 he was named Illustrious Citizen of the Autonomous City of Buenos Aires.
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Tรญo Ezra y sus sobrina Orquรญdea
El tรญo Ezra no estaba en el mundo cuando la Inquisiciรณn se dio a la tarea, fanรกtica e inรบtil, por seguir a los libreros. Pero el Tรญo Ezra habรญa leรญdo tanto sobre aquellos tiempos, que al fin, creรญa que haberlos vivido. Varios siglos despuรฉs, en una vieja librerรญa en el Barrio de Once, en Buenos Aires, el Tรญo Ezra puso en su catรกlogo un libro de Claude Fell titulado Mecรกnisme et activitรฉ de la censure inquisitorial de 1600 a 1640, publicado en Parรญs en 1960. Su sobrina Orquรญdea hizo la ficha. Despuรฉs le sirviรณ tรฉ a su Tรญo Ezra, librero y especialista en temas de la Inquisiciรณn. El tiempo (una de las obsesiones de Ezra Midlin) anulaba esas ilusorias distancias a travรฉs de la literatura y el Tรญo Ezra creรญa ser (era por un instante) el librero Ignacio Laert, perseguido por los inquisidores. โEs el librero con quien conviene estar con mucho cuidado, pues a libros polรญticos y vedados les ha sentido mucha inclinaciรณn. . .โ El Tรญo Ezra podrรญa pensar que hablaban de รฉl. Su aficiรณn a libros polรญticos, censurados, vedados, escarnecido por el poder de los hombres venรญa de muy lejos, de una adolescencia peregrina por Rusia y Polonia y Alemania y Europa Central, de infatigables y persistentes lecturas en trenes de carga, calabozos y tabernas de conspiradores. Es cierto que todo esto habรญa quedado atrรกs, en el engaรฑoso โantesโ de Tรญo Ezra, un tiempo de zares, zarinas, archduques, valses vieneses, cartas de Rosa Luxemburg, viejas actas de la Inquisiciรณn, periรณdicos anarquistas, documentos y refutaciones teolรณgicas de Savonarola, escritos humanistas de Miguel Servet, textos de enciclopedias, panfletos jacobinos, cartas de Robespierre y de Murat, manuscritos del joven Marx, en fin, todo este papeleo de la Historia, ese nudo del mundo que el Tรญo Ezra habรญa transformado en pacรญfica y melancรณlica contemplaciรณn. Mientras tomaba el tรฉ que le servรญa su sobrina Orchid, el Tรญo Ezra contabilizaba el tiempo, lo apresaba en sus anaqueles, con esa ingenua avaricia de los eruditos y los filatelistas, conocedores de un error, una cita incorrecta, de las debilidades y desmesuras de la gente de acciรณn. Algunos traductores de El Capital lo hacรญan reรญr, los omisiones por pereza o ignorancia de los editores lo indignaban. Salvo esas inocentes distracciones, el Tรญo Ezra no se permitรญa otro placer, salvo cuidar de su sobrina Orquidea. Como su querido Heine, รฉl podรญa decir que llevaba el contrabando en la cabeza. Varias veces, en su dilatada vida de librero, habรญa recibido la visita de la policรญa, pero a decir verdad, nunca lo habรญan molestado con prisiones. Sus clientes eran gente inofensiva, como รฉl profesor de historia, simpatizantes del viejo Partido Socialista, decorosos ancianos profesores de historia que buscaban alguna fecha, algรบn dato de la historia olvidada. En la trastienda, junto al samovar humeante, ciertas noches de invierno, se reunรญan algunos de los periodistas israelitas, viejos amigos del Tรฎo Ezra. Solรญan citar a Scholem Asch, a Leo Peretz, a los escritores de la diรกspora, que ya nadie leรญa, sobre todo los jรณvenes, como decรญa el doctor Brustein. Hablaban en idish, el menospreciado idioma que Tรญo Ezra valoraba como el buen tรฉ, el pan negro , el pepino, el arenque ahumado, la amistad. Tambiรฉn hablaba en idish con su sobrina Orquรญdea, la hija de Sara y Saรบl, el viejo actor que habรญa muerto en el asilo de Burzaco recordando la efรญmera gloria de llevar el gran arte a los colonos de Moisรฉs Villa y de Rivera. En fin: ella es mi flor, mi vida, pensaba el Tรญo Ezra mientras veรญa crecer el fruto de ese apasionado amor senil de su hermano, el actor, y de la pobre Sara.
–Si viviera tu mamรกโdecรญa en idish el Tรญo Ezraโse morirรญa al verte tan delgadita. ยฟQuรฉ ganas de no comer?
–Estoy comiendo, tรญo.
–Como un pajarito. En mis tiempos las muchachas comรญan como leรฑadores.
–No quiero ser leรฑador, tรญo.
–ยฟQuรฉ quieres ser, a ver? ยฟCantante de televisiรณn? ยฟActriz como tu madre?
–Soy taquidactilรณgrafaโse reรญa Orquidea.
–Yo no me rรญo. Yo no me rรญo. No se puede trabajar, estudiar, salir a bailar, si no estรก bien comido. . .ยกClaro! . . .a ella no le importan esas cosas! . . . ยกElla tiene que conservar su silueta para la televisiรณn!
–Pero tรญo . . .
–No me interrumpas, Orquรญdea, no me interrumpas. . . Le prometรญ al orgulloso de tu padre (que no quiso venir conmigo despuรฉs de lo de Sara) que te iba a cuidar como a una hija. Y voy a cumplir.
–Mario no fue a trabajar. Lo llevaron preso.
–ยฟMario? ยฟQuรฉ Mario?
–El chico con quien fui a bailar la semana pasada. El patrรณn dice que es terrorista.
–Beis, bies. . .
–Me gusta Mario, tรญo. Tengo miedo que le pase algo malo.
“Come, come. . . ยฟO quieres matar al Tรญo Ezra de un disgusto?
–Tรญo, no tengo hambre.
–Come lo mismo. Uno nunca sabe cuando llegarรก otro tiempo de hambre para nosotros.
–Nunca mรกs volveremos a pasar hambre.
–ยฟQuiรฉn te lo dijo, Orquรญdea? Oh, Dios ยฟquiรฉn te lo dijo que el mundo era bueno?
–Me engordas como una vaca. Yo no soy una vaca, Tรญo Ezra.
–Tรกgule, paloma. ยฟquรฉ modales son esos? ยฟQuรฉ dirรญa tu madre si volviera?
–Que soy una vaca.
–Tuve un amigo en Rusia, un pintor. Pintaba vacas que volaban, corderitos que volaban, muchachas vestidas de novia que volaban a la Luna.
–Yo no soy un vaca, Tรญo Ezra.
–No, no. Claro que no. Eres la mรกs hermosa, la mรกs dulce de las sobrinas.
–Porque no tienes otras.
–Te tengo a ti y me basta. Hazme un favor, Orquรญdea, come un poquito mรกs, ยฟsรญ?
–Pusieron una bomba en la sinagoga, ยฟcrees que nos perseguirรกn? ยฟQuรฉ le pasarรก a Mario?
–No lo sรฉ. Orquidea, no lo sรฉ. El mundo no es bueno para nosotros. En Rusia yo tenรญa un amigo que pintaba violinistas que volaban, novias y corderitos que volaban a la Luna.
–ยฟDรณnde estรก tu amigo, tรญo Ezra?
–ยฟQuiรฉn puede saberlo?
–ยฟSabes? Me gustarรญa volar hasta la Luna.
–Sigue comiendo, Orquidea.
Esta misma tarde de 1976, una vez que Orquรญdea termina de tomar el tรฉ y parte hacia la oficina, Ezra Midlin vuelve a leer el รญndice inquisitorial de 1613. โSon tantos los libros que con los herejes enemigos de nuestra Santa Fe procurado, procuran ofender la pureza de su doctrina, con el zelo que nos toca de conservarla obliga a tratar de con nuevo cuidado el remedioโ . . . –ยฟQuรฉ otro remedio inventarรกn, Dios Mรญo?โse pregunta Tรญo Ezra que vio quemar los libros en las calles de Berlรญn, cuarenta aรฑos atrรกs . . . ยฟQuรฉ otro remedio?, se dice y le parece ver a su amigo Itza, arrojรกndose a la ventana con un libro prohibido. Pobre Itza, era amigo de Thomas Mann, de Jacob Wassermann . . . hasta Stefan Zweig (recuerda Ezra) . . . y de los nuevos , los jรณvenes, porque . . . โvan saliendo cada dรญa nuevos autores, que casi con mejor insolencia y furor que los pasados escriben, divulgando sus errores. . .โ Fue un error. Mario, seguramente fue un error y esta noche estarรกs de regreso con papรก y mamรก, sheine ingul . . un error . . . Todo es un gran error –piensa Tรญo Ezra mientras camina entre los anaqueles repletos de libros. Un error, muchacho.
En la visiรณn de Tรญo Ezra, la Humanidad es un sucesiรณn de libros prohibidos que en su continua producciรณn y destrucciรณn crea un inmenso Libro de omisiones, donde los mรกs arriesgados se atreven a leer, donde nuevos copistas reparan los pรกrrafos quemados en un sรณtano de Salamanca (1622) o las calles de Berlรญn (1934) o en un cuartel de la ciudad de Cรณrdoba (1976), un mismo libro condenado, inabarcable, invicto a las hogueras, que Ignacio Laert y Ezra Midlin y todos los libreros de la Tierra deben conservar. Es su รบnico deber, al fin de cuentas, la condiciรณn misma de ese oficio que se ha transformado en su arte, su manรญa, su vicio; no espera ninguna recompensa por su adicciรณn; por el contrario, sabe que, de algรบn modo, ella lo acerca a la triste suerte de los condenados. Por prudencia. por temor, intenta disimular los libros mรกs peligrosos entre viejos mapas del Nuevo Mundo y algunos pรกjaros embalsamados. No obstante, la tarea de juzgar por sรญ mismo sobre la peligrosidad de los textos, le parece una tarea tediosa e inรบtil. Un librero le informa que han prohibido un libro de Josรฉ Martรญ; otro, que han requisado el libro del general Bartolomรฉ Mitre acerca de los guerrillas en tiempos de la Independencia. โTonterรญas, tonterรญasโ dice el Tรญo Ezra mientras acaricia un librito vedado del Siglo XVII que habla de la igualdad de todos los hombres ante Dios. Sin embargo, es difรญcil tranquilizarse. Esa tarde, Orquรญdea regresa llorando.
–Mataron a Mario. Dijeron que intentรณ fugarse. ยกLo mataron, tรญo Ezra!. . .
–Beis, beis . . . ยฟquรฉ mundo es รฉste se preguntรณ el librero.Esa noche el Tรญo Ezra suena el mundo: es una vasta biblioteca de libros vedados, en la que extravรญan algunos jรณvenes bellos e inmortales, que leen, sin prisa, la historia de los hombres. Un joven moreno, cubierto con una tรบnica, antiguo sacerdote de la India, recuerda que el primer hombre (la persona primordial, dice) fue el purusa desprendido del pensamiento (el aliento) de los dioses y cita el canto IV del ring Veda. Un joven chino, dirigente de la Revoluciรณn Cultural, comienza a pintar en grandes caracteres, un poema de Mao, refuta la tesis del sacerdote, abomina de Confucio, recuerda a los viejos prรญncipes (centros del mundo) a los mandarines que inmovilizaban la vieja poesรญa en los rituales, las ceremonias de la escritura. Otro, de modales ambiguas, recita en griego una canciรณn de Safo, defiende la tesis de una erรณtica de la persona humana, menos ruidoso que la revoluciรณn chino, que el verso yรกmbico y el realismo de Homero. รrabes y persas aplauden al joven, pero el escriba egipcio, con modestia, recuerda las relaciones entre la producciรณn agrรญcola y el poema, evoca las mรกrgenes del Nilo y una frase de Marx. En tablillas de arcilla, en pergaminos, los copistas y escribas intentan fijar las palabras, otros mueven cilindros de oraciones; algunos esculpan piedra, otros escriben con navajas en hojas de bambรบ. Un joven pragmรกtico de los Estados Unidos propone la utilizaciรณn de microfilm y de las computadoras que pueden procesar la informaciรณn que puedenโdiceโordenarlas con una memoria menos falible que la de los hombres, con lรณgica electrรณnica. El soviรฉtico se opone, aduce una maniobra del imperialismo cultural. Y los jรณvenes del Tercer Mundo optan por la alfabetizaciรณn masiva y la ediciรณn de libros populares. Un argentino que habla de la generaciรณn del โ40, prefiere la ediciรณn reducida, numerada y con firma del autor. Se ve el Tรญo Ezra, complaciendo a todos, ecuรกnime entre los รฉpicas que registran batallas y las poetisas del Siglo XIX, entre los altivos renacentistas y los jรณvenes aztecas de la Casa del Canto, entre los bulliciosos surrealistas que proponen transformar la biblioteca en un cabaret literario y los pรกlidos heresiarcas que no quieren hablar. Pregunta a los cabalistas pero ellos le responden, en hebreo, con palabras enigmรกticas, con nombres (menos el Nombre) y una serie de nรบmeros. Su sobrina Orquรญdea sirve el tรฉ y vuela, vestida de novia, entre los anaqueles, junto al samovar, un corderito, un violinista y una vaca de Rusia y el retrato de Mario. Es entonces cuando el joven rubio de camisa parda, el SS, confiesa a los demรกs que tienen los dรญas, los siglos contados, que el incendio de la biblioteca de Alejandrรญa fue sรณlo un seรฑal, que ahora sรญ, la cosa va en serio, porque no queremos extranjeros que ensucien el ser nacional, abran la puerta, carajo.
El Tรญo Ezra abre la puerta y entran los hombres y preguntan por Orquรญdea y dicen que vieron su direcciรณn en la libreta de Mario y el Tรญo Ezra quiere explicarles que ella es una muchacha que no se mete en lรญos, pero los hombres de anteojos oscuros y los otros uniformados apuntan al Tรญo Ezra y comienzan a requisar los libros, libros vedados y prohibidos a los que ha sentido mucha inclinaciรณn, no toquen a Orquidea, no la toquen, pero alguien lo golpea en la cabeza y el Tรญo Ezra despierta en una librerรญa de Amsterdam de 1616 y sabe que la pesadilla continรบa.
Uncle Ezra was not on this world when the Inquisition gave itself over the the task, fanatical and useless, of going after booksellers. But Uncle Ezra had read so much about those times, that, finally, he believed that he had lived them. Several centuries later, in an old bookstore en Barrio Once in Buenos Aires, Uncle Ezra put into his catalogue a book by Claude Fell, entitled Mecรกnisme et activite decensure inquisitorial de 1600 a 1640, published in Paris in 1960. His niece Orquรญdea made up the file card. Then she served tea to her Uncle Ezra, bookseller and specialist in topics dealing with the Inquisition. Time (one of Ezra Midlin’s obsessions) anuleed those illusory distance through literature and Uncle Ezra believed himself to be (for an instant) the bookseller Ignacio Laert, persecuted by the inquisitors. “It is the bookseller who must act with great care, political and banned books have been felt has made them feel a great deal of interest. . .” Uncle Ezra felt that they were speaking about him. His affection for political, censured, prohibited, scarred by men’s power came tor very far, from a peregrine adolescencia through Russia and Poland and Germany and Central Europe, from tireless and persistent reading in freight trains, jails and conspirator’s taverns. It is true that all of this had remained behind, in the tricky “before” of Uncle Ezra, a time of tzars, tzarinas, archdukes, Viennese Waltzes, letters from Rosa Luxemburg, old acts of the Inquisition, anarchist periodicals, documents and theological refutations of Savonarola, Humanist writings by Miguel Servet, texts of encyclopedias, Jacobin pamphlets, letters by Robespierre and Murat, manuscripts by the young Marx, in sum, all of this papaleo of History, that knit of the world that Uncle Ezra had transformed into pacific and melancholy contemplation. While he was drinking the tea that his niece Orquid served him, Uncle Ezra paid attention to the time, captured it in his shelves, with that ingenious avarice of the erudite and the stamp collectors, connoisseurs or an error, and incorrect citation, of the weaknesses and the excesses of men of action. Some of the translations of Das Kapital made him laugh, the omissions by laziness or ignorance of the editors made him indignant. Beyond those innocents distractions, Uncle Ezra did not permit himself any other pleasure, except taking care of his niece Orchid. Like his beloved Heine, he could say that he carried the contraband in his head. Several times, during his long life as a bookseller, he had received a visit by the police, but to tell the truth, they had never bothered him with imprisonment. His clients were inoffensive people, like him: history professors, sympathizers of the old Socialist Party, decorous old people who were looking for a certain date, a bit of information that the memory forgot. In the backroom, together with the smoky samovar, some Saturday nights, some of the Jewish journalists would meet, old friends of Ezra. They usually cited Sholem Asch, Leo Peretz, the writers of the Diaspora, who nobody read anymore, especially the young people, as Dr. Brustein said. They spoke in Yiddish, that disparaged language that Uncle Ezra valued as much as good tea, black bread, cucumbers, smoked herring, friendship. He also spoke Yiddish to his niece Orchid, the daughter of Sara and Saul, the former actor who had died in the Burzaco asylum, remembering the ephemeral glory of bringing great art to the colonists of Moisรฉs Villa and Rivera. So, she is my flower, my life, Uncle Ezra thought, while he saw this fruit of that passionate senile love of his brother, the actor and the poor Sara.
“Mario didn’t go to work. They arrested him.”
“Mario? What Mario?”
The boy with whom I went dancing last week. The boss says he is a terrorist.”
“Beis.. .beis. . .
“I like Mario, uncle. I’m afraid that something bad is going to happen to him.”
“Eat, eat. . . or do you want to kill your Uncle Ezra with annoyance?””
“Uncle. . .I’m not hungry”.
“Just the same, eat. You never know when we’ll have another time of hunger.”
“We’ll never be hungry again.”
“Who told you, Orchid? Oh, God, who told you that the world was good?”
You are fattening me like a cow. I am not a cow, Uncle Ezra.”
“Taiguele, dove, watch your manners? What would your mother say if she were alive?”
“That I am a cow.”
“I had a friend in Russia, a painter. He painted cows that flew, little lambs that flew, girls dressed as brides that flew to the Moon.”
“I’m not a cow, Uncle Ezra.
“No, no, of course not. You are the most beautiful, the sweetest of the nieces.”
“Because you don’t have any others.”
“I have you, and that’s enough for me. Do me a favor, Orchid, eat a little bit more, yes?
“What were your friends talking about yesterday, Uncle Ezra?
“Beis. . beis. . .nothing important.”
” I am not a little girl, Uncle Ezra.”
“Troubles. . .what do you want to know? Strikes and things like that. . .”
“The placed a bomb in the synagogue. Do you think they are persecuting us? What will happen to Mario?”
“I don’t know, Orchid, I don’t know. The world is not good for us. In Russia I had a friend who painted violin players who flew, brides and little lambs that flew to the Moon.
“Where is your friend, Uncle Ezra?”
“Who could know?”
“You know? I want to fly to the Moon.
“Keep eating, Orchid.”
“I’m not a cow, Uncle Ezra.”
That same afternoon in 1976, once that Orchid finished her tea and left for the office, Ezra Midlin read the Inquisitorial Index of 1613. “There are so many books that the heretics, enemies or our faith are procuring, they succeed in offending the purity of our doctrine, that the zeal that makes us conserve it obliges us to insure the remedy with new caution.” “What other remedy will they invent, My God,” Uncle Ezra asked himself, he had seen the burning of books in the streets of Berlin, forty years ago. . .What other remedy,” he said to himself, and he seemed to see his friend Itza, throwing himself out a window with a prohibited book. Poor Itza, he was a friend of Thomas Mann, of Jacob Wasserman. . .even Stefan Zweig (Ezra remembers). . .and of the new ones, the your, because. . .”everyday are coming out new authors, who write with almost more insolence and furor than the past ones, divulging their errors. . .” It was a mistake. Mario, certainly was a mistake and tonight, you will be on the way home with papa and mama, sheine ingul . . .a mistake. . .Everything is a great mistake”, Uncle Ezra thinks while he walks among the shelves full of books. A mistake, my boy.
In Uncle Ezra’s view, Humanity is a succession of prohibited books that in their continuous production and destruction creates an immense Book of omissions , where the bravest dared to read, where new copyists repair the burnt paragraphs in a basement in Salamanca (1622) or the streets of Berlin (1934) or in a barracks in the city of Cรณrdoba (1976), a same book, condemned, immeasurable, undefeated by the bonfires, that Ignacio Laert and Ezra Midlin and all the booksellers of the World should save. It is their only responsibility, at the end of the day, the same condition of this trade that has been transformed in its art, its mania, its vice; it doesn’t expect and recompense for its addiction; on the contrary, it knows, it brings closer the sad luck of the condemned. By prudence, by fear, it intents to hide the most dangerous books between old maps of the New World and some embalmed birds. However, the task of judging by itself the danger of the texts, seemed to him a tedious and useless task. A bookseller informed him that they have prohibited a book by Josรฉ Martรญ: another, that the have requisitioned the General Bartolomรฉ Mitre’s book about the guerillas in the times of the Independence. “Nonsense, nonsense,” Uncle Ezra says while he caresses a small prohibited book from the XIXth century that speaks about the equality of all men before God. Nevertheless, it is difficult for him to keep calm. That afternoon, Orchid returned crying.
“They killed Mario. They said he was trying to escape. They killed him, Uncle Ezra!”
“Beis, beis . . . what kind of world is this?, the bookseller asked himself.
That night, Uncle Ezra dreamed the world: it is a vast library of forbidden books in which some beautiful and immortal young people wandered, who read without hurrying, the history of men. A dark-skinned young man, covered with a tunic, ancient priest of India, remembers that the first man (the primodial person, he says) was the disinterested purusa of thought (the breath) of the gods, and he cites the Canto IV of the Ring Veda. A Chinese young man, director of the Cultural Revolution, begins to paint in large characters, a poem by Mao, refutes the thesis of the priest, abhors Confucius, remembers that the ancient princes (centers of the world) the Mandarins who immobilized the old poetry in the rituales, the ceremonies of writing. Another, of ambiguous manners, recites in Greek a song by Sappho, defends the thesis of an erotica of the human person, less noisy than the Chinese Revolution, the the iambic verse and the realism of Homer. Arabs and Persians applaud the young men, but the Egyptian scribe, with modesty, remembers the relationship between agricultural production and the poem, evokes the banks of the Nile and a phrase by Marx. On tablets or clay, on parchments, the coyists and scribes try to set the words others move cylinders of prayers, others sculpt stone, others write with razors on bamboo leaves. A pragmatic young man from the United State proposes the utilization of microfilm and the computers that can process information that can–he says–order it with a memory that is less failable that that of men, with electronic logic. The Soviet opposes, adduces a maneuver of cultural imperialism. And the young people of the Third World opt for massive alphabetization and the edition of popular books. An Argentine who speaks of the Generation of ’40, prefers the limited edition, numbered and with the author’s signature. Uncle Ezra is seen, pleasing all, unruffled by the epics that record battles and the female poets of the XIXth Century, between the haughty of the Renaissance and the young Aztecs from the House of Song, among the boisterous surrealists who propose transforming the library in a literary cabaret and the pallid heresiarchs who don’t want to speak. He asks the Kabbalists but they respond to him in Hebrew, with enigmatic words, with names (except the Name) and a series of numbers. His niece Orchid serves the tea and flies, dressed as a bride, among the shelves, near the samovar, a little lamb, a violin player and a cow from Russia and the portrait of Mario. It is then when the blond young man in a brown shirt, confesses to the others that they have their days, they centuries counted, that the burning of the Library of Alexandria was only a signal, that now, yes, things are serious, because we don’t want strangers who dirty the national being, open the door, shit.
Uncle Ezra opens the door, and the men enter and ask for Orchid and as they saw her address in Mario’s address book, and Uncle Ezra wants to explain to them that he is a girl that doesn’t get into trouble, but the men with the dark glasses and the others in uniform point at Uncle Ezra and begin to register the books, forbidden and prohibited books to those who have felt a great deal of inclination, don’t touch Orchid, don’t touch her, but someone hits him in the face, and Uncle Ezra awakens in a bookstore in Amsterdam in 1616, and he knows that the nightmare continues.
Paula Varsavsky es una escritora de ficciรณn y periodista argentina. Vive en Buenos Aires. Sus publicaciones incluyen la novela Nadie alzaba la voz (Emecรฉ, 1994), tambiรฉn publicada en los Estados Unidos en traducciรณn al inglรฉs por Anne McLean como No One Said a Word (Ontario Review Press, 2000, Wings Press, 2013), una segunda novela El resto de su vida (Mondadori, 2007), una colecciรณn de cuentos; La libertad de los huรฉrfanos y otros cuentos y una colecciรณn de conversaciones con escritores britรกnicos y estadounidenses que incluye a Joyce Carol Oates, Richard Ford, David Lodge, Hanif Kureishi, Edmund White, David Leavitt, Siri Hustvedt, Ali Smith, Esther Freud y William Boyd titulado Las mil caras del autor (EDUVIM, 2015; RIL Editores, Chile 2016 RIL Editores Espaรฑa 2018).
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Paula Varsavsky is an Argentine fiction writer and journalist. She lives in Buenos Aires. Her publications include the novel Nadie alzaba la voz (Emecรฉ, 1994), also published in the U.S. in English translation by Anne McLean as No One Said a Word (Ontario Review Press, 2000, Wings Press, 2013), a second novel El resto de su vida (Mondadori, 2007), a collection of short stories La libertad de los huรฉrfanos y otros cuentos and a collection of conversations with British and American Writers that includes Joyce Carol Oates, Richard Ford, David Lodge, Hanif Kureishi, Edmund White, David Leavitt, Siri Hustvedt, Ali Smith, Esther Freud and William Boyd entitled Las mil caras del autor (EDUVIM, 2015; RIL Editores Chile 2016; RIL Editores Spain 2018).
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Annette Prekker Levine es profesora asociada de literatura espaรฑola y latinoamericana en Ithaca College. Ha escrito extensamente sobre literatura del perรญodo de la dictadura argentina, ha traducido para el archivo argentino de derechos humanos, Memoria Abierta, y tambiรฉn traduce ficciรณn y poesรญa. Sus traducciones de cuentos de Paula Varsavsky y Aรญda Bortnik han aparecido en World Literature TodayLatin American Literature Today.
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Annette Prekker Levine is associate professor of Spanish and Latin American literature at Ithaca College. She has written extensively on literature of the Argentine dictatorship period, has translated for the Argentine human rights archive, Memoria Abierta, and also translates fiction and poetry. Her translations of short stories by Paula Varsavsky and Aรญda Bortnik have been featured in World Literature Today and Latin American Literature Today.
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El bautismo de los radiotelescopios
Por Paula Varsavsky
El 9 de agosto de 2019 recibรญ un email de un remitente desconocido, me llamaron la atenciรณn las palabras โinvitaciรณnโ y โbautismoโ en el asunto. Volvรญ a leer: Invitaciรณn a la ceremonia de bautismo de los radiotelescopios del IAR. Abrรญ el archivo adjunto: โEl director del Instituto Argentino de Radioastronomรญa Prof. Dr. Gustavo E. Romero, tiene el honor de invitar a la Srta. Paula Varsavsky al acto de puesta en funcionamiento y bautismo de los radiotelescopios de la Instituciรณn. Se llevarรก a cabo el dรญa 30 de septiembre de 2019 a las 11hs en el Instituto Argentino de Radioastronomรญaโ. Tuve la imagen de un cura en este evento cientรญfico en una instituciรณn estatal, la desechรฉ, no podรญa ser. ยฟEntonces, de quรฉ se trataba?, me preguntรฉ.
Me invitaban por ser la hija del astrofรญsico Carlos M. Varsavsky, judรญo y argentino. รl muriรณ en 1983, yo tenรญa diecinueve aรฑos. Treinta y seis aรฑos mรกs tarde tenรญa la oportunidad de ejercer de hija por unas horas.
Una semana despuรฉs de que me llegara esa invitaciรณn, cuando ya habรญa contestado que asistirรญa recibรญ un email de mi hermano que vive en Madrid, donde me reenviaba su invitaciรณn. Decรญa que รฉl no podรญa ir y me preguntaba si yo podrรญa hacerlo. Pensรฉ que quizรก no imaginaba que, siendo hijos los dos, nos debรญan haber invitado a ambos. Respondรญ que ya habรญa confirmado mi asistencia.
En 1962 por iniciativa del Dr. Bernardo Houssay, entonces Presidente del CONICET, junto con la UBA y la UNLP se creรณ el Instituto Argentino de Radioastronomรญa, al cual se le asignรณ un predio descampado dentro del Parque Pereyra Iraola y un director, el Dr. Carlos M. Varsavsky. Entiendo que se tratรณ de un desafรญo ideal para mi padre: estaba todo por construir. Pronto armรณ un equipo de cientรญficos, tรฉcnicos y cuidadores del instituto. Para mรญ, eran una gran familia y Clotilde, la cocinera, la madre de todos. Algunos de los recuerdos mรกs felices de mi infancia sucedieron allรญ.
En aquella รฉpoca, fines de la dรฉcada del sesenta y principios de los setenta no existรญa la autopista, ir y volver desde la Capital todos los dรญas se asemejaba a una aventura a la pampa hรบmeda donde parte del camino era de tierra.
Durante las vacaciones de verano, papรก solรญa llevarnos a mi hermano y a mรญ a pasar el dรญa allรญ, a veces invitaba a nuestro primo David. Habรญa una pileta de lona, bicicletas y ese inmenso parque donde jugar. Guardo una hermosa foto en blanco y negro de mi primo, mi hermano y yo en la pileta de lona del IAR. Tenรญamos once, nueve y cinco aรฑos respectivamente. Todavรญa puedo oรญr la voz de papรก que les decรญa: โCuiden a Paulitaโ.
Nuestro primo desapareciรณ en febrero de 1977, asรญ estรก descripto por Josรฉ Luis DยดAndrea Mohr en un artรญculo publicado en el diario Pรกgina 12 el 26/06/2000: โDavid Horacio Varsavsky, tรฉcnico electrรณnico, tenรญa 19 aรฑos y preparaba el ingreso a la Facultad de Ingenierรญa. El 17 de febrero de 1977 debรญa presentarse en el Distrito Militar Buenos Aires para comenzar con el servicio militar. Vivรญa en la Capital Federal, dentro de la Zona 1, bajo la autoridad del general Carlos G. Suรกrez Mason y del general Josรฉ Montes como comandante de Subzona. La noche anterior cuatro civiles armados y un uniformado como Policรญa Federal allanaron la casa familiar y se llevaron a David en presencia de su madre. Dijeron a la seรฑora que era un procedimiento rutinario, que se quedara tranquila. Tras un calvario de siete aรฑos, el 8 de mayo de 1984, el Estado Mayor del Ejรฉrcito respondiรณ al Ministerio de Defensa que ยดDavid Horacio Varsavsky, al no presentarse para su incorporaciรณn, fue acusado como infractor a la Ley de Servicio militar obligatorio el 18 de febrero de 1977. David continรบa desaparecido junto a 128 soldados conscriptos de la รฉpoca procesistaโ. Supe que, por ser judรญo, habrรญa recibido torturas mรกs intensas.
El radiotelescopio, una estructura de metal con forma de paraguas puesto hacia arriba que ocupaba alrededor de media manzana estaba situado cerca del edificio principal. En esa construcciรณn de dos platas de ladrillo a la vista estaban las oficinas, el รกrea de fotografรญa, las computadoras y unos muebles de madera con estantes de donde saquรฉ sin permiso un cuaderno de tapas duras color gris para dibujar. Sin embargo, mientras iba a preescolar, lo que mรกs deseaba era aprender a escribir.
El del 30 de septiembre, a las diez de la maรฑana me pasa a buscar un remis (incluido en la invitaciรณn). Mientras bajo lamento no haberle dicho a mi hijo que viniera y advierto que no hubiera sabido explicarle de quรฉ se trataba, aรบn no tengo claro quรฉ es eso del bautismo.
Ya en el auto veo que pasamos Plaza San Martรญn, giramos hacia la izquierda y tomamos la avenida Eduardo Madero. Recuerdo que el 29 de julio pasado, en el aniversario de la Noche de los bastones largos, alguien me enviรณ un mensaje por facebook pidiรฉndome que escribiera algo al respecto. โTu padre se lo mereceโ. Hija obediente, googleรฉ aquel nefasto evento. Encontrรฉ, entre tantos otros, un artรญculo titulado Aquรญ termina una etapa del Dr. Rodolfo H. Busch publicado en la Biblioteca Virtual de la Facultad de Ciencias Exactas de la UBA en 2016, del cual cito un pรกrrafo: โCarlos Varsavsky estรก delante de mรญo. La sangre le gotea por las orejas, forma un mapa sobre su espalda. Tiene el impermeable empapado en sangre y un paraguas en la mano. Parece que estรก mareado. Un estudiante se acerca al cordรณn de la vereda y vomitaโ. A raรญz de la publicaciรณn que hice donde incluรญa esta informaciรณn, mamรก me contรณ, por primera vez, que ella tambiรฉn habรญa estado en Exactas la noche del 29 de julio de 1966. Mis padres habรญan quedado en ir a cenar afuera despuรฉs de que รฉl terminara de dar clase. Por ese motivo ella estaba en la Facultad de Ciencias Exactas y Naturales de la Universidad de Buenos Aires cuando llegรณ la policรญa para intervenir, bajo รณrdenes del General Onganรญa. En cierto momento, papรก le dijo que se fuera, que volviera a casa. โCuando salรญ, la calle Perรบ estaba desierta. Un policรญa, rodeado de tantos otros, con un altoparlante en la mano, les decรญa a las autoridades, profesores y estudiantes de la facultad que era el รบltimo aviso, si no salรญan, ellos entrabanโ. A eso de las tres de la maรฑana, alguien la llamรณ para avisarle que papรก estaba en el Hospital Militar, la policรญa lo habรญa llevado, luego de golpearle fuertemente la cabeza y dejarlo horas sangrando. Mamรก me contรณ que รฉl volviรณ a casa a la madrugada con la cabeza completamente vendada.
Escucho que el Waze indica que debemos salir de la utopista, damos una vuelta y pasamos debajo del arco de entrada al Parque Pereyra Iraola, una construcciรณn que se asemeja a la de un castillo de hadas con toques medievales. Ingresamos a la zona de mayor biodiversidad de la Provincia de Buenos Aires. Metros antes de un camino estrecho veo el primer cartel que indica la existencia del IAR, una seรฑal modesta, quizรก solo para entendidos. El paisaje luce igual al que recuerdo de mi infancia y de las pocas veces que fui desde entonces en las que me invitaron a otros homenajes.
Entramos a ese lugar bucรณlico en una maรฑana hรบmeda del inicio de la primavera con un cielo gris tormentoso. Estacionamos bajo unos รกrboles altos y aรฑosos que deben haber pertenecido a aquella estancia de diez mil hectรกreas convertida en el Parque Pereyra Iraola en el aรฑo 1948. En cuanto bajo del auto quedo envuelta en una brisa y en el sonido de los pรกjaros que parecen trinar mรกs fuerte que de costumbre, como si anunciaran lluvias intensas.
Camino con rapidez, apenas miro de reojo el edificio principal donde estaba la oficina de papรก. Llego a la zona donde se encuentran los dos imponentes radiotelescopios de unos treinta metros de altura cada uno. Voy ubicando algunas caras conocidas de cientรญficos que conocรญ en otras oportunidades en que fui al IAR o entreguรฉ el Premio Carlos Varsavsky a la mejor tesis doctoral en Astronomรญa que se da cada dos aรฑos durante la reuniรณn de la Asociaciรณn Argentina de Astronomรญa en distintos lugares del paรญs. Estuve por ese motivo en Salta, Mar del Plata, Cรณrdoba y San Juan.
Saludo al Dr. Gustavo Romero, actual director del Instituto Argentino de Radioastronomรญa. Me comenta que la ceremonia estรก por empezar, mientras seรฑala unas sillas blancas acomodadas en filas. Como al pasar, agrega que los nombres de los radiotelescopios serรกn Carlos M. Varsavsky y Esteban Bajaja. Reciรฉn entonces me entero de cuรกles serรกn los nombres de los radiotelescopios que serรกn bautizados. Me da pena que mi hermano se pierda este homenaje.
Encuentro una silla con un cartelito que dice mi nombre y, al lado, una con el nombre Amalia Bajaja, hija de Esteban Bajaja, el astrofรญsico que habรญa sido alumno de papรก, cuyo apellido oรญ de chica. Otras sillas tienen los nombres de Fernando Tauber (Presidente de la Universidad Nacional de La Plata), Raรบl Kulichevsky (Director ejecutivo de la Comisiรณn Nacional de actividades espaciales), Raรบl Pardomo (Decano de la Facultad de Astronomรญa y Geofรญsica de la UNLP). Ademรกs, veo tres sillas destinadas a autoridades de la Comisiรณn de Medioambiente, Ciencia y Tecnologรญa de la Embajada de Estados Unidos en Argentina. Dรฉcadas atrรกs la Carnegie Institution dio una generosa ayuda econรณmica para la construcciรณn de la Antena Uno. En otras sillas estรกn sentados astrรณnomos jรณvenes: chicos y chicas reciรฉn recibidos. Le pido a una de ellas (que siguen siendo minorรญa respecto de los varones en este รกrea) que me saque unas fotos con la gran antena.
La Antena Uno se inaugurรณ en marzo de 1966. Yo tenรญa dos aรฑos y papรก, entonces director del instituto, profesor titular de fรญsica en la Facultad de Ciencias Exactas y Naturales de la UBA y uno de los creadores de la licenciatura en Astronomรญa de la Universidad Nacional de La Plata, tenรญa treinta y dos. Me contaron que estuve en la inauguraciรณn y que, mientras daba el discurso de apertura del acto, en brazos de mi mamรก yo gritaba โยกEse es papรก, ese es papรก!โ.
Recorro mentalmente proyectos que รฉl realizรณ: IAR, Fate electrรณnica, la construcciรณn y puesta en marcha de la fรกbrica de aluminio ALUAR. Voy hacia atrรกs en su vida, su secundario en el Nacional Buenos Aires, la beca que obtuvo para estudiar ingenierรญa fรญsica en University of Colorado, el doctorado en Astrofรญsica en la Universidad de Harvard, el post doctorado en California, el regreso a la Argentina despuรฉs de residir nueve aรฑos en Estados Unidos. La estadรญa en Londres como investigador y docente en University of London, a donde fue con mamรก y mi hermano. En Inglaterra mamรก quedรณ embarazada de mรญ.
Sentada frente al radiotelescopio que desde hace cincuenta y tres aรฑos se llama Antena Uno y que en pocos minutos pasarรก a llamarse Carlos M. Varsavsky, escucho las palabras del Dr. Gustavo Romero que, en tono coloquial, narra brevemente la historia del instituto y llega al evento que nos convoca: โLuego de muchos aรฑos en los que nuestras antenas no han tenido nombre, hemos decidido bautizar a los primeros radiotelescopios latinoamericanos. Se trata de un gesto de reconocimiento a los hombres que con enorme perseverancia y realizando una tarea titรกnica lograron sacar adelante estos proyectos. Es por eso que hemos decidido bautizar al radiotelescopio uno con el nombre de Carlos Varsavsky, en honor al primer director del Instituto Argentino de Radioastronomรญa y al radiotelescopio dos con el nombre de Esteban Bajaja en honor al cientรญfico bajo cuya direcciรณn se logrรณ poner en funcionamiento el segundo radiotelescopioโ
Luego de que terminan las palabras de las autoridades, nos llaman a Amalia Bajaja y a mรญ al escenario. Descubren las placas con los respectivos nombres de nuestros padres y nos dan, a cada una, un diploma y una rรฉplica en 3D de los radiotelescopios elaborada por el personal tรฉcnico del instituto.
Me acerco al micrรณfono, contengo las lรกgrimas y agradezco, agradezco por papรก, sรฉ cuรกnto amรณ al IAR, a su gente, al universo que se dejรณ ver y estudiar desde el hemisferio sur. Las investigaciones que lograron realizar le dieron la posibilidad de escribir los libros Astronomรญa elemental y Vida en el universo que, ademรกs de sus especulaciones sobre la posibilidad de vida en otros planetas y galaxias, contiene una dedicatoria inolvidable: โA Martรญn y Paula, dos seres de otro mundoโ.
La tormenta supo esperar a que terminara el acto, mientras caen gotas inmensas sobre nosotros, nos acercamos a una de las construcciones de una planta, ahora nos toca comer, brindar, conversar y distendernos.
Cuando deja de llover, camino hacia el auto que me estรก esperando para llevarme de vuelta a casa. Paso por el edificio principal, entro, ya no me parece gigantesco como cuando era chica. Recuerdo las palabras que papรก me anotaba en el cuaderno gris de tapas duras para que copiara: TIERRA, LUNA, SOL, SATURNO, MARTE, JรPITER, MERCURIO, PLUTรN, NEPTUNO, URANO, VENUS, MAMร, PAPร, MARTรN, PAULA. Sรฉ que le debo al IAR el hecho de haber aprendido a escribir allรญ, siendo escritora y periodista, quedo eternamente agradecida.
On August 9th, 2019, I received an email from a name I didnโt recognize. The words โinvitationโ and โbaptismโ in the subject line caught my attention. I reread it: Invitation to the baptism of the IAR radio telescopes. I opened the attachment: โThe director of The Argentine Radio Astronomy Institute, Professor Dr. Gustavo E. Romero, is honored to invite Ms. Paula Varsavsky to the inauguration and baptism of the institutionโs radio telescopes. The event will take place on September 30th, 2019 at 11am at the Argentine Radio Astronomy Institute.โ I imagined a priest participating in this scientific event being held at a government run institution. Rejecting the notion, I wondered what the baptism could mean.
They invited me for being the daughter of Astrophysicist Carlos M. Varsavsky who was Argentine and Jewish. He died in 1983, when I was nineteen years old. Some thirty-six years later, I was being given the opportunity to fulfill the role of daughter once again for a few hours.
About a week after having already replied that I would attend, my brother Martin emailed me from Madrid, forwarding me his invitation. He told me he couldnโt make it and asked if I could go in his stead. I guess he didnโt realize that theyโd invite the two of us seeing as how we are both Carlos Varsavskyโs children. I wrote back letting him know that I had already confirmed my attendance.
In 1962, Dr. Bernardo Houssay, then president of the National Scientific and Technical Research Council, joined forces with the University of Buenos Aires and the National University of La Plata to create the Argentine Radio Astronomy Institute (IAR). A vacant parcel of land in Pereyra Iraola Park was allotted and Dr. Carlos M. Varsavsky was named director. I know it was the perfect challenge for my father โ everything was yet to be built. He quickly gathered a team of scientists, engineers, and caretakers for the institute. To me, they seemed like one big family. And the cook, Clotilde, was like a mother to everyone. Some of my happiest childhood memories took place there.
At that time, the late sixties and early seventies, there wasnโt yet a highway, so going to and from Buenos Aires every day was like an adventure to the humid Pampas, complete with dirt roads.
In the summers, Dad would sometimes bring my brother and I along for the day, occasionally taking our cousin David too. Weโd swim in the above ground pool, ride bicycles, and play in that enormous park. I have a precious black and white photo of David, Martin, and I at that pool. We were 11, 9, and 5 years old respectively. I can still hear my father calling out: โTake care of Paulita.โ
Our cousin David disappeared in February, 1977. In an article published in the Argentine daily, Pรกgina 12,on June 26, 2000, Josรฉ Luis DโAndrea Mohr writes: โDavid Horacio Varsavsky, aspiring electronics engineer, was 19 years old and preparing to study in the School of Engineering. On February 17, 1977, he was due at the Military District of Buenos Aires to begin his military service. He lived in the capital, in Zone 1, under the authority of General Carlos G. Suรกrez Mason and General Josรฉ Montes, Sector Commander. On the eve of his scheduled enlistment, armed men in civilian clothes and one dressed in Federal Police uniform broke into the familyโs home and abducted David in his motherโs presence. They told her it was a routine procedure, that she should remain calm and not worry. After a seven-year ordeal, on May 8, 1984, the Army Chief of Staff responded to the Ministry of Defense stating: โDavid Horacio Varsavsky, upon not arriving for his enlistment date, was accused of violating the Mandatory Military Service Law on February 18, 1977.โ David continues disappeared along with 128 conscripted soldiers from the years of the Argentine dictatorship.โ I learned that he probably endured more intense torture for being Jewish.
The radio telescope, a metal structure shaped like an inverted umbrella occupying half a city block, was located near the main building. That two-story brick building housed the offices,the photography center, the computers, and some wooden furniture and shelves where I once found a hardcover grey sketchbook that I kept for myself without asking permission. Though I was only a preschooler, what I most desired was to learn to write.
As stated in the invitation, a driver picks me up at my home at 10 am on September 30th. I make my way to the car regretting not having invited my son, and then I realize that I wouldnโt even have known how to explain the purpose of the invitation to him. I still donโt know what this baptism is all about.
I study the route as we drive past Plaza San Martin and turn left onto Eduardo Madero Ave. I recall a Facebook message I received last July 29th, on the anniversary of The Night of the Billy Clubs, from someone urging me to write about the topic. Their words lingered: โYour father deserves it.โ Being the obedient daughter I am, I googled the nefariousevent. Among the many articles, there was one entitled โThe End of an Eraโ by Dr. Rodolfo H. Busch published in the virtual library of the School of Exact Sciences of the University of Buenos Aires in 2016. I posted the following excerpt from the article on Facebook: โCarlos Varsavsky is right in front of me. Blood is dripping from his ears, forming a map on his back. His coat is blood-soaked and heโs holding an umbrella. He seems faint. A student comes out to the curb and vomits.โ Mom saw the post and, for the first time ever, she told me she had also been there the night of July 29th, 1966. My parents were planning to go out for dinner after my father was done teaching, which is why my mother was at the School of Exact and Natural Sciences when General Onganรญa ordered the police to intervene. At a certain point, Dad urged her to leave, that she should return home. Mom recounted โPeru Street was completely deserted when I left. An officer, among a sea of other policemen, spoke into a bullhorn and gave the university administrators, faculty, and students their final warning. They had to leave or the police would storm the building.โ Around three in the morning, someone called to let her know Dad was at the Hospital Militar. The police had taken him there after beating him and leaving him to bleed for hours. Mom told me his head was completely wrapped in bandages when he came home just before daybreak.
I hear Waze instructing us to exit the highway. We turn and pass under the Pereyra Iraola Park arch, an entryway resembling a fairytale castle with a touch of the medieval. We enter the most biodiverse area in the Province of Buenos Aires. Several feet ahead of a narrow road, I see the first marker, a modest sign thatโs easy to miss, announcing our arrival at the IAR. The landscape is just as I remember it from my childhood and the few times I have been invited to attend other commemorative events.
We arrive at that bucolic setting on a muggy morning at the beginning of spring under an ominous grey sky. We park beneath some large, age-old trees that were surely part of the original 25,000-acre ranch that became Pereyra Iraola Park in 1948. I step out of the car and find myself enveloped by a breeze and the sound of birds calling louder than usual, as if warning of heavy rain.
Walking briskly, I glance only briefly at the main building where my fatherโs office had been. I reach the area of the two towering radio telescopes, each standing about 100 feet tall. I recognize some scientists Iโve met on other occasions at the IAR or when presenting the biannual Carlos Varsavsky Prize for the best doctoral thesis in Astronomy, an award given at the Argentine Astronomy Association Meeting held around the country, bringing me to Salta, Mar del Plata, Cรณrdoba, and San Juan.
I greet Dr. Gustavo Romero and he tells me the ceremony is about to start as he gestures to a few rows of white chairs. In passing, he mentions that the two radio telescopes will be named Carlos M. Varsavsky and Esteban Bajaja. The true significance of the baptism of the radio telescopes sinks in just then and Iโm saddened that my brother is missing this tribute.
I find a seat with my name on a notecard and, beside it, one with the name of Amalia Bajaja, Estebanโs daughter. Esteban Bajaja was my fatherโs student. I heard his last name when I was a little girl. Other chairs are tagged with the names of Fernando Tauber (President of the National University of La Plata), Raรบl Kulichevsky (Executive Director of the National Commission on Space Activities), Raรบl Pardomo (Dean of the School of Astronomy and Geophysics of the National University of La Plata). I also see three chairs reserved for administrators of the United States Embassyโs Commission on the Environment, Science and Technology in Argentina. Decades ago, the Carnegie Institute gave generous financial assistance to build Antenna One. Other seats are occupied by young astronomers, recent graduates. I ask one of the women (who remain a minority among the men in this field) to take a few photos of me with the big antenna.
Antenna One was inaugurated in March, 1966. I was two years old at the time and Dad, then director of the institute, full professor of Physics in the School of Exact and Natural Sciences of the University of Buenos Aires and co-founder of the Astronomy program at the National University of La Plata, was thirty-two years old. Iโve been told that during my fatherโs keynote address at the opening ceremony, I could be heard shouting from my motherโs arms โThatโs Daddy, thatโs Daddy!โ
His various endeavors fill my mindโฆ IAR, Fate Electronics, the construction and operation of the aluminum factory ALUAR… I think back to earlier parts of his life, his high school years at the Nacional Buenos Aires, the scholarship he received to study Physical Engineering at the University of Colorado, his doctoral studies in Astrophysics at Harvard University, his postdoc in California, and his return to Argentina after living in the US for nine yearsโฆ I recall his appointment as a researcher and instructor at the University of London, where he was with my mother and my brother. I was conceived in England.
Seated facing the radio telescope that has been dubbed โAntenna Oneโ for fifty-three years and would soon be named Carlos M. Varsavsky, I hear Dr. Gustavo Romeroโs words. He gives an informal overview of the instituteโs history and contextualizes the event that has brought us together. โAfter many years during which our antennas havenโt had names, weโve decided to baptize Latin Americaโs first radio telescopes. This is an act of recognition of the men who took on a titanic task and whose immense perseverance brought it to completion. We have decided to baptize radio telescope one with the name Carlos Varsavsky in honor of the first director of the Argentine Radio Astronomy Institute, and radio telescope two with the name Esteban Bajaja to honor the scientist responsible for getting the second telescope up and running.โ
After the instituteโs administrators wrap up their speeches, they call Amalia Bajaja and me up to the stage. They uncover the plaques with the respective names of our fathers and they hand each of us a certificate and a 3D replica of the radio telescopes made by the instituteโs personal engineer.
I approach the microphone, holding back tears as I express my gratitude, gratitude on behalf of Dad. I know how much he loved IAR, itโs people, and the universe that could be seen and studied from the Southern Hemisphere. The research conducted made it possible for him to write the books Basics of Astronomy and Life in the Universe, which, in addition to his deliberations about the possibility of life on other planets and galaxies, has an unforgettable dedication: โTo Martin and Paula, two beings of another world.โ
The storm knew to hold off until the ceremony had concluded. We make our way to one of the cottages at the onset of the downpour. Time to eat, toast, talk, and relax. When the rain stops, I head toward the car awaiting to drive me home. I pass the main building and this time I decide to go inside. Itโs not as huge as it seemed when I was a girl. I remember the words that Dad jotted down for me to copy into the grey sketchbook: EARTH, MOON, SUN, SATURN, MARS, JUPITER, MERCURY, PLUTO, NEPTUNE, MOM, DAD, MARTIN, PAULA. I know I owe the IAR a debt of gratitude for being the place where I learned to write. As an author and journalist, I am eternally grateful.
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Libros de Paula Varsavsky/Books by Paula Varsavsky
Manuela Fingueretโ fue una escritora y periodista argentina, especialista en gestiรณn cultural.โ Era hija de inmigrantes lituanos.โ En sus escritos se refleja una fuerte connotaciรณn porteรฑa y judรญa. Colaborรณ con diversos medios grรกficos, nacionales y latinoamericanos. En 1993 fue directora artรญstica y de programaciรณn cultural de la emisora FM Jai (Buenos Aires), la primera radio judรญa de Amรฉrica Latina.En 1995 dirigiรณ la revista cultural Arca del Sur.โโ Entre 2000 y 2004 fue directora general de la Red de Bibliotecas Pรบblicas de la Ciudad de Buenos Aires.โ En 2000 asumiรณ como titular de la Direcciรณn del Libro y el Fomento de la Lectura, dependiente de la Secretarรญa de Cultura de la Ciudad de Buenos Aires.โ Entre 2005 y 2006 fue coordinadora general de Programas Culturales de Buenos Aires.โ Entre 2004 y 2006 fue directora de la Casa del Escritor y directora de la revista de literatura Gรบlliver.โ Durante muchos aรฑos integrรณ la Comisiรณn de Cultura de la Fundaciรณn del Libro, que anualmente organiza la Feria Internacional del Libro en Buenos Aires. Fue creadora de la Noche de las Librerรญas, y columnista de Caras y Caretas. Entre 2000 y 2010 publicรณ en varias editoriales sus reflexiones sobre la memoria y la barbarie, sus investigaciones educativas para transmitir el Holocausto judรญo y sobre la cuestiรณn de las dictaduras en Amรฉrica Latina.
___________________________
Manuela Fingueret was an Argentine writer and journalist, specialist in cultural management. She was the daughter of Lithuanian immigrants. In her writings a strong Buenos Aires and Jewish connection is reflected. She collaborated with various national and Latin American graphic media. In 1993, she was the artistic and cultural programming director of the FM Jai radio station (Buenos Aires), the most important Jewish radio station in Latin America, and in 1995, she directed the cultural magazine Arca del Sur. Between 2000 and 2004 she was general director of the Public Libraries Network of the City of Buenos Aires. In 2000 he assumed as head of the Directorate of Books and the Promotion of Reading, dependent on the Secretariat of Culture of the City of Buenos Aires. Between 2005 and 2006 she was general coordinator of Cultural Programs of Buenos Aires. Between 2004 and 2006, she was director of the Casa del Escritor and director of the literature magazine Gรบlliver. For many years, she was a member of the Culture Commission of the Book Foundation, which annually organizes the International Book Fair in Buenos Aires. She was the creator of the Night of the Libraries, and a columnist for Caras y Caretas. Between 2000 and 2010, she published in various editorials his reflections on memory and barbarism, her educational research in order to transmit the Jewish Holocaust and on the question of dictatorships in Latin America.
MI PADRE
No fue sabio
No fue justo
No fue valiente
Sรณlo un pobre carpintero judรญo
recorriendo el verano
en bicicleta
Detenido en Tolstoi
entre los cielos de Chagall
hacia la tierra prometida
Jerusalem fue un sueรฑo
que terminรณ en abandono
No fue mรบsico
No fue rabino
Ni fue maestro
Solo un padre carpintero judรญo
remontando la guerra
y el origin
para vivir a tiempo
en la palabra de la hija
____________________________________________
MY FATHER
He was not a wise man
He was not a righteous man
He was not a valiant man
Only a poor Jewish carpenter
traveling through summer
on a bicycle
Tarrying over Tolstoy
among the heavens of Chagall
towards the promised land
Jerusalem was a dream
that ended in abandonment
He was not a musician
He was not a rabbi
He was not a teacher
Only a poor Jewish carpenter
overcoming the war
and his origin
to live for eternity
through his daughter's words
Translation by Celeste Kostupolos-Cooperman
__________________________________
SEGUNDO RETRATO
Soy el silbido de la noche
que huye ante el ave cazadora
en una barca encallada
Una espera que descansa
en un รกrbol de Magritte
y acude salvaje
al llamado de su amo
cuando huele la lluvia en las axilas.
Un movimiento fugaz
antes de la siesta
cuando la telaraรฑa
teje las miradas del piel
Soy una pirata de abordajes continuos
que huele el pan casero
y los profana con un alarido
hasta devorar los pecados
--manzana quieta con los colores en el cuerpoโ
Un frรกgil cordรณn
que flota sin sobresaltos
o una pantera que asusta al desprevenido
y los devora en pequeรฑas vibraciones
para gozar del ritual
cada vez que su sangre es sacrificio
Soy la sobreviviente de alabanzas y exterminios
en una aldea en Lituania
que aรบn arde en la memorias
Una maga pรบrpura
a la que recitan salmos
y no desea despertarse
porque es tan blanca la maรฑana
y breve el encantamiento
que un resplandor la agita
Soy una flecha en el universo
que tiembla cuando un hijo crece
y cuyo destino
es un manto dorado de hojas secas
en un punto ascendiente de la vida lรกctea.
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SECOND PORTRAIT
I am the whistling of the night
that flees before the bird of prey
in a boat run aground
A sphere that rests
in a tree by Magritte
and savagely rushes in
at the call of the master
when he smells rain in his armpits.
A fleeting movement
before the siesta
when the cobweb
weaves glances into the skin.
I am a pirate of constant boardings
who smells homemade bread
and profanes it with a scream
until the skins are devoured
--peaceful apple with colors on its bodyโ
A fragile cord
that floats without fright
or a panther that frightens the unprepared
and devours him in small vibrations
to enjoy the ritual
each time his blood is a sacrifice
I am the survivor of prayers and exterminations
in a Lithuanian village
that still burns in memory
A purple enchantress
to whom they recite psalms
and who does not wish to awaken
because morning is so white
and enchantment so brief
that a flash of light can stir her
I am an arrow in the universe
that trembles when a child grows
and whose destiny
is a golden mantle of dry leaves
in an ascendent point of the Milky Way.
Translation by Roberta Gordenstein
Soy una flecha en el universo
que tiembla cuando un hijo crece
y cuyo destino
es un manto dorado de hojas secas
en un punto ascendiente de la vida lรกctea.
____________________________________________________
____________________________________
TOU-VABOU
A Eliahu Toker, A Hรฉctor Yรกnover
Jehovรก evoca los signos prometidos
para evitar a los vivos
su espanto cotidiano
รบnicos espectadores
anรณnimos y perversos
de un pueblo
que arrastra
el milagro y la duda
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TOVU-VAVOHU
To Eliahu Toker, to Hรฉctor Yรกnover
Jehovah evokes the promised signs
to avoid the quotidian fright
of the living
the only witnesses
anonymous people
who carry with them
miracles and doubt
Translation by Roberta Gordenstern
_______________________________________________
GรNESIS (CAP. VII. VERS. 5)
Vinieron, pues, con Noรฉ al arca
De dos en dos de toda carne
Que habรญa espรญritu de vida.
Se sentaron uno al frente del otro
Y por primera vez se reconocieron
Comenzaban a caer las primeras gotas
Talladas y precisas
Las semientes hervรญan con el contacto
Y se colmaron los surcos de maravillas anegadas
Las manadas
Sobre los รกrboles que cubrรญan sus lamentos
Y todo fue otra vez como el comienzo
Una lรญnea verde continรบa y trasparente
Donde el silencio era sonido perecedero.
________________________________________________
GENESIS (CAP. VII. VERS. 5)
They came, then, with Noah
two by two all flesh in
which there was the spirit of life.
They sat down one in front of the other
And for the first time they recognized each other.
the first drops began to fall
carved and precise.
Semen boiled with the contact
And furrows were filled to the brim with flooded marvels.
I sweep the sidewalk, over and over again, in the summer
Afternoons
barefoot like the shikses* I the neighborhood.
My mother curses, because she fears an
early assimilation.
*Yiddish, young non-Jewish girls.
Translation by Roberta Gordenstein
______________________________________________
Estos poemas son de/These poems are from: Marjorie Agosรญn, ed. Miriam’s Daughters: Jewish Latin American Jewish Poets. Santa Fe, NM: Sherman Asher, 2001.
_______________________________________________
Manuela Fingueret–Poesรญa/Poetry: 1975: Tumultos contenidos./ 1977: Heredarรกs Babel. / 1980: La piedra es una llaga en el tiempo. / 1984: Ciudad en fuga y otros infiernos. / 1988: Eva y las mรกscaras. / 1992: Los huecos de tu cuerpo. / 1998: Uva y racimo. / 2001: Esquina./ 2009: Fรกbulas con moraleja/ 2010: La vida espuma, muestra con la artista visual Mirta Kupferminc.
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Algunos libros de Manuela Fingueret/Some of Manuela Fingueret’s Books
SATZ, MARIO (1944โ), poeta, autor y ensayista argentino y espaรฑol. Naciรณ en Coronel Pringles, Argentina. Sus extensos viajes tuvieron una influencia significativa en su escritura. Viviรณ en Israel durante tres aรฑos y desde 1978 vive en Barcelona, โโEspaรฑa. Satz es un prolรญfico autor de poesรญa y obras de narrativa y no ficciรณn que incluyen libros sobre la Cabalรก y la historia judรญa. Su primera poesรญa estรก รญntimamente relacionada con el mundo natural. Examina la belleza y el poder de la naturaleza en prรกcticamente todas sus manifestaciones terrenales. Las obras de no ficciรณn del autor revelan su interรฉs por la historia y el misticismo judรญos y son evidencia de su capacidad para un pensamiento teolรณgico profundo. Entre los textos representativos en esta lรญnea se encuentran Poรฉtica de la Kรกbala (1985), Judaรญsmo: 4.000 aรฑos de cultura (1982) y El dador alegre: ensayos de Kรกbala (1997), ademรกs de autor de una vasta serie novelรญstica titulada Planetario, que consta de cinco novelas que componen un sistema solar textual. Las novelas Sol (1976), Luna (1977) y Tierra (1978) forman una trilogรญa en la que el autor utiliza las ciudades de Jerusalรฉn y Cuzco, Perรบ, como lugares para examinar la historia y la cultura latinoamericanas junto con la tradiciรณn judรญa. Las novelas posteriores, Marte (1980) y Mercurio (1990), no continรบan la historia de la trilogรญa aunque forman parte del proyecto Planetario. Su libro Tres cuentos espaรฑoles (1988) adquiere una perspectiva mucho mรกs centrada con el retrato de la Espaรฑa multicultural del siglo XIII en la que las culturas cristiana, musulmana y judรญa existieron y prosperaron una al lado de la otra. La novela Azahar (1996) continรบa con la misma se centra en Iberia, esta vez con un enfoque en las tradiciones religioso-mรญsticas desde la Cabalรก hasta El Libro de los Muertos de Tibet.
Adaptado de Jewish Virtual Learning.
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SATZ, MARIO (1944โ ), Argentine-Spanish poet, author, and essayist. He was born in Coronel Pringles, Argentina. His extensive travels had significant influence on his writing. He lived in Israel for three years and from 1978 he lived in Barcelona, Spain. Satz is a prolific author of poetry, and narrative and nonfiction works that include books about Kabbalah and Jewish history. His early poetry is intimately connected to the natural world. He examines the beauty and power of nature in practically all its earthly manifestations. The author’s nonfiction works reveal his interest in Jewish history and mysticism and are evidence of his capability for profound theological thinking. Representative texts in this vein include Poรฉtica de la Kรกbala (1985), Judaรญsmo: 4,000 aรฑos de cultura (1982), and El dador alegre: ensayos de Kรกbala (1997).He is also the author of a vast novelistic series titled Planetarium, which consists of five novels that comprise a textual solar system. The novels Sol (1976), Luna (1977), and Tierra (1978) form a trilogy in which the author utilizes the cities of Jerusalem and Cuzco, Peru, as sites for examining Latin American history and culture together with Jewish tradition. The subsequent novels, Marte (1980) and Mercurio (1990), do not continue the story of the trilogy though they are part of the Planetarium project. His book Tres cuentos espaรฑoles (1988) takes on a much more focused perspective with the portrayal of multicultural 13th century Spain in which Christian, Muslim, and Jewish cultures existed and thrived side by side.. The novel Azahar (1996) continues with the same focus on Iberia, this time with a focus on religious-mystical traditions from Kabbalah to The Book of the Dead from Tibet.
–El perdรณn es una flauta de dos bocasโdijo el Rabรญ Lo Iadรบa, el Desconocido, a su discรญpulo Daniel.
–ยฟTe refieres a la flauta doble de los griegos, al aulรณs o caramillo?โinterrogรณ Daniel.
–Me refiero al perdรณn, tan difรญcil y tan necesario.
Viajaban al Qumram para visitar las ruinas del antiguo monasterio de los esenios. En esa รฉpoca crecรญan lirios en el desierto y los wadis murmuraban aguas humildes, ecos de las pasadas lluvias. En Jรฉrico, el gran oasis extendรญa sus verdes redes de cultivos, sus altas palmas. Ligeramente triste, el Desconocido prosiguiรณ:
–Podemos perdonar si, a nuestra vez somos perdonados. Por eso el perdรณn es una flauta de dos bocas: no importa quien imprima el soplo de la mรบsica y quien la deje salir al aire del mundo. No importa quien haya herido primero ni tampoco la causa que motivรณ la agresiรณn, el desprecio, la cruel ironรญa, la pequeรฑa o gran traiciรณn. La mรบsica del perdรณn es un tiempo que fluye para curar las llagas de aquรฉl que fuera detenido, falseado, deformado por nuestros actos.
–De modo que no bastaโterciรณ Daniel, tratando de aclarar las oscuras enseรฑanzas del maestroโcon que pidamos perdรณn, pues si el otro o la otra no nos responden, a su vez, con su pedido de perdรณn, el milagro de la reconciliaciรณn no se produce, ยฟverdad?
–Para las amarguras de la vida la flauta tiene ocho orificios, siete arriba y uno abajo. Los de arriba son nuestros sentidos-ojos, oรญdos, fosas nasales y boca–: el octavo hace vibrar el ombligo, sitio de transfiguraciรณn, huella de nuestra ligazรณn con el pasado de la especie, marca fraterna para todos. Perdonar es difรญcil porque quien expresa sus afectos, nunca sabe cuรกndo ni cรณmo serรกn recibidos y mal habituados, orgullosos, queremos una respuesta inmediata a nuestros actos, efectos visibles de nuestros actos invisibles. Quien pida perdรณn debe, antes, reconocer su error, lo equรญvoco de sus intenciones. Hay perdรณn autรฉntico cuando el fallo es reconocido y no se lo cubre con el polvo del engreimiento ni con la seda de omnipotencia. Ninguno de nosotros es tan perfectoโen relaciรณn al prรณjimo para pronunciar-esa horrible frase: es cosa suya.
Frente al Mar Muerto, los ojos de los viajeros parpadearon deslumbrados por una luz mineral. Por fuera, se hallaban en el punto mรกs bajo de la tierra. Por dentro, en cambio, Daniel y el Desconocido subรญan en melodรญas de flauta solar hacia las dos bocas del horizonte, el este y el oeste.
โPardon is a flute with two mouths,โ is a flute with two mouths,โ said Rabbi Lo Yadua, the Unknown One to his disciple Daniel.
โAre you referring the flute of the Greeks, the aulos, with its double reed or the pipes,โ asked Daniel.
โI am referring to pardon, so difficult and so necessary.
They were traveling to Qumran to visit the ruins of the ancient monastery of the Essenes. At this time of year, lilies were growing in the desert, and the wadis humble waters murmured, echoes of past rains. In Jericho, the great oasis extended its green cultivated webs, its tall palm trees. A bit sad, the Unknown proceeded: โWe can pardon, if in turn, we are pardoned. For that reason, pardon is a flute with two mouths; it doesnโt matter who makes the sound of the music and who lets it go out to the world. It doesnโt matter who was hurt first nor even the cause that motivated the aggression, the slight, the cruel irony, the small or great betrayal. The music of pardon is a time that flows to cure the wounds of whom was detained, misled, deformed by our acts.โ
โSo, then it is not enough,โ Daniel commented, trying to interpret the obscure teachings of the master, โ that we ask for pardon, because if the other person doesnโt respond to us, in turn,with a request for pardon, the miracle of reconciliation doesnโt take place, right?”
โFor the bitter parts of life, the flute has eight orifices, seven above and one below. Those above are our senses-eyes, ears, nostrils and mouth-: the eighth causes the vibration of the naval; place of transfiguration the source of our link with the past of the species, fraternal marking for everyone. To pardon is difficult because whoever expresses his feelings, never knows when or how they will be received, and not in the habit, proud, we want an immediate response to our acts, invisible effects to our invisible acts. Whoever may ask for pardon should, before doing so, recognize his error, the mistake in his intentions. There is authentic pardon when the mistake is recognized and not covered by the dust of vanity or with the silk of omnipotence. None of us is so perfect to be able to pronounce-in relation to our neighbor-that horrible phrase: itโs your problem.
Facing the Dead Sea, the travelersโ eyes blinked, dazzled by the mineral light. Outside, they found themselves in the lowest point on earth, Inside, in contrast, Daniel and the Unknown One rose with melodies of a solar flute toward the two mouths of the horizon, the east and the west.
Translation by Stephen A. Sadow
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Algunos de los libros sobre la Cรกbala de Mario Satz/Some of the books about the Kabbalah by Mario Satz
Marcos Aguinis es un autor con amplia formaciรณn internacional en literatura, neurocirugรญa, psicoanรกlisis, artes e historia. “He viajado por el mundo, pero tambiรฉn he viajado por diferentes profesiones”. Aguinis naciรณ en Cรณrdoba, Argentina en 1935, hijo de inmigrantes judรญos. Tenรญa siete aรฑos cuando llegรณ la noticia de que los nazis habรญan matado a su abuelo y al resto de su familia que se habรญa quedado en Europa. รl describe esto como el momento fundamental de su vida, y uno que finalmente lo llevรณ a escribir en un esfuerzo por cerrar esa herida, para reparar el โmecanismo roto de la humanidadโ. Publicรณ su primer libro en 1963 y desde entonces ha escrito trece novelas, catorce colecciones de ensayos, cuatro colecciones de cuentos y dos biografรญas. La mayorรญa de ellos se han convertido en bestsellers y han generado entusiasmo y controversia. El Sr. Aguinis fue el primer autor fuera de Espaรฑa en recibir el prestigioso Premio Planeta por su libro “La Cruz Invertida” y su novela superventas “Contra la Inquisiciรณn” ha sido traducida a varios idiomas y elogiada por el Premio Nobel Mario Vargas Llosa como “Conmovedor canto de libertad” โฆ.
del sitio web de Marcos Aguinis
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Marcos Aguinis is an author with extensive international training in literature, neurosurgery, psychoanalysis, the arts, and history. “I have traveled the world, but I have also traveled by different professions.” Aguinis was born in Cรณrdoba, Argentina in 1935, the son of Jewish immigrants. He was seven years old when the news came that the Nazis had killed his grandfather and the rest of his family who had remained in Europe. He describes this as the pivotal moment in his life, and one that ultimately led him to write in an effort to close that wound, to repair the “broken mechanism of humanity.” He published his first book in 1963 and since then he has written thirteen novels, fourteen essay collections, four short story collections, and two biographies. Most of them have become bestsellers and have generated excitement and controversy. Mr. Aguinis was the first author outside of Spain to receive the prestigious Planeta Prize for his book “The Inverted Cross” and his best-selling novel “Against the Inquisition” has been translated into several languages โโand praised by Nobel Prize winner Mario Vargas Llosa as a “moving song of freedom” โฆ.
Mugre, piel y huesos, con los tobillos y las muรฑecas ulceradas, por los grilletes, Francisco es una braza que arde bajo los escombros. Los jueces miran con fastidio a ese esperpento: un incordio decididamente intolerable.
Hace diez aรฑo que lo han enterrado en las cรกrceles secretos. Lo sometieron a interrogatorios y privaciones. Lo enfrentaron con eruditos en sonoras controversias. Lo humillaron y amenazaron, pero Francisco Maldonado da Silva no cediรณ. Ni a los dolores fรญsicos ni a las presiones espirituales. Los tenaces inquisidores sudan rabia porque no quieren enviarlo a la hoguera sin arrepentimiento ni temor.
Cuando seis aรฑos atrรกs el reo afectรณ un ayuno rebelde que casi lo disolviรณ en cadรกver, los inquisidores ordenaron hacerle comer a la fuerza, darle vino y pasteles; no toleraban que ese gusano les arrebatarse la decisiรณn de su fin. Francisco Maldonado da Silva tardรณ en recuperarse, pero logrรณ demonstrar a sus verdugos que podรญa sufrir no menos que un santo.
En su maloliente mazmorra el estragado prisionero suele evocar su odisea, Naciรณ en 1592, exactamente un siglo despuรฉs de que los judรญos fueron expulsados de Espaรฑa y Colรณn descubriera las Indias Occidentales. Vio la luz en el remoto oasis de Ibatรญn, en su casa predominaba el color pastel con manchones de azul. Luego se trasladรณ a Cรณrdoba precipitadamente. Huรญan de una persecuciรณn que pronto les darรญa alcance. Navegรณ por tierras amenazadas: indios, pumas, ladrones, alucinantes salinas. Cuando cumpliรณ nueve aรฑos, arrestaron a su padre en un desgarrador operativo. Un aรฑo despuรฉs del hogar a su hermano mayor. Llegรณ a las once, y ya no quedaban en su vivienda bienes que no hubieran sido investigados y malvendidos por las implacables autoridades. Su madre, vencida, casi loca, se entregรณ a la muerte.
El llagado adolescente completรณ su educaciรณn en un convento: leรญa la Biblia y soรฑaba con una reparaciรณn aรบn inconfesable. Salvรณ a un apoplรฉjico, cabalgรณ por los portentosas serranรญas de Cรณrdoba y conociรณ las flagelaciones mรกs absurdas.
Antes de cumplir dieciocho aรฑos decidiรณ partir para Lima para graduarse de mรฉdico en la Universidad de San Marcos. Allรญ anhelaba re-encontrarse con su padre, todavรญa vivo ver baldado por las torturas de la Inquisiciรณn. Su viaje de miles de kilรณmetros en carretera y en mula lo llevรณ desde las infinitas pampas del Sur a la helada puna del Norte. Alternรณ con inesperadas acompaรฑantes e hizo descubrimientos que le cambiaron la visiรณn de su identidad. Descendiรณ a la deslumbrante Lima, llamada Ciudad de los Reyes, para recibir la revelaciรณn final. Allรญ, ademรกs del encuentro dramรกtico con su padre, conociรณ a Martรญn Porres, el primer santo negro de Amรฉrica, participรณ en las defensas de Callao contra el pirata holandรฉs Spilpergen y se graduรณ en una brillante ceremonia.
La persecuciรณn, que habรญa empezado en Ibatรญn y siguiรณ en Cรณrdoba, volviรณ a enardecerse en Lima. Decidiรณ entonces embarcar hacia Chile: era un eterno fugitivo. Allรญ logrรณ ser contratado como cirujano mayor del hospital de Santiago, porque era el primer profesional con tรญtulos legรญtimos que llegaba al paรญs. Su biblioteca personal superaba todas las colecciones existentes en conventos o reparticiones pรบblicas. Visitรณ salones y palacios, alternรณ con autoridades civiles y religiosas, recibiรณ halagos por su cultura. Y se casรณ con una hermosa mujer. Llegรณ a ser exitoso y apreciado; su bienestar reparaba la cadena de padecimientos anteriores.
Un hombre comรบn no habrรญa alterado esta situaciรณn. Pero en su espรญritu llameaba un tizรณn inextinguible, un rebeliรณn que ascendรญa desde los abismos. Sabรญa que otra gente, como รฉl, deambulaba por el mundo sosteniendo sus creencias en secreto. Era difรญcil, conflictivo, indigno. Contra la lรณgica de la conveniencia, optรณ por quitarse la mรกscara y defender sus derechos de manera frontal. Hasta entonces habรญa sido un hipรณcrita, un marrano.
Filthy, skin and bones, with his ankles and wrists ulcerated by the shackles. Francisco is a hot coal the burns under the rubble. The judges look with annoyance at that grotesque sight: a decidedly intolerable nuisance.
Ten years have passed since they have buried gun in the secret prisons. They submitted him to interrogations and privations. The confronted him with scholars in sonorous arguments. They humiliated and threatened him, but Francisco Maldonado da Silva did not give in. Neither the physical pains nor the spiritual pressures. The persistent inquisitors sweated rage because they didnโt want to send him to the stake without repentance or fear.
When, six years back, the prisoner affected a rebellious fast that almost dissolved him into a cadaver, the Inquisitors ordered that he be forcefully, giving him wine and cakes; they couldnโt tolerate that this worm snatch from them the decision of when he would die. Fernando Maldonado da Silva was slow to recuperate, but he was successful in demonstrating to executioners that could suffer no less than a saint.
In his ill-smelling dungeon, the ravaged prisoner continued to think about his odyssey, He was born in 1692, exactly a century after the Jews were expelled from Spain and Columbus discovered the West Indies. He was born in the remote oasis of Ibatรญn. In his house, pastel colors predominated with large blotches of blue. Then then the family hastily moved to Cรณrdoba. They fled a persecution that quickly caught up with them. They navigated through threatening territories: Indians, pumas, thieves, saline hallucinations. When he turned nine, the arrested his father in a heartbreaking operation. A year later they removed his older brother by force from their home. They arrived at home at eleven, and in their dwelling, no longer remained things that had not been investigated and sold cheaply by the implacable authorities.
The suffering adolescent complete his education in a convent. He read the Bible and dreamed of a reparation not yet mentionable. He saved an apoplectic, he rode his horse through the marvelous mountains of Cรณrdoba, and he encountered the most absurd flagellations.
Before he turned eighteen, he decided to leave for Lime to graduate as a physician from the University of San Marcos. He yearned to find his father, still alive, XXX crippled by the tortures of the Inquisition. His voyage of thousands by road and by mule carried him from the infinite pampas of the South to the frozen puna of the North. Hi mingled with unexpected companions and he made discoveries that changed his vision of his identity. He descended to the dazzling Lima, called the City of Kings, to receive the final revelation. There, besides the dramatic meeting with his father, he met Martรญn de Porres, the first black saint of the Americas, participated in the defense of Callao against the Dutch pirate and he graduated in a splendid ceremony
The persecution, that had begun in Ibatรญn and continued in Cรณrdoba, blazed again in Lima. He then decided to embark for Chile: he was an eternal fugitive. There, he was able get a contract as the chief surgeon in the Santiago hospital, because he was the first professional with legitimate titles who arrived in the country. His personal library surpassed all the existing collections in convents or public distributions. He visited salons and palaces, socialized with civil and religious authorities, received praise for his culture. And he married a beautiful woman. He became successful and highly regarded; his wellbeing repaired the chain of earlier afflictions.
An average man would not have changed this arrangement. But his spirit burned in an inextinguishable ember a rebellion that ascended from the abysm, He knew that other people like himself wandered through the world, maintaining their beliefs in secret. It was difficult, unsettling, shameful. Against the logic of advantage, he opted to take off his mask and defend his rights in a head-on manner. Until then, he had been a hypocrite, a marrano.
Gerardo Lewin naciรณ en 1955 en l Buenos Aires (donde reside), la Argentina. Recibiendo el tรญtulo de Actor Nacional egresรณ en 1980 de la Escuela Nacional de Arte Dramรกtico. Establecido en Israel, cursa en 1984 estudios de Mรกster en Direcciรณn Teatral en la Universidad de Tel Aviv. En Buenos Aires, a travรฉs de IUNA (Instituto Universitario Nacional del Arte) obtiene en 2004 su Licenciatura en Actuaciรณn. Entre 1977 y 1981 actuรณ, entre otros, en los espectรกculos โAlicia a travรฉs del espejoโ de Lewis Carroll, โLa pirรกmideโ de Oscar Feijรณo, โEl hรฉroe de la Samobrooneโ de Jacobo Greber, en la Argentina, y entre 1983 y 1985 en โVรญctor, o los niรฑos al poderโ de Roger Vitrac y โLos inmigrantesโ de Slavomir Mroczek, en Israel. Incursionรณ como actor en televisiรณn, filmes de corto y largometraje y publicidad. Durante 1986 realizรณ locuciรณn en producciones cinematogrรกficas. Y en los paรญses citados ha ejercido la docencia teatral en instituciones privadas y pรบblicas. En el gรฉnero dramaturgia concibiรณ la farsa policial โNieblas del Tรกmesisโ. Su poemario publicado es โAmores muertosโ (2003). Inรฉditos permanecen โTrรกnsitoโ y โNombre impropioโ. Poemas suyos fueron traducidos al portuguรฉs por Roxana Lewin. Es el traductor, por ejemplo, del poemario โVagoโ de Tal Nitzan (Estados Unidos, 2012), โUna novela vienesaโ de David Vogel, Barcelona, Espaรฑa, 2013), โAntologรญa de cuentosโ (selecciรณn del Instituto para la Traducciรณn de Literatura Hebrea (ITHL): textos de Yossi Birstein, Yitzhak Orpaz, Etgar Keret, Reuven Miran, Alex Epstein, Dan Tsalka y Amรณs Oz), ademรกs de traducciones socializadas en revistas y periรณdicos de Mรฉxico. En 2007 fundรณ http://decantasion.blogspot.com.ar: โUn blog de traducciones de poesรญa hebrea de acรก y allรก, de ahora y de otroraโ. Entre 2002 y 2007 fue uno de los coordinadores del ciclo de poesรญa โEl Orate y La Musaโ.
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Gerardo Lewin was born in 1955 in Buenos Aires (where he resides), Argentina. Receiving the title of National Actor, he graduated in 1980 from the National School of Dramatic Art. Established in Israel, in 1984 he studied a Master’s Degree in Theater Directing at the University of Tel Aviv. In Buenos Aires, through IUNA (National University Institute of Art) he obtained his Bachelor’s Degree in Acting in 2004. Between 1977 and 1981 he acted, among others, in the shows “Alice: Through the Looking Glass” by Lewis Carroll, “The Pyramid” by Oscar Feijรณo, “The Hero of the Samobroone” by Jacobo Greber, in Argentina, and between 1983 and 1985 in “Victor, or Children to Power” by Roger Vitrac and “The Immigrants” by Slavomir Mroczek, in Israel. He ventured as an actor in television, short and feature films and advertising. During 1986 he made a voiceover in film productions. And in the aforementioned countries he has exercised theatrical teaching in private and public institutions. In the dramaturgy genre he conceived the police farce “Mists of the Thames”. His published collection of poems is “Dead Amores” (Buenos Aires, 2003). His poems were translated into Portuguese by Roxana Lewin. He is the translator, for example, of the collection of poems “Vago” by Tal Nitzan (United States, 2012), “Una novela Vienesa” by David Vogel (E Barcelona, โโSpain, 2013), “Anthology of Stories โ(selection of the Institute for the Translation of Hebrew Literature (ITHL): texts by Yossi Birstein, Yitzhak Orpaz, Etgar Keret, Reuven Miran, Alex Epstein, Dan Tsalka and Amรณs Oz), as well as translations in magazines and newspapers of Mexico. In 2007 he founded rhttp://decantasion.blogspot.com.ar: โA blog of translations of Hebrew poetry from here and there, now and in the pastโ. Between 2002 and 2007 he was one of the coordinators of the poetry cycle “El Orate y La Musa”.
Stella Sidinaciรณ en Sofรญa, Bulgaria, junto a sus padres iniciaron un รฉxodo por la persecuciรณn nazi, un largo viaje hasta Buenos Aires. Argentina, donde tenรญan parientes.
Allรญ se establecieron. Atravรฉs de un cuaderno, bitรกcora de viaje de su mamรก se generรณ una gran muestra sobre la epopeya familiar, en Argentina y en Bulgaria, auspiciada por la Vice-presidente de su paรญs de nacimiento (2016/2019)
Estudiรณ en las Escuelas Nacionales de Bellas ARTES obteniendo el tรญtulo de profesora. Completรณ sus estudios con diferentes seminarios. Coordina su estudio de enseรฑanza artรญstica desde el aรฑo 1983. Participรณ en numerosas Ferias Nacionales e Internacionales. Concursรณ en gran cantidad de Salones Nacionales e Internacionales, tambiรฉn por Internet. Integrรณ muchas muestras colectivas en el paรญs y el exterior. Obtuvo 20 Premios. Columnista de Artes Plรกsticas desde 1995. A partir de 1999 dirige y produce su propio programa dedicado a las Artes Visuales. Actualmente en www.conexionabierta.com.ar, sรกbados de 4 a 5 pm hora argentina.
Stella Sidi was born in Sofia, Bulgaria, together with her family, made an exodus from Nazi persecution and a long voyage to Buenos Aires. Argentina, where they had relatives.
They settled there. Through a notebook, the travel diary of her mother, a great exhibition was created about the family epic, in Argentina and in Bulgaria, sponsored by the vice president of his country of birth (2016/2019)
She studied at the National Schools of Fine Arts obtaining the title of teacher. She completed her studies with different seminars. Since 1983, She has coordinated her workshop for art study since 1983. She participated in numerous National and International Art Fairs. She participated in a large number of National and International Salons and also online.She joined many group exhibitions in the country and abroad. She obtained 20 Awards.Stella Sidi has been an Arts Columnist since 1995. Since 1999 he directs and produces her own program dedicated to the Visual Arts. Currently at www.conexionabierta.com.ar , Saturdays from 4 to 5 pm Argentine time.
Con motivo del 90 aniversario del establecimiento de relaciones diplomรกticas entre Bulgaria y Argentina por invitaciรณn del Instituto Estatal de Cultura al Ministro de Relaciones Exteriores Fondo Nacional de Endowion “13 Siglos Bulgaria” presenta la exposiciรณn “Tour del Mundo por 270 Dรญas” de Stella Sidi en el Ministerio de Relaciones Exteriores. La exposiciรณn forma parte de la colecciรณn de NDF “13 Siglos Bulgaria”. Se presenta por primera vez en 2019 bajo el patrocinio de la Sra. Iliana Yotova, Vicepresidenta de la Repรบblica de Bulgaria, en el Salรณn “Prof. Dr.Sc.(Econ.) Vasil Gerov” del Fondo.
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On the occasion of the 90th anniversary of the establishment of diplomatic relations between Bulgaria and Argentina at the invitation of the State Institute of Culture to the Minister of Foreign Affairs National Endowion Fund “13 Centuries Bulgaria” presents the exhibition “World Tour for 270 Days” by Stella Sidi in the Ministry of Foreign Relations. The exhibition is part of the NDF collection “13 Centuries Bulgaria”. It is presented for the first time in 2019 under the patronage of Ms Iliana Yotova, Vice President of the Republic of Bulgaria, in the “Prof. Dr.Sc. (Econ.) Vasil Gerov” Hall of the Fund.
La vuelta al mundo en 270 dรญas/Around the World in 270 Days — Libro de artista/Artist’s Book
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Proyecto de valorizaciรณn de la memoria vivida y recreada con el presente en forma cinematogrรกfica, mixturando soportes,tรฉcnicas, hechos y palabras no lineales. Un cuaderno, bitรกcora de viaje escrito en francรฉs, del viaje de 9 meses de Sofรญa (Bulgaria) a Buenos Aires que realicรฉ junto a mis padres en รฉpoca de crisis causada por la guerra mundial, es el disparador. bordamos paรญses como Turquรญa, Irรกn, Irak, India, China Japรณn, Hawaii, Estados Unidos. Atravesamos desiertos, mares, en barcos colmados de soldados, transcurriendo dรญas en distintos puertos hasta conseguir nuevos destinos, sin pasajes definitivos. El viaje fuรฉ concebido a travรฉs del ocรฉano Pacรญfico y no del Atlรกntico. . . Una aventura emprendida con ansias de arribar a un destino seguro y esperanzador. Un reconocimiento al paรญs cobijador,Argentina, y sobre todo revalorizar una epopeya moderna desde un objetivo simple como vivir en paz.
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A project of that valued the lived and recreated memory and with the present in cinematographic form, mixing supports, techniques, words and words in linear format. A notebook, a travel booklet written in French, of a 9-month trip from Sofia, Bulgaria to Buenos Aires, held together by my parents during the crisis caused by the World War, is the trigger. We touch on countries like Turkey, Iran, Irak, India, China Japan, Hawaii, United States. We cross deserts, seas, in the thatched boats of soldiers, spending days in different ports until we reach new destinations, without definitive passages. The journey was conceived across the Pacific Ocean, and not in the Atlantic. . . An adventure undertaken with the desire to arrive at a safe and hopeful destiny. A recognition of the coveted country, Argentina, and above all, giving new value to a modern epic from a simple objective like living in peace.
GRACIELA SHVARTZMAN (TOVA) es Licenciada en Sociologรญa por la Universidad de Buenos Aires y Licenciada en Historia Judรญa por el Instituto de Ciencias Judรญas de Buenos Aires. Ha sido profesora universitaria en Psicoanรกlisis en la Universidad de Buenos Aires, y otras Universidades, Ha ocupado cargos de direcciรณn en la comunidad judรญa en Argentina, asรญ como en programas nacionales y de Naciones Unidas (PNUD). Ha colaborado activamente en el tratamiento de las vรญctimas del atentado a la Embajada de Israel en Argentina, y de las vรญctimas del atentado de Amia en Buenos Aires y ha formado parte de la Comisiรณn de Investigaciรณn de la DAIA sobre los judรญos desaparecidos durante la dictadura. Ha impartido conferencias en Madrid, Jerusalรฉn, Tel Aviv, etc. y ha escrito artรญculos sobre cultura y mitos judรญos. Ha publicado โDe Grietas y Entretantosโ (libro de poesรญa). Ha realizado libros de artista (โEn cualquier aquรญโ, โEvanescenciaโ) y aรบn investiga este campo. Ha sido parte de LABA BA desde el principio, enseรฑando fuentes judรญas.
GRACIELA SHVARTZMAN (TOVA) has a degree in Sociology from the University of Buenos Aires, and a degree in Jewish History from the Institute of Jewish Sciences of Buenos Aires. She has been a university teacher in Psychoanalysis in the University of Buenos Aires, and others Universities, She has held positions of direction in the Jewish community in Argentina, as well as in national programs and the United Nations (UNDP). She has actively collaborated in the treatment of the victims of the attack on the Israeli Embassy in Argentina, and of the victims of the Amia attack in Buenos Aires and has been part of the DAIA Commission of Investigation on the disappeared Jews during the dictatorship. She has given conferences in Madrid, Jerusalem, Tel Aviv, etc. and has written articles on Jewish culture and myths. She has published โDe Grietas y Entretantosโ (poetry book). She has made artistยดs books (โEn cualquier aquรญโ, โEvanescenciaโ) and still investigates this field. She has been part of LABA BA from the beginning, teaching Jewish sources.
Perla Bajder es licenciada en las artes visuales y es especialista en la administraciรณn cultural. Estudiรณ en la Escuela Nacional de Bellas Artes y la Universidad de Barcelona. Exhibiรณ su obra y dio clases en Cรณrdoba, Mendoza, Rรญo Negro (Argentina), Barcelona, Biesko Biala, Krackow and Torun (Polonia), Boston, Washington, D.C. (USA), Cappadocia (Turquรญa), Edinborough, Essex (Reino Unido), Florencia, Urbino (Itaia), Kazakhstan Mรฉxico D.F., La Havana, Quito, Santiago Transylvania (Romania), Y Vilnius (Lituania). Museos en muchos es esos lugares guardan sus obras. En 2018 fue invitada para dar seminario con producciรณn en el instituto de Bellas Artes y una exhibiciรณn en la galerรญa Meiki Meghara de Tetuรกn y presentar mi libro Un paรญs de maravillas en la Universidad de Tetuรกn en el marco del XIII Encuentro Internacional de escritoras homenaje a Fatima Mernisi. Ese libro fue presentado en el mismo aรฑo en el Museo del Libro y de la Lengua por las escritoras Susana Cella Silvia Martinez de Delucchi y el acadรฉmico Dr Emilio Josรฉ Burucua.2019 invitada a exhibir โThe Other, The Sameโ en el Museo Grebocin de la ciudad Medieval de Torun, Polonia,Estaba programada la muestra en la galerรญa de la Universidad de Poznan.En 2020 fue seleccionada mi serie โFamilia de Bacterias Erรณticas Americanas para participar de la exhibiciรณn art week organizada por la Universidad de POZNAN y la Universidad de GRANADA. En 2021 enviรฉ pequeรฑos trabajos sobre Diversity; y el Small Graphic Bienal para Interart Foundation, Aiud, Rumania. Participarรฉ con ellos en el programa artista en residence August 2021.
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Perla Bajder earned a degree in visual arts and is a specialist in cultural administration. She studied at the National Schools of Fine Arts and at theUniversity of Barcelona. She exhibited her work and gave classes in Cรณrdoba, Mendoza, Rรญo Negro (Argentina), Barcelona, Biesko Biala, Krackow and Torun (Poland), Boston, Washington, D.C. (USA), Cappadocia (Turkey), Edinborough, Essex (United Kingdom), Florencia, Urbino (Italy), Kazakhstan Mรฉxico City., Havana, Quito, Santiago (Chile), Transylvania (Romania), Y Vilnius (Lithuania). Museums in many of these places show her Works .In2018 she was invited to give a seminar with production at the Institute of Fine Arts and an exhibition at the Meiki Meghara Gallery in Tetuan and present my book A country of wonders at the University of Tetuan in the framework of the XIII International Meeting of Writers homage to Fatima Mernisi. That book was presented in the same year at the Museum of the Book and Language by the writers Susana Cella Silvia Martinez de Delucchi and the academic Dr Emilio Josรฉ Burucua. 2019 invited to exhibit โThe Other, The Sameโ at the Grebocin Museum of the Medieval city of Torun, Poland, The exhibition was scheduled in the gallery of the University of Poznan. In 2020 my series “Family of American Erotic Bacteria was selected to participate in the art week exhibition organized by the University of POZNAN and the University of GRANADA.In 2021 I sent small papers on Diversity; and the Small Graphic Biennial for Interart Foundation, Aiud, Romania. I will participate with them in the artist program in residence August 2021.
La Torรก dice: El hombre es un รกrbol del campo. Como el รกrbol arraigado a la tierra, son las emociones las que expresan nuestra profundidad . Asegurar al igual que los รกrboles nuestro arraigo en el sustento espiritual depende de nuestra conexiรณn profunda con nuestra esencia. Al igual que el รกrbol, tenemos raรญces, tronco y frutos. Las raices no son visibles y estรกn profundamente enterradas, son las que dan vida al arbol.
Tenemos una parte invisible: la fe, es la que nos sostiene y le da sustento a nuestra vida. El tronco y las ramas son visibles, asi como los frutos que contienen la semillas a travรฉs de las cuales el รกrbol se propaga. El tronco es el intelecto y las emociones y los frutos el producto de nuesra existencia que se propaga despuรฉs de nuestra desapariciรณn fรญsica. Las ramas son ideas y raรญces en acciรณn. El que tiene mas sabidurรญa que acciรณn es como un รกrbol frondoso que tiene pocas raรญces, cualquier viento lo voltea. El que tiene acciones mas que sabidurรญa es capaz de resistir todos los vientos- Rabino Shemtov Shoftim
El tiempo suspendido, en que la incertidumbre y la ansiedad nos envuelven, los valores del espรญritu son los que pueden darme respuesta. Mi cuerpo pierde material en la comunicaciรณn virtual y me alejo del corazรณn de las cosas simples . Se me estรกn cerrando los sentidos . Me siento como un golem ciego a las huellas, como las piedritas que dejaban Hansel y Gretel con la esperanza de ser rescatados en el bosque.
Aunque parezca que miro de lejos el sentimiento de orfandad que sintieron Hansel y Gretel me recuerda el tiempo de las noches de verano, cuando la luna iluminaba los fragmentos de mi memoria confundidos al sonido del follaje que respiraban las hojas, los olores frescos , la manzana que caรญa para unirse al suelo, entonces escuchaba la voz de mi madre …no lejos cae lamanzana del รกrbol. Ahora en la necesidad de volver a conectarme con lo que he dejado allรญ fabrico paisajes de mar de tinta para poder estar. En esa necesidad de encontrar las huellas mi relaciรณn con el รกrbol se vueve emocional Contemplarlo, buscar cobija,inundarme de su esencia para descubrir seres y cosas y volver a las huellas.
Prof. Perla Bajder/ Lic. en Artes Visuales/ Universidad Nacional de las Artes/ Buenos Aires/Argentina
The Torah says: Man is a tree of the field. Like the tree rooted in the ground, it is our emotions that express our depth. Ensuring like trees our roots in spiritual sustenance depends on our deep connection with our essence. Like the tree, we have roots, trunk and fruits. The roots. They are not visible and are deeply buried, they are what give life to the tree.
We have an invisible part: faith, It is what sustains us and gives sustenance to our life. The trunk and branches are visible, as well as the fruits that contain the seeds through which the tree propagates. The trunk is the intellect and the emotions and the fruits the product of our existence that spreads after our physical disappearance. Branches are ideas and roots in action. He who has more wisdom than action is like a leafy tree that has few roots, any wind will turn it over. He who has actions more than wisdom is able to resist all winds- Rabbi Shemtov Shoftim
The suspended time, in which uncertainty and anxiety surround us, the values โโof the spirit are the ones who can give me answer. My body loses material in virtual communication and I get away from the heart of the simple things. My senses are closing. I feel like a golem blind to footprints, like the pebbles left by Hansel and Gretel hoping to be rescued in the forest.Although it seems that I look from afar the feeling of orphan that Hansel and Gretel felt reminds me of the time of summer nights, when the moon illuminated the fragments of my memory confused by the sound of the foliage that the leaves breathed, the fresh smells, the apple fell to join the ground, then listened the voice of mother … not far falls theapple from the tree. Now in need; to reconnect with what I have left there, I make landscapes of sea of โโink to be able to be. In that need to find the traces, my relationship with the tree becomes emotional Contemplating it, seek shelter, flood myself with its essence to discover beings and things and go back to the tracks.
Prof. Perla Bajder / Graduate in Visual Arts / National University of the Arts / Buenos Aires / Argentina
DIBUJOS DE TINTA SOBRE PAPEL/ PEN AND INK DRAWINGS
Y maรฑana serรกn รกrboles/And Tomorrow They Will Be Trees
La imagen de mis padres casรกndose y navegando en un pequeรฑo bote hacia la Argentina/The picture of my parents getting married and travelling in a small boat toward Argentina
____________________________________
La rebeliรณn de los รกrboles/The Rebellion of the Trees
Luisa Futoransky naciรณ en Buenos Aires. En 1967 se recibe de abogada en la misma Universidad. Obtiene una beca de laย Universidad de Iowaย mediante la que realiza la residencia delย Programa Internacional de Escritura,ย EE. UU.En Roma, Italia, estudia poesรญa contemporรกnea en la Universidad de Roma y en la Academia Chighiana, Siena. Tras residir en China, donde trabaja para Radio Pekรญn, y Japรณn, donde es periodista del servicio en espaรฑol de la NHK y profesora de mรบsica en la Universidad de mรบsica de Mushasino (Tokio), en 1981 se radicรณ en Francia, trabajando en elย Centro Georges Pompidou,ย y como redactora de la agencia de noticias France Presse.Ha colaborado en diversos medios literarios periodรญsticos:ย Ars,ย L’Ane,ย Pรกgina/30,ย Pรกgina/12,ย Clarรญn,ย El Correo de la Unesco,ย World Fiction,ย Hispamรฉrica,ย Basel Zeitung. Asimismo, ha hecho trabajos para Radio France, el Ministerio de Cultura Francรฉs y Radio Euskadi de Espaรฑa.Futoransky, que habla espaรฑol, francรฉs, inglรฉs, hebreo e italiano, reรบne en su obra un conjunto increรญblemente rico de referencias culturales inspiradas en sus experiencias de vida en Amรฉrica Latina, Europa y el Lejano Oriente, que mezcla con imรกgenes distintivas de su hogar (Argentina). En 1997 fue miembro del International Writing Program de Iowa City, Iowa. Es invitada regularmente a dar conferencias en prestigiosas universidades de Francia, Espaรฑa, Argentina y Estados Unidos. Asimismo, con regularidad es autora invitada a festivales literarios internacionales. La obra de Futoransky se cita a menudo en los estudios sobre la escritura femenina contemporรกnea, asรญ como en los que tratan temas como el exilio, la identidad transnacional, la lengua, la poesรญa latinoamericana contemporรกnea o los escritores argentinos en Parรญs.
Luisa Futoransky was born in Buenos Aires. In 1967 she received her law degree from the same University. He obtains a scholarship from the University of Iowa through which he does the International Writing Program residency, USA in Rome, Italy, studies contemporary poetry at the University of Rome and at the Chighiana Academy, Siena. After residing in China, where she works for Radio Peking, and Japan, where she is a journalist for the NHK Spanish service and a music professor at the Mushasino University of Music (Tokyo), in 1981 she settled in France, working at the Center Georges Pompidou, and as editor of the France Presse news agency, has collaborated in various literary and journalistic media: Ars, L’Ane, Pรกgina / 30, Pรกgina / 12, Clarรญn, El Correo de la Unesco, World Fiction, Hispamรฉrica, Basel Zeitung. He has also done work for Radio France, the French Ministry of Culture and Radio Euskadi de Espaรฑa.Futoransky, who speaks Spanish, French, English, Hebrew and Italian, brings together in his work an incredibly rich set of cultural references inspired by his experiences of life in Latin America, Europe and the Far East, which he mixes with distinctive images of her home (Argentina). In 1997 she was a member of the International Writing Program of Iowa City, Iowa. She is regularly invited to give lectures at prestigious universities in France, Spain, Argentina and the United States. She is also a regular guest author at international literary festivals. Futoransky’s work is often cited in studies of contemporary female writing, as well as in those dealing with topics such as exile, transnational identity, language, contemporary Latin American poetry, or Argentine writers in Paris.
En el comienzo hay ruido a viento, estรก soleado y yo estoy adentro. No empleo el tiempo caminando por el sendero de tierra para el barrio de Jaitiรฉn, no por el de la derecha hacia la Cooperativa Popular. Se me cruzan varios lugares en los que puedo pensar para no estar donde estoy ahora, sugeridos por una foto y una tarjeta postal que coloquรฉ bajo el vidrio del escritorio, son: un ramo de cerezas en flor de uno de los รกrboles de la casa donde vivรญ cuatro aรฑos en Sakuradai, Tokio, y la Puerta de los Leones de Jerusalem.
Me sonรฉ los dedos, los de la mano izquierda, cada crujido equivale a una mentira: tengo mรกs mentiras en la mano derecha que en la izquierda. Estoy de acuerdo: la izquierda es del corazรณn.
Oigo que por el pasillo que da a mi cuarto los tonjis, camaradas en chino, se estรกn gritoneando, a lo mejor son simplemente como me suenan a mรญ los cuatro tonos de su idioma y en vez de putearse estรกn hablando de sus temas preferidos: el tiempo o el precio, calidad y escasez de las verduras. Las ramas de los รกrboles ya estรกn peladas.
Cancelo la nostalgia de un plumazo y no voy a hablar de cuando volvรญ a ver la Cruz del Sur, pero en Bali. Entonces, ยฟquรฉ? Estoy mareada porque no sรฉ lo que vale la pena decir y lo que tengo que seguir diciendo. Excusas, tentaciones que no me voy a conceder: irme un <<ratito>> a la cama para hacerme la paja, visitar a mi vecina para preguntarle cรณmo siguen los mรบltiples fracturas del marido despuรฉs del accidenteโรบltimo escandalete protagonizados por sudamericanos del Hotel de la Amistad, donde ocurriรณ que luego de hartas tramoyas para conseguirlo por vรญa diplomรกtico, el รบnico latino con auto propio de los que trabajamos contratados por China en Pekรญn, sale a estrenarlo con el amigo y el mismo dรญa se hacen polvo en curda a las tres de la maรฑana tratando de levantar minas en el parque Beihaiโo hablar con Ana para matar el tiempo, suponiendo que el tiempo se deje. Entonces accedo a tras trampas de las urgencias: mear y lavar los paรฑuelosโestoy tan resfriada–, por encima de la nรกusea que no quedan restos de moco y hacerlos secar en las azulejos del baรฑo para que se planchen solos. Tambiรฉn ahรญ, estรก claro, me doy una lectura, una guรญa, una seรฑal.
No puedo comenzar esto diciendo: <<Nacรญ 1632 en la ciudad de York>> como Robinson, porque nacรญ en Buenos Aires el 5 de enero de 1939. Mis padres decรญan que en el nacimiento del cuello tengo dos venitas que formaban claramente una V, la V de Victoria, decรญan.
Casi ningรบn recuerdo de la guerra, aunque esforzรกndome puedo distinguir con vaguedad en la pieza que nos servรญa de comedor y dormitorio, de techo muy alto con ladrillos entre las vigas, pintados de cal blanca, una conversaciรณn entre papรก y los tรญosโapuesto que quieran ganar a los aliados–. Y otra mรกs susurrada: –dicen que en Entre Rรญos estรกn preparando campos de concentraciรณn–. Y una tercera en la que mamรก trata de aplacarlo y รฉl da un puรฑetazo sordo en la mesa y se pone colorado de rabia, como cuando se enoja conmigo: — cuando ustedes decรญan que Londres no iba a aguantar el รบnico que tenรญa razรณn como siempre era yo–, notar el como siempre. Pero, mucho mรกs que eso, recuerdo celebrando parecido con Shirley Temple; por รฉl una mujer una vez hasta me quiso regalar plata en el subte: –la nena es una belleza, Dios la guarde; toma linda, para que te compres algo que te guste–. Y papรก, por supuesto impidiรฉndome recibirla con la mirada: –faltaba mรกs, seรฑora, pero decรญ gracias lo mismo–. Y ella: –pero seรฑorโฆ.
Y el episodio me dejaba una sensaciรณn de culpa, de vergรผenza, de miedo, porque estaba enojado y yo no sabรญa quรฉ habรญa hecho de malo; otra mujer con papรก y yo en la plaza de Santos Lugares, papรก nunca me deja esta vez me manda — ยกquรฉ raro!โa jugar sola; por fin despuรฉs me llaman y la mujer se rรญe siempre me regalaba monedas uruguayas grandotas de cinco centรฉsimos, muy pesadas. โPichita, decรญ muchas gracias–, y digo pero de mentira si igual no son para mรญ, si el que junta monedas es papรก. Desde ese dรญa perdรญ el gusto por mi juego preferido, subirme a la cama grande y que papรก y yo desparramรกramos juntos su colecciรณn de monedas porque estaban <<esas>> de las que no podรญa hablar ni la seรฑora tampoco. Recuerdo a mi abuela que me ordenaba contestar a todos que me dijeran que yo era linda, sana y gordita: –ยฟyo como tu pan?โy hacer simultรกneamente sin que me vieran el signo de la figa asรญ me alcanzarรญa el mal del ojo. Recuerdo el gallinero, los nรญsperos y el membrillo cerca de un lugar que no me dejan y llamaban pozo ciego, recuerdo a mi abuelo siempre con tos y cosiendo corbatas, la mano mรกs linda de todas de llevar mi mano por la calle, la boca mรกs verdad de todas de contarme cuentos de gitanos, recuerdo el polvillo que levantaba en la entretela cuando cosรญa y tosรญa porque yo siempre querรญa estar parada al lado de la mรกquina con รฉl, a mi abuelo un dรญa muerto y papรก que me lleva para que lo vea en la pieza de al lado y aunque estaba muy raro y amarillo y medio blanco y medio verde tuve que darle un beso, pero yo no querรญa. Recuerdo la bomba de agua tan frรญa a la maรฑana tan lejos en el fondo de la casa, mejor morir como el abuelo y los canarios del abuelo y el perro del abuelo que tener que lavarse para ir al colegio; –de la Capital porque aunque sea un sacrificio para mi marido llevar y traer a la nena todos los dรญas a la escuela, la enseรฑanza es mucho mejor que de la provincia–.
El colegio Delfรญn Gallo, Escuela nรบmero 1, Consejo escolar 17, de Villa Devoto. Por mรกs que ahora me esfuerce, nunca sabrรฉ ya quiรฉn era ellfรญngallo, ni cuรกl serรก el fin del gallo y como esa, muchรญsimas cosas mรกs.
En el exilio no se velan las armas sino el cartero.
siempre, siempre, desde hace veinte aรฑos, la esperanza en el cartero o en el telรฉfono con el mensaje milagroso que cambiara el curso de la vida, o mรกs modestamente una pequeรฑa glorificaciรณn, al menos uno de los premios menores de la loterรญa
debido a mi precariedad todos mis cuartos han tenido y tienen todavรญa cosas en la pared clavadas con chinches, nada de marcos ni clavitos, nada de permanente ni de permanecer, al menos por ahora, la inseguridad de no tener derecho (real) de estar en el lugar donde estรกs, de paso marginal o casi fuera de la ley, un eterno rechazo (eso no se hace, nena, ยกquรฉ vergรผenza!) a firmar contratos y angustia a renovar el pasaporte, cambio, refocilarme en la lista de miedos de dรญa, que los de noche todavรญa no se tocan, siempre existen varias manera para salir del callejรณn sin salida, volver sobre los pasos por ejemplo, aunque generalmente el camino de vuelta es mรกs largo y pesado, o saltar la tapiaโ
posibilidad aรบn no contemplada. pausa. debajo del vidrio de mi escritorioโpesado resabio, como todos los todos los muebles del hotel, de la primavera del romance chino-soviรฉtico–, tambiรฉn tengo una foto del Buda de Kamakura; le miro larga, intensamente, cรณmo forma con las manos el mudra perfecto para integrarse con el cosmos, por si alguna vez aprendo. estoy sacando del cajรณn lo que tengo (ยฟtodo?, existe acaso todo?), en este momento es lo mejor, lo รบnico, una cosa que querrรญa tener delante, mecerla contra el pecho, a tres metros del ojo, incrustada en mi pared: la chupa enlozada, con esfuerzo podrรญa decir con mayรบsculas azules y dibujo y texto en parte borrados para siempre que se encontraba en el muro de entrada del patio de mi escuela primaria: las mayรบsculas grandes rezaban absolutos: SEA COMPASIVO CON LOS ANIMALES (Domingo Faustino Sarmiento).
la palabra compasiรณn que volviรณ a aparecรฉrseme hace un par de aรฑos, allรก por los trainings de Life dynamics en Tokio, en los libros de budismo que leo ahora y que me sorprendiรณโpero, ยฟde quรฉ estรก hablando? โ cuando al final de algunas de aquellas catรกrticas maratones emocionales, Paula, una muchacha integrante del grupo, le pidiรณ a Satoko, la calรญgrafa japonesa, que le llevara la mano para escribirse esa palabra en los enigmรกticos y sombrรญos caracteres chinos y poder tenerla asรญ continuamente delante a mรญ se me confunde con la que a mi turno, yo le pedรญ: alegrรญa y creaciรณn, o sea con-pasiรณn, una sola patita de una consonante y es una puerta que no cruzo, al menos todavรญa, detengรกmonos en el dintel.
Reciรฉn estoy empezando a aceptar que en Baires no se acuerden de mรญ. Un segmento de recta largo que tracรฉ relativamente a sabiendas y del cual soy responsable. Me liga un ajado pasaporte azul marino, el idioma que estoy viviendo como puedo, el paquete de fantasmas que me visitan cada vez por suerte de menos frecuencia, los cuatro o cinco amigos que cada tanto reencontramos por el mundo y parรก de contar. Se acabaron los firuletes y el vendedor de barquillos con el eje de su ruleta pura trampa en el recuerdo. Nadie conserva los negativos del bebรฉ desnudo en Santos Lugares ni las piedrecitas que se metรญa en mis primeros zapatos cuando caminaba orgullosa de la ma-no-de-pa-pรก por el pedregullo de la plazoleta de la estaciรณn de ferrocarril. Allรญ quedaron tambiรฉn los huesos de las bobes y zeides que a veces pretendo que me visitan para protegerme cuando medito a modo nuestro en el zaipe nรบmero 4414 del pekinรฉs Yoi-Bing-Wang, Hotel de la Amistad.
In the beginning there is noise of the wind, it is sunny and I am inside. I donโt use the time walking on the dirt path toward the Jaitien neighborhood, not to the right toward the Popular Cooperative. Several places pass me by of which I can think in order not to be where I am now, suggested by a photograph and a post card that I placed under the glass of the next, they are: a branch or cherries in flower of one to the house trees where I lived tor four years in Sakuradai, Tokyo and the Lionโs Gate in Jerusalem.
I cracked my fingers, the lefthanded ones, each crack equals a lie: I have more lies in the right hand than in the left. I agree: the left side is the heart.
Though the hallway that faces my room I hear the tonjis, comrades in Chinese, they are yelling, or perhaps it is simply how the four tones of their language sound to be, and instead of screwing around, they are speaking about their favorite topics: the weather or the price, quality and shortages of vegetables. The tree branches are already bare.
I cancel nostalgia with a stroke of my pen and Iโm not going to speak about when I saw the Southern Cross again, though in Bali. Then, what? I am dazed because I donโt know what is worth saying and what I have to say continue saying. Excuses, temptations to which I am not going to concede: go to bed for โa little whileโ to masturbate, visit my neighbor to ask her how her husbandโs multiple fractures are coming along after the accidentโa small scandal starring South Americans from the Hotel of Friendship, where it happened that after full-fledged schemes to obtain it by diplomatic means, the only Latino with his own car from among those who worked under contract to China in Peking, goes out with a friend to show it off, and the same day they got wasted and totaled it at three oโclock in the morning, while chasing girls in Bahei Park. Or to speak with Ana to kill time, supposing that there was time left to kill. Then, I accede to those urgent requirements: to pee and to wash handkerchiefsโI have such a bad coldโabove and beyond the nausea, that there are no bits of snot left and to let them dry on the bathroom tiles so that they iron themselves. Also, there, I give myself a lecture, a guide, a signal.
I canโt begin by saying: โI was born in the city of Yorkโ like Robinson, because I was born in Buenos Aires in the fifth o January of 1939. My parents use to say that since birth I have two little veins that clearly form a V, a V for Victoria, they said.
Almost no memory of the war, though forcing myself I can distinguish vaguely in the room that served us as bedroom and living room, with a very high roof with bricks between the rafters, painted with white lime, a conversation among papa and my unclesโI guess the wanted Allies to win–. And another more whispered: โThey say that they are preparing concentration camps in Entre Rรญos.โ And a third in which my mother tried to calm him down, and he slammed the table with dull blow of his fist on the table and turned red with rage, like when he was mad at me: โWhen you folks said that London will not endure, I was the only one who was right, as I always was, with the emphasis as always. But much more that, I remember my celebrated resemblance to Shirley Temple. For that, once a woman wanted to give me money on the subway: โThe little girl is a beauty, let God watch over her, take pretty one, so that you can buy something that you like.โ And papa, of course keeping me with his glance from receiving it; โItโs not necessary, Madam, but tell the thank you anyway.โ And she: โBut, sirโฆ And the episode left with a sensation of guilt, of shame, of fear, because he was angry, and I didnโt know what I had done wrong; another woman with papa in the Santos Lugares Plaza, papa who never left me, ordered me–how strange!โto play alone; finally, later they called me, and the woman laughed and gave me huge Uruguayan coins of five centesimos, very heavy ones. โPInchita, say thank you very muchโ, and I said it, but I was lying, for as it was, they werenโt for me, since the one who collects coins from all over the world is papa. From that day, I lost my appetite for my favorite game, to climb onto the big bed, and papa and I spilled together his collection because there were โthoseโ which he couldnโt speak not even to mother. I remember my grandmother who ordered me to answer all those who told me I was pretty, healthy and chubby: โDo I eat your bread?โ and simultaneously without their seeing it give them the finger, so as to avoid the evil eye. I remember the chicken coop, the medlars and the quince tree near a place where they didnโt let me go near and they called the blind well, I remember my grandfather who always had a cough and always sewing neckties, the nicest hand of all to take my hand on the street, the most true of all for telling me gypsy stories, I remember the dust that rose on the inner lining when he sewed and coughed because I always wanted to stand beside the machine with him, of my grandfather, dead one day, and papa who brought me so I could see him in the side room, and although he was very strange and yellow and half white and half green, I had to give him a kiss, but I didnโt want to. I remember the pump of cold water in the morning so far from the back of the house, better to die like my grandfather and my grandfatherโs canaries than to have to wash yourself before going to school: โin the Capital because even if it was a sacrifice for my husband to take the girl to school and bring her home every day, the teaching is far better than in the province.โ
The Delfรญn Gallo School, School number 1, School Council 17 of Villa Devoto. For as hard as I now try, I will never yet know who was ellfรญngallo, or what will be the โfin (end) of the gallo (rooster)โ and like that, many other things.
In exile, you donโt watch over your weapons and armor, but rather the postman.
always, always, for twenty years, the hope in the postman or in the telephone with a miraculous message that will change the course of life, or more modestly, a small gratification, at least one of the smaller prizes of the lottery.
owing to my precariousness, my rooms have had and still have thing on the wall stuck in with little pins, nothing like frames or little nails, nothing permanent nor staying, at least for now, the insecurity of not having the right (for real) to be in the place where you are, marginally passing through or almost beyond the law, an eternal rejection (you donโt do that, little girl, how shameful!) to sign contracts and the anguish of renewing your passport, change, to take pleasure in the list of fears by day, that those by night donโt yet touch you, there always exist various ways to leave the dead end street, reverse your steps, for example, although generally the return trip is larger and harder, or jump over the wallโ
a possibility not yet contemplated, pause, below the glass of my writing deskโawfully bad taste, like all the furniture of the hotel, from the spring of the Chino-Soviet romance–, also I have a photo of the Buddha of Kamakural; I look at him for a long time, intensely, how he forms the perfect mudra with his hands to integrate himself with the cosmos, as if I will learn sometime. I am taking what I have out of my big box (all? does all perhaps exist?), in this moment, it is the best; the only one, a thing that I would like to have in front of me, to rock it against my chest, at three meters from my eye, incrusted into my wall: the enameled piece of leather, with difficulty it could say with it had blue capital letters and drawing and text, in part erased, for all times that was found in the entrance wall of the patio of my elementary school: the capital letters prayed in absolute terms: BE COMPASSIONATE WITH ANIMALS (Domingo Faustino Sarmiento.)
the word compassion that appeared to me again a couple of years ago, there in the trainingsofLife dynamics in Tokyo, in the books of Buddhism that I read now and that surprised meโbut, what are they talking aboutโwhen at the end of some cathartic emotional marathons, Paula, a girl member of the group, aske Satoko, the Japanese calligrapher, that he raise his hand to write that work in the enigmatic and somber Chinese characters and have it always in front of her, and I am confused when at my turn, I ask him for: joy and creation, o rather con-passion, a single little foot of a consonant and it is a door that I donโt cross, at least for now. letโs stop at the threshold.
Recently, I am beginning to accept that in Baires they donโt remember me. A segment of a long straight line that I trace relatively fully aware and of which I am responsible. I am tied by a worn sea blue passport, the language that I am living as I can, a package of phantasms that visit me luckily over time less frequency, the four of five friends that every once in a while we meet again in the world and–stop to retell. The knick-knacks have stopped and the seller of ice cream cones with the shaft of his roulette wheel only a trap in the memory, nobody keeps the negatives of the naked baby in Santos Lugares nor the little stones that were put in my first shoes when I proudly walked with pa-paโs ha-nd through the little square of the railway station. There also remain the bones of the las bobes and zeides who at times I pretend visit me to protect me when I meditate in our way in the zaipe number 4424 of the Bejing Yoi-Bing-Wang, Hotel of Friendship.
Patricia Indij naciรณ en Buenos Aires, Argentina en 1961. Arquitecta, Universidad de Buenos Aires. Su formaciรณn artรญstica fue adquirida en talleres de pintura de los maestros Heriberto Zorrilla, Helena Distรฉfano y clรญnica de obra con Marino Santamarรญa.
Estudiรณ teorรญa del arte, materias de posgrado de Especializaciรณn en curadurรญa en arte. Trabaja en sus producciones de curadurรญa, realiza curadurรญas de arte en instituciones y dicta clases de pintura en su taller en Buenos Aires.
Muestras individuales en Argentina: Colegio Pestalozzi 2019; Universidad UNLam, 2018, Teatro Nacional Cervantes 2016, Multiespacio de arte, Gral Pico, La Pampa 2015, Bolsa de Comercio de Bs As, 2015; Museo del Holocausto 2014, Consejo profesional de Ciencias Econรณmicas 2014, Centro Cultural Borges 2012, Honorable Senado de la Naciรณn 2009, Museo de la mujer 2009, Museo Manzana de las Luces โLa noche de los Museosโ2009, Museo Municipal de Bellas Artes de Lujรกn 2008, Galerรญa Bonenkamp Revale 2008, Espacio arte Aeropuertos internacional Jorge Newbery, Buenos Aires, Mendoza, Jujuy y Resistencia
Muestras colectivas: Museo Marรญtimo de Ushuaia 2012, Museo Metropolitano 2010, Bolsa de comercio de Buenos aires 2015, Crucero MS Bs. As, Punta del Este, Rรญo de Janeiro 2009/2010.Galerรญas de Arte en Buenos Aires, y Uruguay, ferias de arte Eggo 2015, Expotrastiendas 2006/2007/2010.
En el exterior, Muestras individuales: La Maison de l`Amerique Latine 2013, Embajada Argentina en Berlรญn 2012, Casa Argentina en Parรญs Ciudad Internacional Universitaria.
Patricia Indij was born in Buenos Aires, Argentina in 1961. Architect, Universidad de Buenos Aires. Her artistic training was acquired in the painting workshops of the masters Heriberto Zorrilla, Helena Distรฉfano and work clinic with Marino Santamarรญa.
She studied art theory, postgraduate courses of Specialization in curatorship in art. She works on her curaturial productions, conducts art curatorships in institutions and teaches painting classes in her workshop in Buenos Aires.
Individual Exhibitions in Argentina : Colegio Pestalozzi 2019; UNLam University, 2018, National Cervantes Theater 2016, Multiespacio de arte, Gral Pico, La Pampa 2015, Buenos Aires Stock Exchange, 2015; Holocaust Museum 2014, Professional Council of Economic Sciences 2014, Borges Cultural Center 2012, Honorable Senate of the Nation 2009, Museum of Women 2009, Manzana de las Luces Museum “The Night of Museums” 2009, Municipal Museum of Fine Arts of Lujรกn 2008, Bonenkamp Revale Gallery 2008, Jorge Newbery International Airports Art Space, Buenos Aires, Mendoza, Jujuy and Resistencia
Collective exhibitions : Maritime Museum of Ushuaia 2012, Metropolitan Museum 2010, Buenos Aires Stock Exchange 2015, Cruise ship MS Bs. As, Punta del Este, Rio de Janeiro 2009/2010. Galleries of Art in Buenos Aires, and Uruguay, Eggo art fairs 2015, Expotrastiendas 2006/2007/2010.
Abroad, individual exhibitions : La Maison de l`Amerique Latine 2013, Argentine Embassy in Berlin 2012, Argentine House in Paris International University City.
Una experiencia desbordante/An Exuberant Experience
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Obras de tinta sobre papel/Works of Ink on paper
Tinta 01/Tinta 01
Tinta 09/Ink 09
Tinta 05/Ink 05
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โINOCENCIA EN FUGAโฆBERLIN Y SUS FANTASMAS” (selecciones de una exhibiciรณn sobre Berlรญn y el Holocausto)
โuna sucesiรณn de imรกgenes que en cรกmara lenta hablan de destrucciรณn, de guerra, de una ciudad inmersa en el humo y los escombros, en donde se vislumbran siluetas solitarias, oscuras, quemadas, perdidas, caminando bajo el ensordecedor ruido de aviones rasantes o el crujir de estructuras de rascacielos a punto de caerโ.
Irene Jaievsky. ex-curadora Museo del Holocausto.
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“INNOCENCE ON THE RUN โฆ BERLIN AND ITS GHOSTS” (selections from an exhibition on Berlin and the Holocaust)
โA succession of images that in slow motion speak of destruction, of war, of a city immersed in smoke and debris, where lonely, dark, burned, lost silhouettes are glimpsed, walking under the deafening noise of low planes or the creak of skyscraper structures about to fall โ.
Irene Jaievsky, Former Curator of the Holocaust Museum, Buenos Aires
Prรณfugos de la esperanza/ Fugitives of Hope
El aliento de los inocentes/The Breath of the Innocents
Alicia Kozameh naciรณ en 1953 en Rosario, Argentina. En 1973, esta joven cuya vida quedรณ marcada por la temprana muerte de su hermana mayor, comenzรณ a estudiar Filosofรญa y Letras en la Universidad Nacional de Rosario.El 24 de septiembre de 1975, fue detenida por su militancia polรญtica en un partido de izquierda, el Partido Revolucionario de los Trabajadores (PRT). Por ese entonces, pasรณ sus dรญas presa en uno de los lugares de detenciรณn mรกs peligroso del paรญs conocido como โEl sรณtanoโ, de la Alcaldรญa de Mujeres de la Jefatura de Policรญa de Rosario. Tiempo despuรฉs, ya en la penitenciarรญa de Villa Devoto (en la ciudad de Buenos Aires), una amnistรญa de Navidad la dejรณ libre pero vigilada. Por supuesto, no fue fรกcil para esta mujer rehacer su vida. A la dificultad para encontrar trabajo se le habรญa sumado las amenazas que continuaba recibiendo pese a que los seis meses de libertad vigilada ya habรญan quedado atrรกs. Las autoridades policiales como las militares le exigรญan que se fuera del paรญs. Ante esa situaciรณn, apenas tuvo en su poder la documentaciรณn requerida, Alicia Kozameh decidiรณ exiliarse y asรญ fue como llegรณ a California y, tiempo despuรฉs, a Mรฉxico. En ese periodo de destierro, la escritora se ganรณ la vida en una agencia de prensa, fue redactora en jefe de la publicaciรณn literaria โLa brรบjula en el bolsilloโ, se desempeรฑรณ como jefe de oficina y fue directora de la biblioteca de la agencia โLos Niรฑos de las Amรฉricasโ. El regreso de la autora a su tierra natal tuvo lugar en 1984. A partir de allรญ, trabajรณ para una agencia de marketing en Buenos Aires, fue empleada de la Escuela Freudiana y publicรณ varios cuentos y artรญculos en diversos medios argentinos. En 1987, con la apariciรณn de su novela โPasos bajo el aguaโ, las amenazas y presiones policiales que ya parecรญan haber quedado en el olvido vuelven a cobrar fuerza y, por esa razรณn, Kozameh regresa al aรฑo siguiente a California. Siempre ligada a las actividades literarias, , fundรณ un centro cultural latinoamericano en Los รngeles, enseรฑรณ literatura y creรณ la revista literaria โMonรณculoโ.โEl sรฉptimo sueรฑoโ, โ259 saltos, uno inmortalโ, โPatas de avestruzโ y โOfrenda de propia pielโ son otros de los libros publicados por esta argentina que ha sido reconocida con el Premio Crisis (Argentina) y compartiรณ con otras autoras el Premio Memoria Histรณrica de las Mujeres en Amรฉrica Latina y el Caribe2000.
Alicia Kozameh was born in 1953 in Rosario, Argentina. In 1973, this young woman whose life was marked by the early death of her older sister, began to study Philosophy and Letters at the National University of Rosario. On September 24, 1975, she was arrested for her political activism in a left-wing party, the Revolutionary Workers Party (PRT). At that time, she spent her days imprisoned in one of the most dangerous places of detention in the country known as โEl sรณtanoโ, of the Mayor’s Office for Women of the Rosario Police Headquarters. Some time later, already in the Villa Devoto penitentiary (in the city of Buenos Aires), a Christmas amnesty left her free but under surveillance. Of course, it was not easy for this woman to rebuild her life. The difficulty in finding work had been compounded by the threats that he continued to receive despite the fact that the six months of probation had already been left behind. Police authorities such as the military demanded that he leave the country. Faced with this situation, as soon as she had the required documentation in her possession, Alicia Kozameh decided to go into exile and that is how she arrived in California and, later, in Mexico. During that period of exile, the writer earned her living at a press agency, she was editor-in-chief of the literary publication “Los Niรฑos de las Amรฉricas”. The author’s return to her homeland took place in 1984. From there, she worked for a marketing agency in Buenos Aires, was an employee of the Freudian School and published several stories and articles in various Argentine media. In 1987, with the appearance of his novel “Steps under the water”, the threats and police pressure that seemed to have been forgotten once again gained strength and, for that reason, Kozameh returned to California the following year. Always linked to literary activities, she founded a Latin American cultural center in Los Angeles, taught literature and created the literary magazine “Monรณculo”. โEl sรฉptimo sueรฑoโ, โ259 saltos, uno inmortalโ, โPatas de avestruzโ y โOfrenda de propia pielโ are other books published by this Argentine that has been recognized with the Crisis Award (Argentina) and shared with others authors of the Prize for the Historical Memory of Women in Latin America and the Caribbean 2000.
ยกQuรฉ efecto te causarรก ese tipo de sismos, o como quieras llamarles, tardรญos! (ยกNunca es tan tarde, querida!); porque son como alfileres ubicados en puntos estratรฉgicos del cerebro. Quiero decir, las catarsis nunca vienen solas: el Paranรก baja desde el Matto Grosso y arrastra muy variados especรญmenes. Los camalotes, Juliana, y las piraรฑas. De los camalotes estoy muy segura. Y me pregunto por quรฉ las piraรฑas no llegan hasta Rosario.
Estamos avanzando, raudas, por los primeros dรญas del aรฑo 1984. Y tambiรฉn veloces. Otros son capaces de desligarse de la acumulaciรณn y de los aรฑos. A mรญ se me dio por incursionar en hechos siempre dispuestos a permanecer. No es casual. No creas en las casualidades. Estoy tratando de ubicarme en el punto de fuga de todas las visiones posibles, para arrancar con un cuento en el que el eje sea traslado al sรณtano de Rosario a Villa Devoto. A mรญ me de vuelta como un guante en el trance de vencerme a mรญ misma.
Entonces, vos entendรฉs. Una vez te pedรญ que contestaras por carta mis preguntas sobre tu tortura. Las dos conocรญamos hasta las inflexiones que le ponรฉs la voz en esos casos. Pero yo me impulsรฉ, por mi pedido y por tus respuestas, y seguรญ adelante con la novela que estaba escribiendo. Ahora, el mismo recurso.
Anoche no pude dormir: eso de que el chico nazca con alguna falla. Y esta maรฑana, al irme al trabajo, cuando ya habรญamos salido de casa, me di cuenta de que todavรญa estaba adentro, buscando la puerta de la calle.
Santa Bรกrbara es salvaje y lo disfruta. Abre las piernas y se sacude de sol y abundancia. Aquรญ la gente no se muere nunca. En cambio el Paranรก, vos viste: nos crispa los nervios. Las vรญboras, todo lo que nos deposita al final de su travesรญa. ยฟTe suena lo que viene? El Paranรก nace en Brasil de la confluencia de los rรญos Paranaรญba y Grande. Esta memoria que me gasto tiene que ser un producto de una endovenosa aplicada por la vieja de Geografรญa. De otro modo no se explica
Del sรณtano a Villa Devoto. Imposible recordar la totalidad. Sรญ ciertas angustias: Blanca siempre tuvo una sombra de bigotes mรกs pronunciado de lo recomendable. Ese dรญa se le habรญa ennegrecido, le cortaba la cara en dos. Iba esposada a Tania. Tania tan alta y ella tan petisa, con sus bigotes y su muda en un bolso azul, hecho de un pantalรณn vaquero por un par de esas manos casi mรกgicas que ya empezamos a tener. Contรกme algo de Parรญs, ยฟno?, ยฟo no vivรญs allรญ?, ยฟo estรกs encerrada en el baรฑo del departamento?, ยฟo en la cocina? Ojalรก se trate del dormitorio.
Tu calle debe ser como una de Posadas. Empedrada, entre piedra y piedra alguna planta asomรกndose, sobre alguna hoja una hormiga en plena cabalgata pro-vรญveres. Asรญ se me ocurre una calle de Posadas; ademรกs de estar salpicada con golpes que el Paranรก da cuando se enloquece. A las otras cuadras de Parรญs deben salpicarlas llantos de pรกjaros, cervezas rotas, lluvias incestuosas y enredadas. Y tambiรฉn un poco del Paranรก, estoy segura. Colaborรก conmigo y confirmรกselo. Gracias.
ยฟVos a quiรฉn ibas esposada? No recuerdo haber visto a nadie cerca tuya en ese momento. Pero lo que me olvido es que, llegadas a Devoto, Mercedes entrรณ al pabellรณn que nos asignaron y vomitรณ hasta el corazรณn. Con eso mandรณ por las tuberรญas de las letrinas todo lo que se pareciera a un traslado de presas polรญticas y sus posibles implicancias. Admirable.
ยกPabellรณn 31! En serio. Admirable.
Dรณnde andarรก Flora; la que lavaba la ropa cuando le tocaba, a cualquiera menos a ella y ocupaba la รบnica soga del baรฑo como si nada. Quรฉ serรก de esa cara apretada que tenรญa. Estarรก eligiendo apropiados jabones de polvo en barra en el Senegal y alrededores. Es posible que con tantos aรฑos de exilio ya habรญa adquirido un lavarropas automรกtico. Depende: no sรฉ quรฉ grado de especializaciรณn haya logrado.
Tu madre me escribiรณ para mi cumpleaรฑos. Se la siente como una flor a las nueve de la maรฑana de verano porteรฑo. No quiero ponerme redundante, pero te envidio. ยกUna madre como Adelina!
Uno vive disculpรกndose. Temor de ser reiterativo. Y preguntarles a los milicos si les importรณ repetir mรฉtodos, plagiarlos, gastarlos. Es decir, no te molestes. No les preguntes nada.
Me siento como si estuviera muy concentrada en meter un dedo en algรบn agujero.
Aquella bandera, la que les dejamos colgada en el baรฑo del sรณtano antes de que nos llevaran. No sรฉ, nunca terminรฉ de completar en mi cabeza un cuadro con las manos de las celadoras interrumpidas en alguna forma de asombro, suspendidas entre la bandera y sus panzas, sus tetas, sin poder decidirse a arrancarla. Tocarla: abrazar al demonio. No celeste, blanca y celeste, querida: sรณlo celeste y blanca. ยฟTe las imaginรกs? Tan puras, ellas.
Abrazar el demonio. Las yemas de los dedos acercรกndose.
Debe estar caliente, por donde lo toques. Los ojos afiebrados, y esa barba en punta que debe dar muchas, pero muchas ganas de apoyarse, ยฟno? Sin dudas: si se me aparece Mandinga, yo pruebo. ยกGran siestita! Y nada de forget about it. Ahรญ debe haber mucho que aprender.
Meterme entre las sรกbanas. Las frazadas pesรกndome sobre el lado izquierdo. Sรญ. Me doy una ducha y sigo desde la cama.
Estaba pensandoโel agua es un sacramentoโque tomar una resoluciรณn, optar, es como perder un dedo de la mano en un acto voluntario y adquirir tres en la otra, asรญ, de golpe. No te desesperes mucho. Ya sabรฉs: precalentamiento. Acordรกte el futuro cuento. Estoy abriendo el primer agujero. Aunque tambiรฉn podrรญa estar trabajรกndome algo referido a dar un salto. No es nada novedoso, ya lo sรฉ. Mis saltos te provocan ataques hepรกticos, pero son previsibles. Es magnรญfico optar, elegir. ยฟNo es como cantar Yesterday modulando despacio, con tus propios labios, con tus propios labios, cada palabra, ir dรกndoles forma una a una, ocupando cada mรบsculo, los dientes, la lengua, la boca entera, recostada en una hamaca tejida desde que la รบnica visiรณn sea una fuente transparente repleta de cerezas casi violetas y un aviรณn blanco despegando? Antes de que la celadora me asegurara con las esposas creo que a Sonia y nos sentarรก de bruto empujรณn en el suelo, en la plataforma sin asientos dijo como otro golpe, un no pueden mirar. Levantรฉ apenas la cabeza. Ya casi todas las compaรฑeras estaban colocadas en hileras, sentadas a lo Buda en el suelo engrilladas al acero del piso, las cabezas bajas y el brazo libre pesando sobre la nuca. Te juro que le saquรฉ una foto eterna, para la posteridad de este espectรกculo.
Una formaciรณn, una escuadra paralizada en trance de retraer su miembros en un paso รญntimo de baile, en un cรญrculo completo, para despuรฉs abrirse y alagarse para siempre. No me digas que la realidad del aviรณn estaba muy lejos de parecerse a ninguna danza. Ya lo sรฉ. Se trata mรกs bien de un gran mareo histรณrico, de la nรกusea universal, que de todos modos dejรณ sentir la direcciรณn por la que se decidรญa este gran aparato digestivo que habitamos.
Los grillos y las esposas eran galladura de huevo; eran una absoluto, una ficciรณn. Una fiesta de potencias se movilizaba alrededor de cada ojo, de cada labio frenando el impulso de gestar sonidos.
Algunos pares de borceguรญes tambiรฉn provocaban su propio accidente contra hombros, cabezas, entre las caras que intentaban reajustar su perspectiva captando un รกngulo de totalidad y la solidez sonora de los tacos. Yo ya estaba en el aviรณn militar, amordazada de pies y tuรฉtanos. Bonavena despenado, imangรญnate.
El dรญa fue largo. Estuve tratando de tomarme el trabajo con un poco de nuestra filosofรญa: โquรฉ va a hacerโ, pero no caben mis delirios por estas latitudes.
Encima de pronto fui a descubrir, y nada menos que por el zumbido a una mosca pedante como pocas, que se pasรณ quince minutos de su vidaโde la mรญa-arremetiendo de cabeza contra el vidrio de la ventana. Y no me vengas con tu lรณgica; sรญ, era pedante. Y no le di antes la vรญa libre porque me quedรฉ ahรญ siguiรฉndole el proceso de ablandamiento, de consagraciรณn a la causa. La hubieras visto retroceder y tomar impulso, y largarse contra la luz hasta rajar el vidrio de extremo a extremo. La casa se reserva el derecho de admisiรณn. No se me mueve un pelo si me cuestionรกs la verosimilizad. ยฟSuena parecido?
No saliรณ sola, porque se ve que se mareรณ y no pudo completar la operaciรณn. Se apoyรณ en la orilla de la ventana, con cara de vรญctima: asรญ que le abrรญ.
Juliana, decime, ยฟte acordรกs de un vestido blanco de algodรณn, con flores negras que no nos quedaba tan bien a los dos, y que mi vieja me cosiรณ poco despuรฉs de la libertad? Anoche, caminando por State, vi uno muy parecido en la vidriera. Me produjo un solo efecto: ganas de azotar el aire con un par de gritos mรกs o menos siniestros.
Y es tan sucio por รฉpocas en la zona de Rosario, digo el rioโes tan limpio; la prรณxima tarea –, que tienta a sumergirse, a bucearse, porque ya sabemos todo lo que puede hacer enredado el plantario y el barro. ยฟVos quรฉ te imagรญnas? Algunos son tesoros incanjeables: yo puesto por un humilde simple de Jimmy Hendrix, el Antidhuring y un buen diccionario de sinรณnimos. Buen, porque mรกs bueno, mรกs รบtil, mรกs rรกpido. Mรกs rรกpido te lo sacรกs de encima
Tenรญamos que estar listos en veinte minutos con muda de ropa. De dรณnde รญbamos a sacar mesura para demorarnos una eternidad. En la mitad del tiempo ya esperรกbamos, unidas por una corriente elรฉctrica muy fรญsica que nos mantenรญa activos garganta y estรณmago. Pero lo que me angustia: ยฟsabรฉs lo que es?: la posibilidad de que ninguna entendiera en ese momento la esencia del problema. Pero no, tampoco estoy en lo cierto; porque entonces si no captรกbamos la cosa medular, decime que fue lo que nos hizo despedirnos como si fuรฉsemos a morir. Nos clavรกbamos unas miradas blancas, tiza compacto, firme contra las frentes, nos estudiรกbamos la lividez, las arrugas, las canas recientes, nos corregรญamos los defectos de peinado o nos arrancรกbamos unas o otras hilachas, pelosas.
Algunos recuerdos estรกn amputados. Pero no me cuesta nada provocarme un efecto de neuronas. Reponer imรกgenes y las sensaciones vuelven intactas.
Recibรญ carta de Virginia. Todo el asunto se mueve alrededor de una moto que se comprรณ su nuevo compaรฑero; es increรญble, pero no resulta tediosa. Por ahรญ se les ingenia para ponerlo en ridรญculo al tal Gustavo. Se ve que hay algo de รฉl con el casco que se incompatible con ciertas ansiedades de ella. No hubo forma de desviarla del tema. Es notorio que a vez le subyuga y le repugna: la moto, el marido, no sรฉ.
Estuve haciendo serios esfuerzos para recordar algunos ejercicios. No hubo caso. Es como si me instalara una sรกbana entre los ojos y el cerebro. La razรณn de la desmemoria estรก ahรญ: en los colores, las formas, la mayor yo menor nitidez, los ritmos. La capacidad letal de los acontecimientos.
Por ejemplo la bajada del aviรณn. Sรฉ que nos aterrizamos en Aeroparque porque alguien me lo dijo despuรฉs, no sรฉ cuando. Pero no puedo, no puedo conseguir esa parte de la pelรญcula. Salto del pleno vuelo a los camiones que nos transportan a Villa Devoto. Se me borrรณ el aterrizaje, se me borrรณ lo que siguiรณ hasta empezar a circular por el inconfundible vapor de Buenos Aires. Siento la asfixia todavรญa, los chorros que me brotaban de la espalda, siento la deshidrataciรณn como si ahora me estuvieran obligando a tragar una sandรญa entera. Con la intensidad. Veo gris y veo verde, tengo pegados el verde y el gris.
Pero hay fuertes huecos irrecuperables.
Che, es tarde. Voy a ver si me duermo. Me arden los ojos; se me rompiรณ una patilla de los lentes. Causa, le regalรฉ a David en Mรฉxico el รบnico buen estuche que tenรญa. Annie me regalรณ uno mejor, pero el perรญodo intermedio fue fatal. Asรญ que corto. Contestรก enseguida. El tiempo pasa raudo. Y tambiรฉn veloz. (ยฟYa te lo dije?)
El ser humano que gana espacio en mis interiores da gruesos saltos en su esfuerzo para ser amistoso. Paciencia: la lucha contra el cรกncer, el desplazamiento de la historia respecto de la lรญnea de los deseos, los desfiles militares, la sombra que proyecta el edificio de enfrente sobre tu casa, moderan el espรญritu.
Chau. Besos a los conocidos o queridos en comรบn. A vos mi amor, como siempre.
Sara.
P.D. Esa foto que me mandaste de tu hija con una gallina en brazos es tan estรบpida que me resultรณ ineludible su inclusiรณn entre las demรกs, tan
lindas todas. Besos.
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LETTER TO AUBERVILLIERS, FRANCE
A Juliana, que es Estela
Santa Barbara, January 2, 1984
What an effect this type of earthquake, or as you may call them aftershocks! (Itโs never too late my dear!); because they are like pins placed in strategic parts of the brain. I mean, the catharsis never come alone: the Paranรก river descends from Matto Grosso and drags with it varied specimens. The water hyacinths, Juliana, and the piranha. Of the water hyacinth, Iโm sure. And I wonder why the piranha donโt come as far as Rosario.
We are advancing, headlong, through the first days of 1984. And, also, quickly. Others are capable of separating themselves from the buildup and from those years. With me, I let myself enter into facts that are always likely to remain. It is not by chance. Donโt believe in coincidences. I’m trying to place myself at point of escape from all possible views, to drag out a story in which the axis will be placed at the time of the moving of prisoners from the basement in Rosario to Villa Devoto. I go round and round like a glove in a trance to defeat myself.
Then, you understand. Once I asked ty to answer in a letter my questions about your torture. We two know even the inflections that you use in you voice in those cases. But I forced myself, for my question and for my question and for your answers, and I went forward with the novel that I was writing. Now, the same recourse.
Last night I couldnโt sleep: that one about the kid who is born with a defect. And this morning, going to work, when we had already left the house, I realized that I was still inside, looking for the door.
Santa Barbara is wild and I take advantage of it. It opens its legs and shakes with sunlight and abundance. Here people never die. Whereas the Paranรก, you saw, grates on your nerves. The snakes, all that it deposits for us at the end of its journey. Do you hear whatโs coming? The Paranรก is born in Brazil at the confluence of the Paranaiba and Grande. This memory that I wear out has to be a product of an intravenous injection applied by the old lady of Geography. There is no other way to explain it.
From the basement to Villa Devoto. It is impossible to remember the totality of it: Blanca always had the shadow of a mustache, more pronounced that is recommended. That day, they had turned black, they cut her face in half. She was handcuffed to Tania. Tania so tall and she so short, with her mustache and her clothing in a blue bag, made from a pair of jeans a pair of those hands, almost magical, that we all began to have. Tell me about Paris, no?, or you donโt live there, or are you shut up in the apartmentโs bathroom? In the kitchen? I hope weโre dealing with the bedroom.
Your street must be like one in Posadas. Cobblestone, between each stone, some plant sticking out, on some leaf in full charge for foodstuff, In that way, a street in Posadas occurred to me, beyond being splashed by blows that the Paranรก gives out when it goes crazy. On the other blocks of Paris, bird cries, broken beer bottle, incestuous and tangled rain out to splash them, Iโm sure. Work with me and confirm it.
Who were you handcuffed to? I donโt remember having seen anyone near you at that moment. But what I forget is that, having arrived at Devoto, Mercedes entered the pavilion that they assigned to us and vomited almost to her heart. With that, she sent to the pipes of the latrines all that seemed a transfer of political prisoners and its possible implications. Remarkable.
Pavilion 31! Seriously. Remarkable.
Where would Flora be?; the one who washed the clothing when it was her turn, of everyone except hers and took care of the only rope in the bathroom as if it were nothing. How would be that tight face she had? Sheโs probably choosing appropriate bars of powdered soap in Senegal and its environs. Itโs possible that in so many years of exile, sheโs acquired an automatic washer. It depends: I donโt know what level of specialization she has acquired.
Your mother wrote me for my birthday. She feels like a flower at nine oโclock in the morning of a Buenos Aires summer. I donโt want to be redundant, but I am jealous of you. A mother like Adelina!
You live forgiving yourself. I fear being reiterative. And to ask the military bastards is they care about repeating methods, borrowing them, wasting them. Thatโs to say, donโt bother. Donโt ask them anything.
I feel as if I were very concentrated in put a finger in some hole.
That flag, that which we left hanging in the basement bathroom before they took us away. I donโt know, I never stopped completing in my head a picture with the hands of the security guards, interrupted in some form of amazement, suspended between the flag and their bellies. Their tits, without being able to decide whether to tear it down. To touch it: to embrace the devil. Not sky blue, white and sky blue, my dear: only sky blue and white. Can you imagine it? So pure, those colors.
Embrace the devil. The fingertips coming near you. He must be hot, wherever you touch him. The feverish eyes, and that pointed beard that most provoke much desire, but much desire to be supported,. No? No doubt: if Mandinga appears to me, I prove it. Great little siesta! And nothing of forget about it. There must be a lot to learn.
To get under the sheets. The blankets weighing on my left side. Yes. I take a shower and go on to bed.
I was thinkingโwater is a sacrament–to make a resolution, to choose, is like losing a finger from your hand in a voluntary act, and acquire three more on the other, just like that, suddenly. You donโt despair too much. You already know: warming-up. Remember the future story. I am opening the first hole. Although I may also be working myself up to something called taking a jump. Itโs nothing new; I know. My jumps take the form of liver attacks, but they are foreseeable. Itโs magnificent to opt for, to choose. Isnโt it like singing Yesterday, modulating slowly, with your own lips, with your own lips, each word, giving them form, one by one, using every muscle, the teeth, the whole mouth, lying on a hammock from which the only view is of a transparent fountain full of almost violet cherries and a white plane taking off? Before the security guard secured me with the handcuffs I think with Sonia, and he sat us down with a brutal push, onto the platform without seats, he said as another blow, a you canโt look. I hardly raised my head. By then, almost all the compaรฑeras were placed in rows, seated in the Buddha position on the floor, shackled to the steel floor, the heads down and the free arm on the nape of the neck. I swear to you that I took an eternal photo of it, for the posterity of this spectacle.
The shackles and the handcuffs were the blood spot on the egg; they were an absolute, a fiction. A party of powers was mobilized around every eye, of every lip, halting the impulse to gestate sounds.
Some pairs of laced boots also provoked their own accident against shoulders, heads, among the faces that were trying to readjust their angle, by setting an angle of totality and the solidity of the heels. I was already in the military airplane, tied up through and through. Bonavena finished off, imagine it.
The day was long. I was trying to accept the situation with a bit of our philosophy โwhat are you going to do?,โ but my delirium didnโt function at those latitudes.
Very soon I was to discover, and nothing less than the by buzzing of a bee, an unusual teacher, who spent fifteen minutes of its lifeโof mineโcharging with his head against the window glass. And donโt try your logic on me, yes, he was a pedant. And didnโt I say to you earlier. And I didnโt give him free passage because I stayed there following him in his process of softening, his consecration to the cause. You would have seen her retreat and take strength and throw herself against the light until scratching the glass from one end to the other. The house reserves the right of admission. Donโt move a hair if you question my verisimilitude. Sounds familiar?
She didnโt get out alone, because you could see that she was stunned and couldnโt complete the operation. She leaned against the edge of the window, with a victimโs face; so, I opened it for her.
Juliana, tell me, do you remember that white cotton dress, with black flowers that didnโt fit either of us very well, and that my mother sewed soon after freedom? Last night, walking on State, I in the shop window one that was very similar. It produced in me a single effect: desire to whip the air with a pair of more or less evil shouts.
And it is so dirty for decades in the area of Rosario, I mean the riverโit is so clean; the next taskโthat tempts you to submerge yourself, swim underwater, because we already know everything that can make the plants and the mud come together. Can you imagine? Some treasures are invaluable; Iโd go for a humble single by Jimmy Hendrix, the Antidhuring and a good dictionary of synonyms. Well, the better, more useful, the quicker. The quicker you get if off of you.
We had to be ready in twenty minutes with a change of clothes. Where were we going to find the patience to delay ourselves for an eternity. In half the time, we were already waiting, united by a very physical electric current that kept out stomachs and throats active. But that which troubled me: you know what it is?: the possibility that nobody would understand at that moment the essence of the problem: because if we didnโt capture the core thing. But no, neither am I sure. Tell me what it was that made us say goodbye as if we were going to die. We put on white gazes, compact chalk, firm a against the foreheads. We study the paleness, the wrinkles, the recent white hairs, we correct the defects in our hair or we pull out some loose threads, fluff.
Some memories are amputated. But it doesnโt cost me anything to provoke in myself an effect of neurons. To put back images and the sensations return intact.
I received a letter from Virginia. The whole thing was about a motorcycle that her new boyfriend bought: itโs incredible, but it didnโt turn out to be boring. They worked it out there to make a certain Gustavo look ridiculous. It seems that there is something about him with his helmet that was incompatible with certain of her anxieties. There was no way of diverting her from the subject. Itโs strange that at the same time it charms her and repulses her: the motorcycle, the husband, I donโt know.
I was trying very hard to remember some exercises. There was no way. It is as if I put a sheet between my eyes and my brain. The reason for the amnesia is there: in the colors, the greater or lesser definition, the rhythms. The lethal possibility of the events.
For example, leaving the plane. I know that we landed in Aeroparque because someone told me later, I donโt know when. But I canโt, I canโt obtain that part of the movie. A leap from the full plane to the trucks that transported us to Villa Devoto. The landing is erased, what happened after that is erased until beginning to circle through the unmistakable air of Buenos Aires. I still feel the asphyxia, the streams that that burst from my back, I feel the dehydration as if even now they were forcing me to swallow a whole watermelon. With the intensity. I see gray and I see green. Iโm stuck on the green and the gray.
But there are strong memories that are not recuperable.
Che, itโs late. Iโm going to see if I can sleep. My eyes are burning; one of the arms of my eyeglasses broke. The reason. In Mexico, I lent the only good case that I had. Annie gave me a better one, but the intervening period was fatal. So, now Iโll stop. Answer immediately. The time passes quickly. And, also, fast. (Did I say that to you already?)
The human being who wins space in my insides makes difficult jumps in its force to be friendly. Patience: the fight against cancer, the historical displacement with respect to the direction of desires, the military parades, the shadow that the building in front projects onto your house, moderate the spirit.
Chau. Kisses to the acquaintances or dear ones in common. My love to you, as always.
P.S. That photograph of your daughter with the hen in her arms is that you sent me is so stupid that that its inclusion is unavoidable with the others, the others so pretty. Kisses.
Pasos bajo el agua, Buenos Aires: Contrapunto 1987 Cรณrdoba: Alciรณn, reeditada en 2006, traducida al inglรฉs como Steps Under Water y alalemรกn como Schritte unter Wasser.
259 saltos, uno inmortal, Cรณrdoba: Narvaja 2001, traducida al inglรฉs como 259 Leaps, the Last Immortal.
Patas de avestruz, Cรณrdoba: Alciรณn, traducida al alemรกn como Straussenbeine.
En Buenos Aires, hay una plรฉtora de sinagogas que sirven a la comunidad de 160,000 mil judรญos. La gran mayorรญa de los que pertenecen a las sinagogas son ortodoxos: Askenazรญ, de origen europeo y un nรบmero Sefardรญ, de origen de los descendientes de los que tuvieron que dejar Espaรฑa despuรฉs de 1492. Ademรกs, hay sinagogas de Masorti Olami (Conservadora) que tienen rabinos y cantores entrenados en el Seminario Judรญo-latinoamericano โMarshall Meyer ZโLโ. Hay dos templos reformistas. Y hay numerosos centros de Jabad Lubavitch, ultra-ortodoxo. Tambiรฉn, hay asociaciones de judรญo laรฏcos o culturales
In Buenos Aires, there is a plethora of synagogues that serve the community of 160,000 Jews. The vast majority of those who belong to synagogues are Orthodox: Ashkenazi of European origin, and Sephardic, of origin from the descendants of those who had to leave Spain after 1492. In addition, there are synagogues of Masorti Olami (Conservative) whose rabbis and singers were trained in the Jewish-Latin American Seminary “Marshall Meyer Z” L “. There are two reform temples. And there are numerous centers of Chabad Lubavitch, ultra-orthodox. There are also associations of non-believing or cultural Jews.
Leonor Coifman, ha cursado estudios en las Escuelas Nacionales de Arte Manuel Belgrano y Prilidiano Pueyrredรณn, estudiรณ Historia del Arte con Cรณrdova Iturburu, Crรญtica Plรกstica con Moraรฑa y perfeccionamiento plรกstico con Juan Muรฑeza, habiendo realizado labor docente en escuelas de la Municipalidad de la Ciudad de Buenos Aires y en su taller de Libre Expresiรณn para niรฑos.
Ha realizado numerosas exposiciones colectivas e individuales en conocidas instituciones tales como el Fondo Nacional de las Artes, el salรณn Isidoro Steimberg, Universidad de Belgrano, Ateneo Popular de la Boca, Sociedad de artistas Plรกsticos, Cรญrculo Hebreo Argentino, Teatro Municipal General San Martรญn, Manzana de las Luces, Planetario Galileo Galilei, etc.Ha expuesto en las ciudades mรกs importantes del Perรบ, en la Ciudad espaรฑola de Vigo, en Mรฉxico (Primera Bienal Iberoamericana de Pintura).
Leonor Coifman, has studied at the Manuel Belgrano and Prilidiano Pueyrredรณn National Art Schools, studied Art History with Cรณrdova Iturburu, Art Criticism with Moraรฑa and advanced art with Juan Muรฑeza, having done teaching work in schools of the Municipality of the City of Buenos Aires and in its Free Expression workshop for children.
He has made numerous collective and individual exhibitions in well-known institutions such as the National Arts Fund, the Isidoro Steimberg room, the University of Belgrano, Ateneo Popular de la Boca, the Society of Plastic Artists, the Argentine Hebrew Circle, the General San Martรญn Municipal Theater, Manzana. de las Luces, Planetarium Galileo Galilei, etc. He has exhibited in the most important cities of Peru, in the Spanish City of Vigo, in Mexico (First Ibero-American Biennial of Painting.)
Libro Artista: Tema de Luz/ Artist’s Book: Theme of Light
The candle burns in my window/I, Leonor Coifman, about to turn/eighty-one follow it’s dance, hoping that it with/ it’s light dissipate my shadows and illuminate my world/ and the whole world. /And while the story comes to my memory of the Rabbi and his teaching in “While the Candle Burns” life/ there is still time to repair, to reinvent one’s self, to begin again, to return to make mistakes again and/ to get up again, despite the/shadows that accompany us,/While a candle burns in my window, the light shines, I have life. — Leonor CoifmanOn Shabbat, Genie lights the additional/candles, in honor of the many grandmothers, that she found to be Jewish/but had never/been able to light the Sabbath candles./On lighting these candles/Genie imagines them/standing at her side/sharing that/sacred moment. — After centuries,/her Jewish condition. — GenieWhat appears to be an act of faith/to light the candles to welcome Shabbat/ to thank life, is a gift to the soul./while two doves wait to take off,/ carrying a message of light. — Martha WolffWhat signs are there in the sky,/I can’t decipher from them/what mystery is hidden in my being/that I can’t decipher (find.) I walk in my soul/move blindly looking for signs./figuring out day by day/what I live (or what I dream)/Knowing that the first road/ is for the inside and that later/I will be able fly off through the world. — Leonor CoifmanA candle, lit, chalice of fire,/between the sky that says goodbye to the day,/its clarity dying in order to give itself/ to the penumbra of the night. small among the immensity that surrounds it/is for Shabbat, the little universe./that prays thanking the Divine Light. — Martha WolffBits of Time Lived — Life is not delivered with/an expiration date, and when that date/approaches us, with serenity and fear,/ we look at ita course and like a puzzle, we begin to put together the times live/with pressure and with love. — Leonor CoifmanQuestions and Answers — November 19, 2014,/at nightfall, whenever we have the courage/to ask our being what it needs,/dawn will break and on our pillow/will be the answer./Our life cannon be lived by others, life has to be lived with a passion/so intense, that it hurts./To know that it was fought for/cried over, laughed over and that/is the only way that I know about, to know/that I am here, doing it. Deserving of being Alive.Two candles brighten, two doves/ pairing with the believer and with the Creator/ creating an invisible union of love/ and celebration. — Martha WolffBuilding Dreams — History speaks of our wisdom/ among the nations and it is necessary ro remind then/ again. Everyone of us, will be a/ bastion with a common front against/ discrimination, hatred and ignorance./ Let us be the dignified transmitters of our legacy/ for future generations, so the Miracle of Light is not lost. – Leonor CoifmanI am fertile earth, which has been seeded/ since a time without history, Seeds of Faith./ My soul conserves deep roots from/ immemorial time, of epopeyas/of vast passages which tenuous threads unite/ with infinite skies, whirlwinds of light and darkness,/that populate the spiralled trip/ in lapsus of life and death. — Leonor Coifman
De todas las sinagogas de Argentina, la gran mayorรญa estรกn en Buenos Aires, la capital, que refleja en parte, el hecho de que hasta 80% de los judรญos del paรญs viven dentro o cerca de Buenos Aires. La Seminario Rabรญnico “Marshall Meyer Z”L” queda allรญ tanto como las sedes culturales la Asociaciรณn Mutual Israelita Argentina y La Hebraica y tambiรฉn el Congreso Judรญo-Latinoamericano. Y hay redes de escuelas judรญas y programas deportivas.
La situaciรณn en el interior del paรญs es bien diferente. En las otras ciudades grandes, Cรณrdoba, Rosario y Tucumรกn, el nรบmero de judรญos no pueden soportar mรกs de dos o tres sinagogas. En otros lugares, los socios luchan para mantenerse en comunidades o kehilot mucho mรกs chicas. Estas sinagogas existen desde el calor de la provincias del Chaco y Resistencia hasta el frรญo de Tierra del Fuego en el sur. Son ortodoxos or masorati olam (Conservadores). Recientemente, Jabad Lubavitch, la organizaciรณn ultra-ortodoxa, ha extendido sus servicios religiosos y sociales a lugares que antes tenรญa poca vida judรญa.
En las provincias de Entre Rรญos y Santa Fe quedan sinagogas chicas fundadas a fines del siglo XIX en las colonias agrรญcolas en la pampa. Ahora unas pocas de estas sinagogas son activas; las otras han vuelto a ser museos de la รฉpoca de “los gauchos judรญos”, los primeros pioneros judรญos en la Argentina.
Of all the synagogues in Argentina, the vast majority are in Buenos Aires, the capital, which reflects in part the fact that up to 80% of the country’s Jews live in or near Buenos Aires. “Marshall Meyer Z”L” Rabbinical Seminary is there as well as the cultural headquarters of the Argentine Israelite Mutual Association and La Hebraica and also the Jewish-Latin American Congress. And there are networks of Jewish schools and sports programs.
The situation in the interior of the country is quite different. In the other large cities, Cรณrdoba, Rosario and Tucumรกn, the number of Jews cannot support more than two or three synagogues. In other places, members struggle to stay in much smaller communities or kehilรก. These synagogues exist from the heat of the provinces of Chaco and Resistencia to the cold of Tierra del Fuego in the south. They are orthodox or masorati olam (Conservatives). Recently, Chabad Lubavitch, the ultra-Orthodox organization, has extended its religious and social services to places that previously had little Jewish life.
In the provinces of Entre Rรญos and Santa Fe there are still small synagogues founded at the end of the 19th century in the agricultural colonies on the pampas. Now a few of these synagogues are active; the others have returned to being museums from the time of “the Jewish gauchos”, the first Jewish pioneers in Argentina.
Identidad y diversidad: Libro de Artista , cada uno de los catorce artistas visuales judรญos latinoamericanos reacciona a travรฉs del arte a un poema de cada uno de los catorce poemas de un poeta judรญo latinoamericano. Ninguno de los artistas simplemente ilustrรณ el poema, sino que utilizรณ pintura, dibujo, grabado y fotografรญa para expresar su comprensiรณn de la poesรญa. Por lo tanto, la poesรญa y el arte, conectados, crean una sinergia que expande enormemente el poder de ambos. Luego se agregaron las traducciones de los poemas al inglรฉs para que una audiencia mรกs amplia pudiera apreciar el efecto acumulativo de la interacciรณn de la poesรญa y el arte. Como la de los poetas, la obra de los artistas incorpora los valores judรญos con la cultura de su paรญs de nacimiento de adopciรณn: Argentina, Uruguay, Mรฉxico, Brasil, Costa Rica, Cuba, Perรบ, Bolivia y Venezuela: dos de Argentina se habรญan asentado en Israel. Los catorce poemas tratan temas centrales de la experiencia judรญa latinoamericana: la identidad judรญa, el Holocausto, el sentido de ser o no ser igual a otros ciudadanos en una Repรบblica latinoamericana, el bombardeo del centro comunitario AMIA en Buenos. Aires en 1994, Israel, Sefarad (Espaรฑa medieval antes de la Expulsiรณn), la Biblia y la Cabalรก.
Al crear cada uno de los libros de artista separados, de 17 โde alto por 11โ de ancho, el poema, el arte original y el poema en inglรฉs y las biografรญas breves de los poetas y las artes se encuadernaron en un gran trozo de cartรณn pesado doblado; cada combinaciรณn, entonces, se convirtiรณ en un libro de artista individual. Los catorce llevan el mismo diseรฑo de portada que unifica al grupo. Este artรญculo de โAmรฉrica Latina judรญaโ y el que le sigue son entradas del catรกlogo de una exposiciรณn que se exhibiรณ en el Museo Judรญo de Buenos Aires, la Librerรญa El Pรฉndulo-Polanco de la Ciudad de Mรฉxico y, en Estados Unidos, en el Consulado Argentino en Nueva York, Northeastern University, University of Texas-Austin, University of Denver, Arizona State University, University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee y Emmanuel College en Boston. Permanecen en exhibiciรณn permanente en el Centro Schusterman de Estudios Judรญos de la Universidad de Texas-Austin.
Los creadores del proyectos son Perla Bajder, Irene Jaievsky y Stephen A. Sadow
In this collection Identity and Diversity: Artist Book, each of fourteen Latin American Jewish visual artists react through art to one poem by each of fourteen poems by a Latin American Jewish poet. None of the artists simply illustrated the poem, but rather uses painting, drawing, engraving and photography to express their understanding of the poetry. Hence, poetry and art, connected, create a synergy that greatly expands the power of both. The translations of the poems into English were then added so that a broader audience could appreciate the cumulative effect of the interaction of poetry and art. Like that of the poets, the work of the artists incorporates Jewish values with the culture of their country of birth of adoption: Argentina, Uruguay, Mexico, Brazil, Costa Rica, Cuba, Peru, Bolivia and Venezuela: two from Argentina had settled in Israel. The fourteen poems deal with central issues of the Latin American Jewish experience: Jewish identity, The Holocaust, the sense of being or not being an equal to other citizens in a Latin American Republic , the bombing of the AMIA community center in Buenos Aires in 1994, Israel, Sepharad (medieval Spain before the Expulsion,) the Bible and Kabbalah.
In creating each of the separate artist books, 17โ high by 11โ wide, the poem, the original art and the poem in English and short biographies of the poets and arts were bound into a large folded piece of heavy cardboard; each combination, then, became an individual artistโs book. All fourteen bear the same cover design which unifies the group. This post in โJewish Latin Americaโ and the one that follows it entries from the catalogue of an exhibit that was shown in the Jewish Museum of Buenos Aires, the El Pรฉndulo-Polanco Bookstore in Mexico City, and, in the United States, at the Argentine Consulate in New York, Northeastern University, the University of Texas-Austin, The University of Denver, Arizona State University, the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee and Emmanuel College in Boston. They remain on permanent exhibition at the Schusterman Center for Jewish Studies at the University of Texas-Austin.
The projects creators are Perla Bajder, Irene Jaievsky y Stephen A. Sadow
Divina Gloria (Martha Gloria Goldsztern) naciรณ en Buenos Aires, Argentina en 1962, y es una actriz.comediante y cantante. En su rol de cantante ha interpretado un repertorio amplio y original, que incluye pop, rock, jazz, tango y otros ritmos tradicionales. Ademรกs, su particular estilo y personalidad la han destacado desde los inicios de su carrera, siendo considerada una representante de la vanguardia artรญstica argentina durante algรบn tiempo. Divina Gloria cursรณ estudios de teatro, baile, canto y actuaciรณn en el Instituto Lavardรฉn en Buenos Aires, de comedia musical en la escuela de Pepe Cibriรกn Campoy y se perfeccionรณ junto a Robertino Granados (teatro), Bill Hastings (musical), y Juan Virasoro y Rodolfo Olguรญn (danza). Tiene un hijo llamado Leรณn Goldsztern. Comenzรณ su carrera con el recordado humorista Alberto Olmedo en sus sketches. Participรณ en varias pelรญculas y obras teatrales y en los espectรกculos: Alicia maravilla, Vivitos y coleando, Locos recuerdos y Sin compasiรณn, entre otros. En televisiรณn, participรณ de รฉxitos masivos como No toca botรณn, El Gordo y el Flaco y Jugate conmigo . Ademรกs, participรณ en decenas de programas de ficciรณn, entre los que se destacan Chiquititas, Poliladron, Gasoleros, Costumbres argentinas y Cuando me sonreรญs. En el รกmbito del teatro protagonizรณ comedias, revistas, dramas y musicales, siendo dirigida por profesionales de la talla de Pepe Cibriรกn Campoy, Enrique Pinti, Jean Franรงois Casanovas, Carlos Evaristo, , Renata Schussheim, Hugo Sofovich y Alberto Ure. Su obra teatral Zeide Shike fue un รฉxito de pรบblico y de crรญtica, presentรกndose durante dos aรฑos consecutivos. En cine, formรณ parte de los elencos de reconocidas pelรญculas como Los gauchos judรญos, El manosanta estรก cargado, Los pilotos mรกs locos del mundo, Almejas y mejillones, Chicos ricos o Peperina. Su carrera discogrรกfica se iniciรณ en 1985, con el lanzamiento de Desnudita es mejor. En su repertorio discogrรกfico se combinan diferentes ritmos: el pop de Caliente, Lo divino y lo dorado y Mar de amores, el jazz en Las rosas del hampa y la world music de Shalom, Baby, donde se destacan los tangos en idisch que le aportaron una proyecciรณn internacional, que incluyรณ presentaciones en varias ciudades de los Estados Unidos y la emisiรณn en radios europeas e israelรญes. Tambiรฉn grabรณ como artista invitada junto a Willy Crook y Daniel Melingo, y es la voz principal de la orquesta de tango Karavanah, la cual fusiona mรบsica rioplatense con ciertos elementos de la mรบsica jasรญdica, con letras en yidis y algunos cรณvers de antiguos tangos.
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Divina Gloria, actriz de cine/movie actrice
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Divina Gloria (Martha Gloria Goldsztern) was born in Buenos Aires, Argentina, 1962, and is an actress, mediator and singer. In her role as a singer she has performed a wide and original repertoire, which includes pop, rock, jazz, tango and other traditional rhythms. In addition, her particular style and personality have highlighted her since the beginning of her career, being considered a representative of the Argentine artistic avant-garde for some time. Divina Gloria studied theater, dance, singing and acting at the Lavardรฉn Institute in Buenos Aires, musical comedy at the Pepe Cibriรกn Campoy school and perfected her skills with Robertino Granados (theater), Bill Hastings (musical), and Juan Virasoro and Rodolfo Olguรญn (dance). She has a son named Leon Goldsztern. She began her career with the well-remembered comedian Alberto Olmedo in his sketches. She participated in several films and plays and in the shows: Alicia marvel,Vivitos y coleando, Crazy memories and Sin compasiรณn, among others. On television, she participated in massive hits such as No toca button, El Gordo y el Flaco and Jugate conmigo In addition, she participated in dozens of fiction programs, including Chiquititas, Poliladron, Gasoleros, Argentine Customs and When I smile. In the field of theater, she starred in comedies, magazines, dramas and musicals, being directed by professionals such as Pepe Cibriรกn Campoy, Enrique Pinti, Jean Franรงois Casanovas, Carlos Evaristo,, Renata Schussheim, Hugo Sofovich and Alberto Ure. Her play Zeide Shike was a critical and public success, performing for two consecutive years. In cinema, she was part of the cast of well-known films such as The Jewish Gauchos, Manosanta is loaded, The craziest pilots in the world, Clams and mussels, Rich boys or Peperina. Her recording career began in 1985, with the release of Desnudita es mejor. In her record repertoire different rhythms are combined: the pop of Caliente, Lo divino y lo dorado and Mar de amores, jazz in Las rosas del underworld and the world music of Shalom, Baby, where the tangos in Yiddish that they contributed to her stand out. an international projection, which included presentations in several cities in the United States and broadcast on European and Israeli radios. She also recorded as a guest artist with Willy Crook and Daniel Melingo, and is the main voice of the Karavanah tango orchestra, which fuses River Plate music with certain elements of Hasidic music, with lyrics in Yiddish and some covers of ancient tangos.
Antonio Elio Brailovsky, Autor y periodista argentino, estudiรณ Economรญa Polรญtica y en la actualidad ejerce la docencia en universidades como las de Buenos Aires o Belgrano y como profesor visitante en universidades importantes fuera del paรญ.s. Es experto en la ecologรญa, especialmente la de Argentina. Ha publicado libros de texto, libros populares y ensayos ligados a sobre ecologรญa y economรญa. Como narrador, Brailovsky ha escrito tanto obras de teatro como novela y relato, siendo finalista de premios como La sonrisa vertical. Muchas de sus obras tratan temas judรญos. Entre su obra habrรญa que destacar tรญtulos como Me gustan sus cuernos, una novela erรณtica ambientada durante el periodo mรกs infame de la Inquisiciรณn Espaรฑola.
Antonio Elio Brailovsky, Argentine author and journalist, studied Political Economy and currently teaches at universities such as Buenos Aires and Belgrano as well as being a visiting professor in many international universities. He is an expert in ecology, especially that of Argentina. He has published textbooks, popular books, and essays on ecology and economics. As a narrator, Brailovsky has written both plays and novels and short stories, being a finalist for awards such as The Vertical Smile. Many of his works deal with Jewish themes. His work includes titles such as I like their Horns, an erotic novel set during the most infamous period of the Spanish Inquisition.
Eraentonces toda tierra de una lenguay unas mismas palabras. Y aconteciรณ que, se partieron de Oriente, hallaron una vega en la tierra de Shinar, y asentaron allรญ. Y dijeron los unos a los otros. Y dijeron los unos a los otros: Vaya, hagamos un ladrillo y cozรกmoslo con fuego y fueles el ladrillo en lugar de piedra y el betรบn en lugar de mezcla. Y dijeron: Vamos, edifiquรฉmos una ciudad y una torre, cuya cรบspide llegue al cielo, y hagรกmonos un nombre, por si fuรฉramos esparcido sobre la faz de la tierra. (Gรฉnesis: XI, 1-4)
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Al caer la tarde, Daniel caminรณ lentamente por la llanura verde, en cuya lejanรญa se adivinaban las ovejas y los las columnas de humo en las casa de los campesinos. Y entrรณ en esta esplanada enorme, de arcilla cocido y estรฉril, donde no crecรญan plantas ni jugaban los niรฑos, sino que se elevaba solitaria y oscura, amenazado nubes sin poder ser una de ellas. Habรญan empezado a construirla en una hondonada, para no contar con la ventaja desde el principio, para que fuera obra exclusivamente de ellos, para que no restar la posibilidad de un apoyo ni siquiera de las fuerzas del suelo.
A medida que la sombra caรญa sobre รฉl, Daniel cruzaba por caminos y montaรฑas de ladrillos crudos y ladrillos reciรฉn cocidos, y ladrillos rotos y pulverizados que formaban que formaban puentes por encima de lagos de betรบn pestilente, para no contar armazones de troncos pulidos y gastados por el tiempo que habรญan sido utilizados para subir ladrillos, con sol y con aguaceros en en รฉpoca de siembra, de cosecha y granizo, cuando los hombres olvidaban todas sus ocupaciones y se treparon a ellos para ayudarse con subir ladrillos y acercarlos a la gran obra.
Y la obra misma, hecha para desafiar el cielo que casi se tocaba con las manos, pero que iban descubriendo se alejaba a medida que la torre iba creciendo, y la torre tenรญa que estar terminada para darle un nombre, para que el pueblo de Daniel pudiera salir del anonimato y ser nombrado, como lo serรญan los pueblos que vendrรญan despuรฉs.
Daniel creyรณ oรญr todavรญa los ecos de voces agitadas en el campo, residuos sembrados por la discusiรณn de la tarde. Los hombres se habรญan reunidos llevando sus cuernos de caza, para discutir acerca de aquel sentido de aquella obra que les habรญan llegado los padres de sus padres. Desde tiempos inmemoriales venรญan construyendo una ciudad en forma de una torre, sin vivir en ella, porque el orรกculo decรญa que no podรญa ser habitada antes de estar concluida, Como si este cuerpo que habitamos–pensaba Daniel–estuviera realmente construido alguna vez.
Esta obra, dijeron los prรญncipes de los mercercaders, es muestra de nuestro poder y deberรก ser terminada con cualquier esfuerzo, con cualquier sacrificio.
Pero esa torre oscura era una prisiรณn a la que los hombres ofrendaban los mejores aรฑos de su vida, para hacer una escalera que no parecรญa llevar a ninguna parte. Los hombres miraban esas montaรฑas de ladrillos nuevos y listos al tacto, que resonaban al ser golpeados ligeramente que reemplazarรญan los viejos y quebradizos que habรญan puestos sus abuelos. Pensaron en sus propias casas, de barro crudo y dudaron.
Las mujeres miraron las laderas resecas y antiguas de la torre, y los otros contrafuertes, nuevos y brillantes que los hombres acababan a construir, y volvieron a aรฑorar la noche de tibias y silenciosas junto al lugar, donde hablaron del trabajo del dรญa o de los hijos que iban creciendo, en vez de estas noches agitadas y ruidosas, en que las carretas pasaban continuamente, llevando ladrillos y herramientos y se oรญan los gritos de los capataces, mientras sus hombres estaban afuera, levando nuevas explanadas a la luz de las antorchas.
Hablaron los artesanos que dibujaron los nuevos planos sobre enormes canteros de arcilla. Explicaron que desde antes del tiempo habรญan comenzado a levantar una torre maciza, y รฉsta crecรญa cada vez con mรกs lentitud, dado que tenรญan que ensanchar continuamente su base. Ese ensachamieto no era proporcional a la altura, y cada vez que lograban hacer crecer la torre el equivalente al alto de un hombre, debรญan construir nuevos terraplenes y murallas y contrafuertes, de manera que los que vivรญan cerca tenรญan que mudar sus casas periรณdicamente, a medida que el torre extendรญa hacia el campo abierto y tapaba trigales, bloqueaba arroyos y se apoyaba sobre las colinas que formaban el horizonte.
Hasta que los hombres llegaron a preguntarse si la tierra era suficiente grande para sustentar una torre de tamaรฑo requerido, y decidieron medirla antes de proseguir la construcciรณn, con gran enojo de los mercaderes y sus prรญncipes que, supieron en ese momento, tenรญan el acto de edificar como un fin en sรญ mismo, sin que les importara realmente la terminaciรณn de la torre,
Se separaron, asรญ, se dirigieron a los cuatro confines del mundo, a pie o en carretas pesadas, de ruedas anchas, tiradas por bueyes de cuernos romos y cabeza gacha, que arrastraban un sinnรบmero de pertenencias inรบtiles, por medio de las cuales los hombres querรญan llevar la ilusiรณn de seguir estando allรญ. Otros iban en caballos ligeros, como escapando una pesadilla, sin volver la cabeza atrรกs. Daniel terminรณ su lento paseo, recogiรณ un trocito de ladrillo para alimentar recuerdos y se dirigiรณ al rรญo, donde lo esperaba un barco de velas blancas y proa elevada, pintado de rojo oscuro. Se despidiรณ de sus amigos, con la promesa de volver a reunirse y completar la obra.
Everyone on earth on earth had the same language and the same words. And as they migrated from the east, they came upon a valley in the land of Shinar and settled there. They said to one another, “Come let us make bricks and burn them hard.” –Brick served them as stone and bitumen as mortar–And they said, “Come let us build a city, and a tower with its top in the sky to make a name for ourselves, else we be scattered all over the world. (Genesis, XI, 1-4) — The Jewish Study Bible.
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As the afternoon began, Daniel walked slowly through the green plains, in the distance, the sheep and the columns of smoke coming from the peasantโs houses. And he entered this enormous esplanade, of cooked clay and sterile, where plants didnโt grow and children didnโt play, but rose up solitary and dark, threatening the clouds without being able to be one of them. They had begun to build it in a hollow/ravine, so as not to count on an advantage from the start, so that the work be exclusively theirs, so that there be no possibility of help even from the forces of the ground.
As the shadow fell over him, Daniel crossed through paths and mountains of raw bricks, bricks recently baked, and broken bricks and pulverized that formed bridges above lakes of pestilential bitumen, to not mention frames made of tree trunks, polished and worn by time that had been us to bring up bricks, in the sun and during downpours in during the times of planting, harvest and hail, when the men forgot their jobs and climbed there to help raise bricks and bring them close to the great work.
And the work itself, made to challenge the sky that could be almost touched with their hands, but that they went on discovering that it became more distant as the tower kept on growing, and the tower hand to be finished in order to give it a name, so that Daniel’s town could leave anonymity and be named as would be the towns that would come later on.
Daniel believed he still heard echoes of the agitated voices in the land, residuals planted by the afternoon’s discussion. The men had met carry their hunting horns, to discuss that feeling of that work that the fathers of their fathers had bequeathed to them. Since time immemorial, they came building a city in the form of a tower, without living in it, because the oracle said that it could not be inhabited before being concluded. As is this body that we inhabit–Daniel thought– might really constructed once and for all.
This work, said the princes of the merchants, is an example of our power and should be completed with any effort, with any sacrifice.
But this dark tower was a prison to which the men offered by best year of their live, to build a staircase that didnโt seem to go anywhere. The men looked at those mountains of new bricks, ready for use, that rang on being lightly hit, that would replace the old and brittle ones that their grandfathers placed there. The thought of their own houses, of rough mud and they doubted.
The women looked at the towerโs dried out and ancient ladders, the buttresses, new and brilliant that the men had just built, and desired once again the warm and silent nest to the place, where they talked of the dayโs work of the children growing, instead of these agitated and noisy nights, in which the carts passed continually, carrying bricks and tools and the shouts of the foremen were heard, while the men were outside, weighing new terraces by torchlight.
The artisans said that they drew the new plans based on enormous plots of clay. They explained that since olden times, they had begun to raise up a solid tower, and this grew, more and more slowly given that they continually had to expand the base. This expansion wasnโt proportional to the height, and every time they succeeded to making the tower grow the height of a man, they had to construct new embankments and walls and buttresses, so that those who lived close by had to periodically move their houses, so that the tower extended toward open land and covered up wheat fields, blocked arroyos and were supported by the hills that were formed the horizon.
Until the men came to asked themselves if the land were sufficiently large to support a tower of the required size, and they decided to measure it before continuing the construction, to the great anger of the merchants and their princes, they came to the conclusion that they were involved in building as an end in itself, without really caring about the completion of the tower.
They separated and so, they headed for the four ends of the earth, on foot or with heavy wagons, with wide wheels, pulled by oxen with blunted horns and lowered heads, who pulled innumerable useless belonging, with which the men wanted to maintain the illusion of continuing being there. Others went on light horses, as if escaping a nightmare, without looking back. Daniel finished his slow walk, took a little piece of brick to feed memories and turned toward the river, where a ship with white sails and a high prow, painted in a dark red, awaited him. He said goodbye to his friends, with the promise to meet again and finish the work.
Literatura por Antonio Brailovsky/Literature by Antonio Brailovsky
Identidad, novela, Editorial Sudamericana, Buenos Aires, 1980. Reeditado bajo el tรญtulo: Isaac Halevy, rey de los judรญos, Buenos Aires, editorial Tusquets, 1997.
Libro de las desmesuras, cuentos, Editorial Celtia, Buenos Aires, 1984.
El asalto al cielo, novela, Editorial Sudamericana-Planeta, Buenos Aires, 1985.
Tiempo de opresiรณn, novela, Editorial de Belgrano, Buenos Aires, 1986.
Esta maldita lujuria, novela, Editorial Planeta, Buenos Aires, 1992 y Editorial Casa de las Amรฉricas, La Habana, 1992.
Me gustan sus cuernos, novela. Editorial Tusquets,Barcelona, 1995.
No abrirรกs esta puerta, novela. Editorial Atlรกntida, 1996.
Diana Wang naciรณ en Polonia en 1945, hija de sobrevivientes de la Shoรก. Llegรณ a la Argentina en 1947. Psicoterapeuta especializada en terapia de pareja (prรกctica privada). Escritora y conferencista. Hasta 2018: Desde โGeneraciones de la Shoรกโ: realizรณ una constante labor en difusiรณn y educaciรณn. Charlas, conferencias, seminarios en la Argentina y el exterior, en instituciones de educaciรณn formal e informal. Produjeron material educativo sobre las variadas temรกticas de la Shoรก, publican los Cuadernos de la Shoรก y han generado el โProyecto Aprendizโ para mantener viva la memoria oral de la Shoรก. Integran el capรญtulo argentino de la IHRA (International Holocaust Remembrance Alliance). . Desde 2018 miembro del Consejo de Administraciรณn del Museo del Holocausto de Buenos Aires. Continรบan los proyectos de โGeneraciones de la Shoรกโ en Argentina.
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Diana Wang was born in Poland in 1945, the daughter of survivors of the Shoah. She arrived in Argentina in 1947. Psychotherapist specializing in couples therapy (private practice). Writer and lecturer. Until 2018: with the โGenerations of the Shoahโ (Holocaust): worked dissemination and education. Talks, conferences, seminars in Argentina and abroad, in formal and informal educational institutions. Her groups produced educational material on the various themes of the Shoah, published the Cuadernos de la Shoรก (Shoah Notebooks) and generated the “Apprentice Project” to keep the oral memory of the Shoah alive. They are part of the Argentine chapter of Integran el capรญtulo argentino de la IHRA (International Holocaust Remembrance Alliance.) Since 2018, Diana Wang is a member of the Board of Directors of the Museum of the Holocaust of Buenos Aires. The โGenerations of the Shoahโ projects continue in Argentina.
Sobrevivientes de la Shoรก y sus descendientes en un trayecto de reconstrucciรณn.
Niรฑos de la Shoรก. Contar lo vivido, incluirlo en el contexto especรญfico, volver a mirarse, ubicarse en una nueva perspectiva y aprender de las propias experiencias, es lo que los sobrevivientes de la Shoรก y sus descendientes hemos encontrado desde que comenzamos a reunirnos. Nos recolectamos con la cadena de nuestro linaje familiar, aprendimos los unos de los otros y fuimos reconstruyendo nuestros pasados con nuevas piezas que respondรญan a oscuros interrogantes y aprendiendo lecciones รบtiles para el presente y el futuro.
Nos conocimos y comenzamos a reunirnos en 1997. Nos contamos nuestras historias y descubrimos con sorpresa cรณmo se parecรญan y cuรกntas cosas que creรญmos nos pasaban solo a nosotros eran compartidas por los demรกs.
Empezamos a ser โNiรฑos de la Shoรกโ porque casi todos habรญan sido muy chicos en aquel momento. Algunos, como yo misma, aunque nacimos poco despuรฉs, vimos que nuestras historias tambiรฉn tenรญan puntos en comรบn. Los nacidos despuรฉs de 1940 casi no tenรญan recuerdos y sus memorias debรญan ser indagadas y reconstruidas. Tambiรฉn los que nacimos una vez terminada la Shoรก buscรกbamos en nuestros pasados familiares los eslabones que nos faltaban para reconstruir la cadena con nuestros padres y abuelos. Suelo decir que lo mรกs importante que me pasรณ en la vida pasรณ antes de que yo naciera. Lo โmรกs importanteโ era lo que nos unรญa y lo que constituรญa un nido cariรฑoso en donde encontrar las claves que nos faltaban. Todos tenemos una relaciรณn รญntima y personal con la Shoรก y el compartirla nos regalรณ una nueva pertenencia, nos sentรญamos una familia.
Generaciones de la Shoรก. En 2004 emprendimos una gran aventura, el encuentro internacional que llamamos De Cara al Futuro con la asistencia de sobrevivientes, hijos, nietos, parientes, docentes, historiadores y personalidades de la cultura de varios paรญses. Este evento consolidรณ nuestra asociaciรณn que se formalizรณ y pasรณ a ser “Generaciones de la Shoรก” en Argentina.
Generaciones fue una instituciรณn muy particular en el contexto de las organizaciones judรญas locales, porque estaba integrada por muchas mujeres. Los hombres que nos acompaรฑaban se sorprendรญan de que pudiรฉramos estar hablando de cuatro cosas al mismo tiempo, no solo sobre lo que habรญa que hacer sino tambiรฉn sobre el estado de salud de cada uno, quรฉ hija estรก embarazada o quรฉ nieto tuvo un รฉxito en la escuela o mucha fiebre la noche anterior.
Una instituciรณn diferente. Claramente inventamos un modo particular distinto de los modelos usuales de las organizaciones judรญas locales. No habรญa diferencia entre la comisiรณn directiva que pensaba y decidรญa y quienes ejecutaban lo decidido. Los que integrรกbamos la Comitรฉ Directiva estรกbamos en todas las otras รกreas: discutรญamos, pensรกbamos, firmรกbamos cheques y, cuando hacรญa falta, tomรกbamos una escoba y barrรญamos el piso. Mientras generรกbamos materiales educativos bajรกbamos a abrir la puerta, cuando inventรกbamos proyectos innovadores estรกbamos tambiรฉn atentos a que no faltara el cafรฉ ni el tรฉ ni el mate ni el edulcorante ni las galletitas. Todos voluntarios, todos llevando adelante una misiรณn muy significativa, estรกbamos en nuestra casa con nuestra familia.
Eran reuniones fรฉrtiles, con un clima tan amable que daba gusto estar allรญ. Pero no sรณlo creรกbamos y difundรญamos materiales pedagรณgicos, tambiรฉn celebrรกbamos las fechas de nuestra tradiciรณn judรญa, festejรกbamos los cumpleaรฑos, nos acompaรฑรกbamos en las tristezas y nos alegrรกbamos con las alegrรญasโฆ constituรญamos una impensada nueva red entraรฑables, tal vez una compensaciรณn afectiva por lo que algunas de nosotros nos habรญa faltado en nuestras infancias.
Aprendimos de nuestros padres y sobrevivientes, a transformar la tragedia en una filosofรญa que privilegia la vida y le da sentido, contando hasta con alegrรญa quiรฉnes รฉramos y lo que habรญamos aprendido. Participamos intensamente en redes sociales y reaccionamos fuertemente ante la utilizaciรณn de la Shoรก para fines ajenos a ella, los lugares comunes y las mentiras. Frases como โnunca mรกsโ, โrecordar para no repetirโ, โpara las futuras generacionesโ, y tantas otras que escuchamos a diario, nos llevan una y otra vez a explicaciones y desmitificaciones. Rectificamos permanentemente informaciones falsas. Luchamos contra la banalizaciรณn cuando se menciona al nazismo, a Hitler o a Goebbels, como un sustantivo comรบn, como un insulto. Salimos al cruce de las declaraciones que toman los hechos a la ligera y superficialmente, que los tergiversa e impide revelar y comprender su contenido y alcance. Protestamos ante la espuria comparaciรณn entre la Shoรก y la polรญtica del Estado de Israel seรฑalando que el hoy llamado anti-sionismo es el mismo antisemitismo travestido.
Miembros de Generaciones de la Shoรก
Creamos tres proyectos que nos trascenderรกn: los Cuadernos de la Shoรก y el Proyecto Aprendiz I y II.
1.- Cuadernos de la Shoรก. Es una publicaciรณn destinada a los docentes que precisan una herramienta pedagรณgica exhaustiva para enseรฑar sobre el Holocausto. Cada Cuaderno (hay 8 publicados y el 9 a punto de salir) encara un tema especรญfico, los rescatadores, los niรฑos, las mujeres, las resistencias, la shoรก inmersa en la segunda guerra, la deshumanizaciรณn, las trayectorias, los genocidios del siglo XX. Cada nรบmero estรก estructurado alrededor de 3 ejes: la conceptualizaciรณn, el diseรฑo y la ilustraciรณn grรกfica y los testimonios personales que transmiten el aspecto humano involucrado.
2.- Proyecto Aprendiz I. Surgiรณ para asegurar que cada una de las historias siga siendo contada de manera presencial y oral. Cuando ya no haya sobrevivientes que cuenten lo vivido, El testimonio vivo permite la interacciรณn, la pregunta y llega directamente a cada oyente porque es entregado con la emociรณn de quien lo viviรณ. La idea es capacitar a adultos jรณvenes para contar, el dรญa de maรฑana, la historia de un sobreviviente particular. Durante tres meses de contacto directo, cada Aprendiz conoce, acompaรฑa y conversa con un sobreviviente. No es solo sobre sus vivencias en la Shoรก, tambiรฉn sobre su infancia, su vejez, sus ideales, sus alegrรญas, sus tristezas. El Aprendiz recibe e incorpora esa historia a su propia vida y se compromete a contarla en las siguientes dรฉcadas. Son en la actualidad 150 los Aprendices que tienen ahora esta nueva responsabilidad en sus vidas.
La superviviente Lea Zajac (derecha) y su aprendiz Darรญo Berlinerblau (izquierda), en Buenos Aires
3.- Proyecto Aprendiz II. Creamos una segunda etapa, la capacitaciรณn de los Aprendices en la construcciรณn de una charla breve, de hasta 20 minutos, contando la experiencia vivida al lado del sobreviviente y la manera en que fueron atravesados por ella en su propia vida. Cada charla se registra en video que se difunde por las redes sociales. Estas breves charlas tienen un fuerte potencial educativo. En una clase alcanza el tiempo para complementarlo con conceptualizaciones, comentarios, preguntas y actividades pedagรณgicas que aseguran la comprensiรณn de lo vivido.
Las charlas de estos adultos jรณvenes tienen un poderoso efecto sobre quienes las oyen. La anรฉcdota, la presencia viva, la emociรณn puesta en acto, son vehรญculos privilegiados para que la memoria se estimule y no se pierda en el olvido.
4. – Museo del Holocausto de Buenos Aires. En 2018 pasamos a integrar el Museo aunando esfuerzos y voluntariados. Aportamos lo que somos y lo que sabemos, los materiales que producimos y los testimonios a escuelas y universidades.
El sobreviviente Rudi Haymann
Dialogamos con distintos grupos, aprendemos y enseรฑamos, integramos el capรญtulo argentino de la Alianza Internacional para la memoria del Holocausto, acompaรฑamos con capacitaciones, testimonios y con nuestros sobrevivientes al programa Marcha por la Vida. Participamos de la Red Latinoamericana para la Enseรฑanza de la Shoรก y seguimos con los Cuadernos de la Shoรก y con el Proyecto Aprendiz. Este รบltimo estรก en proceso de reactualizaciรณn dado que el paso del tiempo hizo que ya no contemos con sobrevivientes para hacerlo. Entraremos al escenario los hijos de sobrevivientes con nuestras experiencias de haber crecido con las marcas que la Shoรก dejรณ en nuestros padres; tambiรฉn los nietos, ya mรกs libres del vรญnculo directo con los sobrevivientes, con una renovada capacidad de pregunta, investigaciรณn y memoria.
En sรญntesis. Durante la Batalla de Inglaterra, Sir Winston Churchill se refiriรณ a quienes lucharon diciendo que โnunca tan pocos habรญan hecho tanto por tantosโ. Somos, como aquel escuadrรณn de la RAF, un puรฑado de personas, con pequeรฑas voces que, antes desde Niรฑos de la Shoรก, Generaciones de la Shoรก y ahora desde el Museo, crecen y se amplifican, se vuelven fuertes y potentes en su persistencia por mantener viva la memoria de la Shoรก, generar conciencia para que el tan ansiado โnunca mรกsโ alguna vez lo sea.
Survivors of the Shoah and their descendants in a trajectory of reconstruction
Children of the Shoรก. To tell of what was lived, to include it in the chain of family descendance, to understand it according to the specific context, to look at it again, to put it into a new perspective and to learn from oneโs own experiences is what the survivors of the Shoah (Holocaust) and their descendants have found to be since we began to meet. We reconnected with the chain of our family lineage; we learned from each other and we went on reconstructing our pasts with new pieces that responded to obscure questions. We learned useful lessons for the present and for the future.
We began to meet regularly in 1997. We told our stories, and with surprise, we discovered how very similar were so many things we had believed happened only to each one of us, and were, in fact, shared with the others.
We began as the โChildren of the Shoah,โ because almost all of us had been very little at the end of the war. Some, including myself, though born a bit after that, saw that our stories also had points in common. Those born after 1940 have almost no early memories and so their โmemoriesโ had to be investigated and reconstructed. Also, those of us who were born after the Shoah sought in our familiesโ past the links that we lacked to reconstruct the chain of connections to our parents and our grandparents. I often say that most important thing that happened to me in my life, happened before I was born. That โmost Important thingโ was that which unified us and what became an affectionate nest in which to find the keys that we lacked. We all had an intimate and personal relationship with the Shoah, and sharing it gave us a new sense of belonging. We felt like a family.
A Different Type of Institution. Clearly, we invented a way of doing things that was different from the usual procedures of local Jewish organizations. There was no difference between the Board of was Directors who thought about and made decisions and those who carried out what decided upon. Those of us who were members of the Board, were active in all other areas: we participated discussions, thought, signed checks about programs, and when it was necessary, took a broom and swept the floor. While we generated educational materials, we went down to open the door; while we invented innovative projects, we also made sure that there was no lack of coffee, tea, mate, sweetener and crackers. All volunteers, we all developed a very meaningful mission, we were in our home with our family.
Generations of the Shoah. In 2004, we set out on a great adventure, an international conference that we called โFacing the Future. In attendance were survivors, children, grandchildren, relatives, teachers, historians and cultural figures from several countries. This event strengthened our association. It was formalized and began to be known as the โGenerations of the Shoahโ in Argentina. โGenerationsโ was a very unusual in the context of local Jewish organization, because it mainly consisted of women. The men who accompanied us were amazed that we were able to be talking about four things at the same time, not only what had to be done, but also the health of each one of us, whose daughter was pregnant or which grandson had done well at school or had a high fever the previous night.
These were fertile meetings, with such a pleasant environment that it was enjoyable to be there. But we didnโt only create and distributed pedagogic materials, we also celebrated the holidays of our Jewish tradition, celebrated birthdays, gave support during unhappy events and were happy about our joys. . .we constituted an unexpected new affective web with close ties, perhaps a compensation for what some of us had lacked during our childhoods.
We learned from our parents and survivors to transform the tragedy into a motive for living. We created a philosophy that valued life and gave it meaning, in the organization as well as in our own lives, recounting, almost with joy, who we were and what we had learned.
We participated intensely in social networks, and we reacted strongly against the use of the Shoah for reasons that were not connected to it. Phrases like โNever again,โ โRemember so not to repeat,โ โFor the future generationsโ and so many others that we heard every day, brought us back again and again to explanations and demystifications. We permanently rectified false information. We fought against the banalization when Nazism, Hitler or Goebbels were mentioned as a common noun, which we took as an insult. We came out against statements that treated the facts lightly or superficially. We repudiated statements that distorted the facts, for they impeded making the making them known and the understanding of their content and scope. We protested against the spurious comparison of the Shoah with the politics of the State of Israel, pointing that what is now called Anti-Zionism is the same old Anti-Semitism in disguise.
Members of Generations of the Shoah
We created three project that would go beyond what we had accomplished so far: the Cuadernos de la Shoรก (Notebooks of the Shoah) and Proyecto Aprendiz I y II (Project Apprentice I and 2 (Project Apprentice I and II).
1. Cuadernos de la Shoรก. The Cuadernos are a publication directed at teachers who require an exhaustive pedagogical tool for teaching about the Holocaust. Each Cuaderno (there are now eight published and a nineth about to come out) deals with a specific theme: the rescuers, the children, the women, the resistance, the Shoah as part of the Second World War, the dehumanization, the outcomes, the genocides of the twentieth century. Each book is structured around three central concepts: the definition and explanation of the main ideas, the design of the book and graphic illustrations, the personal testimonies of survivors that transmit the human aspect of those involved.
To Live with Evil: Genocides of the Twentieth Century
2. โ Project Apprentice I. Project Apprentice I was developed to assure that each one of the living survivorโs stories continue to be told in an oral and face-to-face way. The living testimony permits interaction and questioning and brings directly to each listener the emotion of someone who lived through it all. The idea is to train young adults to tell in the future, the history of a specific survivor. During three months of direct contact, each Apprentice gets to know, accompanies, converses with the survivor. This conversation treats not only the survivorโs experiences during the Shoah, but also her childhood, her old age, her ideals, her joys, her sorrows. The Apprentice receives and incorporates that story into his or her life and commits to retell it in the coming decades. There are now 150 Apprentices who now have this responsibility.
Survivor Lea Zajac (right) with her apprentice Darรญo Berlinerblau (left), in Buenos Aires
3. Project Apprentice II. We created a second level to these activities. The Apprentices were trained to develop a short talk, up to twenty minutes in length, in which they described their experiences living along with a survivor and the ways in which their own lives were affected by it. Each talk was recorded on videos that were distributed through social media. These brief talks have a strong potential in education. After showing a video in a single class, there is time left to complement it with concepts, commentaries, questions and pedagogic activities that assure the understanding of what had been lived through.
The talks by these young adults have a strong effect on those who hear them. The anecdote, the living presence, the immediacy of emotion are exceptional vehicles for stimulating memory and not allowing things to be forgotten.
4. Museum of the Holocaust in Buenos Aires. In 2018, Generations of the Shoah became part of the Museum of the Holocaust in Buenos Aires, combining forces and voluntary work. We contributed who we are and what we knew, the materials we produced and the presentations to schools and universities. We learn and we teach.
Conversations with Survivors: The survivor Rudi Haymann is interviewed from Chile
We were in dialogue with different groups. We formed the Argentine chapter of the International Alliance for the Memory of the Holocaust. With training sessions, testimonies, and with our survivors, we supported the March for Life. We participate in the Latin American Network for the Teaching of the Shoah. We continue with the Cuadernos de la Shoรก and Proyecto Aprendiz. This activity is in the process of reformulation, given that with the passage of time, we can no longer count on survivors to take part. We will encounter the situation of the children of the survivors like us with our own experience of having grown up with the scars left in our parents and also our grandchildren, now freer from the direct connection with the survivors, with a renewed capacity for questioning, investigation and memory.
In synthesis. During the Battle of Britain, Sir Winston Churchill referred to those who fought, saying that โnever have so few done so much for so many.โ We are like that squadron of the RAF, a handful of people, with small voices that as the Children of the Shoah, Generations of the Shoah and now from the Museum, grow and become louder, become strong and powerful in their persistence to keep alive the memory of the Shoah, generate consciousness so that the so wished for โNever againโ will someday be so.
_________________________________________________
Memory in Action
Survivors of the Shoah and their descendants in a trajectory of reconstruction
Children of the Shoah. To tell of what was lived, to include it in the chain of family descendance, to understand it according to the specific context, to look at it again, to put it into a new perspective and to learn from oneโs own experiences, all of this is what we are. the survivors of the Shoah (Holocaust) and their descendants have found to be since the very moment in which we began to meet. Additionally, we learned from each other and we went on reconstructing our pasts with new pieces that responded to obscure questions. We learned useful lessons for the present and for the future. We began to meet regularly in 1997. We told our stories, and with surprise, we discovered how very similar were so many things we had believed happened only to each one of us, and were, in fact, shared with the others.
We began as the โChildren of the Shoah,โ because almost all of us had been very little at the end of the war. Some, including myself, though born a bit after that, saw that our stories also had points in common. Those born after 1940 have almost no early memories and so their โmemoriesโ had to be investigated and reconstructed. Also, those of us who were born after the Shoah sought in our familiesโ past the links that we lacked to reconstruct the chain of connections to our parents and our grandparents. I often say that most important thing that happened to me in my life, happened before I was born. That โmost Important thingโ was that which unified us and what became an affectionate nest in which to find the keys that we lacked. We all had an intimate and personal relationship with the Shoah, and sharing it gave us a new sense of belonging. We felt like a family.
A Different Type of Institution. Clearly, we invented a way of doing things that was different from the usual procedures of local Jewish organizations. There was no difference between the Board of was Directors who thought about and made decisions and those who carried out what decided upon. Those of us who were members of the Board, were active in all other areas: we participated discussions, thought, signed checks about programs, and when it was necessary, took a broom and swept the floor. While we generated educational materials, we went down to open the door; while we invented innovative projects, we also made sure that there was no lack of coffee, tea, mate, sweetener and crackers. All volunteers, we all developed a very meaningful mission, we were in our home with our family.
Generations of the Shoah. In 2004, we set out on a great adventure, an international conference that we called โFacing the Future. In attendance were survivors, children, grandchildren, relatives, teachers, historians and cultural figures from several countries. This event strengthened our association. It was formalized and began to be known as the โGenerations of the Shoahโ in Argentina. โGenerationsโ was a very unusual in the context of local Jewish organization, because it mainly consisted of women. The men who accompanied us were amazed that we were able to be talking about four things at the same time, not only what had to be done, but also the health of each one of us, whose daughter was pregnant or which grandson had done well at school or had a high fever the previous night.
These were fertile meetings, with such a pleasant environment that it was enjoyable to be there. But we didnโt only create and distributed pedagogic materials, we also celebrated the holidays of our Jewish tradition, celebrated birthdays, gave support during unhappy events and were happy about our joys. . .we constituted an unexpected new affective web with close ties, perhaps a compensation for what some of us had lacked during our childhoods.
We learned from our parents and survivors to transform the tragedy into a motive for living. We created a philosophy that valued life and gave it meaning, in the organization as well as in our own lives, recounting, almost with joy, who we were and what we had learned.
We participated intensely in social networks, and we reacted strongly against the use of the Shoah for reasons that were not connected to it. Phrases like โNever again,โ โRemember so not to repeat,โ โFor the future generationsโ and so many others that we heard every day, brought us back again and again to explanations and demystifications. We permanently rectified false information. We fought against the banalization when Nazism, Hitler or Goebbels were mentioned as a common noun, which we took as an insult. We came out against statements that treated the facts lightly or superficially. We repudiated statements that distorted the facts, for they impeded making the making them known and the understanding of their content and scope. We protested against the spurious comparison of the Shoah with the politics of the State of Israel, pointing that what is now called Anti-Zionism is the same old Anti-Semitism in disguise.
We created three project that would go beyond what we had accomplished so far: the Cuadernos de la Shoรก (Notebooks of the Shoah) and Proyecto Aprendiz I y II (Project Aprendiz I and 2 (Project Apprendice I and II).
1. Cuadernos de la Shoรก. The Cuadernos are a publication directed at teachers who require an exhaustive pedagogical tool for teaching about the Holocaust. Each Cuaderno (there are now eight published and a nineth about to come out) deals with a specific theme: the rescuers, the children, the women, the resistance, the Shoah as part of the Second World War, the dehumanization, the outcomes, the genocides of the twentieth century. Each book is structured around three central concepts: the definition and explanation of the main ideas, the design of the book and graphic illustrations, the personal testimonies of survivors that transmit the human aspect of those involved.
To Live with Evil: Genocides of the Twentieth Century
2. โ Project Apprentice I. Project Apprentice I was developed to assure that each one of the living survivorโs stories continue to be told in an oral and face-to-face way. The living testimony permits interaction and questioning and brings directly to each listener the emotion of someone who lived through it all. The idea is to train young adults to tell in the future, the history of a specific survivor. During three months of direct contact, each Apprentice gets to know, accompanies, converses with the survivor. This conversation treats not only the survivorโs experiences during the Shoah, but also her childhood, her old age, her ideals, her joys, her sorrows. The Apprentice receives and incorporates that story into his or her life and commits to retell it in the coming decades. There are now 150 Apprentices who now have this responsibility.
Project Apprentice II
La superviviente Lea Zajac (izquierda) y su aprendiz Darรญo Berlinerblau (derecha), en Buenos Aires
To tell of what was lived, to include it in the chain of family descendance, to understand it according to the specific context, to look at it again, to put it into a new perspective and to learn from oneโs own experiences, all of this is what we are. the survivors of the Shoah (Holocaust) and their descendants have found to be since the very moment in which we began to meet. Additionally, we learned from each other and we went on reconstructing our pasts with new pieces that responded to obscure questions. We learned useful lessons for the present and for the future. We began to meet regularly in 1997. We told our stories, and with surprise, we discovered how very similar were so many things we had believed happened only to each one of us, and were, in fact, shared with the others.
3. Project Apprentice II. We created a second level to these activities. The Apprentices were trained to develop a short talk, up to twenty minutes in length, in which they described their experiences living along with a survivor and the ways in which their own lives were affected by it. Each talk was recorded on videos that were distributed through social media. These brief talks have a strong potential in education. After showing a video in a single class, there is time left to complement it with concepts, commentaries, questions and pedagogic activities that assure the understanding of what had been lived through.
The talks by these young adults have a strong effect on those who hear them. The anecdote, the living presence, the immediacy of emotion are exceptional vehicles for stimulating memory and not allowing things to be forgotten.
4. Museum of the Holocaust in Buenos Aires. In 2018, Generations of the Shoah became part of the Museum of the Holocaust in Buenos Aires, combining forces and voluntary work. We contributed who we are and what we knew, the materials we produced and the presentations to schools and universities. We learn and we teach.
We were in dialogue with different groups. We formed the Argentine chapter of the International Alliance for the Memory of the Holocaust. With training sessions, testimonies, and with our survivors, we supported the March for Life. We participate in the Latin American Network for the Teaching of the Shoah. We continue with the Cuadernos de la Shoรก and Proyecto Aprendiz. This activity is in the process of reformulation, given that with the passage of time, we can no longer count on survivors to take part. We will encounter the situation of the children of the survivors like us with our own experience of having grown up with the scars left in our parents and also our grandchildren, now freer from the direct connection with the survivors, with a renewed capacity for questioning, investigation and memory.
In synthesis. During the Battle of Britain, Sir Winston Churchill referred to those who fought, saying that โnever have so few done so much for so many.โ We are like that squadron of the RAF, a handful of people, with small voices that as the Children of the Shoah, Generations of the Shoah and now from the Museum, grow and become louder, become strong and powerful in their persistence to keep alive the memory of the Shoah, generate consciousness so that the so wished for โNever againโ will someday be so.
2013 โ โCon una piedra en el zapatoโ, novela testimonial. Escrita en 1996. Recibiรณ la Menciรณn de Honor en el Primer Concurso de Novela de la Editorial Acervo en 1998. Permaneciรณ inรฉdita hasta esta ediciรณn en e-book hecha por Amazon.
2012 โโDie versteckten Kinder: Aus dem Holocaust nach Buenos Airesโ, ediciรณn en alemรกn de โLos niรฑos escondidos: del Holocausto a Buenos Airesโ. La traducciรณn al alemรกn fue subsidiada por la Cancillerรญa argentina y el libro fue elegido como uno de los que representarรญa a la Argentina en la Feria del Libro de Frankfurt 2010.
2012. – โVolverโ, crรณnica de viaje escrita en 1995. La versiรณn en e-book es una ediciรณn de Bukium.
2008 โ El silencio de los aparecidos, re-ediciรณn, Editorial Generaciones de la Shoรก (ediciรณn actualizada y aumentada)
2007 โ โHijos de la Guerra. La segunda generaciรณn de la Shoรกโ, la continuaciรณn de la vida de los que vivieron, sus hijos y cรณmo fueron procesando el pasado de sus padres, cรณmo afectรณ sus vidas y quรฉ caminos les llevรณ a andar.
2012 | Ministerio de Justicia y DDHH: โLa Shoรก, los genocidios y crรญmenes de lesa humanidad: Enseรฑanzas para los juristasโ. Ponencia: โยฟPor quรฉ recordar la Shoรก en la Argentina?โ en la sesiรณn IV del simposio โLa polรญtica de la memoriaโ. pรกg. 144. Versiรณn en pdf
2007 | Eliahu Toker, Ana Weinstein: Nietos y abuelos. Un intenso vรญnculo. Ediciones Instituto Movilizador de Fondos Cooperativos. Buenos Aires. Caps: โAbuelas y frutillasโ, pรกg. 27 y โLa รบltima fronteraโ pรกg. 30
2004 | Nรฉlida Boulgourdjian-Toufeksian, Juan Carlos Toufeksian, Carlos Alemian (comp): Anรกlisis de la prรกcticas genocidas. Actas del IV Encuentro sobre Genocidio. Fundaciรณn Siranoush y Boghos Arzoumanian, Buenos Aires. Capรญtulo Genocidio y memoria: โLa segunda generaciรณn de sobrevivientes. Su lugar en el escenario del genocidioโ, pรกg.203
2004 | Ricardo Feierstein, Stephen Sadow (comps): Recreando la cultura judeoargentina 2. Literatura y artes plรกsticas. Editorial Mila, Buenos Aires. โVictimizaciรณn e identidad. Reflexiones serias a partir de textos humorรญsticosโ, pรกg 280
2002| Cristina Godoy (comp): Historiografรญa y Memoria colectiva. Tiempos y territorios. Miรฑo y Dรกvila, Buenos Aires. Cap:โEl mal y su legitimaciรณn socialโ, pรกg 91.
2002 | Ricardo Feierstein, Stephen Sadow (comps): Recreando la cultura judeoargentina. 1894-2001, en el umbral del segundo siglo. Editorial Mila, Buenos Aires. Cap: โLo judรญo en mi obraโ, pรกg. 311
Saรบl Yurkievich fue un poeta y crรญtico literario argentino. Naciรณ en 1931 de una familia de inmigrantes judรญos en La Plata, donde se educรณ y comenzรณ su carrera acadรฉmica. En la dรฉcada de 1950 se uniรณ al movimiento de vanguardia en Buenos Aires. La carrera de Yurkievich comenzรณ como erudito y crรญtico de la literatura latinoamericana. Su primer trabajo publicado, Valoraciรณn de Vallejo (1958), lo convirtiรณ en uno de los eruditos mรกs rigurosos de la poesรญa de Vallejo y de la literatura latinoamericana en general. Tres aรฑos despuรฉs, Yurkievich publicรณ su primera colecciรณn de poesรญa Volanda Linde Lumbre (1961). La mayor parte del trabajo de Yurkievich fue escrito en Francia, donde viviรณ desde 1968 trabajando como profesor de literatura latinoamericana en la Universidad de Parรญs VIII (Vincennes). En Parรญs mantuvo una fuerte amistad y vรญnculos literarios con escritores como Julio Cortรกzar, quien mรกs tarde lo nombrรณ su ejecutor literario. Yurkievich impartiรณ cursos y seminarios sobre literatura latinoamericana en varias universidades estadounidenses, incluidas Harvard, Chicago, Columbia, Johns Hopkins, UCLA, Maryland y Pittsburgh. Autor de una notable producciรณn poรฉtica basada en el experimentalismo de la dรฉcada de 1960, Yurkievich es conocido sobre todo por su vasta, lรบcida y esclarecedora obra crรญtica, que lo convirtiรณ en uno de los crรญticos literarios mรกs conocidos del mundo de habla hispana.
Saรบl Yurkievich was an Argentine poet and literary critic. He was born in 1931 in a Jewish immigrant family in La Plata, where he was educated and began his academic career. In the 1950s he joined the avant-garde movement in Buenos Aires. Yurkievich career started as a scholar and critic of Latin American literature. His first published work, Valoraciรณn de Vallejo (1958), made him one of the most rigorous scholars of Vallejoโs poetry, and of Latin American literature in general. Three years later, Yurkievich published his first poetry collection Volanda Linde Lumbre (1961). Most of Yurkievichโs work was written in France, where he lived since 1968 working as professor of Latin American literature at the Universitรฉ de Paris VIII (Vincennes). In Paris he maintained strong friendship and literary ties with writers such as Julio Cortรกzar, who later named him his literary executor. Yurkievich taught courses and seminars on Latin American literature in several American universities including Harvard, Chicago, Columbia, Johns Hopkins, UCLA, Maryland, and Pittsburgh. Author of a remarkable poetic production rooted in the experimentalism of the 1960s, Yurkievich is mostly renowned for his vast, lucid, and elucidating critical oeuvre, which turned him in one of the best known literary critics in the Spanish-speaking world.
De inquirir con ahรญnco por la primera causa, otros pueblos hubieron concebido de un dios รบnico, un supremo hacedor omnipresente y omnipotente. Pero el deseo de personificarlo y venerarlo por imagen primรณ en su รกnimo. Algunos reivindicaron un principio primordial, como el fuego de los mazdeรญstas que es el agni de los arios, y coaligaron esta energรญa originaria con deidades corpรณreas. Aunque capaces de variadas metamorfosis, ellos adaptaron aspectos identificables y las adoraron en efigie. Adoraron una diversidad encarados y en cada uno reconocieron poderes particulares.
Sรณlo esa grey que viviรณ la expulsiรณn y el รฉxodo, esa desterrada estirpe que conociรณ la desnuda aridez del desierto, que hollรณ la innumerable y movediza arena, descreyรณ de los dioses inferiores reverenciados por los reinos vecinos. Consagrรณ la majestad de un solo Dios verdadero, causante absoluto de cuanto hubo, existe y serรก.
El Plasmador, ese omnipresente, omnรญmodo, engendra con su verbo el mundo y sobre รฉl y por siempre se enseรฑorea. Por obra de su palabra, a partir del tenebroso, del ominoso desorden, separa el dรญa de la noche, aparta de las tierras mojadas las secas, hace aparecer y proliferar las plantas y los animales y, conformรกndolo a su semejanza, genera al hombre. Bien sabe el versado reb Schapse de dรณnde es oriunda y cรณmo se origina la humana progenie y cuรกl es el pacto que la liga al Adonai, a los dichos de su boca, a su doctrina que como lluvia gotea, al rocรญo de su razonamiento.
Inaccesible, innominable, incognoscible, este Altรญsimo rebasa toda humana capacidad. Su ilimitada perfecciรณn, su inabarcable dominio no son figurables, exceden cualquier forma de representaciรณn. Vedada toda idolatrรญa, tanta potestad desprovista de imagen requiere de sus fieles una ardua comprensiรณn. (Tambiรฉn esto lo sabe reb Schapse). Su simultรกnea infinitud escapa al limitativo y sucesivo lenguaje. Su intrรญnseca y transcendental entidad sobrepasa a todo lo que El causa, a cuanto de El se desprende. Pero a la par el Eterno es el Verbo revelado a los hombres por medio del Libro, fuente y modelo de todo discurso. Puesto que el Dios que se manifiesta es el Dios que se expresaโAquel que al pronunciar evidencia–, dado que su palabra estรก trasladada a la Sagrada Escritura, transpuesta en sรญmbolos, ella equivale a su Creaciรณn y en ella su saber se cifra. Transmitido por un arco de letras a sus elegidos, es menester que รฉstos interroguen y interpreten con constancia el Libro a fin de penetrar en sus mรกs arcanos sentidos. Deben internarse por uno de sus innรบmeros pasajes e ir โcomo va ahora reb Schapse โadentrรกndose, por progresiva dilucidaciรณn de sus claves, en ese saber que tanto escatima su anhelada claridad.
De tal modo reflexiona nuestro inquieto, nuestro reverente reb Schapse. Tales preceptos, tales prevenciones repite, se repite este insatisfecho, este estremecido indagador mientras lee a la oscilante de un pabilo. Balanceรกndose al ritmo de su quejumbroso canturreo, a la par que masculla, que masca las sรญlabas, lee y medita sobre esos versรญculos de Ezequiel en que Dios le da su palabra por la boca, le ordena abrir la boca y comerla, deposita sobre su mano un rollo de endechas y le hace comer aquel rollo, henchir con รฉl su vientre y digerirlo. Se hamaca musitado reb Schapse en la inconmensurabilidad de la noche, en ese su sucucho, sentado ante el ilimitado, el incesante, el permutable
Libro de los libros, y rodeado de su descendencia, de comentarios que intentan desentraรฑarlo y los tratados que recapacitan acerca de sus mandamientos. El รnclito, el Incognoscibleโcolige reb Schapseโincita a sus elegidos a la interrogaciรณn de los textos, a escrutarlos, a clarificarlos, a la especulativa justificaciรณn de la ley. Ellos buscan su salud en la exรฉgesis, tanto que tienen ineludible carรกcter de predestinaciรณn. Por eso, concorde con su piadosa conciencia, se considera autorizado y hasta compulsado a indagar en los textos todo lo cuestionable, a extremar su demanda de dilucidaciรณn, ยฟQuรฉ lรญmite impone a su saber un libro infinito, inagotable, en cuyo entendimiento reside la salvaguarda de sus lectores?
Asรญ cavilando, amparado por la escritura donde su mente mora mรกs que su cuerpo sobre la tierra, durante esa larga noche en vela, cuando el velorio se entenebrece y calla con el mundo, reb Schapse osa formular las preguntas, vuelve a plantearse los enigmas. Su inherente supremacรญaโse dice–, su condiciรณn de ser casual sobrepasa todo lo que El se desprende. Si el verbo y el mundo son una obra, no son Dios sino sus emanaciones, recipientes o instrumentos de su voluntad. Mundo y palabra, por su imperfecciรณn, solo en parte pueden ser Dios, la palabra que precede al mundo. Es mรกs Dios que รฉste, o el mundo que la involucra es mรกs Dios que ella. O palabra o mundo extremando el argumento, resultan opรณsitos de Dios. Por lo menos, parcialmente. La palabra de Dios gesta al mundo, pero el hombre, dotado por Dios de palabra, sรณlo alcanza con ella a remedar el mundo. ยฟO consigue el hombre, por intermedio de la palabra dotar a la suya de facultad genรฉsica?
Acuciado reb Schapse por su sed de saber, no puede dejar de plantearse el arduo dilema de la similitud con Dios. ยฟCรณmo Dios, que no es susceptible de representaciรณnโdemanda reb Schapse–, pudo configurar el hombre a su imagen? La humana apariencia sรณlo resulta concebible en tanto reflejo de alguno de los atributos divinos. No todos poseen igual importancia. Por eso se impulso el establecimiento una jerarquรญa entre las propiedades o poderes de Jehovรก. Asรญ fue estatuido el orden de sus diez resplandores, diez nombres que aluden a lo indecible, diez coronas o espejos de Dios. Reb Schapse sabe que, ascendiendo por sus excelencias, su majestad es menos que capacidad, su capacidad es menos que su inteligencia, su inteligencia es menos que su sabidurรญa, su sabidurรญa es menos que su supremacรญa. Desleรญda copia, el hombre guarda pizcas, migajas virtuales de algunos de esos atributos que en escasa medida le fueron conferidos, los conserva como simiente sujeta tanto al germinaciรณn como a la corrupciรณn.
Con desosiego, temeroso de toda transgresiรณn, reb Schapse desemboca ineludiblemente en el insoluble problema del mal. ยฟCรณmo no procurar que se transparente lo velado, que se disipen las incรณgnitas relativas a la impureza o deficiencia del hombre y la imperfecciรณn o inconclusiรณn del mundo? ยฟPor quรฉ se retira Dios de su eternidad para crear algo separado de su plenitud? Porque no soportaโarriesga reb Schapseโsu henchimiento y necesita, por su propia salud, desprenderse de una no equiparable hechura, o porque no le basta su inmanencia y su ser en sรญ requiere trascender por intermedio de una defectuosa creaciรณn. ยฟRepresenta la Creaciรณn una ruptura catastrรณfica de la unidad? No puede reb Schapseโso pena de irreverencia o de extralimitaciรณnโpensar en la incapacidad aunque parciales o involuntarias de Dios. Presumirlo constituirรญa un pecado contra la infalibilidad divina. No puede argรผirque Dios crea milagrosamente el mundo pero no lo domina, que esa gรฉnisis no coincide completamente con su designio. No puede considerar que hay aspectos o advenimientos que Dios no alcanza a comprender cabalmente. No puede juzgar que se producen resultados imprevistos, azares no vislumbrados, efectos monstruosos. Si su grandeza iguala su rigor, no puede reb Schapse aventurar que sus manifestaciones no resultan siempre benรฉficas, que algunos dimanan de su benevolencia y otras de su cรณlera. Aunque el peligro de desafรญo o desacato lo aterre, debe reb Schapse tener en cuenta la interpretaciรณn de otros exรฉgetas. Una de ellas conjetura que es tanta la indulgencia de Dios como su fastidio; otra, que su responsabilidad puede considerarse limitada, generando un mundo. Su destino queda librado a su propio encaminamiento. Lo discordante con respecto a la dignidad de Dios, obrarรญa fuera del mandato divino. Asรญ el hombre, abandonado a su รญndole, se convierte en lo que le dicta su ser. Desde que expulsado de edรฉn, actรบa segรบn sus dispares tendencias, procede confusamente, coartado por el deforme mundo terrenal. Por el cuerpo y alma se ligan desproporcionadamente, estรกn a la defensa temiendo que cualquiera de ambos consuma el otro.
Sin quererlo, reb Schapse se interna en el dรฉdalo de las dilucidaciones que divergen, se interceptan e intrincan. Presas de una pujanza prรณxima a la ebriedad, ellas proliferan por propia impulsiรณn. Obsesivamente, el tan piadoso como ansioso reb avecinarse el extravรญo, aunque descarte la tentaciรณn de gematrรญa. No admite el principio de la exรฉgesis libre. No se permite abusar para que condescienda por los propensiones personales del intรฉrprete, no se autoriza a endilgarle su delirio รญntimo. Pero cรณmo escapar de un dualismo de un Dios que se contrarรญa, un Dios en discordia, enfrentado al mundo maligno, confrontando a su engendramiento. No quiere reb Schapse poner barreras al esclarecimiento de la escritura, protegerse bajo una timorata ignorancia para no desviarse de la prescripta doctrina. Si se dice que la mente vuela en su virtuoso ascenso hacia el claror, ยฟcรณmo coartarle el remonte?, en aras de cuรกl oscura redenciรณn? ยฟPor quรฉ–alega reb Schapseโparapetarla, a la defensiva, en una doctrina confinada como recinto fortificado? La fuente surge y no surge en medio del aura la letra emite, el Dios que se oculta instiga a su bรบsqueda. Aunque tan sutil sea, aunque tan delicada como compleja la relaciรณn entre creer, inquirir y durar, ยฟcuรกl humana inteligencia puede impedir a su semejante el mejor entendimiento de los arcanos? Reb Schapse no tolera que se circunscriba, tal como el consistorio lo dictamina, la libertad de interpretaciรณn รบnicamente a las versiones que persigan el conocimiento de la condiciรณn humana a partir de la caรญda. Esos probos tienen por saludable sรณlo la sapiencia que conduzca al reintegro redentor. Proscriben toda especulaciรณn acerca de lo que se sitรบa por encima o por debajo del alcance divino. Nadie, segรบn estos guรญas, debe especular sobre lo que estuviera antes o despuรฉs de todos los tiempos. Pero no ceja reb Schapse en su bรบsqueda, en el recogimiento de la inconmensurable noche, cuando titilan los astros para que presintamos, para que atisbemos la magnitud que separa lo รญntimo de lo infinito, aunque la distancia lo amilane, no cede al antema de los ortodoxos, aunque lo acusen por descarrรญo, o lo que es peor, como acostumbran ahora. Lo tildan de alucinado y lo excluyan, cual pestรญfero, por insania.
To inquire with dedication for the first cause, other peoples may have conceived of a unique god, a supreme creator, omnipresent and omnipotent. Be the desire to personify it or venerate it took first place in their spirit. Some vindicated a primordial principal, such as the fire of the mazdeists, that is the fire god of the Arians, and unite this original energy with corporal deities. Although capable of wide-ranging metamorphosis, they adopted identifiable aspects and adored them in effigy. They adored an attractive diversity and in each one the recognized particular powers.
Only that flock that lived through expulsion and exodus, that exiled stock that knew the naked aridness of the desert, that left tracks in the innumerable and moving sand, didnโt believe in the inferior gods revered by neighboring kingdoms. It consecrated the majesty of a single true god, absolute cause of everything there was, exists and will be.
The Creator, that omnipresent, omni mode, engendered with his word the world and over it and forever dominates. The work of his word, starting from the darkness, from the ominous disorder, separates the from the night, divides the wet lands from the dry, makes plants and animals appear and proliferate and forming him in his image, he creates man. The well-versed Reb Schapse knows well few where he comes from and the origin of the human progeny and what is the pact that ties it to Adonai, to the sayings of his mouth, to his doctrine as to how the rain falls, to the dew of his reasoning.
Inaccessible, unnamable, unknowable, this Most High overruns all human capacity. His unlimited perfection, his interminable dominion is not describable, they exceed any form of representation. Forbidden all idolatry, such a power devoid of imagery requires of his of his faithful an arduous understanding (Reb Schapse all knew that.) His simultaneous infinity escapes the limiting and successive language. His intrinsic and transcendental being goes beyond all that he causes, how much of Him is emitted that makes clear that God is expressing himself–The One that on pronouncing evidence–, given that his word is transferred to the Sacred Writings, transposed in symbols, that it is equivalent to his Creation and in it his wisdom is hidden. Transmitted by a rainbow of letters to his chosen ones, it is required that they question and interpret the Book with determination with the intention of penetrating its most arcane meanings. They should get into it through one of its innumerable passages and goโas Reb Schapse goes nowโputting himself deeper into it, through progressive elucidation of its keys, into that knowledge that so sparing in its yearned for clarity.
In such a way reflects our inquisitive, our reverent Reb Schapse. Such precepts, such precautions, this unsatisfied one repeats, repeats to himself, this agitated investigator, while he reads by the oscillating of a wick. Rocking to the rhythm of his plaintive soft singing, at the same time that he mumbles, that he mutters the syllables, reads and meditates over those verses from Ezequiel in which God his him his word by mouth, he orders him to open his mouth and it, he deposits onto his hand a roll of dirges, to swell his abdomen with it and digest it. Book of Books, and surrounded by its progeny, of commentaries that intend to unravel it and the treatises the reconsider its commandments. The illustrious, the unknowableโReb Schapse concludesโincites he chosen ones to the interrogation of the texts, to scrutinize them, to clarify them, to the explicative justification of the law. They seek their health in exegesis, as they have the inevitable aspect of predestination. For that reason, he that reason, in concordance with his pious conscience, he considered himself authorized and even compelled to inquire into everything questionable, to maximize his demand for elucidation, what limit to imposing his knowledge on an infinite book, inexhaustible, in whose understanding resides the safeguard of its readers?
Meditating in this way, sheltered by the writings where is mind dwells more than his body over the Earth, during that large sleepless night, when the vigil darkens and quiets the world, Reb Schapse dares to formulate his questions, once again contemplate the enigmas. His inherent supremacy– as it is calledโhis condition of being easily surpasses everything that He exudes. If the word and the world are one and the same work, they are not God but his emanations, his containers or instruments of his will. World and word, for their imperfection, could only in part be God. The word that precedes the world. God is more than this, or the world that involves them is more God that it. Word or world, taking the argument to its extreme, turn out to be opposites of God. At least, partially. The word of God conceived the world, but man, given the word by God, only achieves imitating the world with it. Or does man obtain, by means of the word, the ability to give to himself the power of creation?
Driven by his thirst for knowledge, Reb Schapse canโt stop contemplating the arduous dilemma of the resemblance with God. How could God, who not capable of representationโReb Schapse demands–, configure man In His own image? Human appearance only can be conceived as a reflection of one of the divine attributes. All of them do not possess equal importance. For that reason, the establishment of a hierarchy among the properties pr powers of Jehovah was inspired. And so, the order of His ten radiances, ten names that allude to the unsayable, ten crowns or mirrors of God was established. Reb Schapse knows that, ascending through His excellences, His majesty is less than his capacity, His intelligence is less than his wisdom, His wisdom is less than his supremacy. A diluted copy., man saves bits, virtual crumbs of some of those attributes that in a small measure were conferred on him, he conserves as seed subject as much by germination as by corruption.
With discomfort, fearful of any transgression, Reb Schapse flowed inevitably into the unsolvable problem of evil. How not it possible that the hidden become transparent, that the unknown relative to manโs impurity or deficiency and the imperfection or incompleteness of the world go away? Why did God leave his eternity to create something separated from his plenitude? Why doesnโt he promote His extension and need for His own health, and get rid of one incomparable bit of workmanship, or why isnโt His own eminence enough for him, and does His being itself require the transcendence by intervention of a defective creation? Does the Creation represent a catastrophic rupture of the unity. Reb Schapse cannotโunder penalty of irreverence or abuseโthink about the incapacity even partial or involuntary of God? To presume that would constitute a sin against divine infallibility. He canโt argue that God creates the world miraculously but doesnโt dominate it, that that genesis doesnโt completely coincide with his design. He canโt consider that there are aspects of advents that God doesnโt come to fully understand. He canโt conclude that unexpected results occur, chances unforeseen, monstruous effects. If His greatness equals his rigor, Reb Schapse canโt venture that His manifestations always are beneficent, that some emanate from his benevolence and others from his anger Although the danger of challenging or disrespecting terrifies him, Reb Schapse ought to take into account the interpretation of other exegetes, One of them conjectures that as much the indulgence of God as his disgust; another that His responsibility could be considered to be limited, generating a world, its destiny then freed from its projected route. Incongruous with respect to the dignity of God, it would work outside of the divine mandate. So, man, abandoned to his nature, would become in whatever his being tells him to be. Since he was expelled from Eden, he acts accordant to disparate tendencies, he proceeds in a confused manner, controlled by the deformed Earthly world. Because the body and soul are connected disproportionately, they are on the defensive, fearing that one of the two will consume the other.
Without wishing to do so, Reb Schapse got into the tangle of elucidations that diverge, intercept each other and confound. Prisoners of a force close to intoxication, they proliferated by their own impulsion. Obsessively, the equally pious and anxious Reb approached the misconduct, although he rejected the temptation of Gematria. He doesnโt admit free exegesis. He doesnโt permit himself an abuse that allows for personal propensions by the interpreter, he doesnโt authorize the wrongful addition of his intimate delirium. But how to escape a dualism in which a God contradicts himself, a God in a state of discord, confronting a malignant world, confronting its engendering. Reb Schapse Doesnโt want to put up barriers to the clarification of the writing, protecting It under a timorous ignorance to so as not to diverge from the prescriptive doctrine. If itโs said that the mind flies in virtuous ascent toward clarity, how to limit his climb, for the sake of which obscure redemption? Whyโalleges Reb Schapseโhide it, defensively in a doctrine confined like a fortified enclosure? The source surges, and it doesnโt surge in the middle of the aura the letter emits, the God who hides himself, instigates the search for him. Although as subtle as it may be, although as delicate as complex the relationship among believing, enquiring and existing, what human intelligence can impede his fellow man the best understanding of the mysteries? Reb Schapse doesnโt tolerate que one circumscribes, as the accepted belief dictates, the freedom of interpretation only to those versions that pursue the knowledge of the human condition, starting from the fall. From these investigations, the only findings that are beneficial are those that lead to the redemptive reintegration. They prohibit all speculation about what is situated above or below the divine reach, Nobody, according to these guides, ought to speculate what there was before or after all time. But Reb Schapse doesnโt stop in his search, in the retreat of the incommensurable night, when the stars flicker so that we sense, that we observe, the magnitude that separates the intimate from the infinite, although the distance frightens, it doesnโt cede against the anathema of the orthodox, although they accuse him of having lost his way, or what is worse, as they as accustomed to do now. The label him as delusional, and they exclude him, as pestilential, for insanity.
Edgardo Cozarinsky naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1939. Estudiรณ literatura en la Universidad de Buenos Aires. Tenรญa veinte aรฑos cuando conociรณ a Silvina Ocampo, Adolfo Bioy Casares y, a travรฉs de ellos, a Borges, escritores que frecuentรณ durante sus aรฑos de vida en Buenos Aires. En 1973 ganรณ un premio literario, compartido con Josรฉ Bianco, con un ensayo sobre el chisme como procedimiento narrativo en Proust y James. En 1974 publicรณ Borges y el cine. Ese mismo aรฑo dejรณ Buenos Aires y se fue a Parรญs. Allรญ se dedicรณ principalmente al cine, el tรญtulo mรกs representativo de esta tendencia es La Guerre d’un seul homme (1981), confrontaciรณn entre los diario de Ernst Jรผnger durante la ocupaciรณn alemana en Francia y los noticieros franceses de propaganda del mismo perรญodo. Durante el resto de los aรฑos 70 y 80 su obra literaria estuvo postergada. Sin embargo, el รบnico libro que publicรณ en esos aรฑos – Vudรบ urbano (1985) – se convirtiรณ en un รฉxito. En 1999 Cozarinsky pasรณ un mes en un hospital de Parรญs allรญ escribiรณ los dos primeros cuentos de su libro premiado, La novia de Odessa. A partir de ese momento tambiรฉn empezรณ a pasar casi todo el tiempo en Buenos Aires con breves estadรญas en Europa.
Edgardo Cozarinsky was born in Buenos Aires in 1939. He studied literature at the University of Buenos Aires. He was twenty years old when he met Silvina Ocampo, Adolfo Bioy Casares and, through them, Borges, writers whom he frequented during his years of life in Buenos Aires. In 1973 he won a literary award, shared with Josรฉ Bianco, with an essay on gossip as a narrative procedure in Proust and James. In 1974 he published Borges y el cine. That same year he left Buenos Aires and went to Paris. There he devoted himself mainly to cinema, the most representative title of this trend is La Guerre d’un seul homme (1981), a confrontation between Ernst Jรผnger’s diary during the German occupation of France and the French propaganda news from the same period. During the rest of the 70s and 80s his literary work was postponed. However, the only book he published in those years – Urban Voodoo (1985) – became a success. In 1999 Cozarinsky spent a month in a Paris hospital where he wrote the first two stories for his award-winning book, The Bride from Odessa. From that moment he also began to spend almost all his time in Buenos Aires with brief stays in Europe.
El atardecer del dรญa siguiente los encontrรณ sentados en un banco, bajo las acacias del parque Tchevchenco. El rumor de la ciudad les llegaba apaciguando y a lo lejos podรญan entrever el mar y los barcos, promesa indefinida que cada uno de ellos entendรญa a su manera.
Ella le confesรณ que era huรฉrfana, que estudiando las revistas francesas de donde Madame Yvonne copiaba sus modelos habรญa aprendido que la vida es la misma en Parรญs, en Viena o en Odessa, que sin dinero sรณlo se puede ser sirvienta, y que el mundo se divide entre los que tienen y los que no tienen. รl le explicรณ que eso es cierto en Europa pero del otro lado del ocรฉano hay una tierra de pura posibilidad, un paรญs joven donde un judรญo como รฉl puede poseer un pedazo de tierra. Atropelladamente, le hablรณ del barรณn Hirsch, de la colonizaciรณn, de Santa Fe, de Entre Rรญos. Ella oyรณ, por primera vez, cosas cuya existencia habรญa ignorado, que un judรญo podรญa querer cultivar la tierra, que podรญa temer a los cristianos como ella temรญa a los judรญos del taller, que podรญa hablarle a ella de otra cosa que del regalo que le harรญa si consintiera en acompaรฑarlo una noche a cierto hotelucho de la plaza Privakzalnaia.
ยฟFue durante ese segundo encuentro cuando รฉl le revelรณ el modo de la tristeza, en apariencia inexplicable, que lo dominaba en vรญsperas de cruzar el Atlรกntico hacia una nueva vida? Ese motivo tenรญa nombre: Rifka Bronfman.
Sus familias los habรญan presentado cuando cumplieron catorce aรฑos, ya los habรญan prometido antes de se conocieran y los habรญan casado cinco dรญas antes de รฉl dejara Kiev. Se habรญan visto a solas no mรกs de diez veces antes de la boda, y siempre con padres o hermanos en el cuarto de al lado o en la ventana que supervisaba el magro jardรญn entre la casa y la calle.
Hacia un aรฑo que Daniel habรญa empezado a jugar con la idea de emigrar. La delegaciรณn de la Argentina para la Colonizaciรณn Judรญa, de paso por Kiev, habรญa organizado reuniones vespertinas en la Asociaciรณn Mutual Israelita, donde un conferencista elocuente, con la ayuda de una linterna mรกgica y una docena de placas de vidrio, les habรญa mostrado los campos fรฉrtiles, interminables que los esperaban en la Argentina. En un mapa habรญa seรฑalado la ubicaciรณn de esas tierras y su distancia de las metrรณpolis: Buenos Aires y Rosario, que otras placas les habรญan descubierto. Tambiรฉn habรญa agitado en la mano un delgado volumen encuadernado en color celeste y blanco sobre cuya tapaโhabรญa explicadoโestaba impreso (en espaรฑol, por lo tanto en caracteres latinos) โConstituciรณn de la Repรบblica Argentinaโ; de ese volumen les habรญa leรญdo, traduciendo inmediatamente al idish, los artรญculos que prometรญan igualdad y libertad de cultos para todos quienes quisieran trabajar esa โtierra de pazโ.
Estas palabras Daniel las habรญa repetido a Rifka, esas imรกgenes se las habรญa descrito detalladamente. Su prometida no compartรญa tanto entusiasmo. Aceptรณ seguirlo, acatando el precepto segรบn el cual el lugar de la mujer estรก al lado del marido, pero ese mundo nuevo no la hacรญa soรฑar. Cuando รฉl llenรณ los papeles necesarios, no expresรณ ningรบn reparo particular, pero cuando volvieron aprobados y sellados por el consulado argentino, y leyรณ en ellos su nombre, su fecha de nacimiento, el color de su pelo y el de sus ojos, prorrumpiรณ en sollozos vehementes, renovados cada vez que el cansancio prometรญa extinguirlos. Las familias creyeron que se trataba de un estado de agitaciรณn provocado por las vรญsperas del casamiento; un primo, que habรญa hecho vagos estudios de medicina, declarรณ que se trataba de una afecciรณn a la moda, llamada neurastenia. Vagamente halagada por ese diagnรณstico, Rifka enfrentรณ dignamente la ceremonia en la sinagoga, bajo la peluca ritual que cubrรญa su crรกneo reciรฉn afeitado.
Esa noche, Daniel debiรณ vencer su inexperiencia y ella su miedo. Descubrieron, en medio de la sangre, รฉl el placer, ella el dolor. A la maรฑana siguiente, รฉl despertรณ solo en medio de las sรกbanas manchadas; de lejos le llegaban gritos, llanto, reproches, quejas. Encontrรณ a Rifka en brazos de su suegra, cuyo consuelo rehusaba. Mientras la seรฑora repetรญa incesantemente โSe le va a pasar, se le va a pasarโ, tratando de cubrir la voz de la joven esposa, รฉsta lograba oรญr no menos incesantemente y cada vez mรกs fuerte: โNo voy, no voy, no voyโ. Cuando Rifka recobrรณ cierta serenidad, pudo unir algunas palabras, formar frases.
–Tengo miedo, mucho miedo. Aquรญ conozco a todos, aquรญ estรก mi familia, tu familia, mis amigas; estรก la sinagoga, el mercado, todo lo que conozco. ยฟCon quรฉ nos vamos a encontrar allรก? ยฟVรญboras? ยฟIndios? ยฟPlantas carnรญvoras?
Daniel intentaba explicarle que ahora ella tenรญa un marido para protegerla, pero Rifka parecรญa impermeable a todo argumento. Cuando logrรณ secar sus lรกgrimas, aceptรณ, junto con un vaso de tรฉ con limรณn, la sugestiรณn, nada optimista, casi desesperada, de su madre; viajar un aรฑo mรกs tarde, tal vez sรณlo seis meses, cuando รฉl hubiese escrito confirmรกndole que ella estarรญa a salvo de tantos peligros con que las novelas de Emilio Salgari la habรญan amenazado.
Daniel no la tocรณ en las noches siguientes, que precedieron su viaje. Rifka, tal vez aliviada, no se lo reprochรณ.
La muchacha lo habรญa escuchado el silencio. Del parque han caminado lentamente en direcciรณn al escenario de su primer encuentro. El cielo rosado del crepรบsculo ha cedido gradualmente a un azul cada vez mรกs profundo. Ya es de noche cuando รฉl termina su relato, abrupto, desordenado, que los pรกrrafos anteriores intentan resumir.
Pasan ante cafรฉs y pastelerรญas con nombres franceses e italianos, donde no pueden permitirse entrar, y tras la cortina de encajes de una ventana, ella reconoce las flores de trapo, el pรกjaro embalsamado y remendado y cintas de sed de un sombrero que vio armar, pieza por pieza, y ahora corona un cabeza invisible. Llegan a la estatua del duque francรฉs cuyo nombre no les dice nada; pรกlidamente, intermitentemente, la ilumina el resplandor del hotel de Londres. A lo lejos, los barcos anclados en el puerto tambiรฉn conceden algรบn reflejo al tierra negra, susurrante.
Cuando ella no es para comentar el relato que ha escuchado con atenciรณn.
–ยฟCuรกndo te embarcas?
–Maรฑana. El barco parte a las seis de la tarde pero los pasajeros de tercera clase deben estar a bordo antes de mediodรญa.
Ella lo mira, esperando palabras que no llegan. Tras un instante, insiste.
–ยฟVas a viajar solo?
รl la mira, entendiendo y sin atreverse a creer en lo que entiende.
–Solo. . . Que remedio tengo. . .
Ella lo tomas por los brazos con fuerza, plantada ante รฉl.
Daniel siente que esas manos pequeรฑas pueden apretar y tal vez golpear, que no estรกn hechas para sostener solamente una aguja.
–ยกMe llevas contigo! ยกYo soy casi rubia, tengo ojos claros si no celestes, mido poco menos de un metro sesenta y cinco y tengo dieciocho aรฑos! ยฟAcaso hay una fotografรญa en el salvoconducto?
–Pero. . .โรฉl atina a balbucirโno estamos casados. . .
La carcajada de ella resuena en la plaza desierta, parece rodar por la escalinata y despertar un echo en el puerto.
–ยฟCรณmo podrรญamos estar casados si yo soy ortodoxa y tรบ judรญo. Necesitarรญamos meses para que un rabino aceptase mi conversiรณn. . . Ademรกs, ยฟno dices que en este paรญs nuevo no importa nada de todo lo que aquรญ nos esclaviza? Letโs go!โ ยกVamos!
Ante la mirada estupefacta de Daniel, ella empieza a girar sobre sรญ misma, con brazos extendidos, como un derviche de Anatolia. Sin dejar de reรญr, repite como una invocaciรณn los nombres que ha oรญdo mencionar hace un momento por primera vez.
–ยกBuenos Aires! ยกRosario! ยกEntre Rรญos! ยกSanta Fe! ยกArgentina! Se rรญe cada vez mรกs fuerte y no deja de girar.
–Yo soy Rifka Bronfman!
_________________________________________
The Fiancรฉe from Odessa
โ excerpts from the story
Sunset, the next day, found them seated in a bench under the acacias of Tchevchenco Park. The noise of the city came muted to them and at a distance they could make out the sea and the ships, an indefinite that each of the understood in their own way.
Was it during that second meeting that when he revealed to her the manner of his sadness, inexplicable in its appearance, that dominated him on the eve of crossing the Atlantic to a new life? That reason had a name: Rifka Bronfman.
Their families had introduced them when they turned fourteen, they had already been engaged before they knew each other and they had had them marry five days before he was to leave Kiev. They had seen each other alone no more than ten times before the wedding, and always with parents or brothers in the room next door or in the window that oversaw the meager garden between the house and the street.
It had been a year since Daniel had begun to play with the idea of emigrating. The delegation of from Argentina for Jewish Colonization, passing through Kiev, had organized evening meetings at the Jewish Mutual Association, where an eloquent speaker, with the help of a magic lantern and a dozen of glass slides, had shown them the interminable fertile fields that await them in Argentina. On a map, he had pointed out the location of those lands and their distance from the metropolises: Buenos Aires Y Rosario, that other slides had discovered for them. He had also shaken in his hand a thin volume, bound in light blue and white whose cover–he explainedโwas printed (n Spanish, and so in Latin letters) โConstitution of the Argentine Republic.โ From that volume, he had read to them, immediately translating into Yiddish, the articles that promised equality and freedom of religion for all who wish to work that โland of peace.โ
Daniel had repeated these words to Rifka, those images that had been described to them in detail. His fiancรฉ didnโt share such enthusiasm. She accepted that that she had to follow him, obeying the precept according to which the place of the wife is at the side of her husband, but this new world didnโt make her dream. When he filled out the necessary papers, she didnโt express any particular objection, but when they returned approved and stamped by the Argentine consul, and she read in them her name, her date of birth, the color of her hair and of her eyes, she broke out in vehement sighing, renewed every time that tiredness promised to extinguish them. The families believed that it was a state of nervous agitation, provoked by the eve of the wedding; a cousin, he had done some vague studies in medicine, declared that is was an affliction that was in fashion, called neurasthenia. Vaguely flattered by that diagnosis, Rifka faced the ceremony in a dignified way, under that ritual wig that covered her recently shaved cranium.
That night Daniel had to conquer his inexperience and she her fear. They discovered, in the midst of the blood, he, pleasure and she, pain. The next morning, he awoke alone in the middle of the stained sheets; from a distanced came yelling, crying, reproaches, complaints. He found Rifka in the arms of his mother-in-law, whose solace she refused. While the lady repeated incessantly โIt will pass, it will pass,โ trying to cover the voice of the young bride; just as incessantly, she didnโt hear, and each time more strongly: โIโm not going, Iโm not going, Iโm not going.โ When Rifka recovered a certain serenity, she could put together a few words, form phrases.
โI am afraid, very much afraid. Here, I know everyone, my family is here, my friends, the market, everything I know. What is going to find us there? Snakes? Indians? Carnivorous plants?โโ
Daniel tried to explain to her that now she had a husband who would protect her, but Rifka seemed impervious to any argument. When she was able to dry her tears, she accepted, together with a glass of tea with lemon, her motherโs suggestion, in no way optimistic, almost desperate: to travel a year later, perhaps only six month, when he had written, confirming to her that she would be safe from so many dangers with which the novels of Emilio Salgari had threatened her.
The following nights, Daniel didnโt touch her during the following nights that preceded his voyage. Rifka, perhaps relieved did not reproach him.
_______________________________________________
The girl had listened to him in silence. From the park, they have walked slowly in the direction of the scene of their first meeting. The rosy sky of sunset had gradually ceded to a blue more and more deep. It is already night when he finishes his story, abrupt, disorganized, that the previous paragraphs had tried to summarize,
They passed in front of cafรฉs and pastry shops with French and Italian names, into which they didnโt let themselves enter, and through a lace curtain, she recognizes the flowery cloth, the bird stuffed and mended and ribbons of silk that she saw made, piece by piece, and now crowned an invisible head. They arrived at the statue of the French duke whose name didnโt mean anything to them; pallidly, intermittently, it was illuminated by the splendor of the London Hotel. At a distance, the ships anchored in the port also conceded some reflection to the black earth, murmuring.
She doesnโt comment on the story that she has listened to with rapt attention.
โWhen do you embark?โ
โTomorrow. The ship leaves at six in the afternoon, but the third- class passengers have to be on board before noon.
She looks at him, but the words donโt come. After an instant, she insists.
โAre you going to travel alone?
He looks at her, understanding, and without daring to believe what his understands.
โTake me with you! Iโm almost blond, I have light eyes if not light blue, Iโm a little less than on meter sixty-five and Iโm eighteen years old. By any chance is there a photograph in the letter of safe passage?โ
โBut. . .โ, he is able to stammer. โWe are not married. . .โ
The loud laugh that she resounds in the deserted plaza, seems to roll down the stairway and awaken an echo in the port.
โHow could we be married if Iโm Orthodox and you are Jewish. We would need months for a rabbi to accept my conversion. . . Moreover, didnโt you say that in this new country, everything that enslaves us here doesnโt matter at all. Letโs go!
Before Danielโs stupefied face, she began to spin around herself, with her arms extended, like a dervish from Anatolia. Without stopping laughing, she repeats like an incantation the names that she had heard mentioned for the first time a moment ago. –Buenos Aires! Rosario! Entre Rรญos! Santa Fe! Argentina! She laughs more and more strongly and she doesnโt stop spinning..
Algunos libros de Edgardo Cozarinsky/Some of Edgardo Cozarinsky’s Books
EDGARDO COZARINSKY
BIBLIOGRAFรA/BIBLIOGRAPHY
Crรณnica y relato/Non-fiction and stories: Vudรบ urbano, 1985 La novia de Odessa, 2001. El pase del testigo, 2001. Museo del chisme, 2005. Tres fronteras 2006. Palacios plebeyos, 2006. Milongas, 2007. Burundanga, 2009. Blues, 2010. Nuevo museo del chisme, 2013.
Novela/Novel:
Maniobras nocturnas, 2007. Lejos de dรณnde, 2009. La tercera maรฑana, 2010 Dinero para fantasmas, 2012
PREMIOS/PRIZES Premio “La Naciรณn” de Ensayo, compartido con Josรฉ Bianco. 1973 Premio Konex de platino y Diploma al Mรฉrito, categorรญa “Cuento: Quinquenio 1999 – 2003”. 2004 Premio Cรณndor a la trayectoria, de la Asociaciรณn Argentina de Crรญticos de Cine. 2004 Prix de l’Avenir, Rencontres Internationales du Cinรฉma ร Paris, por “Ronda nocturna”. 2005 Primer premio de narrativa bienio 2001-2003 por “La novia de Odessa” de Ministerio de Cultura, Gobierno de la ciudad autรณnoma de Buenos Aires. 2008 Premio Cรณndor a la Innovaciรณn Artรญstica por “Apuntes para una biografรญa imaginaria” 2011 Premio a la mejor novela 2008-2010 de la Academia Argentina de Letras por “Lejos de dรณnde”. 2011
Pablo A. Freinkel (Bahรญa Blanca, Argentina, 1957). Licenciado en Bioquรญmica. Periodista y escritor. Sus artรญculos y notas se han dado a conocer en Buenos Aires, New York y Jerusalem; y en medios online nacionales y extranjeros. Es autor de cuatro libros: Diccionario Biogrรกfico Bahiense, el ensayo Metafรญsica y Holocausto, y las novelas El dรญa que Sigmund Freud asesinรณ a Moisรฉs y Los destinos sagrados. Escribiรณ el guiรณn del documental Matthias Sindelar: un gol por la vida. Ha dictado conferencias sobre Spinoza, Maimรณnides y literatura judรญa argentina actual, en diferentes instituciones del paรญs. Se encuentra en redacciรณn El lector de Spinoza.
Pablo A. Freinkel (Bahรญa Blanca, Argentina,) who has a degree in biochemistry. He is a journalist and writer. His articles and notes have been published in Buenos Aires, New York and Jerusalem, in Argentine and international online media. Freinkel is the author of four books: Diccionario Biogrรกfico Bahiense, Metafรญsica y Holocausto, and the novel El dรญa que Sigmund Freud asesinรณ a Moisรฉs and Los destinos sagrados. He wrote the script for Matthias Sindelar: un gol por la vida. He has lectured on Spinoza, Maimonides and on contemporary Argentine-Jewish literature throughout Argentina. His El lector de Spinoza is in press.
_________________________________________
Escrita con un pulso narrativo muy dinรกmico y hasta casi hipnรณtico -de esos que dificultan la interrupciรณn de la lectura- Pablo Freinkel nos relata una historia que, si bien se desarrolla cercana a la comunidad judรญa (son imperdibles y muy interesantes los detalles acerca de las costumbres y tradiciones del pueblo judรญo) nos atrapa de principio a fin. — Pablo Bauchiero, Buenos Aires, 2019.
_______________________________________
Written with a very dynamic and even almost hypnotic narrative pulse – one of those that make it difficult to interrupt reading – Pablo Freinkel tells us a story that, although it takes place close to the Jewish community (the details about the customs and traditions of the Jewish people) grabs us from beginning to end. — Pablo Bauchiero, Buenos Aires, 2019.
โ ยกEso es lo de menos! โSonia se exasperรณ por no poder hacerse comprender cรณmo deseabaโ ยกDebe haber algo! ยกYo sรฉ que hay algo!
Intentรฉ calmar su enojo con una recopilaciรณn de los hechos conocidos hasta ese momento.
-Hace muchos aรฑos, segรบn te contรณ un hombre mayor, un grupo de judรญos, quizรก disidentes o marginales de la comunidad central, se reunรญa en esta casa para celebrar sus fiestas.
Un paredรณn cortaba de manera abrupta la callejuela sombrรญa. A escasos metros de allรญ, frente a nosotros, la fachada del inmueble mostraba las cicatrices de aรฑos a la intemperie y la ausencia de mantenimiento. No habรญa diferencia alguna entre este y las construcciones de su entorno, excepto que encima de la puerta de entrada se destacaba una estrella de David inscripta en un cรญrculo. No era un sรญmbolo extraรฑo en sรญ, ya que la mayorรญa de los templos hebreos presentaba esa ornamentaciรณn. El enigma consistรญa en saber si alguna vez ese edificio habรญa funcionado como sede de alguna instituciรณn comunitaria.
A mi lado, Sonia, anhelante, esperaba una reacciรณn que la convenciera de que no se habรญa equivocado.
-ยกSรญ! โaplaudiรณ, exaltadaโ. Creรญ que no te ibas a acordar.
โTambiรฉn me dijiste entonces que era un buen material para investigar y que te parecรญa… romรกntico โcasi se desmayรณ de la emociรณn. Se pegรณ a mรญ y pude sentir el palpitar de su corazรณn. Todo su cuerpo emanaba un hรกlito de tierna calidez.
Hacรญa referencia a una circunstancia ocurrida un par de aรฑos atrรกs, cuando yo me encontraba en la disyuntiva de exponer una investigaciรณn periodรญstica acerca de las causas que habรญan motivado al doctor Sigmund Freud a declarar que el hรฉroe hebreo Moisรฉs no fue mรกs que un simple egipcio sin conexiรณn alguna con el pueblo elegido, la cual creรญa que iba a constituirse en la base de mi lanzamiento profesional y personal, o huir sin atenuantes para continuar mi existencia carente de sentido. Finalmente, presentรฉ mi labor y no sucediรณ ninguna de las alternativas consideradas. Ahora, segรบn la apreciaciรณn de mi esposa, el misterio de esta casa se presentaba como una segunda oportunidad, en esta ocasiรณn para salvarme de caer en una depresiรณn de lรญmites imprecisos.
โNo entiendo โdije eligiendo las palabras para no provocar su frustraciรณnโ. ยฟQuรฉ hay para investigar? Es una casa antigua que no dice nada, y sรญ, tal vez en algรบn momento, haya funcionado como templo o club social.
Fue entonces cuando explotรณ:
โยกEso es lo de menos! ยกDebe haber algo! ยกYo sรฉ que hay algo!
Mirรณ el despojo que tenรญa ante sus ojos casi llorosos por la desilusiรณn, como si le quisiera arrancar alguna palabra, una clave que la condujera a una pista y de allรญ a la resoluciรณn de su secreto. Las mejillas habรญan enrojecido, un ligero temblor agitaba sus labios y por encima de ellos brillaban unas gotas de transpiraciรณn. De pronto, de uno de los bolsillos de su campera extrajo una cรกmara fotogrรกfica. Tomaba instantรกneas casi sin mirar, en sucesiรณn ininterrumpida; se movรญa de aquรญ para allรก, enfocรกndose en la estrella inscripta en el cรญrculo. Yo la miraba hacer y creรญa ver en sus acciones una manera de evitar la rendiciรณn, el naufragio definitivo de su esperanza. Poco a poco su humor fue cambiando; el enojo se moderaba, la crispaciรณn mudaba en desenfado. De inmediato comenzรณ a reรญrse, a expresar una alegrรญa juguetona y despreocupada. Llovieron fotografรญas sobre mรญ desde todos los รกngulos posibles, incluso los mรกs descarados. Yo me contagiรฉ de su cascabeleo. La risa se nos pegaba, uniรฉndonos en una danza mรกgica. Hasta que interrumpiรณ el descontrol con una frase concluyente:
It was then that she exploded: โThatโs the least of it! There has to be something. I know that there is something!โ
She looked at the dilapidation in front of her almost tearful eyes, as if she wanted to pull out a word, a key that would lead her to a trail and from there a resolution of its secret. He cheeks had reddened, a light trembling in her lips and above them shined a few drops of perspiration. Immediately, from one of the pockets or her jacket, she took out a camera. She took snapshots, almost without looking, in uninterrupted succession; she moved from here to there, focusing on the star WRItten in the circle. I watched her do it and believed I saw in her actions a manner to avoid surrender, the definitive ship wreck of her hopes. Little by little, her mood was changing; her anger cooled, the tension became ease. Suddenly, she began to laugh, to express a playful and unworried joy. Photographs rained over me from all angles, including the most shameless. I was infected by her jingling. The laughter stuck us together, uniting us in a magical dance. Until she interrupted the lack of control with a concluding phrase:
โ ยกMe muero de hambre!
La mirรฉ, seguramente con la estรบpida expresiรณn de un hombre enamorado. El arrebol de sus mejillas se habรญa intensificado; brillaban sus ojos, los labios entreabiertos invitaban al encuentro, el deseo vibraba en cada fibra de nuestro ser. Ella puso fin a ese momento con un gesto indolente, un mohรญn que la hizo mรกs bella si esto era posible. Guardรณ la cรกmara y empezรณ a caminar hacia la calle que marcaba el lรญmite de la cortada. En eso se detuvo mirando a su alrededor.
โ ยฟQuรฉ pasa? โquise saber hablรกndole desde unos pasos atrรกs.
โNi siquiera sabemos cรณmo se llama este recoveco โmirรณ a uno y otro lado buscando en vano un cartel de seรฑalizaciรณnโ. No podemos irnos sin saberlo. ยกEs importante!
Sin pensarlo, encarรณ hacia una de las casas y tocรณ el timbre. El ladrido de uno o varios perros respondiรณ a la chicharra y poco despuรฉs se asomรณ una mujer mayor, menuda, cuya cabeza estaba cubierta por pequeรฑos ruleros colocados apretadamente uno junto al otro, con una redecilla invisible sosteniendo el conjunto. Nos mirรณ con precauciรณn dando un paso atrรกs, hacia el interior. Usaba un vestido viejo y encima un abrigo de lana deformado por los varios de aรฑos de servicio.
โ ยฟQuรฉ se les ofrece? โgraznรณ una voz pastosa.
โDiscรบlpenos, buena seรฑora โSonia utilizaba sus mejores modales, pero estos a veces se confundรญan con un tono sarcรกsticoโ, ยฟserรญa tan amable de decirnos el nombre de esta calle?
La mujer nos volviรณ a mirar, sus ojos relampaguearon y con una sonrisa en sus labios finos y resecos, respondiรณ antes de desaparecer tras la puerta:
โLa calle de Caรญn.
La actitud y las palabras de la vieja habรญan impresionado a mi esposa, que se mantuvo en silencio por varias cuadras rumbo a nuestro departamento. Me sorprendรญa su falta de reacciรณn, la ausencia de comentarios, el andar cabizbajo. Verdaderamente, ese encuentro habรญa hecho un fuerte impacto en Sonia. Permanecรญa callada ante mis insistentes requisitorias, se molestaba cuando yo la distraรญa del ensimismamiento en que se habรญa sumido. A poco de llegar a destino, se parรณ en seco y me mirรณ como si fuera la primera vez que me tenรญa frente a ella. Entonces dijo con una gravedad que apenas le conocรญa:
โ ยฟCรณmo hizo esa mujer para ponerse los ruleros uno tan cerca del otro sin que se le escapara una sola mecha de pelo?
La observรฉ incrรฉdulo, pasmado, sin poder salir de mi asombro. Habรญa andado casi un kilรณmetro sin hablar, creyendo que estaba sumergida en vaya uno a saber quรฉ pensamientos profundos, y lo รบnico que habรญa ocupado su mente era la destreza de la anciana para colocarse esos ridรญculos adminรญculos en la cabeza.
โ ยฟEso es todo? โle preguntรฉ atorado por la rabia.
โ ยฟQuรฉ?
โLo รบnico que te llamรณ la atenciรณn de esa mujer.
โEs una tonterรญa, ya sรฉ. Pero hay que reconocerle habilidad y pericia para lograr esa perfecciรณn.
Me di vuelta y seguรญ mi camino, dejรกndola varios metros atrรกs. Ella corriรณ para ponerse a la par y empezรณ a embromarme, a burlarse de mรญ hasta que no tolerรฉ mรกs y, atrayรฉndola hacia mรญ, le estampรฉ un beso apasionado que la dejรณ sin aire.
โ ยกCaballero! ยฟCรณmo se atreve?
Una vez en casa, retirรณ una pizza del freezer y la colocรณ en el horno de microondas. A pesar de que reconocรญa su utilidad en momentos complicados, yo detestaba esas comidas rรกpidas y para no ocasionar una discusiรณn inรบtil dejรฉ pasar la cuestiรณn. En tanto la electricidad hacรญa su trabajo, ella fue a la computadora. Conectรณ la cรกmara digital al CPU y la primera toma apareciรณ en la pantalla. Era una imagen panorรกmica de la casa: la puerta, las dos ventanas, el estado general de deterioro. Una a una, desfilaban las fotografรญas sin aportar ningรบn detalle que nos pusiera en la huella. La alarma del horno nos sacรณ de clima justo cuando empezaban a verse las fotos que me ubicaban en la escena en cuestiรณn.
Fuimos a almorzar sin expectativas de hallar nada. La primera ronda de imรกgenes habรญa sido decepcionante, circunstancia que se tradujo en la falta de รญmpetu siquiera para comentar la reciente aventura. Mientras comรญamos, Sonia tenรญa la vista fija en la bandeja de la pizza como si la interrogara en procura de respuestas. Me molestaban esos silencios, asรญ que para licuar la tensiรณn tratรฉ de ver las cosas con optimismo:
โEs inรบtil hacerse problemas por algo que no sabemos si existe. Vamos a echarle una mirada a esas fotografรญas y si no obtenemos resultados concretos, nos despedimos de todo el asunto.
โNo โreplicรณ sin atenuantesโ. Puedo sentir que allรญ efectivamente tenemos una punta de lo que buscamos.
โยฟY quรฉ buscamos? โpreguntรฉ interesado en su respuesta.
โTe lo dirรฉ cuando lo encontremos.
Los argumentos de esa naturaleza no se pueden discutir: A es B porque B es A, carecen en absoluto de lรณgica. Puse un punto final y elogiรฉ el excelente sabor de la pizza.
Despuรฉs de hacer orden en la cocina, regresamos a la computadora. Otra vez desfilaron las imรกgenes. Esta vez, utilizamos el zoom para observar detalles que a simple vista se nos pudiesen haber escapado. Miramos una por una hasta que en la pantalla brillรณ nuevamente la primera de la serie dedicada a mรญ. Sonia esbozรณ una sonrisa; acercaba y alejaba la imagen a gusto mientras uno de mis ojos ocupaba todo el espacio o mi nariz se reducรญa hasta la insignificancia. Ahora ella jugaba, se divertรญa. Repetรญa la misma operaciรณn con cada una de las tomas estallando en carcajadas. En realidad, yo ya me estaba aburriendo y le prestaba poca atenciรณn.
โMiren la orejita de Marquitos โescuchรฉ que decรญa en tono dicharachero. Desviรฉ la mirada hacia la pantalla y en efecto allรญ estaba mi oreja en primer plano. Iba a decirle que ya era suficiente cuando notรฉ un detalle repentino, apenas una sombra.
โEsperรก, esperรก โle dije con un grito cuando se aprestaba a avanzar. Sonia se sobresaltรณ y quedรณ estรกticaโ. Buscรก el centro de la estrella… Andรก paso a paso… no te apures.
La imagen quedรณ fija en el hexรกgono delimitado por la intersecciรณn de los dos triรกngulos que conformaban la estrella. Allรญ, en el centro, en medio de la figura de seis lados, destacaba lo que podรญa ser apenas un cambio de textura, una sombra o una de las tantas irregularidades en el revoque por obra del paso del tiempo. Tal vez, la necesidad de ver algo para compensar las horas perdidas en esa tarea. Tenรญa el aspecto de una letra โrโ de imprenta al revรฉs o, quizรก, podรญa ser tambiรฉn una coma o un bastรณn. A pesar de la falta de precisiรณn, era similar a algo conocido que todavรญa no podรญa precisar.
โ ยฟVes esto? โpreguntรฉ acompaรฑando una y otra vez el contorno que aparecรญa en la pantalla con mi dedo รญndice derecho extendido.
โEstรก muy borroso, quizรก sea una imperfecciรณn.
โ ยกPero lo ves! โreiterรฉ para borrar la duda que tenรญa.
โSรญ, acรก estรก โme quitรณ la mano y empezรณ a copiar mi movimientoโ. No es tu imaginaciรณn. Creo.
La mirรฉ como haciรฉndole notar que su รบltima observaciรณn estaba de mรกs.
โEstรก bien, estรก bien โdijo cubriรฉndose la cabeza, previendo un posible ataque que naturalmente nunca llegรณโ. Bueno, querido, preparate. Maรฑana tenemos una nueva excursiรณn hasta la casa del misterio. Pero en esta ocasiรณn, llevaremos una escalera.
Una vez mรกs, Sonia me sorprendiรณ con su iniciativa. Las dudas que yo podรญa albergar, para ella eran certezas incontrastables. Allรญ habรญa algo y tenรญamos la obligaciรณn de descubrirlo. Con total espontaneidad habรญa titulado el asunto como โla casa del misterioโ. Habrรญan de pasar varios dรญas para que ella misma lo redefiniera como โla casa de Caรญnโ.
โThatโs the least of it!โ Sonia was exasperated for not being able to be understood as she wished. There must be something! I know that there is something!
She tried to calm her anger with a review of the facts known up to that moment.
โYears ago, according to what an old man tole you, a group of Jews, perhaps dissidents or separated from the central community, met in that house to celebrate their parties.
A wall cut abruptly into the cheerless alley. A few meters ahead, in front of us, the faรงade of the building showed the scars of years of weather and the absence of maintenance. There was no difference at all between this one and the buildings of the area, except that above the entrance door stood out a Star of David within circle. In itself, it wasnโt a strange symbol, since the majority of Jewish temples carry this ornamentation. The enigma consisted in knowing if at one time that building had functioned as the headquarters for a community organization.
At my side, Sonia, eager, hoped for a reaction that would convince her that she hadnโt been mistaken.
โYes!, she approved, very excited, โI thought you werenโt going to remember.โ
โYou also told me that then that it was a good subject to investigate and that it seemed to you โromantic.โ You almost fainted from the emotion. She stuck tight to me and I could hear the beating of her heart. Her entire body emanated a breath of tender warmth.
She was making reference to a circumstance that had occurred a couple of years earlier, when I entered in the quandary whether to expound a journalistic investigation about the causes that had motivated Dr. Sigmund Freud to declare that the Jewish hero Moses wasnโt not more than a simple Egyptian without any connection whatsoever with the chosen people, that he believed was going to constitute the my launch personally and professionally, or flee, without extenuating circumstances to continue my meaningless existence. Finally, I presented my work and neither of the considered alternatives took place. Now, according to my wifeโs view, the mystery of this house presented itself as a second opportunity, in this occasion to save me from a depression of imprecise limits.
โYou also told me that then that it was a good subject to investigate and that it seemed to you โromantic.โ You almost fainted from the emotion. She stuck tight to me and I could hear the beating of her heart. Her entire body emanated a breath of tender warmth.
She was making reference to a circumstance that had occurred a couple of years earlier, when I entered in the quandary whether to expound a journalistic investigation about the causes that had motivated Dr. Sigmund Freud to declare that the Jewish hero Moses wasnโt not more than a simple Egyptian without any connection whatsoever with the chosen people, that he believed was going to constitute the my launch personally and professionally, or flee, without extenuating circumstances to continue my meaningless existence. Finally, I presented my work and neither of the considered alternatives took place. Now, according to my wifeโs view, the mystery of this house presented itself as a second opportunity, in this occasion to save me from a depression of imprecise limits.
โYou also told me that then that it was a good subject to investigate and that it seemed to you โromantic.โ You almost fainted from the emotion. She stuck tight to me and I could hear the beating of her heart. Her entire body emanated a breath of tender warmth.
She was making reference to a circumstance that had occurred a couple of years earlier, when I entered in the quandary whether to expound a journalistic investigation about the causes that had motivated Dr. Sigmund Freud to declare that the Jewish hero Moses wasnโt not more than a simple Egyptian without any connection whatsoever with the chosen people, that he believed was going to constitute the my launch personally and professionally, or flee, without extenuating circumstances to continue my meaningless existence. Finally, I presented my work and neither of the considered alternatives took place. Now, according to my wifeโs view, the mystery of this house presented itself as a second opportunity, in this occasion to save me from a depression of imprecise limits.
The attitude and words of the old lady had impressed my wife, who maintained silence for several blocks on the way to our apartment. Her lack of a reaction surprised me, the absence of comments, the walking head down. Truly, that meeting had had a strong impact on Sonia. She remained quiet against my insistent requests; she was bothered when I distracted her from the self-absorption into which she had sunk. A bit before arriving at her destination, she stopped cold and looked at me as if it were the first time she had me in front of her, Then, she said with a gravity that I hardly knew she had:
โHow did that women put her rollers so close together without a single a single bit of hair escaping?
I observed her, incredulous, confounded, without being able to get over my surprise. She had walked almost a kilometer without speaking, I, believing that she was immersed in who knows what profound thoughts, and the only thing that had occupied her mind was the old ladyโs skill in placing those ridiculous gadgets on her head
โThatโs all?โ tongue-tied with anger, I asked her.
โWhat?
โThe only thing that caught your attention about that woman.โ
โItโs nonsense, I know. But you have to recognize her skill and expertise in achieving that perfection. I turned around and continued on my way, leaving her several meters behind. She ran to catch me, and she began to tease me, to make fun of me until I couldnโt take it anymore, and bringing her close to me, I hurled a kiss at her that left her without air.
โSir, how dare you?โ
Once at home, she took a pizza from the freezer and placed in the microwave oven. Although I recognize their utility in complicated times, I detest these quick dinners and in order to avoid a useless discussion, I let the issue pass. As soon as the electricity did its work, she went to the computer. She connected the digital camara to the CPU and the first shot appeared on the screen. It was a panoramic image of the house: the door, the two windows, the general state of deterioration. One after one, the photographs filed past without adding any detail that might put us on the trail. The oven alarm took us out of the fixation just when photos that placed me in the scene in question,
We went to have lunch without the expectation of finding anything. The first round of images had been disappointing, a circumstance the translated into a lack of impetus to even comment on the recent adventure. While we ate, Sonia had her eyes fixed on the pizza tray as if she were interrogating it to search of answers. I detest these silences. These silences bother me, so to melt the tension, I tried to see things with optimism:
โItโs useless to create problems about something that we donโt know if it exists. Weโll take a look at these photos, and if we donโt get concrete results, weโll say goodbye to the matter.โ
โNoโ she replied without any hesitation. โI can feel that here we have, in effect, a starting point for what weโre looking for.โ
โAnd what are we looking for?โ I asked, interested in her answer.
โI will tell you when we find it.โ
Arguments of this nature canโt be discussed: A is B because B is A, absolutely is illogical. I put a final point to it, and I praised the excellent taste of the pizza.
After straightening up the kitchen, we returned to the computer. Once again, the images filed by. This time, we used the zoom to observe details that at a quick look could have escaped us. We looked at one after another until on the screen shined again the first series dedicated to me. Sonia gave a hint of a smile and moved away from the image as she pleased, while one my eyes occupied all of the space or my nose was reduced to insignificance. Now she was playing, enjoying herself. She repeated the same operation with each of the shots, breaking out in loud laughter. Truthfully, I was getting bored and I didnโt pay much attention to her.
โLook at Marquitosโ earโ I heard in a chatty tome. I diverted my gaze to the screen and in effect there was my ear in the closeup. I was going to tell her to stop, when I noticed a sudden detail, hardly a shadow.
โWait, waitโ I told her with a shout when she was about to advance. Sonia was startled and stopped ecstatic. โLook in the center of the star. . . Go bit by bit. . . Donโt hurry. It had the aspect of the letter โrโ printed backwards, or , perhaps it could also be a comma or a walking stick. Despite the lack of precision, it was similar
The image remained fixed in the hexagon delineated by the intersection of the two triangles that made-up the star. There in the center, in the midlle of the six-sided figure, stood out what could be a slight change in texture, a shadow or one of those many irregularities in plaster in the caused by the passage of time. Perhaps, the necessity to see something to compensate for the hours lost in the task. It had the aspect of the letter โrโ printed backwards, or perhaps it could be a comma or a walking stick. In spite of the lack or precision, it was similar to something known that I could not yet determine.
โDo you see this?โ I asked once and again with the outline that appeared on the screen with my right index finger.
โItโs very blurred. Perhaps, itโs an imperfection.?
โBut you see it!โ I reiterated to put away the doubts she had.
โYes, here it is!โ She took away my hand and began to copy my movement. โItโs not your imagination. I think.โ
I watched her making a note that her last observation was a bit too strong.
โItโs okay! Itโs okay! I said, covering my face anticipating an attack that naturally never happened/arrived.
โGood, my dear! Prepare yourself. Tomorrow we will have a new excursion to the mystery house. But this time, weโll bring a ladder.
Once more, Sonia surprised me with her initiative. The doubts that I could harbor were for her unshakeable certainties. There was something there, and we had the obligation to find it. With total spontaneity, she had entitled the matter: โthe house of mystery.โ Several days would have to pass before she would redefine it as โThe House of Cain.โ
David Viรฑas naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1929. Estudiรณ en el Liceo militar a causa de los problemas econรณmicos familiares. Estudiรณ Filosofรญa y Letras, allรญ conociรณ a algunos intelectuales. Fue uno de los fundadores, en 1953, de la revista Contorno. Al poco tiempo publicรณ su primera novela Cayรณ sobre su rostro. Recibiรณ en 1962 el Premio Nacional de Literatura. En 1967 fue galardonado con el Premio Casa de las Amรฉricas, de La Habana (. Tambiรฉn ha sido capital su aportaciรณn al ensayo con libros como Literatura argentina y realidad polรญtica: de Sarmiento a Cortรกzar o Rebeliones populares argentinas: De los montoneros a los anarquistas. La dictadura le robรณ a sus dos hijos, ambos acaban de ser padres cuando los detuvieron, y fueron desaparecidos por los militares, y lo obligรณ a exiliarse en Mรฉxico y Espaรฑa. En Mรฉxico fundรณ la editorial Tierra del Fuego junto a Pedro Orgambide, Jorge Boccanera, Alberto รdelach y Humberto Costantini, en 1981. En 1984 pudo regresar a Argentina tras el fin de la dictadura. Fue nombrado titular de la Cรกtedra de Literatura Argentina de la Facultad de Filosofรญa y Letras de la Universidad de Buenos Aires. En los aรฑos siguientes se sucedieron los estrenos teatrales. En 1991 recibiรณ la la Beca Guggenheim pero la rechazรณ como homenaje a sus hijos.
David Viรฑas was born in Buenos Aires in 1929. He studied at the Military Lyceum because of family financial problems. He studied Philosophy and Letters, there he met some intellectuals. He was one of the founders, in 1953, of the magazine Contorno. Soon after, he published his first novel. It fell on his face. He received in 1962 the National Prize for Literature. In 1967 he was awarded the Casa de las Amรฉricas Prize. His contribution to the essay has also been capital with books such as Argentine literature and political reality: from Sarmiento to Cortรกzar or Argentine popular rebellions: From the montoneros to the anarchists. The dictatorship stole his two sons, both of whom had just become parents when they were detained, and who were disappeared by the military, and forced him into exile in Mexico and Spain. In Mexico he founded the Tierra del Fuego publishing house together with Pedro Orgambide, Jorge Boccanera , Alberto รdelach and Humberto Costantini, in 1981. In 1984 he was able to return to Argentina after the end of the dictatorship.He was appointed holder of the Chair of Argentine Literature at the Faculty of Philosophy and Letters of the University of Buenos Aires. Theatrical premieres followed, in 1991 he received the Guggenheim Scholarship but rejected it as a tribute to his children.
Claro que estaban รฉsos de la guardia blanca. Vicente ya los conocรญa; en Buenos Aires, desde su departamento de la calle Ayacucho los habรญa visto golpear a la gente del barrio en la semana de enero en 19.[i] Y rompรญan vidrieras y ensuciaban las sinagogas. Habรญa sido un lunes y por las calles de la ciudad deambulaban algunos hombres solitarios y sudorosos, con las corbatas flojas y el saco en la mano. Los que acababa de ver en el puerto y los que tiraban bombas de alquitrรกn contra las sinagogas de Buenos Aires se parecรญan, desde la manera de golpear y reรญrse al mismo tiempo, hasta la insolencia se confeccionaban para insultar y pararse en medio de la calle con las piernas abiertas. Eran tipos que gritabanโโJudรญo sucioโ con la misma calma que se instalaban a la salida de un jardรญn israelita para obligarles a cantar el Himno, โOรญd mortales el grito sagrado!โ Sรญ, pensaba. Y desde su balcรณn de la calle Ayacucho habรญa visto a esos chiquilines que cantaban destempladamente, espiando a sus maestras y esperando que les ordenasen que se callaran de una vez porque el Himno no se canta asรญ, o que se largaran a correr hacia sus casas. Pero en 1910, cuando el Centenario.รฉl, รฉl mismo, Vicente habรญa hecho algo parecido. Era mรกs joven claro. Pero las balas de su revรณlver corrรญan por debajo del paรฑo verde de los billares en esos cafรฉs oscuros y bajos de la calle Libertad. Dos, tres, seis tiros sobre esas mesas mientras los parroquianos se apoyaban en sus tacos con inquietud hierรกticos, extranjeros, pero con esa silenciosa y acusadora dignidad de las vรญctimas. Habรญa olor a pรณlvora en aquella sala de billar. Un judรญo de rancho, insignificante, habรญa seguido frotando la tiza sobre su taco. Vicente vaciรณ su revรณlver sobre una de las mesas de billar. Las balas se deslizaban por debajo del paรฑo como unos extraรฑos gusanos veloces y aturdidos. Eso habรญa sido para divertirse, por cierto. Como รฉl iba a pasar sus horas muertas en uno de los prostรญbulos enfrente a los tribunales, le quedaba cerca. Era una diversiรณn cercana. โUn trabajo a un paso de la farraโ, comentaban en el Gimnasia y Esgrima. Los tribunales de un lado, y a la vuelta, el prostรญbulo y los billares judรญos de la calle Libertad. Todo ahรญ no mรกs. โUn verdadero centro de diversionesโ proclamaba entonces. Pero es que todos los prostรญbulos estaban atestados de judรญos y muchos judรญos andaban en ese negocio.[iii]โLas polacasโ, les decรญan los amigos en el club. โY una polaca le da vuelta y media a cinco francesasโ. ย Y todos se divertรญan con las judรญas que al fin de cuentas, eran lo mismo. รl, sus compaรฑeros de la facultad en el aรฑo del Centenario y la guardia blanca en la semana de enero del 19. Pero con la diferencia que รฉl lo habรญa hecho para pasar el rato, total, no eran mรกs que los paรฑos de los billares. Ademรกs, unos dรญas despuรฉs habรญa ido a pagarlos. Pasar el rato, de eso se trataba, porque รฉl no tenรญa nada contra los judรญos, que eran gente trabajadora y no se metรญan con nadie. Aunque un pocoโฆ un pocoโฆ ยฟCรณmo dirรญa?, calculaba Vicente. Poco elegantes. Ahรญ estaba. No eran lindos los judรญos y quรฉ se la iba a hacer. Se nacรญo fiero o se nacรญa con pinta de macho. Una vez le habรญan comentado en la mesa de Ingenieros: โUsted es el precursor de las guardias blancas. Verรกโโ Y Vicente no habรญa sabido si se lo decรญan en serio o en divertirse. รl no tenรญa prejuicios. Y no pensaba eso para darse una explicaciรณn que lo tranquilizarse.
[i] Laย Semana Trรกgicaย es el nombre con el que se conoce la represiรณn y masacre sufrida por elย movimiento obrero argentino, en la que fueron asesinadas cientos de personas enย Buenos Aires, en la segunda semana de enero deย 1919,ย La misma incluyรณ el รบnicoย pogromoย (matanza de judรญos) del que se tiene registro en Amรฉrica. Dentro de la Semana Trรกgica se produjo el รบnicoย pogromoย (matanza de judรญos) del que hay registro en el continente americano. El pogromo tuvo su epicentro en elย barrio judรญo de Once. Elย pogromoย se desatรณ cuando promediaba la Semana Trรกgica y se sumaron a la represiรณn los civiles de clase alta, Fue llevado a cabo por laย Liga Patriรณtica Argentina, โla guardia blanca”; incendiaron sinagogas. Hubo centenares de muertos
[ii] La prostituciรณn en Argentina fue dominada por judรญos por muchos aรฑos. Fue terminado por protesta vehementes de la comunidad judรญa y legislaciรณn del gobiernos.
Of course, those of the White Guard were there. Vicente knew them already; in Buenos Aires, from his apartment on Ayacucho Street, he had seen them strike the people of the neighborhood in the January week of 1919. [i]And they broke store windows and the befouled the synagogues. It had been a Monday and solitary and sweaty men wandered the streets, with their ties loose and their jackets in their hands. Those that he had just seen in the port and those who threw tar bombs at the synagogues of Buenos Aires seemed, from their manner to punch and laugh at the same time, to the insolence they had for insulting and stopping in the middle of the street with their legs apart. They were guys who shouted โDirty Jewโ with the same calmness who stood in the exit of a Jewish kindergarten to force them to sing the National Anthem, โHear, O Mortals, the sacred shout!โ Ye, he thought. And from his balcony on Ayacucho Street he had seen those little ones who were singing off-key, spying at their teachers and hoping that they would order them to be quiet at once because the Anthem was not song in that way, or that they leave to run home. But in 1910, which was the Centenary, he, he himself, Vicente had done something similar. Surely, he was younger. But the bullets from his revolver shot below the green cloth of the billiard tables in those dark and humble cafes on Libertad Street. Two, three, six shots over those tables while the neighbors were leaning on their cues. A Jew from the farms, insignificant, had continued rubbing the chalk on his cue. Vicente opened his revolver on a billiard table. The bullets slid under the billiard cloth like some strange and confused worms. This was for fun, of course. Just like he was going to spend his free time in one of the brothels near the courts. It was a nearby diversion. Work just a step from the party, they commented at Gym and Fencing . The gym on one side and, around the corner the Jewish brothel and billiard parlors on Liberty Street. Everything there. Thatโs it. A true center of entertainment, they proclaimed in those days. But it was that all the brothels were filled with Jews and many Jews were in that business. [ii]โThe Polish girlsโ, his friends in the club called them.ย โAnd a Polish girl gives you more than five French girls and they all had a good time with the Jewish girls who, in the end were the same ones. He, his buddies from the college, in the year of the Centenary and the White Guards in the January week of 1919. But the difference was that he had done it to pass the time, they werenโt more that cloths on billiard tables, thatโs all. Moreover, a few days later, he went over to pay for them. To pass the time, thatโs what it was about. Because he didnโt have anything against the Jews, who were hard working people and don’t bother anyone. Although a littleโฆ a little. How would you say it?, Vicenteย reckoned. Not elegant. That was it. The Jews werenโt attractive and what are you going to do. You are born fierce or you were born with a macho look. He had once heard commented at the Engineerโs table. โYou are precursor of the White Guards. Youโll see.โ And Vicente didnโt know whether if it was said to him seriously or in jest. He didnโt have prejudices. And he wasnโt thinking that to give himself an explanation that would calm him down.
_______________________
[i] Tragic Week is the name by which the repression and massacre suffered by the Argentine labor movement is known, in which hundreds of people were murdered in Buenos Aires, in the second week of January 1919, it included the only pogrom (massacre of Jews) that is recorded in America. Within the Tragic Week there was the only pogrom (massacre of Jews) of which there is record in the American continent. The pogrom had its epicenter in the Jewish quarter of Once. The pogrom was unleashed when Tragic Week was averaging and the upper-class civilians joined the repression. It was carried out by the Argentine Patriotic League, “the white guard”; synagogues burned. There were hundreds of deaths.
[ii] While prostitution in Argentina was dominated by Jews for many years., it was terminated by vehement protest from the Jewish community and government legislation.
Con sus novelas Es difรญcil empezar a vivir y Etiquetas a los hombres, se considera a Bernardo Verbitsky como uno de los fundadores de la literatura judรญo-argentina moderna.
______________________________
With his novels It is Difficult to Learn to Live and Labels on Men, Bernardo Verbitsky is considered one of the founders of modern Argentine Jewish literature.
Bernardo Verbitsky abandonรณ los estudios universitarios para dedicarse al periodismo en diversos medios, en particular noticias grรกficas, donde escribiรณ durante muchos aรฑos una columna titulada “Los libros por dentro”. Se convirtiรณ en un retratista de las glorias y miserias de la ciudad de Buenos Aires, muy ligado al tango y al alma de la ciudad. Con su primera novela, Es difรญcil aprender a vivir (1941), obtuvo el premio Ricardo Gรผiraldes.Tanto รฉsta como las siguientes fueron componiendo un amplio fresco de la baja clase media urbana.Fue tambiรฉn guionista y miembro de la Academia Porteรฑa del Lunfardo. Como escritor, dirigiรณ la serie “Letras Argentinas” de Editorial Paidรณs9. Su novela Calles de Tango fue llevada al cine con el tรญtulo Una Cita con la Vida.
Bernardo Verbitsky abandoned his university studies to devote himself to journalism in various media, in particular, graphic news, where he wrote for many years a column entitled “The Books Inside”. He became a portraitist of the glories and miseries of the city of Buenos Aires, closely linked to tango and the soul of the city. His first novel, It is Difficult to Learn to Live (1941), received the Ricardo Gรผiraldes prize. Both this and the following ones composed a large fresco of the lower urban middle class. He was also a scriptwriter and member of the Academia Porteรฑa del Lunfardo. As a writer, he directed the series “Letras Argentinas” of Editorial Paidรณs9. His novel Calles de Tango made into a movie with the title An Appointment with Life.
Por Leo se enteraba de las fiestas judรญas. Le sorprendiรณ la llegada del aรฑo nuevo y fue entonces que conociรณ como una deseable aventura ayunar en Iom-Kipur. La perspectiva de pasar un dรญa entero sin comer ni beber, figurรกbasele como internarse a travรฉs de un tenebroso lugar en que las amenazas acechaban en retorcidas callejuelas que debรญa recorrer extrayendo รกnimo de su propio temor. Imaginรกbase que sรณlo podrรญa arriesgarse en ese viaje de exploraciรณn apenas unas horas y luego deberรญa regresar, como desiste. Al planear este ayuno de Iom-Kipur concedรญa sus mecรกnicas comidas un valor que en realidad no alcanzaba a tener para รฉl el transcurrir de todos los dรญas. Lo que siempre era un cumplido sin conciencia adquirรญa ahora un nuevo relieve. Imponiรฉndose una exagerada y deformada apreciaciรณn, el temor infantil de tener hambre, un temor de un solo bloque, irracional. Un dรญa de hambre. Entonces dejaba de ser un vericueto de tortuosas calles. Una jornada de ayuno se extendรญa como desierto blanquecino sobre el que reverberaba una liviana neblina. Se entretenรญa en su visiรณn, que de pronto entroncรณ con el recuerdo de muchos dรญas del perdรณn que habรญa pasado en el campo. Pensรณ entonces que de ese recuerdo nacรญa lo imaginado y que en ese momento estaba haciendo consciente un rastro de su memoria. Esa neblina blanca recordaba la sinagoga llena de hombres en una tarde calurosa de un dรญa de perdรณn, faltaba pocas horas para el tรฉrmino del ayuno y allรญ seguรญan todos desde el comienzo de la maรฑana, con sus โtalesโ colgados desde los hombros. Ya era una escena marchita. Dรฉbiles, cansados, proseguรญan animosamente. Rostros amarillos transparentes de debilidad. Olor a aglomeraciรณn, olor humano en la tarde calurosa. Zumbaban monรณtonos los rezos y adquirรญan un periรณdico crescendo que, al disminuir, dejaba una sensaciรณn de aburrimiento. Creรญa ver un rayo amarillento de sol atravesando oblicuo la sinagoga, iluminando la sumida palidez de los rostros y el crema claro de los mantos. Por sobre los reunidos flotaba un vaho pesado y agrio. De nuevo el ayuno era un espacio de turbio peligro que no se animaba a atravesar. Parecรญale que al final del dรญa de ayuno se hallarรญa convertido a un exhausto espectro al que agregaba blancas vestiduras que hacรญan juego con tanto desmayo y flojedad. Estar tantas horas a pie en la sinagoga murmurando rezos era convertirse en un cirio que iba ardiendo alimentando lentamente por su propia sustancia. Arder en un mรญstico fuego frรญo, descamarse paulatino y casi insensible, hasta quedar en huesos amarillos, en pellejo marfilino.
No le animรณ tampoco la idea de que millones de judรญos realizaban todos los aรฑos el sacrificio que le acobardaba. En casa no se ayunaba, pensรณ, y a esto se debรญa su manera temerosa de enfrentar su plan. Los millones de judรญos que ayunan anualmente, ยฟeran unos hรฉroes? Reconsiderรณ entonces con un nuevo espรญritu la posibilidad de hacer lo mismo. Si era penoso, mayor el aliciente; ahora descubrรญa y saboreaba el verdadero mรณvil del sacrificio proyectado en honor de lo que le importaba: someterse a un penoso ejercicio, una mortificaciรณn. Se exaltaba pensando que se castigarรญa, por todo. Asรญ vagamente, por todo. Lo imaginaba con fervor, gozando la perspectiva de pedir un mudo perdรณn por todo lo que hacรญa, por todo lo que dejaba de hacer, complaciรฉndose en la oculta penitencia a cumplir. Porque no dirรญa nada a nadie, seguro que de llegarse a saber, todo perderรญa valor y intento volverรญase estรบpido. Ademรกs, mรกs fรกcil era callarlo que comunicรกrselo a alguien. Y sentรญa, ya casi la alegrรญa de ser perdonado.
Alguien lo habรญa dicho alguna vez delante suyo y lo recordaba muy bien. Habรญa sido escrito. Si un judรญo entra en una sinagoga y no sabe rezar como lo demรกs, lo ha de lamentar, le ha de defender su ignorancia. Ahora podรญa comprobarlo en sรญ mismo. Podรญa causarle gracia el asunto, que la tenรญa, pero era asรญ. El hubiera querido leer como todos en su libro. Ese leer era orar, hablarle a Dios. No era necesario arrodillarse, no habรญa mรกs sacerdote que el cantor, y todo se limitaba a decir con palabras con la cabeza alta. Y ya entraba a fantasear sobre un tema, que por interesarle, no dominaba en realidad. Con la cabeza alta y el sombrero puesto permanecรญan los judรญos en la sinagoga. Conversaba con Dios de igual con igual. Ese sombrero que se conservaban puesto los judรญos fue una pequeรฑa preocupaciรณn de los aรฑos infantiles, y ahora interpretaba que los judรญos, ni al hablar con Dios se descubrรญan. Era un poco en broma. Pero tal vez tenรญa una raรญz mรกs seria. Para los judรญos Dios estaba en el hombre, en cada hombre hay algo de Dios, algo divino. Ignoraba si habรญa tal contenido en el judaรญsmo, pero al suponerlo creรญa intuir la verdad o una parte de ella. A travรฉs de las edades se habรญa intentado de la realidad. La religiรณn podrรญa ser eso, un teorรญa de vida, una guรญa para desenvolverse en el mundo. Con los datos aportados por la vieja ciencia, se formรณ la base de muchas religiones. Ninguna tan humana como el judaรญsmo que es mรกs que una religiรณn ya que es un sistema de vida, una posiciรณn ante la existencia, un concepciรณn que tendรญa a elevar al hombre, singular entre todas que las que ofrece la antigรผedad. El socialismo no serรญa sino una interpretaciรณn, adaptada a una ciencia moderna. Eso era casi coincidir casi con los hitleristas, se dijo. Luego se sumergiรณ en un estado de รกnimo especial en el que se mezclaban reproches a su padre por no haberle instruido acerca de esas cosas, y un especie de vocaciรณn furiosa por enterarse de todo cuanto concernรญa al judaรญsmo que ignoraba. Un poco mรกs y hubiese querido ser un viejo rabino sabio, hebraรญsta ducha y capaz en desempeรฑarse hรกbilmente en medio de los libros y las consultas. En fin. Algรบn dรญa lo tomarรญa mรกs en serio. Mientras se formulaba esa promesa de estudio a cumplir en plazo incierto, volviรณ a escuchar el โjazรกnโ que seguรญa su canto plaรฑidero. Le observรณ con atenciรณn. Lo conocรญa muy bien. Era el propio padre de Leo, el honrado y siempre laborioso peletero Porter. Era el mismo, pero era otro. Con su amplio โtalesโ blanco de pura seda, con su mitra de terciopelo negro, parecรญa un obispo de la iglesia ortodoxa. Quedaba bien la palabra archidiรกcono. Pero era mรกs que un archidiรกcono y mรกs que un obispo. Era un rey bรญblico, como Saรบl como David o Salomรณn. Mientras cantaba infatigable no pensaba seguramente en esas cosas, pero para Pablo era eso: Moisรฉs Porter era un rey. Y tal vez todos los judรญos allรญ reunidos eran tantos otros reyes. Todos no, en realidad. Tan sรณlo creyentes. Y Moisรฉs Porter cuando cantaba era un creyente sincero de alma clara. Y รฉl, รฉl tambiรฉn cuando escuchaba su voz suave y modelada a la manera de todos los cantores, se hacรญa la ilusiรณn consoladora de que creรญa en algo. ยฟCreรญa en Dios? Tal vez nada mรกs en la mรบsica, y eso es creer algo. eso de lo de creer no le importaba en este momento tanto. Sรณlo querรญa entender las palabras del libro hebreo que distinguรญa perdidas en el canto. Adoinoi, Malkeini, Acoileinu, de una sonoridad magnรญfica, con muchas vocales, palabras abiertas y hondas, de resonancia musical. Pablo mirรณ a Leo. Este contemplaba satisfecho a su padre, orgullosamente rodeado de sus hijos que formaban el coro. En esa oportunidad los hermanos se vinculaban en el canto mรกs estrechamente que en cualquier otro dรญa del aรฑo, apoyando la voz del padre, que plaรฑรญa con un profundo sabor judรญo en las inflexiones. Pero el coro de los muchachos se escuchaba inseguro, completando un poco tristemente la parte del solista. Pablo y Leo se miraron, poniรฉndose de acuerdo sobre el efecto nada brillante.
–Cantaโdijo Pablo.
Leo este aรฑo habรญa interrumpido una antigua costumbre de cantar acompaรฑando a su padre; separรกndose de Pablo se alejรณ en busca de un manto y se colocรณ entre sus hermanos. De pronto se oyรณ su voz fortaleciendo el languideciente grupo. El canto se enderezรณ, se hizo mรกs denso. Pablo distinguรญa muy bien la bella voz de su amigo en la que hallaba ahora un nuevo tono cรกlido, Al resonar en el alto local se expandรญa libremente, matizรกndose de un timbre familiar pero que no le conocรญa tan acentuado como surgรญa en esa plena voz. Se la individualizaba en el conjunto, pero al mismo tiempo se diluรญa en รฉl y le comunicaba con rara firmeza, le infundรญa una clรกsica sonoridad. Se percibรญa en el ambiente, la impresiรณn que producรญa en el transfigurado coro. Este callรณ y Leo dijo, solo, su parte. La voz, limpia, se modulรณ un minuto por sobre los reunidos y luego al cesar, el zumbido de las oraciones murmuradas se extendiรณ como un blando colchรณn para recibir las notas, que al dejar de cobrar altura iban a caer desde lo alto. Le emocionรณ su amigo con su โschemensreโ. Al terminar el kolnidre comenzรณ a dispersar la gente. Muchos felicitaron a Leo por su canto.
–ยฟQuรฉ vas a hacer esta noche? โpreguntรณ Pablo.
Este se sorprendiรณ la pregunta.
–Y, nada, lo que quieras. Caminamos si querรฉs, iremos a dar al cafรฉ.
–Bueno, vamos โdijo el otro despuรฉs de una vacilaciรณn.
Caminaron juntos. Pablo espontรกneamente comunicativo tratรณ de explicarle cรณmo pudo, lo mucho que le habรญa gustado su canto, la impresiรณn recibida y el efecto de la voz sobre el coro. Estaba como conmovido de amistad y sin deseo de reprimir el sentimiento. Y en contra de lo que habรญa propuesto, decidiรณ informarle su plan de ayuno, para cumplirlo juntos.
Pidiรณ cafรฉ, pero Leo se negรณ a tomar nada. Despuรฉs de un rato de silencio, le dijo con una sonrisa un poco forzada.
–No quiero nada. Te voy a decir por quรฉ. Decidรญ ayunar este aรฑo. Se me ocurriรณ y lo estoy haciendo.
— ยฟEstรกs ayunando?โY luego casi sin querer, agregรณ Pablo–. Yo tambiรฉn pensaba. Te lo iba a proponer ahora. Pensaba que comenzarรญamos esta noche, despuรฉs de cenar.
–ยฟDesde esta noche? โLeo se riรณ โPero eso no ayunar. Nosotros cenamos en mi casa a las seis. Es antes de ir al kolnidre y no se come hasta el dรญa siguiente.
Pablo lo sabรญa. Pero lo habรญa olvidado.
–ยฟNo ves โ siguiรณ Leoโque algunos se quedan ya en la sinagoga para rezar toda la noche? Se ayuna en el dรญa, pero son veinticuatro horas seguidas las que debe suplicarse el perdรณn.
From Leo, he learned about the Jewish holidays. The arrival of the New Year surprised him and it was then that he decided that fasting on Yom Kippur would be an interesting adventure. The idea of spending an entire day without eating or drinking seemed to him like getting himself into a dark place in which the threats were lying in wait in the twisted little streets that he had to pass through, finding energy in his own fear. He imagined that he could only risk a few hours on this voyage of exploration and then return, giving up. On planning this Yom Kippur fast he conceded to his routine meals a value that in reality they didnโt have for him in his daily life. Something that was an unconscious act would acquire a new importance, imposing an exaggerated and deformed appreciation, the infantile fear of being hungry, a fear of a single block, irrational. A day of hunger. Then it ceased being a rough track of tortuous streets. A day without eating extended like a whitish desert above which reverberated a light mist. His vision entertained him, that suddenly connected to the memory of many days of pardon he had experienced in the countryside. He then thought that from that memory was born the what he had imagined and that in that moment a trail of memories was becoming conscious. That white mist reminded him of the synagogue full of men in a hot afternoon of a day of pardon, few hours were left before the end of the fast and there all had continued since early morning, with their tallit hanging from their shoulders. It was already a withered scene. Weak, tired, they went spiritedly. Yellow faces transparent from weakness. Odor of agglomeration, human odor in the hot afternoon. The prayers buzzed on monotonously and they came to a periodical crescendo the, when it diminished, left behind a sensation of boredom. He believed he saw a yellowing ray of sun obliquely crossing the synagogue, illuminating the sunken paleness of the faces and the light cream color of the prayer shawls. On the group was floating a heavy and bitter vapor. Once again the fasting was a turbid danger that he didnโt want to take on. It seemed to him that the end of the fast day, you would be converted into an exhausted specter to which were added white clothing that matched so much dismay and weakness. To spend so many hours standing in the synagogue, murmuring prayers was to convert oneself in a candle that kept on burning, slowly feeding itself on its own substance, To burn in a cold mystical fire, flaking off little by little and almost numb, until leaving yellow bones in ivory-white skin.
Neither did the idea inspire him that millions of Jews carried out every year the sacrifice that frightened. At home, we didnโt fast, he thought; this caused his fearful manner of carrying out/facing his plan. The millions of Jews who fast annually, were they heroes? He then reconsidered with a new spirit the possibility of doing the same thing. If it were awful, greater the inspiration;; now he discovered and savored the true meaning of the sacrifice, done in honor of what was important: to submit himself to a painful exercise, a mortification. He became exalted thinking that he would punish himself, for all. And so, vaguely for all. He imagined it with fervor, enjoying the perspective of asking a mute pardon for everything he was doing, for everything he no longer did, pleasing himself in the hidden penance to be completed. Because he wouldnโt say anything to anybody, sure that if it became known, everything would lose value and intention and become stupid. Moreover, it was easier to keep it quiet than communicate it to anyone. And he felt, already, almost the joy of being pardoned.
Someone had once said in front of him and he remembered it very well. It had been written. If a Jew entered a synagogue and didnโt know how to pray like the others, it was a shame. He had to defend his ignorance. Now he could test this in himself. This could cause him embarrassment, that he didnโt know, but so it was. He would have liked to read in his book like everyone. That reading was praying, speaking to God. It wasnโt necessary to kneel down, there was no other priest than the cantor, and everything was limited to saying words with head held high. An already he began to fantasize about a theme, that though interesting to him, wasnโt based on reality. With head held hid and hat on head, the Jews stayed in the synagogue. They conversed with God as equals. This hat that the Jews kept wearing was based on a minor preoccupation from their childhood years, and now he interpreted that the Jews, speaking with God, discovered themselves. This was in part in jest. But perhaps it had a more serious basis. For the Jews, God was in man, in each man, there is something of God, something divine. He didnโt know if such ideas were part of Judaism, but on thinking so, he believed he intuited the truth or part of it. So. Some day he would take this more seriously. While he was formulating that promise to study at an unspecified time in the future, he listened again to the โHazan,โ the cantor, who continued on with his mournful song. He observed him attentively. He knew him well. He was Leoโs own father, the honored and always hard-working furrier Porter. He was the same, but he was at the same time different. With his ample white tallit of pure silk, with his miter of black velvet, he seemed like a bishop of the Orthodox Church. The title archdeacon suited him well. But he was more than an archdeacon and more than a bishop. He was a biblical king like Saul or David or Solomon. While he tirelessly sang, he surely didnโt think of those things, but for Pablo, thatโs what he was: Moisรฉs Porter was a king. And perhaps all the Jews there together were more kings. Not all, in reality. Only the believers. And Moisรฉs Porter, when he sang, was a sincere believer with a clear soul. And he, he also, when he heard the smooth a voice, formed in the way of all the cantors, Pablo had the consoling illusion that he believed in something. Did he believe in God? Perhaps it was nothing more than the music, but that was to believe in something. At that moment, what to believe in wasnโt so important. He only wanted to understand the words of the Hebrew book that he noticed lost in the singing: Adonei, Malkenui, Acolenu, of a magnificent sonority, with many vowels, open and deep words, with musical resonance. Pablo looked at Leo. With satisfaction, he was contemplating his father, who was proudly surrounded by his sons who formed the choir. In that moment, the brothers were tied to the song more tightly than on any other day of the year, supporting their fatherโs voice, who grieved with profound Jewish flavor in the inflexions. But the chorus of boys sounded unsure, completing a bit sadly the voice of the soloist. Pablo and Leo looked at each other, agreeing that the effect was nothing brilliant.
โSing,โ Pablo said.
This year, Leo had interrupted an old custom of singing in accompaniment of his father; separating himself from Pablo, he went in search of his prayer shawl, and placed himself among his brothers. Immediately, his voice was heard, strengthening the languishing group. The singing strengthened; it became denser. Pablo distinguished very well the beautiful voice of his friend in in which was now a new warm tone. Resonating in the higher tones, it expanded freely, blending a familiar timbre, that Leo didnโt recognize, so extenuated as it surged in that full voice. He showed his individuality in the group, but at the same time it became part of him and he communicated with rare firmness as surged in that full voice. He infused a classical sonority. The impression that he produced in the transfigured choir was noticed throughout the synagogue. The choir became quiet. And, solo, Leo sang his part. His clean voice modulated for a moment over the congregants, and then, on stopping, the buzz of the murmured prayers extended like a white cushion to receive the notes, that after reaching the heights fell from there. His friend was moved by the โscjemensre.โ At the end of Kol Nidre, the people began to disperse. Many congratulated Leo for his singing.
โWhat are you going to do tonight?โ Pablo asked.
The question surprised Leo.
โWell. Nothing. Whatever you like. We can walk if you want; we can go get a coffee.
โOkay, letโs goโ said the other, without vacillation.
They walked together. .Spontaneously communicative, Pablo tried to explain to the extent that he could how much he had enjoyed singing, the reception it received and the effect of his voice on the choir. It was as if he was moved by friendship and without desire to repress his feeling. And in spite of what he had proposed, he decided to tell him about his plan to fast, so that they could do so together.
He ordered coffee, but Leo refused to have anything. After a period of silence, he said to him with a smile that was a bit forced:
โI donโt want anything. I will tell you why. This year I decided to fast. It occurred to me and Iโm doing it.โ
โYou are fasting?โ And then without wanting to, Pablo added. โI also thought about it. Iโm going to propose it to you now. I thought that we would begin tonight, after supper.โ
โStarting tonight?โ Leo laughed. โBut thatโs not fasting. We had supper at home a six oโclock. Itโs before Kol Nidre, and you donโt eat until the next day.โ
Pablo knew, but he had forgotten.
โDidnโt you see?โ Leo continued, โ that some of them stayed in the synagogue to pray all night? You fast during the day, but there are twenty-four hours straight in which you ought to be for asking pardon.
Tamara Tenenbaum naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1989. Tiene una licenciatura en filosofรญa y trabaja como periodista para La Naciรณn, La Agenda, Infobae y otros medios. Es profesora en la Universidad de Buenos Aires y en la Universidad Nacional de las Artes. En 2017, publicรณ Reconocimiento de terreno (Pรกnico el pรกnico), una colecciรณn de poesรญa autobiogrรกfica. En ese mismo aรฑo, ella cocreรณ (con amigos y colegas Marina Yuszczuk y Emilia Erbetta) Rosa Iceberg, una editorial dedicada a libros de mujeres. En abril de 2019, publicรณ El fin del amor (Ariel), una colecciรณn de ensayos sobre el amor y la sexualidad en el siglo XXI. Su primer libro de cuentos, Nadie vive tan cerca de nadie, recibiรณ el Concurso Ficciones y serรก publicado por Emecรฉ.
Tamara Tenenbaum was born in Buenos Aires in 1989. She has a BA in philosophy and works as a journalist for La Naciรณn, La Agenda, Infobae, and other media. She teaches at the Universidad de Buenos Aires and the Universidad Nacional de las Artes. In 2017, she published Reconocimiento de terreno (Pรกnico el pรกnico), an autobiographical poetry collection. In that same year, she co-created (with friends and colleagues Marina Yuszczuk and Emilia Erbetta) Rosa Iceberg, a publishing house devoted to books by women. In April 2019, she published El fin del amor (Ariel), a collection of essays on love and sexuality in the twenty-first century. Her first book of short stories, Nadie vive tan cerca de nadie, was awarded the Concurso Ficciones and will be published by Emecรฉ.
Mi mamรก, mis hermanas y yo nos criamos en una comunidad judรญa ortodoxa, lo que se conoce como ortodoxia moderna. En Buenos Aires se puede ver por la calle mucha gente de nuestro tipo: chicas que tienen la cabeza cubierta pero usan polleras de jean, varones que no usan sombrero grande ni tienen โrulitosโ a los costados pero sรญ barba y kipรก. Nacรญ en 1989 en el Once y vivรญ allรญ hasta los 23 aรฑos, cuando me mudรฉ con una amiga. En tรฉrminos metafรญsicos, por suerte que me fui antes, aunque en otro sentido, una no se va nunca. Los jasรญdicos de Nueva York con sus mujeres cubriรฉndoles la retaguardia me sorprenden, pero no tanto. Mi mamรก, que es mรฉdica y sigue trabajando en el barrio, tiene pacientes asรญ, mรกs o menos asรญ. Casi todas mis compaรฑeras de la primaria estรกn casadas y van por el segundo, tercero o cuarto hijo. Las compaรฑeras de mis hermanas menores tambiรฉn.
En un documental que se llama One of Us dos hombres y una mujer de mi edad cuentan lo difรญcil que les resultรณ la comunidad jasรญdica a la que pertenecรญan, esa misma que vi en Nueva York. Yo la saquรฉ bastante barata, pero mirando el documental en Netflix me sentรญ identificada, particularmente con dos motivos que se repetรญan en los relatos que, en realidad, son un poco lo mismo. El primero es la ignorancia mรกs absoluta de lo que pasa en โel mundo realโ. A veces cuesta explicar que, aunque una viva ahรญ, en una ciudad enorme en el medio de todos, en medio de cualquiera, incluso aunque tenga tele e Internet (yo tenรญa: los chicos del documental no), es como si viviera en otro planeta. Hasta las 12 aรฑos no solamente no habรญa probado jamรณn; ni siquiera sabรญa cรณmo se veรญa, si parecรญa un chancho o un bife (nunca lleguรฉ a sospechar que era un fiambre: los judรญos casi no tenemos, solo pastrรณn, asรญ que es un concepto que no estรก muy a mano de nosotros), ni con quรฉ se comรญa normalmente. A las empleadas domรฉsticas se les dice shikse; es un tรฉrmino despectivo pero no quiere decir ni โnegraโ ni โesclavaโ; significa โno judรญaโ (para un judรญo ortodoxo, esas son las รบnicas chicas no judรญas que se conoce). Tanto es asรญ que una noche mi mamรก se dio cuanta de que yo me morรญa de transgredir el shabat y jugar a ser normal le pidiรณ a la chica que trabajaba en mi casa que me sumara a una salida al cine que ella ha armado con dos amigas (veo que al menos no fue tan racista ni tan clasista mi infancia, ahora que pienso en esta historia). Creo que vimos una pelรญcula de Adam Sandler y de lo que estoy segurรญsimo es de que comimos pochoclo, porque nunca antes habรญa probado pochoclo en el cine. Estaba fascinada con la intrepidez de Juana y sus amigas, la manera en que se movรญan entre las cosas, comรญan y charlaban y se subรญan a un colectivo y hablaban de un hombre o de otro.
Aunque la pelรญcula me haya interesado menos que todo lo demรกs , el segundo motivo del documental que se repite tambiรฉn en mi vida es la importancia de la cultura en su sentido mรกs amplia que se puede imaginar, desde las novelas de Cris Morena, un libro de Vargas Llosa que encontraba en la biblioteca del living o las entradas de sexualidad de la Enciclopedia britรกnica, todo que te habla del mundo mรกs allรก de tu casa y de tu barrio te lo devorรกs con pasiรณn; lo que habla de sexo, ante todo, sรญ, pero tambiรฉn de amistades, de plata, de trabajo, de casas, de ropa, de comida. Uno de los pibes cuenta en el documental que descubrir Wikipedia fue unos de los mejores momentos de su vida. Yo ya era un poco mรกs grande que el chico del documental cuando Wikipedia se hizo conocida en Argentina, pero entendรญ perfectamente el vรฉrtigo de, de pronto, sentir que se te abrรญa una secreta a todo eso de lo que hablan los demรกs, una ventana, una ventana en la que podรฉs espiar lo que no entendiste de una conversaciรณn sin que nadie te mire, asรญ no se dan cuenta de que no sabรฉs quรฉ es una morcilla o una tanga.
Decรญa que la saquรฉ barata: en primer lugar, porque mi comunidad no era tan cerrada como la de los chicos de One of Us. En la escuela tenรญamos enseรฑanza oficial (aunque no educaciรณn sexual) y a casi todos mis amigos y a mรญ nos dejaban ver televisiรณn e ir al cine. En mi casa ademรกs, la educaciรณn y la cultura eran muy importantes, una tradiciรณn askenazi, supongo: aunque mi mamรก no era โmuy del palo de arteโ, le importaba llevarnos a museos y fomentarnos el hรกbito de la lectura, y no controlaba demasiado lo que leรญamos. En algรบn sentido era un arma de doble filo. Algunos chicos tenรญan muy en claro que eso que veรญamos en la ficciรณn era un exotismo en relaciรณn a nuestra propia vida. โNo es para nosotrosโ, decรญa una amiga de mi hermana sobre la vida que hacรญan las chicas de novelitas de Cris Morena, con mucha naturalidad y sin explicar por quรฉ. Algunas nos veรญamos seducidas por ese otro universo, que sucedรญa en barrios por los que pasรกbamos, frente a los shoppings que conocรญamos, a la vez imposiblemente lejos. Por esos azares de la vida, terminรฉ llegando ahรญ. Mi papรก falleciรณ cuando yo, que soy la mayor, tenรญa 5 aรฑos y, a medida que con mis hermanos fuimos creciendo, mi mamรก nos empezรณ a permitir relajar las normas, puertas adentro de casa al menos, aunque manteniendo ciertas apariencias en el Once. Con los aรฑos abandonamos tambiรฉn eso. Supongo que no era sostener tantas reglas haciendo malabares con tres nenas tan chicas: no sรฉ como nos hubieran entretenido sin encender la televisiรณn en shabat cuando mi mamรก hacia guardia todos los sรกbados.
Tampoco nadie tenรญa ganas de prohibirnos mรกs cosas que era estrictamente necesario negarnos; yo no me daba cuenta pero los primeros aรฑos de viudez de mi mamรก fueron emocional y econรณmicamente. Para cuando empecรฉ a entender algo ya estรกbamos mejor, en ambos sentidos, y con un pie entero afuera de la religiรณn.
Aunque venรญamos saliendo de a poco, yo fui pionera en la familia cuando le dije a mi mamรก que querรญa ir a โun buen colegioโ, de esos que te preparan bien para ir a la universidad, y ella accediรณ. En eso tambiรฉn tuve suerte; no necesitรฉ pelearme a muerte con nadie ni fugarme de mi casa para hacer una vida nueva y convertirme en otra persona. Fui la primera que probรณ el jamรณn, que tuvo amigos no judรญos y que se comprรณ una musculosa para usar en la calle, sin saquito ni nada. Tampoco fue todo risas: mi mamรก se puso a llorar una vez que le dije que querรญa ir a un baile de egresados de Guadalupe, donde una compaรฑera mรญa terminaba la primaria. โYo entiendo que vayas a un colegio laico, pero ยฟa bailar cumbia con los chicos de la parroquia?โ, decรญa como en una parodia de รญdishe mame, pero con tono melodramรกtico de pelรญcula italiana. A ese baile no fui, per terminรณ siendo mendos grave de lo que me pareciรณ en ese momento.
Cuando lleguรฉ al nuevo colegio, entonces, me encontrรฉ con un abismo: era evidente que yo no conocรญa las reglas de nada. Habรญa acumulado un cierto bagaje de conocimiento, creรญa yo, pero estaba basado enteramente en las ficciones que lograba consumir, y ahora empezaba a dudar de quรฉ tanto me podrรญa servir para manejarme en el mundo real: ยฟdesde quรฉ edad habรญa que decir que te dabas besos en la boca? ยฟQuรฉ tipo de interacciรณn hay que sostener con los varones en la vida diaria? ยฟA los varones se los saluda siempre con beso o sรณlo si los conocรฉs? ยฟEl uso de minifaldas debe administrarse con cuidado o puedo usarlas todos los dรญas? ยฟPerder la virginidad antes del matrimonio es tan comรบn como en las pelรญculas? Estas son preguntas que yo me hacรญa constantemente, de forma explรญcita, cada vez que me tocaba participar en una conversaciรณn o ir a una fiesta de cumpleaรฑos de mis nuevas amigas o, sencillamente, cuando estaba sola en casas y tenรญa un rato para pensar y organizar mis ideas sobre el tema. Aclaro, por si no es obvio, que el mundo del que yo venรญa (del que yo vengo) todas estas cuestiones tenรญan una respuesta รบnica. Los judรญos ortodoxos tenemos reglas claras para todo: la comida, la ropa, el modo de conducirse con el sexo opuesto, incluso acerca de cรณmo administrar la menstruaciรณn. La mayorรญa estรกn escritas en alguna parte de la Torรก o del Talmud y, si existe alguna duda, se consulta con el rabino, que seguro tiene algรบn precedente como respuesta. En el mundo que yo empezaba a habitar, la clase media urbana del siglo XXI, no habรญa libros sagrados; y, empecรฉ a pensar, tal vez tampoco hubiera demasiadas reglas.
From: The End of Love: To Love and to Fuck.ย 2019.
My mother, my sisters and I grew up in an orthodox Jewish community, in what is known as modern orthodoxy. In Buenos Aires, it is possible to see many people like us; girls who keep their heads covered but wear skirts made of jeans, men who donโt wear a large hat nor have โlittle rolls of hairโ on the side of their head but a beard and a kipah, yes. I was born in Once in 1989, and I lived there until I was 23, when I moved in with a friend. In metaphysical terms, I fortunately left early, but in another sense, nobody ever leaves. The Chassidic people in New York with their women covering the rear guard for them, surprise me, but not that much. My mama, who is a doctor and continues to practice in the neighborhood, has patients like that, more or less like that. Almost all my girlfriends from primary school are married and are on their second, third or fourth child. The girlfriends of my younger sisters, too.
In a documentary called One of Us two men and a woman my age relate how difficult the Hassidic community to which they belonged, the same one I saw in New York. made it for them to leave,ย I got out relatively easily, but watching the documentary on Netflix, I identified with what they were saying, particularly with two themes told in the stories that were sort of the same thing. The first is the absolute ignorance of what was happening in the โreal world.โ At times, it is difficult to explain how, although they live there, in an enormous city, in the midst of everyone, in the midst of whatever, even when they have a television or Internet (I did, the folks in the documentary didnโt), it is as if they lived on another planet. Until I was 12, not only had I never tasted ham; I didnโt even know what it looked like, if it resembled pork or a steak (I never realized that it was a type of cold cuts. We Jews hardly had them, only pastrami, so it isn’t a concept very familiar to us), or what you normally ate with it. The domestic employees were called shikses; itโs a disparaging term, but it doesnโt mean โSlavโ or โBlackโ: it means โnon-Jewโ (for an orthodox Jew, they are the only non-Jewish girls that they know.) So much so, that one evening my mama realized that I was dying to break the shabbat and play at being normal, she asked the girl who worked in my house to add me on to a trip to the movies that she had arranged with two friends (I can see that at least my childhood wasnโt so racist or classist, now that I think about this story.) I believe that we saw a movie by Adam Sandler and what I am absolutely certain of is that we ate popcorn, because I had never before tasted popcorn at the movies. I was fascinated with the intrepidness of Juana and her friends, the manner in which they moved among things, ate and chatted and went up on the bus and spoke about one man or another.
Although the movie interested me less than everything else, the second theme of the documentary that was repeated in my life was the importance of culture in the broadest sense imaginable, from the novels of Chris Morena, a book by Vargas Llosa that I found in the living room library or the entries about sexuality in the Encyclopedia Britannica, everything that tells you about the world beyond home and your neighborhood, you devour passionately, that about sex, more than anything else, yes, but also of friendships, money and work, housing, clothing, food. One of the kids in the documentary tells how discovering Wikipedia was one of the best moments of his life. I was a little bit older than the boy in the documentary when Wikipedia became known in Argentina, but I understood perfectly the vertigo of, suddenly, feeling that a secret was made clear for you about what all the others were talking about, a window, a window through which you could spy on what you didnโt understand in a conversation without anyone seeing you, in that way, they didnโt realize that you didnโt know what a blood sausage or a thong is.
I said that I got out without much trouble: in the first case, because my community was not as closed as that of the kids in One of Us. In school, we followed the official curriculum (though not sex education), and almost all my friends and I were permitted to watch television and go to the movies. In my home, moreover, education and culture were very important, an Ashkenazi tradition, I suppose: although my mother wasnโt โa great fan of art,โ it was important to her to take us to museums and foment in us the habit of reading, and she didnโt regulate too much what we read. In some way, it was a double-edged sword. Some kids understood very clearly that what we saw in fiction was an exotic oddity in relation to our own lives. โItโs not for us,โ saidย a friend of my sister about the life that girls had of the little novels by Cris Morena, very naturally and without explaining why. Some of us were seduced by this other universe, what was happening in the neighborhoods that we went through, in front of the shopping malls that we knew, though, at the same time impossibly distant. By one of those fateful events in life, I ended up getting there. My papa died when I, the oldest was 5, ย and, while my sisters and I were growing up, my mama began to allow us to ease the rules, behind closed doors at home, at least, maintaining certain appearances in Once. As the years passed, we abandoned that too. I suppose that it wasnโt possible to sustain so many rules, juggling three little girls: I donโt how they could have understood not turning on the television on shabbat when my mama was on duty every Saturday. Neither did she wish to prohibit us more things than those that were strictly necessary to deny us; I didnโt understand that the first years of widowhood were emotionally and economically difficult for my mama. When I began to understand a bit, we were already better off, in both ways, and a big step away from the religion.
Although we continued leaving little by little, I was the pioneer in the family when I said to my mama that I wanted to go to a โgood high schoolโ, one of those that prepare you to go to the university, and she agreed. In this too I was lucky. I didnโt have to fight hammer and tongs with anyone or flee my home to make a new live and become a convert myself into another person. I was the first to taste ham, to have friends who werenโt Jewish and who bought a sleeveless shirt to wear in the street without a small jacket or anything else on top of it. It wasnโt all smiles; my mama began to cry when I told her that I wanted to go to a dance for the graduates of Guadalupe, where a friend of mine was completing elementary school. โI can understand that you go to a secular high school, but to dance the cumbia with kids from the parishโ, she said in a parody of a Yiddishe mame, but with a melancholic tone of an Italian movie. I didnโt go to that dance, which turned out to be less serious that it appeared at that moment.
When I arrived at the new high school, then, I found myself with an abysm of knowledge: it was evident that I didnโt know the rules for anything. I had accumulated a certain baggage of knowledge, I believed, but it was entirely based on the fiction that I had succeeded in consuming, and now I began to doubt that all of that would serve me so well in managing in the real world: at what age was it necessary to say that you would kiss on the mouth? What type of interaction did you have to maintain with the boys on a daily basis? Do you greet all the boys with a kiss or only those that you know? Should you be careful about wearing your miniskirts or can you use them every day? Is it as common o lose your virginity before you are married as in the movies? These are questions that I asked myself constantly, explicitly, every time that it was my turn to participate in a conversation or a birthday party of my new girlfriends, or simply, when I was alone at home and had time to think and organize my thoughts on the subject. Let me clarify, if it is not already obvious, that in the world from which I came (from that which I come) all these questions had one and only answer. We orthodox Jews have clear rules for everything: food, clothing, how to behave with the opposite sex, even how to take care of menstruation. The majority of these rules are written in some part of the Torah or the Talmud, and if any doubt exists, you consult with the rabbi, who certainly has some precedent for his answer. In the world that I was beginning to inhabit, the urban middle class of the XXI century, there were no secret books, I began to think, perhaps there also werenโt too many rules either.
Arminda Ralesky naciรณ en Buenos Aires, descendiente de padres llegados a la Argentina de Kiev, Rusia. Fue docente especializada en educaciรณn preescolar y poesรญa estudios terciarios de periodismo y psicologรญa social, asรญ como metodologรญa teatral, cinematogrรกfico y plรกstico Obtuvo varios premios por su labor literario, incluyendo el Premio internacional de Poesรญa โFernando Jenoโ de Mรฉxico. Su obra era muy leรญdo en Buenos Aire y a menudo presentado con acompaรฑamiento musical.
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Arminda Ralesky (1924-2006) was born in Buenos Aires, descendant of parents who came to Argentina from Kiev, Russia. She was a teacher specialized in preschool education and poetry, tertiary studies in journalism and social psychology, as well as theatrical, cinematographic and plastic methodology. He obtained several awards for his literary work, including the international “Fernando Jeno” Poetry Prize in Mexico. He work was very popular in Buenos Aires and often presented with musical accompaniment.
Osvaldo Romberg, hijo de inmigrantes judรญos, estudiรณ arquitectura en la Universidad de Buenos Aires. Enseรฑรณ arte en las Universidades de Buenos Aires, Cรณrdoba, Puerto Rico y Tucumรกn hasta 1973, cuando emigrรณ a Israel, enseรฑando en la Academia de Artes Bezalel y Diseรฑo por 20 aรฑos. Mรกs tarde, enseรฑรณ en la Academia de Bellas Artes de Pensilvania en Filadelfia. Durante las รบltimas cinco dรฉcadas y en los cinco continentes, Romberg ha producido trabajos que abordan cuestiones de anรกlisis del color, interpretaciรณn y representaciรณn del arte y la historia del arte, y las de pinturas histรณricas famosas para investigar las convenciones polรญticas y sociales de mirar y ver. Romberg se desempeรฑรณ como profesor en la Universidad Ben-Gurion, Israel, donde fundรณ un centro para cine experimental, video y arte mediรกtico. Ha exhibido ampliamente como artista en instituciones como el Kunsthistorisches Museum, Viena; Kunstmuseum, Bonn; Museo Ludwig, Colonia; Museo del Sudo, Tokio; El museo de Israel, Jerusalรฉn; El museo judรญo, Nueva York; la XLI Bienal de Venecia, Pabellรณn de Israel; El museo de arte de Filadelfia; Museo de Arte Moderno, Buenos Aires; y el Van Abbemuseum, Eindhoven.
Osvaldo Romberg, the son of Jewish immigrants, studied architecture at the University of Buenos Airesย Heย taught art at the Universities of Buenos Aires, Cรดrdoba, Puerto Rico and Tucumรกn until 1973, when he emigrated to Israel, teaching at the Bezalel Academy of Arts and Design for 20 years. Later, he taught at the Pennsylvania Academy of the Fine Arts in Philadelphia. Over the past five decades and on five continents, Romberg has producedย work that tackles questions of analysis of color, interpretation and representation of art and art history, and those of famous historical paintings to investigate the political and social conventions of looking and seeing.ย Romberg served as a professor at the Ben-Gurion University, Israel, where he a founded a center for experimental cinema, video and media art. He has exhibited widely as an artist at institutions including the Kunsthistorisches Museum, Vienna; Kunstmuseum, Bonn; Ludwig Museum, Cologne; Sudo Museum, Tokyo; The Israel Museum, Jerusalem; The Jewish Museum, New York; the XLI Venice Biennial, Israel Pavilion; The Philadelphia Museum of Art; the Museum of Modern Art, Buenos Aires; and the Van Abbemuseum, Eindhoven.
Mario Szichman naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1945, llegรณ a Caracas en 1967. Regresรณ a su ciudad natal en 1971 y, en 1975, volviรณ a Venezuela para quedarse por cinco aรฑos mรกs. Se enamorรณ de Venezuela y su compromiso con el paรญs estuvo vivo su muerte. En 1980, tras ganar el Premio de Literatura Ediciones del Norte de New Hampshire, Estados Unidos, por su novela A las 20:25 la seรฑora entrรณ en la inmortalidad, viajรณ a Estados Unidos, junto con su esposa Laura Corbalรกn. Se residenciaron en Nueva York, allรญ trabajรณ para la Associated Press y como corresponsal del periรณdico Tal Cual. Su obra: sus novelas histรณricas, seis de ellas reunidas en dos series: โLa trilogรญa del mar dulceโ formada por La verdadera crรณnica falsa, Los judรญos del Mar Dulce y A las 20:25 la seรฑora entrรณ en la inmortalidad, novelas querelatan las peripecias de una familia judรญa que trata de reinventarse a fin de ser aceptada en la sociedad argentina y โLa trilogรญa de la patria bobaโ, conformada por Los Papeles de Miranda, Las dos muertes del general Simรณn Bolรญvar y Los aรฑos de la guerra a muerte, novelas que narran las peripecias de los prรณceres de la independencia venezolana. Luego escribiรณ La regiรณn vacรญa, sobre los atentados a las torres gemelas, cuya trama tiene como soporte una serie de crรณnicas que estuvo escribiendo a partir de los acontecimientos ocurridos el 9 de septiembre de 2001.
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Mario Szichman was born in Buenos Aires in 1945, arrived in Caracas in 1967. He returned to his hometown in 1971 and, in 1975, returned to Venezuela to stay for five more years. He fell in love with Venezuela and his commitment to the country was alive his death. In 1980, after winning the Northern New Hampshire Editions Literature Prize, United States, for her novel At 20:25 the lady entered immortality, traveled to the United States, along with his wife Laura Corbalรกn. They resided in New York, where he worked for the Associated Press and as a correspondent for the newspaper Tal Cual. Her work: her historical novels, six of them brought together in two series: “The Sweet Sea Trilogy” formed by The True False Chronicle, The Jews of the Sweet Sea and At 20:25 the lady entered into immortality, novels that relate the vicissitudes of a Jewish family that tries to reinvent itself in order to be accepted in Argentine society and “The trilogy of the silly homeland”, made up of Los Papeles de Miranda, The two deaths of General Simรณn Bolรญvar and The years of the war a death, novels that narrate the adventures of the heroes of Venezuelan independence. Then he wrote The Empty Region, about the attacks on the Twin Towers, whose plot is supported by a series of chronicles that he was writing based on the events of September 9, 2001.
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“Los judรญos de la mar dulce”un fragmento
El primer dรญa de navegaciรณn de los Pechof vieron la pelรญcula titulada โArgentina. Tierra de Promisiรณnโ. La pantalla habรญa sido dividida en cuatro partes, como un escudo de armas, y se veรญan trigales, vacas de perfil, barcos filmados desde abajo para que sus proas fueran vertiginosas, y una familia compuesta por madre, hijo, hija y perrito juguetรณn, mirando un sol radiante.
Los cuatro eran gente lindo, y alegre, y tenรญan la misma cara. La diferencia entre el hijo y el padre se debรญa al pelo pintado de gris al pelo pintado de blanco y las arrugas sonrientes en el entrecejo y en las comisuras de los labios.
En el paรญs que habรญan preparado a gilada inmigrante, no habรญa indios ni flechas envenenadas, ni selvas llenas de tigres y caimanes, ni mugre, ni casas viejas, ni Guardias Blancas, ni miserables, petisos, gordos, pรกjaros , of antisemitismo. Ese mundo tenรญa la tersura satinada de las pรกginas de โEl Hogarโ, la guita crecรญa en los รกrboles, y los inmigrantes se hacรญan domadores extraordinarios, ante los ojos primero burlones y luego asombrados de criollos que los invitaban a tomar un matecito con โVenga, paisano, se lo ha ganado en buena leyโ. Todos subรญan en el escalafรณn y con el pasado borrado por la falta de antecedentes, un soldado se convertรญa en mariscal, lo albaรฑiles en inyenieri y las punguitas en ladrones de guante blanco. En esa Argentina imaginarรญa la gente que hablaba de tรบ, los burros se llaman jumentos. Los limosas eran รณbolos, los pobres usaban ropas remendadas pero pulcras, los grandes hombres nacรญan en humilde cuna, los padres se la pasan llevando a sus hijos a los desfiles para emocionarse al paso de los granaderos, nuestro amigo el policรญa se dedicaba a cruzar viejecitas, los niรฑos hablaban en difรญcil, los sociedades de los fifรญs eran benemรฉritas instituciones, las distinguidas damas guardaban cama, los torneos de canasta tenรญan siempre lรบcidos contornos y la gente se morรญa de mentira.
***
Los Pechof viajaron primero hacia el puro desierto amarillo y reconstruyeron el rompecabezas de un pasado del que querรญan adueรฑarse para liquidar el desarraigo. Se pusieron en la lรญnea de partida del aรฑo mil ochocientos diez y salieron por devorarse los aรฑos que los separaron de los goim, de sus pitos intactos, de su genealogรญa perpetuada en retratos de รณleo de Pueyrredรณn, Pellegrini o Morel; de sus generaciones de parientes generales, jueces o diputados, de sus abuelas duras, de facciones angulosas que se enfrentan a las hordas unitarios o federales, de ese idioma que ya habรญa sido manoseado por antepasados en cuarta o quinta generaciรณn, y les habรญa sido donado junto con los gestos tranquilos y despectivos del que se siente dueรฑo del poder, tratando de aรฑadir a esa casta de tipos grandotes, corajudos, vergalargas, que extendรญan las fronteras, o se la pasaban bien en Parรญs de pura joda, ya victoriosos, ya desplazados, pero siempre dueรฑos de su tierra; el tรญmido recuerdo de un bisabuelo que se perdรญa en la memoria apenas subรญa a un barco para irse a Palestina llevando como รบnico tesoro, unos tfilin escritos por un discรญpulo de Rashi, y unos antepasados de barba larga, trencitas en los sienes, shlapques redondo y nariz ganchuda, que buscaban con desesperaciรณn cualquier tipo de barba rubia y ojos azules para convertirlo en el meyiaj (meรญsas).
Tuvieron que apoderarse de una historia ajena, llena de mainzes raros. Los hรฉroes se achicaban cuando terminaba la guerra de independencia y se convertรญan en caudillos sedientos de sangre. Los ejรฉrcitos libertadores que habรญan mezclado su banderas en la lucha contra el godo, recogรญan sus trofeos y sus muertos, y se iban a sus paรญses a formar montoneras anรกrquicas. La gloria era reemplazada por la ambiciรณn y el renunciamiento por apetitos inconfesables. Los guerreros redujeron sus estatura y arruinaron sus perfiles, bajรกndose del caballo donde inmortalizaban sus proclamas y cubriรฉndose de barbas amenazantes. Hasta el tiempo se modificaba, y el cruce de los Andes ocupaba en los libros de historia el mismo espacio que el gobierno de Rosas.
Los Pechof tomaron partido por el bando de los vencedores y siguieron la lรญnea Mayo-Caseros, terminando hechos unos antiperonistas que invitaban al almirante Rojas a las fiestas de la Daia.
[3] In Argentine political history: the Revolution of May, 1810 and the Battle of Caseros in 1853, when Rosas was defeated inaugurated the modern Argentine nation, according to the conservative and neo-liberal point of view. That is not accepted by the popular sectors.
[4] Almirante Rojas, vice-presidente de la golpe militar que derrocรด a Perรณn en 1955 a el mรกs sangriante de los que intervinieron of the military coup, autor de muchos fusilamientos de peronistas.
[5] Daia, el liderazgo de la comunidad judรฎa que se juntรณ con los anti-peronistas that en aquel entoincs. Dicho con ironรฎa para seรฑalar el “ambiente” de la novela–esos judรฎos imigrantes como los Petchof que querรญa sre–medio cristiano y asimilado, igual a otros argentinos y aceptados por los que mandan.
The first day on board, the Pechoff family saw the movie, โArgentina. Promised Land.โ The screen had been divided in four parts, like a coat of arms, and showed wheat fields, cows in profile, ships filled from below so that their prow were dizzying and a family composed to mother, son, daughter and playful little dog, looking a radiant sun.
The four were good happy people, and they the same face. The difference between the son and the father depended on the hair dyed grey or hair dyed white and the smiling wrinkles on the forehead and the corners of the lips.
In the country that had provided the easily-fooled immigrant, there were no Indians or poisoned arrows, or jungles full of tigers and crocodiles or filth or miserable people o small guys, fat guys or anti-Semitism. That world had the satiny smoothness of the pages of the middle-class โHome Journal,โ the dough grew on trees, and the immigrants became excellent buckaroos, before the eyes of the at first scoffing and then amazed eyes of the locals who invited them later on to try to take a bit of mate with a โCome on over, โpaisano,โ my friend, youโve truly earned it.โ Everyone rose in social standing and with the past erased along with its lack of precedents , a soldier became a marshal, the bricklayers in โinyenieri,โ engineers and, the pickpockets in white gloved criminals. In the imaginary Argentina, people spoke to โyou, friend,โ the burros are called donkeys. The alms were donations, the poor wore mended but beautiful clothing, the great men were born in humble cradles, the fathers spent their time bringing their children to parades to excite them with the passing of grenadiers, our friend the policeman dedicated themselves to helping little old ladies cross the street, the children spoke with tricky words, the societies of filthy rich were meritorious institutions, the distinguished ladies kept to bed, the canasta tournaments were always fairly played, and the peopled died of lying.
***
The Pechofs traveled first toward the pure yellow desert and reconstructed the jigsaw puzzle of a past of which they wanted to take hold of to sort out their position in it. The aligned themselves with the party of 1810 and set out to devour the years that separated them from the goyim, from their intact pricks, of their genealogy of oil portraits of Pueyrredรณn, Pellegrini or Morel, of generations of relatives who were generals, judges or deputies, of their tough grandmothers, of angular features that confront the Unitarian or Federalist hordes,[1]of that language that had been embellished by ancestors of the fourth or fifth generation, which they had been given together with serene and derogatory gestures of those who feel to be the owners of power, trying to add to this caste of huge, valiant, big-dicked, who extended the frontiers or who enjoyed themselves in Paris, partying all the time, already victorious, already supplanted, but always owners of their land; the timid recollection of a great-grandfather that was being lost in memory as soon as they went on to a ship to go to Palestine, carrying as his only treasure, son โtefillimโ phylacteries written by a disciple of Rashi, and some ancestors with long beards, little curls on their temples, rounded black hats and very hooked noses, who desperately looked for any sort of blond beard and blue eyes to convert him into โmeyiah,โ the Messiah.
They had to take on a foreign history, full of โmetzias,โ strange stories. The heroes shrank when the War of Independence ended and they became blood-thirsty caudillos. The armies of liberation that had mixed their flags during the fight against the Spanish, collected their trophies and their dead and went on to form anarchical gangs. Glory was replaced by ambition and sacrifice for uncontrollable appetites. The warriors reduced their stature and ruined their profiles, dismounting their horses where they immortalized their proclamations and covering themselves with threatening beards. Even time was modified, the crossing of the Andes occupied in the history books the same space as the government of Rosas.[2]
The Pechofs took the side of the winners and followed the line Mayo-Caseres,[3] ending up as anti-Peronists who invited Admiral Rojas[4] to the parties hosted by the DAIA.[5]
[3] In Argentine political history: the Revolution of May, 1810 and the Battle of Caseros in 1853, when Rosas was defeated inaugurated the modern Argentine nation, according to the conservative and neo-liberal point of view. It is not accepted by the popular sectors.
[4] Admiral Rojas, vice-president of the military coup that overthrew Perรดn in 1955 and the most bloody of the military who intervened also author of the execution of many Peronists
[5] DAIA, the official Jewish Community leadership that joined the anti-Peronsit forces at that time. Said with irony to signal the โatmosphereโ of the novelโthose immigrant Jews like the Pechofs wanted to beโhalf Christian and assimilated, equal to other Argentines,accepted by those who lead.
ย Manuel Kantor (1911- 1983), o โMenkeโ, ex jugador de voleibol que brillรณ en la Selecciรณn argentina y fue medalla de bronce en los Juegos Olรญmpicos de Seรบl โ88. Naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1911, viviรณ tambiรฉn en Rรฎo de Janeiro y en Bahรญa, en Brasil, y muriรณ en Jerusalรฉn, en 1983. Fue un gran pintor, dibujante, retratista, caricaturista polรญtico y muralista que ademรกs hizo de sus viajes un estilo de vida nรณmade que contrastaba con su aspecto de dandy. El judaรญsmo siempre estuvo presente en la vida de Kantor, desde la ortodoxia de sus padres de origen ruso, quienes llegaron al paรญs en 1906. Hizo el boceto para la composiciรณn del friso del mural de Tobรญas el Lechero, un relato popular de Scholem Aleijem, reconocido autor de la literatura idish. Tambiรฉn hizo pinturas sobre Tel Aviv y Eilat, paisajes en el que el artista solรญa inspirarse durante su estadรญa en Israel.
_______________________________________
Manuel Kantor (1911- 1983), or “Menke”, a former volleyball player who shone in the Argentine National Team and won a bronze medal at the Seoul Olympics ’88. He was born in Buenos Aires in 1911, he also lived in Rio de Janeiro and Bahia, in Brazil, and died in Jerusalem, in 1983. He was a great painter, draftsman, portraitist, political cartoonist and muralist who also made his travels a style of nomadic life that contrasted with his dandy appearance. Judaism was always present in the life of Kantor, from the orthodoxy of his parents of Russian origin, who came to the country in 1906. He did a sketch for the composition of the frieze on the mural of Tobรญas el Lechero, a popular account of Scholem Aleichem, renowned author of Yiddish literature. He also did paintings about Tel Aviv and Eilat, landscapes that inspired the artist during his stay in Israel.
______________________________________
Pinturas de Bahรญa,Brasil/Paintings of Bahia, Brazil
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Un lago en Brasil/A Lake in Brazil
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Pinturas de La Boca, una vecindad en Buenos Aires/Paintings of La Boca in Buenos Aires
Mina Weil naciรณ en Montefalcone, Italia en 1926. En 1936 a causa de la persecuciรณn fascista contra los judรญos, su familia emigrรณ a la Argentina. Con el esposo Alfredo, viviรณ un tiempo en Nueva York y en Londres. En Buenos Aires, nacieron sus cuatro hijos, plantรณ varios รกrboles y, ya en Israel donde se radicรณ a fines de 1989, escribiรณ cuentos y esta novela. Fue la presidente de la Asociaciรณn Israelรญ de Escritores en Lengua Castellana, รณrgano representativo ante la Federaciรณn de Escritores de Israel.
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Mina Weil was born in Montefalcone, Italy in 1926. In 1936, due to Fascist persecution against the Jews, her family emigrated to Argentina. With husband Alfredo, she lived for a time in New York and London. In Buenos Aires, where her four children were born, she planted several trees and, then in Israel where she settled in late 1989, she wrote stories and this novel. She was the president of the Israeli Association of Writers in the Spanish Language, part of the Federation of Writers of Israel. _______________________________________________________________
De:/From:ย Mina Weil.ย El รบltimo dรญa.ย Buenos Aires: Acervo Cultural Editores. 1999.
Fatรญdico fue para los judรญos de Italia el aรฑo 1938. La demencia hitleriana atravesรณ los Alpes. Sin encontrar obstรกculo, anidรณ en el delirante del fascismo, dando publicamente a luz una Italia racista.
La juderรญa italiana fue, a travรฉs de la palabra escrita, vapuleada, burlada, arrastrado, en el barro de la ignominia. La agresiones impresas se tornaron diarias.
Estรกbamos atrapados, zarandeados dentro de una burbuja que rodaba hacia destino ignota, se agrandaban y podรญa estallar en cualquier momento.
***
Esperรกbamos ansiosamente noticias de papรก. Por razones obvias iba a escribir a casa de Norma. La carta llegรณ. Con su letra menuda y redonda papรก habรญa llenado varias hojas. Por unos dรญas cambiรณ el color de nuestra vida y se suavizรณ un poco el entrecejo de mamรก,
โBuenos Aires es bellรญsimaโ, escribรญa. โSe respiraba libertad hasta por los poros. La gente es amable y aparentemente hay abundancia. En cualquier restaurante un pobre recibe, sin siquiera pedirlo, un plato grande de sopa y pan fresco. El pan es exquisito. Hay abundancia de trigo. Argentina es el granjero del mundoโ. .
***
Ya no faltaba mucho tiempo. Tenรญamos fecha de partida. 12 de diciembre con vapor โOceaniaโ.
Mamรก astutamente, hizo correr el rumor de que salรญamos desde el puerto de Gรฉnova. El puerto era otro. Lo sabรญamos solamente ella y yo.
Los dรญas huyeron y robaron mi รบltimo octubre italiano.
***
Habรญa estado guardado, durante aรฑos, en un estante del lavadero. Mamรก sacรณ con mucho cuidado la funda empolvada de la pequeรฑa y resquebrajada valija de cartรณn, reprimiรณ un estornudo, y muy lentamente levantรณ la tapa.
Un talit con penetrante olor a lana vieja, gastado y amarillento.
Un Sidur de hojas tan delgadas que se hacรญan polvo al tocarlas.
Un Majzor un tanto en mejor estado.
El libro Der Judenstaat de Theodor Herzl y un enorme cantidad de folletos sionistas.
Un resto de vela de Havdalรก envuelto en un paรฑuelo que alguna vez fue blanco.
Una gorra de gabardina gris con el forro deshecho.
–Es aquรญ donde guardรณ tu padre su sueรฑo jaluziano.
Fue colocando cada cosa tal cual la habรญa encontrado. Lo hizo con delicadeza con que se toca un flor que se va perdiendo sus pรฉtalos.
–Espera aquรญ. Enseguida vuelvoโme dijo.
A los pocos minutos volviรณ con dos candelabros de plata que usรกbamos en Shabat y papel de diario.
Se arrodillรณ, arrugรณ un poco el papel. Envolviรณ cada candelabro con una hoja.
Eran las primeras pรกginas de las ediciones de la maรฑana de los diarios del 2 y del 3 de septiembre.
–No se darรกn cuenta que son los diarios que salieron con el decreta de las leyes raciales. ยกHay que guardarlos! Serรก tu misiรณn, Anna, mostrarles algรบn dรญa a tus hijos Les contarรกโSus ojos cรกlidos y acuosos se clavaron en los mรญos para grabar el mensaje.
–No se si tendremos la capacidad de perdonar. ยกOlvidar jamรกs!โpronunciรณ este jamรกs con los dientes apretados y los puรฑos cerrados.
Ersillia tenรญa razรณn cuando dijo: โChiquita pero con la fuerza de un giganteโ.
La bisagra chirriรณ. Cerrรณ la valija. El clic de la cerradura oxidada guardรณ con el sueรฑo de mi papรก, tambiรฉn nuestra historia.
La envolviรณ en una toalla de lino blanca, como se viste un Sรฉfer Torรก. La colocรณ sobre la pila de sรกbanas y mantasโAquรญ hay lugar para tu violรญn–dijo.
La tarea de empacar seguรญa. No habรญa tiempo ni para lรกgrimas, ni para lamentos
***
Temido pero tambiรฉn ansiado, llegรณ el dรญa. Bajamos las seis persianas del departamento. Seis ojos cerrados que no nos verรญan partir.
Recorrimos los amplios cuartos desiertos y frรญos. Acariciamos sus paredes. Aspiramos por รบltima vez su aire, para no olvidar el aroma. โOlerรก a encierro si no lo habitan prontoโ, pensรฉ.
Ya รญbamos a bajar cuando mamรก de pronto, se golpeรณ la frente con una mano y exclamรณ: — ยกLa Mezuza! ยกCasi la olvidamos!โSacรณ de su cartera una pequeรฑa lima de uรฑas. Forcejeando un poco logrรณ sacar los dos clavitos. Fue un desgarro que sentimos en los mรกs profundo. La mezuzรก dejรณ su marca en la puerta de entrada. Serรก la seรฑal que grite: โ Sรฉpanse que aquรญ viviรณ un judรญoโ.
Bajamos la escalera. Despacio, muy despacio, palpando la tersura de la vieja madera del pasamanos.
Las piernas parecen no responder a la orden de marcha.
La cuerda que nos ata se estira. . .no se rompe todavรญa.
Una tijera invisible logra finalmente cortarla.
Los pies parecen ahora mรกs livianos. . .libres.
Una รบltima mirada hacia atrรกs. La casa no se mueve, soy yo la que se aleja.
La ciudad se esfuma. Ya es recuerdo de maรฑana.
Estamos en el camino de montaรฑa. Abajo estรก el mar. Trieste a la vista
***
Antes de subir a bordo, tuvimos que pasar por Aduana. Verificaron cuanto dinero llevรกbamos.
A mamรก le hicieron pasar a una habitaciรณn que parecรญa un consultorio mรฉdico, y cerraron la puerta.
Me encontrรฉ sola, desamparada, frente a una mujerona de guardapolvo blanco, que sin decir una palabra, desabrochรณ mi abrigo. Me lo sacรณ con brusquedad.
Yo estaba asustadรญsima. Metiรณ las manos en todos los bolsillos. Me hizo sacar los zapatos. Los revisรณ muy de cerca con sus ojos miopes. Me palpรณ por todos lados. No sรฉ quรฉ buscaba. Nada encontrรณ. Me hizo abrir la boca y sacar la lengua. Se la saquรฉ con fuerza y de buena gana.
–No me duele la gargantaโle dije secamente.
–ยฟTienes novio?
–No tengoโle contestรฉ. No quise, pero me puse colorada.
–Estรก bien. . .cuando salga tu mamรก, puedes irte.
Apretรณ mi brazo. Me detuvoโUn momento, seรฑoritaโdijo con su tono militarโno revisรฉ tu carterita. ยฟQuรฉ hay aquรญ?ย A ver. . . iba diciendo en voz alta lo que sacaba:ย Paรฑueloโฆlรกpiz, un libro de tapa roja. . . _–Lo abriรณ y preguntรณ con cierta ironรญa–: ยฟEs chino?–ยกNo! Contestรฉ enojadaโes hebreo. Es mi Libro de Oraciones. ยกNo lo toque!ย ยกDรฉmelo!โMe lo devolviรณ.
–Supongo que estรก bien โdijo, torciรณ la boca. Dio media vuelta. Fue a controlar a otra jovencita, seguramente tan asustada como yo.
Mamรก saliรณ abotonando su vestido. Estaba lรญvida. Apretaba fuertemente los labios. Seรฑal de que nunca contarรก.
For the Jews of Italy, 1938 was a fateful year. The Hitlerian madness crossed the Alps. Without encountering any obstacle, it nested the deliria of Fascism, publicly giving birth to a racist Italy.
Through the written word, The Jews of Italy were, beaten up, made fun of, dragged through the mud of disgrace. The printed aggressions became daily events.
We were trapped, shaken within a bubble that rolled toward an unknown destiny, increased in size and could explode at any moment.
***
We anxiously awaited news about Papa. For obvious reasons, he was going to write to Normaโs house. The letter arrived. With his small and round handwriting, Papa had filled several pages. For a few days, the color of our lives changed and Mamaโs brow softened.
โBuenos Aires is extremely beautifulโ, he wrote. โYou can smell freedom even through your pores. The people are friendly and apparently there is abundance. In every restaurant, a poor man, even without asking, is given a large bowl of soup and fresh bread. The bread is exquisite. There is an abundance of wheat. Argentina is the worldโs farm. . .โ
***
ย ย ย ย ย ย There wasnโt much time. We had a departure date. December 12 with the steamship Oceania.
Astutely, Mama started the rumor that we were leaving from the port of Genova. The real port was different. Only she and I knew.
For years, it had been kept on a shelf of the sink. With great care, Mama took out the dust covered case of the small and cracked cardboard case, held back a sneeze, and slowly raised the cover.
A talit with a penetrating smell of old wool, worn out and yellowed
A Sidur with pages so thin that they turn to dust when touched.
A Machzor in a bit better condition.
A book Der Judenstaat by Theodor Herzl and an enormous quantity of Zionist pamphlets.
The remainder if a Havdalah candle wrapped in a handkerchief that once was white.
A gray gaberdine cap with its lining torn.
“Here he kept his Zionist pioneer dreams alive.”
She was placing each thing just as she had found it. She did it with the delicacy with which you touch a flower that is losing its petals.
“Wait her. Iโll be right back,” she told me.
A few minutes later, she returned with two candelabras that we used on Shabat and pieces of newspaper.
She kneeled down, crumpled a bit of paper. She wrapped each candelabra with a sheet.
They were the first pages of the morning editions of the newspapers for the second and third of September.
“They wonโt notice that they are the newspapers that came out with the decree of the racial laws. We have to keep them! It will be your mission, Anna, to show them to your children. You will tell them your storyโHe warm and watery eyes fixed on mine to imprint the message.”
“I donโt know if we will have the capacity to forgive. To forget, never!โshe pronounced this never with her teeth clenched and her fists held tightly.
Ersilla was right when she said: โ A little on but with the strength of a giant.โ
The hinge squeaked. She closed the case. The click from the rusted lock kept not only my fatherโs dream, but also our history.
She wrapped it in a white linen towel, as you dress a Sefer Torah. She placed it on a pile of sheets and blanketsโThere is room here for your violinโshe said. The chore of packing continued. There was no time for tears of laments.
Feared but also longed-for, the day arrived. We lowered the six blinds of the apartment. Six eyes close that would not see us leave.
We went through the ample rooms, now deserted and cold. We caressed the walls. We breathed in for the last time its air, so not to forget its aroma. โIt will smell closed up, if they donโt soon live here.โ I thought.
We were already going down, when, suddenly, Mama, hit her head with a hand and exclaimed: –The Mezuzah! We almost forgot it!โShe took from her handbag a small nail file. By struggling a bit, she was able to remove the two little nails. It was a pain that we felt most profoundly. The mezuzah left its mark on the entry door. It will be the sign that yells out: โKnow that a Jew lived her.โ
We descended the stairs. Slowly, very slowly, touching the smoothness of the old wood of the handrails.
The legs seem not to respond to the order to march.
The cord that ties us, stretches. . . it doesnโt break yet.
An invisible scissors finally cut it,
The feet seemed lighter now. . .free.
A last look back. The house doesnโt move. Iโm the one who leaves.
The city fades away,
We are on the mountain road. The sea is below. Trieste can be seen.
***
Before embarking, we had to go through Customs. The checked on how much money we were carrying.
They made Mama go to a room that looked like a doctorโs office, and they closed the door.
I found myself alone, defenseless, in front of a large woman wearing a white smock, who without saying a word, unfastened my coat. She quickly took it away from me.
I was very scared. She put her hands in every pocket. She made me take off my shoes. She checked them over very carefully with her nearsighted eyes. She touched me everywhere. I donโt know what she was looking for. She didnโt find anything. She made me open my mouth and stick out my tongue. I stuck it out forcefully and willingly.
โI donโt have a sore throat. I said to her dryly.”
โDo you have a boyfriend?โ
โNo, I donโt.โ I didnโt want to, but I blushed.
โOkay, when your mother comes out, you can leave.โ She squeezed my arm. She stopped me. โOne moment, Miss,โ she said with her military tone of voice, โI didnโt check your little handbag. What do we have here? Letโs see.โ She repeated out loud each thing she took out: handkerchief, pencil, a book with a red cover. . .โ She opened it and asked with a certain irony: โIs it Chinese? โNo!โ I answered angrily, โItโs Hebrew. Itโs my Prayer Book. Donโt touch it! Give it to me!” She returned it to me.
โI suppose itโs alright,โ she said. She twisted her mouth. She turned around. She went over to check another little girl, surely as frightened as I.
Mama came out, buttoning her dress. She was livid. She squeezed her lips together. Signal that she would never tell what had happened.
Saรบl Yurkievich fue un poeta y crรญtico literario argentino. Naciรณ en 1931 de una familia de inmigrantes judรญos en La Plata, donde se educรณ y comenzรณ su carrera acadรฉmica. En la dรฉcada de 1950 se uniรณ al movimiento de vanguardia en Buenos Aires. La carrera de Yurkievich comenzรณ como erudito y crรญtico de la literatura latinoamericana. Su primer trabajo publicado, Valoraciรณn de Vallejo (1958), lo convirtiรณ en uno de los eruditos mรกs rigurosos de la poesรญa de Vallejo y de la literatura latinoamericana en general. Tres aรฑos despuรฉs, Yurkievich publicรณ su primera colecciรณn de poesรญa Volanda Linde Lumbre (1961). La mayor parte del trabajo de Yurkievich fue escrito en Francia, donde viviรณ desde 1968 trabajando como profesor de literatura latinoamericana en la Universidad de Parรญs VIII (Vincennes). En Parรญs mantuvo una fuerte amistad y vรญnculos literarios con escritores como Julio Cortรกzar, quien mรกs tarde lo nombrรณ su ejecutor literario. Yurkievich impartiรณ cursos y seminarios sobre literatura latinoamericana en varias universidades estadounidenses, incluidas Harvard, Chicago, Columbia, Johns Hopkins, UCLA, Maryland y Pittsburgh. Autor de una notable producciรณn poรฉtica basada en el experimentalismo de la dรฉcada de 1960, Yurkievich es conocido sobre todo por su vasta, lรบcida y esclarecedora obra crรญtica, que lo convirtiรณ en uno de los crรญticos literarios mรกs conocidos del mundo de habla hispana.
Saรบl Yurkievich was an Argentine poet and literary critic. He was born in 1931 in a Jewish immigrant family in La Plata, where he was educated and began his academic career. In the 1950s he joined the avant-garde movement in Buenos Aires. Yurkievich career started as a scholar and critic of Latin American literature. His first published work, Valoraciรณn de Vallejo (1958), made him one of the most rigorous scholars of Vallejoโs poetry, and of Latin American literature in general. Three years later, Yurkievich published his first poetry collection Volanda Linde Lumbre (1961). Most of Yurkievichโs work was written in France, where he lived since 1968 working as professor of Latin American literature at the Universitรฉ de Paris VIII (Vincennes). In Paris he maintained strong friendship and literary ties with writers such as Julio Cortรกzar, who later named him his literary executor. Yurkievich taught courses and seminars on Latin American literature in several American universities including Harvard, Chicago, Columbia, Johns Hopkins, UCLA, Maryland, and Pittsburgh. Author of a remarkable poetic production rooted in the experimentalism of the 1960s, Yurkievich is mostly renowned for his vast, lucid, and elucidating critical oeuvre, which turned him in one of the best known literary critics in the Spanish-speaking world.
“Segรบn Saรบl Yurkievich, en poesรญa cada cosa cuenta, especialmente en su tipo de poesรญa, donde cada poema crea su propia forma, donde no tenemos un marco poรฉtico familiar. Cada aspecto visual y auditivo es parte de un diseรฑo consciente: la disposiciรณn de las palabras en la pรกgina, la cadencia, el ritmo, el ritmo. . .calidades que asociamos con la mรบsica “. Cola Franzen, Traductora literaria
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“According to Saรบl Yurkievich, in poetry everything counts, especially in his type of poetry, where every poem creates its own form, where we do not have a familiar poetic framework. Every visual and aural aspect is part of a conscious design: the arrangement of the words on the page, the cadence, the rhythm, the pace. . .qualities we associate with music.” Cola Franzen, Literary Translator
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De:/From: Saรบl Yukievich. Background Noise/Ruido de fondo. trans. Cola Franzen. North Haven, CT,: Catbird Press, 2003.
Enrique Amster naciรณ en la provincia de Entre Rรญos y reside en la Capital desde los nueve aรฑos de edad. Estudiรณ construcciones en una escuela industrial y luego arquitectura en la Universidad de Buenos Aires. En tanto desarrollaba su actividad profesional diseรฑando inmuebles para vivienda, realizรณ estudios de postgrado en planificaciรณn fรญsica y regional. Participรณ en equipos interdisciplinarios pรบblicos y privados, formulando diversas propuestas de ordenamiento urbano especialmente en sectores de trรกnsito y transporte. Su vocaciรณn literaria se fue manifestando de a poco entre otros intentos expresivos: el dibujo y la pintura. Es a partir de la prรกctica en seminarios de periodismo y en talleres literarios, que la escritura fue elegida finalmente como el medio idรณneo que le permitiera decodificar los mensajes ocultos en su mundo interior. Ha publicado narrativa en antologรญas y una novela, Marcela y Judith, 1999 Retumbar de trenes, 1999.
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Enrique Amster was born in the province of Entre Rรญos and has lived in the Buenos Aires since he was nine years old. He studied construction at an industrial school and then architecture at the University of Buenos Aires. While developing his professional skills, designing real estate for housing, he completed postgraduate studies in physical and regional planning. He participated in public and private interdisciplinary teams, formulating various proposals for urban planning, especially in the transit and transport sectors. His literary vocation was gradually developed, while attempting other expressive areas: drawing and painting. From practice in journalism, seminars and literary workshops, he finally chose writing as the ideal medium that would allow him to decode the hidden messages in his inner world. He has published a narrative in anthologies and a novel, two novels Marcela and Judith, in 1999 andย Retumbar de trenes. 1999.
No negarรฉ que muchas veces tuve la tentaciรณn de llamarlo, buscarlo, saber algo de รฉl, escribirle, pero nunca lo hice: no pude. En el diario le destinaba, cada tanto, pรกginas enteras. Reconocรญa todo lo que habรญa influido en mรญ, provocando los cambios que vendrรญan despuรฉs; le adjudicaba haber desencadenado un severo auto-cuestionamiento de la identidad, lo cual me permitiรณ descubrir en mรญ un sentido de pertenencia a la cultura argentina que ignoraba poseer.
Y por encima de todo eso, ha sido Josรฉ Luis quien me ayudรณ a correr los velos de una sensualidad oculta detrรกs de mandatos y preceptos programados, organizados desde mi nacimiento o, quizรก, antes. Pensaba en Josรฉ Luis e imaginaba que ya se habรญa desvinculado afectivamente de mรญ.ย Que todo habรญa pasado. Que este โepisodioโ que vivimos fue definitiva y como yo lo sentรญ por aquel entonces, eso mismo, un episodio, u a pasiรณn fugaz, producto de la excitaciรณn de mi partida. Se habrรก mudadoโpensabaโy vivirรก con una pareja ya no en el desvencijado estudio de la calle Montevideo sino en alguno otro sitio de la ciudad: San Telmo o el Abasto o Balvanera.
Ya hacia tiempo que, en la Argentina, Carvallo habรญa asumido como ministro de Economรญa y, en el puesto de canciller, Menem habรญa nombrado a Di Tella. A estos cambios correspondรญa una serie de medidas enmarcadas, todas dentro de un ordenamiento que se conociรณ bajo la denominaciรณn de convertibilidad. Fui enterรกndome de los cambios que se producรญan a travรฉs de los diarios especializados que volvรญ a consultar en forma periรณdica: estabilizaciรณn y creciente inversiรณn en las actividades econรณmicas aunque con aumento de desocupaciรณn, consecuencia del ajuste fiscal, la privatizaciones y, en general, el achicamiento del estado.
Mรกs allรก de mi desconfianza y escepticismo hacia el peronismo y en especial hacia Menem, las medidas me parecรญan auspiciosas; no dejaba de asombrarme que se pudieran implementar en la democracia. Hubiera corrido, de ser posible, a comentar, debatir todos estos cambios con Josรฉ Luis; le exigirรญa cรณmo justificaba que un gobierno justicialista llevara adelante una transformaciรณn tan profunda, y ademรกs mediante instrumentos de inequรญvoco liberal.
El distanciamiento fรญsico de Marcos fue dรกndose en forma natural. Sin embargo, no tenรญa (Marcos tampoco) el coraje suficiente de dormir en camas separadas. Por otra parte, los viajes de Marcos eran bastante continuados. De una u otra forma, todo contribuรญa a que el deseo fuera apagรกndose por completo. En algรบn momento supuse que Marcos podรญa llegar a tener relaciones con otra mujer y estoโque en otros tiempos no era capaz de imaginar siquieraโme parecรญa razonable, comprensible. Y otra vez, como ya me habรญa sucedido dos aรฑos atrรกs, me fui deponiendo de a una nueva despedida. Era como si debiera inexorablemente y, por mi condiciรณn de judรญa, experimentar el padecimiento de exilio y la errancia. Y para colmo, en mi caso, llevando a cuestas la culpa y ademรกs la duda provocada por el interrogante que habรญa crecido en forma obsesiva dentro de mรญ: ยฟcuรกl serรก en realidad, y por fin,ย mi tierra prometida?
Me despedรญ de Massada y de Safed. Saludรฉ a Tiberรญades, y recorrรญ, una vez mรกs la ruta perimetral al Mar de Galilea. Llorรฉ largamente junto al Muro Sagrado en Jerusalรฉn, y me dejรณ llevar por mis pasos a la ciudadela de David y Mea Sharim y los museos. Vaguรฉ dรญas enteros por los serpenteantes callejuelas de Yaffo, de Haifa, de Akko. . .
Fuimos ajustando los detalles del viaje en funciรณn del reingreso de Laura a sus clases en su colegio secundario. Mi padre, Elรญas y Rosaโla hermana de Marcosโhabrรญan de ocuparse de todo lo necesario para nuestra reinserciรณn en Buenos Aires.
A todo esto, y en tanto yo me sumergรญa en mi nuevo proyecto de retorno, Marcos se afirmaba cada vez mรกs en sus actividades. Fue nombrado delegado polรญtico del kibutz ante la central con su sede en Tel Aviv. Claudia, asimismo, militaba en grupos juveniles y le asignaban tareas de responsabilidad cada vez mayores. Proyectaba, tambiรฉn, ingresar a la universidad para estudiar alguna de las carreras de ciencias sociales.ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย El 21 de diciembre de 1991 serรญa la fecha en que Laura y yo partirรญamos desde el aeropuerto Ben Gurion hacia Buenos Aires. Habรญamos dispuesto una fecha antes del fin de aรฑo, de comรบn acuerdo con Marcos, para evitar la celebraciรณn forzada e inevitablemente dolorosa. Por motivos parecidos rechacรฉ toda propuesta de despidida por parte de los amigos del kibutz.
No todos, por cierto, aprobaban mi determinaciรณn: algunos pocos ensayaban actividades comprensivas. Las charlas que tuve en esos dรญas me retrotraรญan a las que solรญamos tener en los grupos de estudio de la Hebraica.
Allรญ se enfatizaba la idea de que el sionismo merece una entrega total y nos coloca por encima de intereses individuales. Y yo estaba actuando a la inversa: claudicaba, desertaba, โdescendรญaโ. . . Lo รบnico que tenรญa que oponer era el duro conflicto por el que atravesaba y que enfermada a Laura y me pose a las puertas de que me sucediera lo mismo. ยฟSerรญa eso, acaso, a la causa sionista? ยฟHabรญa que pagar un precio tan alto?
Por supuesto que no iba a encontrar respuestas a esos interrogantes. Ademรกs, sabรญaโpor aquella voltereta jasรญdicaโque โlas respuestas certeras clausuran la posibilidad de seguir formulando nuevas preguntasโ. Era consciente que estaba desechando la idea nuclear del sionismo pero, de ninguna manera, desertaba mi condiciรณn de judรญa.
–Aquรญ, y por mรกs que hay conflictos con nuestros vecinos, nunca te van a gritar: ยกjudรญa de mierda! โ argumentaban algunas.
Y tambiรฉn eso era cierto. Pero tampoco esa sola razรณn, a moda de respuesta o justificaciรณn, clausuraba nuevas preguntas:ย ยฟDeben los judรญos, en un mundo que marcha velozmente hacia la globalizaciรณn, persistir en el modelo tradicional del ghetto?ย ยฟDeben encerrarse en sus recintos por temor a perder la identidad?
Yo habรญa participado en mil debates sobre estos temas. La ecuaciรณn sionismo y/o judaรญsmo fue desde mi niรฑez, un problema siempre a resolver en el futuro. Mi formaciรณn estuvo orientada hacia el rechazo de las ideas aperturistas quizรก como lรณgica prolongaciรณn de las ideas cimentadas en los duros tiempos previos al establecimiento del estado judรญo.
Mi diario, en cierto aspecto, no es otra cosa que un itinerario de transgresiones y rebeldรญas. Al releerlo suelo preguntarme:ย ยฟcuรกl de las Marcelas escribiรณ ese diario? Pero, sin embargo, en medio de dudas e interrogantes, algo estaba gestando e iba teniendo carรกcter de permanente. Y se trababa de ciertos aspectos de mi identidad cuyo perfil ya no podrรญa prescindirโestaba comprobadoโde las nutrientes argentinas.
Todos mis antepasados familiares se vieron obligadosโno pudieron elegirโa cortar abruptamente sus raรญces. Ya habรญan cruzado y recruzado el Atlรกntico, abandonando culturas, lenguajes, llenรกndose de nostalgias con cada partida. Fueron dejando paisajes, idiomas y canciones de Europa o el Oriente, para interrumpir en el campo entrerriano o en el conventillo urbano de Once o de Barracas, y despuรฉs hacer, otra vez, sus valijas y volver a cruzar el mar, resignando nuevas culturas, nuevos afectos, en procura de esa, tan supuesta, tan deseada, tierra prometida. Porque desde el nacimiento mismo de ese pueblo se viene asignando la consigna, โEl aรฑo que viene en Jerusalรฉn. . .โ
Y cada mudanza implicaba una penosa amputaciรณn como un cuerpo que va dejando jirones a su paso.
I wonโt deny that I have often had the temptation to call him, search for him, know something about him, write him, but I never did it: I couldnโt. Every so often, I devoted entire pages of my diary to him. I recognized how much he had influenced me, provoking the changes that would come later on; I conceded to him that he had unleashed a severe self-questioning of my identity, which, permitted me a sense of belonging to Argentinean culture that I didnโt know that I possessed.
And on top of all that, it has been Josรฉ Luis who helped me take off those veils of a sensuality hidden under mandates and precepts, programmed since my birth, or perhaps, before. I thought about Josรฉ Luis, and I imagined that he had already left behind his feelings for me. That everything had ended. That this โepisodeโ that we lived was definitive, and just as I felt at that time, thatโs it, an episode or a fleeting passion, product of the excitement of my leaving. He would have movedโI thoughtโand would be living with a partner, no longer in that beat-up studio on Montevideo Street, but in another place in the city: San Telmo or El Abasto or Balvane
It had been some time since, in Argentina, Carvallo had become Economics Minister and, as Secretary of State, Menem had named Di Tella. To these changes, corresponded a series of specific changes, all within a system that was known by the name convertibility. I was keeping up to date through specialized newspapers that I once again consulted periodically: stabilization and growing investment in economic activities, although with an increase in unemployment, the consequence of the fiscal adjustments, privatization and, in general, the shrinking of the state.
Despite my lack of confidence and skepticism toward Peronism and especially toward Menem, the measures seemed auspicious to me: it didnโt cease amazing me that they could be implemented by a democracy. I would have run, if it were possible, to comment, debate all these changes with Josรฉ Luis: I would insist that he justify how a Justicialist government could carry out a such a profound transformation, and more so, by using unequivocally liberal instruments.
The physical distancing from Marcos was happening in a natural way. Nevertheless, I didnโt have enough courage (neither did Marcos) to sleep in separate beds. Besides, Marcosโ trips were quite constant. In one or another manner, everything contributed to desire disappearing completely. At one point, I supposed that Marcos could have gone as far as having relations with another woman and thisโthat in other times I wasnโt even capable of imaginingโseemed to me to be reasonable, understandable. And another time, as had happened to me two years earlier, I was getting ready for a new goodbye. It was if I inexorably must and, for my condition as a Jew, experience the suffering of exile and wandering. And on top of that, in my case, carrying with me the guilt and also the doubt provoked by the questioning provoked by the questioning that had grown in me in an obsessive way: which will be in reality, and finally, my promised land?
We were arranging the details of the trip with regard to Laura return to her classes in her high school. My father, Elรญas and RosaโMarcosโ sisterโwould have to take care of everything necessary for our reinsertion into Buenos Aires.
With all this, and as I submerged myself in my new project of return, Marcos involved himself more and more in his activities. He was named political delegate of the kibbutz to the central committee with its headquarters in Tel Aviv. Claudia, likewise, was active in youth groups and they assigned her tasks with more and more responsibility. She planned, also, to enroll in the university to study one of the majors in social sciences.
December 21, 1991 would be the date in which Laura and I would leave from Ben Gurion Airport for Buenos Aires. We had chosen a date before the first of the year, in agreement with Marcos, to avoid the forces and inevitably painful celebration. For similar reasons, I refused any proposal of a goodbye from the kibbutz friends.
Not everyone, of course, approved my choice: a few tried extensive activity. The chats that I had in those days brought me back to those that we used to have in the study groups of la Hebraica. There, they emphasized that ย idea that Zionism required a complete commitment and we put ourselves above our individual interests. And I was acting in the reverse direction: I was throwing in the towel, deserting, โdescendingโ. . . The only thing that I had to oppose was the harsh conflict that passed through and sickened Laura and put me at the point that the same thing could happen to me. Would it be that, perhaps, the Zionist cause? Did the price have to be so high?
Of course, I wasnโt going to find answers to those unanswered questions. Moreover, I knew thatโby that Hassidic mindbenderโthat the sure answer to close off the possibility to continue formulating new questions.โ I was conscient that I was throwing out the nuclear idea of Zionism, but, in no way, deserting my identification as a Jew.
โHere, and except that there are conflicts with out neighbors, they will never yell at you: โShitty Jew!โ
And that was true too. But not that reason alone, as an answer or a justification, closed off new questions. Should the Jews, in a world that was moving very fast toward globalization, persist in the traditional model of the ghetto? Should they lock themselves up in their enclosures for fear of losing their identity?
I had participated in a thousand debates about these topics. The equation: Zionism and/or Judaism was there since my childhood, a problem to always be answered in the future. My formation was oriented toward the rejection of progressive ideas, perhaps as a logical prolongation of ideas based in the tough times before the establishment of the Jewish State.
My diary, in a certain way, is nothing but an itinerary of transgressions and rebellions. On re-reading it, I continue to ask myself: which of the Marcelas write that diary? But, however, in the midst of doubts and questions, something was gestating and taking on a permanent character. And it dealt with certain aspects of my identity, whose profile could no longer be gone withoutโit was provenโby Argentinean nutrients.
All my family ancestors saw themselves obligedโthey couldnโt chooseโto abruptly cut their roots. They had crossed and re-crossed the Atlantic, abandoning languages, cultures, filling themselves with nostalgia at every leaving. They were leaving behind landscapes, languages and songs of Europe and the Orient, to end up in the plains of Entre Rรญos or a tenement in Once of Barracas, and after making up, once more their suitcases and cross the ocean again, giving up new cultures, new feelings, in search of that, so alleged, so desired, promised land. Because since the very birth of that country, they came singing the chant: โNext Year in Jerusalem. . .โ
And every move implied a painful amputation as with a body that with leave pieces behind.
Rubรฉn Cukier, nacido y criado en Buenos Aires en 1964, en una Argentina polรญticamente violenta. Ahora vive en Israel. Cukier elige colores y sombras que revelan un anhelo por una realidad menos superficial y menos engaรฑosa. Las formas, dimensiones y colores dan forma a los sueรฑos y pesadillas, e incluso aluden a una nociรณn de esperanza. El humor se usa para reflejar miedos, hรกbitos y deseos que la mayorรญa de nosotros negamos y reprimimos profundamente dentro de yuxtaposiciones inesperadas que, al principio, son desconcertantes y provocan pensamientos, pero cuando se consideran mรกs de cerca, producen reconocimiento. El reconocimiento de sueรฑos, miedos o pensamientos que nosotros mismos pudimos haber experimentado en un momento u otro.
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Rubรฉn Cukier, born and raised in Buenos Aires in 1964, in a politically violent Argentina. He now lives in Israel. Cukier chooses colors and shades that reveal a yearning for a less superficial, less deceptive reality. The forms, dimensions and colors give shape to dreams and nightmares, and even allude to a notion of hope. Humor is used to reflect fears, habits and desires that most of us deny and suppress deep within Unexpected juxtapositions that, at first, are baffling and thought provoking but when considered more closely, produce recognition. The recognition of dreams, fears or thoughts that we ourselves may have experienced at one time or another.
El diccionario define el surrealismo, como un estilo de arte y literatura, enfatizando el significado subconsciente o no racional de las imรกgenes a las que se llega mediante el automatismo o la explotaciรณn de los efectos del azar y las yuxtaposiciones inesperadas.
The dictionary defines surrealism , as a style of art and literature, stressing the subconscious or non rational significance of imagery arrived at by automatism or the exploitation of chance effects and unexpected juxtapositions.
Noemรญ Gerstein naciรณ en Buenos Aires en 1908. Estudiรณ en la Escuela Nacional de Bellas Artes y en los Cursos Libres de Arte con el escultor Alfredo Bigatti. Patrocinada por el gobierno francรฉs viajรณ a Parรญs y allรญ concurriรณ a la Grande Chaumiรจre para estudiar bajo la guรญa del reconocido artista ruso Ossip Zadkine. Destacada por sus esculturas, el 3 de abril de 1975 la Academia Nacional de Bellas Artes, la designรณ Acadรฉmica de Nรบmero y fue la primera mujer nombrada con dicho tรญtulo. Participรณ de numerosas exposiciones, entre ellas: en el Museo de Arte Moderno de Nueva York, Estados Unidos, en 1967; en la Bienal de Escultura al aire libre Middleheim en Amberes, Bรฉlgica, en el aรฑo 1970 y en la Bienal de Venecia, Italia, en los aรฑos 1956, 1962 y 1964. Ademรกs, exhibiรณ en importantes salas y museos en Alemania, Francia e Israel. En Argentina, expuso tambiรฉn en mรบltiples galerรญas e instituciones como, por ejemplo: Museo Provincial de Bellas Artes “Rosa Galisteo de Rodrรญguez” de la provincia de Santa Fe y Galerรญa El Triรกngulo, Galerรญa Vermeer, Galerรญa Rubbers y la Galerรญa Guernica de Buenos Aires, entre otros. En 1969, el Estado de Israel la nominรณ entre las doce personalidades artรญsticas mรกs importante del mundo. Muriรณ en Buenos Aires, en 1996.
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Noemรญ Gerstein was born in Buenos Aires in 1908. She studied at the National School of Fine Arts and Free Art Courses with the sculptor Alfredo Bigatti. Sponsored by the French government, she traveled to Paris and attended the Grande Chaumiรจre to study under the guidance of renowned Russian artist Ossip Zadkine. Noted for its sculptures, on April 3, 1975, the National Academy of Fine Arts, designated her Academic of Number and was the first woman named with that title. She participated in numerous exhibitions, including: at the Museum of Modern Art in New York, United States, in 1967; at the Middleheim Open-Air Sculpture Biennial in Antwerp, Belgium, in 1970 and at the Venice Biennale, Italy, in 1956, 1962 and 1964. In addition, she exhibited in important halls and museums in Germany, France and Israel . In Argentina, she also exhibited in multiple galleries and institutions such as: “Rosa Galisteo de Rodrรญguez” Provincial Museum of Fine Arts of the province of Santa Fe and El Triรกngulo Gallery, Vermeer Gallery, Rubbers Gallery and the Guernica Gallery of Buenos Aires, among others. In 1969, the State of Israel nominated her among the twelve most important artistic personalities in the world. She died in Buenos Aires, in 1996.
Juana Ciesler, argentina, fue licenciada en Ciencias Quรญmicas por la Universidad de Buenos Aires y poeta. Cursรณ estudios en literatura en la UBA y de mรบsica en el Conservatorio Municipal Manuel de Falla. Ha publicado los libros: De ufos a veredas (1966), O fuego en los Palacios de Agua (1969), La Misiรณn de las Mรกscaras (1982), Celeste y Negra (1989), Tulipanes en la Cabeza (1986), Los sueรฑos de ADN (1999), y Canciรณn de la Tierra (2001), La Sexta Dรฉcada, Milรก, 2006. Participรณ en muchas antologรญas.
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Juana Ciesler from Argentina, has a degree in Chemical Sciences from the University of Buenos Aires and was a poet. She studied literature at the UBA and music at the Municipal Conservatory Manuel de Falla. She has published the books: From De ufos a veredas(1966), (1969), O fuego en los Palacios de Agua (1969), La Misiรณn de las Mรกscaras (1982), Celeste y Negra (1989), Tulipanes en la Cabeza (1986), Los sueรฑos de ADN (1999), y Canciรณn de la Tierra (2001) La Sexta Dรฉcada, Milรก, 2006. She has participated in many anthologies.
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Juana Ciesler trabaja con palabras que no estรกn dispuestas trabajar en las condiciones que otros las ponemos. Eso demuestra el esplendor de su oficio. Una alquimia que pretende pasar por alquimia.
Luis Chiarroni
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Juana Ciesler works with words that are not ready to work in the conditions that others put them. That demonstrates the splendor of her trade. An alquemy that intends to be make gold.
in the play of a man acting inside a few 3 cm of cerebrum
underlying the theorem of dimensions.
He could never have emerged from his
homeland tomb earth.
The story awarded him death
in a fusillade at the edge of the forest
on the last day of the war, not
Before โhearingโ the last cry of each one
of his three children, of her who had given him the children:
the brother returned in a dusk of chestnuts
โI have been waiting for you a long time you are lateโ
the heaviness of the hand on his shoulder
covered by the absence of a white shroud
when the handsome athlete might have married the orphaned
sister of the only brother in far-off lands
The East no
America no
The last remaining brothers in the far-off Polish land
Once Lithuanian, another time Bolshevik
turn their backs on an ochre dawn go away
far along the path.
The aged grandmother, young guest of the odorless waves
of the bloodied shawl, now, somehow
holds on to the oak
Abandoned child returns to recognize her
They question each other; with some abstract fluttering
two very distinct hands stroke brother Zalman.
Itโs hard to know how many years go by
For a diminutive light that lingers.
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โInterioresโ
Caminabas vos la sombra y yo
Cuando vi junto el foco del รกrbol
henchida de primavera una sola
sombra,
supe que vos caminabas en mรญ
mรกs no conmigo
___________________________
“Interiors”
You were walking the shadow and I
When nearby I saw the heart of the tree
swollen with spring a single
shadow,
I knew that you were walking in me
but not with me.
_____________________
โNo cantes la muerteโ
des de- a โ Leo Ferrรฉ
no cantes la muerte
aรบn en las dulces ceremonias de los Thiasoi
coronando guirnaldas
o en el pecho partido del infinito
en el alma destrozada del delirio
en los fuegos dorados que en los dioses nos convertรญan
En las catacumbas del tiempo sabio
donde la refracciรณn hace color
donde una mano hace color
donde lloramos y lloraron y lloremos
donde pudren y convidan las habitantes del dolor
donde callamos y no cuajamos y tentamos
en la gran tensiรณn de lo perfecto
el vientre bolita
los huesos desterrados del asilo
donde todos se abandonaron
pro no si no tรบ mismo ( o un dios?)
Poseerรกsโporque nada querrรกs mรกs que Ser al hombre
en el llanto seis meses en del zanjรณn, las ratas,
el cielo inverso
donde el puro soรฑador buceรณ al otro reino
do la gitana espaciรณ pan cuando la siena manaba
sangre y el hombre รกngel su amor
donde acabar la vida
detrรกs del tiempo suspiro
en el negro estertor
blanca cuchilla
Donde callan las muchedumbres,
donde el repulsivo poder oprime y
la puerta no se encuentra
entre los venenos de la tentativa
โ โ โ externos
Junto al pleno animal
en la enjundiosa sombra
en las fosfatadas arcadas
en los jardines donde โyacenโlos muertos
en la sucia injusticia
el anillo melancรณlico
en la savia alumbrante
en la dorada luna, en las
ceremonias de la vida
en la cรกrcel donde ahogan
en los hospitales donde sufrimos, en toda revoluciรณn, en toda pesadumbre, en el arco pajaril; la inquietud del ocรฉano; en la ausencia lacerante, en la desesperanza, la asfixia, el horizonte, la catedral de la historia, la iglesia de una sola palabra, en el monte o en el desierto, en el espejismo animado, en los blancos cabellos del terror, en la roja explosiรณn de lo que ha de ser, en ti misma, en la perfecciรณn de la raรญz cuadrada, entre los extraรฑos cuantum como en la constancia del latido en la calle abandonada de yuyus, en la vieja aldea del bosque, la irridaciรณn; en vos alto cรณndor, alta piedra, alto humano,
no cantes la muerte,
en la penitenciaria, la horca, la cruz, la garra en las vรญsceras
no cantes de la muerte
Se canta. Sola se canta en lo que Es
Vida, sagrada vida con la muerte estallando
(su tu aullido)
So puedes cรกntalo en posesiรณn, en armonรญa
Del dolor, de la pestilencia, de la negra pareja
de los pies rugosos
de la lรกmpara que mitiga
del hermoso Leonardo, del Einstein
no cantes la muerte
_______________________________
“donโt sing of death”
from – of -to โ Leo Ferrรฉ
even in the sweet ceremonies of Thiasol
garlanded with flowers
or in the bosom detached from the infinite
in the soul destroyed by delirium
in the golden fires in which the gods transformed us
In the catacombs of wise time
where refraction creates color
where a hand creates color
where we wept and they wept and we shall weep
where the dwellers in pain decay and appeal
where we call for silence and we do not congeal and we risk
in great tension toward the perfect
in the small ball of belly
the exiled bones of refuge
where all were abandoned
but not if not yourself (or a god?)
You will possess โ because you will never want more than Being the man
In the sobbing six months of the underworld, the rats,
the inverted sky
where the pure dreamer plumbed the other kingdom
the Gypsy woman divided bread when her temple throbbed
blood and the man angel her love
where ending life
behind the tender sigh
in the black death-rattle
white knife
Where the hosts go quiet, where the ugly power oppresses and
the door cannot be found
among the venoms of the tentative
โ โ โ of the extremes
beside the entire animal
in its substantial shadow
In the phosphate arcades
In the gardens where โ lie โ the dead
In foul injustice
the melancholy circlet
in the resin illuminated
by the golden moon, in the
ceremonies of life
in the jail where they drown
in hospitals where we suffer, in every revolution, in every bereavement, in the avian arch; the restlessness of
of the ocean; in the lacerating absence, in the desperation, the asphyxia, the horizon, the cathedral of history, the church of a single word, in the mountain or in the desert, in the animated mirage, in the white hairs of terror, in the red explosion of what ought to be, in yourself, in the perfection of the square root, among the strange quanta like the constant flagellation in the street grown over with weeds, in the old village of the forest, irradiation; in you lofty condor, lofty stone, lofty cinder, lofty human,
donโt sing of death
in prison, on the gallows, on the cross, the claw in your viscera
_______________________________________________________________________________________Nacรญ y crecรญ en Buenos Aires. El final de mi niรฑez estuvo marcado por la dictadura militar, que constituyรณ asimismo el trasfondo de toda mi adolescencia. Luego de aquella cerrazรณn, la universidad pรบblica fue una fiesta, un estallido de color y de ideas, de mezcla, de esperanzas.En rigor, de mezclas sabรญa ya bastante, aunque menos en lo polรญtico y lo social que en lo religioso, por la doble impronta familiar: judeo-cristiana. A esas dos tradiciones dediquรฉ estudios y vivencias sensibles durante mi vida entera, hasta hoy.En la UBA me orientรฉ hacia la filologรญa clรกsica y hacia la literatura latinoamericana, y en particular la argentina. Asรญ me amasรฉ como filรณloga, especialista en retรณrica, crรญtica literaria y estudios de las mujeres y de gรฉnero.ย Siempre junto a la mรบsica, me inclinรฉ a la poesรญa desde la infancia. Soy tambiรฉn narradora (y con menor frecuencia, dramaturga).Idealista hasta el dolor, creo que el humor a menudo nos salva o nos vivifica. Y el albergue del lenguaje es un sitio privilegiado para ello โel otro es la imagen. Me siento clรกsica y moderna en mis gustos, y algo anacrรณnica en varios aspectos. Me alucinan los saltos cientรญficos y tecnolรณgicos, que respeto y uso con alegrรญa, aunque tomo distancias.No hablarรฉ ahora aquรญ de mis libros publicados u otras intervenciones o reconocimientos recibidos. Mi vida y mis prรกcticas son modestas, rescato los atardeceres cada dรญa, camino. Necesito mucho silencio, y esa patria mayor que es la naturaleza, de la que soy hija constantemente admirada y agradecida.Al igual que otros, reconozco que leer es imprescindible para mรญ, no solo como fuente de trabajo sino como pasiรณn inalterable y hรกlito de subsistencia. Casi seis mil aรฑos es mucho como para no estar cansados pero, mientras no sabemos cuรกntos mรกs nos restan, debemos intentar seguir reparando el mundo y sonreรญr. Personalmente, entre otras cosas, me propongo continuar escribiendo.Marรญa Gabriela Mizraje
ย
_______________________________________________
I was born and raised in Buenos Aires. The end of my childhood was marked by the military dictatorship, which also constituted the background of my entire adolescence. After that ended, the public university was a party, a burst of color and ideas, of mixing, of hopes.
Strictly speaking, I already knew a lot about mixtures, although less politically and socially than religiously, because of the double family imprint: Judeo-Christian. To those two traditions I dedicated sensitive studies and experiences during my entire life, until today.
At the Universidad de Buenos Aires, I oriented myself towards classical philology and Latin American literature, and in particular Argentina. Thus I prepared myself as a philologist, specialist in rhetoric, literary criticism and studies of women and gender. Always surrounded by the music, I was inclined to poetry since childhood. I am also a narrator (and less frequently, playwright).
Idealistic, even to when it is painful, I think humor often saves or revives us. And the language shelters a privileged place for it – the other is the image. I feel classical and modern in my tastes, and somewhat anachronistic in several aspects. I am amazed at the scientific and technological leaps forward, which I respect and use with joy, although I take my distance.
I will not talk here now about my published books or other activities or acknowledgments received. My life and my practices are modest, I rescue the sunsets every day, I walk. I need a lot of silence, and that greater homeland that is nature, of which I am a constantly admiring and grateful daughter.
Like others, I recognize that reading is essential for me, not only as a source of work, but as an unalterable passion and breath of subsistence. Almost six thousand years is a lot to not be tired but, while we do not know how many more we have left, we must try to continue repairing the world and smiling. Personally, among other things, I intend to continue writing.